Note To Jedi

Thu, 11 May 2006 20:14:29 GMT

Oh snaps!

Just another random thingy...

Thu, 19 Jan 2006 01:37:28 GMT

Anywho, just another random thingy I wanted to post. I think it's funnier then my last one. And I just had something like this with my mom. Anyways, It's also a little lame...*stop rambling!*

To: Kenobi, Master Obi-wan (masterobiwan@jeditemple.org)
From: Skywalker, Anakin (anakinskywalker@jeditemple.org)
Subject: Keep this a secret with your life.

Master, I must confess something...

I must admit, I love Padme.

To: Skywalker, Anakin (anakinskywalker@jeditemple.org)
From: To: Kenobi, Master Obi-wan (masterobiwan@jeditemple.org)
Subject: RE: Keep this a secret with your life.

I'm not surprised.

To: Kenobi, Master Obi-wan (masterobiwan@jeditemple.org)
From: Skywalker, Anakin (anakinskywalker@jeditemple.org)
Subject: Keep this a secret with your life.

...Don't tell anyone.

To: Skywalker, Anakin (anakinskywalker@jeditemple.org), Naberrie, Senator Padme Amidala (senatorpadmeamidala@naboosenators.org)
From: To: Kenobi, Master Obi-wan (masterobiwan@jeditemple.org)
Subject: RE: Keep this a secret with your life.

Who am I gonna tell you like Padme? Padme?

To: Kenobi, Master Obi-wan (masterobiwan@jeditemple.org)
From: Skywalker, Anakin (anakinskywalker@jeditemple.org)
Subject: Keep this a secret with your life.

...I'd watch yourback tonight if I were you.

To: Skywalker, Anakin (anakinskywalker@jeditemple.org)
From: To: Kenobi, Master Obi-wan (masterobiwan@jeditemple.org)
Subject: RE: Keep this a secret with your life.

Ummm... ooops.

*hides*

Fri, 30 Dec 2005 23:47:24 GMT

To: Obi-Wan <dualitybites@otherways.net>
From: Vader~~kin~~ <vader~~kin~~@sithlords.org>
Subject: Our conversation earlier

Kenobi,

Stop trying to be my friend or whatever it is you are attempting. Your overtures are not appreciated nor wanted. I do not care about you finding it fun to chase your prey as it were and do not even think about including myself in that category.

Go away.

Sincerely,

Vader~~kin~~

Fri, 30 Dec 2005 19:33:36 GMT

To: Obi-Wan Kenobi <catchmeifyoucandarth@undisclosedlocation.net>
From: Darth Vader <sexyleathercladdemon@sithlords.net>

~~Dear~~ Obi-Wan,

Please stop sending me tasteless Christmas presents. Last year's effort (the lava lamp) was bad enough (though thanks for the chocolates). This year toasty socks? Don't think you can stay hidden from me. Your impertinance brings you ever closer to being found. And if you've hidden somewhere sandy, you're going to suffer. You know I hate sand.

No love,

Darth Vader.

The Hapan princess e-mails her mom.

Tue, 20 Dec 2005 00:06:04 GMT

To: admin@hapes.gov
From: allana36@jedi.ossus.edu
Subject: YAY!

Mom,

I'm having a great time at the Jedi Academy! Liza and I get along wonderfully, and Valin's daughter is going to be our new roommate! And I just made my lightsaber so I'm officially an apprentice now. I hope that Ben Skywalker picks me to train. He's really hot. :D Yeah yeah I know I'm too young for him but I won't be forever, like when I'm 18 and he's 27 it would be okay, right? g2g but I miss you lots! Tell my father out on the other side of the planet that he's a big stinker for not sending me anything for my birthday. Even Master Jacen Solo gave me something, this big stuffed rancor that was SOOO cute! I will send you a holo of it with my next letter.

Love, Allana

To: "Allana Djo" allana36@jedi.ossus.edu
From: "Queen Mother Tenel Ka" admin@hapes.gov
Subject: Re: YAY!

Allana,

I am glad to hear that you are enjoying your studies, and hope that you continue to take them seriously now that you are training to be a Jedi Knight. Danta Horn is a very nice girl and I am certain that you and Liza will get along with her as well.

No, it would not be okay for you date Ben Skywalker, ever. You see, your father did get you a gift for your birthday. Apparently it was a stuffed rancor. I will tell you more when you come home to visit; it is quite a long story.

Love, Mom

They're back.

Mon, 19 Dec 2005 04:45:59 GMT

Remember those Star Wars E-Mails I did a while back? Well, there's another one. I couldn't stop without giving a hint about those infamous Birthday Parties Palpatine has every year:

From: Palpatine, Emperor Mervin (sith_myster @ empire.gov)
To: Vader, Lord (so_wizard@ sith.bad), Clone Army (fistfullajangoes @ republic.minions.org)
Subject: Party Preparations

As you know, my birthday is coming up. I will therefore need the combined efforts of all of my minions to make sure that this year’s bash is even better than the last. Thusly, my list of required items is below:

100 gros. Party hats reading ‘Happy Birthday Palpie’, or the like.
100 gros. Each of plates, cups and little party napkins bearing the same message.
800 gros. Little party favors (I know last year’s ‘ewok-in-a-bag’ didn’t go over too well with the senators. Try for something a little less…inflammatory this year, shall we?)

Oh and, Lord Vader, try to get the non-lethal noisemakers this time. There were too many ‘accidents’ last year.

Ciao!
Your Friendly Emperor

--------------------------------------

From: Vader, Lord (so_wizard@ sith.bad)
To: Palpatine, Emperor Mervin (sith_myster @ empire.gov)
Subject: RE: Party Preparations

Master,

The shop messed up the message. I now have 100 gros each of party hats, plates, cups and little party napkins reading 'Happy Birthday Poopy'. I hope this is okay.

-Vader

Mon, 21 Nov 2005 02:20:57 GMT

TO\\Unknown Path\\Naberrie, Padme
FROM\\Unknown Path\\Kenobi, Obi-Wan
Encryption\\Level 10\\PRIVATE

My Dearest Padme,

I know you love me and that we don't see each other as frequently as either of us would like.

I love you, too. Very, very much.

But Love. Dearest. Sweatheart...this does NOT give you the right to pinch my ass in Anakin's presence. He's suspicious enough of us as it is. I do not wish to compound that suspicion until the events we planned for Mustafar go into effect!

You'll blow the whole thing!

See you tonight,
Obi-Wan

Just Something Dumb...

Sat, 19 Nov 2005 06:30:12 GMT

I just felt I HAD to join to post this. It's just something random. Stupid really...(and I made up these company names)

(Based on an actual e-mail I received)

From: queen_of_soup@fishy.com
To: master_obiwan@jeditemple.org
Subject: THIS IS NOT SPAM!

Dear reader, this is the truth. I read it in a magazine. It says that the Paper, Inc. company is going to file a class-action lawsuit against Batteries, Inc.

To make sure that Vellum Paper datapads are still the most widely used, Paper, Inc. is teaming up with Batteries, Inc. If you show your support for these datapds, you will receive 2,401 credits within the week.

I joined and received those 2,401 credits. To show your support, simply purchase a Vellum Paper datapad and send the Proof of Purchase number to Paper, Inc.

And...

Isn't it odd how no one is religious anymore? You really should practice some religion...

From: master_obiwan@jeditemple.org
To: queen_of_soup@fishy.com
Subject: RE: THIS IS NOT SPAM!

Do not contact me again.

EVER.

Okay, now I've let that out.

Wed, 16 Nov 2005 20:31:44 GMT

TO: Anakin Skywalker//Starfighter Next To Mine//Coruscanti Airspace//Private
FROM: Obi-Wan Kenobi//Starfighter Next To Yours//Coruscanti Airspace//Private

FOR THE LOVE OF THE FORCE STOP USING ME AS BAIT!

No love,
Obi-Wan

ooc: sorry. had to join cause pup wanted to say this...

Sat, 22 Oct 2005 21:26:19 GMT

To: Leia Organa Solo
From: Han Solo

Leia-

Don't get killed.

Love you.

-Han

To: Han Solo
From: Leia Organa Solo

Han-

What do you think I am, new?

Same to you.

-Leia

Wed, 12 Oct 2005 02:38:51 GMT

To: Obi-Wan (master_obiwan@Jedi-Temple.org)
From: Anakin (too_damn_pretty@Jedi-Temple.org)
Subject: A Simple Request

Master,

Will you please stop bringing up the gundark thing with everyone you meet?

Also, stop snarking at Siri and ... uhm ... do other things. Heh.

And I came in so late last night because I got lost on the way back to the Temple, did you realise how confusing the streets of Coruscant actually are? ~~and it had nothing to do with sneaking out to see Padme~~.

-Anakin

Sun, 02 Oct 2005 02:08:27 GMT

To: Master Obi-Wan Kenobi (oldman@jeditemple.net)
From: Senator Padme Amidala (naboosenator@coruscant.org)

~~Dear Obi-Wan,~~ My Dearest Love,

Yes, I believe running away with you is a brilliant idea. Bail's married after all, so I suppose it would be best to leave him be. You just have the Jedi Code to worry about, although I understand it's very difficult for you to go against and I understand your desire to be completely loyal to the Jedi. But Anakin's not quite so blind as he used to be. I think he's getting suspicious, so it might be best if we left together if we want to persue our relationship. Somehow, he found out that you keep visiting me at odd hours. I have to arrange the divorce with him before we marry, however, and I'd like to be far away when he recieves the divorce papers.

All my love,

Padme

PS: Anakin? I know you're reading this. In all seriousness, give up the stalking and the insane jealousy. And stop reading my mail.

PPS: In case you don't know better, because given your state of mind lately, I have my doubts... No, this isn't serious. At all. Ever.

Wed, 21 Sep 2005 11:06:56 GMT

To: Master Obi-Wan Kenobi (oldman@jeditemple.net)
From: Padawan Anakin Skywalker (darkskywalker@jeditemple.net)

Dear Master,

I know you are probably getting tired of dealing with me. Dealing with me constantly changing sides. But we have to admit, some of that is your fault! Because everytime I turn to the darkside you lure me to that uncharted planet. Where it throws off peaceful feelings and such. And even at times gives you memories you don't want to see! I hate that planet but at the same time love it. Yet again, its your fault. Well, duty calls Master. There are some things that I need to do for you today.

With all my love
Your Padawan, Anakin

P.S. I hear that blasted Xanatos is around as well, so I'd watch my back if I were you. Seems he holds quite the grudge.

Mon, 05 Sep 2005 09:35:27 GMT

To: Master Yoda (littlegreentroll@jeditemple.net)
From: Padawan Anakin Skywalker (darkskywalker@jeditemple.net)

Dear Master Yoda,

Please explain to me why you're trying to play matchmaker. I already have... a lover. Though I do not consider them an attachment. That would be no way to put it. I am theirs and they are mine. It is as simple as that. So please, quit trying to play matchmaker. I do not wish to make Obi-Wan anymore jealous, even though he hides it well by meditating and letting it be soaked into the Force, than he already is.

Sincerely,

Padawan Anakin Skywalker

Tue, 30 Aug 2005 06:45:28 GMT

To: Master Obi-Wan Kenobi (oldman@jeditemple.net)
From: Padawan Anakin Skywalker (darkskywalker@jeditemple.net)

Dear Master,

I would like to inform you that while you work so hard within the Force you have not noticed my absense. Either you are too busy playing around with the other Jedi or your Force just won't allow you to reach me. Why you ask? Because I'm on Myrkr where the Force obviously can not be used...

Waiting for you is the Ebon Hawk, it will bring you here. And yes, Master, I know that is Revan's ship. But between me and you... it was fun stealing it.

With love from your padawan,

Anakin Skywalker

Sun, 14 Aug 2005 17:01:45 GMT

To: All Members of the Rebel Alliance
From: Emperor Palpatine

All your base are belong to us. You are on the way to destruction. You have no chance to survive make your time.

Thu, 11 Aug 2005 04:54:12 GMT

EDIT:

From: (evil_sender @empire.gov)
To: padawans@ jedi.edu, jedi @jedi.edu, members@ council.jedi.edu, hottest_council_member@ council.jedi.edu, hotboy@ jedi.edu, pokemeanddie@ galacticmail.com
Subject: Plz read this, lik3, youll so reget it if u don’t!!

Directions: Fill this out and send it to everyone in your address book, including who sent it to you. If you don’t you’ll have bad luck 4ever!!!!!

1. What is your Full Name: General *cough* Grievous

2. What Color pants are you wearing now: me no need no stinkin’ pants

3. What are you listening to right now: *cough*

4. What are the last 2 digits of your mobile phone number(s): mine’s built in

5. What was the last thing you ate: who remembers? Must have been twenty years ago now…I think it was a burrito

6. If you were a crayon what color would you be: Black. Like my mood.

7. How is the weather right now: it shall be hailing fire and brimstone in a moment

8. Last person you talked to on the phone: Sidious. Wanted me to order several cases of balloons and party hats for his next bash.

9. The first thing you notice about the opposite sex: really now, what would I *do* with one if they even talked to me?

10. Do you like the person who sent this to you: I don’t like anybody.

11. How are you today: *hack, wheeze*

12. Favorite Drink: *cough*

13. Favorite Alcoholic drink: *COUGH COUGH*

14. Favorite Sport: playing kickball, with Neimodians as the ball. Great fun! *evil laugh*

15. Hair Color: *rolls eyes*

16. Eye Color: they’re kind of a sickly yellow-green. I really should stop putting off that appointment with my optometrist…

17. Siblings: I used to have siblings, but that was before my internal organs were incased in durosteel…

19. Favorite Month: *wheeze*

21. Last Movie you Watched: Terminator 2

22. Favorite Day of the Year: Lord Sidious’ birthday’s tomorrow…*glee*

23. Are you too shy to ask someone out? I don’t need no one but me.

24. Summer or Winter: rather partial to Fall, really…the leaves changing…*cough*

25. Hugs or Kisses: I don’t think I’m even capable of either of those *thinking up ways*

26. Chocolate or Vanilla: I never liked either. What does that say about me?

27. Do you want your friends to write back: Do I have friends?

28. Who is most likely to respond: those little Neimodian lapdogs of mine…they always do as they’re told, don’t you, my little wittle wap dowgies…

29. Who is least likely to respond: *shrugs* Sidious? Too busy with Party preparations…

30. Living Arrangements: if I can be considered to be alive….

31. What books are you reading?: Little Women

32. What's on your mouse pad: I have a direct link within my skull. Me no need no stinkin’ mouse.

34. What did you do last night: kickball with my wittle wap dowgies

35. Favorite Smell: I don’t smell

36. Can you touch your nose with your tongue: I don’t have a tongue…or a nose…

37. What inspires you: I inspire others.

38. Favorite fruit: I don’t eat, yet I do somehow manage to smoke…

39. Favorite vegetable: Tomacco

40. Favorite cookie: *sigh, cough-wheeze-hack-sputter*

Wed, 10 Aug 2005 03:37:19 GMT

From: (evil_sender @empire.gov)
To: padawans@ jedi.edu, jedi @jedi.edu, members@ council.jedi.edu, hottest_council_member@ council.jedi.edu, hotboy@ jedi.edu
Subject: Plz read this, lik3, youll so reget it if u don’t!!

Directions: Fill this out and send it to everyone in your address book, including who sent it to you. If you don’t you’ll have bad luck 4ever!!!!!

1. What is your Full Name: Obi-Wan ‘Master’ Kenobi

2. What Color pants are you wearing now: sort of a tan color…

3. What are you listening to right now: the never-ending sound of my former Padawan’s complaining

4. What are the last 2 digits of your mobile phone number(s): 30

5. What was the last thing you ate: some nasty takeout from this Rodian place Anakin dragged me too. He said it would be ‘better than rations’. He was wrong.

6. If you were a crayon what color would you be: Uhh, I don’t know…orange. Let’s say Orange.

7. How is the weather right now: You…don’t want to know.

8. Last person you talked to on the phone: Actually it was a Holo-conference with the Council about this stupid assignment we’re on….I mean…the assignment that’s ‘important to the Republic.’ Blast!

9. The first thing you notice about the opposite sex: *dramatic sigh*

10. Do you like the person who sent this to you: I used too, until I found this in my inbox *glares at Anakin*

11. How are you today: don’t even go there.

12. Favorite Drink: Jawa Juice.

13. Favorite Alcoholic drink: I don’t really drink alcohol, although after being corrupted by Anakin, I do enjoy the occasional ale or two

14. Favorite Sport: Playing mind-tricks on Anakin. At least attempting them.

15. Hair Color: ‘light brown with streaks of silver’

16. Eye Color: Blueish green

17. Siblings: none that I know of

19. Favorite Month: what’s with this favorite month stuff? Why would one be better than the others?

21. Last Movie you Watched: Black Hawk Down with Anakin. Felt sorry for that bloke that kept making Coffee for all the others.

22. Favorite Day of the Year: The day I finally leave this hell hole.

23. Are you too shy to ask someone out? No. I asked Anakin out tonight, and that’s when he took me for that nasty takeout. Last time I ever do *that*!

24. Summer or Winter: either. Whatever.

25. Hugs or Kisses: if you’re tired of living, sure.

26. Chocolate or Vanilla: Vanilla

27. Do you want your friends to write back: Anakin already did this, and the Council will probably label this as ‘spam’

28. Who is most likely to respond: I guess one of the Padawans?

29. Who is least likely to respond: Again, anyone on the Council *rolls eyes*

30. Living Arrangements: Just me now that Anakin’s out of the apartment. (he snores)

31. What books are you reading?: ‘The Inner Workings of the Mind’, and ‘Living With Clones, 101’

32. What's on your mouse pad: *cringes at Clones’ mousepad*

34. What did you do last night: I gotta say, Anakin’s habit of chucking stones at the Clones is rather addictive…

35. Favorite Smell: real food

36. Can you touch your nose with your tongue: Yes, but why would I want to?

37. What inspires you: being around thousands of people with all the same face…isn’t there something strange about that? I mean…it’s just me, and Anakin, and Jango out here…*lots* of Jango. I’m getting a headache…

38. Favorite fruit: Oranges. Anyone have an orange that’s not powdered?

39. Favorite vegetable: one that isn’t cooked into mush and packaged in vaccum-packed freeze-dried portions.

40. Favorite cookie: the kind with sugar.

Tue, 09 Aug 2005 01:30:28 GMT

From: (evil_sender @empire.gov)
To: (grr_arggh@ sith.org), (sith_myster@ sith.org), (pantine_man@ jedi.edu), (hottest_council_member@ council.jedi.edu), senators@ senate.republic.gov, jedi@ jedi.edu, hotboy@ jedi.edu
Subject: Plz read this, lik3, youll so reget it if u don’t!!

Directions: Fill this out and send it to everyone in your address book, including who sent it to you. If you don’t you’ll have bad luck 4ever!!!!!

1. What is your Full Name: Anakin ‘hotboy’ Skywalker

2. What Color pants are you wearing now: Black. Leather.

3. What are you listening to right now: Something by ‘Blasters and Flowers’

4. What are the last 2 digits of your mobile phone number(s): 42

5. What was the last thing you ate: takeout from some Rodian place. It was nasty.

6. If you were a crayon what color would you be: Red.

7. How is the weather right now: The same as always, I guess

8. Last person you talked to on the phone: *shifty eyes* no one…

9. The first thing you notice about the opposite sex: *skips question*

10. Do you like the person who sent this to you: Probably

11. How are you today: Alright, I guess...how good can you be stuck in the Outer Rim?

12. Favorite Drink: Tequila

13. Favorite Alcoholic drink: Ooops…I thought that’s what #12 meant…

14. Favorite Sport: Lightsaber Dueling with Obi-Wan

15. Hair Color: Sandy blonde

16. Eye Color: Blue

17. Siblings: Apparently I have a half-brother…

19. Favorite Month: My…best friend…was born in April, so I guess that.

21. Last Movie you Watched: Black Hawk Down.

22. Favorite Day of the Year: I gotta say, Palpie still hasn’t lost his touch with those parties of his!

23. Are you too shy to ask someone out? Why would I want to do that?

24. Summer or Winter: Rather partial to spring on Naboo…

25. Hugs or Kisses: Either, depending on who it’s from…

26. Chocolate or Vanilla: whatever.

27. Do you want your friends to write back: *shrug*

28. Who is most likely to respond: Obi-Wan had *better* respond!

29. Who is least likely to respond: I dunno, Mace? I think he hates me…

30. Living Arrangements: Uhh….just me…yeahhhh….

31. What books are you reading?: Who has time to read? I brought the latest Harry Potter, but I haven’t had time to read it yet…driving me nuts!

32. What's on your mouse pad: I’m using one of the Clones’ computers…you don’t want to know what’s on the mousepad, I’ll leave it at that.

34. What did you do last night: Sat around with Obi-Wan using the Force to chuck rocks at the clones’ helmets. Quite cathartic, that.

35. Favorite Smell: I love the smell of Padmé’s shampoo…That is…I’ve heard…

36. Can you touch your nose with your tongue: I can do more than that…

37. What inspires you: I think Obi-Wan’s infuriating calm.

38. Favorite fruit: I like Fruit. It’s hard to find out here..

39. Favorite vegetable: Ditto. Whatever’s *fresh* will do.

40. Favorite cookie: I like cookies. Lots of cookies.

Mon, 08 Aug 2005 16:50:50 GMT

From: (evil_sender @empire.gov)
To: (grr_arggh@ sith.org), (sith_myster@ sith.org), (pantine_man@ jedi.edu), (smartkid@ jedi.edu), senators@ senate.republic.gov, jedi@ jedi.edu, chosen1@ jedi.edu
Subject: Plz read this, lik3, youll so reget it if u don’t!!

Directions: Fill this out and send it to everyone in your address book, including who sent it to you. If you don’t you’ll have bad luck 4ever!!!!!

1. What is your Full Name: Anakin ‘cutiepie’ Skywalker

2. What Color pants are you wearing now: I just woke up….I’m not wear- Er, I’m in my sleep-pants….

3. What are you listening to right now: Something by ‘The Hutts’

4. What are the last 2 digits of your mobile phone number(s): Master won’t let me have a cell – just shoved a comlink at me.

5. What was the last thing you ate: Whatever it was they served in the caff last night…

6. If you were a crayon what color would you be: I kinda like Purple…I wish *my* saber could be purple…*glares at Master Windu*

7. How is the weather right now: Weather? There’s no weather on Coruscant!

8. Last person you talked to on the phone: Master Obi-Wan called to get me ‘the hell out of bed, you lazy teenager’ *rolls eyes*

9. The first thing you notice about the opposite sex: Padmé.

10. Do you like the person who sent this to you: I have no idea.

11. How are you today: Padmé. Er- I mean, I’m fine.

12. Favorite Drink: Pa- *shifty eyes* peach Iced tea….

13. Favorite Alcoholic drink: ‘not until you’re knighted, my young padawan…’ *rolls eyes*

14. Favorite Sport: Lightsaber Training!!!!!

15. Hair Color: Sandy blonde

16. Eye Color: Blue

17. Siblings: Nope. Just me.

19. Favorite Month: *shrugs* I dunno…June?

21. Last Movie you Watched: Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban

22. Favorite Day of the Year: The Chancellor throws such cool parties! I love his birthday!

23. Are you too shy to ask someone out? *blushing at the thought*

24. Summer or Winter: ANYTHING but summer!

25. Hugs or Kisses: Yes.

26. Chocolate or Vanilla: Yes.

27. Do you want your friends to write back: *pause* Yes.

28. Who is most likely to respond: Maybe Barriss? She’s at least got a sense of humor…

29. Who is least likely to respond: As *if* Master Obi-Wan will even *read* this…

30. Living Arrangements: Me and My master. In *separate* rooms. (he snores)

31. What books are you reading?: Harry Potter (I think it’s the fifth one…) and a book about Jedi History that is ‘required reading’ for sixth year Padawans. *sighs*

32. What's on your mouse pad: Padm- er…nothing…it’s….*shifty eyes* I don’t have a mouspad.

34. What did you do last night: *nothing*

35. Favorite Smell: *stop asking all these personal questions!*

36. Can you touch your nose with your tongue: *rolls eyes* Of COURSE I can! *does it*

37. What inspires you: Watching Master Yoda demonstrate Lightsaber Technique

38. Favorite fruit: Pears

39. Favorite vegetable: tomato

40. Favorite cookie: I like cookies. I don’t care what kind (whatever they decide to serve us in the caf *shrugs*)

Sun, 07 Aug 2005 06:08:11 GMT

Hope, I do, that a nice weekend you all had.

From: (evil_sender @empire.gov)
To: (freedom_4_all @ hotmail.com), (oobidoob @ tatooine.hut), (mistake_i_made @dagobah.yuk), (h0t_r0d @ falcon.com), (fuzzba11 @ falcon.com), (vespa_grrl @ aldaraan.net), (b0ba_r0x@ freewebs.com)
Subject: Plz read this, lik3, youll so reget it if u don’t!!

Directions: Fill this out and send it to everyone in your address book, including who sent it to you. If you don’t you’ll have bad luck 4ever!!!!!

1. What is your Full Name: Yoda

2. What Color pants are you wearing now: Pants, I wear. Color? Matter it does not.

3. What are you listening to right now: Listen, I do, to the living force. That, and prefer classical Jazz, I do.

4. What are the last 2 digits of your mobile phone number(s): The numbers I have, need to know you do not.

5. What was the last thing you ate: Partial I am, to chili cheese burritos.

6. If you were a crayon what color would you be: Stupid, this question is. Green I would be.

7. How is the weather right now: Always On Dagobah, the weather is murky.

8. Last person you talked to on the phone: No phones where I live. Cut down on long-distance charges, it does.

9. The first thing you notice about the opposite sex: interest me, such things have not, in hundreds of years.

10. Do you like the person who sent this to you: Like matters not.

11. How are you today: Such a broad question, this is. Receive a broad answer it will: ‘Fine’ I am.

12. Favorite Drink: Tea of many kinds, I choose.

13. Favorite Alcoholic drink: Commune with the force, one cannot, when drinking such things.

14. Favorite Sport: Sport matters not, however been known I have on occasion, to partake of ‘basketball’

15. Hair Color: When 900 years old you will reach, have as much hair you will not, hmmm?

16. Eye Color: Green they are, matching my complexion they do.

17. Siblings: siblings I have; many they are.

19. Favorite Month: what purpose, I wonder, would serve a favorite?

21. Last Movie you Watched: Memento.

22. Favorite Day of the Year: tell not the Jedi that prefer the emperor’s birthday I do.

23. Are you too shy to ask someone out? Ask out one time I did, laughed at I was.

24. Summer or Winter: If four seasons there are, why two only are offered?

25. Hugs or Kisses: Many of both I received when young I was. Lucky I am now, for the occasional pat on the head.

26. Chocolate or Vanilla: Mint, I like, with my chocolate.

27. Do you want your friends to write back: Matters not to me, who responds to this useless e-mail

28. Who is most likely to respond: Pretend to know the future, I do not.

29. Who is least likely to respond: Hear you nothing that I say?

30. Living Arrangements: Alone I live, on exile on Dagobah.

31. What books are you reading?: How to improve your grammar, Chicken Soup for the Jedi’s Soul, and ‘Sith or Jedi: The Anakin Skywalker Story’

32. What's on your mouse pad: Pad I have not. The table I use.

34. What did you do last night: Cooking, I was.

35. Favorite Smell: Like the smell of rain, I do

36. Can you touch your nose with your tongue: Other things I can do that many cannot.

37. What inspires you: Inspired I am, by the living Force.

38. Favorite fruit: Agree, I must, with Lord Vader’s answer.

39. Favorite vegetable: Both nutritious and plentiful the cabbage is.

40. Favorite cookie: A rare delicacy, cookies are. Prefer none, do I, but the one that is available.

Fri, 05 Aug 2005 02:28:50 GMT

From: (evil_sender @empire.gov)
To: (grr_arggh@ sith.org), (sith_myster@ sith.org), (pantine_man@ jedi.edu), (smartkid@ jedi.edu), senators@ senate.republic.gov, jedi@ jedi.edu
Subject: Plz read this, lik3, youll so reget it if u don’t!!

Directions: Fill this out and send it to everyone in your address book, including who sent it to you. If you don’t you’ll have bad luck 4ever!!!!!

1. What is your Full Name: Darth Reginald Maul

2. What Color pants are you wearing now: black judogi pants

3. What are you listening to right now: The Mortal Kombat soundtrack

4. What are the last 2 digits of your mobile phone number(s): I have a Pager

5. What was the last thing you ate: marinated tofu wrap and Iced Tea

6. If you were a crayon what color would you be: Black. Black and red.

7. How is the weather right now: Weather is unimportant. One can fight in any weather.

8. Last person you talked to on the phone: Master Sidious. Wanted me to do a Job for him on Tatooine.

9. The first thing you notice about the opposite sex: *low growl*

10. Do you like the person who sent this to you: You know what, I really don’t like anybody…

11. How are you today: Indifferent. People think I’m always angry, but that’s just a stereotype because of the war-paint.

12. Favorite Drink: mineral water with a twist of lemon

13. Favorite Alcoholic drink: don’t drink alcohol – messes with the mind

14. Favorite Sport: Karate and Judo

15. Hair Color: *snerkle*

16. Eye Color: All yellow and freaky looking. They’re actually contact lenses – my eyes are a kind of hazel-brown.

17. Siblings: My three younger sister, oh how I love them so!

19. Favorite Month: *shrug* what a stupid question!

21. Last Movie you Watched: The Matrix

22. Favorite Day of the Year: I gotta say, Sidious throws the baddest parties for his birthday!

23. Are you too shy to ask someone out? I did once, but he turned me down.

24. Summer or Winter: Whatever.

25. Hugs or Kisses: Neither.

26. Chocolate or Vanilla: Strawberry.

27. Do you want your friends to write back: *meh*

28. Who is most likely to respond: Maybe Master Sidious? Or one of those fishy guys that make me crave Sushi all the time…

29. Who is least likely to respond: Like the Jedi have a sense of humor or anything…*rolls eyes*

30. Living Arrangements: just me in my minimalist flat on Coruscant.

31. What books are you reading?: The Odyssey by Homer, and Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets.

32. What's on your mouse pad: Black and red squiggles

34. What did you do last night: Just a lot of reading, and fine-tuning my saber

35. Favorite Smell: the smell a freshly ignited lightsaber causes…

36. Can you touch your nose with your tongue: *sigh* idiots…

37. What inspires you: looking out into the stars and wondering about why we’re here; what’s our real purpose for being? Is there some other being out there more powerful than any of us?

*pause*

If so, how can we kill it and take its place?

38. Favorite fruit: Apples, if you can believe it

39. Favorite vegetable: carrots? *confused*

40. Favorite cookie: Almond and vanilla biscotti (pref. With a café latte)

Intermission

Thu, 04 Aug 2005 16:34:36 GMT

a little bit of spam before the next survey:

[modified from an actual spam I recieved last night ;) ]

From: (f0rc3_4_u@ freewebs.com)
To: padawans@ jedi.edu, jedi @jedi.edu, members@ council.jedi.edu
Subject: INCR3AS3 YOURE F0RC3 P0T3NTIAL!!!!

Force4you

This is absolutely safe & effective, and half the cost of other under-the-counter enhancers.
Advanced abilities & strong connection!!!
and satisfy your padawan like never before.
With in 20minutes, You can start having the connection you've been missing.
PLEASE CLICK THIS LINK
¡¡

The HTML graphics in this message have been blocked.

Thu, 04 Aug 2005 03:07:10 GMT

Ten points if you spot the Dark Angel nod...

From: (evil_sender @empire.gov)
To: (freedom_4_all @ hotmail.com), (oobidoob @ tatooine.hut), (mistake_i_made @dagobah.yuk), (h0t_r0d @ falcon.com), (fuzzba11 @ falcon.com), (vespa_grrl @ aldaraan.net), (b0ba_r0x@ freewebs.com)
Subject: Plz read this, lik3, youll so reget it if u don’t!!

Directions: Fill this out and send it to everyone in your address book, including who sent it to you. If you don’t you’ll have bad luck 4ever!!!!!

1. What is your Full Name: Her Royal Highness Princess Leia Organa of Aldaraan.

2. What Color pants are you wearing now: Pants? *phhhht* that is *so* last year.

3. What are you listening to right now: annoying Imperial delegates, squabbling about something-or-other.

4. What are the last 2 digits of your mobile phone number(s): 36, 24, 38

5. What was the last thing you ate: Pate with poppy-seed crisps

6. If you were a crayon what color would you be: something shiny and pretty…maybe silvery purple? Or a glossy pink? Oh, no wait, that’s lipstick…

7. How is the weather right now: I don’t know, let me check…

*pause*

Okay, it’s kinda sunny…

8. Last person you talked to on the phone: Daddy…he says I’m doing a *great* job in the senate!

9. The first thing you notice about the opposite sex: Do you have an important-sounding job like I do?

10. Do you like the person who sent this to you: Sure!

11. How are you today: Fine…I could be better with chocolate…

12. Favorite Drink: mineral water

13. Favorite Alcoholic drink: Apple martinis

14. Favorite Sport: Sport? Ewwww…

15. Hair Color: brown and shiny

16. Eye Color: brown and intelligent looking

17. Siblings: none that I know of…

19. Favorite Month: Election month. I *always* get elected J

21. Last Movie you Watched: Clueless

22. Favorite Day of the Year: my birthday?

23. Are you too shy to ask someone out? No. They always ask me out. And then I say no.

24. Summer or Winter: Summer

25. Hugs or Kisses: depends on how well you know me.

26. Chocolate or Vanilla: *scoffs* Chocolate, of *course*

27. Do you want your friends to write back: sure

28. Who is most likely to respond: I think maybe Admiral Ackbar

29. Who is least likely to respond: Mon Mothma…she’s *way* too busy these days.

30. Living Arrangements: I…uh, I still live with my parents actually…

31. What books are you reading?: Emma by Jane Austin

32. What's on your mouse pad: flowers and butterflies

34. What did you do last night: reading over Senate reports while sipping tea and listening to music

35. Favorite Smell: hmmm…roses…also I kind of like the smell of the cleaner they use in the Senate building.

36. Can you touch your nose with your tongue: *rolls eyes*

37. What inspires you: knowing that there are other people out there struggling to overthrow the tyrannical Empire that controls all of our lives.

*pause*

That, and rainbows. They’re so pretty.

38. Favorite fruit: Kiwi

39. Favorite vegetable: sweet peas

40. Favorite cookie: anything with chocolate in it

KotOR has Star Wars in front of it...

Wed, 03 Aug 2005 18:53:00 GMT

Kinda long, so behold the lj cut!

To: oldgeezer @ebonhawk.net
From: swoopqueen @ebonhawk.net
Subject: Look, e-mail!

This is cool. We all have e-mail now. Anything you want to talk about?

And what's with your username?

----------------

To: swoopqueen @ebonhawk.net
From: oldgeezer @ebonhawk.net
Subject: Oh goody.

Nice. Now you have more ways to pester me. I guess harassing me in person wasn't enough? And no, I don't have anything I want to talk about.

Blame the addresses on Mission...

----------------

To: bluecutie @ebonhawk.net
From: oldgeezer @ebonhawk.net
Subject:

Mission!! You gave her my e-mail?! Now I have to figure out how this spam block works, she's never going to leave me alone!

----------------

To: stupidorangejacket @ebonhawk.net
From: swoopqueen @ebonhawk.net
Subject: ::pout::

You blocked me and changed your e-mail. That wasn't very nice. I just want to ask you some questions!

----------------

To: (341) 555-7865
From: (341) 555-6529

YAY TXT MSG! HI CARTH! WANT 2 TALK?

----------------

To: bluecutie @ebonhawk.net
From swoopqueen @ebonhawk.net
Subject: Carth's pager

Did he lose it? He's not answering...

----------------

To: swoopqueen @ebonhawk.net
From: bluecutie @ebonhawk.net
Subject: RE: Carth's pager

I think I saw him toss it out the air-lock, but I'm not sure. That's OK, though, I'll find you new e-mails. He's cute when he's tearing his hair out, for an old guy =:)

----------------

To: carth.onasi @fleet.republic.mil "Captain Carth Onasi"
From: swoopqueen @ebonhawk.net
Subject: C'mon...

You know you want to talk. Wouldn't it be easier to e-mail me? You'd eat less foot that way!

----------------

To: swoopqueen @ebonhawk.net
From: carth.onasi @fleet.republic.mil "Captain Carth Onasi"
Subject: RE: C'mon...

Dammit woman, leave me alone! I don't want to e-mail about anything either! Now you have Bastila in on it, too? She's the only one who knew this e-mail!

----------------

To: swoopqueen @ebonhawk.net
From: noreply @fleet.republic.mil
Subject: Returned e-mail

Attached is your e-mail. We were unable to deliver it.

Attachment: HWHYSSBCSHREEWEGW.eml

----------------

To: wargrowrror @kashyyyk.gov
From: swoopqueen @ebonhawk.net
Subject: Hee.

You can run, but you can't hide! Come on, just talk to me :)

----------------

To: swoopqueen @ebonhawk.net
From: wargrowrror @kashyyyk.gov
Subject: RE: Hee.

Rowerrgrollrrwawr? Grrorkghhrraaw.

----------------

To: wargrowrror @kashyyyk.gov
From: swoopqueen @ebonhawk.net
CC: fuzzball @ebonhawk.net, bluecutie @ebonhawk.net
Subject RE: RE: Hee.

Give it up Carth, I know it's you, and I know you can't speak Shyriiwook, much less type it. Mission and Zaalbar should get a kick out of it, though :)

----------------

To: swoopqueen @ebonhawk.net
From: bluecutie @ebonhawk.net
CC: fuzzball @ebonhawk.net, oldmandalorian @ebonhawk.net, catlady @ebonhawk.net, crotchetyoldjedi @ebonhawk.net, scarydroid @ebonhawk.net, cutedroid @ebonhawk.net, prissyjedi @ebonhawk.net, stupidorangejacket @ebonhawk.net
Subject: RE: RE: RE: Hee.

That was the funniest thing I ever read! =:D I'm turning purple here, I can't stop laughing!

It's hard to translate, but he basically asked if she'd like to groom him sometime. That's a total Wookiee come-on, just so you know.

ROFLOL! =XD

----------------

To: bluecutie @ebonhawk.net
From: stupidorangejacket @ebonhawk.net
Subject:

You're mean. You told me what to type, you bratty little kid! Everyone's against me!

----------------

To: thisisnottheaddressyouarelookingfor @council.jedi.org
From: swoopqueen @ebonhawk.net
Subject:

How did you convince Bastila to give you a Jedi e-mail account?

Just give up already, you know you want to talk!

----------------

To: pilot @ordo.mandalore.gov
From: swoopqueen @ebonhawk.net
Subject: How'd you manage this?

Canderous gave a Republic flyboy a Mandalorian address? I'm impressed. Now tell me all about how you managed that.

----------------

To: 3489864543342ou7376578698djy69879879pzdeug868lpi765465332342 @t3-m4.net
From: swoopqueen @ebonhawk.net
Subject:

I had to use up 453 computer spikes to slice into T3 to get this address! Why are you avoiding me? I just want to ask some questions!

----------------

To: swoopqueen @ebonhawk.net
From: stupidorangejacket @ebonhawk.net
Subject:

AND PEOPLE WONDER WHY I'M A PARANOID BASTARD!!! STOP STALKING ME!

----------------

To: swoopqueen @ebonhawk.net
From: bluecutie @ebonhawk.net
Subject: Maybe you should stop...

I know I said he was cute when was tearing his hair out, but I don't think he's got much hair left. And he keeps stomping around raving about cyberstalkers and pointing his blaster at his e-mail client. Considering it's right next to the flight controls, maybe you should lay low for a while.

Maybe a week or two. Then you can try e-mailing Carth at sithdaddy @sithacademy.edu. You know he's desperate if he convinced Dustil to set him up an address =XD