That's What She Said! - An Office Meta Community

4.14 - Goodbye, Toby

2008-05-21T15:54:39Z

Final meta of the season, you guys. I know, it's rough, but on the bright side, you know what we have this summer? That's right, we have WEBISODES. And that means that there ain't no party like a meta party, 'cause the meta party don't stop! So here's how summer meta with the webisodes is going to work:

I will do a post with the webisode video embedded as soon as I know it's up (aka - as soon as scranton_times tells me)
Since it's not a full episode I totally don't expect people to have whole posts dedicated to a little video, so I will NOT be going through your journals.
Instead, please comment on that post with all your thoughts, snark, and general awesomeness.
Anyone can do it. In fact, all the cool kids will be doing it, so you should too. Bring your friends! It'll be awesome.

Have any questions about how this works? Was I not v. clear? Either comment on this post or e-mail me your questions - my e-mail is chibirhm (AT) gmail (DOT) com. (I'm not very creative).

Anyways, finale! There was MUCH more meta to go through this week, so thank you to everyone for really stepping it up. You came alive, and I liked it.

Toby

Toby really is leaving? You know I didn't believe it when he said it and I kind of don't believe it now. A million people could tell me and I still wouldn't believe them. Kinda like when someone tells me that Pluto isn't a planet.
krilymcc

What were the circumstances of these two pictures of Toby being taken? He's in the kitchen pouring coffee. Was Michael trying to get a mug shot? Ba dum bum CHING!...oh, God.
swayinisdanicin

Jim
"And the first time we ever had sex was... on my desk." I mean, what?
sideviewhotel

dudski recently did a poll over weather Jim's second voicemail was assy or classy and I chose classy. I should clarify that statement - when I say it was classy, I mean it was pure, one hundred percent FDA approved, refined douchebaggery. It was douchbaggery of the highest degree, bred from a long line of show douchebags and hailed for it's douching abilities and superior douchebag genetics. And that, my friends, is classy. Also, awesome.
chibirhm

Pam
PAM. SO CLEARLY AWESOME. This is COMPLETELY TRUE. I would accept Pam to anything. Like, there's an application for my best friend/lesbian lover/life partner/wise guru who teaches me how to win at life that Pam could pick up, and I can promise she would totally get that too.
chibirhm

Pam's like, "He he, Toby's cute." TO RECAP: She's talking about this guy...

When she is fucking THIS GUY...

It was then that we decided that the only logical explanation was the easiest one. Toby slipped Pam a mickey.

It was very upsetting.
cah215

Wanna know the real reason Jim didn't propose to Pam? BECAUSE SHE'S WEARING EYE SHADOW THAT MATCHES HER SWEATER. The 70's called, it wants its makeup trends back.
swayinisdancin

So some other stuff happened with Pam this episode, like she didn't get engaged to that tall kid she's dating, which I guess if you run that through the English-to-Fandom translator on Babelfish will come out meaning that they inexplicably hate each other now and will break up and never have jambabies? (I will say that, though I fully understand the emotion and disappointment taking over, especially since he's been teasing her with this for like a month and there's no sign of it actually happening, I still think Pam would know enough to at least be able to guess that it was because of Andy. BUT STILL, JENNA FISCHER, WAY TO BREAK MY HEART WITH THAT FACE OF YOURS.)
dudski

Jim/Pam
WE'VE WAITED LIKE TEN YEARS FOR A JAM-JOING PRANK (computer thing in "Launch Party" doesn't count) SO THIS IS LIKE THEY'RE HAVING A BABY AND ITS NAME IS "PRANK HALPERT."
cah215

The JAM world is mostly in a hand-wringing kerfuffle over the lack of an engagement ring on Pam's finger this morning. (Seriously, the message boards at MTT look like a bulletin board at suicide camp).
laslohollyfeld

Random Tidbits
KELLY VISITING RYAN IN PRISON. Can someone please write a crossover sort of fic that's like Arrested Development where Kelly goes in with a red t-shirt that says "Slut" on it and the guards all shout "NO TOUCHING!" really loudly? Because I would pay big money to see that.
chibirhm

And also, way to contribute to the ongoing breaking of my heart - "It's my own fault." DWIIIIIIIIIGHT. You make it so easy for me to forget that you're referring to the time that you euthanized her cat, botched it, and left the poor thing to die in a freezer.
dudski

And maybe I'm being paranoid, but I could have SWORN that I heard a thud at the very end. DID PHYLLIS HAVE A HEART ATTACK? That's ridiculous, obviously...but...I SWEAR I HEARD IT.
missfnb

Meredith Palmer, have you joined the Dwight Army of Champions? Because I like it. Please drunkenly proposition Mose after a mission someday.
dudski

That's all, folks! See you later this summer!

4.13 - Job Fair

2008-05-16T00:08:46Z

So, um, apparently I can't keep track of days of the week? That's right, I'm a winner. Anyways, this week's meta was very sparse, but I have faith that the finale (!!!!) will inspire lots of meta. Like, from me too.

Pam
Pam talking about pretending to have PMS to avoid gym made me weirdly nostalgic. It also made me feel kind of bad for Pam, because it means she never learned to take the least active of all gym classes. For example, I took archery. A lot.
cashewdani

Is it a requirement now that Pam must wear her hair in a ponytail in the second-to-last episode of the season? Does this give her the energy and courage needed to do something audacious during the episode? Like walk across coals and make out with her boyfriend in the office? Whatever works, girl.
swayinisdancin

Pam's managing to make her job sound cool without throwing up in her mouth. She deserves a fucking trophy right now.
cah215

Big things are gonna happen with Miss Beesly. Either New York or Philly? Can you take Jim with you, please? I know he's a little big to cram into a carry on, but you can't be separated! You're Jam! It's like when you buy the rasberry jam with the seeds because it's less expensive so then you gotta deal with the seeds, unless you wanna put it through a sieve to separate the jam from the seeds and... what was my point? I think... NY and Philly were supposed to be seeds... or something. Anyways, Jam!
nutmeg610

Jim
HOW JIM HALPERT GOT HIS GROOVE BACK.
dudski

I liked the idea that probation equals having to play golf. I kind of imagine purgatory is kind of the same scenario.
cashewdani

HEY, UH, JIM, CAN I TALK TO YOU ABOUT SOMETHING? I WAS JUST, UM...I'M IN LOVE WITH YOU.
dudski

Speaking of Fancy New Halpert, he blocked a guy's car for 15 minutes and bent the client to his will! If Dwight has a blog, Jim's been reading it.
cashewdani

Final Thoughts
I will never get tired of watching Andy fall into something. Lake, sand trap, a well; I'm not picky.
swayinisdancin

4.12 - Did I Stutter?

2008-05-07T21:53:12Z

Holy crap is it? Could it be? Yes, I think it is JULIA POSTING THE META ON A WEDNESDAY. HOLY CRAP, YOU GUYS.

While you're all celebrating how awesome I am, let's take a moment out to congratulate Angela on her new daughter Isabel! Huzzah, babies!

And a final reminder - if you are friends-only, please, please, please add scranton_reader to your friends-list. It's just me, and I am only reading your Office posts. It will never update or clog up your friends list. It just lets me read what you write so I can add it to the meta without you having to read about my boring-assed life. Kapeesh? Good.

Ryan, Jim, and Toby
Ryan was once again super hot with his beard! He pulled up in the BMW convertible (why does he have that if he lives in Manhattan) with no tie and his shirt all unbuttoned and I was a little tingly about it. And then he kind of dominated Jim with his power and was kind of all snarky and enjoying it, and at that point I drifted off into thinking about them making out, so I don't really know how that was resolved, if at all.
cashewdani

According to Ryan, Jim's lackluster approach to his job is the reason DM is circling the drain. Really, Ryan? How's that website working out for you? How 'bout this for a theory: Ryan has introduced a website that is showing customers that not only are salesmen unnecessary, but also paper. Smooth move there, Einstein. Have some more cocaine.
laslohollyfeld

I really enjoyed the way Ryan gave Jim his formal warning. Ryan's is the greatest character development since Pam Beesly turned over her fancy new leaf. I LOVE IT SO MUCH. And Toby! He and Ryan are going to start the We ♥ Pam Club and IT'S GONNA BE AWESOME. Stay sharp, Halpert.
irishmizzy

Was I the only one who laughed when Jim said that he supported the Eagles franchise by a wing and a prayer? AHAHAHA. WINGS.

I am such a laugh slut for Jim. It's ridiculous.
chibirhm

Ryan's complaints about pranks made me realize that we haven't seen pranks in awhile. Since the computer vs. Dwight I think. Pranks, come back please, even if you end up getting Jim fired like a heart attack.
cashewdani

Question: when did this show get renamed Everybody Hates Jim?
rainbowstevie

Darryl
I have a very unnatural dislike of Darryl, because he plays with Michael in such a mean-spirited way. I've always been turned off by Darryl purely for this reason. He's like that kid on the playground that tells you that you can only be cool if you eat some worms, and then right after you do, he laughs and tells you how gross you are in front of the entire class and that he can't be friends with someone who would do that. You know those kids, right? That's Darryl.
firthgal

Fluffy fingers! Although after Darryl told Michael about it kell887 thought would be funny to tickle me and I told her to stop, but she didn't. So I had to kick her. So see Darryl, fluffy fingers doesn't always lead to church and ice cream. Sometimes it leads to little blonde girls getting kicked in the face.
krilymcc

DARRYL WAS A NEWSIE. Fact: "make out with a Newsie" is #10 on my bucket list (so many different buckets I want to own. Buckets!). Call me, Darryl! Because I'm sure he has Christian Bale's number around somewhere. Or the guy who played David. Or Spot, whoevs -- I'm not picky.
irishmizzy

Pam
Pam wore her "backup glasses," apparently bought at Elton John's garage sale, and yet managed to remain as adorkable as ever.
laslohollyfeld

You guys, when Pam translated what Kelly was saying? SO DELIGHTFUL. I sometimes like to think that that's exactly what happens in the writer's room, when Mindy's all chatty about how one time she was in college and she met this really cute boy, Gene will just go "TRANSLATION" and everyone looks at BJ and he gives this long-suffering sigh and he's like, "She thinks we should have a subplot about Pam wearing her backup glasses." Or maybe Jen translates because she's the other girl, I don't know. EITHER WAY, I WANT TO HANG OUT IN THAT ROOM.
irishmizzy

Pam and I have the same middle name, and for that I am DELIGHTED.
mozarts_friend

Dwight
Oh, once the X-Terra got brought into the picture I couldn't stop laughing. If it was a yellow X-Terra, it would have been worse. I was 99% sure that at some point in the episode Logan Echolls would pop up, but he didn't. Instead, apparently, I learned that only girls drive X-Terras, which explains so much about Logan, really.
chibirhm

Dwight is a very good sales person. I wanted to sell my car to him and I don't even own a car.
krilymcc

Dwight has a lot to learn about persuasion. I think this method is probably what he came up with when he realized that Jedi mind tricks didn't actually work. Perhaps he should check out the Wikipedia page. I bet he could get some good tips.
chibirhm

Mad Libs
Watching Andy and Angela do mad libs was like watching geriatrics talking about the good old days before the radio.
nutmeg610

If someone made me a pad full of Dwight-libs, I would love them forever. Or if someone could somehow deliver Dwight to me, I feel the mad libs we created would be awesome. And probably purely carnal. And that is all you need to know.
chibirhm

Quick announcement!

2008-05-02T02:16:12Z

In a fit of absolute genius (also, while I was annoyed that I couldn't read friends-only meta), I realized that some people just might not want to friend me. AHAHA. Wow. I'm smart.

So, in lieu of friending me, everyone who has friends-only entries should add scranton_reader. It will never update, and I will only use it to read your meta. Ta da! Problem solved.

Carry on with your regularly scheduled fanpoodling.

4.11 - Night Out

2008-05-01T23:15:07Z

Sorry the meta's so late this week, you guys, it's reaaaaaaally sparse so I kept holding off and hoping someone would write something. Like, um, me. And then I didn't.

Anyways, sorry there's so little, new Office tonight, and this time, I'm totally going to write some meta and you will too. in the meantime, have some meta (some of which I stole from people's comments. That's right, I'm not above reading the comments.)

Miscellaneous Characters
I loved this [Pam throwing the football], mainly because I can see myself totally doing the exact same thing with a football... Actually any kind of ball throwing really. But instead of hitting Meredith in the head I'd end up hitting myself. That may have actually happened once. Though possibly I was kicking the ball instead of throwing... it's all a bit of a blur. Anyway, thank you Pam! Not only for allowing me to relive my traumatic sport experiences but for standing proud for uncoordinated, sports inept nerds everywhere.
thursday_n

Jim is really cute in the scene with him and Ryan in the kitchen. Apparently there was dialogue and plot development, but I was smiling goofily and swooning, so I couldn't really say.
dawn_xx

Dwight

Watching the opener, my dad looked over at me and said "Do you actually need that much peanut butter to get gum out?" and is my dad Dwight Schrute? Because who really thinks you need to cover every last hair with nut goop to get out a small spot of sticky gum?
Actually, I wish my dad was Dwight Schrute. That would be awesome.
dawn_xx

I also love that Dwight is the one that gets all the ladies, and Angela got to see his escapades. Sorry, I'm evil, but she needs to realize what a sexy beast she lost (although, right now, she's with an even sexier beast, and she ain't giving him any loving. What is wrong with that woman?).
firthgal

Toby
Well, that was horrifically uncomfortable. Let me put it this way: I need a new skin, because I just crawled out of mine.
rainbowstevie

I loved the awkwardness of Toby, which, I might add, is really nice to be vindicated on something I've said all along: that his crush on Pam was NOT, in fact, cute, but über creepy. I know everyone is usually all "awwww, poor Toby," but trust me... the universe is happiest when it is destroying him. And so am I.
laslohollyfeld

I know it was probably the most embarrassing moment of his [Toby's] entire life, but I don't know - it was so legendary I feel like there should've been a slow clap or something.
dudski

Ryan
Ryan! Is a cokehead! I knew it! No one purposely goes for the Miami Vice look anymore. It kind of makes me sad that the "Will I be too warm in a long-sleeved tee" Ryan is now a failing corporate hack who's questioning human survival during the apocalypse while his eyes are having a staring contest with each other. Still, I'd do him in a New York minute.
themightybee

But you know that Nuclear Holocaust comment? That's totally something I would wonder about when I'm sober. What does that say about me?
krilymcc

Closing Thoughts
dudski: Mindy Kaling, why can't we be best friends?
irishmizzy: What I'm saying is, Mindy Kaling, will you wait for me while I tie my shoe?

4.10 - Chair Model

2008-04-24T18:09:35Z

So I literally just forgot meta this week. Like, to do or post. GOOD JOB, ME. CLEARLY I AM AN EXCELLENT MOD.

To make up for it though - y'all really stepped up to the bat. And for that, I salute you. Here are some medals made out of yogurt lids.

Michael
Michael. Gary. Scott. Why do you pull me in six different directions every week? Why do I love you, and pity you, and want to smack you across the face? [Verbatim from my notes: DO NOT BE A DOUCHEWAD EW I HATE YOU BUT PLEASE FIND LOVE AND BE HAPPY]
dudski

Also, Michael is an ass. An superficial ass. But I don't hate him. It's like hating a child who did something that caused a bad thing to happen without really knowing it was wrong. Oh, Michael.
lunapluvia

You know, when Michael started grilling Phyllis about her friend Sandy, I was freaking out. "Come on, Michael, I'm sure Phyllis has a friend who can fit your...standards." Then he pulled out the rowboat question. And Phyllis didn't answer straightaway. And my heart died a little. Can't a plump person like Phyllis ever have thin friends or is that against the Laws of TV or something?
chakaevr05

Who has two thumbs and ships Michael/Pam's Mom now? THIS GAL!
teffy

This whole dating thing was extremely awkward and hysterical. Especially Michael's drink order of a hot chocolate with caramel and peppermint as there's no way that even sounds appetizing or like it will mix well. Much like Michael and his date. Zing! And also, I though Pam's landlord was a pretty attractive woman. I kind of felt super bad for her. And like I might be her in the future. Except I wouldn't own an apartment complex. I'll be lucky if I can even rent an apartment in the future.
cashewdani

Can I just say that as soon as Michael started singing "American Pie", my brain instantly thought of the "Star Wars" version that Weird Al Yankovic did? Seriously. I was trying to sing along, but my brain kept giving me the lyrics to that version and it was driving me crazy. Imagining Michael as Anakin Skywalker is not good for my mental health.
chakaevr05

Kevin!
Kevin got depth. Kevin! He actually made me tear up a little bit. KEVIN!
firthgal

I kinda expected more with the whole 'five families' thing. I thought it was gonna be like the Justice League of Scranton. I was sadly disappointed. Well, Michael is kinda like Wonder Woman.
teffy

Jim and Pam (aka - over 75% of this post)
I CANNOT ACCURATELY EXPRESS MY HYSTERICAL SHRIEKING GLEE RIGHT NOW, EXCEPT POSSIBLY WITH A CAPSLOCKY KEYBOARD SMASH OF JOY. ERGO: ASKLDFJASDFKL;ASDJFKL;JASKL;DFJKL;ASFJASDFASDF!!!
rainbowstevie

HALPERT. HALPERT!!!!!!!!!!!!1 ADORABLE SHENANIGANS! Thank you for not proposing on a street corner. THANK YOU FOR BUYING A RING ONE WEEK AFTER YOU STARTED DATING.

I TAKE BACK EVERY BAD THING I EVER SAID ABOUT YOU. UMMM, EARLIER TODAY.
hellopoe

Remember when I was kind of over Jim Halpert because he dumped Karen when she was crying by a fountain, and he can sometimes be a dick and all that jazz? Well, yeah, I am weak and once again totally in love with him. Sorry heart, prepare to be shattered.
cashewdani

This is what I don't understand about my love for Jim, I know a guy who proposed six months after he and this girl started dating and I was like, "Woah buddy isn't it kinda soon?" but Jim buys Pam an engagement ring ONE WEEK AFTER THEY STARTED DATING and I'm like, "Jim Halpert you are superman. Do me now." I don't get it.
krilymcc

The sight of Jim on one knee is enough to have me screaming like a little girl who's had too many Pixie Stix.
chakaevr05

I'll be the one to say it, because someone has to: BUYING AN ENGAGEMENT RING AFTER ONE WEEK IS CREEPY. NOT ROMANTIC. CREEPY. And fake proposing? IS AN ASSY THING TO DO. It's like the Boy Who Cried Wolf but with diamonds.
irishmizzy

I'll agree that Pam doesn't want to be engaged the way she was engaged to Roy. But really, like Jim is going to wait three years before he's set a date. I'm pretty sure he has the church booked and Chili's reserved for the reception.
swayinisdancin

I feel like they have set up this tragic trajectory for how it's going to play out - Jim proposes, Pam freaks out, Jim's sweet adorable precious darling little heart breaks, TENSION REIGNS SUPREME, etc. Off again, on again, off again, on again - television comedy's favorite cliche.

I'd say, Greg Daniels, that you shouldn't do this to Jim and Pam. But the reality is, don't do this to me. For I am Michael Scott, wanting only what I cannot have. Michael wants a dead chair model, I want boys who are gay, famous, and fictional. Michael and I both need to know that sometimes you CAN have the love of your life be someone who is not completely unattainable. JIM AND PAM TELL ME LOVE IS REAL. DON'T TAKE THAT AWAY FROM ME.
melodywenn

I couldn't even live in my squee-induced bubble for one day before I got to my first class on Friday and had to put up with a bunch of girls talking about how Office has just been all downhill since season 2, and how Jim/Pam are clearly about to break up soon. IT'S JIM/PAM. They do not follow the rules of normal TV relationships any more than Joe/Alison or Charlie/Amita do (Charmita, that was not a jinx, so don't even think about it).

And why does nobody care that Turk and Carla managed to meet, date, and get married without immediately causing Scrubs to explode in flames? In a related note, Chandler and Monica did not destroy the infrastructure of Friends. And How I Met Your Mother is currently thriving with Mr. & Mrs. Erickson, and they only dealt with one year of angst.

Yes, it vaguely worries me that they've gone along without any particular conflicts so far, but can't we all agree not to care? I know at the time "Casino Night" must have seemed like a godsend and then "Gay Witch Hunt" was the cruelest knife twist ever, but I refuse to believe that's happening again. And why would you even want to entertain the thought? Shut up and squee, dammit!
rainbowstevie

Meanwhile, is there somewhere I can go to take classes in becoming Pam Beesly? Because she is my hero and I like to think I do a decent job of being awesome, but clearly I am nowhere near that level of awesome and it's a goal I'd like to achieve one day.
surrexi

Closing Thoughts
BJ NOVAK FTW. You are my new hero. Seriously. I don’t care that I was cursing you and your evil little goatee since the season started, you are AWESOME.
chakaevr05

In conclusion: FUCK YOU NBC. I COULD HAVE BEEN WATCHING THIS FOR THE PAST FIVE MONTHS INSTEAD OF CRYING MYSELF TO SLEEP ON THURSDAYS WITH NO OFFICE TO COMFORT ME. MAJOR FAIL.
teffy

4.09 - Dinner Party

2008-04-16T23:42:55Z

Oh, meta. It's good to see you. And to hear from new people! Basically, this week was awesome. Keep on rocking, y'all.

OMG THE SHOW IS BACK!!!!!
Oh, show. I have missed you so much. Nearly 6 months is too long to wait for a new episode. I remember back when the strike started and Jenna said in her blog that the episode they were about to film was The Dinner Party, and it was the funniest one she'd ever read. I was so disappointed because I thought we might not ever get to see it. Greg Daniels, bless you. Now, we have.
teffy

I would be embarrassed by the amount of excited screaming I did in the minutes prior to the start of the episode if it weren't for the fact that new Office is a TOTALLY VALID REASON for that much excitement, even if I did eventually shut myself up so that nobody would think I was being murdered.
dudski

Jim
Not to point the complete obvious, but John looks good. He always looks good, but SIX MONTHS! And now he's Jim again and it looks so good.
lunapluvia

Oh my god, is it good to see my old boyfriend Jim Halpert back. I forgot what JKras' face does to me. Literally, every little expression makes my stomach just turn into a ball of liquid joy. I. I can't even explain it. The show could consist of a half an hour of JKras laughing and making faces and talking about, like, anything at all. Income taxes, I don't care. I would religiously tune in anyways and sigh and giggle over him discussing deductibles. Like, for real.
chibirhm

Jim's faces in this episode were, in my opinion, the most entertaining Jim-faces this season. Then again, I'm sure my own face would contort hideously if I was placed in a room full of candles. No offense, Bath and Body Works.
chakaevr05

Jim/Pam
Sometimes, I read fic where Jim and Pam are all "HOMG, SEXXX!" and I think to myself; that is not right. And I am glad they balked at the camera in the bedroom. It made me happy inside that they are... them.
lunapluvia

JIM, YOU ASS! You don't leave your girlfriend in the pit of awkwardness that was that party. It's not done. She totally could withhold sex from you for at least a week and no one would judge her negatively about that decision.
cashewdani

Was Jim seriously going to abandon Pam? I think he was, you guys. And I think that if this was season 1 or season 2 Pam, she would have let him. But this is our awesome season 3 and season 4 Pam. She won't take that shit. She'll hook Jim in to suffer with her.
teffy

It was a lot like watching watching Jim and Pam go through their very own version of the Saw movies. THINK ABOUT IT. They get tricked into entering this situation that just gets increasingly more awkward and painful as the night goes on, and they're completely subject to whatever bizarre little game Michael and Jan are playing with each other. Jim attempts to throw Pam to the wolves and run for it, BUT HE CANNOT ESCAPE.
dudski

Michael and Jan (BABE)
Oh. My. God. Michael has hand chairs! Are we sure that he isn't secretly a Bluth? I mean think about it: He likes magic, he has hand chairs, he has bad relationships. He'd fit right in.
krilymcc

I have a feeling that even if they didn't have a dinner party, this is exactly what Michael and Jan would be doing on a typical evening at home.
teffy

I am so glad that they carried out the whole idea that Jan thinks Pam is trying to steal Michael from Fun Run. And I have to give mad props to Melora, because she just did the tiniest glance at Pam and I knew they were going to take that and run with it.

Of course, that might say more about my level of obsessive fanishness than anything else. Perhaps I should not be saying these things out loud.
chibirhm

Dwight

fuskeez

Dwight brought his babysitter, who I really wanted to tell someone that she doubted their commitment to Sparklemotion. I guess it was good enough that Dwight said their relationship was purely carnal. It was hysterical and made me want to vomit simultaneously.
cashewdani

fuskeez

Andy/Angela

Andy taking off his jacket to reveal a sweater already tied jauntily around his shoulders? Awesome. I bet he was as good a mannequin stylist as he was a folder at Abercrombie & Fitch.
themightybee

Angela slamming the ice cream on Andy's car because he tried to kiss her was THE BEST THING I THINK ANGELA HAS EVER DONE.

IN RECENT MEMORY, ANYWAYS. IT'S BEEN A WHILE SINCE POOP RAINED FROM THE CEILING.
chibirhm

Ice cream cone? $3.
Shiny car? $150,000.
Angela dumping ice cream on the side of Andy's shiny car? Priceless.
chakaevr05

See you next week!

WELCOME BACK EVERYONE

2008-04-10T21:35:21Z

God, it's been a while, but guess who's back? Back again?

That's right we're back, back again, ready to bring you all the meta you've been missing this break. So all those snarky comments, all those delicious insights, all those poorly-maniped MS Paint Graphics you've been itching to make? GET READY TO MAKE THEM, KIDS, BECAUSE THE OFFICE RETURNS TONIGHT.

I feel God in this Chilli's tonight.

4.08 - The Deposition

2007-11-22T03:06:24Z

Well, this is the last meta for what hopefully won't be too long. The WGA is doing talks starting the 26^th guys. Keep the hope alive.

In the meantime, I hope all of our American members have a happy Thanksgiving and everyone has a safe and wonderful holiday season.

First...OMG THIS CANNOT BE THE LAST EPISODE OF THE SEASON I SWEAR I WILL KILL MYSELF...LIKE IN ROMEO & JULIET...THE CLAIRE DANES VERSION. IT HURTS MY HEART. IT HURTS MY STOMACH. IT HURTS MY ARMS. I FEEL LIKE I'VE BEEN PUNCHED IN THE GRIEF BONE AND I AM VERY...very...alone.
themightybee

Michael
This was one of the most heartachey episodes since the time Dwight cried in the stairwell? I kept clutching at my chestal region and whispering "Oh, Michael," at my tv. Sigh. Oh, Michael has become the new Oh, Matt Saracen in my vocabulary this fall.
irishmizzy

Really, I just want to give Michael a hug. I want to gather him in my arms and cuddle him like a baby koala.
themightybee

I really hope that a lot of Michael's diary was filled with imaginary stories about the things he and Ryan do together. Even though I guess it's kind of sad to lie in your own diary. Whatever. In my mind, there's an entry that talks about when he and Ryan went waterskiing together. And how they wore matching life vests and each made it around the lake twice.
cashewdani

I guarantee you that Michael has a whole page in his diary dedicated to drawing little hearts around Ryan's name. And he probably uses a pink fuzzy pen. Or a glitter pen. Or both.
firthgal

I've never been anything less than indifferent towards Jan, but I really kind of hated her last night. I don't doubt that she loves Michael, but she's still so blinded by her bitterness that she was willing to put him on the line in order to win her battle. I wanted for Andy to pop up out of nowhere and punch a hole in her face.
themightybee

Toby
Hey, remember that one time when Toby was pouring his very soul to Michael, and Michael was listening with an expression of reflective solemnity, and then he pushed Toby's tray off the table??? Ahhh. Those were good times.
dollsome

The history of Toby's broken home did nothing to help the happiness levels of this episode. It was very mean, the way they were all, "Here, let's melt your heart a smidge by having Michael sit with Toby at lunch. HA HA SUCKER, have a story about baby Toby stuck in Divorce Court. We dare you not to cry."
irishmizzy

Toby's gleeful giggling. That moment was filled with more joy than Julie Andrews reading fairytales to a basket full of puppies.
dollsome

Pam
PAMELA BEESLY, WHY ARE YOU NOT SITTING IN MY LIVING ROOM, BEING MY BFF? I have tortilla chips and two bottles of three-buck Chuck. How could you possibly say no to that?
irishmizzy

I thought Pam's reaction was interesting. She used to date Roy, this manly-man type of guy. Is she feeling slightly insecure now that she's dating Jim, the emasculated, flippy-haired girl-child? It's okay, Pam. Kelly is still not more of a woman than you are. She's just dating more of a man than you are. And you know what? I'd pick the emasculated, flippy-haired girl-child, too.
melodywenn

Kelly
The smack vs. trash discussion from Kelly is very true, and honestly were his parents first cousins who were also bad at ping pong? is perhaps the best put down ever. I will vary it appropriately to work in all social situations.
cashewdani

I want to be Mindy Kaling when I grow up. No, really, I do. I have no higher aspirations in life than to be even remotely as awesome as Mindy Kaling and/or Kelly Kapoor. Now that, my friends, is ambition.
chibirhm

Dwight (and Mose)
All of Dwight's heroes are table tennis players. Huh. I was unaware Hiro from Heroes played ping pong. Or Bono.
irishmizzy

Dwight is pure awesomeness, plain and simple. And is it just me, or has Dwight gotten sexier this season? I must admit, in the past I've never thought of Dwight as sexy, just dorky cute, but for some reason this whole lovesick Dwight is incredibly irresistible, and then Dwight just struts in and beats the ping pong crap out of that floppy-haired girl that Pam is dating. He was just... oh, he was wonderful. I was drooling over Dwight guys, it's true. Especially when he was scoring points off of Jim while looking at his cell phone. And then the way he whispered the dumbass comment? Yeah, I was a goner. Consider me a puddle of goo.
firthgal

Every time Michael Schur comes on screen I jump up and down, scream, and pee my pants. Is that too much information? Because it's kind of totally true.
chibirhm

In other news, The Who should reunite (again) and write a musical on those ping pong wizards, Dwight and Mose.
themightybee

If this had to be our last episode, then at least it went out with a bang. DWIGHT VS. MOSE, HELLS YES. I will cling to that image of glory in every cold and lonely Thursday night that is to follow.
dollsome

4.07 - Survivor Man

2007-11-14T22:51:48Z

Hey kids! This is just a quick reminder that if you want me to quote you in the meta, two things need to happen. One: "office meta" (no quotes) needs to be in your userinfo, and two, I need to have clearance to read your entries. Which, if you're friends-only, means you need to friend me, post your meta publicly, or comment on a previous post with your thoughts. I will get them. And they will be appreciated and potentially quoted and everyone will stop and wonder at your awesome. True facts.

I remind you all of this because the number of meta-ers has been dwindling over the past couple of weeks. I am totally and completely sympathetic to if you're busy, but I want to make sure that if you're not (or are and eschew your other responsibilities for meta, which I fully support) that I can read and use what you've said. It's how this community works after all. So please, let me read about you and The Office and how hilarious you are. And invite your friends to join in the party so I don't have to go try and recruit people. I hate recruiting. It's sort of lame if it's just a bulletin being like "HEY! WE'RE AWESOME. PLEASE LOOK AT HOW AWESOME WE ARE". It holds more weight if you do it by going up to your Office friends and being like "Hey, I notice you're pretty awesome. What's funny is that I'm also awesome and I've joined this awesome community..." and let it go from there.

And I know all of this is true because I looked it up on Wikipedia.

Toby
Toby going camping with Ryan et al? Awesome. Michael not getting invited? Fine. Everyone talking about it in front of him? NOT ON. Guys, you're supposed to get awkwardly quiet when he enters the room and then make small talk about the coffee or something. Did no one in Scranton go to middle school? Because that's where I developed all my shh-he's-coming skills.
irishmizzy

Also, last season, Toby's whole kicked puppy routine was really endearing, and you felt like his love for Pam was quiet and true and sad and lovely, and this season I want to kick him because he won't stop peeing on the carpet.

...Is that taking the kicked puppy thing too far? What I mean to say is, he's being a little bitch (tm Michael Scott). Stop it, Toby. Just wear your beret and pine from afar, mkay?
sundancekid

Toby is really starting to piss me off. I don't mind him being a little emo and Basset-Hound-esque, because it's adorable, but seriously, he needs to either grow a pair and do something or stop sad sacking around the office trailing gloom and misery everywhere. Seriously, even JIM HALPERT has displayed more cajones than Toby has. When Jim Halpert appears to be more of a man in comparison to someone else, you know that person has issues. That's all I'm saying.
chibirhm

Jim (And Birthday Parties)
I was a little surprised that Jim wanted to have only 1 birthday party. I thought that he would be completely on board for anything that wastes time and takes him away from selling paper. But, maybe Karen messed with his head last week. Or maybe they needed a point for Michael and Jim to relate on. Either way. But more importantly, putting aside the issue of wasting time at work being awesome (That's right Kevin, I too just sit around and wait for the break. We call that 3:30-5) how can Jim take away the cake? Cake is always good. I don't care what situation you're in, cake can improve it. Jim Gaffigan only talks about important, social issues with gobs of truth behind them in his stand up, and that's why cake being awesome is in there. Look it up, totally true.
cashewdani

Jim, nobody likes your one-big-birthday idea because you are depriving them of 13 individual cakes. I mean, seriously. There are only so many things you can look forward to at work - the list is like: birthdays, 5 pm, national holidays, and Pretzel Day. Why are you trying to rob them of cake, Jim? Why don't you just take New Year's away from Stanley while you're at it?
irishmizzy

I loved watching Jim get slowly more annoyed and frustrated as his simple idea spiraled (spiralled?) out of control. Being a leader is def hard. I wouldn't want to do it. His horror at realizing he said conference room, and then Phyllis calling him Michael. I think we may have just seen Jim slide back into his swamp of non-ambition. I summer there. And also winter. Pretty much every season is spent there actually, now that I'm thinking about it.
cashewdani

Meredith and I share a love for Devil's Food cake. I'm sure there's a pun in there somewhere about Meredith and "devil" and what-not but ... sigh... too lazy. Just want chocolate now.
greenfish

The birthday montage was the moment in the episode where I had to pause and crack up on my own, rewind, watch it again, crack up simultaneously, rewind, watch it again, pause, crack up, rewind, watch it again, crack up and keep going. I missed the next ten or twenty seconds.
falulatonks

Best unsung moment of the week: Andy's grumpy face when Michael does the high harmony during Happy Birthday. Because clearly, the one thing that stops him from being a kiss-ass is when the person he's sucking up to desecrates a cappella. See, he does have priorities in life.
chibirhm

Jim, I don't care if you're still at Dunder Mifflin in ten years, you will still be amazingly sexy.

Am I talking really loud? I feel like I'm talking really loud.
swayinisdancin

Pam
It kind of totally cracks me up how seemingly turned on Pam gets by Jim getting ideas. Like, she literally sashays up to him just for the purpose of being like "So... I hear you have an idea. I have an idea too. It involves pants, ie, me not wearing them" and that, boys and girls, is the real reason Jim tries and take initiative. It's Pavlovian, in a way.
chibirhm

Pam somehow keeps getting prettier with every episode. Eventually, she's going to realize she's too pretty for Jim and will start having sex with herself.
greenfish

Odds and Ends
I wish to marry the way that Oscar looked at the camera after Jim walked away. Our babies will have my wit and beauty and its exquisite disdain. With inherent qualities like that, they'll have conquered the world by first grade!
dollsome

4.06 - Branch Wars

2007-11-08T23:01:04Z

Yikes! I apologize a million trillion times for making you guys wait for the meta, I had a big-assed paper due today and then once I handed it in I was so busy being relieved that I forgot to post this.

I'd like to take a quick moment before I post to discuss the writer's strike. You guys, we're really lucky to have this show to watch and adore and write about, but every tiny thing that we love in it just wouldn't exist without the amazing writers. They're kind of awesome. I know a bunch of you agree with me (hello, last week we had a section discussing our writer love), and if you don't, no harm, no foul. But if you do, I strongly urge you to support these amazing people who give us a reason to love Thursday nights so much. So, if you want to a) watch our writers be awesome, b) see Michael Schur not as Mose (and sort of adorable beardless! Like a little baby) or c) want to hear why we should support our writers, I suggest checking out this youtube video of them picketing. If you would like to take action, there is the main Fans for Writer's website where any and all fans can make their voices heard, and a more specific Office Fans for Office Writers site as well. Finally, I'd suggest joining wga_supporters here on LJ. Even if you don't participate, joining is a good way to show you care.

Anyways, meta! Sorry it's late. Just pretend I was on strike or something. HAR HAR.

Michael
How much do I love Michael having a dummy of himself at Halloween every year? At least he knows he'll always be the smartest person in the room. You know, as long as it's just the two of them.
paper_jam11

Michael's reputation must have spread all over the country from paper company to paper company of the man who hit his employee with his car. I think I recently heard someone mention the event in a Staples, but that may have been my imagination.
dreamingwriter

When Michael said, to the Utica salesman, "I'm a genie in a bottle," I fully expected the next line to be "I'll rub you the right way." Because I am nothing if not a product of my generation. In fact, I'm a slave 4 U, wherever, whenever. I want it that way, but it's tearin' up my heart. So bye, bye, bye. That's right. I just typed that.
irishmizzy

Most of the time I'll be with Ryan. Or Darryl. What are the odds of that happening, Michael? I love that Michael's imaginary world may be more ridiculous than my own, and well, let's just say in mine Hal Sparks and Michael Ian Black are making out with one another to improve VH1 in the only way it can be.
cashewdani

The whole Utica prank? Amazing. And those costumes? Even amazing-er. They looked like Mario and Luigi and their less famous brother, Vinnie, set out to defeat the Utica branch. I'll let you decide who's who, but let's just say that I'm sure Mario and Luigi needed someone to keep the car running while they conquered Big World. And that this whole "The Office as Super Mario Bros. 3" scenario would make Karen Bowser and Stanley Peach.
irishmizzy

Jim
Jim clapping when Karen's name was mentioned in Michael's announcement about Stanley? Instead of looking kind of moody? I didn't think it was very Jim-y. In fact I'm convinced that wasn't him, at all. I suspect something to do with aliens. Or beets. Or Meredith.
falulatonks

Jim gets humiliated. A lot. It is awesome.
paper_jam11

B.J. NOVAK. You know that little dude was sitting in his writer's office going, "Man, I am going to embarrass the CRAP out of Krasinski this week. SCORE!"
greenfish

THERE WAS JIM, AND THERE WERE PEGS, AND THEN HE GOT TAKEN DOWN A FEW.
dudski

This episode was over an hour late to NBC.com, which I found highly frustrating as I was fast losing focus on my paper and needed to see the episode again. Picture me at 5 AM, throwing pencils at the computer screen. "I wanna see more of Angry Jim! I want Angry Jim!" I can't remember when we've seen him as frustrated as when they got rid of his phone. It's kinda hot.
rainbowstevie

Also, learning Jim has a brother (and subsequently, a nephew) is just the gift that keeps giving. Seriously, if you ever need to go to your happy place, think about this; Jim Halpert holding a baby. Ponder on that, but not too hard, because I don't want to be responsible for all the ovarian damage it will inevitably cause.
chibirhm

The Finer Things Club
Jim getting blacklisted from The Finer Things Club for monopolizing the funny is the greatest thing in the history of great things. Season Four Finer Things Jim here we come. Don't blow it, dude. Ned The Pie Maker is standing by to replace you as my dysfunctional TV boyfriend. And he bakes. Thin ice, mister. Thin ice.
paper_jam11

PAM & TOBY ARE DISCUSSING LITERATURE and it is the most vindicating thing ever. Or at least it was until she invited Jim to join. You realize that this just broke Toby's heart, right? That was his last refuge from the PB&J flirting. I think it's pretty obvious that FTC day is to him what Pretzel Day is to Stanley.
rainbowstevie

Odds and Ends
I'm so glad that Dwight taught me that eyes are the groin of the head, because that was neglected in my Miss Congeniality Guide to Self Defense.

It's amazing what you can learn from watching TV. Just by being a bum on my couch I have made it approximately 15% less likely that I will be raped in a dark alley. Thank you, Dwight. Thank you.
chibirhm

What happened to Angela? Did she need a full day of repentance after a night with Andy? Five turns of the rosary while bathing in holy water?
themightybee

4.05 - Local Ad

2007-11-01T02:48:16Z

Sorry the meta's late, you guys. I was busy handing out candy to children. How dare I, I know.

Ugh, why must we go back to only half hours?!? I feel so spoiled. Damn you first 4 weeks! And I of course don't mean that as you were incredible. Never leave me.
cashewdani

Ryan
I bet you a million dollars that Ryan actually and truly believed he had Eddie Murphy on the phone because he honestly and truly believes he's that important. Oh, Ryan.
chibirhm

Oh, and also, I was totally cool with Michael telling David Wallace that Ryan is being a little bitch again. Except for the fact that again implies there was a time when he stopped being one.
cashewdani

Ryan, you are a bland, corporate blow-hard who will probably be fired soon for malfeasance. Oh, I'm sorry! Was that too creative? You're lame.
secondrink

The Commercial
I was all, "their commercial really needs a jingle," and I talked to myself about all the awesome jingles I'll never forget (Martin's supermarket! Gurley Leep! 800-588-2300, Empire! Stanley Steemer! The Westchester County Fair (yeah)! ... you get the idea.) And then, after the break, DARRYL WROTE THEM A JINGLE! And it was awesome and had a line about Kelly and the chorus "people persons paper people!" That shit is better than any Staples commercial has ever been. Suck it, national paper conglomerate.
irishmizzy

You know that feeling you get when you're entirely prepared for something to be awful, and you're going to have to lie about it and say that it's good, but then to your surprise, it actually is good and you're so shocked by this fact that it somehow makes it even better than it would have been if you hadn't worried about it not being good in the first place? (I get this feeling a lot when I'm, like, proofreading my brother's essays for school and stuff.) That would be Michael's ad. Michael's ad was magnificent! It was so clever and sweet! With such a cute concept! And yet it was still so unfailingly Michael!
dollsome

I can't even do justice to how happy the ad makes me. I, like, want to wear a t-shirt with this ad playing on repeat to declare my love for it. I want to run through fields of daisies with it and laugh and play with puppies with it in a soft-focus slow-mo montage. I want to stand outside this ad's window and hold up a radio playing Peter Gabriel for it. I love it that much.
chibirhm

Andy
I originally thought that Andy was hoping everyone else would join with the "kit! kat! bar!" and was faking his brain fart. When I realized that he genuinely couldn't remember the subject of the most memorable commercial jingle EVER I peed a little. That was AMAZING. The only thing that could have improved the running gag was someone giving Andy a Kit-Kat and having it STILL not click in.
themightybee

I honestly cannot believe that Andy didn't know that was the Kit-Kat jingle.

Then again, it's Andy. Never mind. I totally believe it.
chibirhm

I want my own Nardog to give me backrubs. Even if it sounds like I'm training a robotic dog to do that. It would still rock.
cashewdani

What kind of candles does Andy buy for his aromatherapy sessions? Are they customer specific? I doubt that Yankee Candles carries anything that smells like Uptight-Cat loving-Accountantess...wait...the whole store smells like that!
secondrink

Dwight
"Oh, D." Hi, don't mind me, I'm broken inside as a human being. I honestly cannot take this much longer. I actually referred to Dwight, in all heartbroken earnestness, as "Dwighty." That is like two shakes away from a truly horrifying nickname. Dwangela, you had better reunite soon, lest utter devastation befall the world.
dollsome

I am really coming to love Dwight. I mean, I've always adored him, but I've definitely grown an added appreciation for him. I think Rainn Wilson inviting me to be his his "black Kate Moss tonight" may have something to do with it.
themightybee

Jim
I was dying laughing at his entire fantasy life. Like, really, Jim? Guitar-playing sportswriter in Philly? You didn't want to shoot any higher? Because I know that in MY imaginary life, I am friends with George Clooney and Justin Timberlake and Mindy Kaling and Helen Mirren and I don't have a real job, I just kind of be awesome. And I pay people to carry my guitar around for me. Because you know who carries his guitar around all the time? That Guy. (Also, Chris Keller on One Tree Hill. And HE talks in the third person and has horrible hair... Interesting.)
irishmizzy

Fancy New Halpert has fancy new clothes too! And that brown shirt is nice. Like, really nice. So nice he should take it off. You know, to keep it being that nice. That's my excuse. I'm sticking to it.
chibirhm

Chase those dreams, Jim! Luckily, these two are fairly into each other and I can't imagine Pam not helping Jim reach his goals...when he can finally admit he has them. (Spec: Maybe bumping into an uber-successful-and-totally-over-him Karen will give him the kick in the ass he needs? And I'm talking a literal kick in the ass. Karen owes him one.)
themightybee

And Jim slinging his arm around Pam in every guy's trademark, back off, she's with me move was sweet in its lameness. And I bet Jim went home and gave his avatar a motorcycle. And that Pam saw it and called him a dork and then they did it on his desk chair. Hot.
cashewdani

In Closing
Oh faaaaandom, who wants to write me a fairytale based on the Dunder Mifflin? The accountants are the bears and Kelly can be Goldilocks. Phyllis and Stanley can be Hansel and Gretl. And Creed can be the wicked witch and you can call it Into the Office. Ready, set, go!
irishmizzy