vorkosiverse: In the safe house Gregor and Laisa

laisa1 (

laisa1) wrote in

vorkosiverse,
@ 2006-07-25 16:45:00

Entry tags:

gregor, laisa

In the safe house Gregor and Laisa
continues from http://community.livejournal.com/vorconsole/2087.html?view=18983#t18983

As the connection closed she turned to Gregor, buring her head in his chest and wept.

(Post a new comment)

gregor_v
2006-07-25 05:40 pm UTC (link)

Gregor felt a bit wrung out, but still held Laisa. Any reassurances he could give her would be conditional...

Laisa looked like she needed to rest more than anything. Gregor eased her down onto the bed, never letting go of her. He pulled her down and spooned around her, and tried to ignore some rather obvious signs of what he might like to have happen next. Not now. We need her back, first.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

	laisa1 2006-07-26 12:12 am UTC (link)
	After a while the storm abaited. Laisa became calmer, and lolled against Gregor, feeling drained and pathetic. "I...I know it's not worth asking if we can go back, is it?" she whispered to him, sounding not at all hopeful. (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

gregor_v
2006-07-26 03:12 am UTC (link)

"No, it isn't. It's terribly cruel of me to say that, but please remember that I want to be with the children right now too... but I can't. And you can't. I think they are in the best possible hands, besides ours. They are someplace safe and familiar to them, they are surrounded by people who love them as children, who don't just see them as Imperial Heirs. Xav especially needs that right now."

Gregor leaned in and kissed the back of Laisa's neck. "I love you, remember."

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

	laisa1 2006-07-26 10:57 am UTC (link)
	Laisa shuffled around to face him. "I love you back. And I know you want to be there too. I wasn't trying to make this all about me." She held his face in her hands, and kissed him gently. "You know sometimes, just sometimes, I really hate the Emperor." (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

gregor_v
2006-07-26 04:11 pm UTC (link)

Gregor gave Laisa a small smile. "Well, you know, sometimes I hate the Emperor too. You know I didn't ask for this, I'd be happier probably as a university professor, or a farmer, or lots of other things." He thought of Lord Auditor Professor Vorthys, one of the men he most admired from the older generation. The man had seen the best and worst of Barrayar, and served it honorably, yet kept his sense of humor and proportion.

"In the meantime... we have this little bit of time here, and I'd rather not wallow in misery." He slipped his hands up the back of Laisa's scrub shirt, working them over her tense muscles. And kissed her again and again, and hoped for the best.

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

laisa1
2006-07-27 08:48 am UTC (link)

Laisa nestled into his arms, as his hands traced a pattern on her back. She kissed him back tasting him and enjoying the sweetness of his mouth.

"Mmmmm" she sighed into his mouth.

She moved her mouth down to his neck and kissed him tenderly, breathing in. He smelt of the strange soap, rather than his normal toiletries, and she wibbled for a second wanting everything to be normal, everything to be right.

"Misery is so over-rated." she mumbled into his skin, and allowed herself to just be here and now, without thinking about the children and where they all were.

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

gregor_v
2006-07-27 09:17 pm UTC (link)

"Shirts are over-rated too, you know," Gregor said with a grin. He stripped off his own shirt and helped Laisa with hers. And let himself relax into her warmth, and let go -- almost -- the Imperium's concerns.

I need this woman so much, and Barrayar needs her babies -- the ones like Kareen, fierce and brave and forward-thinking... He sighed and moved his head down, away from her face.

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

laisa1
2006-07-27 10:22 pm UTC (link)

Gregor lips moving across Laisa's skin made her skin come alive. She casually ran her fingers through his hair. Her back arched towards him, presenting herself for his caresses.

Oh, yes please, I remember this, I remember feeling this much joy. The bloody empire can sod off if it thinks it's going to separate us from now on.

She reached down for his chin, and pulled his mouth to hers to kiss him, then let go.

"You're good. I kind of remember that, but I'd glad you're reminding me."

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

	imp_sec 2006-07-27 11:22 pm UTC (link)
	The comm chimed. Gregor sighed in exasperation and reached over to key it on, audio only. "Sire, Dr. Petrovin has arrived, and is ready to examine Your Imperial Highnesses." (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

	laisa1 2006-07-27 11:27 pm UTC (link)
	Laisa groaned, and pushed Gregor away reaching for her shirt. "Get rid of him quickly" her voice was thick like treacle. (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

gregor_v
2006-07-28 12:19 am UTC (link)

Gregor stood up and put on his shirt before heading out of the room. He shook his head over Laisa. First she'd insisted on the doctor coming to examine him, and now she wanted him to go away. Though Gregor was feeling more in control of himself, he knew she'd been right in the first place. He needed to talk to the good doctor, and then do other things with his wife.

He opened the door to the front room, and invited Dr. Petrovin, who was carrying a large box, inside. "The Empress will be here in a moment. Please have a seat." He gestured to one of three chairs clustered in front of the fireplace.

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

laisa1
2006-07-28 07:48 am UTC (link)

Laisa pulled her shirt over her head, and glanced in the mirror, then pulled her hair back and tied it in a knot.

Be sensible, this has to happen. You want this to happen, Gregor needs it. Aw but, that was just getting interesting!

She leant against the door for a second or two until her blushes subsided, and the went through into the living room.

"Doctor, thank you so much for coming, and I'm so sorry that you were delayed waiting for the things we'd requested."

She held out her hands for the box.

"Let me take that off you. Do you want me here whilst you talk or not?" she glanced at Gregor.

OOC Leaving shortly for Continuuuum, I will have the laptop but responses will be patchy at best. Laisa will sit quietly in the corner if you want her there, or she'll go in the kitchen.

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

	dr_petrovin 2006-07-28 12:28 pm UTC (link)
	"It was no trouble at all, your Highness. I think I would like to examine you both separately first, if that is acceptable, Sire?" He looked at the Emperor with concern showing plainly on his face. General Allegre had expressed some very serious concerns about the Emperor's mental state. (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

gregor_v
2006-07-28 03:09 pm UTC (link)

"I will go with what you recommend, Doctor, though you'll want Laisa to fill in some of the details eventually."

Gregor got back up and went over to Laisa, who was clearly loathe to leave him. "Darling, maybe you can take the box into the bedroom and unpack it. I suspect there's something in there you really ne-- want, right about now." He touched Laisa's ring-finger lightly, and relished the momentary sensation. If the doctor hadn't been watching them so acutely, he would have licked that finger, maybe even taken it into his mouth completely. "When you're done, please, please lie down for a little rest. We'll get you when we need you."

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

	laisa1 2006-07-31 10:57 am UTC (link)
	Laisa smiled at him, and shook her head a little. "I'll wait for you to put it on my love." she whispered. She went off into the kitchen leaving the two men together and shut the door behind her. (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

	dr_petrovin 2006-07-31 02:49 pm UTC (link)
	Once the Empress left the room, the doctor began to examine the Emperor. After he had concluded a basic physical exam, he asked, "Sire, you appear physically unharmed. ImpSec had already determined this, of course. Was there anything else you specifically wished to discuss with me?" (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

	gregor_v 2006-08-01 04:13 pm UTC (link)
	Nothing I want to discuss, but perhaps things I should... Gregor felt very nervous, but if anyone could set his fears to rest, it was Dr. Petrovin. "Sir, I am not sure where to start. I had... well, in the mess in the Residence Gardens, I ..." He stopped. This was going to be harder than he thought. Maybe the good doctor would ask him the right question? (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

	dr_petrovin 2006-08-04 01:30 pm UTC (link)
	The doctor considered carefully how to prod the Emperor to continue. "What went through your mind when you first found Lady Alys and Captain Illyan, Sire?" (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

gregor_v
2006-08-04 05:59 pm UTC (link)

"I just wasn't expecting it at all, not that anyone would. Laisa and I were seeking out that gazebo for a little, um, privacy. We were anticipating good things."

"The last... normal thing I remember doing is calling ImpSec. Though I guess that's not so normal. And I was really angry -- furious, about as much as I ever have been -- that Yet Another Crisis was stealing the time that Laisa and I finally had. I think a little bit of the old fear, about my father's, um, mental problems got mixed in there. And then... well, things got very, very strange."

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

	dr_petrovin 2006-08-04 09:30 pm UTC (link)
	"Strange in what way?" (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

gregor_v
2006-08-04 09:41 pm UTC (link)

"It is hard to describe... I got kind of detached at first, like I was outside my own body. And then when I thought they were taking Laisa away, I... well, I remembered my mother, and sort of had a flashback, I guess. It was so chaotic I can barely remember more."

Gregor really didn't want to give any more details... This was his trusted doctor, but insane Emperors were not something the man was used to dealing with.

(Reply to this) (Parent)

	gregor_v 2006-08-04 09:54 pm UTC (link)
	Then he had a sudden inspiration. "So, Dr. Petrovin, what have you heard about what happened to me?" Please, please take this bait... (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

dr_petrovin
2006-08-05 03:25 am UTC (link)

The doctor pondered just how much to say.

"I heard some rather conflicting stories, Sire. That you were seen crying, or perhaps laughing, and making some rather ... interesting comments about the decontamination process. Also that ... you seemed to be treating your retreat to a safe house as a sort of vacation, as though you did not, perhaps, quite grasp the seriousness of the situation. I found most of the reports hard to credit, Sire."

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

gregor_v
2006-08-05 04:18 am UTC (link)

"Well, all of those things are true...." Gregor watched as Dr. Petrovin began looking rather alarmed. In a macabre sort of way, it was funny -- or would be for a little while, at least, until the good Doctor pulled out the sedatives...

"... but rather lacking in context."

He sighed. "So, yes, I cried; that was during the height of the flashback, and I did go rather blank when it happened. And yes, I laughed, mostly over how absurd the situation was -- after I was 'back in my own head' so to speak. But I didn't laugh much, because although I knew I was going to be OK, it alarmed the people around me. Same with the comments just before we went into decon. If you had been there, you might have understood why it was so funny that, after spending all that afternoon with Laisa and I trying to, um, get some time alone, we were going to be shoved naked into the decon unit... and not even be able to touch each other." He laughed a little bit at the memory. That poor ImpSec guard...

"I suppose that if I ever do go mad, it will be the laughing sort of mad."

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

	dr_petrovin 2006-08-06 04:06 pm UTC (link)
	The doctor leaned back and tapped a light-pen against his lips. "No, Sire, not mad. Given context, your Highness' reactions to events seem to be quite normal responses and coping mechanisms." He thought another moment. "My concern now is whether those coping mechanisms will continue to be adequate if the situation deteriorates further." (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

gregor_v
2006-08-06 07:57 pm UTC (link)

Once again, Gregor knew why he liked Dr. Petrovin so much. The man was forthright and didn't spook easily.

"Well, I am glad to hear that someone can label that scene in the gardens 'normal.' Though if you'd been there, I am not so sure you would have."

The second part of this was much more difficult. "You know, this is not the first time I've had a flashback. There have been... maybe two or three others. What they have in common is being triggered by a sudden shock having to do with the loss of family. Simon and Alys certainly count as family to me; they are not just 'subjects' who happen to be staffers. And every time, ImpSec has provided cover for me, just as they did today." It all felt slightly evasive, but Gregor was too well-trained to air his doubts about his capability to be Emperor... except to Laisa.

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

	dr_petrovin 2006-08-06 10:38 pm UTC (link)
	"That is ImpSec's job, Sire," said the doctor. "That is just another aspect of watching over your safety." (Reply to this) (Parent)

gregor_v
2006-08-07 02:39 pm UTC (link)

ooc reply to the comment at the bottom of the thread.

"And ImpSec does a very good job with this circus, most of the time." Gregor was thinking of the earlier, abbreviated stop at the base in Vormurtos' District. It wasn't exactly ImpSec's fault that he and Laisa had been sent there, but they should have known. No, Miles should have told me that Vormurtos was compromised sooner!

"It's not that I really think that flashbacks interfere with my ability to do my job as Emperor. They are short, and unpleasant, but I recover quickly. It's more the perception that they interfere. Imagine, for example, if I had a flashback in the middle of the Emperor's Birthday Ceremony!"

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

	dr_petrovin 2006-08-14 02:30 am UTC (link)
	"I don't suppose that is very likely, Sire," the doctor replied. "To have such a flashback when a similar event triggers it is one thing. Unless you have had others, that did not have such evident triggers, I do not think it is anything to be worried about generally." (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

	gregor_v 2006-08-14 03:53 am UTC (link)
	"The trigger has always been fairly obvious, but only afterwards. I suppose I can't really avoid possible triggers without locking myself up away from everyone! And talk about somnething that would make me mad...." (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

	dr_petrovin 2006-08-14 11:50 am UTC (link)
	"No, no, that would not do at all, Sire," the doctor said. "I will give you some tablets that will help you sleep, if you find you are unable to do so, but I think that is all you will need. You are not mad." (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

gregor_v
2006-08-14 05:48 pm UTC (link)

Gregor thought, given how tired he was all of a sudden, that he would not need sleeping tablets, but he accepted them anyway, just in case.

He could smell the odors of cooking coming from the little kitchen, which reminded him that he hadn't eaten anything since lunch, many hours ago now. "I think that perhaps we should go join Laisa in the kitchen. She has her own set of concerns that you might be able to help with."

ooc: now we can carry on in the new thread S. started, OK?

(Reply to this) (Parent)

	gregor_v 2006-08-07 02:41 pm UTC (link)
	"Oh, and I forgot to tell you. One of the things Laisa and I were planning, before we discovered Simon and Alys, was a retreat for a day or two to this very cabin. It was such a wonderful idea, but now that we are here involuntarily, I am not sure that Laisa's really capable of enjoying herself. She is very worried about the children." (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

	dr_petrovin 2006-08-14 02:31 am UTC (link)
	"I imagine she is. Have you had the opportunity to speak with them since you arrived?" (Reply to this) (Parent)

Username:		Create an Account Forgot your login or password? Login w/ OpenID
Password:
	Remember Me
	English • Español • Deutsch • Русский…

About

Help

Get Involved

Legal

Store

LJ Labs