hello, I'm new. My name is Natalie. I'm 20. I feel feel open and raw right now, see little less then a month ago my boyfriend of almost 4 months informs me that
a.) "we need to take a break."
b.) I have personality traits he can't live with
c.) that we might as well break up now, to save a fight and never speaking to each other again.
d.) i'm aggravating
e.) but he still cares about me and wants to be friends
and acts like an ass every time I try to ask him what changed.

We met over LJ, turns out he was in Mi for college, we started emailing each other then phone calls... then we met. He always liked to say we fit.
And in early August he asked me to think about coming to live with him after we were together for 6 months. He even said he was thinking about staying in
Mi(his graduation is in Dec., he hopes to get a job in CA or FL.)until I wanted to leave. And I fell in love. we spent most of the summer together, and constantly being told I'm almost perfect and beautiful, being told that he was so happy to have finally found someone that he plans to spend a "very long time with") apparently 4 months is a long time to a male).
When he told me he wanted to break up(over the phone) and that he had been thinking about it for 2 weeks(10 of those 14 days we were together, and he conveniently wanted to have sex right before I left to go home).It put me into a serious state of shock, I right after he broke it off started my period a week early, I've lost almost 20 pound(I only weighted about 113, now I'm almost 90), I can't sleep or eat right. And because he still wants to be friends he calls whenever he wants to talk to someone or is stressed out(once a midnight, once a 8 in the morning, and I love this guy so I want to help him with his stress, but its tearing me up). I can't bring myself to talk to him about how much he hurt me, becuase the last time I tried he became really mad. I don't want to lose him completely, but I can't live like this. I don't know if I should take the chance of him never speaking to me again to tell him he hurt me and that I want to know the real reason he broke it off.
I'm in a different state right now visiting my aunt, I didn't bring along my cell(roaming sucks), but before I left, he called twice asking to talk before I left. I called him, and he just kept asking me what I wanted to talk about(i emailed him and told him i was uncomfortable talking to him. and that there is alot of stuff I now feel I can't share with him, to which replied"u can tell me anything") I feel really hurt that he thinks we can just be friends so easily. I hated that he was so annoyed that I was hurt that he wanted to break up. I don't want to just stop talking to him, because I do like him. He's a great guy, but him not caring what he's doingt to my emotional state is driving me insane, or perhaps he doesn't know he's doing it. I haven't mentioned "us" since we got into a fight a few days after we broke up, I figured I'd just live with it, and I'll get over him and we can just be friends. I figured that if I just acted normal, and not hung up and so pathetic as I feel, that he would see me a myself and want me back. When I asked if he would flat out tell me that he had no feelings for me and that he would never again
ask me out, he wouldn't do it, I pin it off on ego, that he gives me just enough hope to hang on, so that he knows he's stringing a chic along. I don't want to lose him, but I can't live like this, crying every time a love song plays(the Savage Garden song,Chained to you, is exactly how it was the first time he kissed me, that use to be one of my fav. songs , or when I see something that reminds me of him(pools,ice cream,anime,my icon...). I don't know what to do. I wish I would of never met him.