we don't want to, we don't have to

Posted by:	goth_kittykat.
Time:	11:38 pm.

i don't really know how to title this. just felt the need to post about this here with understanding gals.

so this is the first summer i've been with my bf(we're ld) in person since i've stopped wearing bras sans work. for the most part he just asked if i was going to put on a bra, i said no i don't really wear them unless i have to like at work anymore. he's been cool except he asks me to wear them whenever we're meeting people or going to an event in public. he told me this weekend why. he said he was a bit uncomfortable if it's not just chores or around the neighborhood because the shirts i wear aren't loose, and because of that combined with my 'headlight' 24/7 nipples he felt like they are out there for everyone to see even though he admits i am covered. he said he feels like other people might stare and fantasize about me because of this, but because we're together he feels like their in a sense his only. he said if people were accepting and understanding like if we were at a nudist colony he wouldn't care but he knows most people aren't like that and that's where his concern comes from.

i can understand! but it's kinda programing ya know?

so i told him that. and that if you look at guys or yourself, most of their nipples are 'headlight'/errect most of the time too. if you actually look at their shirts they stick out too, but because our society says that girls breasts stick out more than men it's wrong..but it's the same. he agreed. then i said even with a bra, guys and girls will fantasize about them. sometimes more, and because i'm a bigger girl, that's been the first thing that kids would look at and make fun of me etc. in middle school when i first got them and i had a bra on. so it's not going to stop them, but that doesn't make them any less yours.

he understood and got it then.

but my thing is where is this programing coming from!?!?! it's insane. my boyfriend is pretty open about stuff, he doesn't care about me not shaving for instance. but it even gets to open minded people at times.

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Subject:	Open Letter
Posted by:	lunaesia.
Time:	9:38 pm.

To the high school boys riding bicycles on the all-purpose path through the Metroparks who were offended by my bralessness this evening:

My sympathies go out to you. It must be very difficult being a pubescent boy who has so little firsthand experience with breasts as to not realize that women do, in fact, have nipples under their shirts. Or that breasts, being attached to bodies, move around when said bodies move. In order to avoid wrecking your social status altogether, I recommend you keep your sad state of miseducation to yourself, and not spouting it at passersby in public.

Sincerely,

K.M.

(x-posted to my personal journal)

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Subject:	help?
Posted by:	goth_kittykat.
Time:	6:22 pm.
Music:	Pharrell - Best Friend \| Powered by Last.fm.

xposted from fuck_shaving

i'm a big girl and always have been. i'm currently a d, sometimes dd. but unlike all those myths it doesn't hurt to run braless, be braless, or anything, it's freeing and it makes me feel good. so for me just because i'm big doesn't mean it hurts.

my mom keeps telling me that i shouldn't walk around without a bra because my breasts will be sagging to my stomach when i get older if i don't wear one. i don't care about it really. i believe we are made this way for a reason and i honor it(hence the no shaving). but does anyone have any articles/scientific or even some oprah(she loves oprah) like stuff that says that wearing a bra does not mean that it keeps your breasts lifted as a result? i think because i am big that's why she says it, that is her only complaint about me not wearing one that i hear all the time. so i figure if i can find something she can read from someone or something with some title that maybe it would get her to at least start thinking otherwise.

thanks!

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Subject:	Bra-free and still fashionable - any fashion designers out there?
Posted by:	rockkaraoke.
Time:	1:38 pm.

Hello,
I am bra-free when I am around people that I know well who I know won't take it the wrong way. But in other situations I am not comfortable with the inadvertent effect of drawing attention to my chest. Also, I don't want to have to wear lots of bulky layers just to keep people from noticing my chest, either - I want to still be able to be somewhat fashionable.

On one bra-free site they listed some alternatives to the bra, and one entry was shirts that have two layers in the front and one layer in the back, but there was no link to click on. Where can I find these shirts?

Also, are there any stores who sell shirts that have thick material around the breast area done in an artistic manner - but the whole shirt isn't made out of the thick material? For instance, I know a lot of people will wear vests or thicker, stiffer fabrics but I still don't like the feeling of constriction that vests bring. If I had any artistic talent, I would take pieces of thick fabric and sew them onto a fitted shirt in strategic places, in a way that made it look like art - but I have no skills in that department.

Another idea I'd like to see would be for them to take a loosely fitted shirt and sew loose flowing fabric on the front of the shirt in certain strategic areas – so it would have a similar effect to wearing something that had pockets in the chest area, but that would look prettier than pockets.

Are there any designers/manufacturers that market directly to the bra-free crowd? Are there tops I can wear that will still let me have a sense of style? I'm so tired of wearing ugly clothes to stop people from staring at my breasts.
Thanks!

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Subject:	Slightly off-topic rant
Posted by:	fireaphid.
Time:	1:03 am.

I was listening to music on Pandora Internet radio, and one of the ads led me to this. (If you don't want to click it, and I wouldn't blame you, a bra company asked some female musicians to perform as a band wearing nothing but the brand's bras, and presumably whatever bottoms they wanted.) They claim on the site that they chose the musicians not for their musical talent, but for their confidence to perform without shirts, reinforcing the sexist stereotype that women can't actually play good music, but that they exist only to visually please others (okay, men). The company behind the ad also promotes wearing bras all the time "24/7," which is known to reduce circulation and increase the probability of developing a medical issue of the breast, nor do they appear to market even one design that is neither padded nor wired, as if to make immensely clear that their product exists to make women look the way they are expected to look (with large breasts hiked up to their ears), without necessarily being comfortable or functional. Grrr, this just made me mad!

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Subject:	Bras in the workplace
Posted by:	dicehiggins.
Time:	6:53 pm.
Mood:	aggravated.

So, I have been bra free for a while. I love it. No more shoulder pain. (after $100's spent on chriropratic care) I wear cami's to keep me from swinging and sagging too much, and/or showing too much. I just saw another report that says "Women who wore their bras 24 hours per day had a 3 out of 4 chance of developing breast cancer " I love the bra free lifestyle. Well, today at work I wore a lighter shirt because the weather is warming up. . . and my manager pulls me over to tell me she's had a complaint that I wasn't wearing any underclothing. I told her I had on a cami, which she said is within dress code, but she advised I get a bra so that there were no complaints or problems. I have a 42" bust, so I am a bit big, and it is hard to find bras that 'fit' much less comfortable ones. I went to a fancy bra shop and spent $50 about 6 months ago to get a single bra that was professionally fitted. I wore it for 3 hours before my shoulder pain returned. I need suggestions as to ideas. I've considered a corset, I have one, but it isn't very comfortable either if I'm sitting down for extended periods.

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Subject:	Question and ramblings...
Posted by:	melody672.
Time:	9:46 pm.
Mood:	sleepy.

I'm curious, how often do you go bra-less? All day, every day, occasionally, only at home?

My thoughts have been strongly on wearing bras recently, with the weather heating up i know i will no longer be able to hide my breasts beneath layers of clothing, so i know it's going to come down to having to wear a bra from now on till winter again. I dread it intensely. I've been enjoying going bra-less most of the time, i always go without one at home, it's the first thing i do when i walk in the door is take it off. Bras are just horrid things and i hate having to go through pain wearing one, and why? Because society says i must, because my breasts as they are naturally are "unsightly and ugly". Ugh i just need to rant that off a bit, i'm just dreading summer and bras so much :/

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Subject:	Sometimes ...
Posted by:	lunaesia.
Time:	1:55 pm.

Sometimes love means wearing a bra to your mother's wedding. It was my first time in ... years? I remember joining this community in 2005 when I first started going bra-free. Wearing a bra to the wedding was uncomfortable, sure. So was wearing heels, also for the first time in ages. But it wasn't my wedding, and as sacrifices go, it was a small one.

I still didn't shave, though. I wore a long-sleeved dress and opaque tights. ;)

In other news, I started a new job two weeks ago. After I was first hired, I was reading over the employee handbook and came across "bras must be worn with summer tops." Now, this was in the context of a focus on modest dress (I work in a church-affiliated preschool), which I appreciate. Longer skirts, looser pants, and keeping your boobs inside your shirt are very reasonable demands. I haven't brought up the issue, because I don't think my bralessness is the kind they are worried about, with breasts unreasonably exposed under a light blouse. I wear t-shirts and jeans to work. If it's a thinner shirt, I wear one of my trusty Old Navy tank tops underneath. If it's a thicker shirt, I don't wear anything underneath. Nobody's noticed yet. I figure I won't bring it up at all. If somebody does eventually comment, I'll have already proven myself as a good employee and all-around modest dresser.

Does this policy generally work for people with dress codes? Or should I bring it up preemptively with my (female and very friendly) employer? Points for being honest and upfront versus keeping personal business personal?

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Subject:	brafree with nipple piercings
Posted by:	kschap.
Time:	3:44 am.

Hello! I'm pretty new to this community. I'm Kelley, 24, from Maine, and I've been shunning the bra for a bit over a month now! I use camisoles when going out in public to keep my breasts from swaying side to side too much (I'm a 36D so complete bralessness is fairly noticeable most of the time), but I have an issue.

My nipples are pierced. I'm absolutely in love with the piercings so taking them out isn't an option, but like, I don't necessarily want everyone who looks down from my face at all to be able to tell that something unusual is going on with my tits, you know what I mean? Heh.

Do any of you here have nipple pierings? Are there any relatively inexpensive ways to cover them up a bit?

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Subject:	Hi
Posted by:	cherrysyllabub.
Time:	5:01 pm.

Hi I've just joined the community and I agree that bras suck!!!

I've worn bras for years (I'm 39 and a C cup) but lately they just annoy me. I have problems with heartburn and I always feel like bras are choking me or squeezing my chest.. I've had to go braless in church before because my bra was hurting me. Lately I've been wearing little pull on bras from JCPenny.. I think they are Adonna. they are meant as leisure bras but I wear them all the time-- even to the office.

Does anyone have any recommendations for any good bras?

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Subject:	ha-HA
Posted by:	ladykorinna.
Time:	7:27 pm.
Mood:	cheerful.

Went bra shopping on Wednesday. Only one in my size (a minimizer), but tried a few others on for the hell of it. Tried on about 5-6, and by the time I got done, I said FUCK IT. My boobs hurt, I was in a bad mood, so I just walked out.
No bras. Bras suck. SUCKKKKKKK.

I feel victorious.

I told one of my friends today:
"So what if they sag when I'm older?!"
*friend nods*
"Fuck, if need be, I'll just tuck 'em in my damn belt"
*friend chokes, LOLs*

:D

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Subject:	Boobies and Barbies
Posted by:	jayme_lee_z.
Time:	7:02 pm.
Mood:	geeky.

Hi all! I have been lurking here for a long time, but have yet to post an entry. I always enjoy reading posts and comments! Anyway...

During Thanksgiving this year my family and I pulled out the ole family videos. I watched myself open up a new barbie I had received for my 8th birthday; I was elated to get this treasured doll.

Watching this made me think about my own kids and whether or not i would want them to play with barbies, given barbies unrealistic proportions (ie the boobs). I don't want my future daughter thinking that boobs are supposed to look like that. At the same time though, I played with barbies and as far as i can tell it had no negative effect on me as I am braless a lot.

So I guess my question is for all you mothers and children lovers out there... what do you do? Do you buy your children barbies, bratz, and other weird dolls? If not, what do you get instead and do your children feel left out because they dont have barbies at home and other kids do?

Im probably over analyzing this, but that's what I do folks!

Thanks for being a positive community!

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Subject:	having a bad day.
Posted by:	ladykorinna.
Time:	9:00 pm.
Mood:	depressed.

I'm sick of all the shit I get from people around me. I have really poor self-esteem, and can't really help it. I try to act like people don't bother me, but they DO.
My brother (14) told me I needed to get a bra because my boobs are all gross and saggy and he "doesn't need to see that".
My mother has refused to allow me to go to family events because my "bra-less boobs are indecent".

I'm a 36F. My measurements are 43-31-42, and my boobs do sag enough that they hide my waist. That makes me look and feel FAT. I hate the way they look under clothing, and I hate not being able to pogo at punk concerts (I'm going to another one Dec 19).. I can't ride my horse anymore because they bounce too much, I can't run.. I'm limited because they are so big.
I know it's better to be brafree, and I know it shouldn't matter if they sag, but I just can't convince myself that I'm beautiful brafree.
I'm sick of wearing baggy clothing; I'd never survive school if it was noticeable that I was brafree. Camis don't do a thing to disguise anything.
I don't like wearing bras, and yet I want one right now. I really don't know what to do. If I got one and only wore it every now and then, I'd just end up wearing it more and more.

Oh, what I'd give for tiny boobs.....

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Subject:	from the 'fuck the haters' gallery
Posted by:	alasbabylon.
Time:	3:50 pm.
Mood:	lazy.
Music:	blind melon.

found this while having a.d.d.

some of the comments are stupidful, but whatever, barbara streisand can do whatever the fuck she wants. i think she looks pretty good for someone of her age and size. funny folks get so squicked by human bodies though. perhaps i've taken one too many figure drawing classes?

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Subject:	using radar technology for cancer screenings
Posted by:	real_live_troll.
Time:	3:23 pm.
Mood:	hopeful.

This isn't exactly bra-related, but it is about breast health and I know in the past there have been discussions concerning mammography here. Anyway, I thought this article/study was interesting.

http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2008/11/081111203503.htm

It takes less time to operate than a mammogram approximately six minutes for both breasts compared with 30-45 minutes for an MRI, and like an MRI it provides a very detailed 3D digital image.
...
Women do not feel any sensation and it equates to the same type of radiation exposure as speaking into a mobile phone at arms length which makes it much safer.

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Subject:	Another reason to avoid bras
Posted by:	supersecretss.
Time:	9:23 am.

(A friend of mine posted this, and I thought I'd pass it on here.) This hasn't affected me personally, but I thought I should pass this along: there's a health warning out regarding newer foam-form bras, particularly those made in China for Victoria Secret. Women have been getting horrible rashes from these bras, sometimes requiring a course of prednisone. Some people writing in to MedHelp have complained about other brands as well. Lab tests have turned up toxic chemicals in the fabrics. There's a gma story about it here/a>.

Comments: Read 5 or Add Your Own.

Posted by:	melody672.
Time:	3:58 pm.
Mood:	indifferent.

I'm so sick of feeling shameful of my body, just for being the way it naturally is.
I'm tired of people telling me i should be ashamed of my body, that it's ugly and wrong.
Yes my tits sag! Hell they're almost to my knees now! Theres no "perk", they just lay flat, Yes i am only 20, but have the tits of a 80yr. old woman who nursed 20 kids! So no man will ever want me.
Yes i am hairy! I don't removed not one hair from this body, i let it all grow! But i'm told this is repulsive, unwomanly.
Yes i am fat! I have a tummy, cellulite, jiggly arms, thunder thighs, stretch marks, and much more that i'm told to "get rid of"!
Shit i have crazy frizzy hair, crooked teeth, acne, a plain face, short stature, every part of my body you pick apart to find something wrong, something i should change!
I am a person, a body full of flaws, you can try to teach me that it's wrong, that i'm unattractive, nasty, ugly, repulsive, whatever the fuck you want to call me, but i won't give in, i have spent my life hating my body, and I Sick Of It!!! I'm ready to fight back, bring it on.

I'm sorry i just needed to get that out, i've been dealing with particularly strong shame and anxiety about my breasts lately.
Heres a pic, it's not a very good one, but the only one i have right now. Yes braless, it might be ugly to you, but it's who i am and i'm learning to accept it.

Comments: Read 33 or Add Your Own.

Posted by:	melody672.
Time:	12:09 pm.
Mood:	bouncy.
Music:	AmandaFuckingPalmer.

I have to say, no exclaim, my love of cool weather. Why? because i can 1 wear baggy sweaters and 2 lots of layers, which 3 means i don't have to worry so much about how my tits look!

I do not go braless except around the house, but i've been trying to branch out, since i've been able to wear a baggy sweater the past few days i don't have to feel so conscience about the fact that my breasts sag down to literally my belly button, and something happened that i thought never would - i went out into public WITHOUT a bra on! I went to the post office, wal-mart and two grocery stores without wearing a bra, i admit it was mostly because i wasn't feeling very well and just couldn't bear with having to mess with a painful bra right then. It felt great, i could move around without discomfort and restricting! And no one looked at me and ran away screaming in horror!

I MUST move to place where it's always cold, i live in one of the hottest states, oklahoma, blah.

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