silver's good enough for me (![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small} stellawuzadiver) wrote in ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/community.gif){kind=small} ohnotheydidnt,@ 2009-10-23 22:48:00 |
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| Current music: | Life's the study of dying, how to do it right |
| Entry tags: | blind item |
Blind Vice: Meet Another Bisexual Twilight Star!
Good news! Terry Tush-Trade has a sexually uninhibited companion on the Twilight set—and how.
No, not in that way, you dirty-minded A.T. readers (for the record, Terry seems to have calmed down from when we last checked in). What we mean is that another member of the Twilight franchise is getting all kinds of frisky across the gender borders.
Meet Rocky Trailer, a good-lookin' young thing who really embraces the sex card, and deliciously (and loudly) so!
Oh, except there's one huge difference between Rocky and Terry:
Rocky doesn't give a s--t about keeping this bisexuality thing a secret.
See, R.T. is a free-loving, we're-all-young-and-horny-let's-have-fun-w
Rocky finds sexuality empowering. Although Roc may not have a gay partner now, or who knows if there was actually a really, really serious one in the past, Trailer's unapologetic about the au naturel horny feelings felt for both men and women.
And guess what? This person's identity is going to be revealed sooner rather than later!
That's right: revealed. We're told Rocky T.'s going to talk freely about it all, possibly during press for New Moon, although in the end, that's really Rock's decision, isn't it?
For the record, this isn't some gimmick publicity stunt (like New Moon really needs it). We hear that it's really because Trailer doesn't give an ef who knows the score. Labels are so overrated.
So, reporters, ya ready to ask the right questions? Sure know we are.
And it Ain't: Jackson Rathbone, Anna Kendrick, Dakota Fanning
1
Dear Ted:
Are Slink-a-Rella Jiggle and Dumbo Pecs an openly married couple or still hiding their nuptials in the closet? My mother took in two wild cats that looked to be on the verge of starving to death. It has taken her about a month, but she has finally got them into her home. Bad thing is one cat is possibly pregnant. Guess I know what I'll be getting for Christmas. Ted, you looking for another cat?
—Arabella
Dear Sweetly Disjointed:
Gotta be one of the weirdest letters I've ever received, but still love ya, babe—and what you and your mom are doing for animals. Slinky and Dumbo are happily married—at least I believe they are.
-----
Dear Ted:
Were Kristen Stewart and Nikki Reed ever dating? Maybe that's why they broke up. Kristen swung the other way and ditched Nikki.
—Supergirl
Dear K.Stew Brew:
Is this some fanfiction accidentally sent to me? Nik's outright denying her past with Robert Pattinson, does she have to start fielding K.Stew questions, too?
-----
Dear Ted:
John Mayer may be going through some mental or emotional stuff that he's not willing to face. Not that I'm a psychologist or anything but I've noticed things in friends of mine that make me wonder about their emotional state because of the things they do whether it's drugs, alcohol, sex and/or deviant behavior. Until he addresses what may be going on emotionally, we will probably see continued bad behavior from him as well as all of the other celebs who land in A.T.
—Johnson
Dear Celeb Therapist Wannabe:
His mental disorder is immaturity. He'll wise up when he finally grows up.
-----
Dear Ted:
I've been wondering about Prison Break's Wentworth Miller. He's very attractive and seems to be single. Does that hint that maybe he is not quite available to women? (If you know what I mean.)
—Mobey
Dear Wishin' for Wentworth:
He's more than available for adoring female fans to drool over him. But don't expect to get far.
-----
Dear Ted:
I am a longtime fan and I read your blolumn daily. I know you have told us that Toothy Tile's beard knows Toothy's secrets. But you have never really explained why she does what she does. Why would she pretend for so long and involve her kids? I know you say she has reasons, but what are they? Wouldn't she get tired after all this time? I would be bored to death by now. Sending love to you from the Midwest,
—JDub
Dear Goatee Gal:
She's kind of in too deep now; she's fooling even herself. Lots of women do this, really have no idea why.
-----
Dear Ted:
I just recently had a baby and while I was on maternity leave I kept up with the gossip thanks to you! So one guess I'm probably totally off...Hayden Christensen is Toothy Tile? Love always to you and your furry friends!
—Brionna
Dear Mommy:
No go on H.C. as T2, but congrats on the baby, babe! At least you've got that to celebrate if not a correct B.V. guess. Think more hairy, more mushy.
-----
Dear Ted:
Most Hollywood "bromances" have something more than friendship involved? No way! Please drop more hints or give us a Blind Vice about some of the BFFs keeping the true nature of their relationships in the closet. They should free themselves and come out. Look at Adam Lambert; tons of women are still going crazy for him.
—Banish
Dear Bromance Barriers:
Hey, I'd love it if they all came out; that means more for me! But guys can have their bromances and be straight too; I can accept that.
-----
Dear Ted:
Justin Long made a cameo when Drew Barrymore hosted SNL, same for Scarlett Johansson when her hubby, Ryan Reynolds, was on the show...getting your significant other to guest spot is all the rage these days! Would be one helluva great way to tell the world they're more than amigos. So Gerard Butler was the guest host Saturday night, and James Franco made a cameo.
—JLM
Dear Saturday Night Gay:
Love where your dirty head's at. But like Jennifer Aniston would really stop by or something? Sorry, don't think either dude would be so obvious, were they truly launching on each other, which, of course, would be so hot.
-----
Dear Ted:
Has Jake Gyllenhaal ever met Toothy Tile? Do they have friends in common perhaps?
–Truthseeker
Dear Small Town:
Of course, it's Hollywood.
-----
Dear Ted:
Recently caught up watching SNL with host Gerard Butler, and oh my gay, that was literally the gayest-themed episode ever! So enlighten us, is there some episode-themed correlation between Gerard Butler and surprise appearances by Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson and James Franco? One out of three correlations? Nada?
–Lucy
Dear Who Puts the But in Butler:
Sorry, hon, but if Franco can make time for General Hospital, he surely can for SNL. Think it was less about the hot guy and more about getting himself out there.
-----
Dear Ted
Do Toothy Tile and Nevis Divine know each other? Not just "business" know, but personally? As in "hang out"?
–Jennifer
Dear Hot Idea:
But no, they don't know know each other.
-----
Dear Ted:
Is Stinky Carrot-Crotch Seth Rogen?
–Wondering
Dear Right Idea:
Wrong B.V. for Rogen
-----
Dear Ted:
Where did Jake Gyllenhaal's indie film career go? He had such potential after Donnie Darko, et al. Does Joseph Gordon-Levitt get all the good films, or what? Can't they share?
—Chen
Dear Joe for Jake:
JGL has definitely taken the hot, hipster-loved roles away from Jakey-poo, who's given them up in favor of buffed up, more traditional fare (Prince of Persia, dating Reese). Let's cross our fingers J.G. decides to come back to what he does best—being a good actor, not some piece of goss candy.
-----
Dear Ted:
I was just looking at the recent pictures of Lindsay Lohan posing with Donatella Versace, and it's sick. She's a 23-year-old girl who looks ill and old. I'm ashamed to admit this, but her father seems to care enough (or just wants the publicity, I'm sure) to at least point out the obvious: that Lindsay needs serious help. It's so sad that her mother is still using her as a pawn in her own sick, twisted, whorish game. Do you think outing her as her a B.V. would actually do any good?
—Sharon
Dear Parent Trap:
It's clear which vices L2 has—no need for me to come out and say it. And Michael Lohan is just as bad as Dina. If he had any tact, he'd handle the matter personally and deal with his daughter one-on-one, not by sending out a press release first.
-----
Dear Ted:
Do Crescent Kumquat and Jackie Bouffant know each other, as in know each other?
—M
Dear Pretty Pair:
They definitely hang around the same scene, but as far as I know, they've never shared the same sex space. Hell, I wouldn't rule it out, tho!
-----
Dear Ted:
Are there any Hollywood movers and shakers who say they are gay but who really aren't? That would be interesting. Also, is Toothy Tile Jim Carrey?
—Arparson
Dear Gay for Pay:
Toothy's got a more serious side than Carrey. Lots of gals (funny, not so with the dudes) in H'wood love saying they're bisexual just to get some extra attention, tho I seriously doubt their affections for both sexes are equal.
-----
Dear Ted:
Was reading on article on Renée Zellweger and it listed a few of the men she has been with. My question is: Is Renée the "ultimate beard"? What is her story? I can't seem to get a good read on her. What are your thoughts?
—P>
Dear Reading Renée:
I already made my thoughts abundantly clear on Ms. Zellweger's choice in gentlemen callers, as well as her actress colleagues choosing such similar companions.
-----
Dear Ted:
Is Jensen Ackles Crescent Kumquat?
—I Think I'm Right
Dear Wrongo:
Think younger. And less attached.
-----
Dear Ted:
Isn't a sober Lindsay worth more to her mother than a strung-out Lindsay? Her potential as an actress could have earned her millions. It's shallow, but why doesn't her mother see that and get her sober, rather than leech off her meager current earnings as a strung-out addict?
—Lemon
Dear Mommy Dreariest:
Dina isn't concerned with Lindsay at all anymore, sober or not—Mama Lohan actually thinks she's the star. She even has her own friggin' shoe line! Which appears to be a bigger priority in her life than keeping tabs on her daughters
-----
Dear Ted:
I'm new to your column—but already addicted! My question is, if you say Ben Affleck is really into family life with Jen Garner (who, like you, I loathe) than why does he look so miserable in every photo op with said family? I'm sure he loves his adorable daughters—but when will he ditch her already?! Also, I saw that there is a connection between Ben and Toothy—please don't tell me Ben is Toothy Tile! He just can't be! Right?
—Lucie
Dear Happy Hubby?:
He's gloomy 'cause look who he's with! You'd be moody, too. But B.A. doesn't have to worry about being Toothy. Just how to get the hell away from tightass Garner. [Ed: Not that I couldn't buy Jennifer as an undercover bitch, but, maybe he takes a miserable candid because it means there's a paparazzo in his face and he's standing there looking like schlumpy, irrelevant 2009 Ben Affleck instead of bankable, fuckable late 1990s Ben Affleck.]
-----
Dear Ted:
Methinks it is time to let Morgan Mayhem out of the bag. Things are looking mighty grim; chick looks almost twenty years older. It would be the Christian thing to do. Low blow, I know but the whole thing is so sad in a Janis Joplin sprinkled with River Phoenix watched over by John Belushi kind of way. Tough love, man, tough love!
—pricanese
Dear Morgan Misery:
Didn't John Belushi hang at the Chateau Marmont, too? What the hell's in the vodka at that place?
-----
Dear Ted:
Do you have favorites of celebrities you choose to write about?
—dnro
Dear Playing Favorites:
Uh, Robsten much? Team Awful also loves dishing on the True Blood crew, and anytime Hugh Jackman or Taylor Lautner take their shirts off is a good day for us. Lindsay used to be fun, but now it's just depressing.
-----
Dear Ted:
Is Matt Dallas the same "orientation" as Wentworth Miller? (You know what kind of orientation I'm talking about.)
—princesspinklover
Dear Come Out With It:
Why don't you just say it? You're as secretive as both those dudes.
-----
Dear Ted:
Just curious, has Vanessa Hudgens ever been the subject of a B.V.?
—mookie
Dear High School Gossip:
No, but her friends sure have!
-----
Dear Ted:
Please help settle an argument. If Vin Diesel walked into a room and saw two half-naked men, would he (a) run like hell or (b) smile and close the door?
—gorilla
Dear Naked Ambition:
Even though I've worn far-too-tight T-shirts at parties where I chatted with Vin—and he sure didn't seem to want to bolt—I still think you should ask him, don't you?
-----
Dear Ted:
John Mayer is known for bringing "bathroom activities" into the bedroom. Does that mean Jennifer Aniston doesn't mind getting "dirty"?
—Trish and Connie
Dear Porcelain Habits:
She dated the yucky dude twice. Obviously she isn't as uptight as people think she is.
Scorecard:
-Crescent Kumquat is not Adam Levine, Adrien Grenier, Cam Gigandet, Corbin Bleu, Jackson Rathbone, Jensen Ackles, John Mayer, Kellan Lutz, Penn Badgley, Robert Pattinson, Taylor Kitsch, or Zac Efron.
-Crotch Uh-Lastic is not Adam Brody, Christian Bale, Diddy, Derek Hough, John Mayer, Josh Hartnett, Kevin Spacey, Matthew Broderick, Matthew McConaughey, Robert Downey Jr., Ryan Gosling, Ryan Philippe, The Rock, Tobey Maguire, Tom Hanks, or Topher Grace.
-Dumbo Pecs is not Hank Baskett, Jay-Z, Josh Duhamel or Nick Cannon. Slink-a-Rella Jiggle is not Beyoncé, Kendra Wilkinson or Mariah Carey.
-Jackie Bouffant is not Bradley Cooper, Channing Tatum, Kellan Lutz, Nick Jonas or Taylor Kitsch.
-Morgan Mayhem is Lindsay Lohan, but is "officially" not Gina Gershon, Hilary Swank, Keira Knightley, Lara Flynn Boyle, Mischa Barton, Nicky Hilton, Nicole Richie, Paris Hilton, Queen Latifah, Tara Reid or Whitney Houston.
-Nevis Divine is not Alexander Skarsgård, Alex O'Loughlin, Austin Nichols, Bradley Cooper, Chace Crawford, Channing Tatum, Chris Evans, Colin Farrell, Corbin Bleu, Daniel Radcliffe, David Boreanaz, Diego Luna, Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson, Ed Westwick, Edward Norton, Emile Hirsch, Eric Bana, Gael García Bernal, George Clooney, Gerard Butler, Hayden Christensen, Hugh Grant, Hugh Jackman, Jake Gyllenhaal, James Franco, James McAvoy, Jim Sturgess, John Mayer, Johnathan Rhys Meyers, Joshua Jackson, Justin Bartha, Keanu Reeves, Kellan Lutz, Kevin Connolly, Matt Dallas, Michael Cera, Mike Myers, Olivier Martinez, Orlando Bloom, Penn Badgley, Robert Buckley, Rodrigo Santoro, Ryan Kwanten, Ryan Reynolds, Sebastian Stan, Shia LaBeouf, Simon Baker, Stephen Moyer, Viggo Mortensen, Will Smith, or Zac Efron.
-Stinky Carrot-Crotch is not Jason Segel, John Krasinski, Jon Hamm, Matt Stone, Sam Trammell, Seth Rogen or Zach Braff.
-Super Duper Cooper is not Chace Crawford, Chris Evans, Chris Rock, Christian Bale, Derek Jeter, Kiefer Sutherland, Matthew McConaughey, Nick Lachey, Orlando Bloom, Pete Wentz, R. Kelly, Ryan Gosling, Tom Brady, Tommy Lee, or Tony Romo.
-Terry Tush-Trade is not Ashley Greene, Billy Burke, Catherine Hardwick, Chris Weitz, Christian Serratos, Dakota Fanning, Elizabeth Reaser, Jackson Rathbone, Justin Chon, Kellan Lutz, Megan Fox, Michael Welch, Peter Facinelli, Rachelle Lefevre, Sarah Clarke, or Taylor Lautner. Or a dude, for that matter.
-Toothy Tile isn't 50 Cent, Aaron Eckhart, Adam Brody, Adrian Grenier, Adrien Brody, All 3 Jonas Brothers, Anderson Cooper, Andy Dick, Ashton Kutcher, Ben Affleck, Ben Mackenzie, Bill Clinton, Bradley Cooper, Brad Pitt, Brandon Davis, Brian Austin Green, Carrot Top, Casey Affleck, Chad Michael Murray, Channing Tatum, Chris Evans, Chris Klein, Chris Pine, Christian Bale, Clay Aiken, Colin Farrell, Dane Cook, Daniel Craig, Danny Bonaduce, David Duchovny, David Hyde Pierce, David Schwimmer, David Spade, Denzel Washington, Derek Jeter, Dick Cheney, Don Cheadle, Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson, Eddie Murphy, Elijah Wood, Emile Hirsch, Eric Balfour, Gael García Bernal, George Clooney, George Eads, Gerard Butler, Haley Joel Osment, Harrison Ford, Harry Hamlin, Hayden Christensen, Heath Ledger, Hillary Clinton, Homer Simpson, Hugh Jackman, Isaiah Washington, James Franco, James Marsden, Jamie Foxx, Jared Leto, Jared Padalecki, Jason Lee, Jason Statham, Jennifer Garner, Jeremy Piven, Jesse Metacalfe, Jim Carrey, Joaquin Phoenix, Joel McHale, John C. Reilly, John Krasinski, John Stamos, John Travolta, Josh Brolin, Josh Duhamel, Josh Hartnett, Josh Lucas, Julian McMahon, Justin Timberlake, Keanu Reeves, Kellan Lutz, Kenny Chesney, Kevin Spacey, Kiefer Sutherland, Lance Bass, Leonardo DiCaprio, Liev Schrieber, Luke Wilson, Mario Lopez, Mark Ruffalo, Mark Wahlberg, Matt Damon, Matt Dillon, Matt LeBlanc, Matthew Broderick, Matthew McConaughey, Matthew Perry, Michael Angarano, Michael Vartan, Mike Myers, Milo Ventimiglia, Neil Patrick Harris, Nikki Reed, Orlando Bloom, Owen Wilson, Peter Facinelli, Queen Latifah, Ricky Martin, Rob Thomas, Robert Buckley, Robert Pattinson, Ronaldo, Ryan Cabrera, Ryan Gosling, Ryan Reynolds, Scott Speedman, Sean Penn, Sean William Scott, Seth Green, Shane West, Shemar Moore, Shia LeBeouf, Spencer Pratt, Steven Weber, T.R. Knight, Taylor Lautner, Ted Danson, Tobey Maguire, Tom Cruise, Tom Welling, Topher Grace, Usher, Val Kilmer, Viggo Mortensen, Vin Diesel, Vince Vaughn, Wentworth Miller, Will Smith, Wilmer Valderama, Zac Efron, Zach Braff, or Zachary Quinto. Grey Goose is not Anderson Cooper, Chris Pine, George Clooney, Jensen Ackles, Mario Lopez, Matt Dillon, Mel Gibson, Peter Sarsgaard, Ryan Gosling, Tom Cruise, or Zachary Quinto.
-Twyla Babe-Sucker is not Anna Kendrick, AnnaLynne McCord, Ashley Greene, Dakota Fanning, Elizabeth Reaser, Nikki Reed, Noot Seear or Rachelle Lafevre.
2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7
