I posted my Spander essay today at fall_for_sx. You should check it out.

When you see this, post another Buffy quote in your LJ. Let's see how long this can go on.


OZ: The monkey's the only cookie animal that gets to wear clothes, you know that? You have the sweetest smile I've ever seen. So, I'm wondering, do the other cookie animals feel sorta ripped? Like, is the hippo going, 'Hey, man, where are *my* pants? I have my hippo dignity!' And you know the monkey's just, (with a French accent) 'I mock you with my monkey pants!' And there's a big coup in the zoo.

WILLOW: The monkey is French?

OZ: All monkeys are French. You didn't know that?

I was perusing fics on Nummy Treats yesterday and discovered a couple of fics I'd never encountered before but which I loved ... so I thought I would rec them, in case there are other people who haven't seen them, either.

Melissa's Civilised Conversations -- Spike and Xander go for a walk during the episode "Chosen" and end up getting to know each other better. I love the in-depth portraits of both characters, as well as their interactions. Mostly pre-slash. (Also located here.)

Melissa's And Afterwards Remember -- Post-series. A sequel to "Civilised Conversations." Xander travels backward in time to 1880 for one day to meet William in order to try to help Spike become corporeal again in the present. I find the romance in this one believable and touching. (Also located here.)

I recommend both!

ETA: I also am familiar with (and have rec'd on my rec page) one of Melissa's other fics:

Melissa's Seeing Beyond Imperfections -- While the basic premise -- that Xander is now a seer with regularly scheduled daily visions from the PTB -- is a bit far-fetched, I like this fic anyway. Xander encounters an incorporeal Spike 15 years after the destruction of Sunnydale, and the two become friends before more. (Also located here.)

I didn't initially include this in this post, because it isn't new to me. I read it quite some time ago and liked it enough to rec it ... but these other fics of hers are something I just discovered.

I've finished a third draft of my fall_for_sx essay and I think it is shaping up quite nicely. I'm giving it to margarks and my husband to see if they have further comments, and then I'm going to put it aside for a month or so and look at it again right before it's due to see if there are additional changes I want to make.

I must admit I have some fear that no one will read the essay, as few people seem to be signing up to contribute to the community this year. I know there are lots of people still enthusiastic about the pairing, because I see S/X fic and such linked from bc_updates every few days, but fall_for_sx sign-ups are going very slowly. Of course, I've never kept track of such a thing before, so maybe it's always slow. I worry that everyone has moved on to other fandoms. I'm still a big S/X gal and don't really read fic in other fandoms or with other pairings, so it makes me sad to think people are moving away.

I was hesitant to get involved with fall_for_sx, because I haven't been able to write anything in so long. Total writer's block. But I decided that I could write an essay and it wouldn't be as hard as writing fic. So that's what I'm doing.

If you want to sign up (come on! join us!), go to the sign-up page here. Sign ups are going on through September 21.

I've been reading a lot of Spike/Xander fic these past few weeks. I didn't read any for quite a while -- several months, I think, during which time I was reading my het pairings in other fandoms -- and it was odd when I got back to it. I had a brief adjustment period during which slash felt really ludicrous -- right! like they would do that! -- before I subsided back to the requisite amount of suspension of disbelief. It all seems normal again to me now.

During this most recent bout of reading, I've been realizing how picky I am about fic. I look for specific plot elements and if none of my kinks are included then the fic just leaves me cold.

My kinks
miscommunication re: feelings
amnesia
unrequited love/pining
h/c (preferably emotional h/c)
somebody thinking they're being used
loss of control

Knowing what I like, I wish I could write it. I've been suffering months of writer's block, though. I can't write anything at all, and it's very frustrating. I'm glad I don't have any WIPs sitting out there, making me feel guilty. I wish I could make my brain work again, but it isn't happening. Annoying!

I wish bc_updates mentioned when someone posted the last chapter of a fic, somehow marking the fic as completed. I would find that extremely useful. I've been reading a lot of fic lately, but I much prefer to wait until a story is completed if I can. bc_updates isn't terribly useful to me, as a result.

I recently posted on bloodclaim asking for fic recs, but realized belatedly that I should say something here, too. So what good stuff has been written in the last year or so? I don't like vamp!Xander or all-human AUs, but I'm open to all other suggestions. Please? Feed me?

My writer's block continues, but at least I've been reading some fic. Just re-reading old favorites. Noticing a lot of old WIPs that will most likely never be finished -- such as jackson_rayne's Male Bonding and the never-published sequel to shadowscast's London Calling -- which makes me sad. I guess I should be grateful that at least I finished the fics I was working on before I hit a brick wall. I would hate to have WIPs out there.

I went to read witling's Prawnverse, but found that she has friends-locked her entire journal, including all of her fic. Damn! Once upon a time, I started to download that story onto my own computer, just because I love it so much and worried that it might someday disappear, but I seem to have stopped after only the first two parts (out of twenty-one). Does anyone else happen to have the Prawnverse stashed somewhere? If I could get it from you, I would love you forever.

I must admit that I don't understand why someone would friends-lock all their fic. Maybe someone in real life found her journal. Sigh. We all suffer.

Does anyone know what happened to Wisteria? I was looking for her fic Hard Candy (with anniesj), and I found that her website has disappeared. I can't seem to find her on LJ, either. Now I'm concerned.

I've been reading fic in the Queer As Folk fandom the past couple of days, and it's really different from Spander fic. The fans and the fics are much more focused on individual episodes, writing their fics specifically following and referencing actual episodes of the series. In a way it makes sense, because on QAF the characters are actually canonically together, so there's no need to write fic that exists independent of episodes and takes place during vague times like "Season 4 sometime when Spike lived in the basement," even though that's what I would prefer (probably because I'm used to it).

I find QAF fic somehow less creative. It's not just because of the lack of supernatural elements, though there's some of that, too. It's more like Spander writers have to be creative to figure out ways to get the boys together, whereas QAF writers don't have that challenge. It makes for less interesting plots, in my opinion. It makes for stories that are very similar to what's seen on the show, rather than something really new and different.

Also, the fans (and writers) seem to have memorized the episode numbers and content of the entire series, referring to them in their comments on fics and in authors' notes, which is intimidating and confusing for the new fan. I've rarely seen that in Buffy/AtS fandom, except for post-NFA or post-The Gift fics, and those (and the occasional other fic related to a particular episode) are referred to by name -- such as "The Replacement" or "The Pack" -- instead of number. I think it's a rare Buffy fan who has memorized the episode numbers of the entire series. Some of my discomfort here, however, may be due to my greater familiarity with the Buffyverse. I've watched all the episodes of QAF, but I haven't memorized their content, especially because the episodes are more similar to each other than Buffy episodes are. Buffy episodes are easily distinguishable from each other because of the monster of the week. It's easy to remember the episode with the fishy swim team, or the episode with the hyena, or the episode when they got trapped in the house with the tiny fear demon, or the episode with the first slayer in their dreams. The episodes are really different from each other (except the final three seasons, which aren't quite as distinct, in my opinion, especially Season 7). Most Spander writers tend to give context through description, rather than episode name or number.

I think I'll be going back to Spander fics soon, because I just like them more. I sometimes get obsessed with something new for a while, but I always seem to come back to Spike and Xander. They're my OTP.

Can anyone rec me some good QAF Brian/Justin fic? My kinks are h/c, amnesia, and angst with a happy ending, but I'm willing to check out other good stuff, too (as long as it doesn't end unhappily and isn't a WIP). I've never read anything in the QAF fandom, so I'm starting from scratch.

I've been thoroughly corrupted. I was reading a fic this afternoon which started off with a bunch of Xander/Buffy. Lots of explicit X/B sex. Now, once upon a time, I wrote S/B fic. I was all about the het. But now I'm so thoroughly corrupted that I read through the second or third X/B sex scene and decided that I couldn't deal. There are no pussies in my fic! What's the deal with the pussies? Only cocks. Cocks all day long!

Like I said: corrupted.

Title: Sight and Sound
Author: kimberly_a
Rating: PG-13
Author's Notes: Again I thank yourlibrarian, savoytruffle, and margarks for their help.

To remind you: This is set in an amorphous part of Season 7. Spike is souled. The chip has been taken out. The trigger has been dealt with. The roadtrip with Andrew didn't happen. Willow has already seen The First as Cassie, Dawn has seen Joyce, The First has shown up as the Potential Chloe, etc.

This chapter is about twice the length of the others. I probably should have broken it into two, but it still isn't terribly long.


Previous entries are here.

( Sight and Sound, Part 3/3 )

Title: Sight and Sound
Author: kimberly_a
Rating: PG-13
Author's Notes: Again I thank yourlibrarian, savoytruffle, and margarks for their help.

Previous part is here.

To remind you: This is set in an amorphous part of Season 7. Spike is souled. The chip has been taken out. The trigger has been dealt with. The roadtrip with Andrew didn't happen. Willow has already seen The First as Cassie, Dawn has seen Joyce, The First has shown up as the Potential Chloe, etc.

(I always wanted Giles to be visited by The First as Jenny Calendar. If I could write Giles, maybe I would write that fic. But, alas, I cannot. Anybody else want to write it? Has someone already done it? Probably.)

( Sight and Sound, Part 2/3 )

Continued here.

I plan to post the last part tomorrow if possible. Possibly the next day, at the latest.

I feel so weird about the name of this community. When I first created it, I chose the name because it was *my* fandom stuff. *I* am the fan. But I realized belatedly that it sounds like it's referring to fans of Kimberly, which makes me very uncomfortable. Maybe I should change the name.

Okay. I'm trying to get back to writing. So here goes. Please be gentle.

Title: Sight and Sound
Author: kimberly_a
Rating: PG-13
Author's Notes: A big thank you, first of all, to yourlibrarian for the idea. I was completely stuck and couldn't have written a thing without her input. Thank you also to savoytruffle and margarks for their very kind beta work. I've never worked with a beta before, but I found it very helpful this time around.

This is set in an amorphous part of Season 7. Spike is souled. The chip has been taken out. The trigger has been dealt with. The roadtrip with Andrew didn't happen. Willow has already seen The First as Cassie. I think I may plagiarize myself a bit, but such is life.

( Part 1/3 )

* * *

Continued here.

Don't forget about the White Knight Awards. There's still time to vote. And even if you don't feel like voting, check out the nominees for a list of fics to read. (No, I'm not posting this reminder just because I'm nominated, but that *is* how the awards were called to my attention.) Oh, and someone nominated "It's Just a Jump to the Left" at the Shades of Grey Awards, too! Thank you, oh mysterious person!

Thank you also to everyone who rec'd fic when I asked! I was overwhelmed by the response and have been voraciously reading ever since. In the spirit of rec'ing fic, I thought I'd list some of my favorites from my reading binge of the past few days. (My god, there are a lot of long-neglected WIPs out there! I avoid them like the plague, because they leave me wanting in unpleasant ways.) I've read a lot and been a very bad girl, hardly giving any feedback at all. I'm terrible about that, even though I desperately crave feedback on my own fics. I deserve a spanking. Preferably from Spike.

Everyone else has probably read these fics before, but I thought I'd post about them just in case anyone out there was interested. Anyway, here are some of my favorite fics I've read this week:

eliade's The One in the Cave -- One of those "Xander and Spike have to get jiggy to save themselves from evil demons" fics, but fabulous. Almost entirely PWP, but there are some nice emotions involved, too.

Kyrieane's Reparations -- A short h/c fic set in Season 6, with Xander comforting Spike about Buffy's callous treatment of him.

ladycat777's Half-Windsor -- Xander is surprised when Spike insinuates himself into being Xander's date for a work function, then manages to actually become date-like. This non-smutty fic is nevertheless one of my new favorites.

mahaliem's Amnesia!Spike -- I love a good amnesia story, and this one is funny funny funny. I'm tempted to quote some of the funny, but there's just too much of it. I can't choose just one bit. The S/X in this one is minor, but it's still definitely worth a read.

reremouse's 28th Day Itch!Verse -- The author describes this as "a smutty story of compulsion and isolation." Seasons 2-3, Xander has a hyena problem that results in him desperately craving a ruthlessly un-chipped Spike. This has good characterization and a nice Xander POV. I have a bit of a fondness for Hyena!Xander fics, like ladycat's Hunt-Brother and janedavitt's Predatory Acts (and its sequel, Preying on my Mind).

shadowscast's How the Light Gets In -- Post-NFA Xander finds Spike living with Illyria in L.A. and tries to convince him to come work with the Council. Great characterization (including Illyria) and a nicely developed relationship between the two boys. I'd read this one before, but found that I liked it even better on second reading.

tabaqui's As If We Should Forget We Have No Hands -- Lovely post-NFA fic in which Xander loses his memory while doing Council work in Vietnam and is rescued and reluctantly cared for by souled Spike. The dialogue and characterizations are great, as is the tension between the two characters. I really like the way of approaching Xander's amnesia. It feels more realistic than most.

tgray's Impersonating Spike -- A short, smutty, eventually funny fic that I will definitely read repeatedly.


I've added them all to my page of recs. Now I'm going to start re-reading Quantum Xander to see if I like it better now that it's finished. It hooked me at the start, but lost me part-way through. I'm hoping that it gets good again.

I hope to start writing again soon. Well, I've written a little bit, but not enough to post. Or yes, enough to post the first bit, but it needs tweaking first. Anyone want to beta for me? I could use an objective eye to tell me where I'm going wrong. Nicely. Tell me nicely, that is. I'm a bit sensitive about such things. I'm looking for advice rather than criticism.

It seems like very few people are interested in Spike/Xander anymore, having moved on to other fandoms, but I'm still here. I hope some other people are, too. Is there anyone out there?

I haven't read any fanfic in ages, but I'm reading now (which is what has inspired me to write again). Does anyone have any recommendations of good stuff I've missed?

I'm going to try writing some more S/X fic. No promises that I'll make any of it public if it's terrible, but I'm finally ready to try again after the disaster that was "Through the Looking Glass."

Problem is: no inspiration. So I need help. Ideas. Bare-bones plot ideas, stuff like "they see each other after a long separation" or "unrequited love." I've already written all my very favorites (amnesia and unrequited love, in particular), so I'm looking for some new ones. Sort of like a challenge fic except less formal and I'll just pick the idea that calls to me.

Help? What are you wanting to read?

"It's Just A Jump to the Left" has been nominated (by some kind person) in the White Knight Awards for Best Characterization. Thank you, whoever nominated me!

I also just wanted to say hi to everyone. Hi, everyone!

Adorable Xmas card from trepkos in the mail today. Thank you!

Hope you're all having a good holiday season. :-)

(I tried to post this before, but it didn't take. I hope it doesn't post twice now!)