hayy (: im Nat,
Im not sure if anyone still posts on here but it looked like such a supportive community I thaught I would join anywayy :P
Nichole is amazing thinsporation! I absolutly love her :D
Im new to here but not new to having an ED, I had bullimia for 10 months and ive had EDnos for about a year
xxxx <3

I own the community "Alcorexic" and tomorrow we are hosting a power-hour at 7 pm your time.
You take the shot of your choice, every minute for an hour your time.
The fun is that it's a drunk, empty-stomache party on livejournal. We can chat about anything.
No inhibitians. PLEASE JOIN US.
Hope to see you on livejournal. I'm also at www.myspace.com/epitome_ofadoll.com.
Tomorrow night will be a PARTAY of a bunch of skinnay bitches! RSVP!!!!

Hey Ladies! this site has some GREAT thinspo tips! go check it out!
Good Luck, think thin!
Love you girls!
<3Kat
www.geocities.com/genevieve5566/proanabesttip.html

whatever happened to the challenges? i miss them, i really want to start another one, especially because bathing suits are impending upon us.

would anyone else be interested? feedback? suggestions?

and just so it isn't text only....

well im james...but yes im a girl...

i am here becuase i love this site and nicole and the community leader...syd...is very sweet and motivating..


i love thinspo pictures of mary-kate..i love her lover her clothes and her weight especially in the 04-05 era...but also nicole and very thin real girls who motivate me..sorry i cant post pictures..i totally forgot how to put it under the cut...so let me know and i will...i love syd's thinspo pictures...love jeans as well for thinspo...very skinny legs in jeans

it very early in feb so ill list my weight and goals for this month:


5'2
HW: 120
CW: 99
LW: 93

goals:
feb.14 (valentines): 95 or less
end of feb: 93...lets get motivated

i feel fat as hell....even though im down to 100 (im 5'2) i feel so fat and i have to ...HAVE TO lose these 10 pounds...ive been kinda cranky lately and i almost told my boyfriend i have an eating disorder...has anyone else told...how does it affect you and them ...even if its just your friends youve told...bc i feel like if i told and then ever again asked for food or denied it it would bite me in the ass

nicole richie (and christina aguilera) both went into labor today!

nicole had a healthy, 6 lb, 7 oz baby girl named Harlow Winter Kate Madden. they've already left cedars' sinai hospital.

wow, i haven't written in any communities in months.

i didn't eat yesterday, not really to make up for thanksgiving, but more because i'm pissed off because my boyfriend's family is fucked up and ruined my thanksgiving. you can read about it in my journal if you want.

i'm SO pissed that i refuse to eat until i'm A) 99 pounds, B) dead or in the hospital, or C) not a bad person and finally good enough for everyone else and myself. i haven't eaten since probably 9:00 at night friday (it's sunday now). i'm not talking to my boyfriend, but i physically can't cry because i don't feel anything right now. when i'm fasting i feel like a fog engulfs me and dims the rest of the world.

if any of you remember me from when i used to post all the time..i kind of stopped working out for a while, but i've been working out pretty much every single day since this summer. i can tell i'm increasing my lean body mass and my body is changing. for example, my spandex pants are actually loose around the waist. as i'm building muscle i'm losing fat, and muscle takes up less space so i'm pretty sure my measurements are decreasing. on a typical day i do 45-50 minutes of cardio, sometimes 60 minutes, lots of crunches, and some legwork and pushups to tone my arms. i also do yoga once or twice a week. i'm starting to get abs, which i never thought would happen. i'm even starting to get that "V" in your lower belly!! it's so exciting. my gym has been closed for FOUR DAYS (the better part of a week) for thanksgiving. if you ask me that's ridiculous because it's such a gluttonous holiday and they should encourage increasing physical activity while everyone is overeating but... tomorrow it reopens and i'm soooo excited to get back on the treadmill. it's going to feel amazing. everything just...makes sense when i'm at the gym.

anyway, so...that's my status in case anybody was wondering where i am!
oh, by the way, this morning i found two songs that are pretty thinspirational-- "lemon" by katy rose and "a better son/daughter" by rilo kiley.

here's your thinspo, it's jenna jameson and i'm usually not into big boobs but i like her stomach:
( Read more... )

yesterday, i didn't eat anything. that was actually really surprising.

and i think because i'm not eating enough, i'm becoming really dumb. clumsy. confused. and forgetful. which reminds me of my old self. which reminds me of thin. which = good.

but, for some odd reason i was worried about driving this morning, even though it wasn't like i had fasted for a week or anything [which has been the reason for not driving in the past for me]. i was just really anxious. so i ended my unnoticed fast with a no sugar added creamscicle pop. i don't know why i chose to eat that of all things.

my mind has a mind of its own. that doesn't make any sense.
i guess it doesn't help that i've got lots of studying to do.

how're all YOU doing, ladies???

c'mon GIRLY FACES! let's get active!
see it as inspiration that i am getting back in the daily-post game. it's been so long since i've been motivated like this; wouldn't everyone want to partake?

think: geez louise, she has soooo much weight to lose. she just had a baby, and here i am, inactive in the community.

not only talking about my progress/setbacks/ideas/goals helps me stay focused, but also hearing everyone else talk about their days.

i really turn to this community sometimes. i don't talk to anyone else about my problems with weight. although my whole family knows, they don't understand. you guys do. and you know it. it's nice to be able to talk about how often we weight ourselves [morning, before we pee, afterwards, before binges, before purges, before and after fasts, etc.etc.] how meticulous we can be with calorie counting, how "why don't you just eat six small meals a day?" doesn't cure us.

i think EVERYONE can benefit from making posts more often. from writing them and reading them.

( yesterday )

seriously everyone - how are you doing? what's going on???

last weekish i was wondering if i had the power to restrict again. if i could do it. ever since having emeri, i've been toying with my disorder and it hadn't taken root as easily and quickly as it used to. i weighed myself friday morning and was 134. and i binged all weekend long. it was terrible. i didn't weigh my self, but i assumed i was at least 137. i ate under 500 calories on monday. under 600 on tuesday. i also took laxitives on tuesday because i hadn't gone in a while.

i weighed myself this morning and i was 131. it was extremely exhillerating. it feels good because I CAN do this again.

last night i made a cake and couldn't stop licking off the mix from my index finger. i thought that if i was really hungry or bored-eating than i should have something healthy, so i began to eat an apple and got really bored with it. that was PHENOMENAL to me. the one time i went a WEEK without eating, i remember just being BORED with eating. chewing was boring. swallowing was boring. it was like an option instead of a necessity and i chose not to partake in the event: eating.
it felt great to feel like that again.

i've come to the realization that:
- i have the power to do anything, if i really really wanted it.
- i don't have the power to get over this. i was hospitalized, in therapy, in an out-patient program, went to group meetings, had a baby, and i'm still here. and that's actually really sad.

but i find it more pathetic to not have control.
is that sick or what?

Jillian Michaels:
Personal Trainer and Fitness Coach
Seen on: "The Biggest Loser"

Getting Back on the Wagon

It happens — you miss a few workouts and you feel like your weight-loss plan is totally derailed. It's tempting to mentally slap yourself around, right? Before you start, I want you to remind yourself of something. Being hard on yourself is the Old You.

The New You knows how to deal with setbacks and get back on the wagon. And after all, there are no mistakes, just learning experiences.

Weight loss is a process — it takes time. You will encounter small failures — everyone does — but every pound you gain can be lost.

And if you miss a workout, it's not the end of the world! Get to the gym the next day and continue to focus on your short-term goals. Just because you made bad choices today doesn't mean you can't start over tomorrow. New day? New beginning. And don't you forget it.

-Jillian Michaels


i recieved this inspiring message in my inbox this morning. I subscribe to Jillian's Daily mailing list. It's full of tips and exersises and inspirational quotes. You can sign up to her free mailing list if you're interested at: www.JillianMichaels.com

x-posted to my personal LJ. Add me if you want :)

has anyone ever heard that grapes have a laxative effect?

wellll, i fasted for 24 hours and then had a cup of coffee and a little while later some red grapes... without getting into any detail, i am now fairly sure they do have a laxative effect. (and no, it wasn't the coffee- i drink coffee every morning and i had the coffee way before the grapes).

if you type in "eating disorder documentary" into youtube, there are two documentaries on there that i haven't seen before, in case anyone's interested. one is called remembering lena zavaroni, and the other is called caraline's story. just to warn you, caraline's story is really, really fucking depressing.

today i weighed myself and the scale was torn between 110 and 111, which fucking sucks. i thought it would at least be 109 or 108. it probably will be tomorrow if i continue the way things are going...i did really well yesterday and really well so far today :)

hope everyone's having a great day!
here's your thinspo:
( Read more... )

i am sooo fucking depressed and i don't really know why.

i haven't written in any communities in sooo long.

today my boss left me 1/2 of a whole wheat wrap with turkey. i ate it, and then threw it up. it's weird because i never really purge... but it was so early on in the day and i was so upset that i ate without really NEEDING to eat. for some reason afterwards i was so shaky and i was having heart palpitations. i don't really know why seeing as i purge like twice a year, but that's never happened before.

i had a few hershey's kisses after that (ugh), and that's all i'll have today.

yesterday i went to the gym... walked a mile uphill, did a little over 100 crunches. it made me feel a little bit better about myself. but ugh, i am still so mother fucking depressed. i wish i could go to the gym right now and sweat out my stress but they're closed on the weekends in the summer :(

i feel like my boyfriend has been distant, but i could just be imagining it. it's really true what they say about how you can't be in love with someone else until you love yourself.

here's your thinspo:
( Read more... )

i hope this works

hey everyone im new here.
height: 5'7
cw: 110
lw: 87
hw:122
goal: 100
eating disorder for 4 years

Day 4 (actually posting on time woo hoo!
food under 700cals = 2p
pills/vits = 1p
1 hour exercise = 2p
water consumption = 1p
pictures under cut = 1p

( pretty pretty )
hope you're all doing well my lovelies!

<3 mirabella