Yeah, so I signed onto LJ, and I noticed that some people has cut me, and it sort of surprising but I guess shit happens. I know I haven’t been on here in a long time replying to your entree’s, and whatnot but in all honestly I have been so busy trying to shape up my life from everything that is been going on.

Yes, I may be personal on some topics but I just need to vent and maybe get opinions, spare me. I am going to try and start visiting daily at least and read and reply, not just read.

It’ll be another 5 months or so before this divorce will be 100% done with if I’m lucky, I just can’t wait to be over with, everyday I think of how I had one person to be with everyday I was home and now I’m alone but then I also got to remember I deserve someone better, he did some hardcore things that I dislike a lot. Some days I’m strong and happy, other days I’m miserable because I hate being alone.

I will say this dating sucks, it’s horrible! I’m not sure if it’s because where I’m living or what but it’s chaos. Dane and I are over with, I got tired of his bullshit and I still try to show I have interest and it’s the same so therefore he’s gone.

Jared is one asshole that I hope to never see ever again especially after what he done, yes we had sex and I told him to pull out because I just started birth control so I wasn’t sure if it was in effect yet although the doctor said it is in a week but I just want to be safe, so therefore yeah things happened so I text him next morning freaking out, he tells me to get the morning pill and he’ll pay me back and I figured that’s fine, we have been seeing each other once a week if possible and so I go get it and I spend 45.00 that I don’t have and yet has he ever wanted to hang out or anything, no he doesn’t even reply to my text messages.

Yes I have sex, get over it.

I also met a guy on Tuesday, his name is Kirk he seems a pretty nice guy sadly I have no idea when we’ll be able to hang out again he seems to work a lot which is good but it sucks too, ha. I have a date on Friday, ready? Get this… with a NICK CARTER, {no not with the Backstreet Boy, I so fucking wish ha} but so we’ll shall see. I also know there’s a few other guys that want to go on a date as well. I’m just not sure if I’m ready to settle down but I want to or if I should date and see what’s up, I know for sure I want to do like a few dates before I make a decision.

{sorry to be rambling about dating, I’m just 100% confused, seriously I never dated before, I always had a relationship within 24 hours to 3 days tops} LOL!

I’m so happy, Saw 5 is in theater’s Oct 24^th, I’m so there! LOL even if I don’t have money, I’ll sneak in HAHA, really I’m kidding.

Okay, I’m going to be honest here, the boys {Backstreet Boys} are going on tour again for a 2^nd leg and therefore I’m not able to see them again and I would love to but with no job and whatnot it’s not possible and yes I’m fucking jealous for anyone who gets to see them, at least I admit it. *shrugs*

I would ask some people to do me a favor but I know they will forget or never do it, I’ve asked for favor’s in the past and it never got done, oh well. Someday eventually I’ll see them live and meet them, let’s only hope. Eh.

Wow, I cannot believe that the convention is next month, I’m not even ready for it to be honest, ha! I have 60.00 saved up so far, no flight yet, ha!

I’m actually starting to get nervous bout the event, like I have no idea what to wear, or the people I’m staying with, etc.

*sighs*

I think I’m going to catch up my show’s I haven’t been able to watch any of my show’s so I have 2 tapes to watch, *sighs*

I really wish people would get over the fact of some of my music I enjoy, seriously, just because I listen to a certain artist or band, it’s not like I would make them listen to it, *shrugs*

That’s it for now…

My foot is killing me, I have no idea what I did to it either, but it’s been like this for awhile and I have no insurance to get it looked at, ugh!

Much Love.