Who would win a fight between...

Jurassic Fight Club

Mon, 28 Jul 2008 21:55:33 GMT

Jurassic Fight Club premieres tomorrow.

It appears to be like whodwinafight: The TV show, although it's limited specifically to dinosaurs.

Hopefully they won't mess it up, like the abysmal Animal Face-Off. That's the show that took the premise of robot and virtual reality versions of vicious predators battling to the death, and somehow made it boring.

Nice kitty

Sun, 20 Jul 2008 15:30:26 GMT

Leopard eats a fucking crocodile.

30 Japanese Hornets vs. 30,000 bees

Sat, 05 Apr 2008 18:24:11 GMT

See for yourself:

(The music and sound effect are a little silly though.)

Nerds on Sports - Final Four

Tue, 01 Apr 2008 15:02:33 GMT

The tournament enters its final rounds. A lot of the chaff has been culled thanks to your votes and we now have some pretty interesting match-ups for the Final Four:

Batman vs. Morpheus

AND

Wolverine vs. Luke Skywalker

Your vote determines the winner!

Nerds on Sports - Elite Eight

Tue, 25 Mar 2008 14:32:24 GMT

The Nerds on Sports March Madness continues. We've got a few epic battles this week - like Batman vs the T-1000 or Luke Skywalker vs Legolas - that you won't want to miss. Make sure to weigh in!

Wed, 19 Mar 2008 14:32:27 GMT

Empirical data.

Nerds on Sports March Madness Tournament - Round 2

Tue, 18 Mar 2008 20:58:48 GMT

Round Two of the Nerds on Sports tournament is up.

Apparently, the T-1000 barely beat Inigo Montoya, thus demonstrating the shocking fact that a lot of people on the Internet are morons.

Some of the Round Two match-ups are actually a bit interesting:

View Poll: Nerds on Sports Round Two

I mocked them last round for putting normal people against people/creatures with super or magic powers. However, Batman has some technobabble powers. And both he and Indiana Jones are much smarter than their opponent, and are used to facing super or supernatural opponents. So these should be good fights.

Edit: Whoops. I just noticed perich already posted about this. I had seen his post, but mistakenly thought it was his personal journal rather than the community. So my apologies for the duplicate.

Nerds On Sports - Sweet Sixteen

Tue, 18 Mar 2008 13:53:13 GMT

Thanks again to everyone who voted in last week's first round of the Nerds on Sports March Madness Tournament.

The results are up, as well as a new survey to vote in. This week's lineup:

Hyrule Conference

Jack Bauer vs. T-1000

Batman vs. Mr. Incredible

Buffy Summers vs. Morpheus

Captain James T. Kirk vs. Drizz’t Do’urden

Paragon City Conference

Indiana Jones vs. Wolverine

Optimus Prime vs. The Operative

Rick Deckard vs. Luke Skywalker

Legolas vs. Harry Potter

Basic Instructions on "Who Would Win"

Mon, 17 Mar 2008 17:12:15 GMT

I thought members of this group might appreciate this Basic Instructions comic.

Nerds on Sports March Madness Tournament

Tue, 11 Mar 2008 19:12:49 GMT

Here's a single elimination tournament of various nerd culture icons. They don't specify the criteria for picking one over another. I assume it's who'd win a fight, although it could be just which one you like more.

Some of the matchups are just stupid, pitting people/creatures with magic-powers and techno-babble powers against normal humans. Who'd win a fight between the T-1000 and Inigo Montoya? The correct answer to that question is, "Are you some sort of moron?"

Ultimate Movie and TV Badass Tournament - Update

Mon, 25 Feb 2008 23:08:35 GMT

[x-posted to my own journal]

I've compiled all of the entries for the Ultimate Movie and TV Badass Challenge. Currently, there are 108 of them. This would work best with a power of two, so I either need 20 more suggestions, or to remove 44 people, or else figure out some sort of seeding system and give a bunch of the people first round byes.

Feel free to make more suggestions or argue that someone should be removed. Especially look at the list sorted by actor to find redundantly similar characters, and argue which one should stay and which should go. For your new suggestions, remember the rule that it's humans with no superpowers only.

Also, does anyone want to actually run this tournament? If we wait for me to make an entry once every few weeks, it will take forever to finish.

Sorted by Movie/TV Show

Name	Movie/TV Show	Actor
Jack Bauer	24	Keifer Sutherland
King Leonidas	300	Gerard Butler
Joe	A Fistful of Dollars	Clint Eastwood
President James Marshall	Air Force One	Harrison Ford
Sydney Bristow	Alias	Jennifer Garner
Cpl. Dwayne Hicks	Aliens	Michael Biehn
Ellen Ripley	Aliens	Sigorney Weaver
Pvt. Hudson	Aliens	Bill Paxton
Pvt. Vasquez	Aliens	Jenette Goldstein
Ash	Army of Darkness	Bruce Campbell
Batman	Batman (1989)	Michael Keaton
Batman	Batman Begins	Christian Bale
Lt. Starbuck	Battlestar Galactica (1978)	Dirk Benedict
Kara 'Starbuck' Thrace	Battlestar Galactica (2004)	Katee Sackhoff
Beowulf	Beowulf	Ray Winstone
Jack Burton	Big Trouble in Little China	Kurt Russell
Frank Dux	Bloodsport	Jean-Claude Van Damme
Seeley Booth	Bones	David Boreanaz
William Wallace	Braveheart	Mel Gibson
Max Cady	Cape Fear (1962)	Robert Mitchum
Max Cady	Cape Fear (1991)	Robert DeNiro
Nicky Santoro	Casino	Joe Pesci
James Bond	Casino Royale	Daniel Craig
Alex Munday	Charlie's Angels (2000)	Lucy Liu
Dylan Sanders	Charlie's Angels (2000)	Drew Barrymore
Natalie Cook	Charlie's Angels (2000)	Cameron Diaz
John Matrix	Commando	Arnold Schwarzenegger
Conan	Conan the Barbarian	Arnold Schwarzenegger
John Spartan	Demolition Man	Sylvester Stallone
Simon Phoenix	Demolition Man	Wesley Snipes
John McClane	Die Hard	Bruce Willis
El Mariachi	El Mariachi	Carlos Gallardo
Lee	Enter the Dragon	Bruce Lee
John Preston	Equilibrium	Christian Bale
Snake Plissken	Escape From New York	Kurt Russell
Tyler Durden	Fight Club	Brad Pitt
Jayne	Firefly	Adam Baldwin
Malcolm Reynolds	Firefly	Nathan Fillian
River	Firefly	Summer Glau
Gunnery Sergeant Hartman	Full Metal Jacket	R. Lee Ermey
Turanga Leela	Futurama	Katey Segal (voice)
Maximus	Gladiator	Russell Crowe
James Bond	Goldfinger	Sean Connery
Tommy DeVito	Goodfellas	Joe Pesci
Martin Q. Blank	Grosse Point Blank	John Cusack
Hondo Lane	Hondo	John Wayne
Captain Steven Hiller	Independence Day	Will Smith
Quint	Jaws	Robert Shaw
The Bride	Kill Bill	Uma Thurman
Lara Croft	Lara Croft: Tomb Raider	Angelina Jolie
Sgt. Martin Riggs	Lethal Weapon	Mel Gibson
Big Chris	Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels	Vinnie Jones
Sayid Jarrah	Lost	Naveen Andrews
Agent J	Men in Black	Will Smith
Nick Fury	Nick Fury: Agent of S.H.I.E.L.D.	David Hasselhoff
Anton Chigurh	No Country for Old Men	Javier Bardem
Ting	Ong Bak: The Thai Warrior	Tony Jaa
John Cutter	Passenger 57	Wesley Snipes
Dutch	Predator	Arnold Schwarzenegger
Butch Coolidge	Pulp Fiction	Bruce Willis
Jules Winnfield	Pulp Fiction	Samuel L. Jackson
Indiana Jones	Raiders of the Lost Ark	Harrison Ford
John Rambo	Rambo: First Blood Part II	Sylvester Stallone
Jed Eckert	Red Dawn	Patrick Swayze
Mr. Blonde	Reservoir Dogs	Michael Madsen
James Dalton	Road House	Patrick Swayze
Rocky Balboa	Rocky II	Sylvester Stallone
Ivan Drago	Rocky IV	Dolph Lundgren
Keung	Rumble in the Bronx	Jackie Chan
Sgt. John M. Stryker	Sands of Iwo Jima	John Wayne
Captain John H. Miller	Saving Private Ryan	Tom Hanks
Tony Montana	Scarface	Al Pacino
John Shaft	Shaft (1971)	Richard Roundtree
Dwight	Sin City	Clive Owen
Marv	Sin City	Mickey Rourke
Miho	Sin City	Devon Aoki
Neville Flynn	Snakes on a Plane	Samuel L. Jackson
Bullet-Tooth Toney	Snatch	Vinnie Jones
James T. Kirk	Star Trek (TOS)	William Shatner
Han Solo	Star Wars	Harrison Ford
Sarah Connor	Terminator 2: Judgment Day	Linda Hamilton
B.A. Baracus	The A-Team	Mr. T
Jason Bourne	The Bourne Identity	Matt Damon
Major Reisman	The Dirty Dozen	Lee Marvin
Korben Dallas	The Fifth Element	Bruce Willis
Leeloo	The Fifth Element	Milla Jovovich
Sonny Corleone	The Godfather	James Caan
Vito Corleone	The Godfather II	Robert DeNiro
Blondie	The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly	Clint Eastwood
Captain Hilts	The Great Escape	Steve McQueen
Britt	The Magnificent Seven	James Coburn
Chris Adams	The Magnificent Seven	Yul Brynner
Vin	The Magnificent Seven	Steve McQueen
Benjamin Martin	The Patriot	Mel Gibson
Fezzik	The Princess Bride	Andre the Giant
Westley	The Princess Bride	Cary Elwes
Leon	The Professional	Jean Reno
Frank Castle	The Punisher	Thomas Jane
Mad Max Rockatansky	The Road Warrior	Mel Gibson
Kikuchiyo	The Seven Samurai	Toshiro Mifune
Vic Mackey	The Shield	Michael Chiklis
Hannibal Lecter	The Silence of the Lambs	Anthony Hopkins
Frank Martin	The Transporter	Jason Statham
Casey Ryback	Under Siege	Steven Seagal
V	V for Vendetta	Hugo Weaving
Cordell Walker	Walker, Texas Ranger	Chuck Norris
Sgt. Maj. Basil L. Plumley	We Were Soldiers	Mel Gibson
Xander Cage	xXx	Vin Diesel

Sorted by Actor

Name	Movie/TV Show	Actor
Jayne	Firefly	Adam Baldwin
Tony Montana	Scarface	Al Pacino
Fezzik	The Princess Bride	Andre the Giant
Lara Croft	Lara Croft: Tomb Raider	Angelina Jolie
Hannibal Lecter	The Silence of the Lambs	Anthony Hopkins
John Matrix	Commando	Arnold Schwarzenegger
Conan	Conan the Barbarian	Arnold Schwarzenegger
Dutch	Predator	Arnold Schwarzenegger
Pvt. Hudson	Aliens	Bill Paxton
Tyler Durden	Fight Club	Brad Pitt
Ash	Army of Darkness	Bruce Campbell
Lee	Enter the Dragon	Bruce Lee
John McClane	Die Hard	Bruce Willis
Butch Coolidge	Pulp Fiction	Bruce Willis
Korben Dallas	The Fifth Element	Bruce Willis
Natalie Cook	Charlie's Angels (2000)	Cameron Diaz
El Mariachi	El Mariachi	Carlos Gallardo
Westley	The Princess Bride	Cary Elwes
Batman	Batman Begins	Christian Bale
John Preston	Equilibrium	Christian Bale
Cordell Walker	Walker, Texas Ranger	Chuck Norris
Joe	A Fistful of Dollars	Clint Eastwood
Blondie	The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly	Clint Eastwood
Dwight	Sin City	Clive Owen
James Bond	Casino Royale	Daniel Craig
Seeley Booth	Bones	David Boreanaz
Nick Fury	Nick Fury: Agent of S.H.I.E.L.D.	David Hasselhoff
Miho	Sin City	Devon Aoki
Lt. Starbuck	Battlestar Galactica (1978)	Dirk Benedict
Ivan Drago	Rocky IV	Dolph Lundgren
Dylan Sanders	Charlie's Angels (2000)	Drew Barrymore
King Leonidas	300	Gerard Butler
President James Marshall	Air Force One	Harrison Ford
Indiana Jones	Raiders of the Lost Ark	Harrison Ford
Han Solo	Star Wars	Harrison Ford
V	V for Vendetta	Hugo Weaving
Keung	Rumble in the Bronx	Jackie Chan
Sonny Corleone	The Godfather	James Caan
Britt	The Magnificent Seven	James Coburn
Frank Martin	The Transporter	Jason Statham
Anton Chigurh	No Country for Old Men	Javier Bardem
Leon	The Professional	Jean Reno
Frank Dux	Bloodsport	Jean-Claude Van Damme
Pvt. Vasquez	Aliens	Jenette Goldstein
Sydney Bristow	Alias	Jennifer Garner
Nicky Santoro	Casino	Joe Pesci
Tommy DeVito	Goodfellas	Joe Pesci
Martin Q. Blank	Grosse Point Blank	John Cusack
Hondo Lane	Hondo	John Wayne
Sgt. John M. Stryker	Sands of Iwo Jima	John Wayne
Kara 'Starbuck' Thrace	Battlestar Galactica (2004)	Katee Sackhoff
Turanga Leela	Futurama	Katey Segal (voice)
Jack Bauer	24	Keifer Sutherland
Jack Burton	Big Trouble in Little China	Kurt Russell
Snake Plissken	Escape From New York	Kurt Russell
Major Reisman	The Dirty Dozen	Lee Marvin
Sarah Connor	Terminator 2: Judgment Day	Linda Hamilton
Alex Munday	Charlie's Angels (2000)	Lucy Liu
Jason Bourne	The Bourne Identity	Matt Damon
William Wallace	Braveheart	Mel Gibson
Sgt. Martin Riggs	Lethal Weapon	Mel Gibson
Benjamin Martin	The Patriot	Mel Gibson
Mad Max Rockatansky	The Road Warrior	Mel Gibson
Sgt. Maj. Basil L. Plumley	We Were Soldiers	Mel Gibson
Cpl. Dwayne Hicks	Aliens	Michael Biehn
Vic Mackey	The Shield	Michael Chiklis
Batman	Batman (1989)	Michael Keaton
Mr. Blonde	Reservoir Dogs	Michael Madsen
Marv	Sin City	Mickey Rourke
Leeloo	The Fifth Element	Milla Jovovich
B.A. Baracus	The A-Team	Mr. T
Malcolm Reynolds	Firefly	Nathan Fillian
Sayid Jarrah	Lost	Naveen Andrews
Jed Eckert	Red Dawn	Patrick Swayze
James Dalton	Road House	Patrick Swayze
Gunnery Sergeant Hartman	Full Metal Jacket	R. Lee Ermey
Beowulf	Beowulf	Ray Winstone
John Shaft	Shaft (1971)	Richard Roundtree
Max Cady	Cape Fear (1991)	Robert DeNiro
Vito Corleone	The Godfather II	Robert DeNiro
Max Cady	Cape Fear (1962)	Robert Mitchum
Quint	Jaws	Robert Shaw
Maximus	Gladiator	Russell Crowe
Jules Winnfield	Pulp Fiction	Samuel L. Jackson
Neville Flynn	Snakes on a Plane	Samuel L. Jackson
James Bond	Goldfinger	Sean Connery
Ellen Ripley	Aliens	Sigorney Weaver
Captain Hilts	The Great Escape	Steve McQueen
Vin	The Magnificent Seven	Steve McQueen
Casey Ryback	Under Siege	Steven Seagal
River	Firefly	Summer Glau
John Spartan	Demolition Man	Sylvester Stallone
John Rambo	Rambo: First Blood Part II	Sylvester Stallone
Rocky Balboa	Rocky II	Sylvester Stallone
Frank Castle	The Punisher	Thomas Jane
Captain John H. Miller	Saving Private Ryan	Tom Hanks
Ting	Ong Bak: The Thai Warrior	Tony Jaa
Kikuchiyo	The Seven Samurai	Toshiro Mifune
The Bride	Kill Bill	Uma Thurman
Xander Cage	xXx	Vin Diesel
Big Chris	Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels	Vinnie Jones
Bullet-Tooth Toney	Snatch	Vinnie Jones
Simon Phoenix	Demolition Man	Wesley Snipes
John Cutter	Passenger 57	Wesley Snipes
Captain Steven Hiller	Independence Day	Will Smith
Agent J	Men in Black	Will Smith
James T. Kirk	Star Trek (TOS)	William Shatner
Chris Adams	The Magnificent Seven	Yul Brynner

Ultimate Movie and TV Badass Tournament

Fri, 01 Feb 2008 22:18:39 GMT

I think it's time for another whodwinafight tournament. Last year's King of Beasts was pretty fun. Let's do something like that again.

So who's the ultimate movie/TV badass? Who could kick the ass of all the rest? I'm opening the floor for nominations, and then I'll pick the best 2^n choices and put them in a bracket, much like last year's King of Beasts tournament.

A couple of rules:

1. Humans with no superpowers only. There doesn't seem to be much point discussing what would happen if Rambo fought Superman, Dumbledore, or Optimus Prime. (Although I'd watch a movie about Rambo fighting the T-1000.) But comic-book style characters without superpowers are fine.

2. Feel free to nominate multiple incarnations of the same character if they're different enough. For example, the Connery and Craig James Bonds should probably both be in the tournament. Ditto with the Keaton and Bale Batmans.

3. Try to avoid characters that are nearly identical. Can you tell the difference between John Matrix (Commando) and Dutch (Predator)? Because I can't.

4. Heroes, villains, and supporting characters are all fine.

Make your nominations in comments, and feel free to argue over other people's suggestions.

Here are some of my nominations:

- James Bond (Connery)
- James Bond (Craig)
- Batman (Keaton)
- Batman (Bale)
- John Matrix or Dutch (I'm open to either one. Argue for one or the other in comments)
- Vic Mackey
- John McClane
- John Rambo
- Jack Bauer
- B.A. Baracus
- Gunnery Sergeant Hartman (Full Metal Jacket)
- Frank Castle (The Punisher)
- Ellen Ripley or Hicks or Hudson or Vasquez (convince me which is best)
- James T Kirk
- Hannibal Lecter
- Frank Martin (The Transporter)
- Big Chris (Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels) or Bullet Tooth Tony (Snatch)
- Major Reisman (The Dirty Dozen)
- Blondie (The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly) or Joe (A Fistful of Dollars)
- Kikuchiyo (The Seven Samurai)
- Han Solo
- Indiana Jones
- Walker, Texas Ranger (Note that he doesn't get any Chuck Norris superpowers)
- Jason Bourne

This list is just based on my thinking of names for 10 minutes. I'm sure there are some obvious people missing, so don't berate me with, "How could you leave off [insert badass here]?" That's why I'm asking other people to submit their nominations. Also, if you think any of my suggestions are pussies, go ahead and argue why.

And is anyone interested in actually running this tournament? I've had a lot more work to do at work lately, so I don't know if I'll have to time to post about it every day.

Jeri Thompson vs. Elizabeth Kucinich

Tue, 15 Jan 2008 23:19:25 GMT

It's the showdown of trophy wives of Presidential candidates!

vs.

View Poll: Candidate's Wives

Note that these are just the women fighting without help from their husbands. So these facts about Fred Thompson won't come into play.

Twenty Lions vs. an Elephant

Wed, 19 Dec 2007 19:24:16 GMT

Find out who wins here:

Martin Luther King, Jr. vs Gandhi

Sun, 16 Dec 2007 19:52:01 GMT

Let's do the converse: who's a bigger pacifist?

George Clooney vs. Fabio

Thu, 08 Nov 2007 18:07:10 GMT

They got into a "scuffle" over the weekend, but who would win an all-out fight?

vs.

Clooney is 46*, Fabio is 48.

View Poll: #1085223

* Huh. I really thought Clooney was older than that, but Wikipedia doesn't lie, except for when it frequently does.

Who's Funnier?

Thu, 04 Oct 2007 02:36:26 GMT

Who's funnier, Jon Stewart or Stephen Colbert?

Octopus vs. Mr Potato Head

Wed, 05 Sep 2007 05:16:13 GMT

Apparently the octopus wins.

Lions vs Water Buffalo vs Crocodile

Sat, 02 Jun 2007 06:31:34 GMT

In case anyone's interested, a really awesome beast vs beast vs beast video.

Fri, 01 Jun 2007 13:26:14 GMT

Hi! Interesting community. phanatic suggested that I should post this here:

From this otherwise uninteresting article:

On being asked whether he threw the towel in too soon in the 2000 presidential elections, where he narrowly lost to Bush, Gore said he had taken the fight as far as he could, and the only other option left was a "violent revolution".

"I took it all the way to a final Supreme Court decision. And in our system, there is no intermediate step between a final Supreme Court decision and violent revolution. So, at that point, having taken it as far as one could, then the question becomes, are we going to be a nation of laws and not people?" Gore replied.

"Do I support the rule of law, even though I disagree with the Supreme Court's decision? I did disagree with it, and I think that those of us who disagreed with it will have the better of the argument in history," he added.

This made me wonder: who would win a Democratic "violent revolution"? Republicans have more guns and probably more military skill, but Democrats are more numerous, meaner, and control more industrial areas.

I think it would be fun to find out, in part because, as a libertarian, I can shoot everybody.

King of Beasts Final: White Rhino vs. Colossal Squid

Mon, 14 May 2007 17:18:15 GMT

vs.

White Rhino
6600 pounds
6 feet tall, 14 feet long
2 foot long horn
First Round: Defeated Deinonychus (Velociraptor) 17-8 (68%)
Second Round: Defeated Hippopotamus 17-6 (74%)
Third Round: Defeated Liger 16-9 (64%)

Colossal Squid
1000 pounds
46 feet long
Swiveling hooks at the end of each tentacle
Largest beak in the animal kingdom
First Round: Defeated Tiger Shark 21-4 (84%)
Second Round: Defeated Walrus 14-9 (61%)
Third Round: Defeated African Cape Buffalo 10-4 (71%)

Rules of the match:
The squid can fly and breathe through the air exactly as if it is water, except that it can only move in two dimensions. It must remain a foot above the ground, so it can't move above the rhino's reach. The rhino moves normally.

View Poll: King of Beasts: Final Match

Black Widow vs. Scorpion

Mon, 14 May 2007 16:38:52 GMT

http://geekologie.com/2007/04/scorpion_vs_black_widow.php

Fri, 11 May 2007 17:55:20 GMT

Vic Mackey vs. Tony Soprano

Edit: Okay, everyone seems to be assuming this is a steel cage match. I guess that's my fault for not specifying. But I'm not just talking about Vic and Tony going at it Thunderdome-style. I'm thinking more of an existential conflict where each gets to use all the tools and skills at their disposal to take the other guy out, and to avoid being taken out.

Fri, 20 Apr 2007 14:16:44 GMT

This is like watching a slap-flight between a couple of retarded kids:

Fur Seal vs. Penguin

A lion vs. 50 unarmed men

Mon, 16 Apr 2007 18:25:11 GMT

50 random dudes are snatched off the street, shoved into a room with a male lion, and told that they won't be allowed to leave until either the lion kills all of them or they kill the lion. The room is large enough for everyone (including the lion) to move freely, but not large enough for anyone to run away or hide.

The people don't have any sort of weapons, combat training, or expertise, and simply have to use their intelligence to come up with a way to hurt the lion. The humans are defined as winning if any of them survive.

Who wins?

View Poll: 50 men vs. a lion