Hello quizlings and quizlingas! As previously reported, I'm in Kenya. So, yeah, things will be a bit delayed this time around. However, that's no excuse for you not to play this- err, last week's quiz. Sorry for the delay; it's been hectic, and between planning and flying and stuff, I ran out of time. But answers will show; they just might be a bit late. However, there will be monkeys, as soon as I upload pictures of real live monkeys. And if we're lucky, lions too. Probably no tigers.

Go! Play! Take Quiz! Only in Kenya!

So, here we are, a week late, and... yeah. Some minor technical difficulties, most of which involve me going to Kenya for a work trip. Yes, that Kenya. Yes, with lions and tigers. Except not so many tigers. Nor bears. Anyway, the point is, sorry, things are crazy, and at long last here's a quiz to keep you busy. My bad. And, in all probability, answers will be late as well, unless Kenya starts treating me nicely. We'll see how that turns out.

Meanwhile, cheap quiz.

1. What movie starring Seann William Scott involved him selling sperm, stealing a school bus from a blind lady, and leaving Tom Green behind to care for a voracious snake?

2. You can’t travel this way anymore, but back in its day, some of the highlights of this path included Soda Springs, Chimney Rock, and Fort Bridger, which was actually burned down by Mormons, of all people. What was this path called?

3. What tale follows the adventures of Professor Otto Lidenbrock, his nephew Axel, and their guide Hans?

4. Fun with lyrics! Name the song and the artist:
Winter is here, again, Oh Lord
Haven`t been home in a year or more
I hope she holds on a little longer

5. What man-made object (or, for the politically correct, device of human manufacture) holds the distinction of having traveled the longest distance ever?

6. Tell us your favorite travel story.

Where's that damn quiz?

...oh yeah, that would be me.

Sorry folks, minor technical delay here. It's been a helluva week. We'll get back to you shortly. Meanwhile, have a practice quiz:

1. What is your name?
2. What is your quest?
3. What is your favorite color?
4. What is the capital of Assyria?
5. What is the air speed velocity of an unladen swallow?
6. What's your favorite funny quote? (Monty Python optional)

Stop. Wait. Quiz Pending.

Remember, Remember, the twelfth of November,
A quiz to be played if you've not,
Quizlings should never a kitten dismember
Unless it's been cooked in a pot.


...perhaps I need to work on my poetic skills a bit. But that's irrelevant. Go! Play! Take Quiz!

1. What was the longest running soap opera in television history?

2. "Sandman" character Delirium was once known by what name?

3. Sylvester Stallone and Viggo Mortensen star in which 1996 disaster film?

4. Artists Lori Kanary and Mark Beekman have each held world records in creating the largest versions of what toy?

5. "10538 Overture" was the first song produced by which band?

6. What lights up your day?

...and by the power of ham, we have come to the eleventh month. Hooray for ham!

Ok, ham has nothing to do with this. Pudding does, though. Not ham pudding; that sounds unpleasant. But not as unpleasant as the unpleasantness that might unpleasantly occur should you skip out on this week's quiz of un-unpleasantness. Play it now! Before calamity strikes! Unless you paid Calamity to strike you, in which case, carry on.

Go. Play. Take Quiz.

1. Fun with lyrics! Name the song:
Don't tell me the lights are shining
Anyplace but there
We will dance the "Hoochie-Koochie"
I will be your "Tootsie-Wootsie"

2. What Russian city was named Leningrad until 1991?

3. Who is the current Welterweight Champion of the UFC?

4. The character Simon Templar is more commonly referred to as whom?

5. Fun with quotes! Name that film:
"So now we got a huge guy theory, and a serial crusher theory. Top notch."

6. What's the nicest thing you've ever done?

The extra F's are for Fun! Frolicking! Fahrvergnuegen! Fornicating! And maybe Forgetfulness, if you've forgotten to fill out this week's quizly goodness. If you have, then F is for Fanfriggintastic! If you forgot, then F is for Failure Most Foul. But you can change Failure to Fanfriggintastic in one quick step! Just fill out the quiz, and watch failure melt away, like fat in Fight Club. Funderful!

This post brought to you by the letters F and PH, and by the hexadecimal number F, because fifteen has two F's. Two! That's more than one! And that's terrible.

1. What cartoon characters were known for "bouncing here and there and everywhere"?

2. Diane Keaton plays a schoolteacher looking for sex and drugs in which 1977 film?

3. According to myth, what was formed during a "suckling malfunction" between Hera and Heracles?

4. "Twenty Years After" and "The Vicomte de Bragelonne" are sequels to which novel?

5. The last words of Pheidippides were "We have won." Who had won what?

6. If you had to completely give up all candy and sweets, what would you miss most?

As occasionally happens, Thursday sneaks by my awareness with ninja-like stealth and subtlety, and suddenly Friday is there, laughing at my inattentive ways. Oh well.

That changes nothing around here, of course. You should still play this week's quiz. Kittens are still tasty. Fire still burns. And gin and pudding are still magically delicious. So waste no time! The weekend is nearly here! For some of you, the weekend might be starting in scant moments! So go! Play! Take Quiz!

1. What did George Spicer claim to have seen on 22 July 1933?

2. What 1950's horror movie, filmed in 3-D, featured Julie Adams as the "damsel in distress"?

3. According to Algonquin legend, what might you become if you engaged in cannibalism?

4. François Rabelais wrote a series of books in the 1500's about the lives of which two creatures?

5. Fun with lyrics! Name the song and the artist:
And then he swung from the tree and he lit on the ground
He started to rock, really rockin' around
It was a crazy ditty with a swingin' tune
Sing a boop boop aboopa lopa lum bam boom

6. What kind of creature (real or fictional) frightens you?

Remember those good old days when we had reminders on Thursdays? Where we said "Now's the time to play this week's quiz before time runs out!" and you all did that? Well, let's get back to that whole thing and recapture the glory of Thursdays. Mmmmmmm... Thursday.

Also, badgers.


Go. Play. Take Quiz.

1. The films "Airplane!" and "The Naked Gun" relied heavily on the writing talents of which two brothers?

2. What was the original name of the cereal whose mascots have included Cliffy the Clown, Sherriff Quick Draw McGraw, and Dig 'Em Frog?

3. The "Brawl in Montreal" on 20 June 1980 pitted Panamanian boxer Roberto Durán against which Olympic gold medalist?

4. What college football bowl game is traditionally held on New Years Day in New Orleans, Louisiana?

5. The documentary "Funky Monks" describes the time spent by the Red Hot Chili Peppers in a "haunted" house while recording which album?

6. What's your favorite sweet treat?