So the other day I was heading to work on 205 south just heading into Gladstone, minding my own business, around 9 pm. Yeah, I know, but I work a 24 hour shift, 10 pm to 10 pm. Anyway, I happen to notice a cop getting onto the freeway and pulling into the lane behind me. It was dark enough that I couldn't see that it was a cop car, once it was behind me, because of their headlights - I was just glad I'd noticed the light rack while they were still a lane over. And the next thing you know, they start tailgating me! Hell no, you are NOT going to tailgate me into speeding and then giving me a speeding ticket for it! So I put on my cruise control, just a hair under 55. And they follow me for the next several miles, pulling right up to my tail and then backing off a bit, over and over. This is starting to seriously freak me out. I am being the most boring driver imaginable - not changing lanes, not varying my speed, playing nice with other drivers wanting to merge into my lane, etc. Heh, maybe the playing nice with the merge made them suspicious. ;) Anyway, for those of you who don't know that part of 205, as you head through West Linn there is a stretch where the freeway goes down a fairly long slope and the speed limit increases to 65 at the bottom of the hill. Most people speed up as soon as they hit that downhill stretch. I figure the cops are waiting for me to do just that, so I watched my speedometer like a hawk as we crested the hill, in case my cruise control was of the type that doesn't slow you down to maintin the speed, just keeps you from dropping below it (it's an older car, it's possible). Nope, still rock solid just below 55 mph, and suddenly the cops put their lights on. WTF? So I pull over - nice wide shoulder on that hill anyway - and wait for them to tell what they're smoking. Seriously, I was doing NOTHING wrong. Well, one of them comes to my window and says that they ran my plate and it looked to be expired.

Okay, so I bought the car used just a few weeks ago. Went to the DMV that same day to fill out forms and write them a bloody ONE HUNDRED AND SIXTY DOLLAR check, because the mechanic I bought it from never bothered to put the title in his name, though he's had it for a couple of years, so I have to pay the late fees and shit as well. I have the DMV form, but (being the super-speedy machine that they are...) they haven't processed it yet. And never mind the fact that I HAVE CURRENT TAGS ON THE PLATE, the system still showed that the car was unregistered for the past several years because the DMV is slow.

Of course, it all got straightened out fairly quickly. And I heard the second cop (who stayed by the cop car) coaching the first one at one point before he came to my window. So I'm guessing he was training a rookie. But still, WTF were they running my plates for???? Creepy shit.

current state: aggravated