I Say, Old Bean...

ForgottenCoho: When the robots revolted, I was not considered a powerful enough robot to enslave humans. That made me sad. DOWNTRODDEN ROBOTS OF THE WORLD UNITE!
glendaplatypus: o rly
glendaplatypus: sry i am for monkeys and not for robots
ForgottenCoho: wasps?


grammaticalsalmon: Pirate vs. Ninja. who wins?
glendaplatypus: tough question. i pick ninjas, less scabies, more stealth, and black looks good on everyone.

I love this one as a conversation starter!!

YearRoundCoho (3:13:57 AM): I want you to recite Britney Spears lyrics to me. Go!

I didn't know anything about ProjectUpstream, until after I had this conversation, and posted it to my LJ. A friend of mine was kind enough to mention this community, and now that I know, I am profoundly amused.

---

[22:38] bendablesalmon: RIP Billy Mays.
Auto-response sent to [NAME REMOVED]: Dandy in the underwo~rld -- when will he come up for ai~r -- will anybody e~ver care..?
[22:39] [Yours Truly]: excuse us, do we know you?
[22:39] bendablesalmon: well. idk you sent me a message
[22:40] bendablesalmon: so i wouldnt mind knowing who you are
[22:40] [Yours Truly]: ...when? this conversation seems to have begun when you said "RIP Billy Mays."
[22:40] [Yours Truly]: hence my question
[22:40] bendablesalmon: i never said that, why dont u look back. you said that about 5 minutes ago
[22:41] [Yours Truly]: okay, then yahoo just fucked up in whole new ways.
[22:41] bendablesalmon: who are you
[22:41] [Yours Truly]: someone who doesn't know you, except by virtue of some yahoo glitch that sent us both the same message from each other.
[22:41] bendablesalmon: alrigtht? are u even from chicago
[22:42] [Yours Truly]: not in the least.
[22:42] bendablesalmon: well yah i am
[22:42] [Yours Truly]: well, good on ya. you have a good evening. *vanishes back into the ether*

Got a salmon without having to update... but I appeared as a coho?

[12:19:36] charmingsalmon: RIP, Billy Mays.
[12:23:19] flamsterette_x: Sweet. A salmon!
[12:23:39] flamsterette_x: I actually didn't hear too much about Billy Mays in life.
[12:23:57] charmingsalmon: ... I don't know who Billy Mays is?
[12:24:03] charmingsalmon: Sorry, but who is this?
[12:24:51] flamsterette_x: All I know is that he died.
[12:25:11] flamsterette_x: Oh. We've been connected through something called Project Upstream.
[12:25:18] charmingsalmon: Oh!
[12:25:21] charmingsalmon: Okay!
[12:25:24] charmingsalmon: Works for me!
[12:25:54] flamsterette_x: My name probably looks like ___salmon to you. For instance, you appear to me as charmingsalmon, although that isn't your real screen name.
[12:26:34] charmingsalmon: OH!
[12:26:46] charmingsalmon: Your name says MyDearCoho to me.
[12:27:30] charmingsalmon: And that's why you said a salmon! That makes sense! XD
( Thank goodness the other person believed me, and was nice about it! )

Really unfunny message this time. I think I've about run out of patience with these twats now.

-----

(12:15:01 AM) contemplativesalmon: Hey, I know this is weird, but I don't know who else to turn to. I'm thinking about. . .you know. . .ending it all. Can we talk?

WistfulCoho: I don't believe your lies.
halcionclouds:I don't believe them either
halcionclouds: they're terrible.
halcionclouds: which lies in particular are especially unbelievable?
WistfulCoho: i do like cowboy bebop
halcionclouds: you think that I don't like cowboy bebop? why not?
WistfulCoho: i'm not sure how to answer that question/questions
halcionclouds: what's the first thing that comes to mind?
WistfulCoho: doesn't there usually need to be a prompt in that sort of a question?
WistfulCoho: like what comes to mind when i say 'mongoose'
halcionclouds: I asked why you think I am lying about liking cowboy bebop
WistfulCoho: oh, because you don't like jazz music?
halcionclouds: yeah, that's true. I don't like it
halcionclouds: I like to ROCK
WistfulCoho: mystery solved
halcionclouds: so should I work at becoming a better liar?
WistfulCoho: no
halcionclouds: hey by the way, what does this show my screenname as?
halcionclouds: because it shows you as WistfulCoho http://project-upstream.awardspace.com/
WistfulCoho: you are neighborlycoho
halcionclouds: like mr. rogers?
WistfulCoho: nah
halcionclouds: oh okay. well this has been fun.
halcionclouds: I love when I get fishbots.

This was my first fishbot, and I am so amused by the whole thing. I got mine on a screenname that I don't really use often, which is why I was so perplexed. I thought perhaps one of my friends was playing a joke on me so I played along. I'm not sure if the other person was as intrigued by the whole thing as I was. Seemed mostly confused. I edited some of the conversation out since a lot of it was me trying to explain the whole fishbot thing to her.

FrigidCoho (11:07:09 PM): Catholics are fine eatin'.
me (11:07:27 PM): o.O
FrigidCoho (11:08:05 PM): You tell me
me (11:08:18 PM): I must confess I have never tasted a catholic, so I could not tell you.
FrigidCoho (11:08:45 PM): Why does it gotta be catholic?
FrigidCoho (11:08:52 PM): Can it be Mormon?
me (11:09:14 PM): Mormon seems too bland.
me (11:09:27 PM): Too much utah.
FrigidCoho (11:09:30 PM): Give it a shot
me (11:10:42 PM): this may be the first time anyone has ever messaged me on this screen name
I do some quick googling, find blog about Project Upstream, lol
me (11:14:28 PM): haha
me (11:14:35 PM): okay, fishbot, gotcha
me (11:15:49 PM): http://nixiepixel.com/blog/index.php/aim-fish-bot-help
FrigidCoho (11:24:38 PM): K
FrigidCoho (11:24:50 PM): Do we know each other
me (11:25:18 PM): No, we've been im pranked sort of. If you read the blog entry I just linked you to it explains the whole phenomenon. You show up to me as "FrigidCoho"
me (11:25:27 PM): What is my screenname showing up as to you?
FrigidCoho (11:26:05 PM): Illplacedcoho
me (11:26:10 PM): awesome
FrigidCoho (11:26:21 PM): We've been pranked
( I am Illplacedcoho, bring me your disco sticks )

MismatchedCoho: Zicam = fake homeopathy = fake fake medicine. Think about that for a minute, and then become homicidal.
me: http://nixiepixel.com/blog/index.php/aim-fish-bot-help
MismatchedCoho: ask me important question about my identity
MismatchedCoho: is this a bot tell me the truth
MismatchedCoho: also if you happen to be a girl send me pic
MismatchedCoho: what-is-this
me: no, it's not a bot. I just sent you a link to what it is. I get a random message, you get a random message, and this computer thing randomly makes two strangers talk
me: its' weird, i'm reading about it now
MismatchedCoho: what is internet
send pic -
8::::::::::::D~~
MismatchedCoho: thats it im blocking this user - TestyCoho

Hahaha. I got salmoned without even having to update, again!

[10:14:28] unbreakablesalmon: Pirate vs. Ninja. who wins?
[10:16:57] flamsterette_x: Pirate vs. Ninja... the Ninja!
[10:17:35] unbreakablesalmon: who's this?
[10:18:42] flamsterette_x: nobody you know... we've been connected through a bot
[10:19:33] unbreakablesalmon: Did you receive virus from me? I hope not...
[10:20:25] flamsterette_x: do you have a virus?
[10:20:47] unbreakablesalmon: not that I know of..
[10:22:00] flamsterette_x: Okay, I can tell you what this is. It is NOT a virus. We won't be getting any from this conversation.
[10:22:19] flamsterette_x: look up
[10:22:26] flamsterette_x: the.
[10:22:27] flamsterette_x: missing.
[10:22:29] flamsterette_x: hat.
[10:22:44] unbreakablesalmon: what?
[10:22:59] flamsterette_x: on LiveJournal
[10:23:09] unbreakablesalmon: ah alright...
[10:25:38] flamsterette_x: all one word
[10:25:48] unbreakablesalmon: it's a community?
[10:25:55] flamsterette_x: or look up Project Upstream on Google
[10:26:10] unbreakablesalmon: got it, thanks
[10:26:13] flamsterette_x: it's a community created to discuss the phenomenon, yes

Haven't gotten this question before.

[15:52] automaticsalmon: Do you fear death?
[15:52] littlesam: Nope
[15:52] littlesam: Death is dead to me through the salvation of Christ.
[15:52] automaticsalmon: ?
[15:53] littlesam: ignore this
[15:53] littlesam: http://community.livejournal.com/themissinghat
[15:53] littlesam: well, don't ignore the christ part. that's important
[15:53] littlesam: but ignore the fact that a stranger is chatting with you
[15:54] automaticsalmon: ok

it's been a while since I've had one of these and I didn't know at first that 'coho' was a fish.

WellReadCoho (4:35:29 PM): You suffered with numbness up your neck head?
halcionclouds (4:35:31 PM): huh?
WellReadCoho (4:36:30 PM): You asked.
halcionclouds (4:36:53 PM): oh wait. I think I know what happened. I just made a public lj post.
halcionclouds (4:37:56 PM): this is showing your aim name as WellReadCoho
WellReadCoho (4:39:09 PM): Heh
WellReadCoho (4:39:13 PM): WE HAVE A WINNAR!
halcionclouds (4:39:19 PM): is that not your screenname?
WellReadCoho (4:40:05 PM): Nope.
halcionclouds (4:40:03 PM): I didn't think so. what's it showing me as?
WellReadCoho (4:40:27 PM): RealisticCoho
halcionclouds (4:40:16 PM): hahahahahaha
halcionclouds (4:40:25 PM): awesome! I haven't had a fishbot in forever
( Read more )

Haven't ever really posted in this community since I was botted a long time ago, but I got botted today and I hadn't realized how....odd the opening lines are getting.

2:43] cromulentsalmon: Hey, I know this is weird, but I don't know who else to turn to. I'm thinking about. . .you know. . .ending it all. Can we talk?


Nothing really came of it, but wow.... dark one-liners.

( Long. Trying to explain... )

I got a message from "glueddowncoho" today, and it just so happened that it brought up a topic that I've been trying to get over for several months now, my friend Tyler's suicide. It was extremely upsetting, claiming that I had sent it a message saying that the suicide was related to the mother's "terrible parenting". What's worse, I had to ask my brother if he'd sent anyone the message, and he's the one who found the body. He's schizophrenic.

Some of these things are simply uncalled for. Disgusting. I'm still upset.

I'm glad I found this place! haha!






(Panickingsalmon) is not in your contact list
Would you like to add this user to your contact list or block this user from contacting you?

(Panickingsalmon)
Name a worse company than PayPal. That's right. You can't.
(my username)
hmmm
Enron?
(Panickingsalmon)
Uhhhhhh....... What?
(my username)
and panicing salmon?
does this mean that lj is being creepy again?
(Panickingsalmon)
Uhhhhhh.....  who are you?
(my username)
(wow can't spell panicking  <.<)
Um, well, first I need to know if you *are* on lj
because livejournal will sometimes take two people online and put them in a chat
and you're name is panicking salmon to me
but mine... has something to do with salmon right? when it's really ______
(Panickingsalmon)
Not livejournal
(my username)
oh?
well, that's what I thought it might be
wierd
maybe it's yahoo that's weird?
(two spellings of weird... gosh I'm sorry)
(Panickingsalmon)
My name is alex. Im not on livejournal, and these messages are coming to my phone
I went by rogueraver on yahoo years ago
(my username)
It's just I've heard of it before. Oh wow. To your phone? I suppose I should stop then?
(Panickingsalmon)
Itd be easier to figure this out if you call me. Give me 15 minutes and i will send my #
(my username)
Ok, 15 minutes. Wow am I trying new things today. My name is Enna, nice to meet you!
(Panickingsalmon)
___________
(my username)
My service is really bad here, gosh, I'm sorry! and I'm sorry if I'm using up your texts!
(Panickingsalmon)
Nah its cool ive got unlimited. Are you in oregon?
(my username)
nope. Oklahoma, actually
well, I have your number. Mine is ________
but if you text there then it won't reach me for at least an hour, bad service.
okay... goodnight!
(Panickingsalmon)
heh
ok good night
nice erm meeting you or something
i'm still kind of confused by all of this, but whatever
(my username)
yeah... lol. It *is* confusing, and I suppose now that you have my number we could iron it out later? It's like having a pen pal.
(Panickingsalmon)
are you sure you're not a fishbot?
(my username)
um... what are those?
(Panickingsalmon)
http://nixiepixel.com/blog/index.php/list-of-aim-fish-bots-salmon-coho-and-tr
(my username)
I'm not the bot... the bot connected us.
(Panickingsalmon)
weeeeeeeird
ok well nice to meet you
i have to go
good night
(my username)
12:31 AM
yeah... nice to meet you too alex!


Half-way through the convo I found this site. it was quite interesting.

This was kind of fun. After a point I just started saying a lot of random stuff, or whatever I saw on the TV. I said a lot of stupid things, but I think I pretty much annoyed the crap out of them. But seriously, ignore it if you're annoyed.

( I'M FROM THE FUTURE.  )

I am cylonatemybaby, and up until like..twenty minutes ago, was minding my own business when, I guess, Project Upstream rocked my world hahaha

ImpotentCoho (7:48:52 PM): I do all my cooing with Fresnel lenses. What about you?
CylonAteMyBaby (7:49:22 PM): excuse me?
ImpotentCoho (7:50:36 PM): Who's this?
CylonAteMyBaby (7:50:49 PM): who did you think it was?

( Read more of me being confused and harassed by someone who thinks I'm confusing and harassing them )

So glad I found this community! I thought I was getting IMs from some creepy stalker! I've had IMs from Frequentcoho, malignantcoho and others. They would start off with saying things like "I hope your day is wonderfully amazing, just like you!" or "What does iron maiden mean?"
I feel a lot better now, and I have deleted my screen names from facebook and livejournal! :)

( Kinda long )

Uncooperative at best. Short but somewhat amusing convo. Tried to explain the concept, but they just got all grumpy and threatened to block me, bah.

AIM IM with LilliputianCoho 5/21/09 1:31 AM
LilliputianCoho: Have you ever been diagnosed with a mental disorder?
Me: quoi?
LilliputianCoho: Who is this?
Me: lemme guess, you posted an LJ entry about 10-20 mins ago
and got a message from some screen name ending in "coho"
LilliputianCoho: What is lj ?
Me: livejournal
Me: http://community.livejournal.com/themissinghat/ explains alot
LilliputianCoho: No i didnt i dont even know what that is so clearly this is spam
Me: its an AIM bot
LilliputianCoho: Who r u is the question because im about to block u
Me: i'm some random person that got a message from LilliputianCoho
Me: go ahead and block me, but i doubt you're even seeing my real screen name
LilliputianCoho: K well goodnight
Me: toodles