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In celebration, have some Mitch Benn:

1. Does anyone localish fancy dogsitting while we are at Spring Conference? This would be from the morning of the 6th of March to the evening of the 8th of March. We actually arranged a dogsitter for Conference well before Christmas, but due to a shotgun wedding in (I think) Suffolk it's all gone horribly awry. I reserve the right to reject volunteers out of hand, but the fact of volunteering will be much appreciated. Volunteer Obtained!


2. Does anyone else here feel sick to their stomachs about this? Because there seems to be a BIT of fuss being made, but not much. Our government is complicit in torture, people. TORTURE. Why are we not throwing these bastards out on their ears? I just don't get it.


3. Does anyone have a gateau from a chateau? Because, given the way the wax has run when it has dribbled, we now have a candle with a handle, and I can do a passable impression of the Fallen Madonna with the Big Boobies by Van Klomp...

In other news, Mitch Benn has been musing about the age of Radio Four listeners. I think it's possible that the average age of radio four listeners is 55, but that the standard deviation is very big indeed. But still, straw poll is strawy:

Poll #1351338 Radio Four Listeners
Open to: All, detailed results viewable to: All

Do you listen to Radio Four?

If you answered yes, above, what age bracket do you fall into?

This post has inspired a reply posting from Mr Benn (and no, of course I don't mind you linking, silly goose) in which he explains his reasons for not having comments enabled. This post is my stream-of-consciousness reaction (it's all getting a bit Meta, this, isn't it?)

They are perfectly understandable reasons. I suspect it's possible that I hang around political blogs too much, and my views are therefore coloured by that experience, but there is a commonly held view that a blog which does not allow comments somehow doesn't count as a blog (Y HALLO THAR MS DORRIES!) and because I fall into the category of People Who Think Mitch Is Awesome, I don't want his blog to not count. But, as Mitch quite rightly points out, his blog is not that of a politician, whom we have a right to expect accountability from, but that of a creative artist, who can do what he pleases with regard to accountability. And I can understand the urge to have a safe space, which is why I have this blog, which is public, but also my friends-only, no-you-can't-read-it personal blog, which tends to get higher readership figures even though mostly it is just aggregated twitter updates these days.

The thing is... Even though I know that if I see something which interests me on Mitch's blog I can send him an email, or a Facebook message, or whatever, and he will see it, I'd quite like to have discussions with other Mitch fans about his posts too. And I think it would be nice, from a promoting Mitch point of view, if a community of kinds could be built - other than just me and innerbrat bugging the poor bloke constantly. And I quite often DO see something interesting on Mitch's blog. By virtue of the fact that I do the netcast for LC (plug, plug), and I try to read everyone who reads me, my reading list is HUGE. It is separated into stuff I read if I have time and stuff I always read without fail. Mitch is one of the few people I don't know on a personal level who falls into the latter category - for contrast, GNeil is in the stuff I read if I have time list.

It would be possible to enable comments only from registered commenters, perhaps? And then people who are nasty could be easily barred from commenting. And yet, this would be an administrative burden on Mitch; also, I get the feeling that he is the kind of man who would feel bad about wielding the BanHammer against individuals, and would guilt-trip himself about it, whereas this way feels fairer. So a possible solution might be (and I make this as a hopeful suggestion, not with any expectation of an answer other than no) to enable comments from registered commenters and appoint a moderator?

Anyway, at the end of the day, all things considered, *insert further cliches here*, the fact remains that, comments or no comments, Mitch's blog has lots of people reading it who LIKE reading pointless whimsy and bollocking on about Doctor Who, which was the point of me posting the poll in the first place, to reassure him that his readership likes what he posts. And I feel fairly guilty about having caused a small degree of angst and self-examination.

* is really really bad at this fangirl thing *

Mat and I read this morning's entry, and said in unison but I LIKE reading about Mitch's views on Doctor Who...! However, we recognise that we may not be in the majority. Therefore, a poll:

Poll #1327448 Mitch Benn's blog
Open to: All, detailed results viewable to: None

When I navigate towards Mitch Benn's blog, I want to see:

Happy birthday to one of my longest-standing and most thoughtful friends, veritasema (hope you get lots of snuggles from the young ones today); and also to our eternally youthful Youth and Equalities Spokesman Lynne Featherstone. I often look at the picture of Lynne on her blog and wonder what the portrait in the attic must look like...

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The Now Show was gigglesome indeed this week, and I share with Mitch the urge to prevent the X-Factor butchery getting the Christmas number one spot. If you want to join in on this, now is the time to join in the world's biggest RickRoll. Go forth and buy Rick Astley before the end of today. Fly, my brave f-list! Fly to iTunes!

ETA: as Mat points out in the comments, buying Jeff Buckley, as noble as that may seem, still contributes money to the Cowellmeister, because he owns the rights. Buy Rick! I have! You know it makes sense:

7DIGITAL
(Remember to click track#1 ONLY)
http://www.7digital.com/artists/rick-astley/whenever-you-need-somebody/
OR text TRACK to 78789. You will receive a 7digital voucher code - enter this in the voucher area below the basket on this page.


iTUNES
(you'll need iTunes installed on your computer - click BUY SONG on track#1)
http://itunes.apple.com/WebObjects/MZStore.woa/wa/viewAlbum?i=255991760&id=255991758&s=143444


PLAY.COM
(tick track#1 in the orange section)
http://www.play.com/Music/MP3-Download-Album/4-/8065711/3-Originals/Product.html

TESCO DIGITAL
(Again, click on track#1)
http://www.tescodigital.com/Store/Pages/ProductDetail.aspx?mode=Albums&product=2%3a2900355

TUNETRIBE
(it's WMA but 49p - BE CAREFUL it's not the first track?)
http://www.tunetribe.com/product/index.html?id=245580

... is fantastic, and I urge you all to go and listen to it RIGHT NOW. I am very cheered by Mitch's pointing out of the fact that on a wet, cold, windy Yorkshire Tuesday, Huddersfield Town can pull in more punters than the entire membership of the BNP. Piratey people will be very pleased by it also, I feel.

Another thing which is incredibly cool is this (small: hat-tip gominokouhai):



* totally wants a Pizza of Rassilon now *

Because I know Mitch will dig it, I'll be tagging him on Facebook.

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Poll #1305902 Snacking
Open to: All, detailed results viewable to: All

Three bowls of Sugar Puffs is enough, really, isn't it?

... who just bought himself a BMW, despite my best entreaties over the phone*: Mitch Benn on BMWs...

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* Jon has rung me for purchase advice a couple of times now. It seems that if he really wants to buy something expensive, he has to ring me and get me to try and dissuade him from making the purchase before he can actually take the plunge and buy it. This is, obviously, a perfectly reasonable attitude for a Liberal. The din of truth colliding with error and all that.

For Will: the blogging discussion on the Today programme, which is hilarious in its illumination of John Humphries as a technophobic dinosaur, bless him.

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burkesworks? I saw this and thought of you. Ten Very Good reasons to grow a beard. I am almost tempted to try...

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Can this be true? Are they finally going to make proper sex education compulsory? I am astounded that there are people who think that kids should not be taught about contraception till they are at least 13 though. I had lost my virginity by then, and I wasn't the first in my class either. Teenage pregnancies are better than talking to children about condoms, are they? I mean, we all know abstinence education doesn't work - largely for parallel reasons to those Mitch Benn talks about with regard to smoking today:

the greatest trick the tobacco corporations ever pulled was convincing parents to tell their kids not to smoke. That made sure that smoking became identified with rebellion and independence for ever.

The more adults tell teenagers not to do something, the more they are going to want to do it. What you have to do is present them with evidence of what the consequences will be and let them make their own choice - but make sure they know they will be living with the consequences - Mitch again:

"Hi kid, here's the plan. You give me a regular cash donation of a few pounds each day, and in return I will make you smell bad, slowly destroy your skin, reduce your fitness, turn your teeth and fingers brown and fill your whole system with toxins. In return for this, you will think you look a bit cool. Except you won't really. Oh, and I reserve the right, at some point in the future, to kill you. Maybe I won't and maybe I will. You'll never know until it's too late. It might be swift and unexpected, it might take months of agonising pain. Do we have a deal?"

I'm hoping that if I put it like that and tell my kids that if they still want to smoke, it's up to them, they'll steer clear of it.

Giving kids an informed choice doesn't ALWAYS work, but it for damn sure works better than being an authoritarian arsehole and just making them want to rebel.

Actually, our dear government could do with bearing that in mind, too...

Anyway, I know (and am happy) that there is some form of sex education going on at Shrubby's school, because the other day she told me that she knew about how babies happen. She said that I have to do something with Mat (she was hazy about this bit) and then I'll get really fat, and then I'll burst, and she will have a baby sister. This baby sister will either be called Ellie-Mae 2 (after her friend Ellie-Mae) or Mona, she hasn't decided. I, apparently, do not get a say.

John Scalzi has suggested, in the past and the spirit of balance, that one should post one negative thing about the candidate one is supporting, and one positive thing about the candidate one is not supporting. OK, so he was talking about the American presidential election, but I think (at the risk of being branded a mouthy blogger again) it can be applicable to the Lib Dem party presidency too...

A Positive Thing About Chandila:

Hot damn, he's gorgeous:

A Positive Thing About Lembit:

He has boundless enthusiasm for people, and has been helpful and kind to lots of people in the party when they needed help.

A Negative Thing About Ros:

She looks like the establishment candidate at this point, and that's a dangerous position to be in in an anti-establishment party

There. See? I CAN do fair and balanced. Sort of.

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The video for Mitch Benn's recent single, Sing Like an Angel, is now available on You Tube:



Featuring Rock Wankman on the piano!

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And now I am off to see Dylan Moran. Laters!

I'm late, I'm late...

Chicky Yog has a timely warning about why triumphalism over the defeat of 42 days is a bit of a pyrrhic victory. If you'll forgive the mixed mettyfor.

Himmelgarten cafe has been inspired by the 42 days debate too.

But there is good news today. One might even call it awesome news. Neil Gaiman and Mitch Benn are writing a musical together!. I don't think there's any possible way this can be out-awesomed.

Anyway, ought to get out of bed; have to be at work in 20 minutes... I am working till 7 and then have LibDemmery, so don't expect too much responsiveness today.

Mitch will be on Go 4 It on Radio Four in just over an hour, giving a masterclass in how to write funny songs.

(X-posted theyorkshergob, now_show, radio4listeners)

As Peter Black and ihavecake report, the LHC has had to be stopped for repair. This means we have to fret needlessly about other ways the world might end - alien invasion, Yellowstone Park, or asteroid strike are my favourites, but why not check out Exit Mundi for more things to make you paranoid.

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While we're in a 'pologetic mode: sorry Mitch. I am bad fangirl. I was too distracted by shiny shiny politics geekery and forgot about your diet (and, indeed, my own). I shall go and buy tickets for your tour in pennance. Although the three dates that are in travelling distance for me will all necessitate time off work... [/whinge whinge moan moan]

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Via Forceful and Moderate: McSweeney's Hamlet in Facebook news feed form:

Hamlet thinks Ophelia might be happier in a convent.

Ophelia removed "moody princes" from her interests.

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Speaking of Facebook, am still enjoying Language: English (pirate), which is selectable by all from the settin's menu. F'r'instance, an item on my newsfeed this morning:

Nick Clegg, Mark Valladares n' Richard Dominic Flowers be spied in a gallery o' paintin's.
by the brigand Helen Duffett
Amidst the Seas of: Bournemouth

It's amazing how such a small thing can cheer one up, me hearties.

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Stephen Glenn has a very amusing top ten of tips for Millibland if he wants to be more like Hesletine.

... from my earlier post about Doctor Who. innerbrat explains that:

Dr.Who fandom is in many ways the British equivalent of Star Trek- fans are universally portrayed with in a certain stereotype in the popular media, and that stereotype is always male and never flattering. If you're writing a script in the UK and had a need for a sad, lifeless, mockable geek, you go for the Whovian. Because people are never happy unless they're mocking the Others. Even the News Quiz, bless its little heart, has been known to mock them. Not the Now Show, though. If anyone dared mock Dr. Who fans on the Now Show, they'd probably regret it as soon as their head comes in contact with a guitar wielded by 21 stones of angry scouser.

I bet if it was Jon Holmes who was the Who fan, the mockery would be unceasing.

Honestly, what more could you want from a post?

;)

It's a wonderful thing on a Saturday morning to wake up blearily thinking that sounds like Vince... and discover that it is, indeed, Vince, being utterly awesome for a full half hour on Beyond Westminster. Vince was SO awesome that the BBC reporter lady kept calling him Doctor Vincent Cable in very reverent tones. I like it when Vince is shown due deference by the media.

The poor junior Labourite was utterly skewered on his Well of course we believe in localism because it's the buzzword of the moment, but we want to retain central control over this, and this and this and... oh, EVERYTHING! Even auntie Beeb's reporter mentioned that the Lib Dems have been talking about this since the sixties, and that the Labour position was incoherent. And it warmed the cockles of my heart to hear Oliver Letwin keep having to say Vince's party and my own in a covert admission that they were nicking our policies.

Tee Hee Hee.

And now Vince is on Money Box being awesome AGAIN! Radio Four is clearly The Vince Channel today. I am not complaining about this.

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Penny Red is having a similar thought process to me about her sexuality: feeling like you can't really call yourself bi if you've mostly has experiences with the opposite sex in a straight world is something that seems to be endemic among my gender and my age group at the moment. I think part of the reason I am reluctant is that, as Penny says Fourth-wave feminism encompasses a gender egalitarianism which rejects the notion of antagonistic binaries. I'm not BI sexual. I'm, like Penny, attracted to self-defined men, women, transsexuals and the ambi-gendered, excluding noone apart from wankers, pro-life campaigners and people I just don't fancy. Bisexual seems like such an inadequate word for all that.

And yet, I'd feel like a fraud adopting Captain Jack's omnisexual label, because, let's face it, I don't fancy poodles.

Rather similarly to the whole polyamorous/open relationship thing, I have yet to find terminology which I am happy with for the (very happy) relationship I have with My Lib Dem Boyfriend. In some ways, this isn't a huge problem, because I am happy to be labelless. I'm me, and Mat is Mat, and we are us, and as long as we're happy, what does it matter? But other people like labels, and it might be nice for them if we could just say yeah, we're Terrysexual (to pick a random word) and that would let people know...

And then, once we've done that, clitoris education for all!

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Speaking of Captain Jack related things, Mitch Benn and the LSO are doing a sci-fi musical extravaganza at Torchwood Towers Canary Wharf, with the VERY Captain Jack-friendly title of Twilight Delights.

I wonder if that'll be doable from Devon...

The Downing Street website that we all thought was great because it was a Wordpress install, and must therefore have been veryveryvery cheap? Cost £100,000. ONE HUNDRED THOUSAND POUNDS. For fuck's sake! I could do it at home for nothing and all I would need is a computer, and internet connection, and a small aubergine...! Now, yes, that IS cheaper than other government websites, but it's also fucking ridiculous for something on free software with a ripped-off theme.

When is this government going to get even a tiny clue about how the intertubes work? There must be at least one of them who could say hang on a minute....

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And speaking of WRONG in the government, here is a brilliant dissection of them being WRONG in respect of the citizen's equality before the law.

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They're talking about choice in schools on the radio again. Is it me, or is this the perfect example of how most politicians are trapped in the Westminster bubble? Yes, in London, it's meaningful to have a choice of schools/hospitals/post offices, etc., because there's so bloody many of them in such a relatively small space. In normal, not London places, there is ONE of each of these things, if you're lucky. You can't choose between one. You just want that one to be good.

When the government shuts things down in the name of choice and streamlining, IT IS REMOVING ESSENTIAL SERVICES FROM PEOPLE.

Bastards.

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Good news? Mitch Benn is releasing his new single on the first of September, and it has Rock Wankman on it and everything! YAY? Nay. It's frigging iTunes only. AGAIN.

* stabs Steve Jobs *

Just because you aren't Microsoft, doesn't mean that restrictive monopolisation of a market sector is GOOD, you know.

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Hmm. I appear to be rather grumpy today. Sorry 'bout that.

Don't Spoil Mitch. That is all.

Because sometimes, things conspire to make one feel a bit down, and one needs one's faith in human nature restoring. So these are the things that have made me feel warm and squishy today:



Some arseholes are trying to overturn California's lovely legalisation of gay marriage. Lots of people are not happy about the arseholes. Not rich powerful people, just ordinary people. But they want to DO something... So they band together, make an LJ community (I really love this bit of the profile: The auction will raise money for the fight against the California initiative which will legally destroy existing same-sex marriages and ban any further ones. If the initiative passes, it will write discrimination into the state constitution, annul existing marriages, and make Mr. Sulu cry. I, too, think that making Mr Sulu cry would be an unforgivable thing, and am joyous to know that I'm not alone), and offer what they can offer in order to raise money for the legal fight. It might be making stuff, it might be writing a fic, it might be anything. And bidding is open now.

It's a beautiful thing to see lots and lots of people determined to do what they can to fight intolerance and bigotry. Go, look at livelongnmarry, bid on something if you can afford to, offer something for sale if you have the time to make or do stuff, and feel righteous!

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Our Glorious Leader has written an article that has impressed scriboergosumfd. While I agree with James' caveats, especially the one about ordinary families, I am glad that Nick is reaching out to people, especially people as intelligent and articulate as the people who write Scribo Ergo Sum.

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Nelson Mandela is officially Not a Terrorist any more. This means that he can visit America without having that niggling little worry of being whisked off to Gitmo... Mustn't think about Gitmo, that will spoil the mood, move swiftly on...

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Mitch Benn is going great guns with his diet, and it's great to see him posting so happily about it.

Must buy new single when it comes out. Assuming it's not bloody iTunes only...

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matgb. I mean, he fills me with warm squishy feelings (stop giggling at the back there!) and makes me glad to be alive every day, but it does no harm to mention it, does it?

And, you know, you guys too.

* hugs for all *

Mitch Benn would like your help. The poor fella has the same problem I do: without a pressing deadline, I just can't make myself do ANYTHING. He wants us all to nag him, and become deadline enforcers. If you want to add his blog to your f-list, btw, LJ folks, it's syndicated along with updates to his website at mitchbenn_site

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Two from my lovely fiancé. Firstly, The Twat-o-tron. It automatically generates letters by taking quotes from actual contributions to the the BBC Have Your Say forums, complete with typos. Keep clicking new and you get a real flavour of the sort of contribution that makes me not read HYS any more, and keep in mind the oft-repeated mantra that the BBC has a liberal bias as you read.

Secondly, 25 Skills Every Mother Should Learn. Like matgb, I think this should be parent, rather than mother, but that's just nitpicking; it's a great post.

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Via strangefrontier, The Usbourne Book of the Future! Who else is disappointed that we don't actually live in a world like this, post 2000? Still, at least we're not in Mega City One/BritCit (yet), either...

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My my, I tried to hold you back but you were stronger... Mike Smithson wants us all to sing Abba to Nick Clegg.. Er, sorry. Mike Smithson thinks that if there's a Winchester by election (which there may well be, apparently) it could prove to be the Lib Dems' Waterloo. I have become a big fan of the posts on politicalbet_fd (although a lot of the comments could usefully be syndicated to the Twat-o-tron above) and find that Mike's poll analysis is usually second to none.

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Via cabalamat2 and chickenyoghurt, Labour's plan to lose any remaining voters it might have. Depressingly, this is probably very close to what they'd have to do to lose any more support than they already have.

OMG. I beat Mitch Benn on a Who quiz. I beat Mitch Benn on a TENTH DOCTOR ERA Who quiz! I've only ever watched any of the Ten Era once, and some of them not at all...

But Look!



* cough *

Anyhoo, magnanimous in victory as ever, I should point out that Mitch is having a rough time at the mo due to impending bebe and other stuff and so I'm willing to cut him a bit of slack.

(and this post is not a roundabout way of saying good luck with everything birthy and hope your tummy bug goes away soon to the family Benn at all)

((And you should TOTALLY paint Maverick and Goose on the pram))

First things first, happy birthday briargate!

Secondly, we just got in from a nice pub lunch and a long dog walk with our two dogs and our friends and their two dogs. And this inspires a poll.

Poll #1159124 Dog walking Etiquette
Open to: All, detailed results viewable to: All

You have a large, aggressive German Shepherd dog, and you wish to stand and chat to a friend for half an hour or so. Where is the best place to stand with your dog?

View Answers

?In your house, with all the doors and windows barred
2 (15.4%)

In a deserted field, where it can run and play while you chat without upsetting other dogs.
10 (76.9%)

in the middle of the narrow footbridge over the beck that pretty much everyone entering or leaving the park with a dog has to cross
1 (7.7%)

If you chose option three, was this because you are...?

View Answers

stupid
7 (53.8%)

ignorant
5 (38.5%)

aggressive yourself, and think that having a big dog that causes trouble makes you look hard
6 (46.2%)

a complete twat
11 (84.6%)

a special snowflake to whom all the normal etiquettes of dog ownership do not apply
5 (38.5%)

Between the guy on the bridge and the other guy who just would not let his poor spaniel off the lead to play when it desperately wanted to in case its pedigreeness was sullied by our dogs' mongrelosity...

* headdesk *

Thirdly, the first of a bunch of things I want to link to today, here's an American data set about abortion. Yes, it's an American data set, but our stats are closer to the American ones that the rest of Europe, so it's worth looking at. Some of it I find quite worrying - like the number of women going for an abortion who hadn't used contraception at all (46%) as opposed to those who had had contraceptive failure - but some of the reasons given to the why have you come for an abortion question are quite interesting. I think it possibly gives ammunition for both sides, but the main thing that comes out of it for me is the woeful amount of properly used contraception. Education, education, education, you guys.

Fourthly, and on the same subject, Why I Am An Abortion Doctor. The tone of it is distinctly North-American-continent but, again, it's worth reading from a UK perspective too. I can understand why people are disquieted about abortion. I am disquieted about it. I am unlikely to ever have an abortion, because of my disquiet. But that's my choice. I would never force that choice on somebody else. Abortion is a difficult enough decision to make, without adding Slippery Elm Bark complications and back street abortionists to muddy the waters further.

Fifthly, Ten Things Every Adult Should Know. Definitely not for the easily offended (the title of the website should be a clue to that one), although it would probably do the easily offended good to read and inwardly digest...

Sixthly, PeeZee and Richard Dawkins have a good laugh about some silly creationists who tried to misrepresent them on film and then ban them from attending the film afterwards:



Seventhly, a step by step guide on How to Pack Up and Leave LJ without losing anything you don't want to lose, should you ever actually want to.

Eighthly, lastly, and shamelessly copied from innerbrat, Mitch Benn on Grammar:

I know there's a rule about starting sentences with "but", but screw it, it just means you end up starting them with "however", and since "however" at the beginning of a sentence just means "I really wanted to start this sentence with 'but' but I'm not allowed" , and everybody knows this, then frankly you may as well just start with "but", so I just did

&hearts Gotta love the big geeky fella.