Religious Feminists-- the soul has no sex

faith_feminists @ 2008-09-12T19:10:00

2008-09-12T18:18:21Z

I made a new community priv_project

which is a place for a group of us to collate and write resources for mainstream Christians to read on how privileges and oppressions play out in Christianity and Christian communities and to provide resources on how privelliges can and should be acknowledged and prejudices worked upon by Christians and in Christian communities.

I'm looking for people who understand the concept of privilege in an anti oppressive frame work and/or have experiences of how that has affected their own lives

any ones welcome to join not just Christians as unacknowledged privilege amongst Christians affects lots of people negatively

troll gone

2008-09-04T23:11:25Z

troll post deleted, troll banned. some people have too much time on their hands.

Religion and the feminist philosophy thereof

2008-08-07T07:29:49Z

Has anyone here ever embraced the conclusions of a feminist philosopher of religion who has deconstructed (allegedly) patriarchal religion and offered a feminist alternative?

When I ask this question, I have in mind people like the following:

Mary Daly, who proposes that ultimate reality be conceived of as be-ing, in which all being participates.
Grace Jantzen, who says that the divine is identical to the world but not reducible to its components (much as I am identical to my body but not reducible to its components, assuming physicalism is true).
Rebecca Adams, who proposes that the highest religious aspiration is to participate in an intersubjective union of God and humans. (Adams identifies God as the Christian God, but I'm including her, because her analysis of many religious concepts is rooted in feminist philosophy -- not in traditional religious texts.)

(There's mention of Daly and Jantzen in the SEP article on the feminist philosophy of religion. Adams's ideas can be found in her paper on creative mimesis.)

While I find all this intriguing, I don't know anyone who embraces these ideas with the passion that, say, a Buddhist embraces Buddhism. (If anyone I know comes close to being an exception, it's me, as I'm rather taken by Adams's ideas, though I could do without the Christian content.) It seems that most feminists with faith would rather embrace a more traditional religion but purified of any taintedness that comes from patriarchy. My question is, Why is that? Do traditional religions offer something that tends to resonate with people -- something that can't be found in the texts of feminist philosophers of religion?

faith_feminists @ 2008-08-06T05:39:00

2008-08-06T11:01:14Z

Hello everyone. I have just joined this community because I'm running into a lot of religious questioning lately and this seems like a group that would be understanding. I've considered myself to be agnostic for the past few years. I used to be Christian, but when I was 14-ish I had kind of a falling-out with the idea of the Christian god. As an agnostic I've never been opposed to the possibility of other religions being valid. I feel like logically I can never really know what's out there, but at the same time, I suppose that's what faith is for. I've considered converting to Islam and Judaism at various points, but I have a few issues with each of them. It was a couple of years later before I really jumped on the feminist train, but feminism has definitely changed my life for the better.

Last semester I took a Women in World Religions course at my university. I thought it would be interesting to learn more about a variety of religions, especially how they related to women. In some ways it made me incredibly frustrated as I realized I could never be fully compatible with any of the religions we looked at (Christianity, Islam, Judaism, Buddhism, and Taoism) -- at least not in their mainstream forms. However, one figure stuck out at me. When discussing Judaism, the figure of Lilith came up. I felt an odd connection to her, and I still sort of do. I can't tell how much of it is simply empathy/admiration and how much of it, if any, is a spiritual connection. I think I've deified her in a sense.

Basically, I'm sort of lost, and questioning whether or not I am really agnostic at this point. I've tried looking into information about mysticism surrounding Lilith, and it's sort of difficult considering (as the wiki article points out) how many different "Lilith"s there are. What I'm wondering is, does a modern organized religion following the Jewish tradition of Lilith even exist? (This seems like kind of a duh -- after all, she is from the Jewish tradition -- but as I understand it she seems to be an example of "what not to be" within Judaism, plus I really have issues with the Judeo-Christian-Islamic god.) She strikes me as a feminist symbol, and a lot of the reading I've done on her tends to agree, so I thought maybe people in this community would have an idea. I'm not necessarily opposed to forming my own spirituality away from organized religion, but considering I've spent the last several years being staunchly agnostic and very skeptical/weary of religion, it would be nice to have an... existing framework to work with, so to speak. Does anyone know of any resources on this subject, or have personal experience?

I'd like to offer apologies in advance if anything I've said is terribly ignorant/possibly offensive? I'm very lost in all this, and it's been so long since I've been in any kind of religious space that it's possible I'm being unknowingly insulting. :/

advice needed on talk

2008-07-23T08:36:42Z

I hope this is appropriate to post here... I have invited to participate in a forum on religion and homosexuality. It's being put on by a local queer group, so the focus is positive. They have someone discussing Judaism and Islam, someone dissecting the traditional New Testament verses, and someone discussing denominational stances here in New Zealand and world-wide. My part of the talk would be about my personal experiences being gay and Christian.

If you attended such a talk what would you want to hear about? About my marriage? My experience in the queer community? Religious community? I don't want to go back over Bible verses as those will have already been discussed, and I would like to avoid "justifying" or defending my life. I especially want to hear from anyone in this group who doesn't think being gay is okay religiously as we anticipate a very mixed audience: people who are gay/straight, religious/non-religious, think being gay is fine/think gays are going to hell, etc.

For the record I'm 28, married (to a woman) for three years, and I'm an American ex-pat in New Zealand. I'm conservative in much of my theology and personal behavior.

When I tried the first meditation from Womanspirit: A Guide to Women's Wisdom

2008-07-10T04:27:21Z

I came across an old copy of Womanspirit: A Guide to Women's Wisdom by Hallie Austen Iglehart in Second Story Books at Dupont Circle. Published in 1983, it was one of the early works to integrate feminist spirituality with the feminist movement, after the author had been involved in both spiritual yoga and feminism and felt torn between them-- because in her experience all the yoga institutions were male-dominated and even downright misogynistic, while feminist groups in the '60s and '70s had no place for spirituality or mysticism. Iglehart spent years feeling "torn, physically and psychically, between my feminist and spiritual selves." By the time she published this book, she must have found a receptive audience, since that era was being invigorated by books like When God Was a Woman and The Spiral Dance. Nowadays, third-wave feminism is naturally more attuned to this integration with women's spirituality, thanks to the groundwork laid by books like these.

So when I rode downtown on the Metro recently, I brought along this book and began reading. It eschews theory and abstraction, focusing instead on personal narrative and immediate experience-- the latter in the form of guided meditations for the reader. So I practiced the first one (p. 14) while riding.

By the time it was done, I was in tears. It went:

Take a few minutes when you can be quiet and undisturbed. Sit or lie down, making sure that you are comfortable, your clothes are not binding, and your breathing is unconstricted. When you are settled, take a few deep breaths to relax. Go over the events of the day in your mind. Then, begin to imagine what your daily life would be like from the time you got up in the morning, throughout the work of the day, until you went to bed at night, if you lived in a world where:

* your family name were passed down from mother to daughter
(How I long for a more direct connection to my maternal line of ancestors. In women's circles conducted by Carol Christ, she has women list their mother's mother's mothers as far back as they know their genealogy. In my case, I know their names only four generations back. When my mother researched our genealogy, she found the male lines better recorded than the female lines. So... this is all we know: I am Joanna, daughter of Ann, daughter of Anna, daughter of Margaret, daughter of Anastasia, who came from Ireland.
You know how Arabic names use patronyms, based on the father's name? When I gave myself an Arabic name, I defied patriarchal convention and made it a matronymic, naming myself the daughter of my mother, for a long-overdue change.)

* the decision makers and organizers of your community were women
(That's what I love about SpiralHeart: the most powerful and respected individual in the community is Raven, who is seniormost of the Crones with her wisdom so respected by the whole community, and thanks to her the Crones form the most influential and cohesive core group of the whole community)

*the religious leaders of your community were women
(Again, SpiralHeart and the whole Reclaiming tradition in general owe more to the work of powerful wise women than any other community I've ever been in... so I'm thankful I've known a taste of what this feels like in real life. Likewise, all four of the progressive Muslim groups I'm with are led by women, which to me is an especially powerful development in the intensely overbearing Muslim patriarchy that has taken itself for granted as normative for far too long now. This is why Muslim feminism is so vital to the fabric of my existence, and I feel so blessed to see this new vision of possibility being born into reality before my eyes.)

*the women in your family and community were looked up to as the wise ones, the carriers of the most important knowledge, and the keepers of the mysteries of life
(SpiralHeart has given me so much to fulfill this deeply aching need in my life... my family is sadly a long way from this... thank Goddess for SpiralHeart...)

*when you are sick you went to the healing women for help
(For many years now, I have been going only to women doctors, dentists, psychotherapists, acupuncture, Reiki, etc. as far as possible... I swear, just being in the care of competent women is enough for me to feel that healing is already underway.)

*when a special event came up, the women of your community gathered together to decide what to do
(I would feel so much more secure and reassured than I do now, knowing the community's life was getting the care it needed.)

When you are finished imagining these situations, note what emotions, fantasies, and other reactions came up to you. You may want to express your responses in writing, drawing or dancing.

It is a well-known psychic axiom that if you begin to act as if something were true, it becomes more possible. Are there ways that you can begin to express the powers you felt in the meditation in your everyday life?
(I was so overwhelmed by the beauty of the vision this meditation brought me, I could not hold back my tears even though I was surrounded by people. I felt loved and blessed that, to some extent, I've already begun to manifest this in my life... I felt deep pangs of longing and yearning for the many ways it hasn't manifested yet... but I want this to be the world my daughters come to know someday. I'm expressing the power of this meditation by writing this in my journal... but I will dance it too.)

Women's Intuition

2008-06-24T01:34:58Z

I was wondering what the feminists of faith_feminists think of the concept of women's intuition.

I realize that women's intuition is sometimes juxtaposed with "male logic" as though there is no overlap of intuition and logic among genders. This is of course completely absurd, as men are capable of intuition and women are capable of logic. My question is not one of absolutes. I know that everyone is capable of both intuition and logic.

Is there anything that female feminists are willing to claim as the legacy of their sex?

Whether that female attribute be physical, mental, emotional, spiritual, or psychological, or whatever else.

For example, do female feminist mothers believe that they have a connection to their children that is beyond what the father of their children could have? The process of conception, pregnancy, and childbirth are obviously biologically reserved for females. The intuitive experiences associated with pregnancy are also therefore reserved for women only.

Can feminists celebrate positive differences between women and men? Does celebration of our feminine attributes negate our claim to our right to equal treatment? I don't believe it does.

what is spirituality

2008-05-30T15:15:54Z

I am putting together a worship service about spirituality and play. Unfortunately [or fortunately!] those two terms are really very broad. What do people think spirituality is, and how are you spiritual? Do you have any thoughts on how play might be spiritual or not?

Thanks!

Progressive Christianity Blog carnival

2008-05-29T16:54:24Z

Myself and a friend just set up a blog carnival for progressive Christians
the home blog is here feel free to submit something or advertise it

Thanks!

Coming Out (as a Christian)

2008-05-19T05:08:13Z

Today, at Borders, I wanted to look for Marcus Borg in the Christianity section but I was ashamed to be seen standing there. Coming out as a Christian is deeply embarrassing. Most Christians don't understand Christianity -- imagine how we look to outsiders! Our (the U.S.) president claims to be Born Again; meanwhile, he authorizes death and destruction in Iraq. Then there's Fred Phelps and his infamous "God Hates Fags" campaign. Add Intelligent Design to the mix and you can see why any right-thinking Christian is embarrassed. It doesn't matter that I'm a nice Quaker, by identifying myself as a Christian I'm responsible for all the sins of Christendom! And I guess, if I’m really honest, I'll admit that I'm a conformist: my friends and professors have no love for religion and see it as (at best) intellectual death or (at worst) deadly folly. It's hard to be the odd one out.

In the end I snatched the book I wanted (Jesus: Uncovering the Life, Teachings and Relevance of a Religious Revolutionary) and ran. Do you have similar feelings of collective guilt and apprehension when you come out as a Christian/your religion? How do you deal?

Question for Jewish members...

2008-05-14T23:49:05Z

This is not a question relating to feminism specifically, so I hope that it is okay to post here. I've looked for the answer online and have not been able to find anything that addresses this situation.

I am Catholic. When I was a teenager I had a Jewish friend who would call me every year at Rosh Hashanah to ask me to forgive him for any transgression that he might have committed towards me during the previous year. Our friendship was pretty troubled at the best of times, so there was a lot to forgive him for, but I always said yes.

The third year this happened, I realized that I was forgiving him for the same things over and over again. He never tried to find out specifically what he had done so that he could make amends, and he never made any effort to prevent the destructive behaviour from continuing.

I've been curious about this ever since. In Catholicism, you seek atonement for specific sins and are assigned penance accordingly (or at least, that's the idea). Is the spirit of forgiveness at Rosh Hashanah likewise supposed to repent for specific wrongs, or is forgiveness sought more generally?

I apologize if this seems like a stupid question, but I've been curious about it for years and have never been able to find an answer.

Using my Kol Isha

2008-04-16T14:13:20Z

"There is so much to reflect on. Why are the imahot missing from our liturgy? And can we change what has been done for generations? Many synagogues now include the imahot in mi shaberakhs for the sick, and in prayer for the soldiers of Israel. Can we look for ways to be even more inclusive? Can we include Miriam's song after Moshe's when we pray every morning?"

-Carol Kaufman Newman
President Jewish Orthodox Feminist Alliance

I have approached leaders in my Orthodox community to ask that women who are being held captive by agunot are included in prayers after the prayers for the Soldiers of Israel and the Soldiers that are held captive. So why not for the women whom are held captive by agunot?

And even provided the prayer:

I was told no.

Why can't we have a women's minyan? And I stress WOMEN's. Even if it is just for a bat mitzvah, we do have two sanctuaries in my shul.

Why can't we have a women's Rosh Chodesh activity or Shiur that is just for women? It is OUR holiday after all?

It has nothing to do with being an Orthodox shul. None of the things I am asking goes against Torah or Halacha.
G-D forbid.

The dream for my shul is:

*Women speaking from the amud.
*Passing the Torah to the women's section
*Women saying Birkat HaGomel
*Prayer for Agunot
*Mother's names in Mi'Sheberach and/or Aliyot
*Women feeling comfortable to go to the front of the women's section to say Kaddish

and really to be a FAMILY oriented shul that promotes having lots of yummy Jewish children, to provide adequate childcare during Friday night services, and ALL Shabbat day services including Mincha, Sludat Slesheet and Maariv. That is key for most women I know.

IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK???????????????????????????

I need answers to my questions. I am not getting them.
Feedback would be much appreciated.

faith_feminists @ 2008-04-11T11:58:00

2008-04-11T15:58:09Z

News from a feminist theology school.

Megan McKenzie next Principal - Centre for Christian Studies

On behalf of the Central Council of the Centre for Christian Studies, co-Chairs Barbara Barnett and Tammy Allan, are pleased to announce the appointment of Megan McKenzie as the next Principal.

Megan will bring vitality and vision to the position. She is articulate and brings a rich background of work and experiences in areas of social justice. A lay person who has had life long experience in The United Church of Canada, Megan models an understanding of diaconal ministry in her approach to education and to issues of justice. While living in Ireland she was associated with the Church of England in Ireland.

Megan's formal education includes a B.A. in Conflict Resolution from University of Winnipeg, an M.A (in progress) in Theology at the University of Winnipeg, and a PhD in International Peace Studies from Trinity College, Dublin. Currently she is lecturer in Conflict Resolution Studies at Menno Simons College teaching such courses as Models for Conflict Transformation, and Conflict and Culture. Menno Simons College is a small Mennonite College associated with the University of Winnipeg, giving her experience in work within a small educational centre as well as connections with a larger university setting. She has served on various committees in her work place including one developing a revised comprehensive curriculum in her department.

Previously Megan has been employed by Project Peacemakers /(Coordinator and Public Educator)/, the Government of Canada /(Project Evaluator for National Crime Prevention Centre)/ and Wolseley Family Place /(Social Researcher and Program Designer)/, as well as having short term positions with Street Connections /(Street Outreach Worker)/, with the Conference of Manitoba Northwestern Ontario /(Vacation Bible School Coordinator)/ and coordinating the University of Winnipeg Women

x-posted to my own journal

Introduction: How Do You Reconcile Being a Feminist When the Majority Are Not?

2008-03-15T00:19:11Z

Hello everyone:) I am new here so I thought I would introduce myself. My name is Jessica and I am of the Wiccan faith-which you may or may not know about since it's not mainstream.

I accidently stumbled across this community to find that it truly resonates with me. I've read many of the posts and decided to join because of how much I relate to all of you even though we all may not share the same religion. It is nice to learn from others and to relate our opinions in decent fashion. I've noticed that is lacking in some of the other communities where no one can find a common ground and put each other down like children in grade school. Lol.

It is hard to find others of a like-mind sometimes so I am glad I came across you. I would love to learn more about your different faiths, what it means to you, and how you reconcile being a feminist when the majority are not.?

~Jessica )0( Blessed Be

Sign the petition to halt the execution of Fawza Falih for "witchcraft"

2008-03-10T04:34:29Z

Please read about the appeal below and act as you are moved.

Saudi Woman to be Executed for Witchcraft Please circulate widely
This appeal has so far received relatively few signature. Please
circulate widely to your contacts.

URGENT: Halt Saudi Woman's Execution for 'Witchcraft'

To Those Who Share Our Concern:

Please join us in calling for the immediate pardon and release of FAWZA FALIH , a Saudi Arabian woman who has been sentenced to death by beheading for the alleged crime of "witchcraft. " As Human Rights Watch has declared, the conviction of Fawza Falih is a travesty
of justice.

A letter to His Royal Highness KING ABDULLAH has been drafted and signed by clergy and members of various faith traditions all over the world. The letter may be read online where you may also sign it. Please do
so as soon as possible at:

http://www.petitiononline.com/AIDFAWZA/petition.html

We would greatly appreciate it if you would also forward this request to whomever else you think will share our concern.

Time is of the essence.

Further information on the case is available at:

CNN Reports Saudi Witch Case
http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/world/2008/02/15/verjee.saudi.witchcraft.cnn

HUMAN RIGHTS WATCH Saudi Arabia: Fawza Falih's Case
Reveals Deep Flaws in Saudi Justice System
http://hrw.org/english/docs/2008/02/14/saudia18051.htm

To read the letter from Human Rights Watch to King Abdullah:
http://hrw.org/english/docs/2008/02/13/saudia18046.htm

BBC News Pleas for condemned Saudi 'witch' http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/middle_east/7244579.stm

HuffingtonPost: Saudis to Execute Woman for Witchcraft
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2008/02/14/saudis-to-execute-a-woman_n_86642.html

Thank you for your help.

Rev. Phyllis. W. Curott, J.D., Assembly of World Religious Leaders

Mike Mohamed Ghouse, President, World Muslim Congress

Rabbi Michael Lerner, Editor of Tikkun Magazine, Chair of the Network of Spiritual Progressives

Gregory Gomez, Apache, Spiritual Leader

Sheila Musaji, Editor, The American Muslim

Andrew Harvey, Rumi Scholar, Spiritual Leader,
Founder, The Institute for Sacred Activism

Dr. Uma Mysorekar, The Hindu Temple Society of North
America

Ellen Evert Hopman M.Ed. Author

Elliott Dlin, Executive Director, Dallas Holocaust
Museum/Center for Education & Tolerance

Dr. Sushil Jain, President, Jain Society of Metro
Washington & Secretary, Federation of Jain
Associations in North America.

Ervad Ratansha Vakil - Zoroastrian Priest - Dallas,
Texas, USA

Ashok Aklujkar, Hindu Community, Professor Emeritus,
Vancouver, Canada

Rev. Dr. Rita Nakashima Brock, Director, Faith Voices
for the Common Good, Visiting Scholar, Starr King
School for the Ministry

Rev. Dr. Todd A. Collier, Presbyterian Minister

Rev. Dr. Kevin D. Huddleston, Episcopal Priest

Rev. Darrell E. Berger, Unitarian Universalist

Noor-ul Amin Ali Son of Jaffer Ali, Pakistan Karachi,
Shia Ismaili Muslim

Naresh R. Shah, Jain Community, Nitro, WV 25143

Rev. S. M. Fox, President, Greater Madison
Interreligious Association, Assembly of World
Religious Leaders

Marylou Ghyst, Unity Church, Texas

Theorists: Women, Cooking, and Faith

2008-02-29T08:48:30Z

Hello! I'm in the process of writing a very big paper and I'm on a search for theorists who have discussed the relationship between women and food/cooking in literature, within the realm of religion and spirituality; or, who have talked about women and spirituality with thought on culinary ritual/expression; or anyone who you think may be of use in exploring these topics.

Thanks in advance. :)

new community

2008-01-18T17:51:02Z

womeninhistory

to discuss and celebrate the women who changed and shaped history

faith_feminists @ 2008-01-18T01:57:00

2008-01-18T08:12:51Z

If you were raised to view God as male (who wasn't,) and later made the conscious decision that this just can't be the case, how have you worked to change your own perception? Is it easy, difficult? Especially if you're Christian, how have you managed?

I've had trouble for a very long time claiming my own spirituality. I consider myself Pagan, but spend much more time thinking about the god I was raised with than my own concept of God. Of course it just doesn't make sense to me that there would be a only strictly male God, but I still can't escape that notion.

"In the Name of Hijab?"

2008-01-04T04:04:20Z

I thought you might be interested in this article:
http://arabcomment.com/2007/in-the-name-of-hijab/

faith_feminists @ 2007-12-28T17:39:00

2007-12-29T00:09:36Z

Hello, I'm fairly new here. Though I'm not Christian anymore, I'm still interested in feminism in the church. I joined primarily to learn, so I'd like to get your opinions on something. I hope it's not been posted before.

http://www.therebelution.com/modestysurvey/browse

This was a survey done on how women in the church should dress modestly. There are statements posted, and the men surveyed were asked to agree or disagree, as well as post their thoughts.

I definitely detect misogyny in much of it, but I'm also curious about the stance from Christian women on how Christian women should dress themselves. And is a man really victim to women who dress less-than-modest? I tend to think not, but where do you draw the line? The side of my fundamentalist Christian upbringing sympathizes with helping men to keep pure thoughts, but I also think blaming women for a man's sexual thoughts is ridiculous.

I guess what angers me the most is the assumption that lust is only a male phenomenon. Can't women be tempted all the same? Where is the forum to discuss women's "stumbling blocks"?

My thoughts feel rather shallow because I'm not of the same faith. To me, it honestly all seems unnecessary. But I'm so curious what the women here think of Christian sexuality in general. What did Jesus mean when he said looking at a woman lustfully is the same as committing adultery with her? Should we really keep our thoughts as 'pure' as this survey would suggest?

Discouraged

2007-12-28T22:07:46Z

I'm slowly coming back to Christianity after twelve years away from it. Feminism is really important to me and I don't believe it clashes with the basis of Christianity.

I'm becoming really discouraged before I even start though at the misogyny in Christianity/christian tradition. Someone over on the christianity said that ending women's oppression was a "petty agenda" and they have all those discussions on a women's place in the church.

I also don't think I would get a lot of acceptance from most kinds of christianity because of my beliefs like not believing the bible is inerrant,

how do you deal with this kind of discouragement? Do you stay in faith communities that have beliefs that are diametrically opposite to yours in some ways?

Coming from the other direction

2007-12-24T01:06:11Z

Hi. I'm new here. I think I'm coming from a different perspective from everyone whose posts I've read here (and I've read a lot of them), but I think you all may be able to help me with some questions I've been having.

I've been a feminist for something like four years now, and I left the religion of my youth about six years before that. I'm now a non-religious atheist, but I'm not content with this. Part of the problem is that I feel a disconnect between me and other people in the struggle; it seems that in the US secularism and atheism are predominantly white middle class male phenomena. I'm currently trying to figure out whether there's some religious or spiritual path that would serve me better. To that end I have a couple of questions:

(1) Is there some reason you find secularism to be dissatisfying? If so, what is it?
(2) Do you feel that your path offers something to feminists that secularism does not? If so, what is your path and what does it offer?

I hope no one thinks I'm trying to bash secularism or atheism. I know a lot of non-religious atheists who are kick-ass feminists, and -- who knows? -- maybe my search will lead me to be an atheist with a better idea of how to incorporate feminism into my world picture. But I can use some stimulation right now, and I think these questions are a good starting place for me.

Opinion

2007-12-21T13:20:45Z

What is your opinion on the statement that a true spiritual teacher never asks for money?

Abortion

2007-12-20T04:33:23Z

I found the following article last week, but only got the chance to read it today

Why Abortion is Biblical
How anti-abortion activists misrepresent the biblical record
http://www.elroy.net/ehr/abortion.html

It was interesting, but I'm unsure what to think of it. Thoughts?

x-posted

A Question about Address

2007-12-18T21:42:43Z

I wonder if anyone else has dealt with this and looking for some advice. Please note, I want to deal with this in a gracious manner.
Whether you're married or not, if you have advice on this issue, I'd appreciate it.

What is the best way to make it known that you do not like being referred to as Mrs. Husband's Name? Especially when both are being addressed so that the woman becomes just the "and Mrs."

My first response is to say, "There is no such person. Especially since I don't even share his last name." But that seems overly rude. Any help?

xposted to my own journal and christ_feminism