| Monday night... late |
[20 Jul 2009|11:18pm] |
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I took a three day weekend to get the car inspected & titled in my name & to get some work done around the house.
Social obligations pretty much stopped that plan cold. So it ended up being a fun weekend instead of a weekend of accomplishment. I can live with that...
Tomorrow holds a VERY early morning errand & then a busy, busy day in cubeland. I should go to bed but I'm sooo not sleepy.
This weekend also brought several people back into my life that I thought I'd never talk to again. We'll see how that plays out...
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| Fair chances |
[21 Jul 2009|11:14am] |
I am meeting up with the other manager regardless today, as he wants to give him a fair chance.
Technically, I am indebted to STKH as he had been the receiving end of HR escalations by my current manager. But I know my passion is still security.
I am chasing for release date by the end of the month as I seriously do not want to come back to Kulim. Kulim is a scary place (the physical assaults incident last November may ring a bell) and going there just to work.. is seriously I don't want to do. Not anymore.
It's a pain to go back to Kulim every single day and if workplace had been NICE, it would balance out. But right now, no.
I need to get out of Kulim.
I need something fast. I am setting the last date in BDCM on 31st July. That's the only date that I can tolerate. Yes, time is essential.
I will do everyone justice. I will do myself justice if I could wait and tolerate this for a couple more days.
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Snagged from ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) glowy_lovers |
[21 Jul 2009|12:11am] |
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RULE 1
You can only say Guilty or Innocent.
RULE 2
You are not allowed to explain anything unless someone asks!
- Asked someone to marry you?
Innocent
- Kissed one of your Facebook friends?
Innocent
- Danced on a table in a bar?
Innocent
- Had feelings for someone whom you can't have back?
Innocent
- Ever kissed someone of the same sex?
Innocent
- Kissed a picture?
Innocent
- Slept in until 5 PM?
Innocent
- Fallen asleep at work/school?
Guilty
- Held a snake?
Innocent
- Been suspended from school?
Innocent
- Worked at a fast food restaurant
Guilty
- Been fired from a job?
Innocent
- Done something you regret?
Guilty
- Laughed until something you were drinking came out your nose?
Guilty
- Caught a snowflake on your tongue?
Guilty
- Kissed in the rain?
Guilty
- Sat on a roof top?
Innocent
- Kissed someone you shouldn't?
Innocent
- Sang in the shower?
Guilty
- Been pushed into a pool with all your clothes on?
Innocent
- Shaved your head?
Innocent
- Slept naked?
Guilty
- Had a boxing membership?
Innocent
- Made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry?
Innocent
- Been in a band?
Innocent
- Shot a gun?
Innocent
- Donated Blood?
Guilty
- Eaten alligator meat?
Innocent
- Eaten cheesecake?
Guilty
- Still love someone you shouldn't?
Guilty
- Have/had a tattoo?
Innocent
- Liked someone, but will never tell who?
Innocent
- Been too honest?
Guilty
- Ruined a surprise?
Guilty
- Ate in a restaurant and got really bloated that you can't walk afterwards?
Innocent
- Erased someone in your friends list?
Innocent
- Dressed in a woman's clothes (if you're a guy) or man's clothes (if you're a girl)?
Innocent
- Joined a pageant?
Innocent
- Been told that you're handsome or beautiful by someone who totally meant what they said?
Guilty
- Had communication w/ your ex?
Guilty
- Get totally drunk one night and you have an important test tomorrow morning?
Innocent
- Get totally angry that you cried so hard?
Guilty
- Tried to stay away from someone for their own good?
Guilty
- Thought about suicide?
Innocent
- Thought about murder?
Innocent
- How about Mass Murder?
Innocent
- Tried illegal drugs
Innocent
- Rode in a stranger's vehicle?
Innocent
- Stalked someone?
Innocent
- Been so drunk that you forgot things that happened while you were intoxicated?
Innocent
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| Thirteen Years Ago Today... |
[20 Jul 2009|05:52pm] |
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Thirteen years ago today, my older half-sister Michelle Smith died.
By this time thirteen years ago, I, at 11 years old, was back here in San Francisco from what was supposed to be a fun weekend trip up to Petaluma with my Dad. It's hard to remember the specifics, but I know we went somewhere, and when we returned to the house and listened to the messages on the answering machine, the only thing distinct was my mom's voice, shouting and crying hysterically.
My dad asked his then-girlfriend to usher me out of the room while he listened to the message again to try and make sense of it. I went outside and played Patty-Cake with his girlfriend. I had no idea what was going on. I was worried about by mom, but for some reason, the thought of something truly terrible having happened did not --could not-- cross my mind.
A few minutes later, my dad brought me down and sat me on the white textured couch we had. White couches are a stupid thing to own. If you do own them, they're more of a statement than a functional piece of furniture. They'll always get dirty, even without an 11 year old and a dog in the house. (For the record, if you're stringent about cleaning and don't have those plastic covers over every piece of furniture, then I guess it's fine. Needless to say, my dad isn't either of those types, then or now.)
Anyway, my dad told me first that Michelle had been in an accident. The first thing that popped into my head was a rather steep hill covered in ivy not that far from our house. It's right beside the Rose Garden, and I knew my sister liked to ride her bike through there. I always thought it was dark and winding and scary. My 11 year old-self thought that there were bears and lions in Golden Gate Park, and that you were more likely to see them in places like that than up in the pretty rose garden. I imagined that she'd been biking on the crest of that hill and fell down, broke her ankle. I seem to remember stories of her having broken her leg or ankle before, so in my mind, it wouldn't have been the first time.
I don't remember if I asked if she'd just broken her ankle. I don't remember if I'd asked anything, doubting and scared, or naive and laughing. My insides were probably like Jello, just quivering, unable to stop.
I do remember being in the back seat of the car, stuck in traffic on the way back to San Francisco. I'd wanted a fun weekend in Petaluma, and now I had to go home. But I was worried about mom, freaked out about Michelle: I'd just had a fight with her about my Dad not long before I'd left, and I felt weird about going back home and having to "face" that, so to speak. I was thinking of how weird it would be, my mom and my dad and his girlfriend in the same room.
The next thing I remember, I was walking back up the stairs to my mom's house, to the dining room. It didn't look too much different from how it looks today. I remember my mom sitting at the head of the table on the left, her back to the piano my sister used to play all the time. She'd recently gotten more interested in the acoustic guitar, though. Besides, the piano was always out of tune, and Michelle was more interested in becoming a filmmaker than a pianist.
I remember the house being filled with cops. I got scared. I felt cold. I think it was then, seeing all the strangers in my house, my mom looking completely broken at the head of the table, shouting or crying or both, that I realized something was really wrong.
I don't really remember much about the next several days. There was a visit to the hospital. I'm not sure if it was for my mom to identify Michelle's body or to arrange for her to be sent to a mortuary or what. I didn't get to see anything. It was probably for the best, though seeing her at the funeral probably wouldn't have been much better.
There was a story that I heard in bits and pieces: Michelle had been out hiking with her friend Rayanna (not even sure if I'm spelling it right; we haven't heard from her since then) at Land's End, a stub of land not too far from Ocean Beach. Back then, it wasn't closed off, but everyone knew you weren't supposed to be over there. There were no fences, no railing, no anything. Just dry grass, dirt, rocks, and the ocean 200 feet below. Michelle and Rayanna weren't part of any sort of hiking expedition. There were no trail leaders or expert backpackers or anything like that. No equipment. I don't even think there were cell phones back then, at least not that Michelle or Rayanna would have owned.
Michelle fell.
I think I was told that death was immediate, that she wasn't in any pain. I kind of doubt that, nowadays. Part of me wants to believe it, of course, but it also hurts to think that she didn't --couldn't-- think of her family in her last moments. If she had, I wonder, would she have thought of how awful I was to still have a father when she didn't? Did she still think I was the worst bratty little sister ever, or would she miss me? I'll never know. It's one thing to tell yourself something to make yourself feel better, but the truth is something else altogether. They're not always the same.
Over the years, I've been to what I thought was Land's End a few times. Most of the time, I've been wrong. I went to the caves near the old Sutro Baths ruins, thinking that was Land's End because my dad told me that it was the "closest I'd ever get to it." I remember seeing people that had climbed over the rusty, single-bar railing sitting up on the rocks, wanting to yell at them because no matter how immortal or careful they were, my SISTER had died there. Were they even thinking of their family or friends in that moment?
There was another place, just past Point Lobos, higher up and surrounded by trees. It was a high cliff with a rocky beach below it, remnants of the Sutro Baths and the war cannon installations here and there. Some people had a tendency of making dirt circles and things like that up there. I kept wanting to see a symbol in them, a message from Michelle to me. Something.
I think this past spring was when I really saw Land's End. There was a sign there that mentioned Painted Rock and Land's End, talking about how dangerous it was and how people had died. Once, I think I wrote (or maybe I was tempted to write, I can't remember) "My sister was one of them!" on that sign. People still went right over the stupid rope fence and walked to take pictures of the stunning view of the ocean and the bay, the Golden Gate Bridge to the right and Marin County to the left. You could hear the fog horn, hear ships coming into port.
There wasn't enough room for more than two people to walk up there at a time, but there were still lots of people there. I wanted to yell at them too, but I was too choked up: angry at them, angry at myself, angry at the world. This spring, I went to the real Land's End alone.
Before, I'd been with other people. Some of those people I brought because I felt they needed to know the truth, the "me" that still was struggling with her half-sister/only sister/only sibling's death. Some of them I brought for purely selfish reasons, because I wanted comfort. I know I used them, and it was wrong, but my story and my feelings at that place have never been anything but the truth. I still think that it's hard for people who haven't really experienced death so close to them to know what I went through. They can just hug you or pat you on the back or say "I'm sorry," and that's all they can do.
For each person, what they need during that time is different. For me, I didn't know what I needed for myself. I decided to be the rock for my mom. Other people reacted to my reaction. The only person I remember being there "for me" explicitly was Christopher Garcia. He'd been a friend of mine at our after school program, Claire Lillienthal.
By the time summer ended, I already felt like it was the "Year of Hell." I didn't hold very high hopes for the remaining five or so months of the year. Having a transition like that, from elementary school to middle school meant that I changed a lot. I was a bitch in middle school. It could have been a lot better. I could have been a lot more mature. But I'd been through hell, and I didn't think anyone else could understand. No one really seemed to be genuinely trying, anyway. At that age, how can you? I'd hoped Chris Garcia would have given it more of a shot, but he chose popularity over me. That was a bit like twisting the knife already stuck in my chest.
He moved away before high school started. I remember seeing him on graduation. We didn't speak to each other, but I desperately wanted to. Years later, when I was working at AMC Theatres on Van Ness, he came to see a movie with a friend. I was so dead-tired that I thought I was dreaming. I didn't think to beg my supervisor to ask for my 15 minute break then, even though there was a line starting to wind throughout the lobby. He checked out the list of shows and couldn't find anything interesting, but he came up to my window in the box office, grabbed my hands through the window, and told me he was sorry for everything he'd done in middle school. He said he was a Marine now. I didn't stop to think for his phone number, his email, where he was stationed, anything.
I can honestly say he was the first boy I was ever truly in love with, and while that might have been a misplaced love due to the death of my sister, I'll always cherish what he did for me. Part of me still wants to see him again, if just to hug him for a good five minutes straight.
I made a lot of enemies in middle school, but a lot of lifelong friends, too. For those that stuck by me and have understood, that have come to know the truth since then, thank you. I hope we'll have thirteen and more years together.
This is my sister. I miss her very much.
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| Day 2: Oh Sweet Irony |
[20 Jul 2009|05:54pm] |
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Blogging every day of this deployment may be harder than I thought. It's day two, and it isn't much different than day one. Ok I'm not tearing up over commercials today, I guess that's progress. Thought that may be because I'm too busy cleaning and vacuuming everything in sight. Apparently, the family tradition of someone getting lice any time Hunny leaves remains strong. I kid you not.
- 11 years ago, he takes a job across the state, leaving us in our current home til he finds us a house. My Mother in Law brought my oldest daughter (then 4) home from head start. She got lice.
- 7 years ago. He goes to basic training. The school calls, one of the kids has lice.
- 4 years ago. He's preparing to deploy, we go home to visit. The kids pick up lice when we get home, no idea how.
- This year, a week before he left, it happens again.
WTF?? Why?? can't we ever have something simple? like the sink clogs? I guess I should be careful what I wish for. The problem is, I guess there's a family on post with several kids, that have lice and haven't been treating it. They don't live in our neighborhood, but the little critters have great travel skills. I don't even want to let my kids out of the house at this point. Oh sure they've been treated, and retreated, everything has been vacuumed, and cleaned, and bagged, and sprayed, they have been combed and checked and rechecked, we don't share towels, bedding, brushes, hats etc. Take EVERY precaution. Including using the treatment with a 2 week residual effect.
At this point, I HAVE to let the youngest get back to her friends. I can't keep her in all summer. It's just so hard worrying if I'm going to have to go through this again. Nothing really prevents it. I know the facts. They can only survive 48-55 hours without a host, once they HAVE a host they usually stay put, so as long as she isn't rubbing heads, using pillows brushes or hats that others have used she should be ok. I've treated the oldest, who when I combed her hair after had nothing at all, but she gets it again in 10 days regardless. I've bought tea tree oil shampoo because it's supposed to repel the little nasties. All new brushes too. Here's hoping that tomorrow I can let her go. And here's hoping she doesn't get the little bastards back.
Oh, the Irony i mentioned in the title...what I originally INTENDED to blog about but got distracted? It hit me this morning.
I knew my husband was my one and only, when I realized I couldn't imagine my life without him. Nine years after we got married he joined the army, and now I go months at a time without him BECAUSE I love him. Talk about "All's fair in love and war" eh?
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| You know my post about eyes and prisms? |
[21 Jul 2009|12:27am] |
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This post. Well, having moved from a horizontal prism to one angled 45º to the left yesterday, I am back with a horizontal prism tonight and even wondering if I need one that is about 25º or 30º to the right! How is a girl supposed to live/function like this?
I actually wonder if it is the underlying lenses that are the problem, however. I have astigmatisms in both eyes and know that they have changed since these glasses were made. My eyes seem to work better whatever prism angle I use if I tilt my glasses about 5º to the right. Sounds like time for new glasses to me.
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| WorldCon |
[20 Jul 2009|04:00pm] |
Hotel - check
Airline ticket - check
Membership - check
Programming schedule - check
I think that means it's really happening.
If you're planning on being there too, let me know! Maybe we can meet up.
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| Kiss in Hfx |
[20 Jul 2009|07:49pm] |
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While reading this article I started laughing at the fact one of the residence (Ms. Bray) who lives by the Commons is planning on writing a "victim impact statement" because of "three weeks since she’s had a good night’s sleep or been able to open her windows" which she's blaming on the (Sir Paul) McCartney and Kiss concerts. Even more laughable are (maybe) one or two comments that agree with her.
I wish I could've gone to the concert, but sadly I didn't have a ticket as well it had been raining and I didn't get sicker on top of what I'm already dealing with.
A Kiss good night for the Commons
By DAVENE JEFFREY Staff Reporter
Mon. Jul 20 - 4:46 AM
( How's about a KISS? )
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[20 Jul 2009|06:16pm] |
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Fuck everything.
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| websites i need |
[20 Jul 2009|02:34pm] |
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I need an online place to keep my movies list - a Netflix plus, if you will. I add the movie title and it gets linked to where ever it is available - Netflix, Amazon, library - any other place.
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I need an online place to check the availability, menu, whereabouts and details on all roving food in Seattle. seattlejo, you done this yet?
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Just now, I think I've found one that's been on my list for a while - a place to compile all the manuals for my stuff. http://www.theusermanualsite.com/
Edited later: I've already got a better scheme than this one. Fail.
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Will someone please get those other two built and quickly? Thanks so much.
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| Relativity |
[20 Jul 2009|02:19pm] |
We are in the midst of a major common area update in my condo building. The hallways are long and narrow with no windows or exterior walls of any kind. And, no air conditioning.
I just rode up the elevator with one of the workers currently working on the floor above mine - 5th floor. I allowed as how it must be rather toasty up there in that hallway today and he allowed as how it was and the view also fell short of wonderful. But, as I got off, he noted:
"But neither one of those things is a big deal in this economy. We're all glad to be working anywhere!"
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nitemirror made a crack on Twitter about NPR not needing to ride the Chapaquitic anniversary horse quite as hard as apparently they have (I missed it myself). And that reminded me of yet another Reason To ReUse Old News again coming up probably soon when Teddy Kennedy dies. I'll bet they already have all the shows in the can just waiting for the 24/7 airing of He Was A Saint And A Sinner... We really do need to shovel all of the he/she's still dead news onto it's own channel to free up everyone else for real news.
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| Blegh. |
[20 Jul 2009|05:14pm] |
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Since coming back from the Tim McGraw concert my throat has been really sore. But this morning I woke up and I am actually sick. I had a huge headache and my eyes even freaking hurt. I just feel like crap and everytime I get up to do something it makes me feel worse. I've had like a bunch of tea and it hasn't really helped yet. I have little to no energy and I feel weak. Atleast I am not cold though, you know...to look on the bright side. So it seems like it's mostly just a throat infection.
Here is hoping I feel better tomorrow because I freaking close tomorrow. I will just have to bring lots of meds and lozenges (sp?) to help me get through the night. I've had WAY worse colds and still gone to work and made it. It just sucks having to close. So long as Diane is not the one closing though I should be alright. she is uber slow and freaks out and makes everyone stay really late. Even if we're on time I'll be getting home at around midnight.
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| Losing an LJ friend... |
[20 Jul 2009|12:54pm] |
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teasdale has been and LJ friend of mine for years and years. Her niece just posted an entry that she died yesterday morning. She'd been suffering for a long time with pancreatic cancer and was ready. She was so generous with information about her disease. She wrote about what it felt like emotionally to go through it all and so she gave me a perspective on life that I'd never encountered before. She was single and lived alone like me without much close family - we shared that and cats and a similar point of view of many other things. I will miss her a lot.
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| Just go ahead and be happy! |
[21 Jul 2009|03:57am] |
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I have this serious issue whereby I am actively not wanting myself to be happy. I am actively looking for things that will continously hurt myself. (Why do you think I am still in BDCM? Hahaha).
PDC-CV is a great team. At first, I thought I would never blend in. I did. In fact, yesterday, I was surprised that people know me even though I don't even know them! They are from my future team :) STKH is a great manager. He's the only person that could convince me there are good managers in Intel when I was losing hope with my current one.
The only bad thing that I could ever think about PDC-CV team is.. nothing. There's nothing better than having your colleagues know and appreciate on things you're working on (LINUX!!). There's nothing better having a manager who is passionate about managing people.
I shut off CY, CY#2, ditmercury, ikhanokoto(whom by the way asked me to go with the boss who has nice hair and great ass! mm??). I deleted my journal and rechecked the previous entries.
This job is real. It has been waiting for me since my third month in Intel. I am going to have great colleagues who will appreciate my talent. I had been mixing with people from CV team for dinners for quite some time now. They are very nice people.
And yesterday was the first time in my life in Intel that I went to buy groceries and made it home at 6pm :)
What can actually go wrong?
Nothing!
When I think back, that's what's wrong with it. I am not attracted to nothing. I have severe commitment issues. I had never committed to do anything in my life. Not even deciding on a free car from my parents. Seriously. I am having that severe commitment issues.
So, now. I need to start acting like an adult. Commit to a job. Decide on which car for my parents to buy for me (Vios TRD version looks hot!!) and be happy. Okay, normal adults don't get cars from their parents. Too bad :P
I am going to let myself to be happy :) Sometimes, even though I have had it easy with my life, I can't help it if it really is easy :) Just be happy!
Emailed out acceptance and let's get moving!!
[comments disabled]
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| ФРЕНДОЦИД!!! |
[20 Jul 2009|10:10pm] |
После итого, как вчера вечером...
Собсно я не о том.
Произошёл френдоцид!
Не хочу, да и не люблю оправдываться, сделал так сделал.
Если, кто хочет вернуться в друзья. Можно отписаться тут.
Единственное: ответь почему ты хочешь вернуться.
Единственная просьба. Давайте оставаться цивилизованными людьми и не будем тут выяснять отношения.
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| Please, PM, may I have more? |
[20 Jul 2009|08:44am] |
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There is tons of work to do on my project but I'm not stuck with none. The project manager sends me chunks and I finished the last one yesterday and asked for more but nothing yet so I'm just hangin'. Hope I'm not hangin' long - it's a little frustrating. It could be that there isn't any more ready for me yet.
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I turned Netflix off this morning. There isn't anything in either of my queues that I'm dying to see or even really interested in seeing. If that changes, I'm going to check Amazon's on-demand. My Netflix is 'on vacation' until October 18. Should be an interesting trial.
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I need to make more breakfast quiche muffins. I ate my last one this morning. I thought I had more in the freezer but I was wrong. I need sausage to make them and my sausage was in the freezer. A big old bullet of the stuff - rock hard. It's now on the counter. Shouldn't take too long to thaw in today's heat. I'm not wild about firing up the oven in said heat but I gotta have my morning muffin!
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I am getting seriously crudmudgeonly about the news. Or rather the repetition of it. There seems to be only 1 or 2 news stories on any one day and my news sources are just beating the every loving crap out of them.
I think Michael Jackson just did me in. Or in compensating for no longer getting a daily newspaper delivered, I've over done it on the news sources. Whatever. I loved Walter Cronkite - in his day. I'm done with him now. He died during slow news period but one with a great tie in to the anniversary of the moon walk so while his death is not exaggerated, the coverage it is sure is. And I was not fascinated by walking on the moon 40 years ago and I'm still not. For christsakes, they don't even have any crappy restaurants there, much less good ones and not even a porta potty!
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It's very warm today and all the weather people can talk about is how hot it will be tomorrow. And, to add insult to that injury, they all report tomorrow's heat threat as a good thing. I hope all of them - even the men - grow old and menopausal and have 24/7 hot flashes for years and years and years.
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Ok, now all my bitching has been had for the day. Whew. I love my air conditioner. I love my east facing condo which will, in 2.5 short hours, be done with the sun for the day. I have a great life and I'm grateful for every single bit of it!
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[20 Jul 2009|10:57am] |
baka's having trouble with stairs and getting up from laying down. again. i don't know if she's torn something new or what (god i hope not, i don't have money for another joint surgery and i doubt her heart could take a major surgery anyway). i've increased her dose of arthritis supplement to the maximum allowable for her weight range and added a bit of pain killer. i also moved her bed into the living room, along with all the small area rugs to give her an easier walking surface.
i guess we'll see how it progresses this week. why does this stuff always come up right before i'm going out of town?
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eta: i also discovered recently that one of baka's sisters died last year. i'm amazed that my joint-disaster-area of a dog is one of the very few remaining from the two litters all those years ago. i love baka, wouldn't trade her for anything, and i love berners, but i'm not sure i could have another. i think there were 12-14 pups in those two litters. 9 years later there are maybe 3 still alive. i wonder if the other two are any healthier than baka or if they've each had so many surgeries and health problems.
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| итальянский |
[20 Jul 2009|06:39pm] |
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Итальянский - Божественный язык!:))
Изучать, изучать, изучать:)
А если учитель в виде длинноволосого итальянца с гитарой, то, думаю, обучение будет проходить намного любопытнее))
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| A great review |
[20 Jul 2009|10:07am] |
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Of Ages of Wonder: http://www.strangehorizons.com/reviews/2009/06/ages_of_wonder_.shtml
They said nice things about my story too!
Rather, some add an element of fantasy to other well-defined genres—the Western in Linda A.B. Davis's "Pony Up," the archaeological horror-mystery story in Pi's "Sphinx!" and hard-boiled crime in Queenie Tirone's "A Bird in the Hand." Pi and Tirone in particular offer more than an easy tweaking of well-known conventions, Pi providing some of the most impressive world-creation in the volume, while Tirone brings enough imagination and style to her story to make the familiar noir-with-a-twist approach sparkle.
Ok, that made getting up worthwhile. :)
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Comment Read 11
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[20 Jul 2009|09:53am] |
Hi.
Ok. Spam me with pictures of tiny little puppies, ok, because I'm THIS close to killing someone and having a nervous breakdown. In that order.
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Comment Read 4
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| Whoa.. |
[20 Jul 2009|04:59pm] |
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happy |
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WAH!! I saw the other manager, and we're having a meeting on Wednesday :)
And guess what? HE IS SUPER LENGCHAI!!! More than STKH. I'll meet him shortly tomorrow after Pat's meeting before a proper interview on Wednesday :).
Positive words from TWC today about the differences between the 2 managers. Both of them are nice :)
Me: I was just talking about you with WC
WC: I AM NOT LETTING HER GO!!
:)
I am going home now. Home is only 5 minutes away :)
p/s: SK F (GM of PDC) is also lengchai. Shit. This is where all the lengchai guys in Intel go :) PDC!!
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| Namárie |
[20 Jul 2009|02:04am] |
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 getting tired |
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Well it's the end of another day or the starts of another instead - but sad or merry, I must leave it now. Must heading off to bed. I dunno why it's still muggy as hell. Oh well.
Sweet Dreams all
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| Random joke |
[20 Jul 2009|02:02am] |
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mood |
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 Easily amused |
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"May I go swimming, Mummy?"
"No, you may not. There are sharks here."
"But Daddy's swimming."
"He's insured."
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Comment Read 3
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| GRRRRR! Pictures |
[19 Jul 2009|11:07pm] |
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 energetic |
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I accidentally erased my other post... -.- I usually just edit the old post and copy/paste it into a new one, but I forgot and pressed "save". Boo. :\ ANYWAY! More pics towards my 100! :D
Photographer: SammyJoe
Number of Photos: 5
Themes: 003: Feathered, 009: Colorless, 014: Wrong, 065: Dream, 089: Distance
I went to an Air Force Museum, so most of these pictures will be from there. I did take some other random ones, too, so enjoy. :)
Teasers:
 ... 
All over HERE
NOTE: You have to be a member of ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/community.gif) iamtonks in order to see the posts. Click HERE to submit your membership. It's not open, so give me a second to friend you back, and you'll be able to see all my pics. :)
Completed: 23/100
Aaaand, my total list done, list:
( And Here's The List! )
~Sammy-Joe
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| Clanadonia |
[19 Jul 2009|10:02pm] |
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music |
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Clanadonia - Tu bardh |
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These songs are awesome to hoop to! I really enjoy this group. I hope to see them in person some day! :-)
Crow, for some reason I thought of you while making this post... thought you might appreciate the tall, lanky, middle drummer from the vid... he's got a great groove! ;-)
Tu-Bardh - CLANADONIA
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Comment Read 6
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| What's missing from your car to make it the greatest ride you could ever dream of? |
[20 Jul 2009|04:00am] |
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 awake |
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 smart fortwo passion cabriolet - A chauffeur/driver for those days that I cannot see properly.
- Access to it 24/7 (I currently rarely get the use of it because hubby uses it for work) so that when I am up to driving and/or going out, I *can*, without having to wrestle with public transport.
- Unlimited free fuel - and preferably a more 'green' fuel solution than petrol/gas.
- Working air conditioning.
- Left hand drive (which it has) so that I can park at the kerb and get straight out onto the pavement,
- Convertible (this it is not). 
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| Immortal Beloved |
[19 Jul 2009|09:08pm] |
"My Angel, my all, my other self,
Just a few words today, and that in pencil. Yours. Only tomorrow will I know for certain where I am to stay. A worthless waste of time and such. Why this deep sorrow? If we could be united, we would feel this pain no longer. Where I am, you are with me, too. Soon we shall live together, and what a life it will be.
The journey was dreadful. I did not arrive here until 4 in the morning. At the last stop they warned me against traveling at night and tried to frighten me about a forest, but that only tempted me. The coach had to go and break down on such a terrible road for no reason, just a country road. And now I am held up completely, but I have found another, and we will surely see each other soon. Today, I hope. I have to see you. However much you love me, I love you more. Never hide yourself from me.
While still in my bed, my thoughts turn to you my immortal beloved, some of them happy, some sad. Waiting to see whether fate will hear us. I can live only completely with you or not at all. Yes, it must be. I must go to sleep now. Be calm, love. Today, yesterday, what longing with tears for you. You, you're my life, my everything. Farewell then, go on loving me.
Ever yours, ever mine, forever."
-Immortal Beloved [love letter from Beethoven]
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[19 Jul 2009|08:59pm] |
"Because he shut himself off the world, they called him hostile. They said he was unfeeling and called him callous, but he was not hard of heart. It is the finest blades that are most easily blunted, bent, or broken. He withdrew from his fellow man after he had given them everything and had received nothing in return. He lived alone because he found no second self. Thus he was, thus he died, thus he will live for all time."
-Opening lines from the movie Immortal Beloved
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| Describe a skill you'd like to master. |
[20 Jul 2009|02:56am] |
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 sleepy |
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Writing and/or drawing/painting. I am passable at both. I would love to be able to write my memoir / biography and get it published. Yeah, right. 
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| What "toys" from your childhood do you still wish you had? |
[20 Jul 2009|02:45am] |
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mood |
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awake |
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My ability to make believe
So that I could write fiction more effectively. I used to be able to make believe for hours with friends or alone. I could write stories and poems about imaginary people, creatures and places. I miss that.
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| Interesting times. |
[20 Jul 2009|12:50am] |
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mood |
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 less sore than I was |
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I have just reinstalled the old too-small used-twice-and-botched Fresnel (plastic temporary prism) on my glasses at 45º because the one that was installed (horizontally) was not working any more. I had been noticing that my double vision was now at 45º (originally vertical, horizontal at the last eye clinic visit and due to the MS, apparently, which is why it keeps changing). This fluctuation means that I cannot have glasses with a permanent prism and so I will have to cope with this feeling of looking through a bottle bottom with vaseline smeared on it that these damned fresnels cause so that I can see one of everything instead of two.
I had wondered why my right eye was hurting so much for the last three days and then I remembered the last time that this happened and decided to play with the old fresnel. I am s glad that I had kept it!
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| Magazines.... |
[19 Jul 2009|06:41pm] |
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mood |
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 impressed |
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Hmmm... I just ordered 24 months of Marie Claire magazine for $10. On the confirmation page it's offering me 1 year of Cosmo for $10... I'm considering it... Hmmm...
Poll #1432026 Magazines!
Open to: All, detailed results viewable to: All Cosmo? I only enter your polls for the tick box options
~Sammy-Joe
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Comment Read 3
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| Idunno |
[19 Jul 2009|11:24am] |
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 lazy |
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M79-Vampire Weekend |
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For the past few days I have had ear infections from hell. Seriously. I felt like there were fire ants in my ear canals. It was awful. I couldn't afford to go to the doctor as I lost my health insurance when I was laid off. For three days I was miserable and and slept a total of maybe five hours. Thankfully my mom still had some antibiotics from the last time I had an ear infection. So I am pretty much all better. I feel SOOOO much better! I even exercised, did laundry, and picked up my house. Now if I could get my sleep schedule back on track :).
My cats are becoming quite the hunters. Nearly everyday they bring me a lizard. Luckily they don't kill it, just scare it and swat at it for awhile. Cosby feels the need to bring them to me in bed, isn't that nice?
I have become my mother. I went to Verizon to get a new phone since mine was no longer functioning. I don't think washing it in the washing machine had anything to do with it, do you? Yeah. Everything was too complicated. I ended up getting a Blackberry Curve (hush, I know I am waaaaaay behind) and I feel like a giant doofus. I can't figure it out. I used to just pick a new think up and have it solved in under thirty minutes. Keep these new-fangled contraptions away from me. And while you're at it, get off my lawn *shakes cane*
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Comment Read 1
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