Annarti ([info]annarti) wrote in [info]talechasing,
@ 2005-09-24 01:05:00
Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Current mood: bouncy
Current music:dumb = garbage
Entry tags:annarti, updates

Riders of the King's Own
Finished this one a few days ago and promptly forgot to mention it here. I rule!

Anyway, this is a story I wrote as a going away pressie to my friends list for when I buggered off to Pommyland for four months, but as I say, I only just finished it... two months after I arrived in said Pommyland. Still, it's done, so I'm happy, theflist is happy, everyone's happy, yay!

Will probably make very little sense to anyone who doesn't know about Raykin and the King's Own already, so~ yeah. If you go to my Elfwood space and read a little bit there before this one, you'll have a better shot.

For ayone who already has, this is the story of one of the missions with the King's Own, specifically the most recent one, and Nimay's first as General. Good on 'er =3

Introduction by Yen (Prince) Nolryn
Mission Brief by Kul (General) Nimay
Week 1 by Gylepi
Week 2 by Emon
Week 3 by Ulkar
Week 4 by Inel
Week 5 by Melraan
Week 6 by Yoryl
Week 7 by Murali
Week 8 by Rumal
Week 9 by Anganur
Week 10 by Haenel
Week 11 by Kaen
Week 12 by Kurae
Week 13 by Garuk
Week 14 by Yen Nolryn
Week 15 by Kul Nimay
Week 16 by Gylepi
Week 17 by Emon
Week 18 by Ulkar
Week 19 by Inel
Week 20 by Melraan
Final Report by Kul Nimay


(Post a new comment)


[info]ladylight
2005-09-24 03:09 pm UTC (link)
Lookit, they're all there! Bless your dear Adelaidean heart :D

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]annarti
2005-09-24 03:13 pm UTC (link)
Aww, you're welcome hun *^^*

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]ladylight
2005-09-24 04:26 pm UTC (link)
Woot! Now that it's all conweeniently packed in together (thankee again!), I've actually finished it! Since you gave kawa~ links, I'll just pop all my comments in here. This was much fun to read ... the King's Own are such a great pack of yobs. ;) I think Emon may have entertained me most ...

Yup. So. Here are my rambly thoughts as typed while reading. Expect no coherence. :D

- How many men in total (not just the Own) are going out to clear and 'keep hold of' the caravan route as mentioned in the first brief? If there are lots of peoples, it could be really, really tough to keep them all supplied and fed while they're stationed out there. And if there aren't lots, it would probably be easy for bandits to bugger off, hide until they're gone and then come back.

- Bless you, bless you, bless you for not having 'a basquillion!soldiers in the eeeeevil Empress's army'. Small kingdoms with a few hundred make so much more sense in the setting.

- I like the way that different commentators repeat certain comments and overlap some of the same details mentioned by others - it seems more natural.

- Occasionally some parts feel a bit more like omniscient narrative than someone writing a real retelling, but it's never distracting. And really, without some of those classic direct quotes in there, there wouldn't be half as much to giggle at.

- Have I mentioned how I love all the different voices? :D

- The barrier of skulls - anyone ever considered vandalising or removing them? Seems odd they'd be left unharassed if there's all that bad blood between them (and they're such a nasty landmark!).

- Customs to Kazin: 'giving duration of our visit' - this seems a bit anachronistic. Why would they need to know that in this setting? Their names, their country and any interesting goods they happened to be carrying around would really be the only useful bits of info for a country without modern infrastructure, I'd think.

- Why are the bandits classified as 'evil Kazinians to be swatted' if they're harassing local Kazinians as well? Couldn't they just be 'evil bandits'? And why would the Kazinian authorities be upset about the Raykinians getting rid of their bandit problem?

- Melraan's arrow in the leg - if it was 'full in the leg', I'd think it would cause serious problems for him to walk on; tendon and ligature damage, maybe bone damage, blah blah. Or is he just switching on bravado? ;)

- I love the fact that exciting feats aren't cropping up every single day - lots of travel and boredom. (Bet -they- don't love it, though ... muahaha.)

- I like the thief hand-cutting tradition. Beats cutting the whole thing off, eh? ;)

- 'Make that Aeia-damned horse less sexy!' has got to win the title for Sentence You Least Want to Read Out of Context XD

- "Opening my eyes I found I was staring down the shaft of a desert man’s spear. If that had happened in Kazin, I would have just snatched my sword from its sheath and skewered the guy, but I haven’t been in that mindset for just about three weeks now, so a disbelieving groan was about all I could manage."

Hmmm ... but there's been a lot of talk about how 'instinct has to take over ' amongst the Own, and I'd think human nature would draw only one conclusion from a threatening figure with a spear at your throat ...

- Final injury tally: it's a bit lucky they're all breaks, no severings or bad flesh wounds, given that blades were involved. Ah well, luck's fine. (I love Yoryl's injury rundown.)


That there's the end of my ramblies. This really was fun to read - quite a feat for the parts where nothing supposedly significant happened for days at a time! All the different personalities came out beautifully. And I really like the casual diary format ... perhaps I'll shamelessly imitate it one day. ^_-

Yay Nimay~~

Now I'd better go rest my eyes from reading/Weagle-crying ... :(

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]annarti
2005-09-24 05:23 pm UTC (link)
How many men in total (not just the Own) are going out to clear and 'keep hold of' the caravan route as mentioned in the first brief?

God only knows =D; As far as my storyline goes, they haven't actually gotten up to that bit--they were rudely interrupted in their preparations. Wild guess tho, I'd say maybe 800-odd? Spread out over the whole region, which is probably about half the size of Tassie. Like I say tho, they haven't had the chance to do anything about it yet. Resurrected 4000-year-old kings'll do that to ya *nods wisely*

The barrier of skulls - anyone ever considered vandalising or removing them?

...There is so very much a fic in that *writes it down* It's so much out in the middle of nowhere that really only the traders ever see it. I'd imagine that the Raykinians would have great fun in kicking the skulls around a bit tho, then the Kazinians grumble and fix it back up again X3

Customs to Kazin: 'giving duration of our visit'

What week was that bit in?

Why are the bandits classified as 'evil Kazinians to be swatted' if they're harassing local Kazinians as well? Couldn't they just be 'evil bandits'?

I could just say "because they hate each other more than their own problems," but that's too shallow ^^; Basically, the bandits would have originally been targeting just the foreign caravans ('member the Kazinian law system, or lack thereof? They would've had an entire village on their arses before long, baying for their blood), and only started attacking their own when it was apparent that the foreign trade had been closed until further notice.

And why would the Kazinian authorities be upset about the Raykinians getting rid of their bandit problem?

They probably wouldn't be if they actually knew what the Own was doing, but from what they saw, the Raykinians were just bumping off any Kazinian they came across, so the Kazinian authorities were Pissy.

Melraan's arrow in the leg - ... Or is he just switching on bravado?

Melraan is the most bravado-y (O.o) member of the Own, 'cept maybe for Anganur. Unless he literally couldn't stand on it, there's no way he'd admit to excruciating pain X3 Ya gotta love 'im X)

Hmmm ... but there's been a lot of talk about how 'instinct has to take over ' amongst the Own, and I'd think human nature would draw only one conclusion from a threatening figure with a spear at your throat ...

I'm just figuring they're all too bloody tired and achey to do anything much. Reflexes wouldn't be quite fast enough at that time of the morning, either ^.~

it's a bit lucky they're all breaks, no severings or bad flesh wounds, given that blades were involved. Ah well, luck's fine.

This is where they all stare~ at you and go "See us in action and tell us if it's 'luck' XP" But they're all cocky bastards. Half the mission is luck, whether they admit to it or not X3


Lovely ramblies which I will have to take on board when I get around to editing it back home. Thanking you muchly! *^^* ♥

Ooh, before I forget, would you like to be a beta for Silent Harmony? Basically means you see the chapters before I finally get around to sticking them up on Elfwood. Because coding, uploading and waiting for a month for it to go through the ticketing system is boring and time consuming and I can only bring myself to do it every three or four chapters =D;

*snugs* More comiserations for your poor WEagles. I feel for you and the bois *kissu*

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

[info]ladylight
2005-09-25 01:30 pm UTC (link)
Solly, I forgot which week the customs bit was ... whenever they first entered Kazin, I reckon. (Oo, I'm sharp tonight.) And YERSE I'd love to be on the 'Silent Harmony' beta list, petal, provided it contains plenty of Yan's boots. *nodnod*

And many thanks for the condolences. Perhaps the Melb Commonwealth Games will turn up a few things for us to cheer about. ... Nah, who watches them? ;)



(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

[info]annarti
2005-09-25 04:08 pm UTC (link)
Yay~ you're on the beta list =D So you should now be able to read all of that stuff, hurrah! I advise you not to touch the drafts tho, they're attrocious >>;;

Commonwealth Games? You just wait, by the time it actually comes around you won't be able to avoid it. Channel 7'll have it on 24 hours a day for two weeks XD;;

The Super Series with the cricket is happening in October--us against the rest of the world. D'ya reckon e can pull ourselves together for that one? =D;;

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]ambsdrig
2005-10-13 12:31 pm UTC (link)
I enjoyed this little tale - very believable heores - and there was a flesh wound during the split into four groups a think it was a blade archer Yokul (sp?) that had part of his hand flapping - obviously he didn't lose it.

I guess I most be the country bumkin as Ukol was def my fav of the gang - I was thinking I also liked a second equally but when searching back through saw that was his other entry so that confirms I like that swordie the most. His desire to show off at every village because he felt their village was slighted before as a kid and maybe next mission I'll have enough energy until realizing that it wasn't to be.

I like how the swordies want to participate in the rivalry between blade archers and real archers - but don't for fear both will gang up on them.

I understnd you want to distinguish between them like teams with the red shirts, blue and purple - I guess I forgot the forth color but found this a little unusual.

Also the pikemen seem to get rather washed out as less important and I find it a litle hard to see their effectivness in such small numbers - especially they are split in the pre-arranged four group split and run. I always thought that pikes became more powerfull as the number wielding them increased.

Thank you for a fun read.

(Reply to this)

Create an Account
Forgot your login or password?
Login w/ OpenID
English • Español • Deutsch • Русский…