Glinda looked a mite teary as everyone assembled for the class. "Students, thank you for such an amazing semester," she began, "and welcome to our guests. I hope everyone has enjoyed their time in my class, and I look forward to your presentations. Let's begin, so we can all enjoy the weekend a little sooner!

"Oh, and don't forget about the snack table!"

[OCD is FINALLY up, SP likely due to the HOMGWHOA storm in my area]

"Right," Glinda said, "performances are next week. I look forward to what you will show for each of your pieces. Today you will have free time to work on your project, and ask me questions about it, if you so desire. Please work quietly, and take as much of the food as you like."

Glinda had gotten creative today, and all the food and drinks were items that were referenced in songs: cherry Coke, slider cheeseburgers, canned peaches, candy, pizza and pasta fazool.

Yes, she had no bananas.

[OCD up!]

"You know that little piece of paper that I handed around at the beginning of the semester?" Glinda trilled, the happy turned up a little too high, as everyone shuffled into the workshop room. "Well, forget last week. And this week. What I want you to do is this. First, take a popcorn ball-" which were roughly the size of meta for Garfield after a lasagna binge- "from this tray. Second, a glass of iced tea from this one. ( Third, listen to the lecture. )
[OCD is up!]

Glinda had a stereo system set up, along with iced coffees and raspberry cheesecake brownies. "Welcome back, everyone," she said, cheerily. "Today, we are going to be discussing music and mood." She began walking around the students, while continuing on.

"In the movies and theater not that I would know anything about that last one, music is vital. When a character is not speaking, music sets the tone for the scene. In horror films, it sometimes acts as a warning to the audience- beware, for the killer is about to strike!" She leaped at the nearest student, to give them a jump, and then laughed. "In other spots, it can establish the tone of a location." She paused. "For your assignment today, you are going to listen to three pieces and write down the three feelings or emotions that you experienced while listening. After everyone is done, we will discuss the pieces, and why one person may have felt one way while another felt completely different." She tapped her staff on the ground and headphones appeared in front of everyone. "Let's begin."

[OCD up in a moment and if you're at work and your computers aren't allowed to access Youtube, the activity will have to wait until you get home]

"Welcome!" Glinda, like last semester, had handwavily sent out a notice that class would be held outside. "Welcome to Self-Expression through Music. I would like to first apologize for last week- I came down with a stomach bug and decided that we could stand to miss one class this semester." She gestured towards a table. "If you were with me for the last workshop, you know that I usually bring baked goods and lemonade to class. You'll find them over there."

Once everyone had settled in with their snack, Glinda began again. "Now, first things first, introductions. I am Glinda Upland- but please, call me Glinda. Your TAs for this semester are Peyton and Robin." She gestured to each, so their classmates knew who she was talking about. "And as soon as we're done with introductions, we'll discuss the reasons why people listen to music. You!" She pointed to the first student on her right. "Start us off, please."

[OCD up, expect a little SP from Glinda]

Pip Bernadette - B+
D'anna Biers - A-
Martin Blank - A
Callisto - A+
Boone Carlyle - B-
Bridge Carson - A
Angela Chase - A-
John Crichton - A+
James Ford - C+
Jake Gavin Jr - A-
Skank Zero Hopeless-Savage - A
Lindsey McDonald - A
Cameron Mitchell - A
Isobel Stevens - C
Chloe Sullivan - A-

Ted was bouncing when everyone showed up. "Welcome, little dudes! Today is field trip day! We're gonna be going to three different places, and it'll seem like a longer amount of time, but by Fandom time we'll be back by the end of class. This is my most excellent friend, Rufus!"

"Greetings my excellent friends," Rufus said with a slight nod from behind his way-too-cool glasses. "This may look like a phone booth, but it is in fact a machine that can transport us through time, space and the occasional universe. It's been modified so that the outside looks smaller than it is inside. If you'll step this way, we can get going."

Location 1 - Octopus' Garden
Location 2 - Coruscant
Location 3 - San Dimas in the most excellent future

[OOC: All are available for slow play. My apologies for not getting these out sooner. Have fun.]

"Afternoon dudes!

First up, performances! You all totally get to perform your personal theme songs. After that, you can ask me any questions you want about the field trip tomorrow. Because of the mysteeeerious nature of time travel, we'll be gone for what feels like two days to us, but in Fandom time we'll be back by the end of the lesson. Your final will be a short piece on what you've learned so far due next week whenever you get it done. Oh, and dinner while we're gone is totally on me!"

[OOC: Handwave if you wish! And here's tomorrow's first destination for slow play.]

Today there is punch and pie.

"Afternoon dudes! Last class you learned about personal theme songs. Today you're gonna work on your own personal theme song! You can talk to each other to get ideas if you want. Come up with a short jingle to use to represent you. Have at it, dudes! Or, uh, you can just have it done by next week and go do pre-prom stuff. Be sure to sign in!"

[OOC: Sorry it's so late!]

Yay food. There's a smorgasbord of food to choose from today.

"Afternoon dudes! Today we're learning about personal theme songs. Every superhero or regular hero or even minor character who died in season one but had brief recurring appearances has one. Let's look at a few."

Ted plays several opening credit sequences from various superhero TV shows.

( Bitterwoman )

( The Flying Rodent )

( Wormhole X-treme )

There are also snippets from Really Strong Guy Who Can Fly, The Ambiguously Gay Duo, Radioactive Man (from the previously unreleased movie soundtrack), and Orgasmo ("Now you're a man! A manny manny man!").

"Okay, so. Personal theme songs represent the person they're about. They're totally your musical resumes. So talk about some of the theme songs you know of that are the most triumphant."

[OOC: And remember to meta any shows/movies/characters you use.]

[OOC: Drinking game. Drink every time the word 'care' or 'caring' is mentioned.]


Ted's absent again. What a surprise. This time there's an animate furry pink bear standing at the front of the class. She has a rainbow on her white belly.

"Hello class!" the bear says cheerfully. "My name is Cheer Bear and I'm a Care Bear! You might have heard of Care Bears where you come from, or maybe you haven't. Care Bears care about boys and girls like you. We live in a secret place called Care-a-Lot where we love each other and keep an eye on the world to make sure everyone's caring for one another. Care-a-Lot is a wonderful place. I think you'd all like it.

Your teacher, Professor Ted, asked me to come here to tell you about the music from Care-a-Lot. Oh, we do love to sing! Music can make people so happy! It can really cheer them up when they're feeling down. You know you can give someone some music and it can really lift their spirits showing that you care for them.

In Care-a-Lot, we have lots of different songs about how much we care about each other and how much we care about the world. Some of the most famous songs are called Care-a-Lot and Home is in Your Heart and Nobody Cares like a Bear and When You Care, You're Not Afraid to try and In A Care Bear Family.

Even boys and girls like you can be part of the Care Bear family. I'd love for you all to become my adopted brothers and sisters!"

Cheer Bear rushed forward and hugged the nearest person's leg. Unfortunately, it was Callisto. "If you have any questions you'd like to ask me about music from Care-a-Lot or Care-a-Lot itself or Care Bears or caring, I'd love to hear from you because I care!"

Yep, she's still clinging to Callisto's leg.

This week the class is back in the music classroom. It's Krazy Taco week again and there are assorted bits of Mexican food around the place for your culinary pleasure.

"Afternoon dudes! Before we start, I have an announcement. We're totally going on a field trip in the last week! Most unfortunate, but you're not gonna miss any of your other classes. It's on April 28 - that's a Friday - and we'll leave during normal class time. Now dudes, this is a special field trip. We're gonna be travelling through space and TIME with the help of my most excellent friend, Rufus, to visit some moments of musical significance. So if you have any ideas about places or times you'd like to visit, let me know after class. Anyway.

Short class today. We're gonna watch some cartoons. Listen to how the music totally gives away what's going to happen next. If only real life had background music, dudes. Watch the cartoon and then talk about what you'd do if you had background or 'danger' music in your life to tell you how things were."

As per Ted's email, Music 201 is held in the Danger Shop today.

The Shop is set up to look like a post-apocalyptic wasteland junkyard.

"Afternoon, dudes! Today we're learning about music made after the world has gone boom. Even members of a human resistance need music. Today's gonna be a hands-on lesson, so pick a place and go explore."

Hmm. Ted isn't here. However, there is a large, hulking man with a strange forehead and only one eye standing at the front of the class in bulky garb. It looks like he's waiting for someone to show up. Better come in, eh?

Mind the food on the table. There are bowls full of Klingon delicacies, such as live Gagh (squirming serpent worms), Rokeg blood pie and blood wine. Yes, the blood wine is alcoholic and very strong. Someone forgot to tell Martok that alcohol wasn't for the kiddies...or they were too scared to tell him.

"Nuqneh, pe'el students," Martok greeted. "I am Martok, head of the house of Martok." He spoke slowly, but with a commanding voice. "I am Klingon and your esteemed teacher, Ted, son of...uh...Captain Logan, invited me here to instruct you in the ways of the Klingon opera. Many outsiders do not appreciate the fine art of the Klingon opera." He leered at the class with his one eye. "Do not fall victim to such weakness. Klingon opera is an art that shows the true strength of the warrior through his voice."

Martok burst into song without warning.

Kak-lah... Kak-lah ...
Kah-pool-AYYY-do-la-kak-lah...
Yoh boo la to dah...
Yoh boo la to da...
Ah... do ro may... do ro may... do ro may...
do ro MAY de lat so may...
Uh clop-doh... uh gah...
Uh clop-doh uh gah dor...
Uh clop-doh... uh gah... dor ray... dor ray... dor raaaaaay.


"Klingons sing of battle and honor. Any day may be a good day to die, and a warrior must sing with his heart and his soul to show his true worth for when that day comes. Now you may ask questions."

Ted waited for everyone (or at least almost everyone) to show up. He was dressed like Friar Tuck. Once everyone was gathered, he led the way out into the woods. There was a small campfire set up with logs around it for sitting on. Set aside was a pile of marshmallows and sticks. There's also a plate of roast pork and crackling and a few big jugs of cider (non-alcoholic of course) with some mugs to go around.

"Help yourselves, dudes," Ted said and started handing passing around the food and drink. "A lot of places in the multiverse are still totally medieval. A lot of medieval music is made around the camp fire, because that's where medieval dudes eat and drink and party on. A lot of medieval music is all about singing stories instead of telling them, because it's easier for people to join in and make stuff up and make it interesting.

The stories are usually about these babes in distress who prick their finger on a wheel or lose their really expensive shoes. Sometimes they're about the local action heroes, the Eastwoods and the Stallones of the medieval places, like dudes who can pull knives out of rock and dudes who wear tights and roam around the forest looking for fights and steal from the rich dudes and give to the poor dudes and get the girl, even if she does have a chastity belt on."

Discussion: "No discussion today dudes. If you wanna sing camp fires, totally go for it. Enjoy your marshmallows. Anyone want a s'more?"

On the round table, there was an assortment of food from a little place called Hobbiton in Middle Earth. On the board there was an altered map of Middle Earth.

The re-labelled map reads:

Hobbiton/The Shire: Little furry dudes
Moria: Heigh-ho dudes
Rivendell: Pointy ears dudes
Mordor: Bug-eyed dude
Isengard: Slimy dudes and Christopher Lee and wizards
Helm's Deep: Bad place to hang out
Gondor: Butch dudes


"Afternoon dudes!" Ted greeted. "I heard about the kazoo stuff from last week. Most excellent. Today we're learning about this place called Middle Earth. Well, their music. They don't have cars or planes or time-travelling phone booths or anything to get around, so they have to walk or ride horses or sail everywhere. It takes a long time. And most of the time they're either too busy fighting or eating or walking to make new music all the time, so they keep to the same few songs and then just modulate them or use the same theme and make an 11 hour soundtrack really long tunes out of the few ideas they do come up with. Then they just keep harping on the same idea over and over again, and it turns out really long, so they can hum to it on their really long trips. Seriously dudes, it takes like a week to walk to the mall for them."

Discussion: "No discussion on this today unless you want to dudes. But something different. If you could meet any musician-type dude or dudette or go anywhere to any musical performance in all of the multiverse, where would you wanna go? Who would you like to see? Enjoy the food, dudes!"

John's at the front of the classroom today.

Junk food: Potato chips, cookies, Twinkies, Ho-Ho's, and other assorted goodies
Topic: Music in a Pinch
Professor: Bridge and John!

"Hey guys. Professor Ted's out today so me and Bridge are running the class."

On a large table near the junk food, there's a table full of kazoo's.

"Pick a kazoo up off the table. You can keep it. Today's topic is music in a pinch. This is your only instrument, these are your song sheets. Play as best as you can and let's see how well you guys do when creating music in a pinch!"

[OOC: I could have sworn I posted this. Maybe it was a dream. If it was, I really need to get a life and stop dreaming about posting FH classes.]

Junk food: Donuts.
Topic: Music from Melmac.
Professor Ted: Probably hungover.


"Afternoon dudes. Today we're talking about music from a most rocking planet named Melmac. Melmac's national anthem was "Dance till you drop" by Homer T. Swipe. The Melmacians were a totally musical species. Also, when they go to college, they have to sign up for 63 years. Combine a long college life with a naturally rocktastic group and you've got some most excellent music from Melmac."

Discussion: "If you were stuck in school for a long time, what kind of role would music play in your life? Would you start writing music yourself to pass the time? What kind of lyrics would you use?"

Today's junk food of choice is...uh, well, whatever it is it's green. Every piece of food laid out is green. Even the completely non-alcoholic drink container is green. So are the cups. Mm green.


"Clothing is a totally important part of any musician's gig. Not only is the image like the most important thing other than the music, clothes can also help with the music itself. There's this place called the Labyrinth and I talked to this dude, Jareth, who used to be a teacher here. He controls all of the music in his Labyrinth. How does he control music over a whole place you might ask? And if you might ask that, then I might tell you that it's all in the pants."

Ted snickered, then sobered. "Uh, not what's IN the pants. I meant the actual pants dudes. See, Jareth wears these really tights pants and he says that it's the source of all of his power. I think he might have been high...uh, on life little dudes, drugs are bad mkay...but that's what he said anyway.

Today's talk thing is about how clothes make the music. If you had to pick a piece of clothing that would make or break your performance, what would it be and what would it do?

Oh, and anyone who did wear tight pants today totally gets bonus grades. Feel free to strut, dudes."

Classroom: Apparently unscathed.
Sea Shanty Assignment: Apparently forgotten about.
Professor Ted: Apparently present.
Junk Food of the Day: A wide array of seafood and deep-fried stuff from Lobster Hut. And Twinkies.

Roster.


"Welcome back, dudes!" Ted greeted. "Hope your Spring Break was most excellent. Today we're gonna learn about music from Wizarding England. How is Wizarding England different from normal England you might ask? The difference is that the people who live in Wizarding England are wizards or witches, so it could be called Witching England too. The people who live in normal England are normal. Well, except that royal dude with the big ears. I wouldn't call him normal."

Ted shrugged. "Anyway, Wizarding music is a lot like our music, except they can make tubas explode. They have bands like the Weird Sisters and singers like Celestina Warbeck. Sounds pretty girly to me. So Wizarding England music is girly. Today's most triumphant discussion question is...why?

Why do you think music from Wizarding England is so girly?"

***

After the discussion, Ted dismissed everyone with a reminder. "Tomorrow's class is on the musical benefits of tight pants. Make sure you wear tight pants to class!"

There are various kinds of pizza, fried chicken, candy, soda and cake on the round table. Professor Ted was ominously absent. Instructions were on the board.

'Keep working on your sea shanties. Or don't. Enjoy the food and Spring Break dudes.
-Prof Ted.'

( Roster )

Today's Junk Food: Seafood of all kinds. Most of it's deep fried. There are also rumballs, because Ted figured he'd get fired if he brought real rum for the kids. For himself? Weeell...

"Afternoon dudes!" Ted greeted. "I'm not going to bore you with a lecture today, so I'll just say a few things. We're learning about songs of the sea. Pirates and sailors sing sea shanties and make up tunes to keep themselves busy on those long voyages. After all, what else would they do?" Ted looked quite innocent as he said this. Please don't tell him what pirates and sailors might do otherwise.

Project: "Anyway, this week's classes are for working on a project. Grab a partner or trio and come up with your own sea shanty. The tune doesn't matter. It just comes along on its own. The lyrics are the important part. You've got today and tomorrow to work on it. Have fun, dudes!"

( Roster )

Today's junk food is an assortment of candy, chips, dip and soda.

"Ancient Greek music had a lot of drums and wailing. It's actually a lot like music from the Colonies, but only 2000 years earlier and without the space stuff. But see, Ancient Greece was a lot like the Colonies, because there's a bunch of different people all stuck in the one area. They have their own different cultures and stuff, but they all have to interact with each other, so eventually they get this big, totally excellent area culture music thing with the drums and the wailing.

This is kinda proof that music of the same kind can develop in two totally different places as long as the ways of living are kind of the same."

Discussion: "If you were from Ancient Greece and you had your own tribe of warriors, what kind of music would you use to identify your tribe? Kind of your own tribal theme song. And why?"

Homework: "Find a sea shanty/song and bring it to class next week. Dressing like a pirate or sailor is optional, but totally encouraged."

[OOC: Threads open until Thursday.]

There's a note on the door of the music room today.

"Class is cancelled.

Do some research on Ancient Greek music and come to class tomorrow.

Ted 'Theodore' Logan."

( Roster )

Today's junk food of choice is milk and cookies. There are cookies of all shapes and sizes.

"Welcome to class, dudes. It's Friday afternoon and I know you dudes would rather be going and doing stuff that's all not-class-like, so today's class is gonna be short.

The dudes on the Rim usually don't have much money and have to pack all of their stuff up and spend months in space, like, traveling to their new homes and stuff. And when they're there? It's kinda like waking up in Nevada in summer, only without the casinos and military bases. So there's not really much around to make instruments except wood, and even then it's hard to get a good sound. So they have to pack small instruments that can be fixed and stuff. But even though they only have a small amount of room to pack up in, they still take instruments so they can have music to get them through rough times.

Is that not most excellent of them?"

Discussion: "Say you're going to a new planet or country far, far away to live and you have to take a musical instrument with you to learn and play and have music. You don't have much room. What would you take?"

Ted's in his office in case any students need to stop by, y'know, to ask for an extension on that assignment that was due last week.


[OOC: Today's class is coming as well.]

( Roster )

There is a distinct lack of Twinkies at the front of the classroom today. Instead, there are Twinkies strategically placed around the room in areas that are open, visible and would be easy to expose a would be Twinkie thief.

"Professor Ted's still out and we're still talking about music of the Uncharted Territories today. It's almost had to have discussion on this type of music since we really don't know what's out there and what different sounds we might hear. It could be the same, it could be different, it could be damaging to our ears, it could be beyond our comprehension, and it could really stink."

Today's Assignment: Keeping with our last assignment about describing ourselves to natives who don't know us or our music, today's assignment is to tell the class what musicians or pieces of music do you think natives that have never been exposed to your music before would react best towards? What about the musicians or pieces of music that would garner the most negative reactions?"

"Also, if you haven't already, please turn in your homework from last class period."

"And if any of you happen to see the Twinkie stealer, let me know."

( Roster )

There is, of course, junk food at the front of the room. Twinkies, Ho-Ho's, Doritos, Funyons, doughnuts, cinnamon buns, and bananas. Help yourself.

"Professor Ted's not here today, guys. He left me and Bridge in charge of the class. I would say fear but I'm a nice guy. I really am. Anyway, today's topic is The Uncharted Territories. What's an uncharted territory, you may ask? Exactly what it sounds like, dudes. Places, planets, species, stuff we haven't yet discovered. There's a whole universe out there filled with new and cool stuff!"

Discussion: "Let's say you're propelled into some part of space where no one has gone before. Perhaps you got there by a freak solar flare accident or teleportation or just really bad luck. The natives of said space are curious but wary. You have to explain the music of your world to them in fifteen words or less or they take you to their leader and bad things may happen. How would you explain your world's music?"

"Also, if you could, please hand in and present your interview assignments, dudes. Hope you didn't flake or Professor Ted might turn Professor Ninja on you."

( Roster )

There was just the standard junk food today. No added extras. Ted is at the front of the room wearing a gas mask. Don't mind the heavy breathing and weird sounds. It's a side effect of what he's got.

"I've got, like, the Antarctic giraffe flu, dudes." Voo-ksh. "So keep back or the germs of doom'll come after you. More about Colonial music." Voo-ksh. "They like wailing and strings as well as their percussion. Wailing, strings and percussion. What's with that?" Voo-ksh. "Oh, and the Colonies can travel through space and stuff. I wonder what the acoustics are like on a space ship or a space suit." Voo-ksh. "Since there's no other noise in space, if you had music playing it'd be like really clear, so using stuff that echoes good like wailing and strings and drums in your music would totally add to the effect. So would electric guitars, but these dudes don't really use those." Voo-ksh.

Discussion: "If you were floating through space in a space suit until you ran out of air or burned up in a sun or hit a floating sperm whale, and you could only listen to one song or piece of music for the rest of your life because you're gonna die out there, what would you listen to? Totally feel free to argue with each other about whose choice is better." Voo-ksh.