Lovin_Megan_Fox ([info]written4love) wrote in [info]bisexual_world,
@ 2009-07-04 16:32:00
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Current mood: anxious

Help!
Ugh, was anybody ever in a situation where they were in love with 2 different people?

 I am, and it's slowly turning me insane.
I've had a long-term crush on my supposedly straight bestfriend who flirts with me everyday.

And now i have fallen for a girl who befriended me in town and have had a few close calls with kissing her, and who seeks me out whenever i'm in town or around that genereal area.

My problem is that i don't know who to choose, i've tried making lists, talking to different friends, and looking at it from every angle possible and i'm still coming up blank. Help please.


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[info]vastatuuli
2009-07-04 04:01 pm UTC (link)
Have you asked them if they're interested? You see the signs, you're attracted to them - but you still need to know how interested they are in reality. Especially with the supposedly straight best friend. Do you think talking to them would be an option?

Also, as for being in love with two different people, I recommend that you familiarise yourself with the term polyamory. http://www.xeromag.com/fvpoly.html is a good place to start. I have no idea if these people would be interested in a relationship like that at all, or you for that matter - but it is possible to be in a relationship with two different people! :)

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[info]loosing_gravity
2009-07-04 04:03 pm UTC (link)
Well the fact that your best friend is supposedly straight might present a problem. :/
You should have a girl talk with her and ask her casually, if she's ever thought about being with a woman...Maybe have a couple drinks, watch a movie like, "But I'm a Cheerleader" (which if you haven't seen yet..I'd highly recommend; as it's absolutely brilliant and hilarious..and probably one of the best lgbt related movies out there.) Anywho, if her answer is, "No, I've never had any thoughts"..Chances are, that'll make your choice for you.

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[info]odyssey_bold
2009-07-04 11:03 pm UTC (link)
To OP, definitely check out this advice ^ You might have an easy out if straight friend turns out to not have interest in physical time with a girl.

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[info]runewlf
2009-07-04 04:25 pm UTC (link)
I am in love with three different people, and my wife is in love with two. After conversation, we decided to try polyamory, and now live the lifestyle. It has made the multiple loves issue a non-problem.
Definitely you must speak with them, do so cautiously though.. approach it obliquely to try and discern their thoughts and feelings on the matter. Just my $.02 worth.

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Talk It Over
[info]inuguardian1984
2009-07-05 08:05 pm UTC (link)
You should definitely talk to your "straight" friend before making any moves. Most girls I've been around, be they straight, bi or lesbian, flirt no matter who they're with. They even flirt without realizing they're doing it. It's something ingrained in our personalities. She may not realize that the's flirting with you and not meaning to send out those signals. If she knows your own lifestyle and sexual preferences, talk to her and explain the signals you're getting. Ask her if this is what she's feeling. If she doesn't know, ask what her thoughts on it are. If she's receptive and open-minded enough and is interested in you, go for it. If she's not, then you know you've got the other girl who really seems to be interested in you. Good luck, though. It's difficult when your heart is being pulled in different directions.

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[info]written4love
2009-07-05 10:25 pm UTC (link)
Just wanna say thanks a lot for the comments i think they're all going to help me (:

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