| silver's good enough for me ( @ 2008-08-12 02:07:00 |
Courtesy of Nerve.com

50. Jennifer Lopez, "I'm Glad" (2003)
This Jennifer Beals/Jennifer Lopez hybrid proves to be music-video alchemy. J. Lo's third single may be long forgotten by top-forty radio, but fans won't forget the video, which features choreography by Jeffrey Hornaday, who reprises his work from Flashdance.
49. Rilo Kiley, "The Frug" (1999)
Rilo Kiley were unknown at the time of this song's release. It was only through this video, and the song's inclusion in a long-forgotten Christina Ricci film, that they were signed to a record label. Jenny Lewis can sing to us from her bedroom anytime.
48. Tim Deluxe, "It Just Won't Do" (2001)
We'd never heard of Tim Deluxe until we saw this video. Turns out, he's a British dance producer, as well as the dude in the lawn chair reading a copy of The Origin of Species. But there's something strangely hypnotic about this video, and it's not just the panty-less ass in the leopard-print loincloth. Is it the never-ending slow-motion struts across the stadium floor? The athleticism? Or the fact that the video remains strangely fixated on the referee's calls: Sorry, missy, that ball was outside the line!
47. U2, "All I Want is You" (1989)
Possibly the most romantic video on this list, this rarely seen but essential early-MTV staple features a climax (not the sexual kind, unfortunately) in which a little person (played by a not-yet-famous Peter Dinklage) working as a circus freak appears to kill himself over his impossible love for a trapeze artist. Does she strip for him? Or for her boyfriend, the Strong Man?
46. God-des & She, "Lick It" (2007)
God-des & She are lesbian hip-hoppers from New York who have yet to make it really big, but this song kills and the video is off the hook. Featuring the prolific drag king Murray Hill as the sex instructor, it makes us want to laugh out loud and take a cold shower at the same time. The game of "pin the g-spot on the vagina" is just one of many things that got this banned from MTV.
45. Tom Petty & the Heartbreakers, "Into the Great Wide Open" (1991)
This is an essential inclusion for, if nothing else, the presence of Johnny Depp and Burn Notice's Gabrielle Anwar. But there's also a barrage of fun cameos, including by Terence Trent D'Arby, Faye Dunaway, Chynna Phillips of Wilson Phillips, and Matt LeBlanc.
44. Justin Timberlake, "What Goes Around . . . Comes Around" (2007)
An epically pretentious production, but Justin and Scarlett seducing each other has got to count for something. Directed by the same guy who did "Smells Like Teen Spirit" and co-written with Nick Cassavetes, this is actually more a short film in the vein of old Michael Jackson videos with big-name directors like Martin Scorsese.
43. Björk, "Pagan Poetry" (2001)
Björk's personal brand of abstract sexuality is slathered all over this video. We're also big fans of "All Is Full of Love" and "It's Oh So Quiet," each one showcasing the ultimate in lovelorn, weird-girl hotness.
42. MSTRKRFT, "Easy Love" (2006)
MSTRKRFT's video for Easy Love is sure to color your next trip to Jamba Juice in erotic overtones. A clever half-ironic take on videos that employ the sexy buttoned-up-secretary cliché, the straw-between-the-lips closeup and the superfluous use of allegedly alluring fluids. And yet, we're still turned on.
41. Beastie Boys, "No Sleep Till Brooklyn" (1987)
They were never conventional sex symbols, but when we were in high school, the Beasties gave all the cocky, goofball, do-anything-for-a-laugh class clowns that we were attracted to a serious run for their money.
40. Poison, "Fallen Angel" (1988)
This is the story of a nice, small-town girl who gets sucked up and spat out by the Hollywood star system. Bret Michaels seems to rail against this in the song, but the video glorifies and exploits her anyway. Meta! In the end, she kicks the pervy producer in the balls, changes back into her original outfit and rides off into the sunset with Bret, destined to be dumped in time for the first season of Rock of Love.
39. Kylie Minogue, "Spinning Around" (2000)
More like writhing around (on the floor, the couch, the bar...) If you've ever wondered why the" Loco-Motion" chanteuse is a huge sex symbol everywhere but in the U.S., watch this.
38. Def Leppard, "Photograph" (1983)
Girls in cages, Marilyn Monroe impersonators, sexy black-and-white alleyway encounters... and maybe a bit too much Def Leppard, but whatever. Produced by Mutt Lange, former producer for AC/DC (street cred!) and future husband of Shania Twain (we take that back.)
37. David Bowie, "Boys Keep Swinging" (1979)
"When you're a boy, other boys check you out." That troublesome little line convinced RCA not to release Bowie’s '79 single in the U.S., and was censored by NBC when he performed the song on Saturday Night Live. But the video is well remembered for other, more important reasons. As one YouTube commenter put it, "[Bowie’s] the only guy I know that can look good in a dress."
36. Rick James, "Give It to Me Baby" (1991)
Let’s be honest: Rick James is terrifying. But once this video gets going, you'll see why we had to include it. This sort of shamelessness deserves recognition.
35. Heart, "All I Want to Do is Make Love to You" (1990)
She picks up a stranger, he shows her what a woman is capable of, she ditches him the next morning, thanking him for impregnating her. Rawr! The Wilson Sisters were sexier in their '70s hard-rock heyday, but this video went a long way toward offsetting the distinctly unsexy yuppie rock of their later years.
34. Duran Duran, "Hungry Like the Wolf" (1982)
The song responsible for launching Duran Duran in America comes complete with a pretty sweet video. This one does take a while to get going, however. If you're not a fan, you might want to skip to about 2:50 and the sex scene that gives a whole new meaning to the term "animalistic."
33. Madonna, "Like a Prayer" (1990)
One of the most controversial — and, according to MTV viewers, "most groundbreaking" — videos ever made, "Like a Prayer" depicts Madonna, patron saint of the inappropriate, getting it on with Saint Martin de Porres, the "black Jesus." The video sparked mass protests by Christian organizations, and prompted Pepsi to drop Madonna as a spokeswoman; she later publicly thanked the soda-pop company for giving the video so much publicity.
32. Rihanna, "Umbrella" (2007)
Even if you're as sick of hearing this song as we are, the video remains undeniably hot. Dancing en pointe is not something you see much of in music videos, and the mix of jazz-era stage work with MTV-era gyration is unexpectedly sexy.
31. Janet Jackson, "That's the Way Love Goes" (1993)
Janet's lead-off video for her sex-centered '93 album (a major smash) was a romantic, sweeping change in direction for the woman who brought the world the abstinence-promoting "Let’s Wait Awhile." No wonder Jackson comes off as so angelic and lovely here — the video was directed by her ex-husband, who clearly still has feelings for her.
30. Van Halen, "Hot for Teacher" (1984)
Geeky boy unwound by hot female authority figure? Check. High-school boredom alleviated by spontaneous mob mentality? Check. A classic, pure and simple, with a few surprisingly inventive scenes, like the long library-table strut, and the epilogue that tells us, in brilliant '80s-movie fashion, what everyone "went on" to do later.
29. She & Him, "Why Do You Let Me Stay Here?" (2008)
Why we're nerds: We find Zooey Deschanel's outfits — cowgirl, go-go-booted bride — way sexier than Britney Spears' Catholic schoolgirl.
28. Bruce Springsteen, "Dancing in the Dark" (1984)
Springsteen went from nerdy savior of rock-and-roll to full-blown megastar and hunky teen idol with this first video from 1984's Born In The USA. Of course, everyone remembers Courteney Cox's breakthrough performance as "extra #84,206" in this Brian De Palma-directed video, which manages to feel gargantuan and intimate at the same time.
27. Tom Waits, "The One That Got Away" (1976)
From 1976's Small Change album, video is also the only Academy Award winner on our list, thanks to its then-inventive use of rotoscoping, a process rarely seen again until the 2001 Richard Linklater film Waking Life. Tom Waits tangos with a stripper, smokes, improvises lyrics and mumbles, and is so caught up in himself that he loses her to a thug in a sleek new car, just after she takes off her top.
26. Shakira, "Hips Don't Lie" (2006)
Not since "Baby Got Back" has one particular part of the anatomy been so thoroughly, um, celebrated. This video makes us want to move to South America so we can be around people who dance like this, dress like this and party like this at all times.
25. Blondie, "Hangin' on the Telephone" (1978)
Our favorite Debbie Harry story was cruelly debunked, but Harry swore it happened at the time, so we'll relate it anyway: She was walking home through the Village one night after waitressing at Max's Kansas City. As usual, some guy offered her a ride. (The name Blondie came from guys cat-calling her from their cars.) She accepted, but got creeped out and vaulted out of the car at a red light. Later, she saw the man's mugshot on TV: it was Ted Bundy.
24. En Vogue, "Giving Him Something He Can Feel" (1992)
En Vogue took the style of Motown and updated it with this cover of a song originally written and produced by Curtis Mayfield for the 1976 film, Sparkle. Aretha Franklin provided the vocals for that movie (inspired by the Supremes), and En Vogue transforms her giddy, sunshiny rendition into something sultry and feline.
23. Fiona Apple, "Criminal" (1996)
From the Tidal album, Apple has said this track is about "feeling bad for getting something so easily by using your sexuality." We're not going to lie: the line between sexy and creepy gets a little blurry here. Maybe it's the way Apple — who The New Yorker once described as "an underfed Calvin Klein model" — glares into the searchlight with those heroin-chic eyes.
22. Prince, "The Greatest Romance Ever Sold" (1999)
Mr. Sexy MF has videos that are more erotic than this one (almost all of which have been removed from the internet), but "Greatest Romance" is the one diehard devotees clamor after the most, if the rabid fandom on the Prince.org message boards is to be believed.
21. D'Angelo, "How Does It Feel" (2000)
D'Angelo has been called a modern-day Prince (a claim Prince fans no doubt consider the highest form of treason), mainly because of his unabashed habit of fucking the camera with his eyes. In this, he fucks it with his whole, enormous body, but it's the totally unchecked, frothy orgasm he whips himself into near the end that gets him a spot on this list.
20. Cyndi Lauper, "She Bop" (1984)
The song about female masturbation that helped usher in the now-ubiquitous "Parental Advisory" sticker, "She Bop" and its accompanying video were a classic example of coding. The vibrating motorcycle, the "self-service" gas station, Sigmund Freud, and Cyndi dancing with sunglasses and a cane (geddit?) were genius. The only misfire — surely demanded by MTV execs — was subbing in the tamer Beefcake magazine for Blueboy, the gay-porn mag that’s actually mentioned in the lyrics.
19. Shakira , "La Tortura" (2005)
The most successful Spanish-language single ever recorded is accompanied here by a pretty hot (and surprisingly non-creepy) peeping-tom storyline. Don’t try it at home.
18. Iggy Pop, "Candy" (1990)
Was this the best duet of the '90s? It's hard to imagine anything so sexy, romantic and catchy earning a rung on the Top 40 anymore, particularly since you'd never be able to see the video anywhere. And the video is, in part, what made it such a heavily-requested tune: a shirtless Iggy and the mere presence of Kate Pierson. Since they only appear on screen together through trick photography, the sexual charge between them is even better than it would've been if they'd gotten all '80s duet-y and sung into each other's eyes.
17. TLC, "Red Light Special" (1995)
This song is actually about oral sex and menstruation, but don't let that distract you from how smokin’ TLC were in their heyday. Directed by Matthew Rolston, this video is set in a brothel, and Lisa "Left Eye" Lopes, always the hot tomboy of the group, plays the pimp with aplomb. Left Eye, who died in a car accident in 2002, was one of the first musicians to make safe-sex sexy — her condom eyeglasses were her trademark and, natch, a source of controversy.
16. Chris Isaak, "Baby Did A Bad Bad Thing" (1995)
In 1999, VH1, still marketing itself to the Boomer crowd, aired two versions of this video: a tamer one before nine p.m., and the one seen here after that. French supermodel Laetitia Casta donned a black wig to play the TV seductress, and Isaak’s '50s-greaser look blended perfectly with the roadside-motel milieu.
15. Aerosmith, "Sweet Emotion" (1975)
This may be the most verbally explicit video we ever saw on the old MTV. A phone sex hotline, in all its glory, with an unforgettable ending.
14. Marvin Gaye, "Sexual Healing" (1982)
This pre-MTV gem comes complete with opening credits and a storyline that holds up better than many from the high-budget videos of the '80s. Each time we see this, we think how tragic it was that we never got to see a video from Gaye's "distinguished gray" period.
13. a-ha, "Take On Me" (1985)
When we were kids, every girl in the neighborhood thought this video was incredibly hot. Reached via phone, each one of these girls pretended not to remember us. Regardless, millions of girls and boys bought this record in 1985, and almost every one of them did so because of this video, which remains one of the best-known in the MTV archives.
12. The Police, "Don't Stand So Close To Me" (1980)
Sting once said that this song is based on a true story from his earlier career as a teacher, alleging (quite plausibly) that his students sometimes developed crushes on him. It’s a great play on the dicey nature of student-teacher attraction; Sting’s wholesomeness keeps it from going too squirmy.
11. Joan Jett and the Blackhearts, "I Love Rock 'n Roll" (1981)
Originally shot in color, Joan somehow knew it would be all the nastier in grainy black-and-white. It’s still one of the thirty biggest songs ever, according to Billboard, the chart on which this spent seven weeks.
10. Britney Spears, "I'm a Slave 4 U" (2001)
Say what you will about Ms. Spears, this 2001 video is permanently filed away in the dirty minds of straight men the world over. Intended to shift Spears's image from girl-next-door to depraved, totally accessible sex symbol, it was an unarguable success on that front, if only for a while.
9. B-52s, "Love Shack" (1989)
If a better time was ever had in a music video, we don't know when it was. The unrestrained exuberance seen here is not something often found on MTV. Campy sexual energy made groovy by way of pure, delightful geeking out.
8. George Michael, "Freedom! '90" (1984)
Linda Evangelista, Cindy Crawford, Naomi Campbell, Tatjana Patitz and Christy Turlington are here to distract you from the fact that at no time does George Michael actually appear in this video (though a somewhat George Michael-ish looking double writhes in partial shadow). Michael's refusal to participate was part of a general rebellion at the time — he'd recently split from Wham!, and had had numerous conflicts with Sony Music over the production of his previous album, Listen Without Prejudice.
7. Chris Isaak, "Wicked Game" (1989)
If you don't remember this one, you're too young to be watching many of the videos on this list. Directed by Herb Ritts, it features a topless Isaak and a topless-but-never-totally-exposed Helena Christensen wrapped in each other's arms in teasing black-and-white. David Lynch directed an alternate, less-racy version comprised of scenes from his movie, Wild At Heart.
6. Billy Idol, "Cradle of Love" (1990)
During the time it aired, many guys considered this the sexiest video on MTV. Long imitated, never equaled, this utterly pointless story of a computer nerd who gets a visit from a hottie looking to show him some dance routines (huh?) features the sexiest split ever. Directed by David Fincher, who went on to glory with Seven, Fight Club, and Zodiac.
5. Aerosmith, "Cryin'" (1993)
A video so hot it made a movie star out of Alicia Silverstone. Some prefer the follow-up, "Crazy," with Alicia and Liv Tyler swimming in their underwear, but that always seemed like a rip-off of this one to us.
4. Madonna, "Justify My Love" (1990)
Banned by MTV and defended by Madonna on Nightline, "Justify My Love" eventually became the #1 video single of all time. And though we have no idea what a "video single" is, this clip probably best represents the '80s Madonna: all melodrama and angst, rubbing and writhing on the floor in a fit of uncontrollable lust. It all seems a little silly until you notice you're completely aroused.
3. Prince, "Little Red Corvette" (1983)
The split Prince does just before the two minute mark just might be the sexiest nanosecond in the history of the world. And we have it on good authority that Prince is pointing at you. Yes, you.
2. J. Geils Band, "Centerfold" (1980)
We're embarrassed to say this cheesy video was one of the reasons we turned on MTV late at night. Peter Wolf's homeroom girls are actually random dancers from a studio in the same building where the shoot took place, and no, MTV's original VJ Martha Quinn was not, as was long rumored, among them.
1. Robert Palmer, "Addicted To Love" (1985)
An argument for the ages: Is this Palmer's sexiest video, or does that honor belong to "Simply Irresistible"? After much debate, we settled on this one — a monument to '80s deadpan sexuality. The models, which appeared in three other Palmer videos, aren't even trying to look like they're playing the instruments. According to VH1's Pop-Up Video, a musician was hired to teach them basic guitar-fingering techniques, but gave up after an hour.
So what do you think, ONTD? What's missing?
Source

50. Jennifer Lopez, "I'm Glad" (2003)
This Jennifer Beals/Jennifer Lopez hybrid proves to be music-video alchemy. J. Lo's third single may be long forgotten by top-forty radio, but fans won't forget the video, which features choreography by Jeffrey Hornaday, who reprises his work from Flashdance.
49. Rilo Kiley, "The Frug" (1999)
Rilo Kiley were unknown at the time of this song's release. It was only through this video, and the song's inclusion in a long-forgotten Christina Ricci film, that they were signed to a record label. Jenny Lewis can sing to us from her bedroom anytime.
48. Tim Deluxe, "It Just Won't Do" (2001)
We'd never heard of Tim Deluxe until we saw this video. Turns out, he's a British dance producer, as well as the dude in the lawn chair reading a copy of The Origin of Species. But there's something strangely hypnotic about this video, and it's not just the panty-less ass in the leopard-print loincloth. Is it the never-ending slow-motion struts across the stadium floor? The athleticism? Or the fact that the video remains strangely fixated on the referee's calls: Sorry, missy, that ball was outside the line!
47. U2, "All I Want is You" (1989)
Possibly the most romantic video on this list, this rarely seen but essential early-MTV staple features a climax (not the sexual kind, unfortunately) in which a little person (played by a not-yet-famous Peter Dinklage) working as a circus freak appears to kill himself over his impossible love for a trapeze artist. Does she strip for him? Or for her boyfriend, the Strong Man?
46. God-des & She, "Lick It" (2007)
God-des & She are lesbian hip-hoppers from New York who have yet to make it really big, but this song kills and the video is off the hook. Featuring the prolific drag king Murray Hill as the sex instructor, it makes us want to laugh out loud and take a cold shower at the same time. The game of "pin the g-spot on the vagina" is just one of many things that got this banned from MTV.
45. Tom Petty & the Heartbreakers, "Into the Great Wide Open" (1991)
This is an essential inclusion for, if nothing else, the presence of Johnny Depp and Burn Notice's Gabrielle Anwar. But there's also a barrage of fun cameos, including by Terence Trent D'Arby, Faye Dunaway, Chynna Phillips of Wilson Phillips, and Matt LeBlanc.
44. Justin Timberlake, "What Goes Around . . . Comes Around" (2007)
An epically pretentious production, but Justin and Scarlett seducing each other has got to count for something. Directed by the same guy who did "Smells Like Teen Spirit" and co-written with Nick Cassavetes, this is actually more a short film in the vein of old Michael Jackson videos with big-name directors like Martin Scorsese.
43. Björk, "Pagan Poetry" (2001)
Björk's personal brand of abstract sexuality is slathered all over this video. We're also big fans of "All Is Full of Love" and "It's Oh So Quiet," each one showcasing the ultimate in lovelorn, weird-girl hotness.
42. MSTRKRFT, "Easy Love" (2006)
MSTRKRFT's video for Easy Love is sure to color your next trip to Jamba Juice in erotic overtones. A clever half-ironic take on videos that employ the sexy buttoned-up-secretary cliché, the straw-between-the-lips closeup and the superfluous use of allegedly alluring fluids. And yet, we're still turned on.
41. Beastie Boys, "No Sleep Till Brooklyn" (1987)
They were never conventional sex symbols, but when we were in high school, the Beasties gave all the cocky, goofball, do-anything-for-a-laugh class clowns that we were attracted to a serious run for their money.
40. Poison, "Fallen Angel" (1988)
This is the story of a nice, small-town girl who gets sucked up and spat out by the Hollywood star system. Bret Michaels seems to rail against this in the song, but the video glorifies and exploits her anyway. Meta! In the end, she kicks the pervy producer in the balls, changes back into her original outfit and rides off into the sunset with Bret, destined to be dumped in time for the first season of Rock of Love.
39. Kylie Minogue, "Spinning Around" (2000)
More like writhing around (on the floor, the couch, the bar...) If you've ever wondered why the" Loco-Motion" chanteuse is a huge sex symbol everywhere but in the U.S., watch this.
38. Def Leppard, "Photograph" (1983)
Girls in cages, Marilyn Monroe impersonators, sexy black-and-white alleyway encounters... and maybe a bit too much Def Leppard, but whatever. Produced by Mutt Lange, former producer for AC/DC (street cred!) and future husband of Shania Twain (we take that back.)
37. David Bowie, "Boys Keep Swinging" (1979)
"When you're a boy, other boys check you out." That troublesome little line convinced RCA not to release Bowie’s '79 single in the U.S., and was censored by NBC when he performed the song on Saturday Night Live. But the video is well remembered for other, more important reasons. As one YouTube commenter put it, "[Bowie’s] the only guy I know that can look good in a dress."
36. Rick James, "Give It to Me Baby" (1991)
Let’s be honest: Rick James is terrifying. But once this video gets going, you'll see why we had to include it. This sort of shamelessness deserves recognition.
35. Heart, "All I Want to Do is Make Love to You" (1990)
She picks up a stranger, he shows her what a woman is capable of, she ditches him the next morning, thanking him for impregnating her. Rawr! The Wilson Sisters were sexier in their '70s hard-rock heyday, but this video went a long way toward offsetting the distinctly unsexy yuppie rock of their later years.
34. Duran Duran, "Hungry Like the Wolf" (1982)
The song responsible for launching Duran Duran in America comes complete with a pretty sweet video. This one does take a while to get going, however. If you're not a fan, you might want to skip to about 2:50 and the sex scene that gives a whole new meaning to the term "animalistic."
33. Madonna, "Like a Prayer" (1990)
One of the most controversial — and, according to MTV viewers, "most groundbreaking" — videos ever made, "Like a Prayer" depicts Madonna, patron saint of the inappropriate, getting it on with Saint Martin de Porres, the "black Jesus." The video sparked mass protests by Christian organizations, and prompted Pepsi to drop Madonna as a spokeswoman; she later publicly thanked the soda-pop company for giving the video so much publicity.
32. Rihanna, "Umbrella" (2007)
Even if you're as sick of hearing this song as we are, the video remains undeniably hot. Dancing en pointe is not something you see much of in music videos, and the mix of jazz-era stage work with MTV-era gyration is unexpectedly sexy.
31. Janet Jackson, "That's the Way Love Goes" (1993)
Janet's lead-off video for her sex-centered '93 album (a major smash) was a romantic, sweeping change in direction for the woman who brought the world the abstinence-promoting "Let’s Wait Awhile." No wonder Jackson comes off as so angelic and lovely here — the video was directed by her ex-husband, who clearly still has feelings for her.
30. Van Halen, "Hot for Teacher" (1984)
Geeky boy unwound by hot female authority figure? Check. High-school boredom alleviated by spontaneous mob mentality? Check. A classic, pure and simple, with a few surprisingly inventive scenes, like the long library-table strut, and the epilogue that tells us, in brilliant '80s-movie fashion, what everyone "went on" to do later.
29. She & Him, "Why Do You Let Me Stay Here?" (2008)
Why we're nerds: We find Zooey Deschanel's outfits — cowgirl, go-go-booted bride — way sexier than Britney Spears' Catholic schoolgirl.
28. Bruce Springsteen, "Dancing in the Dark" (1984)
Springsteen went from nerdy savior of rock-and-roll to full-blown megastar and hunky teen idol with this first video from 1984's Born In The USA. Of course, everyone remembers Courteney Cox's breakthrough performance as "extra #84,206" in this Brian De Palma-directed video, which manages to feel gargantuan and intimate at the same time.
27. Tom Waits, "The One That Got Away" (1976)
From 1976's Small Change album, video is also the only Academy Award winner on our list, thanks to its then-inventive use of rotoscoping, a process rarely seen again until the 2001 Richard Linklater film Waking Life. Tom Waits tangos with a stripper, smokes, improvises lyrics and mumbles, and is so caught up in himself that he loses her to a thug in a sleek new car, just after she takes off her top.
26. Shakira, "Hips Don't Lie" (2006)
Not since "Baby Got Back" has one particular part of the anatomy been so thoroughly, um, celebrated. This video makes us want to move to South America so we can be around people who dance like this, dress like this and party like this at all times.
25. Blondie, "Hangin' on the Telephone" (1978)
Our favorite Debbie Harry story was cruelly debunked, but Harry swore it happened at the time, so we'll relate it anyway: She was walking home through the Village one night after waitressing at Max's Kansas City. As usual, some guy offered her a ride. (The name Blondie came from guys cat-calling her from their cars.) She accepted, but got creeped out and vaulted out of the car at a red light. Later, she saw the man's mugshot on TV: it was Ted Bundy.
24. En Vogue, "Giving Him Something He Can Feel" (1992)
En Vogue took the style of Motown and updated it with this cover of a song originally written and produced by Curtis Mayfield for the 1976 film, Sparkle. Aretha Franklin provided the vocals for that movie (inspired by the Supremes), and En Vogue transforms her giddy, sunshiny rendition into something sultry and feline.
23. Fiona Apple, "Criminal" (1996)
From the Tidal album, Apple has said this track is about "feeling bad for getting something so easily by using your sexuality." We're not going to lie: the line between sexy and creepy gets a little blurry here. Maybe it's the way Apple — who The New Yorker once described as "an underfed Calvin Klein model" — glares into the searchlight with those heroin-chic eyes.
22. Prince, "The Greatest Romance Ever Sold" (1999)
Mr. Sexy MF has videos that are more erotic than this one (almost all of which have been removed from the internet), but "Greatest Romance" is the one diehard devotees clamor after the most, if the rabid fandom on the Prince.org message boards is to be believed.
21. D'Angelo, "How Does It Feel" (2000)
D'Angelo has been called a modern-day Prince (a claim Prince fans no doubt consider the highest form of treason), mainly because of his unabashed habit of fucking the camera with his eyes. In this, he fucks it with his whole, enormous body, but it's the totally unchecked, frothy orgasm he whips himself into near the end that gets him a spot on this list.
20. Cyndi Lauper, "She Bop" (1984)
The song about female masturbation that helped usher in the now-ubiquitous "Parental Advisory" sticker, "She Bop" and its accompanying video were a classic example of coding. The vibrating motorcycle, the "self-service" gas station, Sigmund Freud, and Cyndi dancing with sunglasses and a cane (geddit?) were genius. The only misfire — surely demanded by MTV execs — was subbing in the tamer Beefcake magazine for Blueboy, the gay-porn mag that’s actually mentioned in the lyrics.
19. Shakira , "La Tortura" (2005)
The most successful Spanish-language single ever recorded is accompanied here by a pretty hot (and surprisingly non-creepy) peeping-tom storyline. Don’t try it at home.
18. Iggy Pop, "Candy" (1990)
Was this the best duet of the '90s? It's hard to imagine anything so sexy, romantic and catchy earning a rung on the Top 40 anymore, particularly since you'd never be able to see the video anywhere. And the video is, in part, what made it such a heavily-requested tune: a shirtless Iggy and the mere presence of Kate Pierson. Since they only appear on screen together through trick photography, the sexual charge between them is even better than it would've been if they'd gotten all '80s duet-y and sung into each other's eyes.
17. TLC, "Red Light Special" (1995)
This song is actually about oral sex and menstruation, but don't let that distract you from how smokin’ TLC were in their heyday. Directed by Matthew Rolston, this video is set in a brothel, and Lisa "Left Eye" Lopes, always the hot tomboy of the group, plays the pimp with aplomb. Left Eye, who died in a car accident in 2002, was one of the first musicians to make safe-sex sexy — her condom eyeglasses were her trademark and, natch, a source of controversy.
16. Chris Isaak, "Baby Did A Bad Bad Thing" (1995)
In 1999, VH1, still marketing itself to the Boomer crowd, aired two versions of this video: a tamer one before nine p.m., and the one seen here after that. French supermodel Laetitia Casta donned a black wig to play the TV seductress, and Isaak’s '50s-greaser look blended perfectly with the roadside-motel milieu.
15. Aerosmith, "Sweet Emotion" (1975)
This may be the most verbally explicit video we ever saw on the old MTV. A phone sex hotline, in all its glory, with an unforgettable ending.
14. Marvin Gaye, "Sexual Healing" (1982)
This pre-MTV gem comes complete with opening credits and a storyline that holds up better than many from the high-budget videos of the '80s. Each time we see this, we think how tragic it was that we never got to see a video from Gaye's "distinguished gray" period.
13. a-ha, "Take On Me" (1985)
When we were kids, every girl in the neighborhood thought this video was incredibly hot. Reached via phone, each one of these girls pretended not to remember us. Regardless, millions of girls and boys bought this record in 1985, and almost every one of them did so because of this video, which remains one of the best-known in the MTV archives.
12. The Police, "Don't Stand So Close To Me" (1980)
Sting once said that this song is based on a true story from his earlier career as a teacher, alleging (quite plausibly) that his students sometimes developed crushes on him. It’s a great play on the dicey nature of student-teacher attraction; Sting’s wholesomeness keeps it from going too squirmy.
11. Joan Jett and the Blackhearts, "I Love Rock 'n Roll" (1981)
Originally shot in color, Joan somehow knew it would be all the nastier in grainy black-and-white. It’s still one of the thirty biggest songs ever, according to Billboard, the chart on which this spent seven weeks.
10. Britney Spears, "I'm a Slave 4 U" (2001)
Say what you will about Ms. Spears, this 2001 video is permanently filed away in the dirty minds of straight men the world over. Intended to shift Spears's image from girl-next-door to depraved, totally accessible sex symbol, it was an unarguable success on that front, if only for a while.
9. B-52s, "Love Shack" (1989)
If a better time was ever had in a music video, we don't know when it was. The unrestrained exuberance seen here is not something often found on MTV. Campy sexual energy made groovy by way of pure, delightful geeking out.
8. George Michael, "Freedom! '90" (1984)
Linda Evangelista, Cindy Crawford, Naomi Campbell, Tatjana Patitz and Christy Turlington are here to distract you from the fact that at no time does George Michael actually appear in this video (though a somewhat George Michael-ish looking double writhes in partial shadow). Michael's refusal to participate was part of a general rebellion at the time — he'd recently split from Wham!, and had had numerous conflicts with Sony Music over the production of his previous album, Listen Without Prejudice.
7. Chris Isaak, "Wicked Game" (1989)
If you don't remember this one, you're too young to be watching many of the videos on this list. Directed by Herb Ritts, it features a topless Isaak and a topless-but-never-totally-exposed Helena Christensen wrapped in each other's arms in teasing black-and-white. David Lynch directed an alternate, less-racy version comprised of scenes from his movie, Wild At Heart.
6. Billy Idol, "Cradle of Love" (1990)
During the time it aired, many guys considered this the sexiest video on MTV. Long imitated, never equaled, this utterly pointless story of a computer nerd who gets a visit from a hottie looking to show him some dance routines (huh?) features the sexiest split ever. Directed by David Fincher, who went on to glory with Seven, Fight Club, and Zodiac.
5. Aerosmith, "Cryin'" (1993)
A video so hot it made a movie star out of Alicia Silverstone. Some prefer the follow-up, "Crazy," with Alicia and Liv Tyler swimming in their underwear, but that always seemed like a rip-off of this one to us.
4. Madonna, "Justify My Love" (1990)
Banned by MTV and defended by Madonna on Nightline, "Justify My Love" eventually became the #1 video single of all time. And though we have no idea what a "video single" is, this clip probably best represents the '80s Madonna: all melodrama and angst, rubbing and writhing on the floor in a fit of uncontrollable lust. It all seems a little silly until you notice you're completely aroused.
3. Prince, "Little Red Corvette" (1983)
The split Prince does just before the two minute mark just might be the sexiest nanosecond in the history of the world. And we have it on good authority that Prince is pointing at you. Yes, you.
2. J. Geils Band, "Centerfold" (1980)
We're embarrassed to say this cheesy video was one of the reasons we turned on MTV late at night. Peter Wolf's homeroom girls are actually random dancers from a studio in the same building where the shoot took place, and no, MTV's original VJ Martha Quinn was not, as was long rumored, among them.
1. Robert Palmer, "Addicted To Love" (1985)
An argument for the ages: Is this Palmer's sexiest video, or does that honor belong to "Simply Irresistible"? After much debate, we settled on this one — a monument to '80s deadpan sexuality. The models, which appeared in three other Palmer videos, aren't even trying to look like they're playing the instruments. According to VH1's Pop-Up Video, a musician was hired to teach them basic guitar-fingering techniques, but gave up after an hour.
So what do you think, ONTD? What's missing?
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