I was riding home IN THE RAIN and a taxi opened it's door INTO THE BIKE LANE, ABOUT 1 METRE IN FRONT OF WHERE I WAS RIDING. So, by instinct, I swerved - into the edge of the car lane. This is on a major and fairly busy road. So I'm pretty glad there wasn't a car there, because I might well have gone ka-splat! and I do not want to go ka-splat!, at least not yet. Needless to say, I immediate stopped singing the song I was composing as I rode along (it was a song about all the porn I was going to write when I got home) and I said a cuss word or two.

So, to celebrate the avoidance of the second near-death of the week (the first being the potential death by cheese on the weekend) (wait, is it the avoidance of a near-death or just death? because by nature a 'near-death' is death-avoided), er, anyway...

A POLL about something I've been thinking of today. You don't need to be an Australian to answer this poll, even though it relates to a former Australian Prime Minister. IF THAT SOUNDS BORING, DON'T GO AWAY! First, it may be relevant for you to watch this clip which is taken from the highly factual - though hilarious and quite homoerotic - musical about the political career of said Prime Minister, Paul Keating:

We enjoyed Keating! The musical on the screen in Fedo Square last night and nixwilliams raised something I hadn't contemplated before - that Paul Keating, was, is, perhaps gay! The man himself was at the show and was dragged up on stage at the end for some loltastic dancing. And he was looking a bit gay for the man who performed himself in the show. Which is fair enough really, because he (the character and the actor) was A SPUNK-RAT. (Which is actually a quite disturbing term when you think about it) Anyway, I open it to you guys:

Poll #1245641 i need to know the answer
Open to: All, detailed results viewable to: All

Paul Keating is:

ticky-box?

Current Mood: ALIIIIIIIVE!

I saw The Dark Knight with nixwilliams and daniel_bethany last night. I enjoyed it though I had a couple of quibbles: a) the action scenes went on for AGES, omg enough already, get back to Gazza!, and b) why was there not more hot man-on-man action??!??!?!? I want a refund. Wasn't the full title Batman's Dark Night of Passionate Gay Love (and when we saying 'Love' we mean 'Hot hot sex', and when we say 'Batman' we actually mean 'Gordon') - or did I misread it? I was going to add something spoilery, but I won't. Maybe there is one person out there who hasn't seen it yet and still wants to? Anyone? No?

However, the WEIRDEST thing about the whole experience was that I WASN'T TERRIFIED OF GARY OLDMAN'S MOUSTACHE. NOT EVEN A LITTLE BIT. I actually came to like it by the end of the movie. Perhaps because it was attached to Gary Oldman and you may or may not know that I rather enjoy a little bit of Gary every now and again. Every time he was onscreen I made grabby hands at the screen (Nix can attest to this). I did have a moment of wondering whether his moustache was going to try spawning with Morgan Freeman's moustache, but then I was distracted WITH TERROR by Morgan Freeman's bow tie. Bow ties are never alright in casual dress, in everyday dress, in business dress. THEY ARE BASICALLY NEVER ALRIGHT UNLESS YOU ARE WEARING A TUXEDO. PLEASE, MORGAN FREEMAN, LEARN THAT. PLEASE, EVERYONE, LEARN THAT.

Obligatory mention of Heath Ledger: he was unrecognisable and amazing and hilarious and terrifying all at once. Almost as terrifying as Morgan Freeman's bow tie.

Hence, got home rather late last night, slept in this morning, still have not done anything productive with the day. Mean to do some writing, as well as other, more tedious, chores. I need to learn this and remember it: one can do stuff first and read flist later. One can write first and read flist later. Flist will wait. Reading flist is not urgent. When will I learn that? Maybe I need to write it on an icon and make that my default icon so that when I log into LJ that is the first thing I'll see.

Tags: a pearl of wisdom, films, gary oldman, gary oldman's mo: dangerous or harmless?, what was it i'm meant to be doing?

( You are about to view content that may not be appropriate for minors. )

Tags: canada, friends are awesome, giant concrete turkey library of doom, icons

-some more-than-lol-worthy Top Gear macros by sunlightdances. (some, er, adult themes.)

-i lolled at this comic by nedroidcomics ( it's also here, beneath the cut )

actually, that's all i got with links for lolz. i do have new pants (trousers not undies, if any of you happen to be confused) and they were only $20! bargain. one press-stud was broken, so i made a sad face and the girl reduced them from the already sale price of $30 to $20. win. i feel i could become annie hall in these pants, with the right accessories. sorry for just using the word 'accessories' there you guys. it's almost like i'm about to come out and say: "don't theorise, accessorise!" oh wow, look i just said it.

today i suggested to my boss that the shop get a cat and we train the cat to sit on my feet to keep them warm. because my feet were frikkin' freezing today and a cat in a cheese shop, how cute would that be?! OH&S what, you say?

anyway, speaking of cats, further lolz for you because i love you:

more cat pictures
( + 10 MOAR. IT WERE GUD DAY AT ICANHASCHEEZBURGER.COM TODAY )

Tags: cats, for the lulz, webcomics

snagged from bubbles_san

What Is Your Battle Cry?

Rampaging over the plains, carrying two hardened pitas, cometh Johnnypurple! And she gives an ominous cry: "I'm going to contort you until you're translucent!"

Find out! Enter username: Are you a girl, or a guy ?

created by beatings : powered by monkeys

now i'm going to eat my weight in cheese. that is the aim. if you never hear from me again, then you know that i have achieved my aim and died as a result, or died trying. but i will have died happy, so may that bring you joy in your grief.

Tags: meme

I'll stop spamming your flists now, I just wanted to get these up before I got back to 'A Saga of Stiggyness.'

Title: The Haunting of the Hamster
Summary: Richard's not scared to spend a night alone in a haunted castle. And he's certainly not afraid of the shadowy figure looming toward him.
Words: ~1200
Pairings: Richard/Jeremy, mentions of Richard/Mindy and OT3
Fandom: Top Gear
Notes: This is all Cenea's fault. Also, since it's a beta post, feel free to give con crit and suggestions.
Disclaimer: Well, considering Cenea's plans to haunt Richard in his new castle, and the fact that Jeremy very probably does have those sheets, then this may actually come to pass. Till then, though, it's only fanfiction.

Tags: fanfic, top gear
Current Location: home
Current Mood: accomplished
Current Music: Arctic Monkeys

Also known as "I Blame Riona for This." And Deathy, who egged me on with the image of Jeremy snogging a Ditto that mimics into him. *shakes fist*

Title: When Plotbuneary's Attack
Fandoms: Top Gear/Pokemon
Words:~2150
Summary: It starts with a Caterpie. There's also reality breaches, Abra obsession, and lots of flaily!Stig.
Notes: This is a beta post before I put it up at tg_crack so feel free to point out any problem you see with SP&G and inconsistencies.
Disclaimer: The Top Gear gang are real, and I make no claims to know them, and I can safely say that they've never run across any Pokemon at the airfield.

Tags: fanfic, pokemon, top gear
Current Location: home
Current Mood: busy
Current Music: Arctic Monkeys

snagged from suzie. It's just occured to me I have no idea what a vorpal blade is.

Tags: quizzes
Current Location: home
Current Mood: complacent
Current Music: Arctic Monkeys