taking a picture of it on my shoulder resulted in failure by blurriness. the little shit never stays still for more than 2 seconds. it prefers to climb up my chest and get right under my chin and stick its nose in my ear. so here is the kitten and my boobs.

anyway, artie finally made me DL mapleps. that's all i've been doing for the past couple days. it's actually pretty fun, i'm a cute bishop named Eevee :D

I PASSED THE PHARM 101 PAPER along with everything else!!!!

just.

Oh wellm, Cs get degrees.

I demand the one month holiday to begin again.

Reasons being:

1. It did not feel like a month

2. Not wanting to be a geek during semester two; WHICH IS FREAKING STARTING TOMORROW.

"You're drunk, Ivan," said his brother.
"I hate you," Ivan replied. "You're an idol."

eavesdrop

join

My first half of laundry has just come out of the dryer. Subsequently, and it is rather obvious to say, I am not the least packed yet. I guess I'm probably not getting much sleep tonight.

Early this afternoon I leave for the high school camp, Fun in the Son, in Jekyll Island, Georgia. While I'm not particularly jazzed about the actual camp, I am excited about the time I will get to spend with the youth girls, as well as just having good ol' quality time with God. I have been exhausted recently, it will be nice to have time of worship and prayer all week.


This week I really feel I need to focus on a few verses that struck me and have kept coming back to me since TJ's Bible Study last Wednesday:
Colossians 4:2 [Devote yourselves to prayer with an alert mind and a thankful heart. (5)Live wisely among those who are not believers, and make the most of every opportunity.]
Also, [There is a wide-open door for a great work here, although many oppose me.] 1 Corinthians 16:9 has been pecking at me, too. I don't know. None of it fits together right now.

Sometimes the right time seems like the wrong time. Sometimes the right place seems like the wrong place. We make it all more difficult than it is.
Maybe that's where I am now.
I think maybe we're just very tired.


I'd like to fastforward and just catch a glimpse of three years from now. Heck, if as much changes in the next year as it has this one, I can't even imagine what will be going on. But I'm looking forward to it. I'm being lead somewhere phenomenal. He's in complete control and it's dazzling, but frightening as hell.



I need to pray with others more. I need to work on that.

I would like to own a Holman bible.

 My life is cloudy with a 60% chance of lame.
I love that.

I finally had the opportunity to watch The Dark Night yesterday. It definitely lived up to its hype. I remember my brother telling me it was draggy at some parts. But after watching it, I totally disagree with what he said. It wasn't at all draggy. I didn't even realize that the movie was almost three hours long.

I wouldn't say that it's one of the best movies I've seen, but I can safely say that it's the best I've seen in a while. I loved the Joker. Heath was brilliant. I really loved how he acted the Joker in his own style.

Darn, bloody trials are in like, two weeks.

Last night I spent the night at Maya's house, and today we went to Jesse's at around eleven. We baked a cake (Well, I did. They just watched.) And then Cody and JP came over. We went to Taco Bell, and played "spin the phone" with dares haha. It was actually really funny. Then we went back to Jesse's and Cody and I played Battleship. (Of course I won.) I feel kind of bad for Jesse because Maya is so bored all the time and is never interested in anything that he says, but he's actually a pretty cool guy. I'm actually in bed right now with Maya, Jesse, and Cody watching Dave Chapelle/Katt Williams haha (JP left a bit ago.) I like hanging out with new people. Maya and I are about to leave to go to lunch with Uncle Tom and Aunt Kanitta.
Ahh Maya and Jesse are trying to get me to kiss Cody. I don't want to because for one he lives in Seattle and secondly, it's not like I go around just kissing anyone. Hell, I have only kissed or even cuddled with two people in the past three years.

I'm back at Maya's now, we went to California Pizza Kitchen and it was pretty great but I feel like I'm going to explode now.

Jesse was being kind of annoyingly pushy about Cody and I kissing. We were all laying in his bed, I was next to Cody but we were like a foot away from eachother. Jesse would suddenly push Cody into me and like crush me against the wall, trying to get us to kiss. Then, I looked at Jesse's phone, and he had texted Cody saying, "she thinks you're really hot, go for it" but I didn't find him attractive at all, looks or personality wise. He was seventeen, but was really immature. I honestly thought that he was twelve at first. Ick.

Until the truth becomes a lie.

I can never fathom this.
Now, a body wracked with pain as realisation sets in.
Falls. 

Flickr won't upload for me for some reason, so I raided Alex Suarez's and picked ot my favorites to make a small picspam. Also, included at the end, are some pictures of Gabe and Bianca for anyone who's interested.

( Photos from Alex's flickr, including random FBR appearances Gabe/Bianca )

ok ok ok ok i know i've been complaining about how much i hate the new last.fm for the past week
but one feature i am in love with is the radio for events. i went onto the warped [iknowiknow] event page for some random city and i noticed there's a radio player sampling stuff from all the touring artists..which is pretty dang epic. obviously i don't want to listen to warpeds radio since its all faggy bands bar a few like rise against or diofy,y? etc etc but lol i like that. i also like the little 'on tour' stamp artists get next to their name when theyre touring
OTHER THAN THIS I STILL H8 IT OK

sometime soon i am going to pick up all of my stuff and relocate. this summer's given me ample time to think about my (near) future. there are so many different things i want to be involved in and a long list of places i'd like to be! in thinking about what i'll be up to in a few months to a year or two from now, i can only imagine myself starting completely anew, even if temporarily. i'm going to be away from oberlin, though, that's for sure. i'll initiate distance from the institution that's determined my entire life for the past two years, and return with less dependence, more perspective, and more appreciation. college is transient anyway, so it's not wise for me to have it as the nucleus of my livelihood. as much as i value the kind of education i'm receiving, i know there's a lot more out there for me to be involved in, learn from, and contribute to.

i've been burned out on school for the past couple of months, and doing research this summer certainly didn't help. things i love doing like reading and writing aren't exciting anymore. they've become obligations that i need to perform for others; i need to create papers and analyses and responses not only to fulfill a personal desire to learn, but to produce a submission for graded value and quantification. ambition, perfectionism, curiosity, and a drive to be independent is a recipe for disaster because it the product of these factors is overextension and eventually, exhaustion. i'm so fucking depleted (mentally/emotionally/xyz) because of this year. i need to rescind a number of my commitments and activities and minimize my presence everywhere, doing anything from getting rid of a number of my belongings or deleting 13 photo albums off facebook like i did last night or quitting my co-op job that consumes 10+ hours/week.

i've been going back and forth between albuquerque and santa fe this week. the change of scenery, pace, and company is welcome. this trip reminds me of how much i love being in a city. ultimately, what i want is the anonymity a big city provides (because being surrounded by people i don't know makes me feel like there's always untapped potential and things/people to discover) as well as smaller, rock-hard communities to return to and interact with.

What I decided was Athletes Foot at Rick's the other night (while he told me it was a bug bite) actually just turned out to be a bug bite. It is between my stayed-home and had-roast-beef toes and itches and I am bummed because I've never had Athletes Foot and was kind of excited about it.

On HoboWars, I have already finished my mission and am now at the collapsed City Hall absolutely WHOOPIN Hobo With Nametag in Rock Paper Scissors Lizard Spock.



Today was my mum's parents' fiftieth anniversary. We ate supper at Clark's Fish Camp. It was raining so hard we couldn't see the river out the windows. It was marsh and then everything just... disappeared. Like we were on some island. Just us, floating. I sufficed my craving of Fried Pickles and ate Stuffed Flounder #13; it was terribly expensive and terribly delicious and I have a good amount of leftovers in my fridge to eat sometime between now and church tomorrow morning.

It was nice just being with the family. And still, after fifty years, I can look into Mamoo and Dad's eyes and just see this immense love. No matter how crazy they might drive each other at times, no matter how they might be bickering, you can really just look at them and see this craving they have for each other. My uncle told a story in his toast this evening-- A pastor he worked with at Columbia Seminary told him how he could remember looking out from the pulpit at FPC and seeing my grandparents sitting in the pews, some 18 or 20 years ago, and "can remember thinking, they just couldn't keep their hands off one another. At their age!" And my grandparents have always been like that, I remember when I was a child I would sit between them and Dad would wrap his arm around me so he could have his hand on her shoulder, or holding her hand.

I want to build a family. My own family. I want years and years of this obvious LOVE, that just pours from my eyes and my pores and my soul. Giddy love. Serious love. Simple love. Hard love.
Raya. Ahava. Dode.


I feel very adrift now. I want to watch Legally Blonde.

http://www.giantmicrobes.com/us/products/pox.html

can someone PLEASE buy me all of that stuff

Warped in Maryland was pretty awesome. I'm not used to a place that has grass and trees all over the place, but that was one of the positive things on the pros and cons list sullenriot19 and I were making throughout the day in contrast to Englishtown. Maryland was motherfucking classy. You could get sushi. I mean, what is that? Overall I had a really great time, checked out The Higher, a sweet Japanese ska band, Relient K (who has a new album out, what?), Forever The Sicket Kids, We The Kings, Jack's Mannequin, Cobra Starship, and Gym Class. We missed The Academy Is..., which we were both pretty upset about, but the major downer of the day for me was that I didn't get to meet Andrew McMahon. Jack's had a meet and greet and I waited on line for an hour or something crazy like that, the their security guy cut off the line 5 people in front of me :( I walked to tent after and saw that everyone could get a picture with him, and Andrew was being so friendly. I'm hoping that I can meet him at the Paramore show in August, which, I should get my tickets for asap. I did get to take some sweet paparazzi-esque pics of Cobra, and shouted at Alex again because I love him.

Downloaded Miley's new cd because I couldn't help myself. I love it. I honestly love her so much, she's so fun and ridiculous. I don't necessarily think the world needed another version of 'Girls Just Want To Have Fun', but whatever. I'm going to burn it for the girls I babysit as a surprise on Monday :D

Bruce Springsteen in ONE WEEK!

up to 4g.
i work a lot. make coffee make coffee make coffee hay. a lot. BUT that's good. because it also means i save a lot. shit i just remembered i'm supposed to be cleaning.