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Final Fantasy XII community
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[Oct. 6th, 2008|02:23 pm] |
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[Oct. 6th, 2008|05:00 am] |
| [ | Tags | | | musings | ] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | home | ] |
| [ | mood |
| |  recumbent | ] |
| [ | music |
| | something techno-y | ] |
When my sugars drop, like when I take too much insulin or don't eat enough, right before the shaking and the stumbling and the general feeling of heaviness in my limbs and muscles, I feel good. Real good. I can't say that I would know, but I compare it in my head to how a heroin or crack addict addict would feel right after they take a hit, but less addicting.
I feel my heart pound, heavy in my chest, speeding up. I can feel... something in my blood, like a physical presence in my veins; I see it in my mind as a silver liquid. My whole body feels like liquid, more fluid and flexible than I usually feel; less brittle and spongy and old. There's a coolness in my blood, a welcome relief from the heat that normally courses through it. The silty feeling of sand or grains of sugar running through my veins and arteries is gone, and it feels wonderful; like the feeling of satin slipping through your fingers after running your hand a little more than gently over sandpaper.
But soon my hands start to shake, and my heart is beating so violently it feels like it may rip out of my chest. Sometimes a cold sweat starts. I have to eat something then. And my high is over all too soon. |
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[Oct. 6th, 2008|12:15 am] |
| [ | music |
| | Billy Joel - Why Should I Worry | ] |
I had a good day and got to see THE BOYS and play Smash Brothers Brawl and was a total ditz and started...telling Jacob a story he told me, like, yesterday. GG, ME.
I have some kinda sinus thing going on, and decongestants aren't doing jack for all the mucus crammed up in my eustachian tubes, so I feel like I have cotton crammed in my ears. Maybe I should gargle saltwater or something??
Also, today I missed my offramp to I-5 South because the radio was playing Rick Astley and I was too busy finding that hilarious to pay attention to the exits. So I drove aaaallll the way out to Benicia and took 680 down to 580 to reach Livermore.
But I didn't have to sit through 60 miles on I-5 that way. Thank you, Rick Astley ;;b |
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| Laughter is the best medicine . . . for something? :P |
[Oct. 6th, 2008|01:58 am] |
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[Oct. 5th, 2008|10:14 pm] |
Today is my fifth LJ anniversary. Have some statistics!
Date created: 2003-10-05 12:48:41
Date updated: 2008-10-05 06:48:02, 22 hours ago
Journal entries: 1,242
Comments: Posted: 6,153 - Received: 9,175
Five years already on this journal, and hopefully many more to come. :)
In other news, You Know You're At A Liberal Arts University When...
...your science professor requires a 2-3 page single-spaced essay for your test on Friday.
I've never had to write an essay in a science class before. Lab write-ups and so on, yes. Actual essays, no. XD
I want the week to just get on with it already. My debit card expired in September and my bank hadn't sent me a new one, so I called them on Thursday and hopefully I'll get a new one soon. And I mean really soon because I have no money until I get that debit card. (Well, I do have a credit card, but I don't like using it that much because I hate being in debt.)
Also I ordered a bunch of books from Barnes and Noble, and those are supposed to get here on Tuesday. I want it to be Tuesday because I WANT THOSE BOOKS. |
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| DAMN IT |
[Oct. 5th, 2008|10:55 pm] |
Jax, WTF?! Your defense is supposed to be your strength! What the fuck? Sack Waffleburger, for fuck's sake. ARGH RAR SNARL SNAP.
p.s. Dear Green Bay, way to lose it at the end.
Dear Redskins, ILU. ♥ Lovely job. Carry on.
Dear Carolina: Ok, ok, so KC isn't exactly what one might call a challenge. But the shutout was still beautiful to see. Kitty approves 110%.
It's been a good weekend. Saturday I went to do the bridesmaid fitting for ![[info]](http://p-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) sabrielrose and calhin's wedding - sabrielrose's wedding dress is beautiful. Oh, my goodness, yes. ♥ Saturday night was Newbie Game for Dead City. We got a fair crop of fresh meat newbies; hopefully they stick around. Michael Downey encouraged me to make an epically fail Praxis bid, but who cares, it was a oneshot.
I finished my DCP character for the year. I've been wanting to play this character for years. Kitty is pleased to finally get the opportunity.
In other news, I watched Secretary tonight. Props to celeloriel, first_seventhe, mithrigil and puella_nerdii for the rec. Shiny. ♥
Also randomly, wrenbow and mrsteninch make me feel old. I make references to things that happened when I was in high school and they're like "Um, I was 8 then." and I"m just like *headdesk* I love them anyway though. ♥
and now...I must decide if I am going to read, play Persona 3, or go to sleep. That last one sounds awfully appealing.
Oh yes! Mike and I started playing Mass Effect today. I cannot believe the number of achievements that are predicated on multiple play-throughs. although I am frustrated that now Mass Effect shows on my gamertag, even though we didn't START it on my gamertag, and shows 0 achievements and my OCD is Extremely Displeased by this fact. Kind of like how I'm really bothered by Blue Dragon still sitting there smirking at me because I never actually started it, and yet it shows on my card. My OCD, I will show you it.
But yes, Mass Effect. Seems to be...much like any other Bioware game. We're going the Paragon path, because it's always less fun to go back to the Light side after you've been a Sith Lord...wait, sorry, this is Mass Effect, not KOTOR. Um. Anyway, we are being nice. And our guy has the prettiest green eyes ever. I have such a weakness for green eyes. Woe. We're on the Citadel immediately following the Eden Prime thing, and doing the traditional "I am playing a Bioware RPG! Let me see how many sidequests may be located in this finite area!" deal. I, uh, might have made really dorky squeaky noises every time we found a Keeper to scan. Mike was laughing at me and saying "You're having too much fun with that" and I was like "Well, it's like Pokémon. You gotta catch 'em all. And you know me and collectibles in RPGs." Which at least made him laugh.
Overall, it's been a good weekend. and now I am tired and will go to bed instead of doing the dishes. Ha. |
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[Oct. 5th, 2008|11:11 pm] |
Yesterday: Party. Fun. Drink. Drink. Walk outside. Drink. Make out with Donna. Drink. Jokes. Make out with Donna. Drink. Clean up. Say something stupid. Fight with Donna. Pull out a bed for Manny. Make up with Donna. Degrassi.
Marissa from the party apparently knows Alexis (same school, same major, they shared some classes) so I got her number and hopefully we can all hang out, she was a cool chick.
Watched True Blood while eating dinner today. I thought I was hooked before, but Tara and Lafayette prove to get even more awesome each episode.
( True Blood Spoilarz ) |
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| The Things We Forget - Aoi/Uruha - 2/3 |
[Oct. 6th, 2008|11:06 am] |
| [ | music |
| | Glassworks - Opening - Philip Glass | ] |
Title: The Things We Forget
Author: kara_16
Genre: Angst
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: None
Chapter: 2/3
Pairing: Aoi/Uruha
Disclaimer: Don’t own them
Summary: He holds his head in his hands and lets out a scream, the hurt becoming too much, his legs going numb, the cold and the sad and the lonely taking over until all he feels is hurt, hurt, hurt.
Notes: I'm seriously in love with this fic.....and I don't know why.
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| Story! |
[Oct. 6th, 2008|01:56 pm] |
Title: The Morning After
Author: reprint
Rating: T
Pairings involved: Tony/Kate, McGee/Abby, Gibbs/Jenny
Warnings: none really
Short description: Ending up in Anthony DiNozzo's bed was not at the top of Caitlin Todd's 'to do' list...
( Chapter 26: Unbelievable .. )
Previous chapters are here.
Make a request here. |
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[Oct. 5th, 2008|06:50 pm] |
I am so exhausted. I pretty much haven't been out of bed since Thursday, except to go to one of my classes on Friday because we had a test (which I failed, by the way, even though I thought I knew the stuff well enough to pass), and yesterday so I could buy some patterns at Hancock. I didn't even go to my Bible as Lit class, even though we had a reflection paper due, which I only have half done, even today.
I'm half tempted to just drop my courses, and honestly the only thing that prevents me from doing so is that I worry that I won't be able to use the rec center if I do. Which is kind of ironic, I think, considering how little energy I have.
I don't know what it is, I don't know if it's my eating sugary carb goodness because I'm depressed and not taking enough insulin in hopes that I'll lose some weight even if I feel like crap while doing it the diabetes, if it's the fibromyalgia, or just sleeping too much that's causing all my sleepiness, but it's such a hard task to get up out of bed these days. I find that I try not to. I don't have the energy to write my papers or write what the plotbunnies want, or to draw any designs or the art trade I have going with Bridget. I can only lie here and read, and even then my eyes blur and droop so often it takes me twice as long to read something than it should.
Fuck. If this keeps up, I'll never get any work done on my designs for that contest.
I want to call doctors tomorrow. I keep wanting to do that, but I'm so exhausted I can barely go to class and then I fall in bed, so exhausted, unable to really move but unable to sleep either. But I really need to make those calls. I have to call the neurologist and tell them that I can't wait another three months to see them, that this is destroying my GPA, destroying my life. I had an appointment on my birthday, but I rescheduled because it would make me miss both Accounting and Bible as Lit and if I missed another Bible as Lit class, my final grade would start to be reduced. I should have just gone though, because now I've missed all three sessions last week and my paper's late. At least if I went to my appointment I might start to have some relief.
Fuckfuckfuckingfuck. I feel so hopeless, you know? I feel disconnected and beyond help. I'm not depressed per se, but without hope, if that makes any sense. There are so many things wrong in my life that I know how to take care of, how to fix, how to make better. But I don't do it. Why? What the fuck is so wrong with me that I can't even bring myself to make myself better? Am I stuck in a rut and used to the way my life is that I don't want to change? Am I just that lazy? Do I stay sick and let things run rampant as an excuse for my laziness and for the attention and pity? I'd like to think not, that if I'm questioning that then it can't be the case. I just know something really has to change. Moping and falling to pieces hasn't worked for the past fourteen years, I don't know why I think it will now.
/pity party |
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| Tweets for Today |
[Oct. 5th, 2008|08:06 pm] |
JOURNEY TO THE CENTER OF MCGUIRKTH.....
Automatically shipped by LoudTwitter |
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| もしきみにひとつだけねがいとかなうとしたら。。。 |
[Oct. 5th, 2008|07:53 pm] |
Then I would grant that wish for Slayers to continue. I'm not kidding. I think I'll go crazy if Slayers ends at Revolution @____@
But really, that was just to start a random post O_O.
Dear friends, should I make my journal friends-only now .-.? |
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| Just call me Alexander Catiline, baby. |
[Oct. 5th, 2008|01:15 pm] |
Dear wanderlight:
I don't really know how to tell you this, but I'm in love with your sister. I think I realized it when I changed tennis shoes at the mental hospital and I saw you carve your initials into the crazy monk. I'm sure you're frostbitten enough to understand that Extreme Home Makeover sucks. I'm returning your ring to you, but I'll keep your photo as a memory. You should also know that I get sick when I think of hating the Boston Celtics.
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With ease,
terra
( Sorry Rita. )
So I thought I would talk something about what I'm actually doing this year, which is MY THESIS. My thesis is about the use of classical pseudonyms in the newspaper debate over the Jay Treaty. Which is to say, "how the founding fathers insulted each other in print." Like this:
JEFFERSON: That illegitimate wanker Hamilton is trying to destroy the republic with economics, and, like, machines. HE IS TOTALLY A BRITISH SPY. I have PROOF. This one time he came over to my house and was all, "Who the hell is John Locke?" That's right, he doesn't even watch Lost. And then he went on and ON and ON about how much he loved Julius Caesar, which hell-ooooo, didn't that guy totally destroy a republic in order to become a king and wear prettier togas?? We don't want Hamilton wearing any pretty togas.
HAMILTON: You all suck.
I, er, promise not to talk about it too much.
( My day: why I do not post about it often. )
Taadaaaaa. Next time I get to illustrate the lovely threesome icor and I will be having with Zombie Argath. |
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| Yes this'll be taking me a while lmao, talk about some massive penance for listening to JBros |
[Oct. 5th, 2008|05:03 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  hungry | ] |
| [ | music |
| | The documentary on Ayu's AT07 DVD. | ] |
A Artist Entry Complete~. Up next I'm planning a special treat: ~Halloween Special Soundtrack Entry~. Basically I'm uploading all the creepster music I have for films, tv shows or games and hoping you put it to some kind of use this coming Halloween. It should be up later today/tonight.
Oh and I'm actually getting some work done! Like finding a theme to tie into my proposed thesis for a paper I need to write for English Lit. Internal and external heroism & revolution is one I came up with so far, though I want to take a look at a few other pieces that caught my eye and see if those might not be more fun to write about. I have this girl in my class who wants me to "help" her with her paper next weekend and I really honest to Heathus don't feel like doing it at all =\
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| W-What the hell, Sakurai. |
[Oct. 5th, 2008|04:27 pm] |
Kirby Superstar Ultra is an amazing nostalgia trip, man. It actually... felt a little easy because I played the crap out of the original Kirby Superstar, and while I appreciated the little updates-the new design for the final boss of the Great Cave Offensive, which I now know is totally Proto-Master Hand, and all the shiny new backgrounds-it still wasn't as hard as I remembered it. When I was a kid, I dreaded playing through Revenge of the Metaknight despite how amazingly epic it is because I had so much trouble with it. Now, I managed to get through it in like. Less than a half an hour.
Of course, all of this is kind of moot because Revenge of Dedede? My God, Sakurai! Please put Spring Breeze back on its Prozac before I get nightmares and for the love of God don't make me fight that blimp from Kirby's Dream Land! I-I don't know if I could take it!
OH JESUS WHY
EDIT: PFFFT OKAY
THAT WASN'T NIGHTMARISHLY HARD AND THEN IT TURNED INTO PURE LULZ
ILU DEDEDE |
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[Oct. 5th, 2008|03:04 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | Bed | ] |
| [ | mood |
| | still hung over | ] |
I got to talk N last night. She called while we were partying at Satan's. She needs to be harassed more to get her to come and visit. If possible, we should get her to come and visit the same weekend that Eve and Pointdexter come down. That would be, perhaps, too much awesome too handle.
The party last night was fantastic. I am a bit hung over from it. No headache but my stomach is rather displeased with my abuse of it. Blargh. It was worth it!! And, at some point, I will go retrieve my car...
I've been reading and goofing around in Travian all afternoon. I finished The Sinestro Corps storyline in Green Lantern. Mike lent me the comics and some other Green Lantern stuff so i could catch up a bit. I liked the storyline a lot but what REALLY tickled me was, during a fight between Superman Prime and Ion, they crashed into the Croton dam. Then they were knocked into Indian Point. Both of these places were a couple of miles from where I grew up. My parents still live in Croton. I had never seen it mentioned in a comic book before. I think I have Salem envy since the XMansion is like 10 miles from my house. Why does Salem Center get all the love?? Ok, end that comic book geekiness.
Now for some manga geekiness. Nah, I'll get to that later. I think I shall now have CHICKEN WOOOOOO |
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| OH SNAP! I found my new calling! For this week, any way... |
[Oct. 5th, 2008|01:11 pm] |
| [ | Tags | | | random | ] |
| [ | mood |
| |  amused | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Nostradamus: 500 Years Later | ] |
According to this History Channel documentary, Nostradamus predicted like everything. If people knew that he was right so much, how come we're all so surprised when bad things happen? We're surprised because most of his "predictions" are a bit of a stretch. He just writes some random craziness and people are all like "He's talking about Hitler!". How in the hell do you figure that? Listening to the rationale on why what he wrote predicted things is kind of funny. Like how he predicted JFK's assassination. And Bill Clinton's shenanigans. Those ones were the most ridiculous.
I mean, if you really want to believe that he could predict the future, you can twist just about anything to fit in his random ramblings. And they were really random. I can write random crap and call it predicting the future. I should do that. Maybe in 500 years they'll talk about how I knew what was coming! That would be awesome!! That's it! I'm writing a book full of random 3 sentence poem-thingies that predict the future. Just you wait- I'm going to be the next Nostradamus!! Right after I get my YouTube video...
WAIT!! Brilliant idea! I can make a YouTube video series about becoming the next Nostradamus!! I can film myself as I write my predictions! This is perfect!! I can't believe I came up with this! It's super clever! Go me!!!
Did I mention that this documentary is hilarious? I did? Well, it still is. They decided "the black one" referred to in one of the "prophecies" was Colin Powell. I seriously laughed out loud. You need to watch this when they show it again. It's super funny.
P.S. Why do they interview Penn and Teller when the one guy doesn't ever talk? Why not just tell the non-talking one to stay home? Or at least off camera. It's not like he's adding anything to the interview. I agree with the talking one, though. Nostradamus didn't predict anything because no one talked about his predictions before the fact.
Any way, I need to get to my seminar. Bye for now!!! |
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| Meme and Drabble |
[Oct. 5th, 2008|12:02 pm] |
Once again, I'm posting iwhtout replying to comments. I hate doing it, but I have midterms tomorrow and don't have the time. I'll get to it during 'Heroes' tomorrow night (I'm SO excited).
Anyway, I was tagged by aussievamp for this meme and just had to do it:
( The Meme )
Now for the drabble:
Title: Tease
Rating: R
Pairing: Peter/Sylar
Summary: “Did you do this just to please me, Peter?”
Warnings: dark, bloody, violent, very slight spoilers up to 03x02 (which you'll miss if you didn't see the episode)
A/N: I needed to get something dark out of my system. A drabble written for the misison_insane prompt: tease.
( Tease ) |
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[Oct. 5th, 2008|10:41 am] |
Happy Birthday, stealthcomic!!!! I hope you and Vis are having a great day! |
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| re: this is sad |
[Oct. 5th, 2008|09:36 am] |
There is something wrong with this scenario.
I just used real money (hard-earned funds gained through the rigorous horrors of full time employment) to purchase virtual money (Microsoft Points) to then turn around and use that money to purchase fake video game money (300,000 gald in Tales of Vesperia).
But as much as I enjoy level grinding in this game, I don't enjoy it enough to spend hours and hours with a couple of Sephira equipped to give me a little boost to earn enough money needed to get into Yumanju (900,000) and pay off some old lady (500,000) for Estelle to get a title.
I even sold all my weapons. ._. *emo* |
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