Call Me Madam ([info]ohsochewy) wrote in [info]knitting,
@ 2006-10-11 10:40:00
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Notes on gifting (for the holidays and beyond!)
The holidays will be upon us in no time, but like good little worker bees we have all started our gift projects with LOADS of time to spare. Right? (Right?)

Most of you have multiple ideas or projects already in the hopper. Now, as always, we want to make sure that the busy pace of the season doesn't get in the way of sharing knowledge and questions that benefit each other, not just one or two people.

We've already had several posts saying "Tell me what gift to make for my wicked stepmother/boss's dog/bazaar table." The mods agree that this is not productive. YOU know the person you're gifting; the 5,000 other members of [info]knitting do not. We also don't know your allergies, budget, time limitations, how fast you knit or what skills you have or lack, etc. If these things are relevant and would limit responses to your question, then you need to supply these facts if you want helpful responses. Also, if you've looked at and rejected some resources already, saying so would be helpful; explaining why you've done so would be even better.

Given that, we'll be keeping a close eye on the community for vague, nonspecific posts -- through the holiday season and beyond. You will be asked to either be more specific or remove your post if it's inappropriate. As always, Google search, LJ-seek and the memories section on the profile page are your friends. Reiterating from a previous mod post:

Not good: Tell me what to make for my mom.
Also not good: I have half a skein of Flopsy Bunny's Snuggle-riffic Acrylic Silk Substitute Yarn. What do I make with it?
Also also not good: THERE'S A PARTY TOMORROW AND I DON'T HAVE A GIFT/OUTFIT KNIT YET!!! HELLLLLLLLLP!!!!!!

Better: [The poster has Googled first and searched the Memories section or done an LJ-seek for some general ideas she thinks might work.] My grandma loves to wear pretty wraps, so I'd like to make her a longer stole to keep her warm. She is allergic to wool and most of the wraps she has are rectangular, so she probably prefers those to triangular patterns. I'm also rather new to lace knitting and cables, but I like a challenge. Could anyone suggest a simple pattern that would work well with a non-wool yarn? Thank you!

In general, we strongly urge you to plan, plan, plan.
--BE SPECIFIC. Narrow down what you want as much as possible and ask questions from there.
--BE REALISTIC. Even the most experienced knitters don't have unlimited time, money or skill. Pay attention to what you DO have; aim to do simple things beautifully and spruce them up if you have extra time.
--REALIZE THAT NOT EVERYONE NEEDS TO RECEIVE A KNITTED GIFT. If you don't know someone well enough to know what sort of knitted gift they'd like to receive, you may want to reconsider knitting for them. It's not just that the members of [info]knitting don't know any better than you do; some people are bothered by receiving overly personal gifts, and handmade objects may fall in that category. In addition, other people may not express enthusiasm proportionate to how much work and time you put into the project.

Only knit gifts for those you know will love them and respect them. Everyone will be happier that way. (Trust us.)

Wishing you a productive and rewarding season of knitting!




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[info]nosleepnever
2006-10-11 04:11 pm UTC (link)
This made me giggle. OMGZ I DON'T HAVE AN OUTFIT KNIT FOR THE PARTY TOMORROW WHADDOOIDOOOOO???

I'm so glad I bought my gifts last year before I learned to knit... :)

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[info]ohsochewy
2006-10-11 04:21 pm UTC (link)
I've been known to consider this myself. "Okay, the thing's next month, so I'll make a dk-weight pullover." "Okay, the thing's this month, so I'll make a dk tank." "Okay, the thing's next week, so I'll make something lacy on big needles." "Okay, I'm going to Macy's."

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[info]dg76
2006-10-11 06:16 pm UTC (link)
hahaha, i've had some of those very same conversations with myself.

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[info]catseatsocks
2006-10-11 04:12 pm UTC (link)
Word.

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[info]pickleboot
2006-10-11 04:17 pm UTC (link)
thank you.

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[info]faeryl
2006-10-11 04:22 pm UTC (link)
Thank you.

Generic "Tell me what to knit" posts tend to annoy me(I'm a firm believer of people using google to help them decide for themselves), so from the bottom of my heart....

Thank you.

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[info]apis_mellifera
2006-10-11 04:22 pm UTC (link)
Thanks! :)

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[info]jananaphone
2006-10-11 04:23 pm UTC (link)
Do the "not good" posts also include "I have this yarn WHAT SHOULD I MAKE"? Those irritate the freaking hell out of me.

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[info]ohsochewy
2006-10-11 04:26 pm UTC (link)
Good point.

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[info]faeryl
2006-10-11 04:47 pm UTC (link)
Hear, Hear.

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[info]tinystrings
2006-10-11 05:15 pm UTC (link)
There have been so many of those posts lately, they're driving me crazy too.

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[info]jananaphone
2006-10-11 07:39 pm UTC (link)
I am just like... I don't know! What do YOU want to knit?

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[info]blottedcopybook
2006-10-11 05:47 pm UTC (link)
I would definately agree on that one.

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thwarted!
[info]irihs
2006-10-11 04:33 pm UTC (link)
Wait, so it's not a good idea to try to design and knit a fair isle sweater for my neighbor's cousin's dog, using handspun qiviut?

You should have told me earlier. You owe me a $10,000 sweater by Christmas, Ms. Chewy! (It's a great dane, so you better get crackin'.)

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Re: thwarted!
[info]ohsochewy
2006-10-11 04:40 pm UTC (link)
That all depends. Is the qiviut pre-carded? Because I only use mine straight off the ox.

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Re: thwarted!
[info]irihs
2006-10-11 04:42 pm UTC (link)
Would it help if I just Fed-Exed the whole ox?

(Mmm, imagine the glorious smell!)

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Re: thwarted!
[info]ohsochewy
2006-10-11 04:46 pm UTC (link)
It'll have to be here by 3 PM Thursday, because I'm scheduled to start my Alice Starmore horse blanket no later than the 16th.

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Re: thwarted!
[info]irihs
2006-10-11 04:47 pm UTC (link)
Fine.

(As long as the blanket is for me. And comes with a horse.)

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Re: thwarted!
[info]ohsochewy
2006-10-11 04:52 pm UTC (link)
no pony for irihs :(

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Re: thwarted!
[info]ornerie
2006-10-11 05:02 pm UTC (link)
bwah hah hah!
this is periodically my desktop at work, depending on how things are going....

:)

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Re: thwarted!
[info]fairy_wench
2006-10-11 09:13 pm UTC (link)
::sniffle:: I've been asking for a pony every year since I was seven. My heart breaks a little more every year I don't get one.

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Re: thwarted!
[info]madeyou_look
2006-10-12 05:31 am UTC (link)
Gratuitous icon post.

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Re: thwarted!
[info]clovecigarettes
2006-10-12 01:13 am UTC (link)
One time I made a cashmere-angora laceweight super advanced sweater for my neighbor's dog and he totally did not appreciate the time and effort I put into it!

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[info]knitting_lady
2006-10-11 05:13 pm UTC (link)
Thank you to the mods for this well-thought-out post!

Also not good: I have half a skein of Flopsy Bunny's Snuggle-riffic Acrylic Silk Substitute Yarn. What do I make with it?

In a possibly-related-but-also-unrelated thought; This comment made me think of all the posts involving people asking for "what do I do with one skein of XXXX yarn?" Would it be possible to add a "one skein" tag to the list of community tags? (unless there's one already, in which case I will duly shame myself...)

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[info]darkenedminds
2006-10-11 06:39 pm UTC (link)
I think the "one skein" tag idea is nice (unless its already in affect! i just haven't noticed).

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[info]wingsrising
2006-10-11 07:33 pm UTC (link)
This sounds like a good idea to me, too. I think most of us have zillions of leftover skeins we haven't a clue what to do with.

Re: your icon: I like it. I've done this, except I put the yarn in a large, flat Rubbermaid container that floats like a little boat for yarn. It keeps your knitting out of the water and keeps curious kitty paws away.

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[info]knitting_lady
2006-10-11 09:45 pm UTC (link)
Really? You've knitted in the bathtub?
The rubbermaid container intrigues me - how do you keep the working yarn from getting dunked in the water, though?

Now I'm considering ditching all other evening plans to try this out.

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[info]wingsrising
2006-10-11 09:55 pm UTC (link)
Well, I can't say the system is always perfect. :-) It works better on smaller WIPs.

The Rubbermaid container is the biggest in a set that I bought years and years ago. It's really absurdly big for food storage unless you want to put a batch of cupcakes in it or something... I'm at work right now so I can't check, but IIRC it's at least 12"-14" in diameter. So you just sort of put the whole thing in the container, float the container (or maybe it ends up resting partially on your stomach) and hold the WIP over it while you knit. If you hold the WIP too far forward of where the container is than the working yarn can get dunked, but if you hold it over the container it's usually fine.

I used the same system to crochet plasic bag tote bags while floating in a floaty chair in my apartment complex's pool this summer, to the amusement of other poolgoers. I've not worked up the nerve to do this with good yarn, though. I figure there's nothing but water in the bathwater if something ends up getting wet, but there's weird chemicals that come in white plastic buckets in the pool

Please tell me I'm not the only person who's ever done this.

Oh, well. I suppose there's no one there to see me except the cats, who already seem to think I'm crazy for voluntarily submerging myself in a tub of water.

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[info]knitting_lady
2006-10-11 11:11 pm UTC (link)
OK, I get the picture of it all, now. I think it's brilliant, and I wish I'd figured that out ages ago ;)

I don't know if you're the only person that knits in the tub but I would be willing to bet large amounts of money that other knitters at least want to. Meanwhile, I'll be on the lookout for dollar store plastic containers....

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[info]thefuryofcocks
2006-10-11 05:52 pm UTC (link)
i would also add that if you are posting something, don't post it as you are running out the door. if there's a problem, you won't be around to fix it. it seems like a number of people have used that excuse lately.

it's easy to fix an lj-cut but damn will you get a flood of cranky emails if you're not around to actually do it.

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[info]tchemgrrl
2006-10-11 05:54 pm UTC (link)
Yes, yes.

In case there's anyone reading this that is disappointed because they were just going to ask a fairly generic question about what to make for people in their family, I'd like to make a suggestion:

Ask them.

Yes, it takes some of the surprise out of it, but 1) There won't be any unpleasant surprises (wool allergy, drastic weight change since you saw them last) 2) No one I've asked has responded by saying "surprise me", 3) There's still the surprise of seeing your excellent handiwork (more so than getting a movie they asked for), and 4) Half the time people forget what they said to you in the first place, and they really will be surprised.

I've found that an email which gives some limits ("smaller than a vest" was mine), gives examples of things you can/would like to knit (Hats? scarves? Ipod cozies?), mentions some advantages of handknitting ("I can make gloves to match that storebought hat you love, or make a hat with a crazy logo on it") and which gives other options ("if you'd rather have a CD, that's really ok."), seems to go over well with everyone. I've had some very specific requests, some surprising ones, and some people would rather have baseball cap.

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[info]ohsochewy
2006-10-11 07:25 pm UTC (link)
Yes, yes, a thousand times yes.

The great part about arts and crafts? Even if you tell someone exactly what they're getting, it'll probably look different than what he or she has imagined, especially if the recipient isn't actually a knitter.

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[info]wingsrising
2006-10-11 07:29 pm UTC (link)
I asked my roommate from college (pregnant with her first baby) what (if anything) I should knit or crochet for a baby present, and they basically said, "Surprise us." :-) I did have her approve the choice of colors and yarn, though. I didn't tell her what I'm making in part because I'm aware it's a little ambitious, and if I don't tell her what it is I can always change my mind and make a crochet ripple afghan with the yarn, with none the wiser.

If you still want to leave it a surprise you could try asking other people who know the recipient what they might like. Helps if the person you're asking gives good gifts themselves, though.

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[info]schizospider
2006-10-11 07:45 pm UTC (link)
4) Half the time people forget what they said to you in the first place, and they really will be surprised.

Especially if you start farther away from the holiday, I'd put that estimate even higher. I've only had a handful of people remember that I was going to knit them something, and it comes as a total surprise when, Christmas morning, they have two pair of socks that fit perfectly and are machine washable and have a design they love (for example).

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[info]sleepsong
2006-10-11 07:35 pm UTC (link)

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[info]neatlittlelass
2006-10-11 08:03 pm UTC (link)
*Cheers* It's all about the signal to noise ratio.

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[info]cookiegirlie
2006-10-11 08:27 pm UTC (link)
Thank you so much.

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[info]hedgemom
2006-10-11 08:27 pm UTC (link)
Only knit gifts for those you know will love them and respect them.

Where were you with this advice 28 years ago?????

Just engaged, I knit my future mother in law a beautiful cable and lace afghan (I've never knit my MOTHER an afghan) for Christmas. I lovingly matched the colors to her furniture when she wasn't home so it would coordinate perfectly. I nearly had to pawn my soul to buy the wool, but I did it for my new "MOM".

The next time we visited I found it in the corner on the floor of the basement underneath the dog. /tmi

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[info]saint_buddha
2006-10-11 08:35 pm UTC (link)
I'm sorry but that would make me cry.

I don't knit for my MIL because everything I do "isn't her bag".

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[info]thefuryofcocks
2006-10-11 08:49 pm UTC (link)
shit. i would've taken it back. and i'm willing to bet she wouldn't have noticed.

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[info]imindiaunajones
2006-10-11 10:08 pm UTC (link)
Oh man, I would have cried like a baby.
Either that, or angrily yanked the afghan out from underneath the dog and stormed out in a fitful rage. Haha.
I appologize for this having happened to you. Man, that really sucks.

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[info]clovecigarettes
2006-10-12 01:18 am UTC (link)
Ohhhuhhhhhhharghhhh. That is awful. Very nice of you to put in that kind of effort, though. Very very extremely thoughtful and nice.

I crocheted my MIL and her twin sister bags (non-identical, I suspect they're sick of getting the same things by now) and they flipped out (with total sincerity) like the bags were the nicest things they ever got ever. "OH! It's LINED! Wow!" /GABYAW.

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[info]more_dragoncelt
2006-10-12 05:11 am UTC (link)
Y'know, that just gets my hackles up. I have heard a woman talk about how her aunt made her a quilt and in her opinion it was the ghastliest thing she'd ever seen and she used it to line the dog kennel. I know the look I gave her was enough to freeze her blood but when she left my sister's house (she was visiting to drop off something) I told my sister that THAT was why I would never knit ANYONE anything bigger than a hat. Really, what's the point? Feh.

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[info]freshgroundfemm
2006-10-12 04:01 pm UTC (link)
oh, that's so sad! I cringed when I read that last part :(

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[info]brightshadowsky
2006-10-12 08:39 pm UTC (link)
It's also nice not to find the sweater you spent so many hours making in the Salvation Army a month later. :/ 'Bout broke my heart.

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[info]azraela
2007-11-15 06:13 pm UTC (link)
Oh my god... That seriously sucks. I would have cried.

I'm only knitting Xmas gifts for my mother and my boyfriend's mother (and possibly my dad) this year -- I realized not everyone appreciates them...

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[info]ohprettywords
2006-10-11 08:34 pm UTC (link)
thank you for this. yay! ♥

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[info]queencallipygos
2006-10-11 08:39 pm UTC (link)
I love you.

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[info]kightp
2006-10-11 09:44 pm UTC (link)
Renewing my membership in the [info]ohsochewy (and by extension, other [info]knitting mods) fan club here. Thanks for all you do to keep this community as useful as it is.

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