frostfire ([info]frostfire_17) wrote in [info]sga_flashfic,
@ 2005-06-21 20:28:00
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Entry tags:author: frostfire, challenge: abandonment

The Neglected, or, They're Where Your Socks Go After the Washing Machine Eats Them, by Frostfire
Title: The Neglected
or
They're Where Your Socks Go After the Washing Machine Eats Them
Author: Frostfire
Category: Ficlet, humor
Pairing: implied Sheppard/McKay
Notes: This is my take on a well-beloved McKay/Sheppard plot device.


…meanwhile, while McKay and Sheppard are (choose one) a) forced into sex by hostile aliens; b) trapped somewhere where (i) they must share body heat to survive, or (ii) one must watch the other’s life slowly bleed away, helpless; c) fucking like bunnies of their own accord; or d) bantering wittily and with enormous sums of underlying UST…

 

“Hey, Teyla.”

“Yes, Lieutenant Ford?”

“You want mushrooms?”

“No mushrooms. The pineapple, however, would be welcome.”

“Okay, you get away with that only because you’re from another planet. So, pineapple and Canadian bacon on one half, mushrooms and sausage on the other, and two large Cokes. You got the DVD?”

“Mystery Science Theater 3000?”

“That’s it. We should get through at least half of it before we have to go save their asses. Or—wait. Are we saving or almost catching them in the act today?”

“I thought you knew.”

“Damn. We’ll just have to wing it. Okay, pizza should be here soon, hand me the movie. You’re going to love this…”


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[info]ficklememeer
2005-06-22 03:33 am UTC (link)
ROTFLMAO!!!!

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]frostfire_17
2005-06-22 05:21 am UTC (link)
Thanks!

yay, icon! *hums* ...in your mind you've already succumbed to me, dropped all defenses, completely succumbed to me...

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)
(no subject) - [info]ficklememeer, 2005-06-22 05:22 am UTC

[info]kyrdwyn
2005-06-22 03:56 am UTC (link)
OMG! bwahahahaha! This is perfect!

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]frostfire_17
2005-06-22 05:22 am UTC (link)
Thanks! Every time I use that plot device (and I do, oh yes!) I cringe. So I needed to do something to redeem myself in the eyes of the fanfic gods. *Without* admitting that I can't write Ford or Teyla for beans...

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]wickedwords
2005-06-22 04:06 am UTC (link)
He-he-he. Oh, that's funny.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]frostfire_17
2005-06-22 05:23 am UTC (link)
Thanks! Glad you liked it! Yay pineapple icon!

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]rosewildeirish
2005-06-22 04:10 am UTC (link)
LOL! You are eval. *g*

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]frostfire_17
2005-06-22 05:24 am UTC (link)
*steeples fingers evally* I will make the whole world helpless with laughter, and then I will RULE!

...or something. ^_^

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]porntestpilot
2005-06-22 04:15 am UTC (link)
I'll take d for 500.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]frostfire_17
2005-06-22 05:27 am UTC (link)
Probably my choice as well. Although I have a hard time saying no to sex.

...that came out weird.

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)
(no subject) - [info]porntestpilot, 2005-06-22 05:28 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]frostfire_17, 2005-06-23 02:03 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]porntestpilot, 2005-06-23 02:04 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]frostfire_17, 2005-06-23 05:22 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]porntestpilot, 2005-06-23 11:39 am UTC

[info]minnow1212
2005-06-22 04:21 am UTC (link)
Hee! I adore the title. Poor Ford and Teyla, being socks.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]frostfire_17
2005-06-22 05:28 am UTC (link)
They vanish, I tell you! I think 90% of all the pens I've ever bought are there with them, hiding under the couch amid piles of socks and pizza boxes.

Glad you liked it!

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]dzurlady
2005-06-22 04:29 am UTC (link)
Hee!

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]frostfire_17
2005-06-22 05:29 am UTC (link)
Always happy to make someone laugh! Thanks!

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]fenris_wolf0
2005-06-22 04:37 am UTC (link)
Hee hee hee... And I'll go with d) too. :p

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]frostfire_17
2005-06-22 05:29 am UTC (link)
Oh, the banter, the unendingly witty banter...it's sex with words, I tell you. ^_^

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]morena_donn
2005-06-22 04:53 am UTC (link)
Or—wait. Are we saving or almost catching them in the act today?”

This is just too funny! Loved it

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]frostfire_17
2005-06-22 05:30 am UTC (link)
Thanks! And it's so totally true. I've used it myself. Bye-bye, Ford and Teyla, return at a more convenient moment! At least this way, they get pizza and movies while they're gone. Glad you liked it!

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]tafkarfanfic
2005-06-22 05:08 am UTC (link)
*dies laughing*

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]frostfire_17
2005-06-22 05:32 am UTC (link)
*revives you, dusts you off, and sets you on your feet* Any the worse for wear? No? If you are, I can send Ford and Teyla off to give you emergency medical attention while John and Rodney have sex...

Glad you liked it!

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]canadian_snoopy
2005-06-22 06:41 am UTC (link)
Personally, I think it's the title that sells it because after reading it, I looked up again and snorted cola up the wrong pipe.

Kudos ;o)))

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]frostfire_17
2005-06-23 01:49 am UTC (link)
It came to me when I was laughing at myself about ordering pizza from the Pegasus galaxy. They've jumped dimensions. Or...something. Plus, my socks are always lost that way.

Glad you liked it!

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]laughingacademy
2005-06-22 08:38 am UTC (link)
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Heeeeeee...

Well, that sounds like a more pleasant way to spend the time than the scenarios most fanfic writers cook up. (I have lost track of the number of times Tela and Ford have been marched away at knife/spear/gun-point.)

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]frostfire_17
2005-06-23 01:51 am UTC (link)
If they have to miss out on the hot sweaty sex, they might as well get pizza for their troubles, don't you think? (Actually, the story arose because I've been feeling a bit bad, personally, about using this particular plot device, mostly because I can't write either of them for beans. Shh, don't tell.)

Glad you liked it!

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]buddleia
2005-06-22 10:01 am UTC (link)
Very funny! Now I'm picturing Ford and Teyla getting Teal'c and Sam's pizza order by mistake and yelling at the pizza delivery service because Sam always gets artichoke on hers.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]frostfire_17
2005-06-23 01:54 am UTC (link)
Oh man, that'd totally happen. Although I tend to mind less about Teal'c and Sam being booted out in fanfic because the show so often splits the team into pairs in canon (although often the wrong ones. grr).

Glad you liked it!

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]dk_tigrrr
2005-06-22 11:25 am UTC (link)
Bwah!!!! I haven't laughed this hard in quite a while. Thankies :))))

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]frostfire_17
2005-06-23 01:55 am UTC (link)
Thanks! Glad you enjoyed it!

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]tinnny
2005-06-22 12:59 pm UTC (link)
Ooooh, frostfic! *giggles madly*

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]frostfire_17
2005-06-23 01:56 am UTC (link)
*grins* I'm ba~ack...and there should be more than sillyfic soon. Hopefully. Provided work schedule allows. *crosses fingers*

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]thecomfychair
2005-06-22 03:28 pm UTC (link)
heeeeee!

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]frostfire_17
2005-06-23 01:57 am UTC (link)
Thanks! Your icon makes me laugh.

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]burntcopper
2005-06-22 03:55 pm UTC (link)
:snicker: They probably have the camera set up for when they go in. And probably regard said time as rightfully theirs for what they have to put up with.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]frostfire_17
2005-06-23 01:58 am UTC (link)
Oh, you bet they do. I mean, all this sex and they don't get any. (I would have written them some, but oh, how I cannot write Ford or Teyla. *sniff* So they get this instead.)

Glad you liked it!

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]scap3goat
2005-06-22 05:35 pm UTC (link)
OMG!!! ^^ Love it!

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]frostfire_17
2005-06-23 01:58 am UTC (link)
Thanks! ^_^

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]wildmachinery
2005-06-22 06:34 pm UTC (link)
“I thought you knew.”

“Damn. We’ll just have to wing it.

OMGLOVE. I may die from laughing.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]frostfire_17
2005-06-23 01:59 am UTC (link)
Thanks, glad you liked it! Yay for sillies! *pets the sadly neglected Ford and Teyla* I'd write them something real if I could write either of them believably. Sadly, it is not possible.

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]_bettina_
2005-06-22 07:39 pm UTC (link)
*snort*

*g*

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]frostfire_17
2005-06-23 02:00 am UTC (link)
Glad you liked it!

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]kiarasayre
2005-06-22 09:12 pm UTC (link)
Absolutely *brilliant*.

However, knowing this fandom's writers, I'm going to have to say it's probably (a) or (b)ii. ;)

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]frostfire_17
2005-06-23 02:01 am UTC (link)
Those two do appear a lot, don't they? And given the angst-level possible with both, Ford and Teyla are probably happy to stick with their pizza...

Glad you liked it!

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]tigs
2005-06-23 04:17 am UTC (link)
Oh, that's great!

*loves*

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]frostfire_17
2005-06-23 05:22 am UTC (link)
Thanks! Glad you liked it!

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]_tanglewood_
2005-06-23 03:33 pm UTC (link)
That was great. So funny! Love the title :D

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]frostfire_17
2005-06-25 03:42 am UTC (link)
Thanks! And you're not alone--the title's been perhaps more popular than the story...

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]teand
2005-06-23 05:35 pm UTC (link)
Are we saving or almost catching them in the act today? Hee! Good question.

Nice to see Ford and Teyla get some screen time!

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]frostfire_17
2005-06-25 03:43 am UTC (link)
Thanks! I always feel bad when I send them off to do mumblewhatever while I get John and Rodney together. This is sort of an apology to the characters (who I can't write for beans, so all they can have is sillyfic. Poor them.)

Glad you liked it!

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]crystalheaven
2005-06-27 03:38 am UTC (link)
*huggles Frostfire*

Oh, this is good. Really good. Like, you nearly owed me a new computer cause I choked on my drink rather than spit it out good. *coughs slightly*

The first paragragh, with all the choices? Geniuse. Purely wonderful.

And the fact that they didn't know whether to rescue them, or catch them in the act? *dies laughing*

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]frostfire_17
2005-06-29 06:26 am UTC (link)
*blush* Thanks! Glad you liked it!

*pats you on the back* I couldn't afford to get you a new computer...although I have an old keyboard sitting on the floor next to my bed, you can have that...

(Reply to this) (Parent)

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