Plastic Tree Channel: Translations

2004/04/09 - Hasegawa Tadashi on "Miffy"

Wed, 20 Apr 2005 04:42:47 GMT

My alarm clock is a Miffy-chan one. There are different grades, though, and mine is the low-grade kind. With a high-grade one, you are awakened by Miffy's voice. When I moved into Tokyo, my younger sister gave it to me to celebrate. Apparently she was worried about what grade to get, but of course, how would it be for a man living alone to have the sound of Miffy-chan's voice playing? (*L*) I've been using it continuously since then. (Staff: I use mine but the voice is too high, and there have been complaints from nearby.) Really!? Then it turned out well for me, didn't it?

‚Q‚O‚O‚S”N‚SŒŽ‚O‚X“ú@’·’Jì@³@[ƒ~ƒbƒtƒB[]

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I apologize for the lack of updates recently. I have been very busy for the last month or so, but rest-assured that I haven't lost interest in this project. Now that my schedule is back to normal, I intend to continue with the translations. Thank you for your patience.

2003/04/18 - Sasabuchi Hiroshi on "Bathing"

Mon, 14 Mar 2005 02:43:38 GMT

It was shown on "Hakkutsu Aru Aru Dai-Jiten" that it's wrong to say that you can slim down by bathing with only your lower body submerged. The most effective way to lose weight in the bath is to soak in 41-42℃ water up to your shoulders. Then after 2 or 3 minutes, get out of the tub for about 5 minutes. Use that time to wash your hair or what have you, and repeat the process three times. After three times there's apparently no increase in effectiveness. They said they'd verify it on the show. They got ordinary people to do it, and somehow everyone lost weight!! (*L*) If I get any thinner I'll be bones, so I don't think I'll do it. (*L*) But it's supposed to be effective for oversensitivity to cold, too!! Actually, I'm really, really sensitive to cold, so I thought I might try it yesterday, but anyway the uta no ojisan (Note: Ryutaro *L*) gave me a cold and my throat hurts, so I decided maybe I shouldn't. As soon as my cold gets better I think I'll try it at the neighborhood public bath. It was a really helpful story!!

４月１８日　ササブチ　ヒロシ　[入浴]

某「発掘●●大事典」でやってたんですけど、半身浴を続けると痩せるというのは大きな間違いらしいです。お風呂でダイエットをするのに一番効率が良いのは、お湯の温度が41～42℃で、必ず肩まで浸かる。で、2～3分経ったら5分くらい湯舟から上がる。その間に頭洗ったり…そういうところで時間を有効に使って、それを3回繰り返す。あっ、3回以上やっても有効はないらしいです。で、それを番組で検証してみましょうって、一般の人がやってたわけですよ。なんと、皆さん体重減ってました!!(笑)僕はこれ以上痩せると骨になってしまうんでやろうと思わないんですが(笑)。でも、冷え症とかにも効くらしいんですよ!!実はものスゴイ冷え症だから昨日やろうかと思ったんですが、なにせ歌のオジサン(注：竜太朗の事。笑)に風邪をうつされて、ちょっとノドが痛いからやめておこうかなと。風邪が治り次第、近所の銭湯でやろうかなと思います。とても役に立つ話でした!!

2003/07/04 - Hasegawa Tadashi on "Cleaning"

Mon, 07 Mar 2005 01:29:01 GMT

My theme is "cleaning," but the truth is that I'm really bad at cleaning...Or should I say, I hardly ever do it!! To put it bluntly. Therefore, my room is just a wee bit dirty. No, not just a wee bit...It's bad. Probably. I guess it's bad (*L*). I think that depending on the person, people have their own cleaning particularities. For example, they make sure the sink is clean, or the window glass is clean, etc. I don't really have any rule like that. When I notice, I think, "I gotta take care of that pretty soon," but I don't do it regularly. If the top of the TV gets dusty, I think, "Ah, should I dust it?" The bathroom is like that too. It's never really gotten extremely dirty, has it? But I'll think that the floor or whatever has gotten dirtier and dirtier and i'll clean it for the first time. Normally, cleaning is a thing to do habitually, right? But it hasn't gotten to the point where it's like they show on TV, "People Who Can't Throw Away Their Garbage." (*L*) And when I start to clean, I become enthusiastic! So it's 0 or 1. When I start I want to clean here and there and everywhere. But after all, my cleaning pattern is that I can't throw things away, so I just move them from here to there. To me it looks tidy, but someone else would probably say, "You just moved it over here!" (*L*) It's not good, is it. Lately I've been thinking I shouldn't be like that.

７月４日　長谷川　正　[掃除]

掃除というテーマですが、実は僕はとても掃除が苦手…と言うかあまりしません!!ぶっちゃけ。よって、部屋はちょっぴりキチャナイです。いやちょっぴりじゃないな…あれは。ダメだな。多分。ダメでしょう(笑)。人によって、掃除のポイントってあると思うんですよ。例えば水回りだけは素敵にとか。窓ガラスだけは素敵にしておくとか。あんまりそういう拘りがないんですよ。目に付いたら｢そろそろやんなきゃな｣っていう感じで、日常やらないみたいな。テレビの上埃が溜まってきたら、｢あ、やっとこうか｣みたいな。お風呂場とかもそうで。あんまり極端に汚くなる事ってないじゃないですか。でも、だんだん床とかが汚くなってきたなと思ったら初めてやる。普通は掃除って習慣的にやるもんですよね。流石にテレビとかの｢ゴミを捨てられない人｣みたいな事はないんですけど(笑)。でも、掃除はやりだすと張り切るんですよ。だから0か1か。やり出すとあれもこれもやりたくなってね。だけど結局、僕の掃除パターンっていうのは、物捨てたりって出来ないんですよ。だからここにあったものをあっちに移動したりで、自分の中では結構素敵になったんじゃないかなと思うんだけど、多分他の人が見たら｢なんだアレがあっちに移動しただけじゃん｣みたいな(笑)。イカンですよね。最近ちょっといけないなと思っています。

2003/03/21 - Arimura Ryutaro on "Livehouses"

Tue, 01 Mar 2005 02:33:55 GMT

My topic is working in a livehouse. For people who, whatever the work and despite having no ill-intentions, just can't keep a job, I think maybe they should start by working in a livehouse. First of all, whatever your attitude you won't be badgered about it. But maybe that's just the livehouse where I worked part-time. (*L*) In service industries, usually if you obviously display a pissed off or apathetic attitude, someone will get angry with you, won't they? But at a livehouse they won't say anything. An apathetic attitude rather suits a livehouse I think. (*L*) There's no livehouse where they cheerfully shout, "Irasshaimase~!!" Honestly, at the Chiba livehouse where I worked, the staff was a blown-together drift of no-good Chiba band people who couldn't keep any other job. (*L*)

Also, because at a livehouse you can see many kinds of bands, I guess it was easier for me to know not only that I wanted to be in a band, but also in what musical direction I wanted to go. I didn't know just from listening to CDs, but hearing the sound live in a livehouse, I could tell, "This is not for me," or whatever. I think it was good that I worked there before I had become set on being a musician.

At that time, whatever part-time job I did, I was soon fired. Even as I was being called garbage, called a worthless human being, called one thing or another, the manager who let me keep working at the livehouse really did a great thing for me as a person. He set me straight, and I'm grateful. Come to think of it--Manager, please become an adult, too. (*L*) It's a place of valuable memories.

３月２１日　有村　竜太朗　[ライヴハウス]

テーマはライヴハウスでの仕事です。どんな仕事も、悪気はないのに続かないっていう人は、まずはライヴハウスのお仕事から始めたら良いんじゃないかなって思います。まず、どんな態度でもガタガタ言われない。僕がバイトしていたライブハウスだけかもしれないんですけど(笑)。接客業、だから普通はムカついた態度とかやる気ない態度とかをあからさまに出すと怒られるじゃないですか。でも、ライヴハウスだと何も言われないんですよ。ヤル気のない態度くらいがライブハウスっぽくていいのかなと(笑)。変に元気良く｢いらっしゃいませ～!!｣みたいなライヴハウスはないじゃないですか。本当に、僕が働いていた千葉のライヴハウスはどの仕事をやっても続かない、千葉のダメバンド人間達が集ってた吹き溜まりでした(笑)。

あと、ライヴハウスはいろいろなバンドを観れるから、自分がバンドをやる上では方向性が分かりやすくなるかな。CDだけ聴いてても分からないけど、ライヴハウスで生の音を聴いて、｢これは自分に向いてないな｣とか。僕自身の音楽性が定まってない頃にバイトしてたから、それは良かったかなって思います。

その頃は、どんなバイトをやってもすぐクビになってたんですよ。そんな僕をクズ呼ばわり、ダメ人間呼ばわりしながらも、なんだかんだ言ってずっと働かせてくれた店長には本当に人間的に大きくしてもらったな、更正してもらったなと、感謝してます。今思えば、店長さんも大人になって下さい(笑)。大事な思いでの場所です。

Introduction

Mon, 28 Feb 2005 03:17:04 GMT

From the fall of 2001 until the summer of 2004, Plastic Tree had an official website called Plastic Tree Channel only viewable to subscribing members via mobile phone. It cost 300 yen plus tax per month and was initially only available on docomo i-mode equipped phones, later becoming available on au ezweb and later still on the then j-phone, now Vodafone system. It was part of the the FC Forum site which was made of various other bands'--most but not all Sweet Heart bands--official mobile sites, each with a separate charge. The now defunct FC Forum was affiliated with the still active PokeShock, which has similar content--news, downloadables, special ticket reservations, etc.--but for a variety of visual bands, for a fee of course . PokeShock is run by the same company that does the magazine Zy. PokeShock is advertised in Zy and Zy on PokeShock. The cd-extra supplement to Zy even has passwords to unlock special content on the PokeShock site (and formerly the FC Forum site as well).

So where am I going with this? I realize most of you are either already aware of or not interested in these details. The point I want to make is that it's this kind of collusion that makes me refer to Sweet Heart, Sweet Child and all the various subdivisions as the Evil Empire.

But getting back to Plastic Tree Channel, the site was updated every Friday. Among other things, the members took turns writing a short column on various subjects chosen from among those suggested by readers. When the site was updated, in addition to the new column there would be a link to the previous week's. Older columns were removed. I subscribed to the site from spring of 2002 until it closed, and at the beginning my Japanese was very poor. I decided I wanted to save the columns, hoping that eventually they would make more sense to me. As there was no way to cut and paste, and my phone's memory was limited, that meant laboriously typing them out, having to look up all the kanji I didn't know. Because this was so time consuming, and sometimes I forgot or just couldn't be bothered, I don't have every single column, but I do have a lot of them.

I started this community to give me a place to post my translations. My intention is to post one a week, on Monday or Tuesday (Japan time). I am not going to be posting them in chronological order, because I am not translating them in chronological order. Basically, I translate whichever catches my fancy, provided that I feel reasonably confident of my ability to translate it. I do intend to try to do a mix of all four members' columns, because the fandom is, I think, overly focused on Ryutaro, I really want to give everyone a glimpse of the others' personalities. Unfortunately, Akira's columns, while being the most interesting to me personally, are also the most difficult to understand, so I'm afraid there will be rather fewer of those.

Comments are of course welcome. Impressions are preferable to a thank you, but so long as I know people are reading, I'll be happy. If anything in my translations is unclear or you simply want more context, please feel free to ask questions.

If you would like to read the Japanese along with the translation, please comment here. If there's enough interest, I will include the Japanese, in which case I would be open to constructive criticism.

The first translation will be posted tomorrow.