A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Apocalypse
Title: A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Apocalypse
Author: Gileswench
Contact: gileswench@yahoo.com
Date: 6/13/07
Spoilers: None really. If you know who the characters are, you’re safe.
Summary: Giles runs into a slight snag on his way to save the world
Rating: FRC
Pairing: Genfic
Category: Sillyfic
Distribution: If you've had my permission in the past, you have it now. All others, ask and ye shall receive.
Feedback: Constructive criticism always welcome. Praise abjectly sought.
Disclaimer: It all belongs to Joss, Mutant Enemy, etc., etc., etc. I just let them have all the fun Joss won't. I own nothing except my twisted mind which you really don't want. Please don't sue.
Notes: This is all the fault of the fabulous and talented khaoschilde for making the banner of the same name. Blame her. I know I do.
Yes, Officer? Is there a problem?
Oh…ah…yes…yes, I certainly understand why you’re concerned, but…but you see…it’s nothing to worry about, really. Why do I have these swords? Well, you see, I’m…I’m directing a play. Romeo and Juliet, you know. Yes. Sword fights aplenty in that one. The bottle? No, no, that’s the poison. Not real poison, you understand. It’s just water, actually. Nothing to concern yourself about.
Ah. Crossbows. No, you don’t see many crossbows in your average production of Romeo and Juliet, but I think they lend a certain historical atmosphere in the hands of the proper extras. Guards, and so on, you know.
No, Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are from Hamlet. And Bottom is Midsummer Night’s Dream. Really, if you’re going to simply shout out random names…Uncle Vanya isn’t even Shakespeare, Xander. Do try to remember what play you’re in. And don’t help me talk to the nice policemen. He’s playing Tybalt, actually, Officer. You might not think it to look at him, but he’s very good in the role.
Stakes, you say? Are there really stakes in my car? Good lord! How did those get there? Really, the shoddy tricks actors play on directors these days. No, no, don’t confiscate…I’m sure it was all just a harmless bit of fun.
Yes, well, it’s an old leather volume. Well there’s a priest and an apothecary in the play. Surely one of them has some notion how to read and a paperback romance novel isn’t going to give at all the right impression! Yes, I know it’s not in English. The play is set in Italy. Why would they be reading English?
The bag of herbs? Yes, I know it’s not a very pleasant smell. No! Of course I don’t have any marijuana in there! Xander, shut up! You are not going to smoke those herbs! Willow needs them!
No, she’s not addicted. She’s…um…playing the Nurse. Yes. And I’ve got a bit of business for her involving herbs. No, really, they’re not illegal drugs. Well, there’s hellebore, and…and…toad stones, and, yes, quite a variety, Officer. No, there’s no need to run them through lab tests, honestly. Please don’t confiscate my props! Oh, dear.
No, no, I’m not being difficult, it’s just, that’s very fragile…oh dear lord, NO!
Bloody hell.
No, really, Officer, it isn’t my fault your partner just turned into an armadillo. I’ve no idea how that happened at all. Honestly, there’s no need for handcuffs. Oh. Dear. Um…did you really have to do that? No, I’m not resisting. Shut up, Xander! Go get Buffy! Now! No you may not have the cuffs when I’m done with them!
Just get Buffy! Hurry! And tell her I’m sorry I’ll be late for the apocalypse. Next time she can transport her own bloody armoury!
THE END
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gileswench) wrote in ![[info]](http://p-stat.livejournal.com/img/community.gif){kind=small}
summer_of_giles,
amused
