Andy Bernard (![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small} troooooooooooy) wrote in ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/community.gif){kind=small} ohnotheydidnt,@ 2008-07-17 10:55:00 |
|
The Jonas Brother do not have a friend in the San Francisco Chronicle
Jonas Brothers concert bloated, unfocused
by Peter Hartlaub
The high-pitched screams could be heard three blocks away from the Shoreline Amphitheatre on Tuesday night.
They screamed as they walked through the security checkpoint on the way into the show. They screamed as they took the farthest seats on the lawn, squinting to see the stage. They screamed when a commercial came on the big-screen monitor, advertising something about malaria nets. By the time the Jonas Brothers reached the stage, prompting an uncharted decibel level from their mostly preteen fans, anything short of the Rapture was going to be an anticlimax.
The dreadlocked keyboard player did look a little bit like Jesus, but the Jonas Brothers' first of two Bay Area performances was a second coming by technicality only. Unlike the Miley Cyrus/Hannah Montana tour that passed through the Bay Area late last year - with the Jonas boys as the opening act - this much-hyped concert was unfocused, bloated and ultimately overwhelmed by its own excess.
The Jonas Brothers' young fans all seemed to be having a great time, but they weren't the greatest barometer of the group's musical talent and potential longevity as artists. Judging by the devoted looks in their eyes (and homemade pink sparkly-painted "What Would Jonas Do" T-shirts), the fans would have kept screaming if Nick, Joe and Kevin did nothing but sit on the stage reading a William Faulkner novel.
Instead, the band dutifully played the highlights from its new album, "A Little Bit Longer," and the Disney Channel movie "Camp Rock," which co-stars the show's opening act, Demi Lovato. The problem wasn't so much that most of the Jonas Brothers' tracks are almost instantly forgettable - what adult hasn't felt that way when listening to a boy band? The performance failed because it didn't even attempt to cobble the laser light show, eight-piece string ensemble and brotherly antics into a cohesive piece of entertainment
Before we get into detail, first a few observations that have nothing to do with the Jonas Brothers' actual performance:
-- There is one commodity whose prices are rising at a steeper rate than gasoline: the concert T-shirt. ($35 at the Jonas Brothers concert.) This isn't a major issue in the presidential race, but it should be.
-- It's OK if your 12-year-old daughter and her friends go to a Jonas Brothers concert in somewhat trampy attire. This has been going on since Elvis Presley started shaking his hips. But if you're the 43-year-old chaperone and you're also dressed like a hussy, you probably have a clinical problem. The Rock Medicine people really should set up a separate tent for that.
-- Just because Daddy didn't take you to the Jonas Brothers concert does not mean he doesn't love you. You see, a very important baseball game was on, and he probably had money on it, because that's the only way to watch the Major League Baseball All-Star festivities.
Now that those important points have been covered, a couple of nice things about the Jonas Brothers: While the concert wasn't good, there wasn't anything about the performers or their presentation that would upset parents. Nick (the cute one), Joe (the dreamy one) and Kevin (the Andrew Ridgeley) all keep their clothes on, love their parents and wear promise rings pledging their continued chastity. The most skin that was shown during the show was a video in which Nick raised his shirt a few inches to show the insulin pump for his diabetes. (It wasn't supposed to be sexy, but still received some of the loudest screams of the night.?
The Jonas Brothers also endeavor to be good musicians. Nick played guitar, keyboards and drums during the performance, and Kevin is a capable guitar player. If nothing else, the brothers might inspire a few kids to put down their Rock Band video game and take a real lesson.
On the downside, the Jonas Brothers are becoming so eclectic, they barely have a recognizable sound to call their own. Pretty much everything the brothers played Tuesday night was obviously derivative, starting with the show opener "That's Just the Way We Roll," which sounded like an Ugly Kid Joe song. The hit "Pushin' Me Away" heavily borrows the My Chemical Romance sound. Other performances aped the stylings of Elvis Costello and even the Blue Man Group. And although it's cool that Nick performed a 10-minute song about his struggle with diabetes, he really shouldn't have ripped off a Joni Mitchell lyric without crediting its writer. ("You don't know what you've got until it's goooooone.")
These transgressions would have been less of a problem if the concert's musical direction had some kind of rhyme or reason. When Hannah Montana put on white Nancy Sinatra boots and sung a few retro-sounding songs last year, it seemed more like a nice homage to the "Beach Blanket Bingo" era than outright theft. With Nick at one point wearing a tweed jacket with the sleeves rolled up, a white shirt with a loosened tie and a thick white Greg Brady belt, he seemed to be a walking collage of the 1950s, '70s and '80s all at once.
The stage show was equally random, with lighting that seemed inspired by a Lite-Brite and way more pyrotechnics than you'd expect from three boys who believe in hell. There was a giant steel "JB" symbol covered in flames that appeared above the boys near the end of the show that was pretty awesome. But didn't Judas Priest do something similar in the 1980s?
I think the whole thing is pretty LULTASTIC. I have been to a JB concert and I definitely see where the guy is coming from. The guy seems kind of butthurt though.
SOURCE
The high-pitched screams could be heard three blocks away from the Shoreline Amphitheatre on Tuesday night.
They screamed as they walked through the security checkpoint on the way into the show. They screamed as they took the farthest seats on the lawn, squinting to see the stage. They screamed when a commercial came on the big-screen monitor, advertising something about malaria nets. By the time the Jonas Brothers reached the stage, prompting an uncharted decibel level from their mostly preteen fans, anything short of the Rapture was going to be an anticlimax.
The dreadlocked keyboard player did look a little bit like Jesus, but the Jonas Brothers' first of two Bay Area performances was a second coming by technicality only. Unlike the Miley Cyrus/Hannah Montana tour that passed through the Bay Area late last year - with the Jonas boys as the opening act - this much-hyped concert was unfocused, bloated and ultimately overwhelmed by its own excess.
The Jonas Brothers' young fans all seemed to be having a great time, but they weren't the greatest barometer of the group's musical talent and potential longevity as artists. Judging by the devoted looks in their eyes (and homemade pink sparkly-painted "What Would Jonas Do" T-shirts), the fans would have kept screaming if Nick, Joe and Kevin did nothing but sit on the stage reading a William Faulkner novel.
Instead, the band dutifully played the highlights from its new album, "A Little Bit Longer," and the Disney Channel movie "Camp Rock," which co-stars the show's opening act, Demi Lovato. The problem wasn't so much that most of the Jonas Brothers' tracks are almost instantly forgettable - what adult hasn't felt that way when listening to a boy band? The performance failed because it didn't even attempt to cobble the laser light show, eight-piece string ensemble and brotherly antics into a cohesive piece of entertainment
Before we get into detail, first a few observations that have nothing to do with the Jonas Brothers' actual performance:
-- There is one commodity whose prices are rising at a steeper rate than gasoline: the concert T-shirt. ($35 at the Jonas Brothers concert.) This isn't a major issue in the presidential race, but it should be.
-- It's OK if your 12-year-old daughter and her friends go to a Jonas Brothers concert in somewhat trampy attire. This has been going on since Elvis Presley started shaking his hips. But if you're the 43-year-old chaperone and you're also dressed like a hussy, you probably have a clinical problem. The Rock Medicine people really should set up a separate tent for that.
-- Just because Daddy didn't take you to the Jonas Brothers concert does not mean he doesn't love you. You see, a very important baseball game was on, and he probably had money on it, because that's the only way to watch the Major League Baseball All-Star festivities.
Now that those important points have been covered, a couple of nice things about the Jonas Brothers: While the concert wasn't good, there wasn't anything about the performers or their presentation that would upset parents. Nick (the cute one), Joe (the dreamy one) and Kevin (the Andrew Ridgeley) all keep their clothes on, love their parents and wear promise rings pledging their continued chastity. The most skin that was shown during the show was a video in which Nick raised his shirt a few inches to show the insulin pump for his diabetes. (It wasn't supposed to be sexy, but still received some of the loudest screams of the night.?
The Jonas Brothers also endeavor to be good musicians. Nick played guitar, keyboards and drums during the performance, and Kevin is a capable guitar player. If nothing else, the brothers might inspire a few kids to put down their Rock Band video game and take a real lesson.
On the downside, the Jonas Brothers are becoming so eclectic, they barely have a recognizable sound to call their own. Pretty much everything the brothers played Tuesday night was obviously derivative, starting with the show opener "That's Just the Way We Roll," which sounded like an Ugly Kid Joe song. The hit "Pushin' Me Away" heavily borrows the My Chemical Romance sound. Other performances aped the stylings of Elvis Costello and even the Blue Man Group. And although it's cool that Nick performed a 10-minute song about his struggle with diabetes, he really shouldn't have ripped off a Joni Mitchell lyric without crediting its writer. ("You don't know what you've got until it's goooooone.")
These transgressions would have been less of a problem if the concert's musical direction had some kind of rhyme or reason. When Hannah Montana put on white Nancy Sinatra boots and sung a few retro-sounding songs last year, it seemed more like a nice homage to the "Beach Blanket Bingo" era than outright theft. With Nick at one point wearing a tweed jacket with the sleeves rolled up, a white shirt with a loosened tie and a thick white Greg Brady belt, he seemed to be a walking collage of the 1950s, '70s and '80s all at once.
The stage show was equally random, with lighting that seemed inspired by a Lite-Brite and way more pyrotechnics than you'd expect from three boys who believe in hell. There was a giant steel "JB" symbol covered in flames that appeared above the boys near the end of the show that was pretty awesome. But didn't Judas Priest do something similar in the 1980s?
I think the whole thing is pretty LULTASTIC. I have been to a JB concert and I definitely see where the guy is coming from. The guy seems kind of butthurt though.
SOURCE
