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FanFiction - 'Chasing Butterflies' - Chp 8/12
Title: Chasing Butterflies
Fandom: Gossip Girl
Spoilers: general Season 2
Rating: T
Genre: Drama/Romance
Status: In-progress
Chapter: 8/12
Summary: After 19yrs of marriage, Chuck and Blair are bitter and angry. So for their 20th wedding anniversary their daughter, Mia, sets out to get them the perfect gift: each other.

Disclaimer: I own only Amelia Waldorf-Bass, Katherine Archibald, and Jackson and Daniella Humphrey. All other recognisable characters and places are the property of their respective owners.

Chapter Eight: All I Want for Christmas

For the first time in a long time, Mia genuinely looked forward to Christmas. The Christmas right before her tenth birthday had been the last time her parents had been happy for the holiday. Every year since then, Chuck and Blair had put on brave faces and tried to pretend. They’d put away their hurtful words and try to convince Mia that they were a happy family.

Mia always knew better.

On previous Christmas mornings she’d lie awake with her eyes closed and take herself back to the holidays she remembered from her childhood. Only with them firmly in her mind could she dress and go downstairs with a smile on her face.

This year, as soon as she was conscious enough to form coherent thoughts, Mia pushed her sleeping mask up onto her forehead and her eyes popped open.

In one fluid movement, she sat up and pushed her bedcovers away. She climbed out of bed, and then had to steady herself by grabbing her nightstand when she had a rush of blood to the head.

She told herself to calm down. When she got downstairs (whether it be in 5 minutes or 5 hours) she was sure she’d find her parents happy and healthy; nothing drastic would have changed overnight. Although if something had changed, she really shouldn’t be rushing; better to savour the memories of the last few weeks.

No matter how many times she made herself move slower, Mia ultimately hastened again. In the end, she decided to end her torment and flung the dress she’d been considering for the day down on her bed. She grabbed her robe and put it on over her nightgown (‘nightgown’ was Chuck’s word; it made him too uncomfortable to think of his baby girl in a negligee), and then hurried downstairs.

When she reached the common room and found her parents sitting beside each other on the chaise she breathed a quiet sigh of relief. She was right not to have worried.

Chuck looked up when he noticed her standing in the doorway. Mia figured she was grinning like an idiot, but her father still stood to embrace her.

She wrapped her arms around his torso and squeezed. When she burrowed her face into his chest, she smelt the familiar mix of scotch, cigarettes and his cologne, and her smile widened.

Chuck’s hand smoothed her hair and he kissed the top of her head. “Everything all right, Mia?”

She leaned her head back to look into his eyes. It was there, his love for her, just as it had always been. But there was happiness there too now. That hopelessness that had been present just weeks before was all but gone.

She stood on her toes to kiss his cheek. “Yes, Daddy. I’m just glad you’re here.”

His eyes showed his surprise. “Well, me too, Mia, me too.”

He put an arm around her shoulders and drew her further into the room so that she could kiss her mother.

When Chuck had resumed his seat beside his wife and Mia had taken the sofa opposite them, Blair presented Mia with two gifts wrapped in bright paper.

As Mia took them, Blair smiled and said, “Mine’s the bigger one.”

Chuck chuckled and smirked at her. “Blair, you know that it’s not the size that counts, but the price tag attached.”

She turned to him and matched his smirk with one of her own. “That’s too bad for you then. Mine’s still better.”

Mia giggled quietly. She didn’t need whatever was in the boxes; the best gift that year was the playful banter between her parents. Still, because Chuck and Blair turned to her expectantly, Mia pulled off the wrapping paper and folded it neatly beside her, and then opened the boxes. From Blair, she received a black satin clutch by Leiber; from Chuck, she got a crystal studded leaf hinge cuff. The shallow Upper East Side princess inside her rose up and nodded smugly at the items lying on her lap, before Mia had the chance to quash her.

Mia leaned back into the sofa and watched her father pull out the small box containing Blair’s gift. It was blue and had been tied with a white ribbon. From the way Blair’s eyes, sparkled she knew what was inside.

Still, that knowledge didn’t prevent her gasp of shock and admiration when the cushion-cut engagement ring was revealed.

Mia had to admit that it was one of the most beautiful pieces she’d ever seen. Set in a platinum band, the larger centre diamond was surrounded by smaller ones.

Blair tilted the box and watched as the stones sparkled in the light. A soft smile crept on to her face as she said, “I have my own now.”

When Blair glanced over at her daughter, Mia had the grace to smile sheepishly. Her mother might not have known that Mia was setting her up with Chuck, but she did know where he got the idea for the engagement ring. Mia couldn’t deny it, so she didn’t try.

Blair cleared her throat and retrieved a small box similar to the one Chuck had just presented her with. She turned it over in her hands for a moment and then awkwardly presented it to Chuck.

He eyed the box, and then Blair, before he pulled off the ribbon and opened it.

Mia leaned forward to see a gold signet ring with an engraving on the face. From her distance, she couldn’t make out the markings, but watched as Chuck traced them gently with one finger.

He leaned forward and placed a gentle kiss on Blair’s cheek, and as he did, the box he was holding tipped towards Mia slightly. She could tell the action was accidental, but it didn’t stop her from leaning forward even more and squinting.

There, on the face of Chuck’s new ring were two elaborately curled letters: a ‘C’ and a ‘B’.

Mia sat back and lowered her gaze to stare at her clutch and bracelet. CB? Chuck Bass. It had to be, and frankly, it made sense.

But then she raised her eyes again and took in her parents. She started. CB. Chuck Bass…or Chuck and Blair?

Mia smiled. Her mother could deny that the ‘B’ stood for herself all she wanted, but Mia would always know the truth…and she figured Chuck would too.

xoxo

A few hours later, Mia lay back on her bed and selected Ella on her speed dial. As she listened to the ringing, she sat up against her headboard, hating the feeling of her lunch sitting heavily in her stomach when she was lying down.

Finally, the dial tone ended and Ella’s voice came through the speaker.

“Hey, Mia! Merry Christmas!”

“Merry Christmas. Tell me, did your parents get you a device that will help you locate missing objects?”

“…Noooo.”

“That’s a shame. Next time you lose your phone you might not be lucky enough to find it.”

Mia heard Ella sigh and then grumble, “I didn’t lose it, it just…”

“What? Ran away?”

Ella ignored the comment. “How are your parents?”

Mia grinned. “They’re great. You should have seen them this morning.”

“I’m glad it’s all working out for you, and for them. Chuck and Blair are lucky to have you. If my parents began hating each other and thinking about divorce, I don’t know what Jack and I would do.”

At the sound of his name, Mia felt a painful stab through her gut. She’d tried not to think about him since the day at Tiffany, but she often found him popping up in her mind at the oddest times, like when she was watching TV, reading a magazine or applying her make-up. The other morning she’d almost spilt her orange juice all over the breakfast table when she randomly remembered that he preferred apple.

She shook him from her head again and tuned back into her conversation with Ella, who she could hear rummaging through something on her end of the line. “Your parents would never do what my parents are doing. They hardly ever fight, and when they do, they make up anywhere between twenty-four to forty-eight hours later.”

“There was that one time they didn’t talk for a week.”

Mia rolled her eyes. “Excuse me if I’m not impressed, Ella. Up until a few weeks ago, my parents had been fighting for eight years.”

Ella made a noise of acquiescence and continued her rummaging.

Mia frowned. “What are you doing?”

The other girl sighed. “I can’t find that coat Mom bought me, you know, the red one. It’s gone and I want to wear it to Grandma’s tonight.”

“You probably sent it out for dry-cleaning and forgot to pick it up.”

“I didn’t! I know it was here. Oh! I know what must have happened to it!”

“What?”

“It must have been stolen!”

Mia blinked. “What? By who?”

“The closet girl.”

The matter-of-fact tone to Ella’s voice kept Mia silent for a long time. Finally, she said, “Ella, that’s bad, even for you. There are no girls in your closet…just like there aren’t monsters under your bed. We went over that in third grade, remember?”

Mia heard what had to be Ella’s closet door close with a thump. “Don’t be patronising, Mia. I’m talking about a real girl. Jack’s latest. I had to put her in my closet this morning.”

As soon as she heard the words, Mia flashed back to a conversation she had had with Ella and Katie weeks before. They’d been walking back to school from the Met when Ella revealed to them that she had to regularly hide Jack’s conquests in her closet so that Dan wouldn’t find them.

“Mia? Are you still there?”

Her mouth opened and closed three or four times before a stuttered sound came out. She cleared her throat. “You still hide Jack’s girls in your closet?”

“Oh yeah. There was period a few weeks ago when he never had girls over and he was in his own bed all night, every night. But then he started bringing them back again. I thought his well had finally dried up, but I guess not.”

She took a slow, deep breath and ignored the sudden, empty feeling in her stomach. “Yeah, I guess not. Look, Ella, I really have to go. I think I hear Mother calling.”

“Oh, well, okay then. I’ll talk to you later!”

Mia didn’t even say goodbye before she hung up. For a moment, she sat in silence, cradling her phone in her hands. Then she flipped it open and brought up her photo gallery. She thumbed past photos of her with Blair, Chuck, Ella and Katie until she reached the one she had been looking for.

Her and Jack at the Hampton’s that past summer. Their bronzed cheeks were pressed together and she was clinging to the arm that he’d thrown around the front of her shoulders to hold her to his chest. Both grinned at the camera, so happy, either because of the company, or being out of school, it didn’t matter.

The emptiness in her gut rose up, swallowing her whole, and with a sudden cry of rage, Mia flung the phone as hard as she could at the opposite wall. The red plastic hit the powder blue with a sharp crack and fell to the floor.

Mia leapt off the bed and strode towards her door, ignoring the split phone beside it. She slammed the door behind her and thumped downstairs. The ribbon containing her ponytail loosened and Mia reached back to rip it out, taking long brown strands with it.

She turned towards the kitchen, thinking that maybe a drink of water would calm her, but before she could get anywhere, voices reached her from down the hall.

She debated for a moment and then decided to investigate.

At the end of the hallway, the door to Chuck’s home office stood cracked open. She rolled her eyes. Didn’t anyone in this house know how to close doors properly? But then she was thankful. An open door had given her a head’s up on her mother’s frame of mind. If that door had been closed, Mia would never have overheard Blair’s conversation with Serena and wouldn’t have been able to help. Still, if you wanted privacy, the Waldorf-Bass apartment probably wasn’t the place to go looking for it.

She took up her position in front of the door, and then checked over her shoulder to make sure their maid wasn’t watching her. When she was sure the coast was clear, Mia turned to the gap and peeked through.

Chuck and Blair stood at opposite ends of his large, mahogany desk. He had his hands braced on the corners as he watched her turn a small box over and over in her hands. It wasn’t until Blair absentmindedly snapped the box open and then closed that Mia saw the flash and realised it was ring Chuck had given Blair just that morning. Her gaze flicked to her father’s right hand, the only one she could see properly, and smiled when she saw the signet ring around one of his fingers.

“Blair,” he said, “please.”

Blair shook her head. “I don’t know. We’ve come so far, done so many horrible things to each other. What makes you think we could start again and do it any differently?”

“I’m not saying we start again. Starting again means erasing everything we’ve learnt. Let’s just try harder. Please, Blair, don’t leave me.”

She was quiet and hung her head so that her fringe covered her face. Chuck sighed and came around to Blair’s end of the desk. He took his face in his hands and raised it to his. With his thumb, he brushed away the tear that was creeping its way down her cheek.

Blair took a slow, shuddering breath. “If we try, we can’t treat each other the way we have been. That means no other women for you.”

He nodded. “And no false accusations or blame laying for you.”

She nodded. “All right, so we’re agreed.”

“Good,” said Chuck and reached down to pull the box out of her hands.

He lifted the lid open and removed the diamond ring. Then he took her left hand and eased the ring up her ring finger until it met her wedding band. They both studied the diamond until Chuck raised Blair’s hand to his mouth. Gently, he placed a kiss on the ring, as if to seal their agreement.

Blair’s other hand smoothed over Chuck’s cheek and then she smiled, a full bright smile that no one had seen in years. She threw her arms around Chuck’s neck and pulled his lips down to meet hers.

As Mia shut the door on them quietly and headed back towards the kitchen, a part of her was rejoicing. That was it. Her parents had agreed. They would stop fighting, be happy and die in each other’s arms, but not for another fifty years, at least.

But the hollow feeling in her gut still remained. Her parents had reunited, but she had still lost Jack.
 

xoxo

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