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better than drugs. [entries|friends|calendar]
for everything you could never say.

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[06 May 2011|01:13am]

[ mood | numb ]

Dear You,
Maybe you think I'm a slut. But I'm not. When I saw you earlier this week, you said you wanted to see me again in July, when I came back. But when I saw you today you just about ignored and barely said hi. I like you so much it feels like love. I don't know what to do. Can you please just talk to me? Can you please just like me back? I get so many mixed signals from you and it kills me inside.
You saw me smile at you and pointed it out to your friend when you thought I couldn't hear.
I was with your best friend but it was because you had a girlfriend and I found out only after I came on to you. It was the worst mistake of my life. I just want you to know it was because of you.
I can't think about anyone but you. When I went out with ____, I always thought your name instead of his.
I don't know what to do with myself. I'm leaving Sunday and I want to tell you these things.
I don't know if I can.
Please help me tell you.
Please don't me a jerk to me like you were to her.



expectations [25 Apr 2011|03:43pm]

[ mood | resigned ]

Dear you,

I wasn't joking when I said I had low expectations in regard to internet communication. However, while my expectations for most people are hovering right around my kneecaps, for you, they're much closer to my ankles.

I don't know why I thought getting in touch with you would be a good idea. Or why I thought you'd care enough for this time to be different.

You're terrible at this and I can't deal with caring anymore.

Best of luck then in your wonderful life. When I visit in the summer, maybe I'll see you, maybe I won't. But you definitely won't hear from me again unless you make some sort of effort to let me know you actually give a shit.

Unfortunately, I fear you'll only cause my expectations to drop even lower.



[17 Feb 2011|09:44pm]

Dear A & L,

Please take the hint and fuck off out of my life!  You both make my blood boil with your immaturity and selfishness.  You  live in complete denial and delusion.  Get a grip!  You're both 21 years old, not 12.  I wish I had never met you.  I am so happy I no longer assosiate myself with you both.  Have fun living the rest of your pathetic, lonely and childish lives.



[30 Jan 2011|03:53pm]

[ mood | shy ]

Dear Jake -

I know we're at least 2300 miles apart, and I'm a complete and utter dweeb who's into KISS, but damned if I don't have a crush on the finest Sollux cosplayer I've ever laid eyes on. :D

I wish I could stop being such a weirdo, [wo]man up and come on out there this summer. We would make a dastardly duo, we would.

I wish I had the guts to tell you all this, but you'd probably run screaming...:/

More love than you know.



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