knitting: Knitted Items I Can Live Without

Gwen (

gwenkern) wrote in

knitting,
@ 2005-03-28 16:29:00

Knitted Items I Can Live Without
Inspired by the Interweave Knits Summer 2005 Preview, a list of knitting patterns that I never want to see again:

shrugs
capelets
bathing or swimming articles
"footlets" (weren't these once called "socks"?)
felted crap with crap all over it
camisoles that can only be flattering on women with bra sizes in the 34B-36C range
bolero jackets
anything involving fur yarn, real or fake
anything by Mari Lynn Patrick

Please, add your own!

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	kightp 2005-03-28 09:33 pm UTC (link)
	What would you like to see? (Reply to this) (Thread)

	gwenkern 2005-03-28 09:37 pm UTC (link)
	That is a much longer list. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	phillyexpat 2005-03-28 09:33 pm UTC (link)
	If I see one more "freedom poncho," I will SCREAM. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	stacye13 2005-03-28 09:37 pm UTC (link)
	does it come with freedom fries?!?! hahahahahahahaha (sorry, I amuse myself a lot) (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

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pers, 2005-03-28 10:01 pm UTC

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phillyexpat, 2005-03-28 11:43 pm UTC

	lanie_lou 2005-03-28 09:34 pm UTC (link)
	The only thing I have to say about shrugs is try them, you might like them. I thought they were silly until this weekend when I bought a dress that came with one (it was cheap, I didn't really care) and tried it. I think I might love it now. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	gwenkern 2005-03-28 09:39 pm UTC (link)
	Shrugs are cute. I even look okay in them. I just don't see the need for MORE, YET MORE patterns for them. I feel that enough shrug patterns are now extant that anyone who wants to can knit a shrug of any sort without much effort. (Reply to this) (Parent)

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cimorenegal, 2005-03-29 12:33 am UTC

	stacye13 2005-03-28 09:36 pm UTC (link)
	according to trinny & susannah bolero jackets are evil! (plus I think they're kinda weird looking) (Reply to this) (Thread)

	schmoosey 2005-03-28 09:50 pm UTC (link)
	they are evil....and uncomfortable...Boleros that is not Trinny and Susannah (personally I think those two rock) (Reply to this) (Parent)

	kakegoddess 2005-03-28 09:38 pm UTC (link)
	I wouldn't mind a tank that you can wear a bra under :) I liked the camisoles, but can't wear them without some sort of support. I never cared for shrugs, but I guess you can't please everyone all the time. There are some people that really like them. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	mendoza 2005-03-28 09:57 pm UTC (link)
	I'm with you on the tank/bra combo. I love the sleeveless look. I even love the sleeveless and fitted look. But, please! The girls need some support or it's just not appropriate public attire. (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

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phonemonkey, 2005-03-28 10:07 pm UTC

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topacio, 2005-03-28 10:22 pm UTC

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applefaerie, 2005-03-28 10:56 pm UTC

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olliekitty, 2005-03-29 07:40 pm UTC

aymlis
2005-03-28 09:39 pm UTC (link)

I think shrugs and ponchos are ugly, but if people like them, good for them. Also I'm kinda sick of the "cutesy" knitted stuff with pirates and stuff. "Oh look at me I'm so punk rock because I knitted wrist bands that say punk on them". Bah. (Again, if people like that stuff fine, but it gets a little old. And yes I am on

punk_knitters, but only because I like some things people post sometimes).

(Reply to this)

	lynsage 2005-03-28 09:43 pm UTC (link)
	-skull and bones intarsia -any variation on the godforsaken vegan fox -men's sweaters that richard simmons is too butch to wear (Reply to this) (Thread)

	gwenkern 2005-03-28 09:44 pm UTC (link)
	Ooh, good ones! (Reply to this) (Parent)

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fleur, 2005-03-28 09:50 pm UTC

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debit, 2005-03-28 10:40 pm UTC

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technocowboy, 2005-03-28 11:02 pm UTC

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elvenjuicebox, 2005-03-28 11:09 pm UTC

same here! -

zimknits, 2005-03-29 02:42 am UTC

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phonemonkey, 2005-03-28 10:26 pm UTC

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wild_roses, 2005-03-29 01:27 pm UTC

	debit 2005-03-28 09:49 pm UTC (link)
	Any knitted item that completely disregards the fact that knitted fabric will eventually stretch and sag out of shape. Notoriously: -- knitted skirts and dresses -- large knitted bags (remember those bike saddlebags from Vogue?) (Reply to this) (Thread)

	chasingmyself 2005-03-28 10:17 pm UTC (link)
	if only those bike saddlebags would hold up...they were kind of cute. but can you imagine the mess they'd be after a few bike trips? (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

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phonemonkey, 2005-03-28 10:21 pm UTC

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wailon, 2005-03-28 11:28 pm UTC

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xcangel33, 2005-03-29 03:04 am UTC

	fleur 2005-03-28 09:50 pm UTC (link)
	felted crap with crap all over it hahhaahahaha!! :) I could live without any more ponchos, or cute summer tops that have so much shaping in them that it will be Thanksgiving again before I finish. (Reply to this)

dangerbabies
2005-03-28 09:51 pm UTC (link)

"felted crap with crap all over it"

hahahahaahahahahaha

i agree about a lot of this stuff. i like felted bags and all but yeah, as far as paying 7 dollars for a magazine full of patterns on how to make them goes, count me out.

i think shrugs stink. shrugs and bolero jackets (although i like the bolero in the summer 05 preview, so that kind of goes against my agreeing that there are enough patterns already;)).

i like a lot of the patterns, but what the hell! its like an accessories booklet or something. "MORE shrugs, capelets, and weird neck .. things!"

it wouldnt be so bad if more of them were functional, for my life at least. theres no way in hell i have any reason to wear a shrug, ever.

i'm way into that leaf pullover. maybe i will make that and the leaf scarf from vogue knitting and wear them together in woods someplace.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

	island___grrrl 2005-03-28 09:55 pm UTC (link)
	i'm way into that leaf pullover. maybe i will make that and the leaf scarf from vogue knitting and wear them together in woods someplace. tee hee (Reply to this) (Parent)

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phonemonkey, 2005-03-28 10:20 pm UTC

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dangerbabies, 2005-03-28 11:41 pm UTC

	OK, I confess kightp 2005-03-28 09:52 pm UTC (link)
	Every single pattern from the first SnB, and, rapidly, those from the second. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	Re: OK, I confess emmacrew 2005-03-29 08:18 am UTC (link)
	I wuv you (Reply to this) (Parent)

	myheartisglass 2005-03-28 09:53 pm UTC (link)
	Anything with novelty yarns that isn't a scarf. (Reply to this)

	pers 2005-03-28 09:58 pm UTC (link)
	SHAWLS!!!! And for crochet: Anything with granny squares Ripple afgans (Reply to this) (Thread)

	pers 2005-03-28 10:00 pm UTC (link)
	Oh and novelty yarn scarves. Before you go calling yourself a knitter, PLEASE make something that requires at least one increase. (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

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pers, 2005-03-29 04:17 am UTC

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pers, 2005-03-29 04:51 am UTC

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pers, 2005-03-29 05:03 am UTC

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pers, 2005-03-29 04:25 am UTC

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pers, 2005-03-29 04:19 am UTC

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pers, 2005-03-29 04:26 am UTC

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pers, 2005-03-29 04:50 am UTC

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lazychick, 2005-03-29 09:57 am UTC

	lena024 2005-03-28 10:01 pm UTC (link)
	camisoles that can only be flattering on women with bra sizes in the 34B-36C range why?? Camisoles are lovely. And besides most people actually fit into this range. I think its rather average and I dont think people with a larger bra size would wear a camisole. Not everything is made for a certain figure. You have to give and take. (Reply to this) (Thread)

st_raoul
2005-03-28 10:11 pm UTC (link)

And besides most people actually fit into this range

I'd like to take a poll on that. I've NEVER been in that range. I have huge tits, and I frequently wear camisoles, just not out in public where other people can see me. It's hard to find ones that fit decently though.

And even though not everything is made for a "certain figure", you'd think they could put in nice alternatives that will fit across the board. *shrug*

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verminefasciste, 2005-05-13 12:32 am UTC

	crackerbaby 2005-03-28 10:01 pm UTC (link)
	great list - nothing to add. shrugs would be at the top of my list. that's one fashion trend i just can't get into. at all. (Reply to this)

phonemonkey
2005-03-28 10:06 pm UTC (link)

Anything that just HAS to be made in a yarn which consists of 25% pedigree Japanese silkworm silk/25% organic Kyrgystanian vicuna wool/25% Siberian tiger belly fur/25% albino Turkish panda eyebrows, and can only be bought at this one little shop in Macau that is only open on full-moon Tuesdays, and only takes black Amex cards.

Oh, and any garment that fails to take into account the fact that most women wear bras, and most bras have shoulder straps.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

	aymlis 2005-03-28 10:09 pm UTC (link)
	Haha. I'm a new knitter, but I keep getting turned off because of the yarn the patterns use. I'm not good at knowing what to substitute with. Also, I hear ya on the bra strap thing. That seems to be a trend everywhere. It would be one thing if my bra straps were all pretty, but they're not. Comfort over looks. (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

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phonemonkey, 2005-03-28 10:15 pm UTC

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aymlis, 2005-03-28 10:16 pm UTC

ding ding ding! -

veraboat, 2005-03-28 10:11 pm UTC

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keelyerin, 2005-03-29 12:51 am UTC

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katilo, 2005-03-29 02:14 pm UTC

Where to begin?

technocowboy
2005-03-28 10:14 pm UTC (link)

- Ponchos. Can the 60s PLEASE BE DONE!?
- Anatomy. Honestly, that womb creeps the living fsck outta me. I mean, really. Ew.
- Arm warmers. Are they even a real thing, or did someone just get lazy and leave the fingers off of long gloves?
- Ties. As a guy, I'm pretty limited to stuff I can knit and wear myself, but dear hell,knit ties died with the 80s. Please to be keeping them there.
- Fur-esque anything. Yes, I have made some things with eyelash, boa, fuzzy stuff, but aside from the occasional yarn-over, you can't do anything with it. Go ahead. Try a cable. Uh, so no.
- Kureyon. Well, almost ALL of the Noro line. We can keep the Cash Iroha. It feels nice. Same with the Hana Silk. The rest of it? Ew. Feels icky and the colors make my eyes bleed.
- Pastel baby yarns. Granted, this one is something that will always be around, and I suppose this should go on a list of things I'd like to see, but damn, baby cashmerino needs to be in more than just pastels! Try an electic blue or a whore red! I want THOSE colors!

...and yes, I work in a yarn store. :)

(Reply to this) (Thread)

	baby yarn phonemonkey 2005-03-28 10:17 pm UTC (link)
	Apparently babies will look at primary colours rather than pastels if given a choice. (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

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chasingmyself, 2005-03-28 10:22 pm UTC

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phonemonkey, 2005-03-28 10:57 pm UTC

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emmacrew, 2005-03-29 08:24 am UTC

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phonemonkey, 2005-03-29 10:11 am UTC

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emmacrew, 2005-03-29 10:21 am UTC

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onceupon, 2005-03-28 10:18 pm UTC

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technocowboy, 2005-03-28 10:28 pm UTC

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island___grrrl, 2005-03-28 10:31 pm UTC

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messiah_complex, 2005-03-29 02:40 am UTC

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feathered, 2005-03-28 10:47 pm UTC

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phonemonkey, 2005-03-28 10:55 pm UTC

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feathered, 2005-03-28 11:05 pm UTC

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danielavision, 2005-03-28 11:06 pm UTC

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technocowboy, 2005-03-28 11:08 pm UTC

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meggie, 2005-03-28 11:36 pm UTC

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danielavision, 2005-03-29 07:10 am UTC

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emmacrew, 2005-03-29 08:28 am UTC

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evandra, 2005-03-29 06:52 pm UTC

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wickedgood, 2005-03-28 11:34 pm UTC

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katilo, 2005-03-29 02:24 pm UTC

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bigballofyarn, 2005-03-28 11:46 pm UTC

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princesspetunia, 2005-03-29 01:00 am UTC

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ophanim, 2005-03-29 01:46 am UTC

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technocowboy, 2005-03-29 02:02 am UTC

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lonespiritwolf2, 2005-03-29 07:45 pm UTC

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syntheticjesso, 2005-03-29 02:52 am UTC

	kwispysknitting 2005-03-28 10:16 pm UTC (link)
	Granny squares and ponchos. (Reply to this)

	Fun Fur Scarves & Stoles - aack!! beachknitter 2005-03-28 10:17 pm UTC (link)
	No more fun fur scarves. Or those funfur "stoles" with a ribbon in front to make a bow. Stop!!! They look so "le cheeseball". (Reply to this)

	tvini 2005-03-28 10:27 pm UTC (link)
	Googling, Mari Lynn Patrick's stuff doesn't look so bad to me. What do others see about her designs that they dislike? (Reply to this)

phlegmy
2005-03-28 10:28 pm UTC (link)

i'm going to confess right now that i HATE almost every patrern in knitty the articles are great, but most of the patterns are fucking ... ugh. these in particular make me want to scream:
- the nose warmers
- this stupid tie
- THAT GROSS WHITE TRASH BATHING SUIT! WHAT THE HELL?
- these fuzzy weird things
- all their incredibly obnoxious fuzzy scarves
- that green furry skirt. seriously, what the hell?
- http://www.knitty.com/ISSUEfall02/PATThalter.html i don't even have any words for that thing.

also, my boyfriend got me the knitwit book by the knitty editor, and although it was a nice gesture, things like the "freak vest" (a vest made completely out of orange fun fur) made me want to set fire to the book.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

	phonemonkey 2005-03-28 10:35 pm UTC (link)
	I agree that all those patterns are horrid, but I think there are some nice things in Knitty. It's when designers try to be Wacky With Fun Fur that you get the horrors. (Reply to this) (Parent)

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gwenkern, 2005-03-28 10:38 pm UTC

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knittinmol, 2005-03-29 07:18 pm UTC

	geekling 2005-03-28 10:37 pm UTC (link)
	Cozies. Any type of cozies. Your play station don't need a knitted cozy. Niether does your flower pot/coffee mug/table leg/BBQ/md player/screwdriver/whatever. If you so desperatly need a knitted cozy for whatever in 99% of the cases -- You don't need a blimming pattern for it. -- It's either a tube or a square sewn up. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	gwenkern 2005-03-28 10:39 pm UTC (link)
	barbeque cozy! (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

yes! -

irihs, 2005-03-28 10:42 pm UTC

Re: yes! -

phonemonkey, 2005-03-28 10:44 pm UTC

Re: yes! -

stacye13, 2005-03-28 10:46 pm UTC

Re: yes! -

phonemonkey, 2005-03-28 10:51 pm UTC

Re: yes! -

stacye13, 2005-03-29 12:17 am UTC

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irihs, 2005-03-28 10:41 pm UTC

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geekling, 2005-03-28 10:52 pm UTC

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phonemonkey, 2005-03-29 10:33 am UTC

Are you sure yyou dont need a -

zimknits, 2005-03-29 02:52 am UTC

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etinterrapax, 2005-03-29 04:32 am UTC

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petulant, 2005-03-29 11:47 am UTC

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fleur, 2005-03-29 06:07 pm UTC

irihs
2005-03-28 10:38 pm UTC (link)

Other folks can knit whatever the heck they please, in my opinion. I think that most people wearing ponchos look silly, but they probably I look square and unfashionable, so no big whoop. (In fact, I don't mind the occassional poncho pattern in a magazine. But the way IK seems to be going overboard on one fashion-blip theme is bad. Very bad. Even though I'm not a shrug person, I do think the shrug in the Spring issue was cute. Why they needed to put 50 more in the summer issue is beyond me.)

My list of things I never want to knit for myself, and probably don't want to knit, period:
* a poncho (I would consider knitting one for a kid, because some ponchos can look cute on kids. But even this is very unlikely to happen. I'd rather knit them a sweater.)
* anything with fun fur
* anything with most novelty yarns. There are a few that look like they create interesting effects that won't make my eyes bleed, but I'm probably not going to use them, anyway. I usually prefer to use plainer yarns and to knit fun patterns into them.
* knitted pants of any sort. blech.
* most felted items. (Would consider them as gifts, but most felted projects look boring to knit and only marginally less boring to use/wear)
* garter stitch scarves. I didn't like them as a beginner, and I don't like them now. I think that most of them are ugly. I'd rather put in the extra effort to do a seed stitch scarf, if I wanted a plain, non-curling pattern.
* anything that will touch my butt directly. (i.e. no knitted bikinis)
* legwarmers

(Reply to this) (Thread)

	...about garter stitch scarves... phonemonkey 2005-03-28 10:45 pm UTC (link)
	I deliberately refused to do one for a first project because I think garter stitch is ugly. Made one in 2x2 rib instead, which was great because I learned to purl too! (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

Re: ...about garter stitch scarves... -

irihs, 2005-03-28 10:47 pm UTC

Re: ...about garter stitch scarves... -

hangingfire, 2005-03-28 11:04 pm UTC

Re: ...about garter stitch scarves... -

phonemonkey, 2005-03-28 11:04 pm UTC

Re: ...about garter stitch scarves... -

fleur, 2005-03-29 06:11 pm UTC

Re: ...about garter stitch scarves... -

freshgroundfemm, 2005-03-29 12:12 am UTC

(no subject) -

erinleighralph, 2005-03-28 10:47 pm UTC

And I've just noticed a certain synergy between some of your hates: -

phonemonkey, 2005-03-28 11:10 pm UTC

Re: And I've just noticed a certain synergy between some of your hates: -

irihs, 2005-03-28 11:12 pm UTC

Re: And I've just noticed a certain synergy between some of your hates: -

fleur, 2005-03-29 06:13 pm UTC

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emmacrew, 2005-03-29 08:36 am UTC

	debit 2005-03-28 10:44 pm UTC (link)
	I have never seen, and never want to see, a knitted toilet seat cover. And especially not one made out of Fun Fur. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	Toilet seat cover kakegoddess 2005-03-29 01:47 am UTC (link)
	Then I suggest you don't click the link ;) (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

Re: Toilet seat cover -

syntheticjesso, 2005-03-29 02:58 am UTC

Re: Toilet seat cover -

debit, 2005-03-29 03:09 am UTC

Re: Toilet seat cover -

etinterrapax, 2005-03-29 04:36 am UTC

	phonemonkey 2005-03-28 10:46 pm UTC (link)
	Oh, I have another one! (This may be more crochet than knit.) Sushi. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	quaintqueer 2005-03-29 01:57 pm UTC (link)
	I am so there with you on that. Add fruit to that too. OOh, and how about kleenex box covers? (Reply to this) (Parent)

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