Just OUT! (ahem)
Tinky Winky Hooks Up with Mascot Miga:
BTGWTV ExclusiveIn what is being dubbed as an "extreme violation of copyright and all else that is respectable" by both Canadian and British shareholder interests- it seems that the Olympic 2010 Games are already becoming mired in what is being hailed as the "
Tubby Mascot Scandal."
Beyond the Ghetto, Within the Village just acquired candida, er candid, pictures on Stephen Emery's Facebook page (where the hell else), that Tinky Winky from the hit British BBC Series Teletubbies (recently picked up by PBS in the USA) and Miga, the bearish, Orca mascot from the upcoming 2010 winter Olympics have become FAST buddies.
Tinky Winky Teletubby cozying up to Miga mascot at a local gay pub.
It seems the two met on rather salacious terms in the local Vancouver pub called the Pump Jack - rumoured to soon become a central meeting place for several prominent Olympiads of a certain allegiance, or rather, dalliance, in a few short winter weeks. It's also a well known watering spot for several furry gay bearish folk.
The two maintain that they were just "hitting the town" of Vancouver on a promotional tour, Miga proclaiming that they are "liberal kinda guys" (or we THINK that is their gender identification - hard to tell with no genitalia) who like to be "inclusive of ALL communities and watering holes" with Tinky basically only saying,
"Oh, oh!"
However, the scandal, er, widens, or deepens if you will, when pictures were uploaded to Facebook of an alleged back room encounter between the two media stars, both of whom have a large following of impressionable children.
Indeed, Tinky has fallen under considerable controversy since his present situation seems highly contradictory to his creators' public denial of Tinky's alleged gay sexuality first foist upon him by the most Reverend Jerry Falwell in 1999. [And Jerry should know].
As quoted in the BBC, Steve Rice, a spokesman for Itsy Bitsy Entertainment, which licenses the Teletubbies in the US, stated in that year : "The fact that he carries a magic bag doesn't make him gay. It's a children's show, folks. To think we would be putting sexual innuendo in a children's show is kind of outlandish."
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/276677.stm
However these currently released photos would seem to make Tinky Winky not only ten years older than the newly formed and selling fast Migo, also the chubbier of the two but also a flaming hypocrite.
Miga for his part issued this statement while sticking out his head-mounted dorsal fin defiantly:
"I personally don't care if anyone thinks we're gay or whatever the term for same sex genderless stuffed pseudo human/animals is these days. I am proud to love whomever I want, regardless of creation date and species. As long as he has environmentally safe stuffing and hasn't let every dog in the house chew on him, I'll kiss any other fuzzball around - even Satchi (his co-mascot)... if I get a few drinks in me. I'm young, I'm popular all over BC and fast approaching TInky Winki's level of mindless indoctrination - I mean fame - with the children. As Michael Jackson once said 'it's all about fucking children, I mean THE fucking children right?' "
Miga then ranted to us further:
"Hey wait... is this because I'm mostly black on white - or because I have blush cheeks - well fuck yuze all, I'm a snowboarder dude!"
It has been noted, though, that blush cheeks are a recognized symbol in the manga -Japanese comic book- world for sexual arousal, to which Miga replied:
"I get cuddled a lot these days, by everyone, so it gets me a bit horny! Get over it mothaf$%kers."
Moreover, the Official Olympic mascots for BC have been criticized in the past for having oriental attributes even though they are supposed to represent Native North American traditions. [what that has to do with THIS story, we at BTGWTV have NO flippin' idea.. but it IS a scandal rag piece so we thought we would throw it in with the rest of this trash]
We contacted sexuality and fashion expert Bruno for his opinion about the emerging Canadian scandal.
"You know, I don't know za big deewl here. Vee have a young bear-whale zing vith da olda, fatty, tranzie TV zing...but not matter...NO penis for BOdTH. No Vagunkta, even no special orafista spelunchta to wax-stra! [zike I do every week!] Just lots of de hair and fuzz ball, but NO balls really, nutting. I vuld just trim dem both for de hairy back, maybe sum sqweeze. Rub ma butto vid dem, so soft. But anyvay, it is not gay sexs with NO penises, come on! Vhere is der HOLEs! No A-HOLEs! Not SEXY gay play! Just grow da fuck up conservatif dicks! Und, I VULD let Gayby play wid dem every day... all day...no vorries"
- Bruno reached in Paris...Ontario.
Baby Stewy put in his two cents on a recent TV show:
"Oh please I really don't know what the big deal is. I've got a soother that give me more pleasure. Besides... I've done them ALL, Kermit, Miss Piggy (in public even), Hello Kitty, every sleazy, cuddly crib crawler and fuzz pocket you can imagine. I'm just a PooROwww with the puppets and toooyyzzz....
...."And when it comes to scandal, I have been there, I've REALLY been in the shit..especially when I drink..."
"....These furballs are amateurs. No hole? No matter? Just take some scissors and carve it in...ya know? Carve it in. Sorta poke your finger in after...and it's all good foam from there...you get the idea? It's NOT rocket science dimwits!"
Getting in the last word Miga proclaimed to us:
"I'm a freakin' whale man, well part whale, these VANOC dicks made me this "sea bear" man - which is kinda like a bear mixed with a whale I guess they want us to think. But yeah dude, bear and whale in this one hot bod? Everyone KNOWS, THAT means a LOT of freakin' sperm. It's not my fault they made me this way eh, I gotta deal with that, ya know?"
To which Tinky Winky reportedly replied, "Oh dear" with a bounce and a smile.
Meanwhile the Mascots continue to enjoy fame, and hot sales, from children and adults alike. We SAY it is just innocent fun, only for the kids, but in reality...
_____________________________
Story DE-filed by Stephen Emery
For Beyond the Ghetto - WIthin the Village
HAPPY NEW YEAR !!! 2010
FROM BTGWTV
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strumquill on 2010.01.23 at 19:55
