Dear Mun,

You'd really app me there? Would you?!

With Loki being the only one else from our world, I'd be able to make him happy without any interference from Yamino.

Sure, it's been a bit rough to make him happy, but this would allow the perfect opportunity to practice.

Though, I have a queston. You put 'false god' in my journal name. Why? I'm not a false god! Just because I don't agree with DracOdin doesn't mean I'm not a god anymore.

Also, if it's not too much trouble, I'd like a few more icons. I think smiling ALL the time might make Loki more nervous than I already seem to do. I'd rather he not flip another table.

Sincerely,
Heimdall The Fourth Level Boss.

I will miracle for cake.

Who is in need of a miracle?

I have experience with blessed cheer, the destruction of heathen cities, good tidings, weather, and legions of the undead.

I will grant two miracles for a snickers bar.

Merry Christmas, Mun-san.

Bonsoir, Mademoiselle.

It was very kind of you to spend quite a few hours setting me up just right, but really, you could have spent more of that time at your family party. Especially since today seems to be such an important day to everyone. Really, you remind me of Monsieur with how regretfully you leave the room.

But in any case, thank you for bringing me here. Hopefully, I will be able to find a Roman. And a temporary home, at that.

Bonne nuit.

~ Hortense

I suppose I can accept - with some reserve - that these songs you are considering, by this band, Korn, will do as part of my personal "theme songs." It's time you selected a few for me, anyhow.

However, I do not understand why "Do What They Say" is on this list. "Love and Luxury" makes sense, in a nice twisted sort of way, and I particularly enjoy the lullaby reference in "Hushabye." But really. "Bitch, We've Got a Problem"? I do not have multiple personality disorder, nor do I like anyone who had multiple personality disorder. And "Do What They Say" has a few nice lines, but is not, overall, a good fit for my character.

Please try a little harder in the future.

... Do you really think it's funny that two muses of yours have died in the span of two months?

I can't pretend to understand you, but can you at least stop calling me "Tousenfly" now? "Flysen" isn't any better.

While you're all stuffing your faces with a pornography of food, gobbling down slathered breasts and sizzling crops dripping with butter-rich, cholesterol-inducing delectation, spare a thought for the pissy redundant squawking about family and loving thy neighbour - we all know that's what we're supposed to be doing, let's be honest, but it's bloody boring getting off our magnificent collective arse to do anything about it. Succor the poor? Well, yes, that'd be wonderful, but are you really going to pledge a thousand macaroons to starving, inflated African babies after reading this? He expects too much, Arthur. Forget about the miserable state of your own sorry affairs and pretend it isn't happening or, better yet, pray for things to get better. (Praying reaches God alright, don't get me wrong, although He's never actually bothered by what He hears. You want a compassionate deity? Sorry, please leave your message after the eternal angelic chorus of how fucking brilliant He is, it's pretty lengthy.)

Junior isn't as accepting as you'd think. If he really wanted you to be yourself, he'd say Nar ol'fella, put up yer feet and forget all about me for once, don't feel bad about it and you'll notice he instead makes a point about bleating on about other people. You, he knows, are an egotistical cell phone-toting breed whose only sliver of conscience can be manipulated by guilt. (That's one of my major corners, guilt, but he manages to throw his weight around with it to the nth degree. Catholics for example; riddled! Can't help but thank him for that, makes the pedophiles that much more hilarious when they're wondering if they shouldn't slice off their todge because it's been cheerfully dirtied.) It's all petulance, consigning your rotting homeless and murdering psychopaths and deliciously suspect rim-jobs to the back-burner because he just can't be fussed to deal with it, he wants a holiday. Think about how great things could be if everyone was a little nicer, isn't that better than how they are? Eeyah, it was all going so well until I saw that advert about a 2-year-old getting clubbed around the face on TV begging for my moolah. He has faith in you, absolutely, wouldn't contest it ... the kind that if a human needs to lie desperately enough, it'll easily take itself in. Feeling exploited yet?

Aziraphale himself couldn't bitch me out there, although you probably shouldn't listen to all those long words he prefers to try and sound intelligent. Nelchael would agree, but I'll admit he's biased. How about Uriel then? Traitorous cunt can't argue with me even if he wanted to swing around half the Hellish hosts for a second hootnanny. If you're thinking of launching a counter-attack just remember that I have an eighty-per-cent success rate, my darlings, it means I'm on to something.

Oh and while I'm here, mundane, could you get me a 99p cone? Don't think I could stomach anything laden with gravy.

It worries me that you consistently refer to that screenshot as 'Gestapo!Issei with a rapeface'.

...I see your point, but still.

And no, you are not going to use that version of myself in a virus! The game hasn't been translated - the game hasn't even been released, so you know absolutely nothing about what I'm like or what you would even do with me.

No, 'Gestapo with a rapeface' is not all you need to know, mun. For one thing, that certainly is the school uniform, and means nothing about me. It says more about the school. And I know that I have - the other me has - a good reason for that expression which is completely in line with my normal behavior! Give me the benefit of the doubt, at least.

Bonsoir Mademoiselle Mundane.

I, the doll of death, want to ask you...
Why have you brought me here?

Show me your Roman.

- Violette

No.

No no no no no.  I'm very much aware that it is the mun tradition to smirk at a pup's resistance and go ahead with whatever mynock-brained scheme is planned, but this time, you will listen.  You are apping me.  I'm resigned to that.  You are not apping him, either instead of or in addition to me.  You can't play Grand Admiral Thrawn, here or anywhere else.

Because if you did, it wouldn't even be him, it would be Generic Mysterious Character, mark five, with a Thrawn exterior.  Very nearly no one plays him right, and I'm not just saying this as someone who impersonally respected and disliked instead of personally loved or hated him, I'm saying this as the part of you that reads the canon and reads fanfiction.  And you know it's almost impossible to get him right in fanfiction when he's got more than a cameo.  You tried, remember?  Yeah, remember how that worked out?  And no, amnesia wouldn't help.  If anything, RP would be even harder.

This is half of why I wanted you to try for Grodin Tierce.  Yeah, he completely lacks that composure, he looks completely different, and the... thing he does with art doesn't appear to be there, but if he loses that mystery, it doesn't matter.  If he completely misses something, it's not out of character.  You can handle him, with some difficulty.  You can't handle Thrawn.

All right.  Look.  If it will dissuade you, I'll make a concession.  That phrase that gave you this idiotic idea - "a real painting looks very much not like a print; the colors shiver and burn" or something like that - if it really appeals to you that much, once I'm established you can .... IF it's the only way ... try to convince the mods to turn me into him.  TEMPORARILY.  Very much TEMPORARILY. I'll even act on some odd impulse and call myself by some other name, IF they go along with it.  Just don't try to play him.  Is that acceptable?

It is?  Happy - oh, well, happy life day to you, too.  Just remember: I think you'll do all right, but you're no shezan.

...how the hell could you choose to revive me on a day like this?

Especially after everything that's fucking happened.

After all those years...

What went wrong?

Mundane!

You say there is going to be a parade today? Why must we watch it on that... Box? It would be much better to go and see it ourselves! What do you mean we cannot?

Fine, fine. As long as there is a parade with dancing and music... I greatly approve!

...What do you mean you're not sure you can find it? I thought it was on the box.

ETA: I am going to be in this parade?! What do you mean, maybe? Well, you should have told me this earlier!

Vee, vee, mun! Buon natale! Let's have some fun! It's Christmas morning! That movie you wanted to watch has been recorded too! Why don't we sit down and go watch it? I bet it's cute as the last Christmas special you just watched a while ago!

And then when you're ready you can go back to reading up on my history! I promise the parts before and after WWII is just as interesting.

Are the holidays over yet, mun?

You know how I get around this time of year. And I don’t want to get accused of being a Scrooge because I spent Christmas Eve watching Die Hard at the movie theater rather than partake in festivities.

At least nothing bad has happened yet...

-Aya Brea

You have my personality to finish. That's about it. You have everything else finished, already. Don't spend almost two weeks on the application just to let your reserve run out, and then decide you don't want to do it anymore.
I don't appreciate being given up on.
If you're going to do that, you may as well just let me get back to my life. 

So you're going to try again, now that the game's actually out.

Just don't forget that I have to find a way to rescue her.

I already told you, I'm not here to 'support' you or anything, so just give up that hope. As for me, I was stuck in your 'headspace' on Christmas Eve. You can't expect a girl to spend Christmas Eve alone and be happy about it, okay?

Whatever, that application's half written, isn't it? All that's left is the samples. Do you normally leave people hanging like this?

Mun, as I understand that's the official title I should be using...

While I appreciate your interest in both me and my job, I strongly advise you to reconsider all of this. You may be familiar with my species and my basic needs as a guinea pig, but you're still a civilian and therefore are not acquainted with proper protocol. And speaking of protocol and by extension my team, who's going to lead them while you're holding me captive in this headspace of yours, as you call it? Of course, I have nothing but faith in both Juarez and Blaster. However, if a situation comes up that requires the team's involvement, their chances of success may be hurt without me to plan tactics and make on-the-spot calls.

As much as you would like it to be this way, this isn't a game. This is serious and I'd appreciate it if you'd take it that way. I'm not "homeless"; I don't need a home. I have a family already and you know it.

...

...

...

[mouthed: I was with my light.]

...

[mouthed: My voice won't be poison there. But--]

...

Leave me be.

Great! You've found me a home...sort of. I still don't understand this 'dressing room' thing Alice Number Two's mun created, but it's better than nothing. It's more normal than anywhere else you've considered.

Ho-Ho-Ho! Well, now that my job on the real world is done, perhaps I should put my feet up for a little while...

Or perhaps I could stop by here and spread a little more joy.

Looks like the decison is made for me, Ho-Ho-Ho! Thank you for the milk and cookies, everyone, and an extra special thanks to those of you who made sure I got a nice refreshing glass of Coca-Cola!

I do not recall giving any form of indication that I am, in any way, a suitable counselor. But if you insist mundane, you may tell me.

I don't foresee any good outcome, though. It sounds boring already.

All right, some new icons. But that doesn't mean you're going to play me, does it. I remember when I used to be your favorite... now I'm surprised I still have a paid account.

You may be in three or four games now, it's true; however, it would behoove you to pay attention to D_M. It's where your friends are. That's right, I just said "behoove". I am trolling you like whoa, I hope you've noticed, even if that effectively means you are trolling yourself. Why not? It's nearly 7AM on Christmas morning and you're still awake.

Anyway, standard character complaint: I want some me time, typist. I know, I know, Jason and Babs are way more interesting than I (your bizarre little AU) am, but you still have so much you can do with me! You remember our ~*plans*~, don't you? Let's not give up.


Cordially yours,
Timothy Drake-Wayne

And now it is my birthday--by some counts.

The best birthday present any of my followers in name or spirit could give would be money or time to a charity or homeless shelter. Barring that, please let someone in your life who is bullied, weak or an outcast know the warmth of love and human fellowship in this darkest time of the year. If someone has wronged you, I beg you to please look within yourself and see if forgiveness is there. If it is, I hope you will forgive whoever has trespassed against you with the dignity and mercy befitting a beloved creation of God. If there is not forgiveness in your heart for one who has committed a wrong against you, please take just five minutes to sit and be with yourself--not with your physical beauty, wealth, popularity, knowledge, social standing or position of power, or with anything else that time can and will strip from you.

Sit and be with just yourself: the gift of a reasoning mind, a discerning intellect, a compassionate and loving heart and your inborn, noble soul.

We are all precious in God's sight. The greatest gift is to provide comfort to the sick, succor to the poor, welcome to the outcast, respect to the downtrodden and grace to the disgraced.

I hope that everyone here has a Christmas that is full of family, and that those who do not become steadfast in their desire to share the love that they are worthy of.

Interesting. You have possessed that volume for nearly a month before unwrapping it.

And the most you speak of is that I suddenly appear "twice my age"? That is unimportant. ( spoilers it seems )



Finally, I would not "steal Christmas". It would be meaningless to do so, as it is a meaningless thing to begin with, to say nothing of that it is impossible to steal a holiday as it is not an object.

Now. That follower of yours donated a year's paid time to this account. You had best make the utmost of it.

Wait. Did you just seriously stay up past 5 AM on Christmas morning workin' on copying some band thing into poster form by hand? When you coulda just printed it and handed it to him?

... that's some kinda love you got for that kid, I gotta say. Hope he appreciates it.

Merry Christmas Miss Mundane. I know you are rather indifferent towards the holiday but surely you can find ways to enjoy yourself at the very least. I'm afraid locking yourself up in your room for the whole day isn't really the most ideal way to spend such day.

Also, how about putting more effort in looking for a home for me? Time shouldn't be wasted after all.

- SUMIRE KANOU

Aoko does not want to be eaten!

Dear madam mundane,

I do really think you should quit while ahead, you have much more important muses to attend to rather than starting to make more, like myself. You know, the ones that aren't simply fabrications of your mind.

The louder sets?
I'll be more than happy to keep myself amused with those on the instant messenger, it'll be...interesting to speak with England- or even Illuminati after all these years.

Oh yes, and before I forget, Frohe Weihnachten.

--Bavaria

Can you just shut up!?

Your being very annoying!

What in the world is a "mun" anyway? Your just a peasant, how are you going to treat a noble like me properly anyway?!


Just...get Saito over here....where is that stupid idiot?

If your lip is sore, you should follow your mother's advice about putting vaseline on it.


Merry Christmas.
You don't have to worry about it. We already covered that he won't hurt me even if he tries to.

-Seta Souji

You killed me.

Just for a mini-event in an oldgotham open RP post, I know, but you killed me!

I was having a nice conversation, too!

I bled all over Mr. Wayne's nice shiny floor... how embarrassing. And then I must have caused more work for the police. Maybe even the Major Case Unit! You — you're such a, such a... cad! You don't even know who did it, and you're not allowed to say it was Mr. Onomatopoeia; he only kills non-metahuman vigilantes, and madam, I am not a vigilante.

I strongly dislike you.

No love,
Stacy

Wait wait wait. So you take me outta the box, dust me off, pretty me up, and then ship me off to some military where everyone's a total ass? You do realize I'm supposed to be a decent guy, right?

Arrrrrgggghhhh--you're wasting my time, lady! Mrs. Lulu Falconeri's not here! Where's my blushing bride? Not that we're married, or that she doesn't hate my guts, but someday, we will be. Married, I mean. And we'll play Guitar Hero on our honeymoon, and it will rock. Look at that, see, I made a pun. Guitar? Rock? You know, like rock and roll?

Look, to make a long story short: I'm a cop, not a soldier, so this move of yours blows. It seriously, seriously blows. What the hell is a box magazine?

I mean, wait. I am not an undercover cop. I am a criminal. No, I swear to God. I jaywalk all the time.


Your buddy from Bensonhurst,
Dante Falconeri Dominic Pirelli,
A mobster and not a cop

Mundane-san,

I realize you are a procrastinator. However, there's a difference between procrastinating and plain not doing it. You've already extended your reservation and you haven't been doing much during these two weeks. I suppose you've been posting and tagging with Kyon-san and Seguchi-san at discedo  in addition to those strange memes, but that's really no excuse for you to have put off re-reading the manga this long.

What are you going to do now? Your reservation runs out on Sunday, but you stupidly promised Hatsuharu-mun that you'd get the application in today. You do realize you're only in the middle of chapter six and you intend to take me from either volume eight or from chapter seventy-two. Considering it took you an entire week to read fifty-four chapters of Gravitation, I'm going to say this task is impossible.

Who knows, though? Perhaps this doubt of mine will fuel your desire to learn how to read faster and finish the application today like you promised. Then again, here you are at this community, procrastinating instead of reading more Fruits Basket.

When you decide to be more responsible, let me know.

Ah, Mun... Yes, I realize this is your third time at attempting to oh- understand me, but try not to be too hard on yourself, alright? It is only a game after all.

Just try your best- that's what matters, yes? We can work together and start anew. That's what one does come a new year, right? A 'resolution'.

...Ah. Now I'm just rambling. Perhaps you should head to bed now; you'll need to wake up early to meet your family come morrow.

HEHEH!

Merry Christmas!!

I've been a good boy from start to finish, and at a complete CLIMAX!! So I'll get a ton of presents, hehehhh!

Santa-san, I CAN'T SLEEP BECAUSE I'M TOO EXCITED!! Don't hold it against me!

... ... ... ... ... ... ... ...
... ... ... ... ... ... ... ...
... ... ... ... ... ... ... ...
... ... ... ... ... ... ... ...
... ... ... ... ... ... ... ...
... ... ... ... ... ... ... ...
... ... ... ... I don't really know what to get them, though.

Yeah, mun..

Merry Christmas from all of us here. You have been pretty nice to us. Even to Yagyuu. Good job.