Feminist Sexuality Discussion

Porn, shame and the matriarchy

Mon, 30 Jun 2008 14:10:02 GMT

Gail Dines and her anti porn slide show infuriate me.

It not the Christian right, same shit different day bullshit

It not the dehumanising of sex workers, when she talked about how porn makes men rape, however “she’s not walking down the street we are” pointing to a soft porn model, as if sex workers get some magical pass when it come to male sexual violence.

It the fact that is her world, at least her utopia I don’t exist, and you know what, I like me. In her lectures she talks about men who use porn, never women, about how porn shows “body punishing sex” with the assumption that no real women would ever like body-punishing sex, You know what I woke up sore this morning, most of my body hurts because of the sex last night, and my mouth is sore from how stupidly I have been grinning all morning. I like my life, quit standing in my way.

I can tell you the moment I started collecting porn, my father had gotten a new laptop from work when I was 14, and I inherited the hand me down laptop, it was a Pentium 2 266 with I think 32 megs of ram, it had a four gig hard drive and a internet connection.

I was conflicted, I wanted things which where wrong, I considered my self a feminist and a social justice activist so why did I want thing which where so violent?

On of the arguments I hear from the rad fem crowd is that soft porn, vanilla porn is a gateway drug, once the (male) viewer has seen people fuck he needs something more, harder more violent, more body punishing, that has not been my experience, one of the first pornographic videos I downloaded was cool devices (serious not safe for work, or most humans). Lets make no bones about this, the kind of porn I want to watch isn’t nice, it isn’t appearing at any of your local video stores. It is dark, rough, violent, it often contains descriptions of non-consent, my earliest sexual desire was to be tied up with a girl, naked, pushed up against her unable to get away.

Crucify me or do you wanna save me yes, no maybe...
It doesn't matter baby you are so clean
But I can't make you wanna scream scream, scream, scream with me...

Bright red scream – my ruin

I went through cycles of downloading watching and deleting in disgust that I could want that want to see that done to people, I was meant to be a feminist right.

Most of the sex that I had as a teenager sucked, I had partners who where everything that would for me, a young feminist women. Unfortunately it was dry, painful and boring and I put up with it because I wasn’t sure that I could be a good feminist and enjoy myself sexually. I had the sex my partners wanted me to have, and that my feminist elders wanted me to have and tried to forget about the kind of sex I wanted to have, in the name of women’s rights and opportunities. I am yet to forgive Gail and those like her for that.

Cross posted to my journal pleasureact

Web sites with Australian erotica / porn? - Xposted

Mon, 19 May 2008 10:09:45 GMT

Please forward to all your networks!

----------

Hi everyone,

i'm currently looking for Web sites with Australian-produced erotica /
porn - in particular, stuff which is (pro-)feminist and pro-diversity
in terms of body size / shape, ability, gender, sexual orientation,
etc. - to add to the 'Erotica' section of the Pleasure Activism
Australia Web site:

http://pleasureactivism.org/erotica.html

Any ideas? If so, let me know! i'd love to hear from you. :-) Please
send your recommendations / suggestions to myself at:

alexis@pleasureactivism.org

Thanks!

Alexis Hazell
Web site administrator
Pleasure Activism Australia

legality of burlesque

Fri, 02 May 2008 20:57:41 GMT

Hi everyone,

My college burlesque troupe is putting on our first show tonight, and the local cops have threatened arrest. We're being quite careful already about concealing our naughty bits, but we're in New York State, where as far as I know it's completely legal to walk around topless. As far as I'm concerned this is all BS, though I'm not sure why they're trying to scare us in this uber liberal college town. I'm not in charge, so I'm not directly in the loop of whats going on.

Can anyone suggest any resources I can find online as far as the legality of a show that involves stripping, but no nudity? It would be great to have some firm knowledge to back us up should they try to pull something.

Thanks!!

**Just got word that it was resolved! Our people knew the law better than they did and apparently they were nice about it, too. : )

Australian GLBTI Mardi Gras this Saturday: SEX WORKERS AND SUPPORTERS FLOAT - all the info you need!

Tue, 26 Feb 2008 00:19:15 GMT

Hi there beautiful cats and kittens!!

Here is ALL the information you will need for the sex worker float in this Saturday's triumphant GLBTI QUEER MARDI GRAS MARCH!

Yay!

Please read through this CAREFULLY as it contains IMPORTANT info!!!! And feel free to distribute it widely throughout your friends and networkers - remember, ALL sex workers and supporters are welcome and encouraged to join us!

Ok a couple of FAN FACTS first:

* This is the biggest parade EVER. They are at ABSOLUTE CAPACITY with 10,000 people marching! Holy cow!
* This is the world's largest nighttime parade
* If you lined up all the entrants (150) it would be about 4.6km in length!
* Although the parade starts at 8.00pm the floats at the end of the parade won't leave their position in "Start" until 10.00pm! (don't worry we're not at the end!)
* The audience will be over 150,000 people.

Now, the sex worker float is in Block E. So, not too far from the start at all. Block A departs at 7.45pm so, if all goes to plan we should start marching around 8.30 - 9.00pm.

Here is what you MUST KNOW.
* Our colour theme is red and we will be carrying red umbrellas which have become an international symbol of sex worker rights. Please bring a red brolley or two (one to share) and carrying red banners. When there is a large collection of umbrellas it's a pretty impressive sight - and the bigger the brolley the more of us there appear to be! Sex worker organisations are welcome to bring their own banners. Touching Base will be marching (and rolling) with us.
* We are meeting from 3.00pm at Scarlet Alliance HQ: 349 CROWN STREET, SURRY HILLS, CNR ALBION AND CROWN. This will give you an opportunity to get ready, chat and make friends, and get "in the mood". We have accessible facilities on the ground floor at this premises.
* We MUST be in our "Start" position by 5.30PM. We will therefore be leaving Scarlet Alliance HQ between 4.45pm and 5.00pm and walking down to the parade start area. Please arrive at Scarlet Alliance HQ no later than 4.45pm.
WHY IS THAT SO IMPORTANT?
* Without a wrist band, you WILL NOT be permitted by Mardi Gras officials into the Start area to join us. We will be giving out the wrist bands at Scarlet HQ at 4.30pm. Remember: no wristband, no marching!
* We will be in our start position for about four hours. There are toilet facilities, including accessible toilets (but not many of those unfortunately) but please bring plenty of food and drink (including water). We do not have a float, so you will not be able to store anything on the back of it, so please don't bring anything you don't want to carry the 4 or 5 kms the parade runs for.
* On the subject of stilettos: twice now I have done a parade march in five-inch stiletto heels and lemme tell ya: it's MOIDER. Make sure your stiletto heels have a platform, or choose more "sensible" (totally subjective term) footwear. Believe me, you WILL remove them at the end of the march and then your fabulous outfit will be ruined by the absence of footwear. I can proudly say I made it to the end of both marches, but collapsed immediately. (Or wear a fabulously decorated backpack to pack your heels to be pulled out 15 mins before departure!)
* Compliance checks begin at 5.30pm. Mardi Gras are VERY strict about this and say those who disobey the rules will be KICKED OUT and not permitted to march. Therefore,
PLEASE DO NOT BRING:
- Flammables and explosives of ANY type (cigarette lighters excepted)
- Pets/animals (seriously)
- Anything of dubious legality you can't secrete on your person

Now, since Scarlet HQ is very close to the parade area, traffic will probably be heavy. It might be better to take a cab, or use public transport, where possible, rather than fight for a parking spot.

However, if something terrible happens and you are unable to make it to Scarlet HQ before 4.45pm, you can contact one of the following people:

Janelle - 0411 985 135
Elena - 0401 317 102
Elise - 0413 723 205 (that's yours truly)

New Mardi Gras are doing the parade a little differently this year. Since it is impossible to see when you are marching, here's a little outline.
- The Dykes on Bikes will kick off as usual, but then they will go to the back of the parade and ride through again.
- Usually they begin the parade with the biggest float. This year they are kicking it off with the '78ers', those who were there for the first Mardi Gras (in 1978 hence the 78'ers). Then the floats will gradually get bigger and bigger, capping off with an absolute spectacular!
- Margaret Cho is the Chief of Parade this year!

Please see the attached document for a run down of this info and the privacy notice. Any questions, feel free to call one of the three people listed above!

HAPPY MARDI GRAS AND SEE YOU THERE!

LOVE AND KISSES, SQUIGGLES AND SNORES
ELISE/E THE BEE/PRINCESS BEE

"Girls taught to value sex over achievement and intelligence"

Tue, 11 Dec 2007 03:44:19 GMT

Girls taught to value sex over achievement and intelligence

MALCOLM LAW

TEENAGE girls would rather be sexy than clever, according to a new book which blames celebrities such as Paris Hilton, Christina Aguilera and Britney Spears for the phenomenon.

Carol Platt Liebau, a leading political commentator in the US and the first female managing editor of Harvard Law Review, warned young women were being taught to believe "sexy" equates to empowered.

The author said "promiscuity and sexual aggression" were now being seen as the only way to achieve admiration.

And she suggested girls now competed for attention based on how much they were sexually willing to do for boys.

Women's groups last night also warned that the sexualisation of young girls was making them increasingly vulnerable.

Ms Liebau's book, Prude: How The Sex- Obsessed Culture Damages Girls, blames the music and videos of Spears, Aguilera and Lil' Kim, as well as films such as Cruel Intentions, for making teenagers value sexuality above all else.

She said: "The overwhelming lesson teenagers are now learning from the world around them is that being 'sexy' is the ultimate accolade, trumping intelligence, character and all other accomplishments. In a culture that celebrates Paris Hilton [and] thong underwear, there's scant modesty or achievement that isn't coupled with sex appeal. Girls are being led to believe that they're in control when it comes to sexual relationships.

"But they're actually living in a profoundly anti-feminist landscape where girls compete for attention on the basis of how much they are sexually willing to do for the boys. And living in an overly sexualised culture takes a toll on girls."

A spokeswoman for Rape Crisis Scotland said the sale of products such as junior pole-dancing kits was particularly concerning.

She said: "We are concerned about the over-sexualisation of children and the effect it has on women and girls' self-esteem. Young women do experience a lot of pressure to have sex."

A spokeswoman for Scottish Women Against Pornography said:

"It's setting young women and girls up as targets. It's a backlash to any sense of women's achievement. The idea that this is sexual liberation is just re-branding the same oppression."

Phillip Hodson, a fellow of the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy in London, said the influence of TV, the media and Hollywood had made society more focused on personal appearance.

But he added: "I think the problem is exaggerated. Nature wishes you to breed, so sexuality has always been there. What's wrong with being intelligent and taking care of yourself? But if you are just trading on your sexuality, the big question is what are you going to do when you lose your looks?"

• Prude: How The Sex-Obsessed Culture Damages Girls is released later this month.

PARIS HILTON: ONLINE NOTORIETY AND A JAIL TERM

PARIS Hilton shot to fame when her home-made sex video appeared on the internet.

The hotel dynasty heiress has since fronted various TV shows. She was jailed earlier this year for driving under the influence of alcohol. She has also feuded publicly with the actress Lindsay Lohan.

BRITNEY'S CONTROVERSIAL KISS-OFF

BRITNEY Spears, whose first taste of the limelight came on the wholesome Mickey Mouse Club, has never been far from controversy in recent years. She locked lips with Madonna at an awards show in 2003 and was snapped without any pants on before losing custody of her two children earlier this year.

AGUILERA'S DIRRTY MOVE

CHRISTINA Aguilera's "girl next door" image vanished as she was transformed into a raunchy singer in the video for the 2002 hit single Dirrty.

She has been hailed for "making pregnancy sexy" after posing with her naked bump for a magazine.

LIL' KIM: X-RATED LYRICS, OUTRAGEOUS OUTFITS

LIL' Kim is best known in the UK for performing on the Moulin Rouge soundtrack hit Lady Marmalade in 2001 alongside Christina Aguilera.

Her songs have achieved notoriety for their X-rated and sexually upfront lyrics and her outrageous outfits have raised eyebrows.

How much blame can be placed on the media? Should we also be looking at the home and school environments? Is their value and empowerment in claiming - or reclaiming - your own sexuality if you're a teenage girl as opposed to a "grown" woman?

International Day to End Violence Against Sex Workers: Red Umbrella Event

Thu, 06 Dec 2007 05:56:58 GMT

The official date is 17th December, but since we'll have a bunch of out of town sex workers in Sydney on the 13th, we decided to do it then.

Instead of focusing JUST on the old demonising-clients victimising-workers stance that always takes precedence to the detriment of other, equally as important, issues, this year our focus is to be on other forms of violence, e.g.: the violence that comes from discrimination, unfair legislation, denial of basic human rights.

It is all these factors that actually create the environment in which physically and sexually violent people target sex workers.

SO. PLEASE COME AND SHOW YOUR SUPPORT, OPEN TO SEX WORKERS AND OUR SUPPORTERS.

4.45 for a 5pm start, Thursday 13th December 2006,
Local Council and Shires Association, corner of 28 Margaret Street Sydney,
corner of Margaret and York Street, 50 metres from Wynyard Train Station.
THIS IS A HIGHLY PUBLIC, PROMINENT PLACE IN THE CBD and will be taking place at peak hour as people start heading home or out for late night shopping! If identity is a concern to you, please feel free to wear a mask, or other disguisng clothing.

Sex workers and supporters in NSW are holding an end of year protest against the unfair brothel closures that local councils have led in NSW, thanks to the laws introduced by the Iemma Government in July this year.

Many Local Councils in NSW have discriminatory planning policies that make it impossible for the sex industry premises to be compliant. These Local Councils more recently have taken the extra step of enacting the new brothel closure orders against brothels, on the basis of complaints from larger brothel owners.
It gives councils the power to:
- shut off water
- shut off electricity
- evict people with no notice
- do all these things based on one complaint
and is a violation of basic human rights!
To register 'legally' as a brothel, the cost is prohibitive (over $20,000) and illogical planning policies make it difficult for small business to comply. Larger brothels who can afford the fees then target the smaller places. Under NSW legislation, an independent worker is defined as a 'brothel'; meaning large brothels can also eliminate this sort of competition by making complaints against independent workers.
MOST INDEPENDENT WORKERS DO NOT WANT A BIG YELLOW SIGN ON THEIR FRONT DOOR STATING THEIR INTENT TO RUN A SEX BUSINESS, AS COUNCIL CURRENTLY REQUIRES!
There have already been several cases of council workers demanding bribes or sexual favours in exchange for looking the other way!!!!

The closures are anti-competition, anti-sex worker, and are the worst case of state sanctioned violence against the sex industry in Australia.

Stop State Sanctioned Violence Against Sex Workers
Carry a red umbrella for the International Day to End Violence Against Sex Workers
We demand local council policy INCLUDE the sex industry, and stop discriminating against sex workers
We demand an end to anti-competition collusion by local councils - stop the corruption erruption!

Wear red, bring an umbrella and see ya there!

Sun, 04 Nov 2007 20:14:43 GMT

Hi!

What are your thoughts on breastfeeding?

I'm asking here because a) I can't imagine that they'd be okay with women using their bodies for anything they want, like erotic lactation, for example, and b) because I tried joining recently, but my membership was declined. I asked why via email, and they responded back telling me that it's because I'm a trans woman. From their email to me:

Megan,

You'll notice that we outline in the community info who is admitted into
the breastfeeding community: nursing mothers, pregnant mothers planning
to breastfeed, and mothers experienced in breastfeeding.

We've looked at your journal, and we are certainly not questioning your
female self-identity. However, since you describe yourself as a
trans-woman, it does seem unlikely that you would be physically able to
meet the requirements for membership.

If there are details of which we are unaware that would be relevant, by
all means let us know, and we will take that under consideration.

Thanks,

the LJ breastfeeding community moderators

I wrote them back and told them that I do, in fact, have breast milk and am planning on breastfeeding when I adopt and then tried to join again, but again I was, not surprisingly, denied.

I couldn't believe that they were so overtly transphobic!

Until I checked out their user info again. D:

So I'm totally going to advertise my alternative community here for anyone who's interested in lactation, erotic or otherwise :D
breast_milk

project

Sat, 03 Nov 2007 19:36:28 GMT

I’m doing a project for my Research Methods in Anthropology class on feminine beauty/attractiveness. Are there any Suicide Girls members here who would be willing to answer a *very* short survey in the near future? (It's not quite finished yet, and there's a one question freelist response we'd like just a couple people to answer first.) Please reply or send me an email if you're interested. raab03(at)newpaltz(dot)edu. If it's easier, I'll post the question on my lj, and then the survey on monday, and you can reply anonymously.

*Edit* The complete survey is now up at: http://www.surveymonkey.com/s.aspx?sm=_2fnHfocb8laGPi2EuuaBspw_3d_3d

thanks!

Why Yes, I am the Feminist Police

Tue, 30 Oct 2007 03:10:48 GMT

This post on Alas is incredibly well-intentioned and I mostly agree with her overall assertion that feminism is varied and diverse.
But it ain't that diverse. And appeals to the idea of "feminism is for everybody" don't really get us much of anywhere in actually addressing the reasons why feminism doesn't reach out to all women.
So, Feminism is for anybody who believes in supporting and empowering all women to dismantle the structures of sexist oppression, and in the process dismantle all structures of oppression.

Feminism is not for people who talk about "welfare queens" stealing their tax dollars, or who think that people who complain about the WIC program should just take what they can get or who have ever called a woman on 'welfare' lazy or irresponsible.
Feminism is not for those who think that only certain women have a right to bodily integrity.
Feminism is not for people who think that the struggles and petty concerns of upper middle class women in Connecticut are the only issues that matter. So that means that the New York Times, Naomi Wolff and Betty Friedan are out.
Feminism is not for people who gain fame and book deals by causing other women to suffer. That means feminism is not for: Melissa Farley, Ayaan Hirsi Ali, Janice Raymond, Robin Morgan, Phylis Chessler, Kate Roiphe
Feminism does not exist so that women of privilege can achieve self-actualization while trivializing the life and death struggles of less privileged women. Say Goodbye, Camille Paglia and Elizabeth Wurtzel. Don't let the door hurt your annoying, tit-displaying asses on the way out. Sophia Copola, you can go too. Jessica Valenti can stay, but on probation.
Feminism is not for men to tell women what does and does not oppress them, over the loud complaints of those women. STFU Robert Jensen and Peter Singer.
Feminism is not a weapon with which to beat on the lives and life choices of other women. ta-ta Linda Hirshman, Ariel Levy, Caitlin Flanagan (oh please please crawl into your meticulously decorated hole and die already would you, Mrs Flanagan?), Sheila Jeffreys, and the La Leche league.

Sure, there could be a feminism that welcomed these people. But it'd be a hollow echo of what should be a true idealogy of liberation. And maybe by showing the door to this collection of loud, obnoxious douchebags we'd finally have space in the discours for women too often ignored or downplayed by mainstream feminist discussions. Women like: Rickie Solinger, Chandra Mohanty, Marjane Satrapi, Leah Lakshmi Piepzna-Samarasinha, Dorothy Roberts, and probably a hundred more amazing feminists who I have never heard off because they are so rarely discussed in the media or the blogosphere.

(x-posted to feminist_sex and my journal

Submit to CineKink!!

Thu, 18 Oct 2007 15:01:36 GMT

CINEKINK NYC - CALL FOR ENTRIES

"The really alternative film festival"
February 26 - March 2, 2008

Presented by CineKink, an organization dedicated to the recognition and encouragement of sex-positive and kink-friendly depictions in film and television, CineKink NYC is seeking films and videos, of any length and genre, that celebrate and explore the wide diversity of sexuality. We're looking to blur some boundaries and will be considering offerings drawn from both Hollywood and beyond, explicit or not, with works ranging from documentary to drama, camp comedy to hot porn - and everything in between.

Cutting across orientations, topics covered at CineKink have included - but are by no means limited to - BDSM, leather and fetish, swinging, non-monogamy and polyamory, roleplay and gender bending. Or, frankly, given the current moralistic climate, as long as it involves consenting adults, just about anything celebrating sex as a right of self-expression is welcome for consideration. (Far be it from us to define "kink" - if you think your work might make sense in this context, please send it along!)

Scheduled for its fifth annual appearance February 26-March 2, 2008, the specially curated CineKink NYC will also feature a short film competition, audience choice awards, presentations, parties and a gala kick-off, with a national screening tour to follow.

Film and video submissions have a final deadline of November 15th.

For more information and to download an entry form, visit http://www.cinekink.com/entries.

---
Please feel free to post, publish or forward this information where appropriate.

(x-posted to cinekink and elsewhere)

Also inspired by That Place

Tue, 16 Oct 2007 00:29:18 GMT

particularly the person who asked why people "compartmentalize" and "don't examine" sexual desire. I felt like posting to my LJ and then thought it might also belong here. Sohereyago.

There are two "models" I've used to understand SM and SM desire throughout my life.

The first I remember most vividly when I called the urgent care line at my university. I'd been having serious trouble coming to terms with my desires, and had seriously self-harmed for the first time. I remember calling the helpline and talking to a young woman, probably a student. I confessed my desires and my shame and the fact that I'd cut myself out of shame. I can't remember if I begged her to help me change. Maybe I did. I remember staring at my half-drunk smoothie on my desk as it melted, feeling like I was in some weird dream.

She had no idea how to deal with me. I can't recall if I asked for an actual psychiatrist or if I just called back the next night. But the same thing happened, the crying confession, and suddenly the voice on the other end of the line said words that changed my whole life.

"Don't you realize that among people who have gone through serious trauma like you have, sadomasochistic sexual fantasies are common?"

Common? It rocked my universe. I wasn't weird at all. (It almost made me sad. Took away this feeling I had that I was one of the few, the marked, the profoundly perverted.) I was just damaged, just responding to things that had happened to me. In a way that was not only understandable, but sensible and perhaps even sane.

Those words changed my life. I don't know if I'd be here if they hadn't given me an anchor, a way to believe that I wasn't cursed or doomed or rotten, crazy, fundamentally wrong inside.

And that is one model. The trauma model. This model says something like: Sadomasochism is a response to trauma.

On this model, it's a coping device, essentially. People develop fixations with pain and with traumatic experiences involving power (say, abuse), perhaps because the experience of it is intense, perhaps because it leaves psychic scars. But people feel compulsions to act out or to re-live their trauma. Sadomasochistic fantasy is an attempt to do this, in order to regain control that we had torn from us.

This model is okay, so far as it goes. It offers us a chance to be something other than twisted, insane, incomprehensible. But it still leaves us with something odd and unacceptable, to my mind.

That is that if we still have these interests or fantasies many years after the initial event, this indicates that we have not adequately processed the trauma. I was told many times that my fantasies "might" go away, or lessen in intensity, once I had dealt with the underlying issue. It led to many bouts of guilt when my fantasies were particularly strong or particularly violent, and to paralyzing fear that I had backslid on some scale of Survivor's Progress.

And it led to people like my parents believing that someday I'd be cured of SM, and asking me why oh why oh why I remained obsessed with the things that had happened to me and telling me of their great hope that someday I would no longer be fascinated with pain.

I don't believe the trauma had no effect on me. I actually suspect that the fact that my strongest fantasies involve knives and blood have more than a little to do with being cut open. However, as I'll make clearer in a moment, I don't subscribe to this model, and I don't feel at all sure I wouldn't have developed other sadomasochistic interests if I hadn't been.

The second model is an orientational model. This is the theory that, at least for some people, SM desires simply are what they are, a facet of the person, like being straight or being gay. Like those, we don't know quite what causes them. Unlike those, we don't have (at least that I know of) any interesting research suggesting a biological basis or link or influence.

This is what we get -- or what I get, really, as I don't want to speak for others, least of all for researchers -- when I look around and see the people who tied themselves up at age 8, and don't really remember any abuse, thanks. The people who would try to finagle their friends into bossing them around, and fuss and fume when the toppy-tots they recruited were too kind. The people who were never spanked, but who would see the family across the street punishing the kids and feel all tingly and wonder when it was their turn. The folks who tied up their teddy bears.

I don't think any other model makes sense, really. Even the most committed Freudian who felt sure the trauma model applied to me squirmed when I asked him "Can I change?" and said something about how it depended how firmly rooted my response to those formative experiences were.

His answer was the answer I knew perfectly well myself, but he couldn't say out loud, because to him it was a sentence of perpetual brokenness or abnormality: If you have to ask, the answer's "no."

It's possible for the two models to be complementary: This is your orientation, and you have it precisely because of past trauma.

But the thing is: if orientation is orientation, why care where it comes from? Think of the conservatives scrambling to get people into reparative therapy for homosexuality. It matters where this comes from because if it is a mental health problem, one common mode of talk therapy is to work through past issues. It matters because what they've got is a model like the trauma model: work your issues with Mo or Dad out and the gay will go poof.

But if gayness is an orientation, where it comes from is an interesting question, but not a vital one. Humanity is diverse, and that's that. If it's biology, well, so are a lot of things, from eye color to handedness. We stop caring why, because why is not the important question.

And that's the thing that many haven't gotten to yet with SM. Even when people do respect us, there's this idea that asking why is appropriate. It's the sort of thing for which a reason is needed, whether it be trauma or being spanked as a child or the influence of patriarchy or any number of other odd theories people come up with.

When people ask me why and I say "I neither know nor care," particularly in certain feminist circles, this is taken to be "compartmentalizing" a part of my life and not exposing it to useful or necessary scrutiny. But if I asked these women (as the case may be) "why are you straight?" or "why are you queer?" the answer, I'd bet, would not be a thoughtful discussion of social factors. A truly committed "radical" might admit some of it is socially constructed, but for most people, in the end, the answer is "I am."

And that's my answer, too. I am because I am. I don't have to know why, because it's the wrong question in the first place.

Seeking Your Writing

Wed, 19 Sep 2007 04:09:14 GMT

Introduction

I am starting work on a book that is basically a celebration and exploration of receptive penetrative sex and looking for submissions. I would like the book to be diverse in terms of input, so I would like to include a range of biological sexes, sexual orientations and ages. Invite your friends! As long as you enjoy vaginal or anal sex of some kind (fingers, dildoes, carrots, dick, whatever) you're good. You can e-mail me at

lesbianmafia7@aol.com

to submit something or ask questions. Please include your primary country of residence and state/region and biological sex (to let readers know what your perspective is; MTF or FTM is fine). You can use whatever name you want on your submission. If you don't pick a name, I will make one up for you. If you use a fake name, try not to make it too common or add a last initial so I don't end up with twenty submissions under the same name. Let me know if you specifically want your full, real name added to a list of contributors (which I will acknowledge somewhere in the beginning of the book). This can be kept separate from what you submit if you don't want people to know which discussion is yours. You can change your mind about submitting at any time before the book is done; contact me and I'll simply leave it out.

Criteria

You may write in a conversational tone, but please use your best formal writing skills (paragraphs, complete sentences, etc.), and proofread and spellcheck what you write. Take your time writing (anytime within the next three months) and make sure you've said what you want to say because it will be rough on me if a bunch of people want to rewrite submissions. Give what you write a title (this is to help me organize and probably will not appear in the book). The work can be as short as you like, but anything over a couple of pages is probably too much. It can be explicit but try not to write something that reads like porn (i.e., write "sex," not "fucking" unless you are specifically discussing language). If you use a quote or idea from someone else's work, use a proper citation (give the person's name and the book, magazine, etc. the quote came from).

The content is mostly up to you, as long as you discuss how things make you feel (physically or emotionally) and what things mean to you. This is important: Make what you write as individualized as possible. It should scream, "THIS IS ME." That means being specific about your feelings, tastes, the way you think, how things have influenced you. Dig deep, ask yourself, "why do I...?" You don't have to come up with a definite answer, just explore. Don't write something shallow, common, or obvious. Use lots of descriptive terms and phrases where possible. Feel free to talk about experiences, but follow them up with "this is why I feel this way/this is how I see the experience/I'll never do that again/etc..." i.e., something meaningful, not just telling your history. PLEASE include discussion of any issues you feel comfortable with that make your experience/perspective unique: having had sex young, transsexuality, being an abuse survivor, being post-menopause, being a sex worker, being disabled, etc. This book will take a primarily positive outlook on sex, although it's fine to discuss being changed by/challenged by/overcoming negative experiences of any kind (crappy urologists/gynos, clumsy first times, etc.). Once again, be specific about what you think/thought or feel/felt. Think of this as teaching readers how you "tick."

Here are some ideas, but remember to discuss these or other issues only if they have had an effect on your experience/perception/etc. of receptive vaginal or anal sex (that means that if it's not really important to you, leave it out):

how things have changed with age/liking things you didn't like before
discuss things in the context of feminism, psychology, queer studies, etc. (if you have advanced academic knowledge of these subjects, please write with a general audience in mind. this sort of writing also requires greater attention to logic; make sure that you back up any academic arguments you make with good evidence.)
the perception or "value" of virginity
the role/effect of morals, your personal ethical system
relationships or communication with any partners
ostracism/invisibility/isolation within some particular community
any unique ways you have of having sex
social pressure, misconceptions, or expectations
the specific influence of any books, movies, magazines, classes, etc.

The issues of the following groups of people are of particular interest. If you know people in this category, call them up!

any transsexuals
bi or heterosexual men
butch lesbians
any intersexed individuals
sexual assault/abuse survivors
people struggling with acceptance/understanding of their own sexual orientation
anyone in law enforcement or the judicial system who has had extensive exposure to sexual violence

Your Submission

I may make minor (spelling, punctuation, etc.) changes to what you submit. If I need to make a major change (shortening, re-wording, etc.), I will let you know (I may ask you to re-write portions for clarification; please do so in a timely fashion). You can then accept the change, suggest another change, or decide not to submit at all; if you don't reply within two weeks, I'll consider it to be ok. Once the book gets published, obviously you won't have a chance to change your mind about anything. I can only include clearly expressed writing. Eloquence is welcome but please do not try to be overly poetic. This book is primarily about what others have to say, but it will include some amount of my own writing, in which I may do organizational/FYI type things such as comparing and contrasting things that different people say, mentioning related cultural phenomena or current events, etc. I will not be academically analyzing anything anyone writes in terms of psychology, sociology, etc.

Thanks.

"I may just be a prudish old lady, but I don't like the idea of teenage girls having boyfriends"

Tue, 18 Sep 2007 20:49:27 GMT

...said I to my boss today.
The context was this: I work as a mentor to small groups of high school students, helping them gain leadership skills and become more involved in their community. I was talking to my boss about a particular young girl who I thought could benefit from our program and would be willing to commit to it. I was listing her various qualities and describing her situation: she's responsible, hardworking, intellectually curious and seems genuinely interested in doing good things in her community, also she and her (somewhat older) boyfriend are attached at the hip. This worries me because.... (see above)
So, in keeping with my style of saying provacative things and then wanting to parse to death every little meaning of that provacative thing: Can we talk about young women, romantic relationships and the heartbreaking tendency for young women to loose themselves into the identify of BlahBlah's Girlfriend.
What forces in our culture create this pressure for young women, with so much to offer the world, to define themselves only in their romantic relationships? What's a supportive, empowering way that we can intervene when we see these situations, whether the women involved are our friends or are much younger women?
Most importantly, how do we do this without falling into the anti-sex, anti-woman rhetoric of "if you respect yourself you won't let boys touch your naughty bits"?
One thing is that I think that telling young people that "nice girls don't", perpetuates this. Girls internalize the messages that only freaks or evil sluts feel sexual desire and so the desire they feel much be True Love.

Young radical feminists (35 or younger)

Tue, 18 Sep 2007 03:30:18 GMT

I'm going to compile an informal listing of radfems under 35 (born post-1970) because academia (or as Mary Daly would say: academentia) thinks or hopes us folk are going the way of the dinosaur.

So if you're a rad fem born 1970 or later, could I get a comment? Just give your username, or a nickname, or your real name. And if you know any authors, singers, activists, etc. who are radfem and under 35, could you give us their name. And maybe a little bio for both categories if you like, or a wee manifesto or whatnot. And do you/your rad fems you list identify as 2nd or 3rd wave?

This is not meant to belittle older radfems in any wany, shape, or form. They're more than welcome to comment too, but please state you're older than 35, so i don't count you as a "young" rad fem.

Also, please post this other rad fem/feminist communities, blogs, etc. Let's get this thang going!

X-POSTED LIKE I'M DRINKING JUICE

From i-D magazine

Mon, 25 Jun 2007 04:00:01 GMT

I'm a newbee and I apologize if I ever argue the obvious here - I'm fresh out of high school so I spent quite a while arguing the obvious there (while not ever daring to touch the views I espouse below, so please bear with me)

I sort of dig i-D for exploring both the female and male aesthetic. I wish this happened more often in other magazines, and I wish photoshoots sexualizing males weren't instantly labeled "homoerotic". It's because us women don't care about looks and need a romantic connection to want sex! (ps: Yes, nudity is not out there for only straight people to enjoy. Thing is, I don't think said homoerotic label is product of a preconception benefitting to either straight or gay people. Feel free to argue, honestly.)

This is an interview with Lara Clifton, founder of the Whoopee Club, a burlesque troupe, from i-D magazine's tissue issue (on sex). I thought it would be interesting for some reason.

ps: I don't necessarily support all of her views

What has stripping taught you?
I learnt that I liked men more than I though I did. It's hard to be intimidated by men once you've done this job - you realise you have this power. You put high heels on and a short skirt and it floors them. All women have it. It made me see men as a lot more vulnerable. Once I learnt how easy it is to get attention I started not to want it in the same way.

A lot of feminists label stripping as exploitative because they claim the women are invariably vulnerable and fucked up.
Striptease has always been a way for women from poor backgrounds to make a lot of money for themselves. Obviously there are people who are fucked up and vulnerable but you get that everywhere.

But now striptease has gone mainstream. There are articles in the Sunday Times by women who strip for their boyfriends, while Kate Moss is pole dancing for Agent Provocateur.
Some of that I find a bit mindless. It seems to me a lot of women want to strip to please men or make a room look at them. It really is just a job and it always has been a job. It really annoys people who've been in the industry in a long time. It used to be very strong-willed people who did it. I don't think it's a glamorous job. It's not necessarily empowering. I don't think Kate Moss on that pole looks empowered. If people are doing it for no reason it becomes tricky. For professional strippers it's a job so it's professional empowerment.

Do you think women don't have that instant visual thing with sex, which men have? They need some kind of other narrative or emotional connection to get turned on?
My friend, the photographer Julie Cook, believes women are conditioned not to be voyeurs. It's her mission to challenge these things. We want to do burlesque with straight men without it being like the Chippendales. I saw this amazing aeralist in a performance of Angela Carter's Nights at the Cirus at the theatre. He has this blue angel moment where they made him into a clown. All these raucous ladies took his clothes off. He was really beautiful and vulnerable.

Would you personally describe youself as sexually liberated?
I guess I'm liberated in my own life. But there are still so many things to fight against. You're not allowed to mention that sexism exists. You do face things everyday, comments from people, the way the world of business is set up. Perhaps this entire burlesque thing is women exploring what they want sexually and out in the open.

What's your idea of sexy?
People who are sexy to me are people who are entirely open and honest. People who aren't following anyone else's idea of what's sexy. Like Leigh Bowery or Annie Sprinkle. People who don't give a shit. You can not give a shit some of the time but it's hard to be like that all of the time.

New blog on BDSM and feminism

Mon, 21 May 2007 18:37:36 GMT

...well, technically not new, but finally content-ful, at least:

Let Them Eat Pro-SM Feminist Safe Spaces

I figured some folks here might want a look.

The blog is, as it mentions, a safe space for pro-SM feminists, so debate on whether feminism and BDSM are compatible isn't welcome there. Keep that to places like this instead ;)

i came back just to crosspost this...

Sun, 29 Apr 2007 17:49:11 GMT

xposted from my lj by request:

Sage, talking about how the word "sex-positive" can seem like an attack or rejection of people who disagree with sex positive feminists, or like an assertion that the speaker is sexually focused, hot, desirous of others' desire:

I think I’d be called a sex-positive feminist by rad-fems, but I’m not sure how well I fit that definition. I’ve been reading around and getting different ideas of what it really means. Personally, I prefer the sound of rad-fem. Sex-positive makes me think of HIV-positive. And, as Lauredhel points out, it sets up the opposing team as sex-negative, which, for me, paints a picture of nuns and eunichs, which really doesn’t fit the image of the rad-fems I’ve met on-line at all. What’s the opposite of rad-fem? Moderate feminism? Mod-fem sounds kinda cool, but that doesn’t really make sense either. And isn’t the opposite of the mods, the rockers?

....I like debating with people without my sexiness being a distraction to the conversation. Luckily, that’s not usually an issue for me. I own a little black dress, but rarely have an occasion to wear it. But I’m not going to the staff Christmas party in a flannel shirt and jeans. I think it’s okay to wear the dress and discuss politics at the same time. And my legs are almost as hairy as my face, which is unadorned save for a stainless steel ring in my eyebrow. So if I’m sex-pos, I’m not the hot kind.

For me, "sex positive" doesn't mean I'm a leatherperson with a high libido -- though I am that. For me sex-positivity is about more than me and what I want. It means it's important to fight for women whose sexuality doesn't fit the standard "box" and is seen as threatening. it's got nothing to do with my opinion of other people sexual choices. (yes, I do have opinions. While I consider it politically important to fight for everyone's rights to have were not have whatever kinds of sex they want, I'm a human being who occasionally--or more than occasionally--gets annoyed, or observes people's behavior and draws conclusions from that. This is part of the reason conflating the political and personal overmuch is a bad idea in my opinion. )

So what does sex positivity mean, if it's not that some people are liberated and some people are prudes? It's a political stance, one that says that a big part of patriarchal control is limiting how and whether women can express themselves sexually. It's a political stance that says that sexual violence against women is one of the many ways that this happens. For me, the key to sex positivity is the claim that its important to create a world in which women's sexual choices -- whether perverts or monogamous suburban housewives or radical polyamorous separatist dykes or asexuals who want to be left alone, WHATEVER as long as any sexual activity that might happen is consensual and caring -- are respected.

But that alone is hardly enough. What I think we must work for is a world where their sexuality is actually valued and appreciated. We live in a world where women's sexuality is devalued and men's sexuality is treated as the norm, if not valorized even more than that . I am sex-positive because I don't believe any kind of liberation for women will be full and complete until our voices are heard not only when we rail against things more "important" than sex, but when our sexualities -- a deep part of who almost everyone is -- are respected as well.

To me, when women speak of their sexuality, it's not simply a bit of personal babbling. It's a conversation that many women are too frightened, embarrassed, trained to be sexually silent or defer to the sexual desire of others, to even have in the first place. When I see women talking openly, honestly, and thoughtfully about their sexual desire, I feel hopeful. I feel hopeful that someday the compulsory boxes, whether they're heterosexuality because it's expected, vanilla sex because it's expected, submission to men because it's expected, will begin to dissolve. The only thing that will enable women to choose what it is they want, anything from love and sex with other women, to female domination, to life affirming female submission, to casual sex, to loving monogamy, to saying no thank you without then being faced with instant guilt or pressure, is for women to be safe choosing for themselves. For women to live in a supportive environment that says what they are is beautiful, honorable, and hot.

Another Blog

Tue, 20 Mar 2007 05:18:33 GMT

I have a sex-positive feminist blog over on blogspot (http://sexpositivefeminist.blogspot.com), and I don't update very often, but seeing as I just have, and am new to this community, I thought I'd make my introduction by saying:

This Is Not Marilyn

(this particular post is about body image/fat acceptance/beauty myth)

Fri, 16 Mar 2007 19:38:03 GMT

i, personally, think this is relative. if the mod(s) don't, i understand if it is deleted.
...
from fatfeistyfemme:

Hey all!

It's time to belly up! I've just launched:

http://www.BelliesAreBeautiful.Com!

What's the #1 body part that most folks are the most heavily ashamed of? What does every weight loss commercial focus on? When you see a no-headed fat person on the news with a voiceover talking about the 'obesity epidemic' - what body part are they showing?

BELLIES!

It's time to show our bellies the love!!! So pull up your shirts, pull down your pants, take a picture and send it in!! All shapes, all sizes, all colors, all genders --

BELLIES ARE BEAUTIFUL!!!

(Please repost if you like) :)
...

Porn!

Sun, 04 Mar 2007 05:11:36 GMT

I'm interested in finding woman-friendly (that is, feminist), quality porn for someone (and hey, maybe once I'm exposed to something decent I'll become a fan too!). I am interested, chiefly, in heterosexual porn, or porn with both men and women involved to some extent.

Any recommendations?

x-posted

Brainstorming and Question

Wed, 07 Feb 2007 05:39:03 GMT

As I've mentioned, I'm working on a paper regarding the images of women in music video. As some (both here and in my research) have linked music video with pornography, I'm doing some reading on the subject -- both for and against. So, forgive me while I bounce a few ideas off of all of you.

I'm wondering if pornography gets a bad gender rap merely because of the act of penetration. If the cultural assumption about pornography was that the women in these images routinely penetrated the men would some feminists be so diligently anti-porn?

The main thought I have with pornography -- and with the images in music video -- is that it reproduces classic, stereotypical, sexist, binary constructions of masculinity and femininity.

A woman is thin, big breasted, heavy make-up, long hair with curls, manicured nails, tight fitting, revealing clothing, high heels. Women use these physical features as a commodity to trade sex for money. Women are also emotional, manipulative and controlling.

Men are tall, have rock hard muscles (abs, shoulders, arms, thighs), a large penis, have long term sexual stamina, have used their talents (intellect, charm, charisma etc) to earn lots of money which they use to seduce women. Men do not "feel" save for physically and are ALWAYS ready for and in the mood for sex.

Those constructions of gender have the potential to harm both men and women by their very nature of being so narrowly defined.

That the sex industry has gone mainstream effects us in the way we strive to live up to these expectations of gender. Sex is no longer a shared act of caring between individuals; it is instead a commodity used to gain money and celebrity. The most important thing one can be is sexually attractive because that gains one the attention necessary to transform a personal act of intimacy into a public act of celebrity.

Thus, when Fergie wrestles with her back up dancers in cake (or ice cream, I'm still not sure what's in that kiddie pool) or dances in a modified girl-scout uniform or when Gwen appears in lingerie or when Ciara crawls along the floor -- it is an act designed to elicit sexual response because being viewed as "sexy" is the pinnacle of success in the sex industry world we live in.

Thoughts? Questions? What am I missing?

cross posted to womens_studies

Is empowerment possible?

Sat, 27 Jan 2007 15:39:45 GMT

Hello, all. I am new to this community, so first off, thanks for inviting me!

Secondly, it was suggested to me that I join this community because of a post I made in womens_studies. So I thought I would ask this group the same questions I posed in that forum.

I am a WGS minor (History major) and I'm working on my final paper for WGS. The topic I'm doing is music video. That women are objectified in music video by hip hop artists is a well-covered topic, what my paper focuses on is why women artists (like Christina Aguilera, Gwen Stefani, Pink, Fergie, etc) embrace and project images of themselves that some feminists would consider objectifying and exploitive. Jean Kilbourne, who does the series Killing Us Softly, views advertising as the new pornography. I'm operating off the basis that music videos are a form of advertising and thus, a form also of pornography.

Some artists view their use these videos as empowering. Christina Aguilera, for example, is very outspoken about the fact that she feels the wearing of lingerie is empowering. Taking control of her own sexuality is a source of strength and feminist power for her. Yet, do the young girls who watch these images of her on MTV walk away with that same impression of personal power or do those images reinforce the idea of women's bodies as commodities to be objectified?

Second question: If you embrace and project images of women (say dancing provokatively in lingerie) that have historically been associated with viewing women as objects, can you in any realistic way truly take possession of those images and claim empowerment?

In other words, is it possible to embrace historically sexist images in a sexist society and claim empowerment for yourself and other women?

(note: there's no judgement here. I actually don't have a clear definition for myself of what "a sexist or objectifying image" is -- that's part of what attracted me to this topic. So, for now, I'm purely after information and opinions and academic analysis. Thanks.)

Sat, 06 Jan 2007 22:18:35 GMT

Hope the new year is finding everyone in good health and good spirits.

My new year has come ringing in with a new mission. I am putting together a 2 day workshop/dialogue on sexuality for UVM students. I am endeavoring to define sexuality as broadly as possible and bring in as many identities and ideas on the subject as possible. As one can imagine, making sure that those who attend the workshop come from lots of sexual backgrounds is impossible, so I’m hoping to bring other identities into the room through the use of narrative.

That’s where you come in =)

If you’re comfortable, I would love for you, your friends, anybody off the street to write a 6-8 sentence narrative about your sexuality. This can include but is certainly not limited to your sexual orientation, what type of relationships you have, or even what you do in bed (but please keep in mind these will be read aloud by one of my students in my classroom… please don’t make them blush too badly). Anything that you feel describes your sexuality is welcome. Please send submissions to my email either in text or an attached word document. My email address is mray@uvm.edu

CineKink in San Francisco - January 18-20

Thu, 04 Jan 2007 23:38:59 GMT

Yerba Buena Center for the Arts presents... CineKink: San Francisco
Cutting across orientations to celebrate and explore a wide diversity of sexuality, offerings in this kink-friendly, traveling showcase range from documentary to drama, camp comedy to hot porn, mildy spicy to quite explicit - and everything in between.

Thursday, January 18th - Saturday, January 20th
Yerba Buena Center for the Arts
701 Mission Street (@ Third)

More info & tickets...

Thursday, January 18th - 6 pm

Free with film/video ticket!
YBCA LIVE: CINEKINK RECEPTION
Join us for a naughty pre-screening reception to kick off YBCA's annual hosting of CineKink in San Francisco!

Thursday, January 18th - 7 pm

CineKink Audience Choice Award 2006/Best Feature Documentary
VICE & CONSENT
Directed by Howard Scott Warshaw, 2006, USA, 56 minutes.
The candor, wit and wisdom of such prominent, long-standing members of the BDSM community as Midori, Jay Wiseman, Janet Hardy, Race Bannon, Cleo Dubois and Michael Blue, help shatter some popular myths about BDSM practice and its practitioners, looking instead at the gifts of intimacy that lie within.

preceded by

THE LINE BETWEEN
Directed by Jonathan Marten, 2006, USA, 24 minutes.
When straight-laced Meg is pulled inside the how-to BDSM video she has rented, she moves from voyeur to participant in an 'Alice in Wonderland' journey through the world of fetish.

Thursday, January 18th - 9 pm

CineKink Audience Choice Award 2006/Honorable Mention
WEBCAM GIRLS
Directed by Aerlyn Weissman, 2004, Canada, 52 minutes.
A funny and engaging visit with four outspoken pioneers of the girlcam frontier. Ducky Doolittle seduces her cyber-fans with a heady mix of fun and sexuality. Ana Voog uses her cam as a 24/7 performance art vehicle. Dionne Lowen quit her job selling cars to open an ethical porn site. And Teresa Senft, adding her notions of biography, privacy and micro-celebrity, declares that rather than 15 minutes of fame, in the future "everyone will be famous to 15 people."

preceded by

DICK HO: ASIAN MALE PORN STAR
Directed by Jeffrey Lei, 2004, USA, 31 minutes.
A look at the "mythical" 70s porn legend, Dick Ho, who was allegedly so well endowed that rumors of a porn industry conspiracy to eliminate any knowledge of his existence persist today. With Kay Parker, Mika Tan and Sharon Mitchell and Annie Sprinkle.

Friday, January 19th - 7:00 pm

"Power Plays"
A collection of works that probe, prod and play with the dynamics of sexual power and fantasy. Who's the top? Who wants to be?!?

THE GREEN ROOM
Directed by Usama Alshaibi, 2001, USA, 6 minutes.
A couple waits in the green room, anticipating their own performance.

RUSH MEDITATION
Directed by Lydia Eccles, 2005, USA, 4 minutes.
A naked woman meditates in the midst of the rush hour throngs.

DOG EAT DOG (IML 2003/Part 3)
Directed by Charles Lum, 2006, USA, 12 minutes.
The nature of performance in sexual identity is explored during the first "sanctioned" Puppy Party event at a renowned international leather contest.

HOW LONG HAS IT BEEN
Directed by Tobaron Waxman, 2001, USA, 7 minutes.
A daddy/boy scene between two female-to-male transmen considers the question of how time unfolds for the submissive.

GUY101
Directed by Ian Gould, 2005, UK, 8 minutes.
A man hears a story about a hitchhiker from the other side of the Internet.

HITCHCOCKED
Directed by David Young, 2006, USA, 8 minutes.
A hot casual-sex encounter stirs up some surprising truths about love, life, online-dating...and danger.

THE QUESTION
Directed by Diana Fodor, 2006, Canada, 4 minutes.
Pondering the relationship between writer and fictional character, which came first - the whip or the word?

POWERPLAY IN RELATIONSHIPS: CHARIS AND ROB
Directed by Gabriele Hoff, PsyD, 2006, USA, 31 minutes.
Interspersed with footage of their S/M play and re-enactments of their fantasy roleplay scenarios, Charis and Rob describe their relationship and the key place that powerplay holds within it.

(trt 80 minutes)

Friday, January 19 - 9:00 pm

"Passion Plays"
Erotic and sometimes explicit, these works dance along the supposed boundary between art and porn, utilizing heat and sex to heighten meaning and further the story.

ROAST RABBIT, PERUVIAN GIRL AND DESOLATION
Directed by Pablo Valiente, 2005, Spain, 12 minutes.
Paco is an old centurion, ready for his last fight, in a world that is passing him by. He might win, because he is Paco...and the rest are little boys.

UNTITLED FIRST PORNO
Directed by Kirby Ferguson, 2006, Canada, 6 minutes.
A boy, a girl and a bed.

HONEY AND BUNNY
Directed by Eva Midgley, 2004, UK, 10 minutes.
One lovely afternoon, in a place not far from you, Honey and Bunny embark on an exciting adventure.

FILTHY FOOD
Directed by T. Arthur Cottam, 2006, USA, 5 minutes.
Eat it. Lick it. Suck it. Swallow it. Relax, it's just food.

HEADSHOT
Directed by Jennifer Lyon Bell, 2006, The Netherlands, 9 minutes.
In a nod to Andy Warhol, depicts an actual first-time sexual encounter via the facial expressions of only one participant, a leather-jacketed young man.

DAMON AND HUNTER: DOING IT TOGETHER
Directed by Tony Comstock, 2006, USA, 46 minutes.
Banned in Australia! Sumptuous and richly detailed, this latest in a groundbreaking series of explicit documentaries about real-life lovers takes a truly intimate look inside the personal relationship of rising adult stars Damon DeMarco and Hunter James.

(trt 88 minutes)

SATURDAY

Saturday, January 20th - 7 pm

CineKink Audience Choice Award 2005/Best Feature Narrative
GOING UNDER
Directed by Eric Werthman, 2004, USA, 98 minutes. Starring Roger Rees, Geno Lechner and Miho Nikaido.
A sensuous and emotionally complex tale of seemingly impossible love between a married psychotherapist and the professional dominatrix he's been seeing for more than two years. With the consent of his wife, they've been meeting weekly in the privacy of a commercial dungeon, where she pierces, prods and ultimately soothes him. Careful protocols about behavior are enforced, but when she announces she's leaving the business and he seeks to see her "outside," the rules and the relationship change.

Saturday, January 20th - 9 pm

"The Best of CineKink"
A special screening of hot shorts deemed the very best of CineKink. The jury-selected awards were determined during the latest run of CineKink NYC, which took place October 17-22, 2006. Program includes:

Best Documentary Short
WANT
Directed by Loree Erickson, 2006, Canada, 9 minutes.
Explicit images merge with everyday moments for a different - and sexy - view of disability.

Honorable Best Mention
DO YOU TAKE IT?
Directed by Kirby Ferguson, 2006 Canada, 3 minutes.
The Wet Spots ask that crucial, musical question...

Honorable Best Mention
HOT AND BOTHERED: FEMINIST PORNOGRAPHY
Directed by Becky Goldberg, 2003, USA, 37 minutes. Includes Greta Christina, Nina Hartley, Sharon Mitchell and Tristan Taormino.
An empowering look at some of the women committed to making and supporting pornography that includes their feminist values, going up against stereotypes and sexism to get what they want.

Honorable Best Mention
HONEY AND BUNNY
Directed by Eva Midgley, 2004, UK, 10 minutes.
One lovely afternoon, in a place not far from you, Honey and Bunny embark on an exciting adventure.

Best Narrative Short (tie)
GUY101
Directed by Ian Gouldstone, 2005, UK, 8 minutes.
A man hears a story about a hitchhiker from the other side of the Internet.

Best Narrative Short (tie)
HITCHCOCKED
Directed by David Young, 2006, USA, 8 minutes.
A hot casual-sex encounter stirs up some surprising truths about love, life, online-dating...and danger.

Best Experimental Short
FILTHY FOOD
Directed by T. Arthur Cottam, 2006, USA, 5 minutes.
Eat it. Lick it. Suck it. Swallow it. Relax, it's just food.

(cross-posted to cinekink and others)

Ipswich Murders and Sex Workers' Rights in the UK

Fri, 22 Dec 2006 18:28:46 GMT

Okay, lots of you will know about the recent murder of 5 street workers in Ipswich, England, and I'm putting my money where my mouth is and co-operating with my MP to try and get him to take action and make changes. And this is where I need your help.

I need to put together a relatively watertight pack to send him about protecting sex workers and allowing them safety and freedom (i.e. basic human rights...) and while I think the best way for this to happen would be decriminalisation (rather than legalisation), it still means that certain entitlements (insurance, health checks, etc) may not be legislated for.

I really would appreciate input from those of you in the know about sex workers' rights and those of you who work directly in the industry (especially in the UK) and what YOU think would be the best thing for me to encourage my MP to do. I want to make sure it's balanced and rational, second-guessing any pitfalls and making things workable and achievable. I shall be looking at literature, academic and otherwise, including that put out by the International Union of Sex Workers and the English Collective of Prostitutes, but if anyone can recommend good reading, manifestos, personal accounts... please comment?

Many thanks to you all.