Evil Geniuses

evilgeniuses @ 2007-12-01T14:57:00

2007-12-01T22:58:42Z

For all of you evil villains, you might be interested to know that you can buy Uranium on Amazon:

http://www.amazon.com/Uranium-Ore/dp/B000796XXM/ref=cm_cr_pr_pb_i

MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

2007-01-21T02:32:15Z

I am going to hypnotize you all with my evol evol galdor!

:)

evilgeniuses @ 2006-11-02T17:36:00

2006-11-03T02:36:18Z

hey guys i have a question im stuck takign a computer class in night school at a high school and this all way to boring im trying to go on to myspace or aim but its blocked

can anybody show me a code to unlblock or tell me a way to unblock myspace or aim?

please help!

evilgeniuses @ 2006-05-23T16:52:00

2006-05-23T23:52:08Z

ah. i see now how the math works... yeah, the zombie fruit plan doesn't work...

evilgeniuses @ 2006-05-16T10:45:00

2006-05-16T17:46:35Z

does anyone have plans to combat a legion of undead trees, insects/arachnids, and fruit?

maybe firing zombie-powder missiles into the tropics would be more effective than I expected...

evilgeniuses @ 2006-03-22T18:45:00

2006-03-23T02:46:22Z

Greetings everybody. Let me introduce myself. My name is John Vishloff, and I’m an evil mastermind. I was born in Russia more years ago than I care to remember, and my brother and I moved out to Canada when we were young men. Ever since I was a child people had referred to me as being nefarious, which proved to be true; as soon as I had taken on step in my new hometown of Mission BC, I yearned to control it completely and enslave its inhabitants. I started small, gaining the trust of the townsfolk by running a convenience store with my brother and being a foreign craftsman of unknown sorts. There was a minor setback when my brother rebelled against me and led a small militia to thwart my malicious schemes. This so called rebellion was crushed swiftly enough. With this so called DRM (Dlugosh Resistance Movement) out of the way, I moved swiftly to assert complete dominance . I used all my cunning to seize control of the League of Evil, the inner circle of all evil doers in Mission, from the notorious Sebastién Bertrand Hugénot, and established the execrable enterprise Vishcorps. When my leadership was secure, I burnt down the Institute for Paraplegic Blind Orphans, and built my house where it once stood. By this point I had agents in nearly all levels of infrastructure, and I had firm control over the corrupt municipal government, the current mayor at the time simply being my puppet.
I soon began to see that I was becoming old and frail; if the proper steps were not taken, I would die before the complete and utter control of Mission could be accomplished. I used all my knowledge and influence to see what could be done about this. Before long, I became aware of certain manuscripts that were found on the Peak of Leprechaun Mountain, one of which contained the key to immortality. I sent out my head agent to find this manuscript. He failed miserably, so gleefully I tortured him to insanity. I found myself a new younger Searcher, and his youthful enthusiasm proved to be the missing link; it wasn’t long before he knelt before me and handed me the prized manuscript written by a crazed hermit named Miles years ago. With the help of my Seer, Squeauttée Rouselle, I unlocked the secrets hidden in those worn pages! Scoff if you wish, but you will pay for for your mockery in the blood of your children, and your children’s children, because I, John Vishloff, am now immortal, and I will continue to haunt this world until it has fallen into the darkness of the eternal Abyss!
With Death defeated, my victory seemed imminent. My Army was nearly ready to be deployed, and Mike, the Herald of Ultimate Evil, was prepared to declare my complete domination and control to the oblivious residents of Mission, when the blasted Order of Two came around and started to complicate my plans! These boys, while young, are nearly my equals in terms of cunning! They are empowered by the divine being Trashcat, and are always one step ahead of me and all my sinful schemes! They have defeated all my assassins, bested my greatest agents; they’ve even reinstated the militia called the DRM, in honour of my brother that I slew mercilessly years ago. They’ve discovered all my compounds and watch towers. Even my secret training facility and the construction of my Fortress of Negritude is not unknown to them and their accomplices! They have the potential to ruin my decades of evil planning!
if you have any information on this so called Order of Two, or any ideas or helpful tidbits on how to rid myself of their existence, you can contact me at league_of_evil69@hotmail.com, or through one of my henchmen, Shivloff, my Second-in-Command; Gloshdov, my Estonian minion who is the handler of Advor the Annoyingator, my secret weapon, or the Talking Catfish, who you’ll recognize quite easily as he is the only catfish in the world who wears a suite and smokes.

Malevolently yours,

The Nefarious John Vishloff

*evil grin*

From Hungary

2006-02-26T14:32:33Z

Hello. I've been trying to take over the world from a hellish little village in northwest Hungary for about four years, but sadly, my worthy attempts still haven't achieved anything resembling success.

I like to have animals carry out the drudgery of my mighty plans since they are often underestimated by humanity and the threat of rebellion against me is minimal. I had all the chickens and swine in my neighborhood brainwashed into becoming my faithful slaves and spies. But then, winter came and the swine were slaughtered for Christmas as Hungarian custom dictates, and all my chickens were killed by fiendish government people who were convinced the birds were carriers of the bird flu.

I'm at the beginning again. I don't know where to go. I live in a pit with only 40 channels on TV, over half in a language other than Hungarian and English, which are the only two I am capable of fully understanding.

What should I do? It was always my dream to group the world's most loathesome people into an enormous prison in the middle of the Sahara desert where I could mock them. I see this dream slipping away... I really want to see Robbie Williams, Ann Coulter, Jerry Falwell, and Randall Terry behind bars along with illiterates, the wilful ignorant, and people who don't wash their hair. I want to witness them all squeal and writhe in agony as I torment them on rebuilt, modernized versions of medieval torture devices.

Wow, that post really made me happy. I feel so much better now. Off to make myself some hot chocolate with those dainty little marshmallows.

evilgeniuses @ 2005-11-29T19:45:00

2005-11-30T00:51:43Z

Yeah, I'm assuming this is allowed since it's a villain headquarters. XD

So... who wants to be affiliated with a "terrorist" organization?
On to my generic message...

___________________________________

Everyone that's interested... I have a wonderful proposal. You should... go sign up on the peta2 website! Yay! That way you can post on the forums, AND get all kinds of leaflets and... (well, let's face it) propoganda to hand out at restaraunts or on the street. They also offer bribes for those who aren't motivated by mere love of animals. Of course, I am self-motivated already, but I figured I might as well take the offerings as I go. You don't have to, though. I probably won't even do that, but... just saying... and, speaking of that, you could always put green_fairy @ alltel.net as your referrer. You could do that if you wanted to. But you don't have to.

(Oh man, I'm high on something I think... I'm just in a strange mood.)

http://streetteam.peta2.com/

Be aware, be very aware...

2005-09-16T19:33:39Z

http://blogsearch.google.com/

Kid makes DIY flamethrower!

2005-08-15T02:00:41Z

http://www.chaffinchshoelace.com/view/2690/

evilgeniuses @ 2005-07-28T00:34:00

2005-07-28T04:24:59Z

evilgeniuses @ 2005-02-02T10:56:00

2005-02-02T15:58:11Z

Is there anyone in this community with a popular Islamic terrorist website? If so, props for this

The Messiah

2005-01-31T19:11:04Z

Nice to see you guys have been keeping a group tailor made for me warm.

evilgeniuses @ 2005-01-04T13:08:00

2005-01-04T18:19:15Z

This poor woman had the remote control to her brain implant stolen. Hard to imagine an implant meant to enhance the quality of life preventing normal life. Makes me think of Johny Mneumonic. Hope it gets returned or the doctors can make a replacement. Found some info on medical implant communication protocols. The weirdest part is one of them is infra-red! It's bad enough that the RF protocol and device can be replicated for under $150. I can envision someone being held hostage via an implant. Will special legislation be passed in regard to wetware hacking?

evilgeniuses @ 2004-12-14T12:58:00

2004-12-14T17:58:39Z

Planning on turning the Earth inside out, just thought I'd give you all a heads up.

cross-posted

2004-12-04T10:12:47Z

hm... plans within plans.
this is going to take a few trillion dollars and a few decades, but it will work and it will provide a refuge for humanity (and the opportunity to lay waste to all the infidels/morons), but the plan is already in the works.

step 1: finish this semester, and keep going until i graduate.
.....
step (very very large number???): establish my own, independant nation colony on/inside the moon.

and i'm only slightly insane tonight!

evilgeniuses @ 2004-11-15T05:05:00

2004-11-15T13:04:02Z

the clown council finds you guilty of performing a lewd act while in the conveyance of a unicycle...

evilgeniuses @ 2004-11-13T20:09:00

2004-11-14T03:11:12Z

pinky_andbrain

A community for Pinky and the Brain!

sherbert

2004-10-25T16:19:53Z

i think there should be the equivalent of mensa tests for evilness

eg

question 6,

what is it that turns you on about animal sacrifice etc

it'd be canny illuminating

Being an evil genius is "hard work"

2004-10-04T19:26:24Z

Programs: 'Evil Genius' Brings Out Your Inner Villain
By Gene Emery

PROVIDENCE, R.I. (Reuters) - They say a genius is never appreciated in his own time. Well, try being an evil genius like me. Most of you readers don't appreciate what it takes to deliver on sinister schemes and dastardly double-crossings.

It takes work! It takes time! It takes money! It means not taking your medication!

Are you listening, people? You think secret bases filled with doomsday devices and instruments of torture build themselves? Wake up and smell the cyanide!

Finally, the brighter bulbs at Elixir Studios and Vivendi Universal have figured it out. They've come up with a new tongue-in-cheek Windows strategy game called -- and I'm sure the head corporate clods wasted a lot of brainpower on this inspired title -- "Evil Genius."

Through the magic of the personal computer, this game lets you build a simulated evil empire and double-cross the henchmen who have come to think of you as a perverted father figure. You bask in the glow of self-righteous slaughter as the latest 007, 008, 00-whatever wannabes get fried, baked, peeled, squashed, diced, aerated, shaken and stirred by your complicated deathtraps.

[Rest of review]

This sounds like a modern version of dungeon keeper, which was rather a lot of fun. Anyone out there given it a try? How does it compare to your real world plans for world domination?

evilgeniuses @ 2004-10-04T14:02:00

2004-10-04T18:08:06Z

I call dibs on Mt. St. Helens, from this day forward to be referred to as Mt. St. Hell

this is a bit off evil...

2004-09-24T14:16:58Z

i have an itch, and i'm looking for a state to punish. normally, i would say france without hesitation. however it has occured to me that maybe some other states also deserve to feel my wrath.

in short -

any suggestions and why?

Open Invitation!

2004-09-10T11:30:54Z

Attention all crazies, psychos, and postal workers!

A new community has arisen! Psycho Central has been created for all of your random musings regarding everything from abstractionalism to barbarism! Um... well, not so much alphabetically, but... *ahem* moving on!

All are welcome to join* as long as you are a free-thinker and not a total butthead. C'mon, where else can you tell people what the voices in your head are telling you to do? Come one! Come all!

*Normal people and my high school history teacher need not apply.

Operation: Splinter Monkey

2004-09-10T10:50:20Z

Alright, so here's an idea I'm working on. Facing an dilemma regarding policing large populations, I've come up with what seems to be an ideal regulatory solution: Green Monkeys. Not just any green monkeys, however, these monkey's will have baseball bats.

Ok, no really, here's how it'll work. I'll appoint Deputies to work with paintball guns. These paintballs will have special chemicals that show up under certain lenses (i.e. the ballroom scene in Mission: Impossible). The monkeys will have goggles that will highlight this, and due to there intense monkey-fu training, they will descend upon the marked perpetrators with astounding monkey fury. The monkeys will have leather suits as protection, making them look like the main character from Splinter Cell.

The goggles will be surgically attached and will also have a feed into the monkeys' blood streams. From there, a cocktail of steroids and adrenaline will be able to be pumped into the monkeys remotely, along with tranquilizers to quell any monkey uprisings or if they start attacking innocent civilians.

All in all, I think this is a cost-effective plan. Granted, there are setbacks such as storage, feeding, and the smell of large masses of monkey poop, but that can be utilized as a weapon as well.

Plus, how great would it be to stand on top of a building and command "Release the monkeys!"?

Please let it be noted, however, those who try to take this idea will be the first training dummies to incur crazed monkey wrath. Have a nice day!