Where Crack Comes Home To Roost's Journal

You Should Learn How to Say No - [1/1]
Title: You Should Learn How to Say No
Author:

zephyrina
Pairing: Bob Bryar/Ray Toro
Rating: NC-17
POV/Wordcount: Third - 11,833 words
Summary: Brian’s sigh fills the earpiece, and the image that flashes in Bob’s mind is a frame of Life on the Murder Scene, the moment when Brian covers his face with his hand. He coughs, tentative, and drops the bomb. “It seems that Ray and I got… uh, married? Last night? By accident?”
Disclaimer: The guys aren't mine, it never happened.
Author Notes: Inspired by this post at

we_are_cities + #18 Forced Union at

wtf27
For

valmontheights. This is your Sweet Charity fic, I hope you'll like it. As usual, ♥ to

anne_elliot for all her help and cheers, ♥ to

ky_betty who did the beta duties. Thank you so much.
Crack fic. Title stolen from 'Violet', The Hole.

It's only when the word 'groom' (repeated twice) eventually catches his eyes that Bob sobers up. At once.

#21: Doppleganger
Title: A Nearly Universe-Ending Combination
Author: Never
Fandom: Star Trek 2009
Pairing: Kirk/Spock
Rating: Um…we’ll go with PG-13
Disclaimer: Not mine.
Warning: Crack.
Summary: Remember that old TOS episode “The Enemy Within”? The one where Kirk is duplicated by the transporter? Well, add crack, shake, and serve.
Author’s Notes: The new Star Trek or whatever fandom is calling it. This is kinda how I see the episode “The Enemy Within” happening with this new group…if the writer was on crack. This is my first Star Trek fic ever, and therefore my first Kirk/Spock fic ever too! So much fun to write. Also, written for

wtf27 challenge #21: Doppleganger

***

Kirk has the feeling he's trying to be...enticing.

Crossposted

[18. Forced Union] The Best Way Not To Handle A Crisis (0/?)
Title: Not My Idea of Vacation (The Best Way Not To Handle A Crisis 0/?)
Author:

mirabilelectu
Fandom(s): Sports RPF (speed skating), but obviously wildly AU.
Disclaimer: All made up. Resemblance to existing organisations is a total coincidence. Really.
Rating: G at the moment, likely to go up.
Prompt: 18. Forced Union -- taken quite loosely, though.
Summary: SIUO gets tasked by the UNE Security Council* with solving some crime. A pissed off SIA Håvard Bøkko gets to lead a team assembled by the Security Council and containing a wanted man and uncover what the hell is going on. (Hopefully he'll get to go back to his vacation once the solving is done.)
* No relation. Honest.

( Fake cut to my fic journal. )

Title: Not quite as planned
Author:

killerweasel
Fandom(s): Angel/Supernatural
Characters: Lindsey McDonald, Dean Winchester, Sam Winchster
Prompt: 005. Tentacles!
Rating: R
Word count: 2,091
A/N: AU After Angel's Not Fade Away & Supernatural's Bedtime Stories

Not quite as planned

Title: Careful what you wish for
Author:

killerweasel
Fandom(s): Leverage
Characters: Eliot Spencer, Alec Hardison, assorted characters
Prompt: 004. Wings
Rating: R
Word count: 1,366
A/N: AU After Leverage's The Homecoming Job

Careful what you wish for

Current Mood: cheerful

#003 Transformation (inanimate)
Title: Ties that Bind
Author: nebula99
Fandom: Criminal Minds
Rating: FRAO/ NC-17
Type: Slash
Pairing: Hotch/Reid
Summary: Reid looked aghast. “I can’t put him in the washing machine – he’ll drown!”
Prompt: 003 Transformation (inanimate) for

wtf27

Author’s note: A birthday present for

severity_softly who kind of challenged me to this. Only it’s not a pencil. Happy Birthday!

And great thanks to

slash_girl for most excellent beta-fu.

link to my livejournal below

TIES THAT BIND

FIC: The Prostitute Quandary (Prompt 20)
Title: The Prostitute Quandary, or Why Leonard Will Never Eat Thai Food at Midnight (Again)
Author: Sabine
Rating: PG
Fandom: The Big Bang Theory/Stargate: Atlantis
Character/Pairings: Sheldon Cooper/Rodney McKay, surprise pairings
Summary: Leonard meets another member of Sheldon's species.
Prompt: 20. Aliens
Disclaimer: The characters belong to CBS, SciFi, etc.

The Prostitute Quandary

Title: Poor Little Dark Lord
Fandom: Harry Potter/Jack Chick tracts
Characters: Voldemort, Harry Potter
Prompt: [27] OMG We Forgot ___
Word Count: 728
Rating: PG
Summary: Voldemort discovers a Chick Tract. AU.
Disclaimer: This is a non-profit, amateur effort not intended to infringe on the rights of JK Rowling, Jack Chick, or any other copyright holder.
Author's Notes: AU. Besides the tangent from Deathly Hallows, in this timeline Voldemort only has six Horcruxes; Harry never was one.
( Who Will You Serve? )

Crack!Fic 2/27 - #17 Trading Places - "Happy Birthday"
Title – Happy Birthday!
Author – Sealgirl in

seal_girl
Fandom – Dungeons and Dragons Cartoon
Characters – Eric the Cavalier
Prompt - #17 Swapfic; “Uni & Eric – an unexpected outcome – it’s my party"
Word Count – 664
Rating – G
Summary – Uni has a “birthday” and Eric gets a nasty surprise!
A/N – Warning! Official crack! Maybe it makes no sense to anyone else, but that doesn’t matter! Set Season 1. Written for the

danddtoon ficathon 14th August 2008.
Continuity – 2/27
Table – Crack!tastic.

( Happy Birthday )

Current Mood: contemplative

Title: Getting better
Author:

killerweasel
Fandom(s): Angel/Buffy
Characters: Lindsey McDonald, Spike
Prompt: 024. Slaves.
Rating: NC-17
Word count: 1,765
Warnings: graphic descriptions, dark themes
AU After Angel's To Shanshu in L.A. & Buffy's Wild at Heart

Getting better

Current Mood: thirsty

20. Aliens (Made Them Do It) Don't Ask by Sperrywink
Title: Don't Ask
Author: Sperrywink
Fandom: Stargate: Atlantis
Pairing: Bates/Sheppard
Rating: NC-17
Warning: Dubious Consent
Word Count: 4,405
Summary: For

wtf27 Aliens (Made Them Do It) challenge. Bates is horrified that Sheppard expects him to go through with this.
Disclaimer: Don't own. All lies.
Author Notes: Beta'd by the wonderful

coreopsis. All errors and inadequacies are mine.

( Don't Ask )

#3. Transformation (inanimate) Doctor Who: Black as Stone
TITLE: Black as Stone
AUTHOR: Matt
FANDOM(S): Doctor Who
PAIRING: Nine, Rose
SUMMARY: At least he’d been wearing his coat. Rose wouldn’t have recognised him otherwise.
RATING: PG

Over at my LJ. Follow the title link above.

Monochrome - [1/1]
Title: Monochrome
Author:

zephyrina
Pairing: Bob Bryar/Ray Toro
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 3,115
Summary: “Hey, stranger.” Ray’s tone is quiet, even if his heartbeat is steadily increasing. His finger hasn’t moved from the trigger. “You’re back.”
Disclaimer/Warnings: The guys aren't mine, it never happened.
Author Notes: Zombies AU. Written for the Spookathon @ Insane Journal, prompt Bob/Ray, Zombie + #09 Supernatural creatures @

wtf27. Betalove to

un_related, ♥ to

anne_elliot and

veecious for the constant cheerleading.

(When Ray hears the knock, he almost jumps up from the chair.)

Current Mood: relaxed
Current Music: tv

Fic: We Don't Have to Explain It. Bart/Carol, Bart/Tim, Deadpool. PG-13.
Title: We Don't Have to Explain It.
Fandom: DC/Marvel
Characters: Deadpool, Bob Agent of HYDRA, Weasel, Irene Merryweather, Cable, Kon, Bart/Tim, Bart/Carol.
Prompt: For

fanfic100: 17. Brown, for

wtf27: 21. Doppelganger, for

random_30: 010. The what with the what?, for

marvel_drabbles: 01. Fingers, and for

dcu_freeforall: 37. Magic
Word Count: 3200
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Carol and Tim both have a thing for Bart. Deadpool narrates. Well, mostly.
Author's Notes: Hey, feebs! Deadpool, here! I duct taped Shana to a chair again (in REVENGE, but you'll learn about that later). Anywho, I got some stuff to say! First of all, like that beta chick,

julius12 said, "Fourth wall got busted so hard it doesn't know what hit it. It's lying in the street asking if anyone got the truck number." So yeah, consider yourself warned. Also,

second_batgirl? This is partly your fault, so you better be happy! Or, you know, run and hide before they get sick of throwing the rocks and rotting fruit at Shana and decide to turn on you. Just thought I'd warn you! Oh, also, there isn't much plot. Mainly because SOMEONE kept going off topic. Oh, wait, that's me, isn't it? It's brilliant, go read it.

Fic: Blood and Family, Fic: In Heaven.
Title: Blood and Family
Author:

shananagin
Characters/Pairing: Ted/Babs, Dick/Babs, Tim/Bernard, Bruce/Selina, hints of Dinah/Helena and Steph/Cass. Pretty much every bat-related character you can think of, plus a few arrows.
Prompt: 24. Slaves.
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 8050
Summary: The Bats are vampires, the Birds are slayers, and they fight. Also, there is drama.
Author's Notes: Dedicated to

cissie_king and

unrequited_rain. Thanks to my wonderful beta,

julius12. This might be one of my favorite things I've ever written.

Part 1
Part 2
Part 3

Title: In Heaven
Author:

shananagin
Claim: supporting characters
Characters/Pairing: Lian, Dick/Roy
Rating: PG
Word Count: 580
Prompt: 13. Fuck or die.
Summary: Roy's sad and he won't tell Lian why.
Warnings: Character death
Author's Notes: Happy belated birthday,

felonazcorp! Have something depressing! ETA: Very quick beta job by

julius12!

Fic: 'Venus to the Sun'
Title: Venus to the Sun
Author: Never
Fandom: Supernatural RPS
Pairing: Jared/Jensen/Jeff, Jared/Jensen, and Jeff/Jensen
Rating: Hard R
Disclaimer: Not mine. Not true.
Summary: The day Jensen steps off the roof of his office building, he discovers a world where fairies, dragons, and gnomes not only exist, but live side by side with humans.
Notes: Apparently, this is the first in a series. Over 14,000 words. For

wtf27 challenge #12: Fantasy AU (urban). Parts beta’d by

arnie1967 and

d41j0ubu - any other mistakes are all mine.

***

With his eyes still on the sky, he takes a step and feels nothing but air.

Cross-posted

Fic: Holy Deadly Dessert! Superman/Batman, Supergirl/Batgirl. PG-13.
Title: Holy Deadly Dessert!
Fandom: Silver Age
Characters: Superman/Batman, Supergirl/Batgirl, Robin.
Prompt: 13. Fuck or die.
Word Count: 2000
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Superman's caught in Kryptonite pudding! It's up to the Batfamily to rescue them!
Warning: I use the term "Dominoed Daredoll" twice in this fic.
Author's Notes: For the lovely

genclay who drew me this gorgeous picture and asked for Batman/Superman; pudding. And I write this. Thanks to my wonderful, doomish beta

julius12!

Title: Left of West (1-4/4)
Title: Left of West
Author: Hannah R. Orlove
Fandom: House, MD
Rating: R
Pairing: House/Stacy, House/Cuddy, strong House-Wilson friendship
Warnings: None.
Notes: Written for

wtf27, prompt #4: Wings. Thanks to

tartary_lamb,

cenori,

cryptictac,

deelaundry, and

thedeadparrot, in various capacities, with extra to

emblem and

euclase.

I wake up scared, I wake up strange.
I wake up wondering if anything in my life is ever going to change.
I wake up scared, I wake up strange
and everything around me stays the same.
-
What A Good Boy, Barenaked Ladies

Part one.

Part two.

Part three.

Part four.

Fic: Life in Manchester. Bart/Tim. PG.
Title: Life in Manchester
Fandom: DCU
Characters: Bart/Tim, Carol, Preston, Steph, Bernard, Kon, Max Mercury, White Lightning.
Prompts: For

dcu_freeforall: 23. forcefield creation. For

au_abc: School. For

wtf27: High School AU. For

fanfic100: 88. School. And that's what we call multi-tasking!
Word Count: 6700
Rating: PG
Summary: Tim's parents saw the Flying Graysons fall to their deaths and decided Gotham was far too dangerous. So they moved to Manchester. Years later, a certain very fast kid also moved to Manchester. Wacky hijinks ensued.
Author's Notes: This was written for

geministar01 who requested "a Bart/Tim AU where Tim grew up in either Keystone City or Manchester." Thank you to

julius12 for being an awesome beta! This took me forever to write, so it's in three parts.

Part 1.
Part 2.
Part 3.

Fic: 'What Could It Hurt?'
Title: What Could It Hurt?
Author: Never
Pairing: Implied Pete/Patrick
Rating: R (for language)
Disclaimer: So not mine.
Warning: AU
Summary: Pete sends a link to a demo of his band’s music to Ryan Ross, guitar player of Pete’s favorite band, Panic at the Disco!
Author’s Notes: For

wtf27 challenge #17: Trading Places.

***

That's going to be us up there, one day

Cross-posted

Three for the price of one
Title: The White Room or here on LJ
Author: Pen
Fandom: popslash
Characters: Lance, Joey, Chris, Justin, JC
Rating: contains explicit sex
Prompt: 013 Fuck or die
Word Count: 11,165
Author's Notes: Coalition fighter pilots Joey, Lance and Chris have been captured by the League, and unpleasant demands are made of them.

Title: Slave
Author: Pen
Fandom: popslash
Characters: Lance, Chris
Rating: Gen
Prompt: 024 Slaves
Word Count: 1,860
"There was once a young man, son of a wealthy family, whose life was filled with ease and comfort, whose friends were worthy and respectable, and whose future was set fair."

Title: The Chronicles of Lancyn and Ser Chrisfer
Author: Pen
Fandom: popslash
Characters: Lance, Chris, and various along the way
Rating: Gen
Prompt: 011 Fantasy AU (traditional)
Word Count: this is an 'episodic' in that I write another story when I feel like it; so far a little over 36,000 words have been written, some before I started this challenge, some after, with the most recent story, 'Trials', around 10,000 words long.

I've now filled in nine of the prompts, though I should probably apologise for a sad lack of actual crackedness in these three. My prompts table is here.

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