crack, y0

challenge #4.5 - fic

Fri, 16 Feb 2007 09:20:35 GMT

Title: Naruto does Middle-earth
Rating: G, but could read like a PG-13
Challenge: #4.5 - The Genderbender AU
Fandoms: Naruto, Lord of the Rings
Summary: Naruto wends his way into Middle-earth and manages to both save the day and cause untold destruction. All those elves and men with angsty backstories suddenly forced to face their feelings instead of taking it out on orcs? Tears! Tears of woe. Fortunately that is outside the scope of this story.
Notes: This isn't very good, and the style is irritatingly inconsistent. It's all my fault. Also I've only ever seen maybe 10 episodes of Naruto total and the 2 movies, so if my Naruto is OOC, that's my fault also.

"I'm telling you, Merry, it isn't going to work!"

"Well, I'm telling you, Merry, that it is going to work, and whom are you going to believe, a fool of a Took or the ninja who brought you the wonders of ramen?"

"Sorry, Pip."

Naruto grinned triumphantly at Merry. The hobbit was practically a kindred spirit, never mind that he had fuzzy foot hair.

"Don't worry, I've done it heaps of times before, and I'm the best ninja in the world! Your wizard Gandalf won't be able to resist my charms!" Technically, Naruto knew that he was the only ninja in this particular world, but he wasn't going to let a little technicality like that get in the way of persuading Merry to let him turn into a girl and seduce Gandalf so that the hobbits could steal some fireworks. After all, it was only a matter of time before he was the best ninja in the entire universe, alternate dimensions included.

"Go on, then!" Merry urged Naruto. Naruto grinned impishly and cast his Sexy Technique.

He couldn't quite explain it. His ninjitsu had been going wonky all day, ever sicne that morning, when he had lost control of a summoning technique and wound up in this strange village where everyone was very short, except one old man with a hat, who was conversely very tall. And now, after the smoke had cleared...

"I don't think it worked, Naruto," Merry said. "You don't look like a girl at all."

"Um," Naruto scratched his head.

"This whole thing's been a mistake from the start!" Pippin exclaimed. "You can't distract Gandalf by changing into a girl. You should change into a nice old wizard with a decent house and plans for the future."

"Um," Naruto struggled to break the news in as gentle a manner as possible, "I think I've accidentally turned you both into girls."

"Don't be daft, Naruto," Merry laughed and waved a hand at him. "We've always been girls. Let's get back to the party, Pip. I think we can talk someone into getting the fireworks for us."

Naruto frowned. Well that was odd. He looked around the party and gaped at his handiwork. The men were now women, and the women were now men, and no one seemed to realise that they had switched genders at all. But, if no one was going to yell at Naruto for screwing up then...

"I'll have half a pint of whatever that is, please!" He called to the hobbit manning the ale.

About five minutes later, Bilbo Baggins clattered onto the stage and cleared her throat. There was an inaudible but perceivable groan from the audience. Bilbo pouted.

"That's frightfully rude," she said, wagging her finger at them. "You could at least pretend to be interested. Anyway, I really only have a few important things to say. Three important things, in fact. First of all, I'd like to thank everyone for coming. Even if you gossip behind my back, think I'm an odd sort of hobbit and need a husband."

The hobbits in the great tent exchanged uncomfortable looks.

"Second of all, I want everyone to raise a glass to my niece, Frodo, without whom I would truly be a lonely, lonely spinster. To Frodo, my darling." Bilbo raised her glass to a blushing Frodo and the other hobbits followed suit, not least because Frodo was growing into a fine young lass. "I'm leaving her everything. You're all witnesses. Which brings me to my final point. I'm going away on a journey. I haven't been entirely honest with you, Frodo, Gandalf. I was so stupid. I don't know why I did it, but I can't keep it a secret any longer because it's eating at me like Fatty Bolger eats at supper. When I was in that cave with Gollum, she didn't give me the ring, and I didn't win it either... I... I guess you could say I stole it. I'm so sorry I lied, and now I have to take it back. Could you ever forgive me?"

"Oh, Bilbo, of course we forgive you!" Frodo said after a long and baffled silence.

"Do you really?" Bilbo blubbered, climbing off the stage. "Oh, I'm so glad! Look at me, I'm tearing up!"

"It was not your fault," Gandalf said, giving Bilbo a hug. "The ring is treacherous and it begins to work its evil magic on you the moment you pick it up."

"I really do want to give it back," Bilbo said. "If only I knew how to find Gollum."

"I'm afraid that ring does not belong to Gollum," Gandalf said solemnly. "It belongs to the Dark Lady of Mordor."

"The Dark Lady?" Frodo gasped. "Then, Bilbo, you mustn't go alone! I'll come with you and we can give it back to her and be rid of the thing. Then you could retire and live happily ever after getting fatter and jollier as the days go by."

"Happily ever after..." Bilbo sighed. "That does have a ring to it. And I could finish my book."

"But one cannot simply return the One Ring to Sauron, if it is indeed the One Ring. I think it is, though, and I am hardly ever wrong." Gandalf allowed herself little moment of self-satisfaction. "If she gets her hands on this ring, she could wreak destruction unto Middle-earth, even unto you hobbits, whom I hold so dear."

"She wouldn't do that, surely?" Frodo asked, appalled. "Not if we sat down together and talked things through? I want to give her a chance. We have to believe the best in people."

"Well, all right. If you mind is so set." Gandalf stood up. "I will send for the eagles to take us, if they may. No sense in wasting time trudging all over Middle-earth and working up a sweat. We will make a far batter impression on Sauron if we arrive fresh and alert."

Naruto listened to all these proceedings with his nose in a mud of beer.

---

"Oh, hello there! Visitors! How wonderful!" Sauron waved - that is, she looked from side to side very quickly. An eyeball has no hands. "I'll have Gorbag lay out some tea. Oh no, I can't. I've sent her away with the others."

"The others?" Gandalf asked. "The orcs, you mean?"

"Yes, who else would I be talked about?" Sauron blinked slowly. "You know how women living together tend to synchronise their menstrual cycles? Imagine a hundred thousand orcs with hormonal imbalances all at once. I couldn't handle all the negativity, so I sent them all away."

Gandalf snorted, and Sauron swivelled in her direction.

"Oh, I know what you're thinking," she said. "You're thinking 'old Sauron would know a thing or two about negativity, wouldn't she?'. I'll admit, I've been awful in the past. All that stuff about sinking Numenor and the rings and the war... But you've got to understand! I was under a lot of stress back then! Morgoth was an extremely bad influence, and she used to tell him that I wasn't bad enough for her - that I wouldn't never been bad enough, and so I just got it into my head that I had to be evil."

Sauron squeezed a big fat tear from the corner of her eye. "You have to believe me! You just have to!"

"All deeds will be judged before Illuvatar in the end," Gandalf said quickly, trying to stem the rest of the tears that were obviously welling up. "What truly matters now is what path you choose. Destroy the One Ring of your own accord and put right the misdeeds you have done."

"Destroy the One Ring?" Sauron gasped. "Oh but that thing was a bitch to make, and a bitch and a half to engrave. Can't I sweep up some roads and paint a few walls instead?"

"Let us to do it," Frodo said, speaking up for the first time. She trembled from head to toe, nearly overwhelmed by Sauron's very presence. The ring about her neck felt heavier than it ever had before.

"You've got it, haven't you?" Sauron asked, peering down at Frodo. "Do you think I can look at it for a bit? Just for a little while, to say goodbye. I won't even be able to hold it. Look, no hands."

"Well, if it's just to look..." Frodo pulled at the chain around her neck, drawing the ring up out of her shirt and holding it up for Sauron to see. Gandalf darted at Frodo, trying to stop her, but it was much too late. Sauron let out a shriek of laughter.

"You're doomed! You're all doomed! It's mine one more!" She bounced a little in her excitement. "Oh, tell a sad story and shed a tear and you can get anything you want! Foolish halfling! Now you shall behold the true might of Sauron the deceiver!"

There was a sound like the crack of a whip, and the eye of Sauron disappeared. Sauron's physical form materialised before Frodo, tall and intimidating. Everyone could only watch as Sauron snatched the ring from her grasp and held it aloft.

"And now all of Middle-earth shall be under my command!" She cried, slipping the ring onto her finger.

Nothing happened.

"I said, all of Middle-earth shall be under my command!" Sauron repeated dramatically. Yet more nothing. Finally, Sauron held her hand to her face and studied the ring up close. "This... This isn't the One Ring!"

"I was waiting for you all to notice," Naruto called down from the bridge into Mount Doom.

"Naruto!" Merry yelled. "What've you done?"

"I am a ninja, after all!" Naruto waved cheerily. In his hand glinted the true One Ring. "I swopped the rings while you guys were talking and climbed up here. I figure if I save an entire world they'll have to automaticall make me a Hokage or something!"

"Why you little... Come down here!" Sauron seethed. But her physical form was created for looming majestically and putting weight into great swings of a mace, not for sprinting after little ninja boys.

"I'll just toss it into the fire then!" Naruto called, heading into the very heart of Mount Doom. It was really hot, and he lifted his arm up to shield his eyes - and not a minute too soon. Gollum sank her teeth into his arm and clung on for all she was worth.

"YEOW!" Naruto frantically shook his arm, trying to dislodge Gollum. "Hey! You stop that right now!"

"Gives it back to us! Gives the precious back to us!" Gollum seethed through her teeth, hands scrabbling against Naruto's other arm, trying to reach the ring.

"Damn you!" Naruto sank his own teeth into the side of Gollum's face. Gollum screamed in pain and let go of Naruto, who fell back, rubbing her arm. "I told you to stop!"

"It bit us! No one's ever bitten us back before!" Gollum wailed. "We'll show it biting, yes we will, gollum, gollum." She crouched low. "We'll take back the precious one it's dead!"

"You want it so bad... Here, catch!" Naruto lobbed the ring far out over the cliff and watched as Gollum leapt out over it. He ran to the edge in time to see Gollum sinking deep into the hot lava, a look of bliss on her face.

The entire mountain began to shake, and the stone beneath Naruto's feet began to give way. He ran back out to the entrance and watched as Sauron's physical form crumbled into dust.

"You did it!" Merry yelled. "I can't believe you did it!"

"You better believe it! I'm the best ninja in all of Middle-earth!"

"All of where?" Naruto blinked. He was standing in the training grounds again, and Sakura was staring at him.

"I'm back! Hey, I'm back!" Naruto hopped from foot to foot in his excitement.

"Back from where?" Sasuke asked. "You were just standing there, drooling."

Naruto frowned. The hand seal he had drawn on the ground was still fresh. "But I went to Middle-earth! I turned all the guys into girls, and threw the ring into the volcano, and you have to make me Hokage now because I saved an entire world!"

There was a short silence.

"Don't you guys believe me?" Naruto flailed. "It really happened!"

"Sure, sure." Kakashi yawned and flipped to the next page of Icha Icha Paradise.

Back in Middle-earth, a weeping Ham Gamgee gave away her only daughter Samwise to Rose Cotton while Aragorn broke up with Arwen because it wouldn't be fair to him, clinging on to their selfish love like that.

Challenge #4

Sat, 03 Feb 2007 03:56:38 GMT

HELLO EVERYONE. Sorry for being MIA for so long, but now that we've sorted things out, rest assured we'll be up and running again!

Announcing Challenge #4: the Genderbender AU. Boys become girls, girls become boys. Enough said ;D

Fandoms for Challenge #4.5:

Naruto
Hikaru no Go
Nobuta wo Produce
LOTR
Inuyasha

This challenge will be closed on 17th February, 2007. Have fun! ♥

So, uh.

Wed, 17 Jan 2007 03:55:39 GMT

To the point;

When's the next challenge?

DON'T MAKE ME GO PUPPY DOG EYES ON YOU. I SWEAR I WILL.

I know there's a substantial lack of participation, but that's how these things start off at first, ya'know?

challenge #3

Sat, 30 Dec 2006 17:17:32 GMT

Title: A Christmas Carol
Rating: G
Challenge: #3 - The Christmas Tales AU
Fandom: Death Note
Summary: Death Note version of A Christmas Carol. Light as Ebenezer Scrooge, Misora as the Ghost of Christmas Past, L as the Ghost of Christmas Present, Ryuuk as the Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come.
Notes: Finished in the nick of time!

Click on thumbnail to go to my journal!

You guys, I had a dream where I was checking my flist and got all excited because someone sent a fic in response to a challenge, and then I woke up and found it was not true, and I was so sad. ::pokepoke:: (Yes, my dreams kinda suck.)

Fanart for challenge #3

Sun, 24 Dec 2006 18:32:48 GMT

Title: Mall Santa
Rating: G
Challenge #3: the Christmas Tales AU.
Fandom: Bleach
Characters: Yama-ji (yay!), Ukitake, Yachiru, Hitsugaya, Matsumoto
Summary: Er. Self explanatory, I think. Oh, and Hitsugaya, naturally, is there under protest. And there is much eye twitching.
Notes: -.-' I did not remember the 'tales' part of the challenge, so fail, Jolene, fail. Pretend it's any generic Christmas movie? Will try to make up for it with challenge #3.5 before the deadline.

Click on thumbnail to go to my journal. Crossposted to kurosaki_clinic.

Challenge #3

Fri, 15 Dec 2006 14:59:59 GMT

Now that we're done with the good old boybandy fun, it's time for Challenge #3: the Christmas Tales AU. Yes, in case you (still) haven't noticed, it's That Time Of The Year again! Oh joy and jolly and jingle to the world, and all that jazz. Any Christmas-y tales will do, for example, The Grinch Who Stole Christmas by Dr. Seuss, or that thing with those spirits and haunting and Scrooge. Dump in your favourite characters, and let the eggnog flow, while the rest of us read and laugh and choke on our Christmas log cakes :D

Challenge #3.5 will still be for multi-fandom AUs, but this time, you get to pick the fandoms. It's Christmas, after all.

You have up to 31st Dec 2006 to send in your entries. Merry Christmas!

Fanart for Challenge #2

Fri, 08 Dec 2006 12:52:29 GMT

Title: Boyband
Rating: G (*g*)
Challenge #2: the Boyband AU
Fandom: Ouran High School Host Club

Click on thumbnail to go to my journal.

Cross posted to ouran_host.

Challenge #2

Wed, 29 Nov 2006 06:16:35 GMT

Halo thar, everyone :D Challenge #1 is now closed, and we've got two submissions which were both very crackalicious, so go read 'em if you haven't.

Alrighty. Next up, Challenge #2: the Boyband AU. Rock bands, punk bands, pop stars, gay indie boys, whatever. And no worries if you're planning to have a female member or two, or even form an all-girls band, because that's accepted as well! ~~This should just totally be called the Band AU, haha~~

The fandoms for Challenge #2.5 are:

Ouran High School Host Club
Trinity Blood
One Piece
CLAMP (any series)
Air Gear

This challenge will be closed on 13th December, 2006. Have fun, guys!

P.S. We love feedback, so if you have any suggestions on how to improve this community, please tell us :3 You could also help pimp us out to your friends, because we really don't mind more crack-loving members. We accept everyone! Even the ones with the secret leather fetishes!

Mon, 27 Nov 2006 04:31:10 GMT

Hello everyone!

Please be reminded that the deadline for Challenge #1 is one day away. We're looking forward to your responses ;D

Wed, 15 Nov 2006 04:55:22 GMT

Title: Pirate King Zaraki
Rating: PG-13 for v. mild violence
Challenge #1.5: Multifandom Pirate AU
Fandoms: Bleach, Sailor moon, Death Note, reference to House

"Reports are still coming in about the self-proclaimed 'Pirate King' Zaraki Kenpachi, who appeared off the coast of Japan just two days ago, and who has single-handedly halted its shipping industry. Even military vessels have proven useless against this mysterious man who has been challenging anyone within a twenty metre radius.

"This just in! Five girls have challenged Zaraki Kenpachi to a showdown! We are waiting on confirmation that these are the legendary Sailor Senshi, lead by none other than Sailor moon herself! Let's go live to our reportor on the field. Hoshi, what can you tell us?"

"Well as you can see I'm standing on a dock just twenty-two metres from Pirate King Zaraki's pirate ship. It appears that the girls are in fact the Sailor senshi and they have in fact engaged Zaraki in combat. Here with me is his first mate, Kusajishi Yachiru. Miss Yachiru, can you tell us just what is going on?"

"Ken-chan gets to have an interesting battle today! He's been very bored you know. Guns don't work against us, and all the ships stopped coming close. Those girls fight kind of dirty, without swords or anything, so Ken-chan's sure to have a good time!"

"Thank you, Miss Yachiru. Holy mother of- There's been an explosion! I repeat, there has been an explosion on board the pirate ship! The smoke is clearing... No, the ship has not been damaged. It seems Zaraki has overwhelmed the Sailor senshi and is now trying to tell us something. What is it, Miss Yachiru?"

"Ken-chan says that if anyone with enough power and guts to fight him wants to come and challenge him they should do it soon, because our leave ends tomorrow, and then we'll have to go back to Soul Society, and Yama-chan gets very grumpy about Ken-chan going around saying 'arrgh' and calling people 'matey'. It took a lot of persuasion to get him to let Ken-chan wear the eye patch in the first place, and we had to make up some story about how it eats his excess energy..."

"Um. Right. So. Back to the studio."

Light rolled his pencil between his thumb and forefinger, staring meditatively at the television screen. Power and guts, eh? He flipped open the Death Note and wrote 'Zaraki Kenpachi' on a clean page.

"Won't work." Ryuk informed him.

"Why not?" Light asked, adding that Zaraki should die from a tapeworm infestation brought on by eating undercooked fish and that there shouldn't be any sarcastic infectious disease specialists around to diagnose him.

"He's a shinigami." Ryuk went 'crunch, crunch' and swallowed the rest of his apple.

Light scowled and shut the Death Note. Damn.

OVERACHIEVER YA YA YA

Tue, 14 Nov 2006 04:39:50 GMT

Because I had nothing better to do ~~except English homework~~ and the idea that came to me in the shower was really, really what I needed to do with this. XD

You Know, Whichever by the_asalina
for challenge #1.5: Multi-Fandom Pirate AU
using characters from Sailor Moon, Bleach and Death Note as well as extensive Princess Bride references and a brief, implied mention of Duo Maxwell
rated PG-13 for some swearing and implied sexual circumstances
and probably only funny if you're me or my best friend

The vessel pitched and lurched, with the wind ruffling through the flag sporting its odd crest of a stylized sunburst and a line of unintelligible script, and causing one of its passengers to pitch and lurch - and toss his cookies off the starboard bow.

"Gee whiz, Hawkseye, learn to hold your lunch," scolded one of the other passengers as he reapplied his makeup into a compact mirror.

"Shut up, Fisheye. You've got no right to criticize - you're in your element." He clasped a hand to his stomach again.

"You guys said I got to pick this time, and I think the pirate motif looks really good on all three of us. Lookie, lookie, I've got beads in my hair." He stood up and did a little twirl across the deck, stopping to peer over the muscled soldier of the third passenger. "Mmmm, are you almost done?"

Tigerseye shot him a sideways glance. "Fisheye, if you eat what I caught today, isn't that technically cannibalism?"

"Oh dear, I certainly hope not. It smells really good."

"Go sit down," Hawkseye groaned, "and keep reading your book or something. Just watching you dance around like that is making me -- " His head disappeared over the side of the ship again and retching noises were heard.

"Hey, if he can't keep his lunch down, can I have the rest?"

"Hold your horses, Fisheye!"

The sea continued to roll, and the Amazon Trio and their ship continued to roll with it. Tigerseye poked at his steaming wok, Fisheye flipped another page of his romance novel, and Hawkseye...well, Hawkseye continued to do what he was doing, thankful that he kept his hair short and wouldn't have problems with it like the other two would have.

Suddenly, there was a large BANG sound and the ship pitched and lurched in a whole new direction, knocking Hawkseye away from the railing and, I'm sorry to report, causing him to expend the remainder of his stomach's contents onto the deck of the ship rather than over the side.

"What was that?" Fisheye gasped, panicked.

"I think we've been shot. Look, there's another ship." Tigerseye pointed off a bit to port.

"Inconceivable!" Hawkseye croaked out.

"What if we sink?" Fisheye cried.

"We're not gonna - "

"Are there lifeboats on this thing?" He turned to stare at Tigerseye with wild eyes. "What if there aren't enough?"

"Fisheye - "

"What if you end up getting stuck on one? What if it's just you and that poor little Indian boy?!"

"Fisheye!"

"DOn't do it! Don't do it Richard Parker!!"

"FISHEYE!" Tigerseye swung toward Fisheye to smack him with whatever he had ready, which just so happened to be the spatula he'd been using to stir around the vegetables in his wok. Fisheye winced, but snapped out of it, although he did add "In my defense, you two should read more."

The ship that had shot them approached, and the Amazons could see an angry-looking man with flame-red hair and a loudly patterned shirt that gave him the appearance of a half-pirate, half-flamenco dancer. He did have a particularly scary-looking cutlass in hand, however, so they threw up their hands and prepared to surrender (although Tigerseye held onto the spatula).

The redhead laughed loudly and gestured with his sword. "A'ight, you scum! Hand over all your treasure! I know you got some or you wouldn't be nancin' around in a ship this big with such overpriced-lookin' earrings on!"

"Do you like them?" Fisheye needed to know, brightening up immediately. "I actually made mine myse--"

"Shut up!" the redhead barked. "Don't you bleedin' know who I am?"

Tigerseye looked at Fisheye. Fisheye looked at Hawkseye. Hawkseye looked at the puddle of his own vomit on the deck, had a fleeting vision of himself as a hyena wallowing in it, realized there had already been a Life of Pi reference in this fic, and then turned to look at the redheaded newcomer.

"Hang on," he said slowly. "You're the Dread Pirate Shinigami!"

"That's right, bitches!" the Dread Pirate Shinigami cackled. "Either gimme all your shit right now and end up with a swift and...almost painless death, or it's torture for all eternity for ye in the depths of my own personal hell!" As if on cue, the screams of a young woman could be heard from below the decks of the Dread Pirate Shinigami's ship. (Unfortunately, she was screaming "Oh, yes, Raito, yes!" and the effect was somewhat ruined.)

"Look, we haven't got any real treasure," Tigerseye said in an attempt to be placating. "This whole thing was a gimmick Fisheye thought up for us to take a vacation."

"And to have kinky roleplay sex."

"To take a vacation."

"The cargo hold is full of empty barrels and a few piles of costume jewelry," Hawkseye added. "We got nothin'. Why don't we just write this off as a case of mistaken identity and act like it never happened?"

"I'm afraid that ain't gonna happen," the Dread Pirate Shinigami answered with a particularly nasty grin and the arch of one oddly tattooed eyebrow. "I'm gonna slit yer throats and steal everything you've got, startin' with that fancy fryin' pan there!"

"This shitty thing?" Tigerseye said. "You're welcome to it. It may talk the talk, but it can't really wok the wok."

"Enough of your bad puns!" cried the pirate. "I'm boardin' you and there's nothing you can do about it! Yer gonna rue the day you crossed the Dread Pirate Shinigami!"

"Shut up!" cried another voice from below the deck, and this time a young man with artfully disheveled brown hair and admittedly flushed skin climbed up from below to stand with the other four on the decks. "Would you just shut up already? You're ruining the mood, and you're not even the Dread Pirate Shinigami!"

Fisheye, Tigerseye and Hawkseye gasped in unison (although the sudden intake of breath caused Hawkseye to begin coughing something fierce again). "You're not the real Dread Pirate Shinigami?" Fisheye cried.

The redheaded imposter sighed and slumped against the railing of the deck. "No, I'm not the real Dread Pirate Shinigami. My name is Renji. I was taken aboard by the Dread Pirate Shinigami before me. He was not the real Dread Pirate Shinigami either; he was a weird guy named Ryuk, who had inherited the title from the first Dread Pirate Shinigami. The real Shinigami is retired and living with his boyfriend in a comfortable apartment on L3."

"L3?"

"Don't ask. At any rate, Ryuk captured me, and spent every day for the next three years telling me he was going to kill me."

"With his notebook?" Fisheye asked.

"Hell, no. How the hell do you kill someone with a notebook? No, just standard killing. 'Good night, Renji. Lovely day. Thanks for the apples. I'll most likely kill you in the morning.' It went on and on until one day he told me he was going to retire, and make me the new captain of his ship, the new Dread Pirate Shinigami."

"So before you were the captain..." Hawkseye cut in.

"Yes?"

"Did that mean you were like... the vice captain?"

Renji, as well as everyone else but Hawkseye, smacked his hand to his forehead in defeat.

"But it's all in the name, you see," the brunet boy explained. "No one would surrender to the Dread Pirate Renji."

"I sure as hell would!" called the girl from belowdecks.

"So now that we've established you're not the Dread Pirate Shinigami, you're not scary, pillaging, and evil - "

"Look! Over there! A three-headed monkey!"

" - and that we're not going to make it through this fic without a Monkey Island reference, can you please just leave us alone to take our vacation - "

"And have kinky roleplay sex!"

" - and take our vacation in peace?" Tigerseye finally ground out.

"I guess we might be able to work something out..." Renji agreed. "But you still have to give me something."

"Er...we've got a little bit of rum left," Tigerseye offered.

Renji pondered this for a moment, and then snapped his fingers. "The bit of rum, and the wok."

"Done."

The trade was made, the opposing ship sailed off, and the Amazon Trio continued to have a relatively dilemma-free vacation.

Or have kinky roleplay sex. You know, whichever.

Tue, 14 Nov 2006 02:32:25 GMT

HI EVERYONE. WELCOME TO crack_aus! I HOPE YOU HAVE FUN :D

Presenting to you,

Challenge #1: The Pirate AU

Challenge #1.5: The Multi-Fandom Pirate AU
Fandoms:
- Death Note
- Bleach
- Sailormoon
- House
- Prince of Tennis

The challenge closes on the 28th of November, 2006.

Please read The Rules Post before posting!

RULES, and other General Matters

Sat, 21 Oct 2006 09:23:00 GMT

GENERAL INFO: (or: WHAT YOU SHOULD KNOW BEFORE YOU READ ANY FURTHER)

1. This is a challenge community, which means, we post a challenge, you write/draw/whatever little artsy thing tickles your fancy.

2. This is a challenge community for crack Alternate Universes (hence the community name crack_aus hahaha aren't we just Genious), which means you write/draw/something about characters/people from anime/manga/TV/film/anywhere in the world, really, but in an alternate universe.

3. It has to be crack, i.e. ridiculous, preposterous, and preferrably, hilarious.

RULES: (or: HOW THE HELL THIS THING WORKS)

1. Every two weeks, a new challenge will be posted. The challenge will look something like this:

Challenge #00: The Army AU.

Challenge #00.5: The Multi-Fandom Army AU.
Fandoms
Bleach
Grey's Anatomy
Johnny's Entertainment
Death Note
Loveless

Deadline: 31st February 1980

2. There are two components to every challenge, as follows:

- The first component (e.g. Challenge #00) is a general one, which means all crack from any fandom is accepted.

- The second component (e.g. Challenge #00.5, note the ".5") is a more specific one, which means only crack from two or more fandoms at once is accepted. The mods (aziraphale_mel and postcognitive) will put up a list of 5 fandoms at random. You are to pick two or more fandoms from this list, and use them in the AU. You may not use any fandom other than the 5 provided.

3. You may write/draw/something for either component, there is no need to do both (but nothing is stopping you, so you may write/draw/something both if you so wish, or if you've smoked too much pot).

4. When posting, please include "challenge #XX" under "Tags". This is for the sake of keeping order in the complete chaos that utter crack can so brilliantly inspire.

5. Please keep all images and fics behind a cut (fake cuts are also fine), and include warnings if they are not worksafe, or if they include mature content. "WARNING: MAJOR CRACK" is not valid.

Comment on this post, if you have any questions. :D