Dear idiot online last night.

Thank you for joining us in our World of Warcraft raid when one of our regulars dropped out, you were fast, efficient and very good for about an hour.
Then you went absolutely bonkers, running around into groups of bad guys, jumping about the place and getting us all killed by your actions about 5 times. Your dumb behavior went on for 25 minutes before we decided to boot you out and just do the rest of the raid with one less person, although we'll keep the combat logs because the bit where you ran into the ooze twice was quite funny.

So it was excellent fun to get a comment straight afterward that you had decided to let your 4 year old kid take control of your character and we were totally horrible people for kicking you out of the group just because a kid was in charge. "She was just having FUN!" you claimed, "don't take this game so seriously!". So wasting the time and repair bills of 24 other people is 'fun'

But thank you for your last message which caused us all to completely lose it in fits of laughter over the Vent server when read out:

"BTW, i bet ur all GAY! Games r 4 KIDS! who the hell stays up till 12pm playing computer games??!!! SADDOS"

Well....you and your daughter for a start :p

(Additional: the inlaws DID knock on the front door last night but I ignored them and they don't have a spare key :p)

Dennis Leary is my hero for this. The part with the B.B. Gun is priceless, and I'd give up a finger to be allowed to do this. Not work safe by the way, lots of cursing and swearing involved.

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Background: I have a lot of electronics and computing equipment in my house because a) I'm a geek and b) it's my job. It is all very well looked after but I have big problems with anyone else messing with it.

Today I got a message over IM from my in-laws demanding that I bring up one of my computers to their house. Why? Because they've got the grandchildren visiting and the kids want to play some games on a PC.
No, sorry. I replied. None of my machines are easily transportable (true, my smallest gaming rig is something I can't even lift) and besides which, I am not happy having children play with thousands of pounds worth of my equipment. I think I suggested plasticine might be a better thing to keep them occupied.

The response I got back I will paraphrase to remove personal details:

When you married into this family, everything that is yours became the property of the family, therefore it is your duty to share. We will be down later to collect the kit.

Hmm, later this evening I think I will be ignoring any knocks on the door..I've got a World of Warcraft raid to do anyway :p

I feel kinda bad for posting twice in the same week, but I also felt I should share.

From what I've read here, there are very rarely positive reactions to announcing a CF lifestyle choice, especially to family. Well, last night, I plucked up my courage and announced to my father as we were driving that I didn't want to have any children. I sort of built up to it. The conversation went something like,

Me: "You know, raising a child these days is so expensive, what with clothing, food, school supplies, health insurance, college tuition, etc."

Dad: "Yup, sure is."

"And I think people who have children have way more stress in their lives, and they probably age faster..."

"Probably."

"So the argument for being CF just seems to build and build..."

"Yes, it certainly does. In fact, I would highly recommend being child free to both you and your sister."

Now, not only was I surprised that my father new what CF meant, but that he actually ENCOURAGES it! I totally didn't expect that! I'm pretty sure that I just stared at him for a minute, then said, "What?" and he goes,

"Yeah, well, you'll have more money, more time, I know you like to travel, so you won't be tied down..."

Me: "But... but... don't you want to be a grandpa?" (keep in mind, I wasn't trying to change his mind about being supportive, I was just really f-ing surprised)

Dad: "No, that's not really an important part of my identity."

I was so freaking overjoyed that when we got home, I immediately went to my mother and said, "I've officially decided to have no children."

And she looks at me and says, "OK." JUST LIKE THAT!!

I go, "Um... aren't you disappointed? Don't you want grandkids?"

She goes, "Well, I'm sure if I had grandkids I'd love them, but I mean, it's really your choice. I don't feel very strongly about it one way or the other."

Holy Moses. I think I just realized for the first time in twenty years how freakin' awesome my parents are. BOTH are supportive of my CF lifestyle, just like that, no questions asked.

Now if they would only stop yelling at each other. :/

I was in my developmental psych class (which has been SO much about children and having children that it's kind of painful), and the teacher was discussing the decision-making pressure women are under about whether to have a career first, or whether to have kids first. I was going to say something about people who just don't have kids, but he got there first. He said that there were some women who chose to just focus on their career. He asked if there were any in the class, and I raised my hand. He asked me if I would mind sharing why. I just said I'd never wanted to be a parent, I wouldn't be a good parent, I'm way too logical and unemotional, and I just don't want to. Nobody really said anything bad, which was nice, but this girl behind me who I know has at least one kid said "Well at least she admits it!" I thought that was kind of awesome. :)

Kay, so, this is a simple little post, just to be optimistic and cheering to those who may need it(myself included). Just wanted to say that I am currently unemployed and thus have been spending much time at home. I am now typing at the computer and being perfectly assaulted by my kitty cat, who is purring so hard she is drooling, and stepping all over my keyboard because I stopped petting her (apologies for any typos). I have been sleeping odd hours (staying up til 6 and then going to breakfast and coming back to sleep? FTW), catching up on schoolwork and housekeeping (well, sorta), and playing videogames(L4D rocks!) since I finally have the time to do so since I don't know how long. And unlike so many of my other friends, I do not have little sproglings running about helter skelter, ruining any chance I have at peace and quiet and a life of my own. I am not dying wondering how I am going to keep supper on the table for anyone other than myself and my fabulous fiance. I can experiment with new recipes and eat all the tofu and mushrooms I want without ever once hearing "Oh yuckie! NO!" I can even randomly take a roadtrip, have a night on the town, go hiking, or play with my dogs without having to wait for naptime or a babysitter or taking forever bundling anyone up and dragging half my house with me to do so. My childfree life is beautiful. For this, I am profoundly grateful and joyous.

cross-posted to cf hardcore, childfree, chilfree_zone, and my journal. =^_^=

Seriously?

I know it's a Friday Night and you want a break from being a mom but that does NOT mean that you should bring your 5+ kids to a restaurant and let your two toddlers play Ring-Around-The-Rosie in the aisle while people are getting up to go to the buffet and bringing back food! Oh wait, I'm sorry, you're on your fucking cell phone, you stupid bitch. Too busy looking for baby daddy #6?

It was terrible. Between all her kids yelling and screwing around, they played games in the aisle and right next to our booth. They almost knocked down a waitress while she was cleaning up and practically barreled into an old lady who was in a walker! They were running all over the restaurant and buffet. And did the mother do anything besides tell her kids to get back to the table? No. Of course not, because that involves actual parenting.

And the youngest little girl who smelled like urine walked up to our booth and just stared at us. It was very strange and we felt so uncomfortable.

They left half an hour later and left their table looking like someone had thrown up on it. I'm sorry, I might have been in a grumpy mood at first as I am on anti-biotics right now but I don't need your snot-nosed brats moving my seat and making me more irritated. And NO one said anything about the brats. They all laughed and chuckled. My waitress brought me free drink though but that's not the point.

If I had acted like that at a restaurant with my parents, I would have been taken to the car and beaten in the backseat. My mom inspired fear with just a look. She had us sitting in our seats and we always asked politely for anything. We never shrieked or spoke out of line and we were CLEAN. As in, we didn't smell like a dirty diaper! What is it with breeders? If you're going to have kids, please have the decency to learn how to control them. Don't let other people suffer simply because you're too tired to do something you chose you wanted in your life.

I was reading a book where the MC became pregnant, and it made me wonder... let's suspend reality for a moment. If you did decide to have kids the "natural" way (i.e., by getting pregnant and giving birth yourself/with your partner), do you think you would want to know the sex of the baby beforehand? Or would you want to wait until the birth?

I know it seems like a strange question, but I'm really curious.

Just wondering if this was going on again this year?

So I was reading my sociology textbook yesterday. We are on the chapter about the family. The books goes on about the traditional family, the single parent family, the extended family, etc, etc. There is a section about gay families, people who choose to stay single, and people who live together but don't get married.

And then... Just when I was starting to lose hope... I see "Marriages without Children".

"More and more couples today ... chose not to have children and regard themselves as child-free rather than childless. They do not believe that having children automatically follows from marriage, nor do they feel that reproduction is the duty of all married couples."

Right there. In my textbook. Yeah baby!!

Ok so you don't HAVE to be married to be childfree, but I was pleasantly surprised to see that AT ALL.

So in the online class discussion I posted my thoughts on the matter and how pleased I was to see it "officially" recognized in a sociology textbook. So far I got one message from a father of two who respects the decisions of people who choose not to breed.

First of all, I know. I bring these things onto myself. I'm that brand of idiot that goes out the day before Thanksgiving and Christmas, not because I really need something, but just for shit and giggles. I've made it a personal goal to, one of these years, get a Black Friday to myself just to go to the malls and sit there and see just how bad they are. Last year, I asked for Easter off and then, instead of getting my candy earlier, went to Walmart the day before. I almost got hit by two different cars on my way out of the parking lot but I got my candy, damnit!

So, yes, I knew this would be a crowded mess and I went anyway. Still had a good time, but I still couldn't get over this. And as much as I'd love to write to the local papers, I'll never get away with it without being lynched, so here goes...

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Well...I saw my doctor today for my post-op appointment...HE AGREED TO DO ESSURE ON ME!!!!! I talked about how i've never wanted childen, i've reseached such and such methods, etc. He did not ask me why, he simply said "ok!" Previously, he said he was hesitant to do it on me. He explained something, but I don't remember what it was. I totally tuned that out because of the shock I experienced. But, I will be waiting until after the first of the year. Due to the fact I had surgery, my doctor wants to let me finish healing. I totally respect that and am cool with that. If you want the name/number of my GYN, let me know. :-)

I was at Sears today to pickup a shirt I ordered. And on my out, I came across the girls' clothing section. Only, it didn't seem like clothes for girls, more like clothes for women around my age & perhaps even older. Although it hasn't always been this way, in fact when I was a kid, kids' clothes looked like, well kids' clothes. Which makes me wonder, why are clothes for young girls made to look like womens' clothes?

Just want to rant to those who will be understanding, since most people I try and complain about the kids to just think I am exaggerating because I am childfree...

I work in an elementary school in a 3rd grade classroom. I am a PCP, which is a person who stays with one student in a classroom who needs extra help/assistance/etc.
The boy I work with has high-functioning autism, and he is an absolutely wonderful kid. I couldn't ask for a better child to be assigned to. He is extremely smart, does all his work, and has great manners.
Too bad I cannot say the same for about 99% of the rest of the kids!

I don't know if anyone else here works in schools or has any kind of experience with school kids, so I don't know if it's just my area (though I doubt it!) but OMG it can be a nightmare!
As soon as I walk into the classroom, I can't even think straight because the kids are so loud, screaming, jumping all over the place, etc.
No matter what myself or the teacher, or even the principal do, it is extremely difficult to get these kids under control.

The kids have absolutely no concept of manners, respect, or discipline. They come to school thinking the entire day is recess and they don't have to listen to anyone (which, I know, starts at home where the parents let them get their way 24/7).

If one of us tries to get this one kid to do his work he'll say stuff like "I don't have to listen to you! This is a free country for men, not women!"

Then there's the kid in 2nd grade who tells people their mother sucked his dick for kool-aid.

Oh and threatening to chop off other kid's penises.

And the 4th grade boy who was grabbing other girls' chests.

And the 3rd graders who broke into another kids house wanting to beat him up.

And just the constant loudness and disrespect. They laugh at you when you try and get them to behave because it's something they see as a joke. They are not supposed to learn or respect elders. They are there to goof off with their friends, and hurt each other.

The best thing I can say about the school I am currently in (aside from getting along great with a genuinely nice staff of people) is that we are at least allowed to yell at the kids and try to get them to behave.
The school I was at my first year doing this, you were never allowed to yell at or use any kind of negative discipline on a kid...
If a kid was throwing a tantrum, they expected the faculty to find something to compliment rather than yell at them for the tantrum. They went as far as to tell us to tell them they are doing a good job breathing if that was the only good thing you can compliment them on....
I remember my first kid I was assigned to would beat me up- literally punch and kick me. I had to use force even though I was technically not allowed... I was not going to sit there in pain while an 8-yr-old kicked me and tell he how lovely the shirt was she had on....

It's also sad hearing the kids' conversations. They aren't the fun cartoon/toy/etc. conversations I used to have with my 2nd and 3rd grade friends. The other day in the cafeteria the little boys were discussing over lunch, whether they would rather have money or women....
And if you ask them about a Disney movie or fantasy/sci-fi stuff like Star Wars they look at you weird b/c they only see 'cool' movies like 'Saw'.

They don't want to do any work. They will complain and tell the teachers they are ruining their lives and they want to go to a different school where it isn't so bossy. They rarely do their homework either.

Of course the parents are the ones really at fault which I see very much at this job as well. One little boy walks into school an hour late and says that his mom wanted to sleep longer so didn't get him up on time. Another girl and her 2 siblings are constantly late and absent b/c the mother has better things to do. One kid is constantly daydreaming or whatever and his mom and grandma are recovering drug addicts. One girl's mother comes to parent-teacher meetings with a dirty old budweiser t-shirt. And the kid who comes to school with no socks b/c his mom hasn't done the laundry. Or the kid who is supposed to be on medication for his violence, but his mom takes them instead. etc etc etc.....



The saddest thing is, nothing legally gets done about any of it...

Nothing is blamed on the parenting. It's always a medical issue... Every kid is all of a sudden special ed, or add, etc. When I was in school, me and all my friends had good parents that raised us well and there wasn't all of this classification. Now-a-days we just have a bunch of parents who don't give a crap. They give birth and that is it. They breed just because they are 'supposed to' and leave the kids to exist on their own without any rules or love. It is extremely aggravating.

Being 33 I have a ton of high school "acquaintances" who have friended me on facebook with kids by now. Fine enough. However why do so many of them have pictures of their kids as their profile picture? Not having or wanting kids the idea just doesn't mesh in my mind. Seems odd to have Beth XYZ who I don't know from the lady down the street contacts me saying "oh Hi I just found you on FB and thought we could re-connect". This all coming from what appears to be a 5yr old boy.

No one has to speculate as to why this is, it's more of a small bothersome event in my life that I just wanted to share.

I'm taking a Welsh history course atm, and I've just got to the bit about women (we have our own section because most history doesn't bother with us). It's mostly focusing on the 20th century, and it really is quite depressing, particularly the bits about contraception in the thirties. There's a letter to Marie Stops from a mother of thirteen (seven lived) who begs to know how she can help having any more children. A quote from Stella Brown about women who say "you've come too late to help me, comrade, but give me some papers for my girls. I don't want them to have the life I've had." A newspaper article from the Daily Herald, which quotes doctors claiming that contraception is bad for the health.

I'm reminded of a quote from Mona Lisa smile "look back and see how far we've come." We really have.

Also, a bit worried about something.

( TMI )

Test was negative!

So my sister, Tyffani, had a kid a few months ago.

We don't talk, so I didn't even know the kids name (and I really could care less about it). I wasn't informed of the gender, really, but had heard through the grapevines that she had the kid, and that was as far as I'd heard.

So out of the blue, she sends me a message over AIM, telling me that 'Lexi is 3 months old now!'

I didn't say anything back. So she says, 'Crazy, huh'

And I said, "Sure."


OMG. She got SO MAD that I just didn't want to know all these little details about her pwecious, so she starts IM'ing me about what a bitch I am, how I think I'm better than the rest of the family, why don't I care about my niece, why didn't I go see her (WTF, she lives in OK, and I'm in FL.... a long way to go for a kid I care nothing about), and lastly, 'I NEED HELP'

UGH. Just... NO. My message to her was, "Look. When you want to call me just to talk about how my dog is doing in class - that's when I'll talk to you about how your kid is doing. Until then, fuck off."

Her last message was 'You're such a stuck up bitch! I should have known not to ask YOU for help!'

So I told her, "Well, duh. Why would I want to help you because you can't figure out how to properly use birth control?"

To which she responds, "I DIDN'T HAVE ANY MONEY!"


....

I just... no. At this point I can't even talk to her anymore, so I logged off. Didn't have money for BC, so you have a baby. Intelligent.

Hi all! My name is Amanda. I'm 23 and I'm a dyscalculic Pagan belly dancing chick from NYC; I'm so glad I found you guys. I've never really liked children but it wasn't until I hit 17 or 18 years old that I decided that nope, kids are NOT in my future. At all. Ever.

( Department of Backstory time )

It's gotten to the point where I just try to do my own thing and just hope and pray that someone hires me ASAP. If I ever wanted kids, I think this just sealed the deal firmly in the "hell no" category.

My dysfunctional family: making me childfree since I was 18 haha.

I'm starting to really hate those Flip Mino camera commercials. It's always what is supposed to be videos made by normal people with their Flip cameras. They usually aren't too bad. Usually. One that managed to get turned into a commercial is a video called "Screaming Contest". Two small children, one with some form of food mush all over her face, just making annoying screaming-type noises. The older child is doing most of the screaming and then the little sister joins in near the end.

Why do they think this makes a good commercial? Why do they think this makes people want to run out and buy these cameras? I sure as hell don't have any interest in buying it after seeing this on TV.

Why is it that submitting a picture of your kid or voting for a "cute kid" is the best idea for a contest they had?

http://www.e85challenge.com/flexfuelchallenge/

Dawn