Every time my husband and I walk by a screaming child, my husband shakes his head and says (between us, obviously) "Learn to hit your children!"
We're a firm believer that a good smack can adequately deter a child from poor behavior. And frankly, I think it's true, because we've (we=society) created a monster in children by likening spanking your children with child abuse. These days, if a parent taps a kid on the bum, and someone sees, you might end up with CPS at your door investigating a child-abuse claim from some nosey neighbor.
Even just a couple of decades ago when my husband and I were being raised, it was more acceptable to hit your kids, and I was a well behaved child with the fear of a good smack in me. Screw putting the fear of God in kids... fear the hand :P I had zero reason to misbehave when I knew 100% what the punishment was going to be if I wanted to act like a retard... (can I even SAY retard anymore? Damn PC lingo...) -- You would NOT have caught me screaming or running around in a department store... or if I did? You can be damn sure that would be the first and LAST time I would ever attempt crap like that. Ever.
I also learned to fear "the stare" from my mother. I had an appropriate fear of my mother's look, that look she gave me when I knew I was going in the wrong direction behavior-wise, and if I took one more step in that direction, the crap would hit the fan. So really, physical punishment was only a temporary stop that transitioned into fearing the knowledge of what could happen if I were to misbehave. As a result, I really didn't need to endure very much of that physical punishment at all. I learned to behave quickly, and therefor that was that. No one "abused" me by hitting me. They taught me, I learned, and I was better off for it.
Rewind another generation when my mother was growing up, oh boy... you didn't dare have a hair out of place. Don't even get me started on my grandmother's childhood, of which I've heard much about.
Going back egeneration after generation in my own family, I can see the respect of children for their elders growing as we go back in time, when parents were more strict, and when physical punishment was the norm. As time progresses forward, "respect" from children is dropping off like flies. And the parents who actually want to be strict, are criticized for "stifling" their children, or worse: abusing them.
Please... we're raising a bunch of emo sap children who can't stand a little criticism or appropriate re-direction to correct behavior, and grow up to run off to their rooms to cut themselves and cry (I have a pretty severe anxiety disorder, I'm not making fun of mental illness here, but some of what kids do today is bred and raised into them these days as far as I'm concerned). I can't imagine my grandmother being "emo" in her day. Her father would have smacked the emo right out of her.
But today, the kid him or herself would probably call CPS! That right there is the epitomy of disrespect bred into children these days... when the child calls CPS. Wow.
Yeah, some psychos out there abuse their kids, but ya know, that was happening anyway, and it'll happen regardless as time goes on as well. Silently outlawing hitting your kids as an appropriate form of punishment for misbehaving has not solved the problem... in fact, it seems to only be getting worse.
So why oh why society seems to think spanking and physical punishment seems to be some "massive problem", I just don't know.
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
We're a firm believer that a good smack can adequately deter a child from poor behavior. And frankly, I think it's true, because we've (we=society) created a monster in children by likening spanking your children with child abuse. These days, if a parent taps a kid on the bum, and someone sees, you might end up with CPS at your door investigating a child-abuse claim from some nosey neighbor.
Even just a couple of decades ago when my husband and I were being raised, it was more acceptable to hit your kids, and I was a well behaved child with the fear of a good smack in me. Screw putting the fear of God in kids... fear the hand :P I had zero reason to misbehave when I knew 100% what the punishment was going to be if I wanted to act like a retard... (can I even SAY retard anymore? Damn PC lingo...) -- You would NOT have caught me screaming or running around in a department store... or if I did? You can be damn sure that would be the first and LAST time I would ever attempt crap like that. Ever.
I also learned to fear "the stare" from my mother. I had an appropriate fear of my mother's look, that look she gave me when I knew I was going in the wrong direction behavior-wise, and if I took one more step in that direction, the crap would hit the fan. So really, physical punishment was only a temporary stop that transitioned into fearing the knowledge of what could happen if I were to misbehave. As a result, I really didn't need to endure very much of that physical punishment at all. I learned to behave quickly, and therefor that was that. No one "abused" me by hitting me. They taught me, I learned, and I was better off for it.
Rewind another generation when my mother was growing up, oh boy... you didn't dare have a hair out of place. Don't even get me started on my grandmother's childhood, of which I've heard much about.
Going back egeneration after generation in my own family, I can see the respect of children for their elders growing as we go back in time, when parents were more strict, and when physical punishment was the norm. As time progresses forward, "respect" from children is dropping off like flies. And the parents who actually want to be strict, are criticized for "stifling" their children, or worse: abusing them.
Please... we're raising a bunch of emo sap children who can't stand a little criticism or appropriate re-direction to correct behavior, and grow up to run off to their rooms to cut themselves and cry (I have a pretty severe anxiety disorder, I'm not making fun of mental illness here, but some of what kids do today is bred and raised into them these days as far as I'm concerned). I can't imagine my grandmother being "emo" in her day. Her father would have smacked the emo right out of her.
But today, the kid him or herself would probably call CPS! That right there is the epitomy of disrespect bred into children these days... when the child calls CPS. Wow.
Yeah, some psychos out there abuse their kids, but ya know, that was happening anyway, and it'll happen regardless as time goes on as well. Silently outlawing hitting your kids as an appropriate form of punishment for misbehaving has not solved the problem... in fact, it seems to only be getting worse.
So why oh why society seems to think spanking and physical punishment seems to be some "massive problem", I just don't know.
I was going into work yesterday when I nearly ran over two kids. They were riding in one of those barbie jeep car things in their yard. I saw them when I was coming up, and so I thought they weren't going to do anything. Yeah. Wishful thinking. As soon as I get close, they suddenly decide that now would be an excellent time to drive across the street. I'm blind from my left eye, and they came from the left side. I slammed on my breaks and honked my horn. Did they care? Nope. I got a dirty look from them and they kept going.
Yeah you little shits, you're lucky I was going under 30 mph, and I just had my breaks changed. My old ones were terrible. I was so close to hitting them, my suv's nose was bearing down on them. And they didn't care. And when I looked in my rearview no one ever peeked out from the houses to see what happened. Good job people.
------
And now for something completely different. I met what could possibly be the perfect kid, or maybe he was a robot. Yeah, he probably was a robot. It's so hard to believe a kid could be this well behaved. I had a lady call me to come look after her 9 year old while she and her husband were out of town for two days. He was absolutely perfect and respectful when they were there. I was a bit skeptical how he would act while they were gone, but I was just blown away.
Everything was "yes ma'am", "no ma'am" and "may I play my game, ma'am?" Yes, he asked to play the Wii, and he didn't even ask often. He mostly was outside with the animals and training the dogs. Then after I made food for him, he would thank me and do the dishes without me having to tell him.
I think his parents definitely need to teach parenting classes, because they are definitely doing something right!
Yeah you little shits, you're lucky I was going under 30 mph, and I just had my breaks changed. My old ones were terrible. I was so close to hitting them, my suv's nose was bearing down on them. And they didn't care. And when I looked in my rearview no one ever peeked out from the houses to see what happened. Good job people.
------
And now for something completely different. I met what could possibly be the perfect kid, or maybe he was a robot. Yeah, he probably was a robot. It's so hard to believe a kid could be this well behaved. I had a lady call me to come look after her 9 year old while she and her husband were out of town for two days. He was absolutely perfect and respectful when they were there. I was a bit skeptical how he would act while they were gone, but I was just blown away.
Everything was "yes ma'am", "no ma'am" and "may I play my game, ma'am?" Yes, he asked to play the Wii, and he didn't even ask often. He mostly was outside with the animals and training the dogs. Then after I made food for him, he would thank me and do the dishes without me having to tell him.
I think his parents definitely need to teach parenting classes, because they are definitely doing something right!
I love flyers. I have fond memories growing up of weeding through the flyers every morning with my mom, I'd get up early on a Sunday just to run to the end of the very long dirt driveway to grab the huge bundle of flyers that came once a week (our paperboy was far too lazy to walk all the way down our driveway, or pressed for time, or a combination of both :P)
Back then, it was toys or brightly colored things that attracted my attention, but as I got older I just enjoyed bargain-hunting or just leisurely browsing through flyers for ideas on where our extra money might go next... and I still do to love it to this day.
What I abhor however? Is 10 pages out of a perfectly good 20 page flyer... dedicated to baby crap. Page after page after page, I kept turning and turning just now trying to figure out when it would end... strollers and cribs and clothing with not-so-cute sayings on the front, bottles and toys and diapers, it never ends!
Well, it -did- end, but it left me annoyed that I walked down a whole flight of stairs to the complex lobby for this. Please... you're a huge-ass box store. I know you have more stuff on sale than this... can we cut the crap and get to the goods? It's one department in a big store. And this has been growing as a more-or-less weekly occurrence now, where as it was blissfully once every few months max, toted "baby dayz" or "baby week" or some other more-than-obvious title for the sale in question. But now, every week seems to be Baby Week.
When is it "adults who don't give a crap about kids" week, exactly...
I guess I'd need a liquor store flyer for that :P
(cross-posted to Journal)
Back then, it was toys or brightly colored things that attracted my attention, but as I got older I just enjoyed bargain-hunting or just leisurely browsing through flyers for ideas on where our extra money might go next... and I still do to love it to this day.
What I abhor however? Is 10 pages out of a perfectly good 20 page flyer... dedicated to baby crap. Page after page after page, I kept turning and turning just now trying to figure out when it would end... strollers and cribs and clothing with not-so-cute sayings on the front, bottles and toys and diapers, it never ends!
Well, it -did- end, but it left me annoyed that I walked down a whole flight of stairs to the complex lobby for this. Please... you're a huge-ass box store. I know you have more stuff on sale than this... can we cut the crap and get to the goods? It's one department in a big store. And this has been growing as a more-or-less weekly occurrence now, where as it was blissfully once every few months max, toted "baby dayz" or "baby week" or some other more-than-obvious title for the sale in question. But now, every week seems to be Baby Week.
When is it "adults who don't give a crap about kids" week, exactly...
I guess I'd need a liquor store flyer for that :P
(cross-posted to Journal)
- Mood:
apathetic
Here is a story dictated to me by my sister. These are her words:
Here's a perfect example of spoiled children. For the past few weeks at my work place, [she works at our local library], there's a certain room in the children's section that's dedicated to arts and crafts. Usually the crafts change each week, and they're not too bad. The only problem is, once a week, SOMEONE (a child or children) will leave a GIANT mess that I or another librarian would have to clean up. For example, when there was a newspaper craft once, the paper was thrown everywhere, the glue caps and crayons were thrown on the ground, things were not in their proper placement, and it would be spread out all over the tables so there would be no working space.
Today was the breaking point.
I didn't see the actual mess myself, but there were four-count 'em, FOUR-librarians cleaning and scrubbing the crafts room with soap, which I'm guessing is for the glue and tape on the tables. They were TICKED. Just when the library was closing, my manager decided to make a call to the mother of the children, pretty much saying that the woman's children were now banned from the library. Turns out these children were responsible for most of the messes in the crafts room. I have to say, it takes quite a lack of discipline for your children to be thrown out of a library. I'm guessing they were around the ages 4 to 8. The children also for some reason decided to mess up the bathroom. I didn't see that either but I don't want to think about it.
What's the lesson today? Parents, either your give your children enough discipline so they won't make such a mess in a public place, or never let them leave the house.
End of her words.
I now tell her that this is kinda what we've been saying here at Childfree. :D She says she think she'll watch this com, even though she says she wants children, but plans to adopt and to discipline them. (She says she likes a good "children are stupid" story.)
Here's a perfect example of spoiled children. For the past few weeks at my work place, [she works at our local library], there's a certain room in the children's section that's dedicated to arts and crafts. Usually the crafts change each week, and they're not too bad. The only problem is, once a week, SOMEONE (a child or children) will leave a GIANT mess that I or another librarian would have to clean up. For example, when there was a newspaper craft once, the paper was thrown everywhere, the glue caps and crayons were thrown on the ground, things were not in their proper placement, and it would be spread out all over the tables so there would be no working space.
Today was the breaking point.
I didn't see the actual mess myself, but there were four-count 'em, FOUR-librarians cleaning and scrubbing the crafts room with soap, which I'm guessing is for the glue and tape on the tables. They were TICKED. Just when the library was closing, my manager decided to make a call to the mother of the children, pretty much saying that the woman's children were now banned from the library. Turns out these children were responsible for most of the messes in the crafts room. I have to say, it takes quite a lack of discipline for your children to be thrown out of a library. I'm guessing they were around the ages 4 to 8. The children also for some reason decided to mess up the bathroom. I didn't see that either but I don't want to think about it.
What's the lesson today? Parents, either your give your children enough discipline so they won't make such a mess in a public place, or never let them leave the house.
End of her words.
I now tell her that this is kinda what we've been saying here at Childfree. :D She says she think she'll watch this com, even though she says she wants children, but plans to adopt and to discipline them. (She says she likes a good "children are stupid" story.)
I love my work environment. My coworkers and supervisors are awesome. We have lots of fun random chats and love to joke around with each other. I am living the life :)
Characters: Me, Coworker (Mom with 6 month old), and my Project Leader (Male)
Coworker: *laughs*
Me: but they get bigger... and uglier..... Then they start talking and mouth off at you...
Coworker: *still laughing*
Me: Next thing you know, they're wrecking your car...
Coworker: That is true!
Me: This is why I like hamsters. They stay cute, they don't talk, and they can eat and poop all on their own.
Project Leader: (Overhears us) So when are YOU having them?
Me: Having what?
Project Leader: Having kids wreck your car. *sly grin*
Me: Oh. I'm not having kids.
Project Leader: Oh?
Me: I physically CAN'T have kids.
Project Leader: Oh...
Me: Yep...
*crickets chirping*
Coworker and I laugh while Project Leader looks uncomfortable...
Poor guy :P
Edit: I got Essured :)We're at Superstore, and we've paid for our groceries and have checked out, and are headed for the door. We each have our hands full of bags.
Ahead of us is a young-ish couple with two boys (not sure on ages, but old enough to run around and cause trouble). The parents let them run rampant back and forth across the aisles, zig-zagging everywhere chasing each other, BEHIND the parents might I add (not even in sight!)
One of the boys, not even looking, runs straight into me at full speed with my hands full of bags (it's not like I could have stopped him or dove out of the way in that condition -- not that I would have anyway, smack into me for all I care, gives me a more public reason to loathe you), I actually made a high-pitched yelp because I was just so shocked that this kid -bolted- right into me.
The parents turned around (they were WAY far ahead of their kids at this point). You know what they did? They giggled to each other, and pushed the cart faster and ran off. This kid was left standing here staring up at me, then ran off with his brother to catch up to the parents!
No apology (the kid was young, but old enough to say "sorry"), no responsibility from the parents (holy crap they ran away from their own kids, what the hell?), no sanity.
Incredible.
We later saw the parents outside near our car loading their little "bundles of joy" and groceries into their awesome minivan. I shook my head at them. They noticed. They did not giggle. I hope they were embarassed.
Ahead of us is a young-ish couple with two boys (not sure on ages, but old enough to run around and cause trouble). The parents let them run rampant back and forth across the aisles, zig-zagging everywhere chasing each other, BEHIND the parents might I add (not even in sight!)
One of the boys, not even looking, runs straight into me at full speed with my hands full of bags (it's not like I could have stopped him or dove out of the way in that condition -- not that I would have anyway, smack into me for all I care, gives me a more public reason to loathe you), I actually made a high-pitched yelp because I was just so shocked that this kid -bolted- right into me.
The parents turned around (they were WAY far ahead of their kids at this point). You know what they did? They giggled to each other, and pushed the cart faster and ran off. This kid was left standing here staring up at me, then ran off with his brother to catch up to the parents!
No apology (the kid was young, but old enough to say "sorry"), no responsibility from the parents (holy crap they ran away from their own kids, what the hell?), no sanity.
Incredible.
We later saw the parents outside near our car loading their little "bundles of joy" and groceries into their awesome minivan. I shook my head at them. They noticed. They did not giggle. I hope they were embarassed.
Just a quick thing: over at Cute Overload there's a video showing a mother sea lion teaching her baby to swim. They note a couple of things that happen at different points in the video, and the note for 53 seconds in is "(Temporary loss of cuteness. Please stand by.)"
What happens at 53 seconds into the video? It shows some children watching the sea lions.
What happens at 53 seconds into the video? It shows some children watching the sea lions.
so, I'm watching this movie (Sidewalks of New York - it's one of those ones about eight people linked through romantic relationships, like Love Actually, or He's Just Not That Into You, only older).
There's a childfree character! Unfortunately, she's only in it for about five minutes at the beginning (unless she shows up later - I'm only about half an hour in). Anyway, she and her boyfriend break up, and it's only when he pushes her for a reason that she decides to reveal that she doesn't ever want children. Apparently, he's brought it up a few times before, and she's directed the conversation away, and she's upset that he never realised that she was doing that.
Bad way to handle it, but at least they acknowledge that childfree women can exist. She's not explained, or has excuses made for her - she just doesn't ever want kids.
Her boyfriend's reaction is "well, I was in it for the long haul - marriage, kids, - and I guess she wasn't." That's a bit more typical, assuming that the long haul has to include kids, but oh well.
I really should get some sleep, it's hafl one in the morning.
So, discuss.:D
There's a childfree character! Unfortunately, she's only in it for about five minutes at the beginning (unless she shows up later - I'm only about half an hour in). Anyway, she and her boyfriend break up, and it's only when he pushes her for a reason that she decides to reveal that she doesn't ever want children. Apparently, he's brought it up a few times before, and she's directed the conversation away, and she's upset that he never realised that she was doing that.
Bad way to handle it, but at least they acknowledge that childfree women can exist. She's not explained, or has excuses made for her - she just doesn't ever want kids.
Her boyfriend's reaction is "well, I was in it for the long haul - marriage, kids, - and I guess she wasn't." That's a bit more typical, assuming that the long haul has to include kids, but oh well.
I really should get some sleep, it's hafl one in the morning.
So, discuss.:D
So last night I had a 9:50 showing of "Harry Potter" repeatedly interrupted by a couple I can only refer to as BNPs and their toddler. The only that kept me from pitching a fit at these people was knowing that I could tell the story here.
The theater was absolutely packed, and husband and I weren't able to find seats together. I ended up sitting next to this particular family, Mom next to me, then the child, and then the dad, who was on the aisle. First I was annoyed because my husband and I were separated and this was a tiny little girl, two or three years old, who could just as easily sit on a lap as have her own seat in a crowded theater.
I then proceeded to become more annoyed, because when Mom wasn't taking the kid in and out of theater (and climbing over Dad to do so, because he seemed to be exempt from that job), she and Dad were explaining the movie to her. In Portuguese. I mention that not to cast aspersions on people who speak Portuguese--inconsiderate is the same in any language--but because that was a bit of a WTF moment for me, and yet another distraction that took my attention away from the screen. The kid herself might have asked two or three questions, but no more than that (of course that might have been because she couldn't get a word in). Not a quiet moment or a tension-filled scene transpired without parental commentary.
And then, sure enough, maybe 45 minutes from the end of the film, Mom pulled up the armrest between our seats and hauled the kid up into her lap, yes, overlapping into my space. And about 15 minutes later, they got up and left, leaving Dad behind. I couldn't know if they were going to return or not (they didn't), so I sat with two empty seats next to me and my husband in the row ahead of me for the last half hour of the movie. At least Dad didn't have anyone to talk to then. :-/
I can't help thinking this poor kid isn't going to be learning much in the way of manners. My mom would have had me in her lap in a second if she'd seen a couple having to sit in separate rows. That is, if she'd had me at a 9:50pm, not young-kid-oriented movie when I was two years old to begin with.
The theater was absolutely packed, and husband and I weren't able to find seats together. I ended up sitting next to this particular family, Mom next to me, then the child, and then the dad, who was on the aisle. First I was annoyed because my husband and I were separated and this was a tiny little girl, two or three years old, who could just as easily sit on a lap as have her own seat in a crowded theater.
I then proceeded to become more annoyed, because when Mom wasn't taking the kid in and out of theater (and climbing over Dad to do so, because he seemed to be exempt from that job), she and Dad were explaining the movie to her. In Portuguese. I mention that not to cast aspersions on people who speak Portuguese--inconsiderate is the same in any language--but because that was a bit of a WTF moment for me, and yet another distraction that took my attention away from the screen. The kid herself might have asked two or three questions, but no more than that (of course that might have been because she couldn't get a word in). Not a quiet moment or a tension-filled scene transpired without parental commentary.
And then, sure enough, maybe 45 minutes from the end of the film, Mom pulled up the armrest between our seats and hauled the kid up into her lap, yes, overlapping into my space. And about 15 minutes later, they got up and left, leaving Dad behind. I couldn't know if they were going to return or not (they didn't), so I sat with two empty seats next to me and my husband in the row ahead of me for the last half hour of the movie. At least Dad didn't have anyone to talk to then. :-/
I can't help thinking this poor kid isn't going to be learning much in the way of manners. My mom would have had me in her lap in a second if she'd seen a couple having to sit in separate rows. That is, if she'd had me at a 9:50pm, not young-kid-oriented movie when I was two years old to begin with.
Hi, new member here (sort of). I've been lurking but I finally have something worth posting.
I went to an 8 pm showing of Bruno tonight with my boyfriend. If you've seen Bruno you know what comes to mind, and if not you may not want me to spoil it for you. I'll just say I've never seen so much dick and ridiculous, raunchy scenes in a theater in my entire life. It clearly deserves its R rating, and is VERY close to crossing the NC-17 line. Funny stuff, but quite shocking.
When the movie ended and everyone started leaving, I saw a man walking out with a very little boy who I didn't get a good look at. But he was probably anywhere from 6 to 9.
I... I... ASSFKDSDLFKNSFSKM. WHAT.
I went to an 8 pm showing of Bruno tonight with my boyfriend. If you've seen Bruno you know what comes to mind, and if not you may not want me to spoil it for you. I'll just say I've never seen so much dick and ridiculous, raunchy scenes in a theater in my entire life. It clearly deserves its R rating, and is VERY close to crossing the NC-17 line. Funny stuff, but quite shocking.
When the movie ended and everyone started leaving, I saw a man walking out with a very little boy who I didn't get a good look at. But he was probably anywhere from 6 to 9.
I... I... ASSFKDSDLFKNSFSKM. WHAT.
To say I'm quite displeased with my home state is an understatement. Thanks to pressure from anti-choice groups, judicial courts just upheld a ruling that mandates enforcement of a parental notification law concerning teenaged girls and abortion. Basically, your 15 year old daughter will now have to tell mom and dad that she is pregnant and risk either getting thrown out of the house or forced to go through with an unwanted pregnancy and therefore continue a guaranteed cycle of poverty (Yes, I realize there are exceptions, but they're just that, exceptions - if every teenaged parent was gifted with supernatural ability to overcome, the success stories touted on the news wouldn't be news anymore).
You can't fix a mistake with another mistake, which is what this law threatens to do. Illinois, for those of you who may not know, is one of several states under a budget ax: we're billions in debt and many social services are being cut because there's no longer funding to support them; Mutual Ground (a domestic abuse shelter for women and children) is but one of those such services forced to close for lack of funding. So by forcing children to have more children that they can't provide for and think that "oh, state services will provide help", is bloody ignorant and stupid - there aren't going to BE any services for those who will need them!
The ONLY reason I don't support parental notification laws re: abortion is because of the girls who WILL get hurt by them. And it goes without saying that the pro-liars who spearhead these kinds of legislative nuttery are more concerned with punishing females for having sex, rather than bothering to do anything about the real causes of abortion. You know, like that pesky poverty wherein women who already have a child/children must abort the extra because they can't afford the rising childcare costs.
There is supposedly a proviso in the legislation that claims a minor can appeal to a judge for permission to go around the law, but because of the likely publicity involved and the lack of available representation to take on such cases, this is at best an undependable loophole, especially should the judge rule that the teen be denied an abortion.
So, when do we start the underground abortion railroad, hmm? Some days it sure looks like there's going to be a need for it soon... :(
You can't fix a mistake with another mistake, which is what this law threatens to do. Illinois, for those of you who may not know, is one of several states under a budget ax: we're billions in debt and many social services are being cut because there's no longer funding to support them; Mutual Ground (a domestic abuse shelter for women and children) is but one of those such services forced to close for lack of funding. So by forcing children to have more children that they can't provide for and think that "oh, state services will provide help", is bloody ignorant and stupid - there aren't going to BE any services for those who will need them!
The ONLY reason I don't support parental notification laws re: abortion is because of the girls who WILL get hurt by them. And it goes without saying that the pro-liars who spearhead these kinds of legislative nuttery are more concerned with punishing females for having sex, rather than bothering to do anything about the real causes of abortion. You know, like that pesky poverty wherein women who already have a child/children must abort the extra because they can't afford the rising childcare costs.
There is supposedly a proviso in the legislation that claims a minor can appeal to a judge for permission to go around the law, but because of the likely publicity involved and the lack of available representation to take on such cases, this is at best an undependable loophole, especially should the judge rule that the teen be denied an abortion.
So, when do we start the underground abortion railroad, hmm? Some days it sure looks like there's going to be a need for it soon... :(
Edit (July 16, 5:35 pm): Often enough, I get flamed for either my life choices, or my story, or not being child-free enough for some people based on my circumstances, or what have you... so, I haven't read a single reply to this thread. While I rant on the subject, and I enjoy sharing my story with others, but I like to avoid the drama by not fueling the fire and trying to debate with others.
If anyone has a real question they want an honest answer to regarding my circumstances, they are free to of course contact me privately. Anyone who doesn't bother to do that, probably isn't all that interested anyway.
Several people have contacted me to date, and thank you.
Not to over-shadow the supportive individuals: I truly appreciate your comments and private messages, thank you <3
That is all :)
Original post:
I'm a bit of a lurker, but I thought I'd make a post to say hello.
I'm 27 years old, happily married, one cat, and no kids, child-free, pro-choice, pro-whatever-the-hell-you-wanna-be... and Canadian :) I'm a very friendly individual, unless you piss me off... in which case, I'm a very unfriendly individual. I don't deny having a pretty extreme other half of the equation either. But I'm a fiercely-loyal individual to people who call me a friend.
( If you actually care to read into something more complicated about my life... click here )
Anyway, that's a bit about my circumstances. I enjoy reading people's posts here, and I'll continue to do so.
Cheers!
If anyone has a real question they want an honest answer to regarding my circumstances, they are free to of course contact me privately. Anyone who doesn't bother to do that, probably isn't all that interested anyway.
Several people have contacted me to date, and thank you.
Not to over-shadow the supportive individuals: I truly appreciate your comments and private messages, thank you <3
That is all :)
Original post:
I'm a bit of a lurker, but I thought I'd make a post to say hello.
I'm 27 years old, happily married, one cat, and no kids, child-free, pro-choice, pro-whatever-the-hell-you-wanna-be... and Canadian :) I'm a very friendly individual, unless you piss me off... in which case, I'm a very unfriendly individual. I don't deny having a pretty extreme other half of the equation either. But I'm a fiercely-loyal individual to people who call me a friend.
( If you actually care to read into something more complicated about my life... click here )
Anyway, that's a bit about my circumstances. I enjoy reading people's posts here, and I'll continue to do so.
Cheers!
I was just re-playing Silent Hill 3, and there's this disturbing scene in it (Warning! TMI for some):
[spoilers]
Some backstory of the game: the main character, Heather, is sought by a cult priestess, Claudia, who wants Heather to give birth to the cult's god. (Heather is an incarnation of another character, Alessa, who used to be a vessel for the god)
At one point in the game, Heather pukes up the god fetus by swallowing a chemical sample - basically she's doing an abortion. She then maliciously tries to stomp on the blob of cells.
But before she can do that, a horrified Claudia stops Heather. Claudia then proceeds to eat the fetus, because she wants god to survive. She gives birth to it, while dying in the process. Naturally, the god turns out to be a butt-ugly monster and Heather proceeds to kick its ass.
[end of spoilers]
I think Claudia might be the ultimate pro-lifer. Thoughts?
- Mood:
relaxed
I just saw a book review for Bad Mother, written by a woman who became a social pariah because she said she loved her husband more than her children.
My question is this: are there any good books or essays about this specific issue in American society? Not expressly childfree necessarily, but about the issue that women are "required" to sacrifice their lives for children in order to have worth as people or be "real women". I mean, I'm sure there's books out there, but do you have any good recommendations?
My question is this: are there any good books or essays about this specific issue in American society? Not expressly childfree necessarily, but about the issue that women are "required" to sacrifice their lives for children in order to have worth as people or be "real women". I mean, I'm sure there's books out there, but do you have any good recommendations?
World's oldest new mom dies, leaves 2 toddlers
You have to wonder whether the cocktail of hormones that this woman had to take to force fertility after natural menopause contributed to her tumor. There has got to be some kind of reality check for fertility clinics. I feel very bad for the children.
Bousada told an interviewer she lied to the fertility clinic about her age, and maintained that because her mother had lived to be 101, she had a good chance of living long enough to raise a child.
You have to wonder whether the cocktail of hormones that this woman had to take to force fertility after natural menopause contributed to her tumor. There has got to be some kind of reality check for fertility clinics. I feel very bad for the children.
Today I had a customer (I work at a bookstore and during this hour I was at the registers) and she went through the line once. Fine. Then I had another customer. Also fine. Then there was another customer waiting in line and the first customer I mentioned decides to cut them off and say, “Oh, can I go in front of you. My son’s crying and he won’t stop until I buy him this [set of plastic ponies].” (Also, I’m pretty sure that if I hadn’t looked down to the end of the line to acknowledge the next customer she probably wouldn’t have even asked their permission to go before them) The customer she jumped ahead of was young, kind of confused but let her go. I was just really perturbed because A) Who the heck do you think you are that you can just jump the line because you are a mother and also happened to recently make a purchase? and B) What kind of lesson are you teaching your kid? That whenever they cry they get rewarded while simultaneously pissing off the cashier and others around them?
Ah, retail.
Ah, retail.
Dear Neighborhood Parents:
It is 11:05pm. Do you know where your not-quite-teenage children are? Because I do. It's outside. They're all outside, walking up and down the street shouting and laughing to each other. I am in my bedroom trying to sleep, because although school is out, we big people have to go to work in the morning. I do not get a summer vacation anymore and I would rather not spend my bedtime listening to your pre-teens talk and fight outside. So please. REIN IN YOUR CHILDREN.
No love,
Spike
Seriously. I live in a suburban plan of McMansions with many yuppie families and their children. Most of the people are nice, but there are 50 kids in this neighborhood that are younger than 12. And there are only about 20 some houses in this plan. It's crazy. They ruin our evenings on our beautiful back porch with their screaming. BOY do little girls scream a lot. When I was little my dad told me never to scream unless something was wrong, and now I know why! And the older ones are the ones who go up and down the street. They walk through everyone's yard, too. I can sort of understand their attitude, because so many kids play in the other kids' yards, but if it's not your friend's yard, DON'T WALK THROUGH IT. I never walked through my neighbor's yards when I was a kid. Sheesh. And I definitely wasn't allowed out gallivanting around the neighborhood until 11pm, summer or no. I don't think I got to stay out to eleven until I was 17! I probably still had to be in when the lamp posts went on when I was these kids' age.
It is 11:05pm. Do you know where your not-quite-teenage children are? Because I do. It's outside. They're all outside, walking up and down the street shouting and laughing to each other. I am in my bedroom trying to sleep, because although school is out, we big people have to go to work in the morning. I do not get a summer vacation anymore and I would rather not spend my bedtime listening to your pre-teens talk and fight outside. So please. REIN IN YOUR CHILDREN.
No love,
Spike
Seriously. I live in a suburban plan of McMansions with many yuppie families and their children. Most of the people are nice, but there are 50 kids in this neighborhood that are younger than 12. And there are only about 20 some houses in this plan. It's crazy. They ruin our evenings on our beautiful back porch with their screaming. BOY do little girls scream a lot. When I was little my dad told me never to scream unless something was wrong, and now I know why! And the older ones are the ones who go up and down the street. They walk through everyone's yard, too. I can sort of understand their attitude, because so many kids play in the other kids' yards, but if it's not your friend's yard, DON'T WALK THROUGH IT. I never walked through my neighbor's yards when I was a kid. Sheesh. And I definitely wasn't allowed out gallivanting around the neighborhood until 11pm, summer or no. I don't think I got to stay out to eleven until I was 17! I probably still had to be in when the lamp posts went on when I was these kids' age.
Link to one version of article
( Text of first article for linkophobics )
Link to second version of article
( Text of second article )
To sum up - 18 year old kid gets pissed at mom - happens upon nudie pics of mom and posts them online to sell. Mom's reaction is a bit, uh, interesting.
Anyhoo - yet another reason to rejoice in not having kids - don't have to worry about them posting nudie pics of you on the damn internet. (Bad enough for some people that they have to worry about current or past lovers posting said pics. Rather skeevy for one's KID to do so.)
( Text of first article for linkophobics )
Link to second version of article
( Text of second article )
To sum up - 18 year old kid gets pissed at mom - happens upon nudie pics of mom and posts them online to sell. Mom's reaction is a bit, uh, interesting.
Anyhoo - yet another reason to rejoice in not having kids - don't have to worry about them posting nudie pics of you on the damn internet. (Bad enough for some people that they have to worry about current or past lovers posting said pics. Rather skeevy for one's KID to do so.)
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