Title: Dinner for Two
Chapter: Oneshot
Fandom: Whose Line is it Anyway
Genre: Slash
Pairing(s): Brad/Ryan.
Warnings: A tiny bit of foul language, but quite a lot of STEAMY GRAPHICNESS!
Disclaimer: Don't own Whose Line. Not making money from this.
A/N: In this fic, everyone except Brad is married/dating as they are in real life. From Brad’s PoV.
This was surprisingly hard to write – I’ve not had much experience with sexual/passionate/smutty scenes, but as I need to write a few for both Evergreen and Scent of Fear, expect quite a few of these steamy oneshots.


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Scanning the restaurant for his target, Brad’s eyes passed tables upon tables of couples. Happy couples. Smiling couples. Couples gazing at each other. Couples feeding each other. Couples kissing each other in the candlelight. It was all very sweet.

“Gimme a break…” Brad muttered to himself, feeling slightly nauseous.

It was jealousy and he knew it. He wasn’t going to great lengths to hide it, either. He wasn’t about to slip into denial; he was lonely. He was at an age where sleeping around wasn’t fun any more. He needed something more. Something substantial. Something…something.

Trouble was, he knew what that something was.

And that something would be there tonight.

With his wife.

Another wave of nausea washed over him as he wondered why he forced himself to come to these stupid things. Every year, Drew forked out God only knows how much to pay for the guys and their significant others to have a slap-up meal in a fancy restaurant. The girls would bring their burly husbands; Drew and Jeff would bring whatever pretty young creature they were sleeping with at the time; and the guys would bring their wives.

Ryan would bring Pat.

Brad wasn’t about to kid himself; Pat was a wonderful person, and more than deserving of Ryan, so he would never be surly towards her. After all, she hadn’t intentionally tried to hurt Brad, or even done anything wrong. But his jealously burned in the back of his mind every time the three of them were together.

“Brad!” a voice called, “Over here!”

Brad followed the direction of the voice to see Wayne waving at him. He gave a small wave back then picked his way past even more couples to join the party.

“Hey, Brad!” Drew said loudly, rising from his seat to shake Brad’s hand, “Do take a seat.”

Brad was a little nervous at Drew’s overt cheerfulness, but put it down to alcohol and glanced around for a seat. There appeared to be only one vacancy.

Next to Ryan.

Slightly confused, he nudged Chip – who was closest – in the back.

“What?”

“Where’s Pat?”

Chip gestured next to him, “She’s right here, you idiot.”

Brad rolled his eyes, “Not your Pat! Ryan’s wife!”

“Oh. She’s not here.” Chip said, unusually ambiguously, “Something about…I don’t know. But she’s not here.”

He turned away before Brad could further probe him.

“Oh, Brad, hey!” Ryan said, looking up for the first time, “Didn’t see you arrive. Do join us.”

He nodded towards the seat next to him. Shrugging inwardly, Brad moved past Chip and took the seat next to Ryan.

“Pat not here?”

Ryan paused, reaching for his wine, “N-no. She, uh…she had to do a…uh, do a thing.”

He took a shaky sip as Brad stared at him. Something had clearly happened between Ryan and Pat, and by the way Chip had acted, he knew what it was, which meant everyone probably knew. But Brad was being kept in the dark.

He felt slightly neglected, but let it go. The less he knew about Ryan’s romantic life, the better.

As the evening went on, Brad felt more and more relaxed. He even started to have fun. That had never happened at one of these dinners before (discounting the time Greg had got completely plastered, stood up to make a toast, and immediately fell over right into the neighbouring table’s dessert). He hated to admit it, but the sole reason he was having more fun was because Pat wasn’t there. For the first time ever, Ryan’s attention was completely focused on him, and he was loving every minute of it.

Suddenly, he felt a brush of skin against his leg. He glanced briefly down to see Ryan’s hand hovering around his lap. He looked back up to see Ryan continuing the conversation as naturally as could be. It was an accident, Brad told himself as he reached over for his drink. Just as he lifted the glass to his lips, Ryan’s hand once again met his thigh with a sharp squeeze. Brad’s drink caught in his throat and he choked and spluttered, catching the attention of most of the table. Ryan kept his hand stubbornly on Brad’s knee.

“You okay?” Greg asked.

“He’s fine,” Ryan answered, “I told him my Japanese golfer joke and he just couldn’t contain his laughter.”

A murmur went around the table, and they returned to their meals and conversations.

“What the hell are you doing?” Brad asked in an undertone.

“Just keep talking,” Ryan replied enigmatically, slowly sliding his hand up Brad’s thigh.

Brad had never felt simultaneously confused and aroused before. And he wasn’t sure he liked it.

“Ryan…”

Ryan shushed him and began making circular motions across the top of Brad’s legs, gradually moving over to his groin. Clearing his throat nervously, Brad attempted to do as Ryan said and made small talk.

“So, uh…uh…what’s the weather been like?”

What the hell…?

Ryan barely reacted, just letting a flicker of amusement grace his pitilessly determined face as his hand wandered further and further up Brad’s leg. Before too long, he’d reached Brad’s flies. Brad pleaded with his eyes for Ryan to leave well alone, but the small, slightly evil smile he received in reply told him that wasn’t going to happen. Slowly and inexorably, the zipper was pulled down. Helpless to do or say anything in front of the thirty or so people that surrounded him, Brad leaned forward and tried to cover his burning red face with his hands.

Ryan moved gently but relentlessly, stroking and caressing any skin he had access to. A small moan built up at the back of Brad’s throat which he tried to pass off as a cough. His forehead was laced with sweat. He was shaking uncontrollably. And after a while, the fact that they could so easily get caught only enhanced the ecstasy.

Ryan, clearly bored with teasing him, gave up the gentle façade and grabbed Brad’s penis as hard and as tight as he could. The cutlery on the table rang out as Brad’s fist met the table with a loud thud. He forced a small smile at Chip, who had looked up inquisitively, then glanced over at Ryan. He was shocked, and almost galled, to see he’d struck up a conversation with Karen to his left, while his hand still rubbed, almost of its own free will, against Brad’s genitals.

Panting for breath, flushed and sweating, Brad slyly reached under the table and grabbed Ryan’s wrist, forcing him to stop. Ryan abandoned his conversation with Karen to glare at Brad, who just shook his head.

Enough was enough.

If he was going to do this, he needed to give a reason.

Ryan seemed to understand, slowly withdrawing his hand and retreating it to his own lap.

“Wanna talk?” he asked, all teasing aside, his cheeky determination subsiding to seriousness, “I can understand that you have questions.”

“Uh…” Brad fidgeted with his napkin and glanced down at his lap, “Y-yeah…in a couple minutes.”

Ryan smiled, “Sure thing.”

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As everyone had filed out of the restaurant – Wayne and Jeff supporting a very drunk Drew in their arms – Brad and Ryan broke off from the group and dashed around the side of the restaurant, to a dark alley with a few overflowing bins.

“What the hell happened back there?” Brad asked, arms crossed across his torso.

“I jerked you off,” Ryan replied matter-of-factly, unable to keep the smirk out of his tone.

“Don’t kid around, Ry!” Brad half-yelled, “That’s the single weirdest thing I’ve ever experienced, and I need to know why it happened!”

Ryan sighed and leaned against the wall of the restaurant, “Okay, fine. As you’ve probably already worked out, Pat and I…well, we split up.”

“I knew something had happened; Chip got all weird when I asked about it.”

“Probably because I didn’t tell him, or anyone else, exactly why we broke up. Plus I’d told them not to tell you.”

“That was going to be my next question.” Brad said with a nod.

“I wasn’t trying to hide it from you or anything,” Ryan said, a hint of panic in his voice, “I don’t have any reason to. But…the reason we broke up…I couldn’t tell anyone else but you. And if I told you when I told everyone else, and gave some fake reason, then you would never believe the truth.”

“Which is?”

Ryan ran his hands down his face and took a deep breath, “I’m completely in love with you.”

Brad’s eyes widened.

From what had happened in the restaurant, Brad had guessed it was something to do with him, but he’d assumed it was just some unshakable attraction. A stupid crush that got out of hand. A meaningless, sexual desire.

Like he felt for Ryan.

Love had never even crossed his mind until then.

“Brad?”

He glanced up at Ryan who had concern etched across his face. Speechless, Brad just slowly shrugged.

“Should I…should I have not told you?” Ryan asked.

“No, no, no, it’s…better I know. I think.” He ran a hand through his hair, “Are you sure it’s love?”

“Oh yeah.”

“Fuck.” Brad leaned against the wall and gently hit his head a couple of times against it, “I want to say it back-”

“I don’t expect you to,” Ryan interrupted quickly, “I don’t expect anything.”

“Ry…”

Ryan dipped his head, “It’s okay, really.”

“…I love you, too.”

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.x.Sess.x.