hd_holidays: Happy H/D Holidays, malachic!

hd_hols (

hd_hols) wrote in

hd_holidays,
@ 2007-12-24 14:38:00

Entry tags:

fic, long/chaptered fic, post-dh, post-war, rated: nc-17, winter 2007 round

Happy H/D Holidays, malachic!
Author: rurounihime
Recipient: malachic
Title: Vale Sanare
Pairing(s): H/D, H/OMC, D/OMC, past H/G
Summary: Draco’s world gains a new component, just when he thought he’d sorted everything out.
Rating: NC-17
Disclaimer: All Harry Potter characters herein are the property of J.K. Rowling and Bloomsbury/Scholastic. No copyright infringement is intended. All characters over 18 years of age.
Warning(s): seizures, war injuries, angst, me being mean to H and D.
Deathly Hallows compliant? EWE
Word Count: 23,327
Author's Notes: Thank you SO MUCH to my wonderful betas who were willing to help right up until zero hour. Thanks to A for her invaluable information on the effects of seizures. References: www.epilepsy.com, http://www.archives.nd.edu/cgi-bin/words.exe, and wikipedia.org. To malachic: I hope you enjoy the story! Happy holidays!

Title: from “valens,” meaning “strong; vigorous/healthy/robust,” and “sanare,” meaning “lesser cure, heal; correct; quiet.”

( Vale Sanare )

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(Post a new comment)

	kittie8571 2007-12-24 09:05 pm UTC (link)
	My heart broke for both of them while reading this lovely story. Wonderfully well-written and I adore the ending. Happily ever after, which is the way we like 'em. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	rurounihime 2008-01-08 09:03 pm UTC (link)
	Haha, I agree: happily ever after should be the way of things. ^__^ Thank you for reading my fic! (Reply to this) (Parent)

	ruffians 2007-12-24 09:15 pm UTC (link)
	the first description of draco's seizure had me grimacing in my seat. beautifully written and a wonderful story. you really did your research! (Reply to this) (Thread)

	lusiology 2007-12-27 10:19 am UTC (link)
	love the icon! (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) -

rurounihime, 2008-01-08 09:06 pm UTC

(no subject) -

rurounihime, 2008-01-08 09:05 pm UTC

	josephides 2007-12-24 10:01 pm UTC (link)
	Awesome. Really enjoyed this. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	rurounihime 2008-01-08 09:06 pm UTC (link)
	Thank you so much for reading my fic and for commenting. ^__^ (Reply to this) (Parent)

	mahaliem 2007-12-24 11:40 pm UTC (link)
	This was lovely. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	rurounihime 2008-01-08 09:06 pm UTC (link)
	Thank you so much! (Reply to this) (Parent)

	ivybelle 2007-12-24 11:42 pm UTC (link)
	This story touched my heart. Your understanding of epilepsy has been so intimately interwoven with your characterisation of Draco - a remarkable achievement. The growing relationship, especially the pain of revealing the whole of oneself to another, was also beautifully depicted. I fell deeply and utterly into your story, and loved it totally. (Reply to this) (Thread)

rurounihime
2008-01-08 09:08 pm UTC (link)

Your understanding of epilepsy has been so intimately interwoven with your characterisation of Draco - a remarkable achievement.

Wow, thank you for such an outstanding comment. I wish I could say that I truly understand epilepsy, but there are so many things about it I don't know. I am very grateful to one of my betas for the fact that she gave me such detailed info on the condition. It was a big help.

Thanks so much for reading my fic!

(Reply to this) (Parent)

	acromantular 2007-12-25 12:34 am UTC (link)
	Beautiful and intense. Using Draco's POV throughout gave it remarkable power- it was wonderful to see him open up over the course of the story. Thank you for a clear, happy ending as well. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	rurounihime 2008-01-08 09:10 pm UTC (link)
	Thank you very much! I'm so excited that you liked the story. It was very intriguing to write and explore the subject. I'm just relieved it turned out the way it did. I appreciate your comments! (Reply to this) (Parent)

sesheta_66
2007-12-25 12:35 am UTC (link)

Guh! What a loving, profound, and deeply moving story. The angst, the pain, the constant reminder of the war ... all heart wrenching. But the patience, devotion and empathy Harry showed were heart warming. It was a long and gradual process, and I like that neither of them becomes 'cured' but that they do whatever they can to cope, and to ease the intensity and after-effects.

Beautiful, gorgeous story. Loved it.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

rurounihime
2008-01-08 09:11 pm UTC (link)

I like that neither of them becomes 'cured' but that they do whatever they can to cope, and to ease the intensity and after-effects.

I'm not a big fan of cure-all storylines... I just don't think they reflect reality most of the time. But that doesn't mean that reality can't be enjoyable. Thank you so much for leaving me such a nice comment. I'm so glad you liked the fic.

(Reply to this) (Parent)

	malachic 2007-12-25 01:18 am UTC (link)
	... Wow. That's beautiful. It poked and prodded at my heart, and it was... wow. is still in shock It's beautifully done, with enough detial and enough care to be absolutely heart rending... Mystery Author, whoever you are, I think I love you. In the platonic, non-creepy way. g (Reply to this) (Thread)

	rurounihime 2008-01-08 09:13 pm UTC (link)
	Haha, this is probably the third time I've told you this, but thank you so much for your reception of my fic. I really am relieved you liked it! I know it wasn't exactly what you requested... I'm sorry for that. But it's really great to be loved in a platonic, non-creepy way. laughs Thank you again for all your feedback on this story. (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) -

malachic, 2008-01-10 12:11 am UTC

(no subject) -

rurounihime, 2008-04-02 01:52 am UTC

	wow (Anonymous) 2007-12-25 03:06 am UTC (link)
	I mean, wow. This is incredibly good. Not just the physical, but the emotions and the thoughts. Very visceral, very evocative and just wow. I read a lot of fic in different fandoms and this is one of the best. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	Re: wow rurounihime 2008-01-08 09:14 pm UTC (link)
	I hope you get to see this, and fear you won't because it has been so long since you commented. But I wanted to say thank you very much for reading my fic and then for leaving me such nice feedback on it. Visceral, evocative... Those words are really a treat to see in response to something I've written. (Reply to this) (Parent)

acidic_lipstick
2007-12-25 03:56 am UTC (link)

oh wow. This totally utterly without a doubt swept me away. Its just so beautiful and poignant and has this eerie grace to it. you have a wonderful way with words mystery writer you. I really didn't think I'd read it- or like it! I mean, seizures, war injuries, etc. all speak of illness and darkness and I like my D/H just shy of vanilla (with a spritz of angst) but wow this was just magnificently written. lovely, slow pacing and backstory. I'm curious as to who are the two loves Harry lost! I mean besides Ginny.

“You’ve won,” he croaks, and then doesn’t know why. His own voice startles him in the quiet bedroom. Surely someone should hear it, his last concession. It is important, and yet no one will ever know he spoke the words. That he gave up. Draco feels like sobbing, pouring out his body’s grief in tears down his cheeks. He shakes with it, a gentle, helpless jolting of his shoulders.

The one that has finally been chased away shouldn’t be different from the others. But he is. Oh gods, he is.

Harry is always different.
Oh my word I welled up in tears during this bit. My heart ached for poor Draco.

But what a splendid ending♥ they're not perfect and they're still just a bit broken but in a beautiful way that lets them fit together so quaintly♥

(Reply to this) (Thread)

rurounihime
2008-01-08 09:20 pm UTC (link)

I like my D/H just shy of vanilla (with a spritz of angst)

Haha, I'm a fan of happy endings myself. Something to agonize over for a bit, but ultimately good feelings. ^__^

I'm curious as to who are the two loves Harry lost! I mean besides Ginny.

Ginny is actually one of them, but her loss had a lot to do with their inherent relationship as well as Harry's illness. Ginny helped him for years, I think, but they grew apart romantically (mostly because Harry was still finding himself and realizing he wasn't quite as straight as he'd thought), and so the break up, when it came, was particularly painful because of all the concern and emotional attachment and debt they had for each other. Spending a lot of time and effort on someone who ends up falling out of love with you... I can imagine Ginny has some bitterness. Oh, but the other person was a guy. I'm not sure when or where the relationship took place, but it did go on for at least a month, maybe more, and when Harry revealed his true physical state, his lover was less than understanding about the enormity of it. :(

Thank you so much for such a great response to my story, and for liking it so much! I really appreciate what you've said here.

(Reply to this) (Parent)

	blonde_cecile 2007-12-25 04:37 am UTC (link)
	Excellent fic. I enjoyed every word of it. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	rurounihime 2008-01-08 09:21 pm UTC (link)
	Thank you very much! ^__^ (Reply to this) (Parent)

	otakuangel 2007-12-25 05:23 am UTC (link)
	Sheer brilliance. Anything I could say would simply cheapen what you have achieved. Thank you so very much for sharing. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	rurounihime 2008-01-08 09:21 pm UTC (link)
	Thank you so much for such a nice comment! I really appreciate it, and I'm so happy you liked the story. ^_^ (Reply to this) (Parent)

	oboros 2007-12-25 06:27 am UTC (link)
	what an excellent telling of despair and finding beauty. very well done. thank you so much for sharing! (Reply to this) (Thread)

	rurounihime 2008-01-08 09:22 pm UTC (link)
	Thank you for sharing your thoughts about my story with me! It's so nice to read your comment. ^__^ (Reply to this) (Parent)

grey_hunter
2007-12-25 09:45 am UTC (link)

Loved it, although I, thankfully, have no such experiences, the description of both Draco's and Harry's ailments felt very real to me. I loved the Harry you've created; usually I am disinclined to believe in the existence of such worldly and wise Harrys with tanned skin and various pieces of jewelery, but yours blended seamlessly into the Harry JKR left before the epilogue. I could even believe that he died - if not his soul but his body did (which was an interesting discussion topic recently on my f-list, whether Harry died or not, but I believe you read it too). Of course, I knew that Harry wouldn't turn away from Draco after witnessing his plight because this is Harry! but I was still captivated by Draco's fears (thank you that they only lasted that long, I know you could have made him a lot more miserable if you wanted). I loved the ending, it was interesting that a 'simple' regular schedule and a change of diet would render Draco's illness controllable, but that's how things seem to work in the magical world (with potions needing an exact count of stirs and such). I was a bit worried for Harry; I didn't think his shaking would become better with time, only worsen, but it seems I was wrong with my predictions. :) Btw, I know this isn't a humour fic, but for some reason, I was waiting for a scene in which Harry and Draco have sex and it triggers Draco's seizures and Draco has forgotten to put up his anti-mother wards and Narcissa runs to help and finds them in flagrante. :D A very interesting and captivating read, thank you for sharing.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

rurounihime
2008-01-08 09:35 pm UTC (link)

I, thankfully, have no such experiences

Me neither, thank goodness.

usually I am disinclined to believe in the existence of such worldly and wise Harrys with tanned skin and various pieces of jewelery, but yours blended seamlessly into the Harry JKR left before the epilogue.

Heh, this Harry was a new one for me, too. I don't usually write him this way, and I thought I would give it a shot, see if I couldn't come to terms with this type of portrayal of him. I usually raise my eyebrows at this kind of thing, too. ^_^ But I'm so relieved you think he fits with JKR's Harry. One of the things I loved about book seven was seeing him TRULY mature. It was a real treat for me and I love being able to write post-seven fic with him as an adult because of it.

I could even believe that he died - if not his soul but his body did (which was an interesting discussion topic recently on my f-list, whether Harry died or not, but I believe you read it too).

You know, another person commented on this subject, and I had to blink because I read that part in the seventh book as Harry's death. Literally. There was deep, deep magic at work there, but I decided that the rules of Horcruxes determined that the "host" would have to die for the piece of soul inside to truly perish. Therefore I was surprised to read that one of my readers didn't believe that him dying was realistic (I guess I was just so convinced myself). So even if just a part of Harry died, it was a death, because otherwise the Voldy-soul would still have something to hang onto afterwards. Just my thoughts on the matter. And I actually didn't get a chance to read your discussion, so I will definitely be heading over to check it out!

it was interesting that a 'simple' regular schedule and a change of diet would render Draco's illness controllable

I picture them having to go through a lot of trial and error over the years, building up a routine and finding combinations of activities and diet that would help Draco's malady become a little more manageable. It definitely wouldn't happen overnight. But I think that every little bit helps to make things easier once they figure out what works.

I was waiting for a scene in which Harry and Draco have sex and it triggers Draco's seizures and Draco has forgotten to put up his anti-mother wards and Narcissa runs to help and finds them in flagrante.

Oh my, now I SO want to write that! *laughs heartily* That would be fabulous! Because you know it would happen at some point!

Thank you so much for such a wonderful review!

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) -

grey_hunter, 2008-01-08 10:20 pm UTC

(no subject) -

rurounihime, 2008-04-02 01:55 am UTC

(no subject) -

grey_hunter, 2008-04-02 09:00 am UTC

(no subject) -

grey_hunter, 2008-04-02 09:12 am UTC

	blamebrampton 2007-12-25 04:45 pm UTC (link)
	This was so gripping and so perfectly captured the way that disability can feel as though it separates you from life, and then ALSO perfectly captured the way that a few changes can make disability just another part of life. I loved the insights into so many aspects of their worlds that you wove into this story, it was rich and rewarding. Malachic is very lucky! (Reply to this) (Thread)

	rurounihime 2008-01-08 09:36 pm UTC (link)
	Thank you so much for calling my story "gripping." Thanks for getting so into it! It's always a treat to get this sort of feedback from readers, and I really appreciate it. (Reply to this) (Parent)

calanthe11
2007-12-25 06:47 pm UTC (link)

Wow - I just spent two hours entirely engrossed in your story. I really like very much how you took serious the psychological after-effects of both Harry's and Draco's experiences in the War. I love how you sometimes only hinted at things - Draco's scars, his half-memories of having to do Voldemort's will and torture people - without spelling it all out. Your writing is beautiful. And your characterisation of both Harry and Draco is wonderful, very insightful, too, of post-war traumata. I love, too, the many thoughts about the differences between magic and Muggle medicine. As I said - WOW!

(Reply to this) (Thread)

rurounihime
2008-01-08 09:40 pm UTC (link)

I really like very much how you took serious the psychological after-effects of both Harry's and Draco's experiences in the War.

One of the things I was concerned with about the canon series was whether or not any of the people involved in the war would have any repercussions afterward, or whether there would be a quick-fix or a show of ignorance. I have to say that while there wasn't a quick fix, I felt the epilogue lacked any address of what might have happened afterward. However, it was far too short an epilogue to really get into the meat of it, so I'm giving it the benefit of the doubt. ^_^

Thank you so much for such a nice comment!

(Reply to this) (Parent)

	gina87 2007-12-25 09:33 pm UTC (link)
	Wow, really lovely story! (Reply to this) (Thread)

	rurounihime 2008-01-08 09:40 pm UTC (link)
	Thank you for reading! (Reply to this) (Parent)

	devian_11 2007-12-26 01:55 am UTC (link)
	This was very, very beautiful, interesting, so real. I enjoyed every sentence. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	rurounihime 2008-01-08 09:41 pm UTC (link)
	Thank you very much, especially for calling it "real." That's such a wonderful compliment to receive. ^_^ (Reply to this) (Parent)

	i_claudia 2007-12-26 03:20 am UTC (link)
	Wow. Just... wow. This is a beautiful story; lucky malachic! I love the way you draw us so far into the story without feeling the need to spell everything out, and the way you paint both the boys' experiences makes my heart ache for them. This story is definitely going to go in my favorites! (Reply to this) (Thread)

	rurounihime 2008-01-08 11:31 pm UTC (link)
	Thank you so much for reading! And thanks for putting it in your favorites. That is such a wonderful compliment. ^_^ (Reply to this) (Parent)

	ravus_orbis 2007-12-26 06:03 am UTC (link)
	This was... well, different. I loved it. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	rurounihime 2008-01-08 11:31 pm UTC (link)
	Haha, thank you so much! (Reply to this) (Parent)

	twistedm 2007-12-26 06:39 am UTC (link)
	omg, beautiful. absolutely beautiful. i'd be more explicit about why, exactly, except that it's nearly 2am and i should have gone to bed ages ago. but thank you. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	rurounihime 2008-01-08 11:32 pm UTC (link)
	Thank you so much for reading my fic. I really appreciate the comment. ^_^ (Reply to this) (Parent)

irrevokable
2007-12-26 07:12 am UTC (link)

oh my gosh that was absolutely heart-wrenching and beautifully written. I am always one for stories where both boys are somehow broken or have alignments that neither one can properly control and just how you described them both and the growth of their relationship was so incredibly fantastic. I especially loved how you described each seizure differently and how no two times were exactly the same. excellent, excellent story; definitely one of my favourites of this exchange. ♥

(Reply to this) (Thread)

	rurounihime 2008-01-08 11:33 pm UTC (link)
	I especially loved how you described each seizure differently and how no two times were exactly the same. Thank you so much! I am relieved that you enjoyed the story, especially this particular part of it. I don't know much about experiencing seizures, so this was a challenge. (Reply to this) (Parent)

elsie
2007-12-26 08:11 am UTC (link)

The rec I've posted on my journal (since it's flocked):

I love this thing. I love the premise, and the clean solid writing, and the characterisations--especially Harry. This is one of my favourite adult Harrys ever: eager to rescue and stubborn as always, but in a delightfully quiet way. And Draco is bitter and prickly and kind of a hero, IMO, just for going on living. They're both so human and vulnerable, yet indestructible.

Bloody fantastic. I will be watching to see who you are. :)

(Reply to this) (Thread)

	rurounihime 2008-01-08 11:36 pm UTC (link)
	Thank you so very much for such a nice and thoughtful recommendation for my story. I really appreciate it. But I really love that you think of Draco as a hero. That is such a wonderful thing to say. ^__^ (Reply to this) (Parent)

irya_angelus
2007-12-26 08:40 am UTC (link)

I am completely blown away by this story. I wish I could be as eloquent as you deserve but all I can really say is how deeply your story has touched me. Though hurt/comfort fics are common in fandom, your piece is above and beyond anything I've ever read before. The way you've written Harry and Draco's pains and struggles to live as best they could with their afflictions is amazing. And that they are eventually able to do it together, as lovers and partners, fully accepting and loving, is a success more sweet than their being able to manage and control their afflictions themselves. This was an absolutely wonderful read ^^

(Reply to this) (Thread)

	rurounihime 2008-01-08 11:37 pm UTC (link)
	You have given me such lovely feedback here. It really is wonderful to be able to see what your reactions were to my story. Thank you for reading and for telling me what you thought. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	mlab555 2007-12-26 09:09 am UTC (link)
	Beautiful story. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	rurounihime 2008-01-08 11:37 pm UTC (link)
	Thank you! (Reply to this) (Parent)

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