You know what? This first snippet is of something so short that it's pretty much impossible to swipe a snippet from it. So, here's a link instead. Have at, kids.


This one is just brill. It wins for the year. ( read it under here )

Not far from the Earth, another dark presence has made its way through the stars. Coming as close to the Earth as it’s own moon. It appeared more like a gigantic meteorite with a mind of it’s own. It did not stray that close to the planet, but just enough so as if it wanted to get a good look of the little blue sphere on it’s own. And on top of that meteor was a large crystalline castle. Standing tall and jagged, yet neatly arranged to form a unique formation. One close look and you can see the hint of bright lights traveling down the corridors of violet and blue with a hint of red. Crown-shaped jewels were used as bright torches down these crowded halls of monsters that some may not have imagined seeing before. From ogres to half dragons and even things that were covered in black but had glowing yellow eyes. And not all were monsters. Some were even robotic and mechanic built to look and resemble strongly like humans with large, colorful limbs and sharp bodysuits. Now this may not seem too much like an evil place. But then that’s where the main control room, also known as the throne room, comes into play. In that throne room at the mid-point of the castle sat a man who took charge of the palace like the spaceship enterprise that it was. He wasn’t a really tall or built like a brick house. Hell, he was defiantly no shorty with a gut. This man appeared as an average adult human male with a beige cape scowled over his body with a hood hanging behind so that when he would put it on he would look like the grim reaper with the unique scythe colored the topaz stone. His hair was that of the same color. And rose red eyes that would contradict with his choice of colors. This man was the leader of this organization. His name…

...Was Lord Average Colorblind of the Poorly Spelled Floating Space Kingdom of Bad Fantasy Clichés.

-"The Orion Chronicles" by eric-ryko




( More )

Selenity landed onto the wet ground as it rained on April 12. She was unfamiliar with this place and it seemed kind of chibi for her. She walked around and looked in a window of a store and saw her reflection. “ I’m chibi!!”

-"Revelation Tokyo" by Neo-Princess Serene Eternite

See, being chibi is like being a smurf. You chibi everywhere.



( More under here )

She felt his proficient hands burn through her skin, igniting the desire within her.

"Tsuki no Romansu" by Moon Angel

... That sounds painful.( Read more... )

“I AM earth monarchy, however, please enlighten me o’ sagacious teacher” – Darien sarcastically spat

“More of those long winded words please speak simple English. Anyways, I think the real reason why you are out here is because your parents feared that their kingdom would be totally ruined by an arrogant Terran jerk like you running the show, so they banished you to the ends of the galaxy. To bad they had to choose my home planet. Why that should be a reason for us to go to war with earth.” – Seiya happily spat

Darien’s blood ran cold and several veins popped up around his temples. Seiya was delighted how easily he can get under Darien’s skin and decided to top off his insult. Darien also knew what was going to be next and balled up his fits praying that he would be faster this time.

“What do you say to that......rose boy?” – Seiya smiled

“Rose boy?! That’s it, you asked for it!!!!” – Darien shouted

With that said; Darien recoiled his right fist and launched it towards Seiya’s face. However, Seiya was quicker and knew Darien all too well......

FIGHTER STAR POWER MAKE UP!!!!!!!

And Seiya transformed into Sailor Star Fighter. Darien’s fist stopped near Fighter’s lips, barely making contact. Fighter just smiled victoriously and put her hands to her hips and winked at Darien. Its so fun getting under his skin she thought.

“Can’t strike a female can you your Majesty? Your Gentlemen’s Honor forbids it.” – Fighter taunted

Darein sighed in defeat and folded his arms to his chest. He gave Seiya a very nasty stare.

“Curse you Seiya and your gender switching powers!!!” – Darien spat while Seiya laughed

-"Super Heroes Inc" by DarkParis

Damn tranny senshi wannabes.




( Under Here )

"No," she said with her whole being. "No, I can't let it end this way. I won't let it end this way! We must leave. We must get out of her before the Balance kills me!

-"Spellbound" by Callisto Star.

I love it when typos = porn.



“What happened, guys?” Serena asked.

“Fans.” Mina said.

“Fans.” Raye said.

“Fans.” Lita said.

“Fans.” Amy said.

“Fans.” The outer Senshi said in unison.

“Fangirls!” Darien said. Serena threw him down the poop slide.

-"The Sewer" by Fire Gypsy Kitten.

Did I just see someone use the phrase "poop slide"?




Venusian from Hell. Venusian from Hell. Venusian from Hell. Venusian from Hell. Venusian from Hell. Venusian from Hell. Venusian from Hell. Venusian from Hell.

-"Change in the Balance" by... [Surprise, surprise] Venusian from Hell

Ah, the things young authors with large egos will do to up their word counts...

*Flashback*

I walked to the mailbox, looking down to the ground. I had moved there
a week ago, and yet I still didn't have a friend . As I opened the
mailbox, I felt something warm and fuzzy around my ankle. I looked
down and saw a black cat with a crescent moon... birthmark, I guess.

"Aww, how cute." I said, picking up the cat in my arms. As I
grabbed the mail, I stroked the cat's fur, talking to it softly. "You're
a cute little kitty, aren't ya? Do you have an owner? Well, you don't
have a collar, so I'll let you stay with me for a while. Mother loves
cats, and Daddy WILL listen to mother, so I guess I'll keep you for a
few days."

It meowed. I smiled a little.

*End Flashback*

-Love Locker by Azn Angel

I love their use of first person mixed with third person sort of writing. And Usagi's mother so has her father whipped. Isn't it great how randomly opening up ASMR stories allows you to find all sorts of.... "interesting" things?

Her mother, Ikkuko, came in. Walking over to the window, she looked out, before glancing back at Usagi. "I take it that you have decided?"

Usagi nodded. Ikkuko looked at her. "Usagi, my lovely daughter, I don't understand how you could possibly have any magic in you, but this is something you couldn't possibly pass up. I hope you made the right choice in agreeing to study."

Then, the mother came up and hugged her. "Good luck."

Usagi smiled. "Thank you, okaa-san2."

-"Potter and Tsukino" by Serenarey Chiba

Hello, Mother #2! (Yes, I know that it's the author's way of writing annotations, but it just doesn't work.)( More Under Here )

Hi, my name is Chibiusa, but I'm sure you already know that. Before Sailormoon fans start pelting me with stones, let me explain myself, and what I am here for. I know many people in the SM Fandom loathe me, and simply wish I would a) stab myself to death b) jump off a cliff or c) choke on my own pink hair. The mere suggestion of this makes me cry, even though I never show it to the public. Mum never allows me to do so, because according to her, it is 'not a ladylike behaviour to do so'. But like every other 900-year-old child, I weep because I have no real friends except for my teddies and I am horribly abused by my mother who practises witchcraft and lives in a cottage made of candy –

I'm not supposed to digress though, because it's not a ladylike thing to do so.

--"Your Guide to a Better Chibiusa" by Quibbler

Actually, this was pretty amusing and rather sensible. I still have no love for the Yamhead, though.



( These are very long, so I will cut. )

"I spent all night trying to think up a way to ruin Raye. I know what you’re thinking, “Ruin Raye?!? But she’s your best friend! Why do you want to ruin her?” Because she has messed up my life in more ways that one. Sure, I’ve agreed to let breaking my brothers heart(she dated him and dumped him in one week), borrowing (more like taking without asking and then never returning) my clothes, and calling me fat (which caused me to almost become anorexic) slide. But I will not let her get away with stealing Yura! Yura is my boyfriend for crying out loud! What kind of friend steals her other friend’s significant other??? I mean, I saw them kissing in the Chem Lab, and then he dumps me, and now he’s dating her. I saw her lay that kiss on him (Much to his disapproval)."

--"Diamond in the Rough" by Littleaznangel

Repeat after me, folks: "What. The. FUCK?"


"'Chill out, Meatball Head,' he replied defensively, not liking the feelings of guilt her words stirred in him at all. 'I was only teasing! Ya don't have to blow a gasket! Jeez!'

'I can blow anything I darn well please!' she snapped."

--"Out of the Blue" by Stormlight

Regretfully, the author fails to live up to this early promise.


"Mamoru pressed his lips against Rei’s and they kissed passionately. This calmed down Rei a bit, but as he pulled away, she whispered seductively in his ear, 'Make love to me, Mamoru.'

He widened his eyes, and looked stunned at Rei. They hadn’t ever talked about sex yet, and he hadn’t even done that with Usagi then either. He always assumed Rei wanted to wait until marriage to do that.

'Rei, you’re upset. You’re not thinking clearly enough,' Mamoru tried to reason with her.

It didn’t work, and Rei only pulled him closer to her and said, 'Onegai, Mamoru. I need you. Especially at a time like this...'

'But what if you get pregnant? And you’re still a virgin,' Mamoru said, trying to make Rei see the reasons why they couldn’t, not now.

But seeing Rei’s vulnerable and weak state only made Mamoru question whether or not they should. Finally, sighing and picking Rei up, he carried her to his bedroom and closed the door behind."

--"Faded Harmony," by AnimeManiaGirl

*clang*

Do you hear that? That's the sound of anvils falling on my head.

Serena frowned, "today is mine and Darien's 9 month anniversary!" Serena said hastily, " But he isn't her! He should be here!" Serena got her pouty face out of her special pocket. (Its invisible!)

-"A New Princess" by Princess Athelia

Sometimes, words can't do a goof-up justice.

**************************

"Oh my god! I am so sorry Jedeite! I thought you were an enemy!" Raye gasped, kneeling down to Jadeite's side.

"...It's ok. I deserved that." Jedeite replied, trying to sit up.

"No shit! You're five hours late, Jedeite!"

"I was in my car and on my way, but my car blew up and then I got lost and didn't know where to go! I ran as fast as I could, but then I was attacked by ninjas and they nearly killed me, but I found a rock on the ground and used it like a boomerang and threw it and it hit all of them! Then I was attacked by some giant garble and-."

-"Fire Bird's Tears" by DarkFirePanther

Ladies and Gentlemen... Welcome to Excuse-Making 101. My name is Jedeite and I'll be your professor for the rest of the semester.

Well, first thing's first. Time to bring over all the old stuff from the website. It's a LONG list, yo.

( It's all under here )

Hopefully, keeping this in a comm will keep this sucker a tad more current. It's a lot less trouble than constantly going in and re-editing the old list.