Luzula ([info]luzula) wrote in [info]ds_flashfiction,
@ 2007-10-28 17:48:00
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Entry tags:genre 2007 challenge

Genre challenge by Luzula
Title: The Unquiet Grave
Author: Luzula
Genre: Folk ballad
Pairing: Fraser/Kowalski
Rating: R for character death
Length: seven verses (185 words)
Notes: Thank you to [info]j_s_cavalcante for the beta! This is a version of The Unquiet Grave (Child ballad #78), written as a Mountie on the Bounty AU. The first verse, the last verse and the last two lines of the next-to-last verse are taken from this version of the song. Other versions can be found here for comparison. I learned the melody from Kate Rusby's album Sleepless. That was some time ago though, so I've probably changed it (but it's a folk song, so I bet there are countless variants anyway).

You can download a recording here. I sing the melody and my sister plays the guitar. ETA: There is now also a permanent link, thanks to [info]general_jinjur: right click and download.


Cold blows the wind to my true love
And gently drops the rain
I never had but one true love
And in the water you lie slain

Although we fought and came to blows
You trusted me that day
You followed me out on the waters deep
And there you found your grave

You could not swim, you could not breathe
In the darkness and the cold
My breath, it could not save your life
My hands, they lost their hold

Your hair among the seaweed floats
Lake water fills your mouth
While I stand on the shore alone
And in my heart a drought

I walk on crowded city streets
And you walk by my side
When you speak, it is for my ears alone
And others pass unseeing by

I want you to hold me close
In your arms where I belong
But if I kiss your cold clay lips
My days will not be long

When will we meet again, my love,
When will we meet again?
When the autumn leaves that fall from the trees
Are green and spring up again




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[info]isiscolo
2007-10-28 07:34 pm UTC (link)
Aie! Waah! Sob!

I mean, nice job. But! Waah!

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[info]luzula
2007-10-28 07:59 pm UTC (link)
I'm sorry! I really didn't plan on writing something so angsty. I was looking through different ballads to see if anything fit, and then this one just struck me really hard. But thanks!

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[info]malnpudl
2007-10-28 08:08 pm UTC (link)
Oh, wow! That's heartbreaking and lovely. Beautiful. Even if you did make me cry.

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[info]luzula
2007-10-29 09:34 am UTC (link)
Thank you, I'm glad it moved you. And yeah, I may have cried a little too at some point while writing it.

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[info]belmanoir
2007-10-28 10:50 pm UTC (link)
holy crap. *bawls*

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[info]luzula
2007-10-29 09:38 am UTC (link)
*hands you a handkerchief*

Only in fandom do you take it as a compliment if you made someone cry...

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[info]china_shop
2007-10-28 11:55 pm UTC (link)
Oh, that's lovely -- and tragic and omg, Fraaaaaaser! :-( :-(

But really lovely!

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[info]luzula
2007-10-29 09:39 am UTC (link)
Thank you. And I didn't plan on doing this to poor Fraser -- the lyrics just kind of wrote themselves.

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[info]agentotter
2007-10-29 03:40 am UTC (link)
Very beautiful, LOVE the MP3.

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[info]luzula
2007-10-29 09:39 am UTC (link)
Thank you. I wasn't 100% happy with the recording, since I'm much more used to singing a capella, and accompaniment makes me feel strange. But I'm very glad you like it!

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[info]keerawa
2007-10-29 04:37 am UTC (link)
Oh, that is tragic. And the implication, taken from the original, that Fraser can see Ray's ghost, but that to interact with him would be to embrace death. *shivers*

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[info]luzula
2007-10-29 09:39 am UTC (link)
Yeah, it is tragic. And also, the original ending is kind of ambiguous, as well. It could mean that they will never meet, since the leaves that fall now will never be green again. OTOH, it could also mean that Fraser will die in the spring, when the new leaves grow.

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[info]spuffyduds
2007-10-29 05:57 pm UTC (link)
Whoo, OUCH. Well done.

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[info]luzula
2007-10-30 12:23 pm UTC (link)
I'm glad you like it, even though it hurts!

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[info]ifreet
2007-10-30 05:13 am UTC (link)
Hey, ow. Very well done.

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[info]luzula
2007-10-30 12:24 pm UTC (link)
Thank you for the comment, I really appreciate it.

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[info]zabira
2007-11-03 07:44 am UTC (link)
OH! i just found this while looking at the skip=10,000 that happened while i was moving.

what a beautiful heartbreak! i was sort of tearing up just reading the lyrics, and then for real at your lovely recording of it. and ghost ray? ::sighs:: this fandom has so many possibilities for bittersweet, and you hit one of them with that.

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[info]luzula
2007-11-03 06:55 pm UTC (link)
Thank you! Oh wow, the recording made you cry? That's cool, because all I hear when I listen to it is the flaws (we didn't have a lot of time to practise, plus I'm really not used to singing with accompaniment). Glad you liked the song!

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[info]take_no_ko
2007-11-12 11:32 pm UTC (link)
It's lovely. Very poignant too, but lovely.

And look! Look at our fandom! We branch out into even more media! How awesome are you?

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[info]luzula
2007-11-13 09:56 am UTC (link)
Thank you, I'm so glad you like it!

Actually, if you like the song thing, I've also done a slashy version of Northwest Passage. /self-pimping

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[info]viciouscats
2007-11-26 11:00 pm UTC (link)
Ouch. This is beautiful. *sobs*

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[info]luzula
2007-11-27 04:24 pm UTC (link)
Yeah, the song did turn out kind of angsty. I'm glad you liked it, though.

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