| Nuts of doom! |
[Sep. 6th, 2008|12:47 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  groggy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | nothin. Drinking red Kool-aid. | ] |
I heard something go flappetyflapflap in my room. That better not be a BAT, goddammit. They don't have venom for me to be allergic to but trying to catch one so I can take it outside is a pain, especially since I can't find the needed bat-containment apparatuseseses.
Could be worse-- I could have fishing spiders in my bed or a walnut tree growing in my room. I dreamed about one of those things. It really sucked, even though a tree in my room would be cool. A black walnut in my room? No thanks. Do not want it shedding walnuts on my head or the stinky green skins that stink worse if they're broken or even handled and the oil stains everything.
I read some time ago that in some localities there's a problem with people poaching black walnut trees, using helicopters even. Shit, they should come to Hellinois. They're like roaches, people'll pay poachers to take these trees, please! (go away, Henny Youngman's ghots). Anybody who's had to clean up after these suckers will know what I'm talking about. But they did have one useful function-- when I was a kid we used the skins to shine the chrome on our bikes. It actually reduced the appearance of rust somehow! Only problem is our hands were stinky after fifty-twelve washings and our nails turned black. |
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[Sep. 6th, 2008|02:51 pm] |
The store my landlord owns got involved in a hold up last night. I came home and saw a couple of police officers outside the store just as they were about to close up. Apparently the guy tried to get some money off of Ling (attendant at counter) and grabbed her when she refused. John (landlord) chased the guy into a residential area when the guy jumped the fence and drove off in his car that he parked right at the back. John reckoned the thing was all planned. hmmm. I must remember to lock the doors at night now. :/
oh it's even in the news!
http://www.news.com.au/story/0,23599,24303617-29277,00.html |
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| Little Jesus, Oneshot dn_contest entry |
[Sep. 5th, 2008|08:08 pm] |
Week # 23 - School Title: Little Jesus Rating: PG Characters/Pairings: Mello, Near, Warnings: Nothing really... Except a bit of bullying.... A very slight bit of MelloxNear... Word count: 921 Notes: Heh, had to write this fairly quickly.... I either was going to write this or a Sayu prompt, though I kinda knew that someone else would do a Sayu prompt.... So I did this one... ( L is nothing in comparison to me. ) |
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| Standards |
[Sep. 5th, 2008|02:16 pm] |
Title: Standards
Rating: PG
Pairings/Characters: Sachiko, Sayu, Light, Soichiro
Notes: This was written in a bit of a rush, and I'm not sure if it's coherent. It's about how the Yagamis have different academic standards for their respective offspring. Enjoy! Written for prompt #23 (school), at ![[info]](http://p-stat.livejournal.com/img/community.gif) dn_contest
Word Count: 720
( She steels herself, fists balled and teeth gritted. ) |
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| Как мило.) |
[Sep. 5th, 2008|03:03 pm] |
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| /woke up from my sleep to the sound of that voice/from the words that i heard i had no choice/ |
[Sep. 5th, 2008|12:07 am] |
| [ | Tags | | | emo country | ] |
| [ | mood |
| |  stressed | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Will I Ever Make It Home - Ingram Hill | ] |
Now that I've been at school for a day, I'm depressed. I shouldn't be. There's no reason to be, nothing's changed. It's just that I'm starting to feel the weight of everything I have to do. Today, things went smoothly, but that was just one day. I have an entire semester to get through, and that's just the one semester. After that, I've got three more, then grad school if I can get in, and then years and years of working and working until I finally reach the point where I'm technically supposed to retire but can't because the economy has made it impossible to do so before the age of 150. Life seems so overwhelming its ridiculous. I know I just have to take it one step at a time, and that that's all that I can do, and that's what I was doing until recently. But tomorrow's going to be busy--three classes plus a long, long commute home, one which involves a new route that I'm unsure about. Then work, which I may have screwed up in...I apparently asked for one too many days off, and while no one's really getting on my case about it, it was brought up, and that makes me more nervous than it should. It's just too many things at once, too much to take one step at a time.
I'm scared I'm going to fail school. I'm scared that I'm going to get fired. That everyone I love secretly hates me and that my roommate who seems nice so far is going to turn out to be inexplicably evil and that my mother is going to die and oh god oh god I just, I need to calm down. I need to stop getting anxious and depressed over these things. I will calm down, once I get reacclimated to being in school. Once I get my routine down. I hate how much I need routine. What's funny is that I'm probably going to drop a Stress Management class I signed up for, because I need the free time or I'll be too stressed. Also I might work at the daycare at that time, if they can use my hours, but shush the irony is awesome.
That...helped. Writing that out. Also talking to my roommate about Depeche Mode. She's very, very chatty, and while it's not exactly welcome when one is trying to sulk, it's probably better for me in the long run to be distracted. And she's very sweet. She won't decide she hates me, she won't... |
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| Sometimes oldies just ain't so goodie. |
[Sep. 4th, 2008|10:27 pm] |
I was sitting on the can when this absofuckinglutely HUGE spider came dancing out of nowhere. (Huge by Great Lakes American standards where they don't really grow too big). It wasn't a wolf spider and I didn't know what the hell it was. Legspan had to be close to three inches. It moved real fast when I tried to make it go away and at one point, charged me. Ohfuck. (squish) Sorry, but I'm venom allergic and somewhat arachnophobic.
I looked this one up. A fishing spider (Dolomedes). Damn, wish I'd caught it and taken it outside. I'm not sure how that one got in the bathroom since it's an outdoor spider that lives near water. And it was a little undersized for that spider family. Yikes, what next, gigantor huntsman spiders as big as kitchen clocks? Not likely since I live in a temperamental climate zone but still, what next? Yikes.
I installed a torrent of The Sims 1 for old times' sake-- I'd had it on an old computer back when it was included with Mandrake. Urgh... those noisy graphics. I felt like I needed eye surgery again-- but worst was I started getting seizure auras. I'll go uninstall it later and stick to Sims 2. There's no way I could create S1 version of the Lakes and the Shimuras. They just wouldn't look right-- especially since Bunny Lake is a mermaid. |
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| Nervous breakdown, much? |
[Sep. 4th, 2008|07:46 pm] |
Well, I had my once a year freakout today at work. And it was brought on from the stress of work (because I am giving a hard ass time for someone not being certified, which makes it harder on me), the stress the Education department has thrust on me, the amounts of homework piled on top of me. While it may be easy, incredibly time-consuming. And realms-con in general.
FUCK.
An artery in my head felt like it was going to explode, and my throat felt anaphylactic. And I didn't get to go to the fucking morgue today. Fucking Nino... At least I got a ride from one of the bad ass Pharmacists. I'll elaborate on them later.
But most of all, it's been not seeing Randy. That has killed me over the past few weeks, and I just really really want to see him.
Dammit, why do all these freaking people depend on me so fucking much for everything?
I need to take a shower. And I need to sleep. And I need to cry. And I need to fuck. Shit, I need to eat.
I'm turning into L.
And believe me, it's not pleasant. |
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| Happiness is an L plushie with my glasses on its butt... |
[Sep. 4th, 2008|05:04 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  hungry | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Always The Moon - Jonathan Coulton | ] |
Last night at around 10 PM, I moved back to school. It was too late to actually get my keys and get moved in, since the Resident Life Office was closed, so I wound up crashing at Erik's place. We spent the night bitching about how it was too hot to be cuddling, but doing it anyway. After all, it's been about two months since we've seen each other. This morning I was able to get my keys and get settled in, as well as fix up a couple of things relating to my schedule--now I'll be taking Spanish instead of Hebrew, thank God. Hebrew's quite pretty, but it's too difficult for something that will never be of any use to me. Spanish will be very helpful if I'm a teacher, especially if I'm going to teach in New York. Also, I dropped by the daycare center to give them my hours--I interned there last semester, so if they need anyone during the hours I can spare, I'm in. Over all, things are going smoothly. Now, if I can just get all my stupid files transferred onto my stupid computer, I will be completely at peace.
Always The Moon - Jonathan Coulton |
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| Things to talk about... things to discuss |
[Sep. 3rd, 2008|03:43 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | productive | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Chowder | ] |
First of all, have you ever noticed little things that have been there, but you just notice it now?
On my six icons, and when I look at the keywords I have to choose, I noticed that I have B with fire, another picture of B where he's being kind of elusive, Mikami eating chips, an atomic explosion, a bloody hand, and L.
So then I thought of a NEW meme.
Icon Story Meme
Make a brief drabble that requires you to use all of your icons (at least 6 if you're a plus user), to where it makes a cohesive enough story.
Here is mine: One day, after Mikami went to go buy some chips, he almost caught aflame from the fire that was started by the murderer in the Los Angeles BB murder cases. He was all, "Who set this place on fire?" And suddenly B himself appeared, hooded and hiding in the shadows, and he went, "I see you like BBQ flavor. I think you'll like BB flavor instead", and he lights another match to finish the job. And so Mikami goes, "Get away from me pervert." But then L appeared, in a flash of psychedelic quasar-like glimmer, and so he said, "B, leave this man alone to his chips." And B's like, "I will top you L." And L replies, "Try it." And they have a stare down, but apparently since B wears more eyeliner, he won by default. And then so he's all, "Ha, I win." And he grabs L and Mikami, and throws the match, unaware that it fell near some combustibles and gasoline. And L's hands gets bloody and raw from having to fap both B and Mikami at the same time, and whenever they orgasm, the fire spreads to a gas tank and everything explodes. Literally.
Okay, your turn. :D
Oh, and it is confirmed!!!!!!! My mom just bought me a new battery for my camera, and you WILL have Realms con photos. Though if I forget the camera again this year, that's just inevitable.
I'm also trying very hard to get as much of my homework done as I can. Obviously, I'm not working today, but I've skipped work to do homework, work on my Realms con stuff, make posters for I and the other two, sleep... and I don't know. More things.
Actually, I should be getting to that now. See ya. |
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| Lol. Bank account. |
[Sep. 2nd, 2008|09:12 pm] |
I'm starting to feel the benefits of growing up.
Yep... I just booked a hotel room for the anime con this Friday. I paid for it in full, since Marissa half-assed us in the end, and Stephen's being an asshole again. And he suddenly got some fine, and she doesn't have money, and so they're just dead weight. While Randy is paying for his and my passes for the con, and checking in because he's 18, and I'm throwing the money for the room and the spending cash. Hopefully, that hoe Marissa can fork out some cash for food. Because that's her job. And I don't give a shit if she has to stay up all Thursday night cooking or crap like that.
Fucking, girls.
I cannot fucking stand any right now. And dumbass Carmen isn't helping by being a bitch.
And it's also not helping that everyone on my flist is female. Well, then again, ![[info]](http://p-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) fox_in_exile doesn't completely constitute for female. But in a good way. *Clings to her*
Last night, I also bleached and dyed red streaks in my hair. But this was some weird brand with a highly concentrated pigment, and there are still horrible stains on my scalp that will not go away. And when I went to go wash it out, the tub looked like an effing bloodbath. I started showering first, but flecks of deep red water got everywhere, and it appeared as if someone was brutally murdered or something. I kid you not. It was hilarious.
I also came out with a weird philosophical epiphany last night. However, I never got around to explaining it. Remind me to sometime later. Bring up something called the Orphan Complex, and I'll know what you're talking about.
Okay. Got to go find some asymptotes. I'll update tomorrow. |
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| Writer's Block: Sarah Palin? |
[Sep. 2nd, 2008|07:31 pm] |
I think Mccain would've been better off picking someone else. I can see why he did it, because he wants the conservative vote, though I think it's a stupid move. It seems more than a bit hypocritical that he would choose someone like her as a running mate when he critizised Obama for not having enough experience. Palin has only been Governer, and for a short time at that. To me the standing of Governer isn't enough to qualify you for the presidential ticket. Also, she is getting way too much attention for menial things like her daughter's pregnancy which has nothing to do with her skills as a possible Vice President. If Mccain became President and died in office, I wouldn't feel safe with her leading the country. |
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| Here's where you nod and smile and pretend to be interested in my boring life... |
[Sep. 2nd, 2008|04:28 pm] |
Real Life
1. Windows Vista 64 Bit is a whore. Apparently, WMM on this system can't process .avi files properly. It imports the sound, but not the images. I got a free video converter, but it'll be a right pain in the ass to convert all my files. I'm trying to track down a codec that will fix this, but nothing I've found actually works so far. Any tips?
2. Last night I had this absolutely awesome ice cream. Gianni New York Gourmet Ice Cream. It's named after various streets and neighborhoods in NYC! Little Italy Spumoni, Broadway Birthday Cake, Park Avenue Peanut Butter Chocolate...it's one of the most awesome concepts I've ever heard of, and it's delicious, too. These people deserve a medal. I am in love with this ice cream, and I want to try every type available. I wish we hadn't already eaten it all.
3. I am stalling on packing, badly. I hate having to get organized like this, and I really don't know what I'm going to need. I can't find my alarm clock, and I don't want to have to go looking for it. I just want to sit here and use the computer until my sister gets home, but I'm leaving for school tomorrow, so I have to get this done. Luckily, I only need to pack for three days--I'll be heading back home on the weekend, for work. I can do this over the next few weeks, easily. I just need to get all the basics done with. Bedding and the like. And an alarm clock.
Fandom
1. I'm actually making some progress on the L/Matsuda/Light fic I'm writing for jessieheart. So far, I don't exactly have a coherent plot, but I have some idea of what I'm doing, and I've written about 600 words. Hopefully now that I've actually started, I'll be able to move more quickly. It seems to be largely from Matsuda's POV so far, but I'm planning on skipping around a bit, to make things more interesting. This fic will have to include quite a bit of sex, and I've never actually written a sex scene that wasn't het before. Well, I have, but it was really vague and hardly anything even happened...it was just kissing and petting, really. So I'm a little nervous. Anybody got any tips for writing yaoi? Any dos or donts?
2. Katy and I have actually somewhat successfully integrated Avatar into our crack!RP. We take a lot of liberties with reality...most of the characters know a demon with seemingly unlimited powers. The problem is not so much being able to do magical things, but being able to convince the demon (who is a totally bastardized version of Hiei from Yu Yu Hakusho) to do what they want. So lately, Matt, Mello, and Sayu (yes, Sayu. Not Near. Sayu is Matt's girlfriend in this mess) have been hanging out with the folks of Avatar in their world. They have done nice things, like bringing them food and showing Sokka technological wonders like cell phones, and they've also done horrible things like tricking them into taking cocaine. We just had a plot where the Avatar folk go to the world the story normally takes place in. There, Toph had sex with Shigure, Katara had to be begged not to destroy a power plant she saw, and Sokka contracted a virus engineered by Ms. Former Biological Terrorist Tohru Honda. But he got to use the fucking Internet before that. Aang didn't really do anything. For some reason he has almost no role in this story. I have nothing against him, he just...doesn't do much. Hell, I actively dislike Mello, and I could care less about Matt, and yet they're some of our most important players. So yeah...it doesn't quite make sense, and it isn't quite IC, but it's fun.
3. Speaking of Katy. I was talking about how I have a hard time finding fanfiction I like, because people aren't terribly interested in the subjects I am--namely flashbacks/childhood, and illness. I mean, I like other things too, but it's hard to find things about these subjects that are intelligent and interesting. Katy got why not so many people would be interested in the little kid thing, but she said she couldn't understand why they didn't think disease was an awesome topic. Not that I don't see reasons for that, but just that she said it...it makes me happy. XD; My sister is as ridiculous as I am. Which, I suppose, is why some of our major RP plots involve disease.
I Want To Be Bad - Tegan & Sara |
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| One of those annoying posts where I talk about my boyfriend... |
[Sep. 2nd, 2008|01:10 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  indescribable | ] |
| [ | music |
| | The Way - Fastball | ] |
Yesterday I found out something that was...well, it was heart wrenching. Admittedly, I've heard worse news, and when I think about this more carefully, it actually isn't so bad, but my initial, gut reaction was that this was absolutely terrible.
What it is is that my boyfriend might be transferring schools. Nothing's confirmed yet, but the programs at our school won't really support his career goals. I understand that, and I think it's a perfectly valid reason for wanting to transfer. I actually admire him greatly for thinking about his future like that. It's a rare trait in people our age, and one I truly admire. But when I heard that he was thinking about it, all I could think was 'oh my god he's leaving me'. Even though I knew that wasn't it at all, and that we could do long distance if we had to, and that he loves me and isn't switching schools to get away from me. It just...hurt. Because I'd miss him, and because I'm always so scared of coming back to school, and I always reassure myself by saying 'oh, at least I'll see Erik'. Transitions are so hard. I was fighting back tears, and I can't really hide my emotions well. Everyone in my family could tell I was upset. I blamed in on cramps, because I didn't want to make a scene at the moment. My mom and my stepdad were renewing their vows that day, and the last thing I wanted to do was worry them just before they did that.
It was a nice little ceremony, with our dogs and the neighbors dogs milling around as Dot, a reverend who lives nearby, asked my mother if she took Dave to be her lawfully wedded wife. We ate a horrifying amount of food, and spent more time as a family than we have in a while. I actually wound up hugging Davis at one point, which was amazing, because I've maybe hugged him once in the seven years since his dad married my mom. I was just...really impressed with something he did, and that's his business so I'm not going to get into it, but. It was a great day, except that I couldn't stop thinking about Erik. In the end, I did tell my mother, and by that point I'd received a second email about it.
In the email, he said some really incredible things. Things I suppose I knew deep down, but that I was worried weren't true. Things that make me love him more than I can say. Things like, I don't like it, but what good will I be as a husband if I don't have myself on track with the right career skills? and I'm willing to put up with a couple years of long-distance in exchange for a lifetime of waking up in the morning to find you in arms reach. I am incredibly grateful and happy to have someone like him in my life. He not only loves me, but he actually wants and is planning for a future with me. I mean, I knew this already, but this drives it home. I haven't responded to his email yet because I just...I don't know what to say to that. It hurts to acknowledge that I might not get to see him at school after a semester or two, that I'll hardly see him at all if he goes to school too far away, but I just. Love him. So much. And I'm so impressed by his forethought and honored that it's partially to be a good husband to me. I feel like I have to say something special in response to that, and I don't know what to say besides that I'll miss him like crazy if he goes, and I love him, and I wish we were older so we could just freaking get married already. He'll read this, I know he will, and this is a silly, passive way of telling him, but my words aren't enough for something like this. I don't know how to respond properly.
I'll see him Wednesday. I don't know what I'll do then. I just...want to hold him for a long, long time. |
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[Sep. 1st, 2008|09:35 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  tired | ] |
This journal is going on hiatus from today. Thank you all. |
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