I know about the sleep regression at 18 months, but I'm almost convinced my 16-month-old is going through it prematurely. Her bedtimes (and sometimes naps) have just been awful the past few weeks. I know she's tired but she's absolutely riled up (despite us trying to be mellow to set the tone for bedtime) and just refuses to sleep. It makes us absolutely crazy and frustrated, to the point where I wanted to throttle her (and sometimes, her daddy, who's sprawls half on the floor and half on the beanbag and tosses out the odd comment to our baby who's playing by herself three feet away, and he considers this "watching the baby"... but that's another story!). And then she finally goes to bed late and does something ridiculous like wake up early. Seriously, child, sleep in! I don't know which is worse -- that, or the constant whiny lawn-mower sounds she makes at 2am, while not in deep sleep and popping on and off the boob. Arggggh. Sleep has become such a battleground. Has anyone else dealt with something like this pre-18-month-sleep regression? Please tell me it gets better. I hate, hate, hate being so frustrated with my otherwise very adorable munchkin. It makes me feel like such an awful parent. [/end rant] Thanks for listening!!

Two questions from a new mom here. Our son is just 2 weeks old, which would be why I'm posting at 3am in between a set of cluster feeding, *sigh*. Neither my husband or I planned on co-sleeping once we had kids, we've just kind of been playing a lot of stuff by ear and going with what feels right, and co-sleeping so far is what feels right for us. (His family is not supportive of co-sleeping, and my family doesn't talk about... anything, so I've been looking online for resources, advice etc.)

Ok, so first, I didn't see anything in the memories on this - my husband snores. Like, a lot and often very loudly. It doesn't seem to bother our son at all, but since he's so little I know when he's actually in deep sleep he can sleep through almost anything. Is the snoring likely to start bothering him at some point, and if so at what age? My husband's snoring still drives me crazy, yes after 5 years, but the baby could probably hear those snores in the womb, so for all I know it may be normal to him.

Second- and this is more of an opinion poll- how do you arrange blankets for you and your infant when co-sleeping? Do you just swaddle him and put him on top of your covers? Do you share your blankets with him? Our son seems a bit weird in that he only sometimes likes to be swaddled. Sometimes he loves it and sometimes he'll scream and kick until his legs are free.

I just want to cry on your shoulder. I don't think anything could be done. But it was unexpected, REI didn't tell us a word about possible custom charges and... oh, I guess I just have to take it like my husband took it - just pay and forget about it and use the carrier... Here is what happened: the postman just came - finally, with a huge box from REI - but he told us that we have to pay $35 of customs dues - the Canada customs decided to pick us "at random", as he said and now we have to pay another surcharge - the carrier itself was $200, +$50 S&H and now another $35 (( I asked the postman to take the parcel back to the post office (it can stay there for 15 days anyway) and quickly typed an e-mail to REI customer service. Nowhere down the purchase process we were warned about possibility of such surcharge. If we knew there is a slight chance to win this "lottery" we won't take risks and won't buy the thing.
So I am awaiting for REIs answer - I asked them to reimburse us and explained why. We are so disappointed, we really wanted this thing, even if it was so expensive. My husband, like many men, just says: Pay the customs and take the thing, but I just can't bear it.
Oh, I am upset...

hi all-
My dd is 3 years and one month. She is primarily cloth diapered. She shows little to no interest in toilet learning. I am a working mom on a leave of absence until the end of October, so I am looking to begin the toilet teaching process - in a gentle, easygoing way - before the end of OCt and it gets hectic again with me at work. I dont know anything about disposable pull-ups, training pants? Any sugestions? I am also reading ELizabeth Pantley's No Cry Toilet Solution.

We own an Elmo potty and a sticker chart but Lily shows no interest in these. She poops once a morning, and doesn't hide or anything. SHe just gets quiet, concentrates for a moment, and then goes on about her business. We have been playfully and gently saying, want to go on the potty and he says no and then we drop it. Once in a blue moon, she will poop in her nightly bath and gets upset about seeing it or being around it. We try not to make her feel like she did anything wrong, but she sees us hurrying to clean it up.

Ideas? tia

Has anyone tried these? I want to because they are cheaper than BumGenius and FuzziBunz, but I was wondering how the leak situation is with them. I am looking to buy about 12 diapers to mix in with my prefolds, Dappis, and other pricier pocket diapers.

We have this baby carrier, BabyTrecker. We have even 2 of them. It's called Baby Trekker. I don't know why I am doing them a free advertising :) since I design and make my own baby wraps and slings, but they are so good, so I just have to say it. My question is: did anybody outside of Canada ever hear about this Baby Trekker, or is it just a Canadian thing? I know that it was designed and manufactured by a family in BC or something.
Here is the picture of it - my husband is wearing our daughter, 9 months old. She is, btw, wearing a sundress I just designed - great for back carry position since it has a hood - no more fallen sunhat or a hat which slides over her eyes and "I can't fix it without help from another person since the baby is on my back"
( picture of the BabyTrekker ).

Ok, so here's my situation; generally my 7 week old is fine, but occasionally (like, every baby I'm sure) she has super fussy spells where nothing makes her happy (not eating, being changed, changing room temp, holding her, dancing with her, etc).
My husband is impatient and gets frustrated very easily so his response to this is to first loudly tell her to "stop yelling"...um, yeah honey, she's 7 weeks old, she's super logical right now...and then he tells me we should just put her in another room and let her cry since nothing is going to make her stop. Ugh.
So, what can I tell him to help him see that this is wrong? He admits that she isn't trying to manipulate us, but he just doesn't want to listen to her if she's crying for "no reason" (and just for the record, I can't really take her in another room with me, b/c we're living with my parents and her crying would drive them bonkers too...).

Also, when she gets like this he tends to take her away from me and not give her back b/c he's so insistent that he knows what he's doing and that his method (practically yelling at her) is the right way...he doesn't seem to understand the biological response I have when she's crying...any advice?

EDIT: I know he'll be much more comfortable with her when she's older and I do think he's a good dad, he's just being so stubborn about this!

Sorry if this doesn't really fit here, I'm not sure where else to ask:

I've been breastfeeding baby for a month now, and I think I have a thrush infection in my milk ducts. Baby shows no symptoms that I can tell, but every article online that I'm reading leads me to believe this is the source of the pain I'm experiencing. Firstly, is it alright that I wait until monday to call the doctor's office (obviously they aren't in today)? I may not get to see the doctor until weds. anyhow. Also, is it alright to see my ob gyn for this?

Okay so I've been a long time commenter and reader of this community, but this is my first post I think...

My son is 23 months old (on the 12th of this month) and he is making me BATTY lately!  He not only refuses to listen to "no" but he completely ignores it.  And now it's starting to be with dangerous things...like reaching his hand up to the stove, trying to open the oven while I cook, or best yet RUNNING INTO THE STREET!  

I can provide more info but I am currently trying to cook and watch him, so all I ask is...do you have any suggestions on what to do?!  I hate yelling, but nothing else seems to work.  He blatantly ignores me.  And I don't want to hit him (though I have taken his hand and smacked it before and it makes me feel terrible!)  Time outs don't do much but make him SCREAM and CRY and I don't much understand how to do time-outs with a child his age. 

I have tried to explain things to him when he does wrong, but he seems insistent on doing the opposite of what I say.  I'm sure it's just a stage, but it's starting to scare me when he does dangerous things.  I never have him out of my sight...but he is SO FAST lol.  And it's cute, but I don't want him getting hurt!  HELP!

 Do anyone have this? Do I need to purchase a mattress for this? Or is it all included in the box? TIA!

DD is 10 months old, and literally can not stand it if i am doing something else. I can not even wash dishes. She is fine for a few minutes in the living room a few feet away, then she will crawl over to where im standing and ball, until i pick her up.
It is getting worse and worse every day. If i want to shower, i have a window of 2 minutes until she starts getting upset. Sometimes she can be entertained by DH for 5 minutes and then the crying starts.
Today I attempted to drive the car, while my husband sat in the back with her, as soon as i sat down in the drivers seat she freaked and started crying, BIG TEARS! So we had to switch and i got back there with her and all was fine and she fell asleep.
DH has started to feel that she is rejecting him because i am the only one that can console her, I try to explain, that it is because she's with me 24/7 and he goes to work. But he still feels like she doesn't love him. I try to tell him I am the caregiver and he is the provider, and that his role is just as important. He insisted today it is because we are co-sleeping. but I dont think that is the reason. He also was deployed to Iraq all of my pregnancy, but was injured when she was just six weeks old, so he came back...and we have only been separated for 1.5 months since then. He insists that it is because he spent that time apart from her, that she never formed a close bond with him early on. I just don't buy it, because he has been with us other than work for 8 of her 10 months of life.
I am at a loss, i don't know what to do? I don't want to ignore her, and I need to help my husband realize she loves him just as much. What can i do?
I have even put off going to the dentist (i have decaying tooth, that definitely needs extraction) for fear of leaving her with someone and her freaking out! I could bring along MIL, but i don't know if she could come into the room with me at the dentists, and even if she did, she would be squirming to get to me!
I know that this anxiety is normal, and it's a phase, but how do i console my husband who feels rejected.
I got tickets to see No Doubt for mother's day, and now i don't think we will be able to go. Should we sell those tickets?

I'm posting on behalf of a new friend. She's just moved back to Australia with her two-and-a-half-year-old son. The situation is a little complicated. From what I understand, she broke up with her son's Dad in part because he was such a detached parent and she realised she couldn't co-parent with him. They were living in Europe together... then he moved back to Australia and she and her son moved to Scotland where her son made a really terrific attachment to his grandpa. Now she and her son are back here, because she felt bad about her son growing up so far away from his Dad. Her ex said to come and live with him while she looks for a place of her own and she was hopeful he would take this opportunity to get to know his son better but it's straight back to old tricks: "It's 7pm, shouldn't you be getting F to bed?" rather than actually helping F get to bed on his own.

Anyway, while she wouldn't necessarily call herself an "attachment parent", she follows a lot of the precepts. F was breastfed until very recently, she carried him in a sling, they did baby sign language, she explains things to him wherever possible. The problem is that since he's come back to Australia, he's started having serious tantrums in the evenings and he's not sleeping as well as he did. She knows it's not surprising given all the upheaval, but the tantrums are getting worse not better. The local health nurse is not attachment-focussed at all and has told her that a child his age can't understand her explanations and she just needs to pull the authority card. She's uncomfortable with that. She thinks F is frustrated and wants his Dad's attention... She knows he misses his family in Europe and every night he talks to his grandparents on Skype so he can see them...

Any suggestions for how to handle this? They'll be moving out from her ex's place as soon as possible, but in the meantime, oh wise ones, what can she try?

I'm hoping to hear from Moms and Dads who have had issues with their toddlers playing with their own poop, or from anyone who has advice or suggestions on the matter. I'm getting really frustrated!

I have a 2.5 year old daughter who is not potty trained. She goes down for a nap in her room at about noon, which is also often the time that she poops every day. She used to let me know when she had pooped, if it happened while she was trying to go to sleep, so that I could go in and change her. In the past month or so, though, she's started to take off her pants and diaper when she goes, and then tries to "clean up," meaning that the poo ends up everywhere. Then she'll sit in there quietly for a long time, probably because she's ashamed of what's happened. Sometimes I'm not aware of what's happened for over an hour, because I've assumed that she was asleep, since she's been so quiet.

We've tried talking to her about it, having her sit on the potty for ten minutes before naptime (this is always difficult for us and her - I don't think she's ready to be potty trained), moving naptime (NOT a good idea), and, finally, just putting pants on her that we didn't think she could take off. Unfortunately, she's getting better at taking off pants and overalls, and today was the worst mess she's ever made (poo on the walls, all over the bed, all over her, some on the floor, etc).

Other factors:
-She has a baby sister who is nearly 3 months old. She's very good with her little sister, and I try to give her as much Mommy time as possible, but of course the attention isn't as much as she's used to getting.
-She's been off and on interested in trying to use the potty, but it's not going well yet. I've decided to just let her tell me when she wants to go, because "making" her sit on the potty when she doesn't ask never turns out well. Nothing happens, and it doesn't take long for both of us to be frustrated.
-She's not in day care; I'm a stay at home mom and we have a fairly regular routine. If she doesn't get her nap on time, my typically sweet daughter turns into Toddler From Hell. Moving her naptime back an hour or two is not an option, and likely wouldn't help, anyways, since she doesn't always have a BM at naptime.

I know that being angry and frustrated with her is NOT going to help, but it's getting to the point where I just can't hide my annoyance and disappointment. I usually have to put down my 2 month old and listen to her cry while I clean up my daughter and her room, and it's just wearing me down. Please help!

ok, my little nursling is 16 months old.  his nursing isnt really causing a problem, in the sense that he doesnt want to feed every minute of every day lol.  he nightweaned all by himself at 11 months, and for a couple months his nursing was so infrequent that i thought he was about to self wean! so, when he started wanting to feed more (around 14 months) i was over the moon. i always planned to feed him until he weaned himself but i wasnt counting on that to happen until he was 3 or 4.

anyway, my issue is his manner of feeding now.  if he is sleepy, he will cuddle up on my lap and feed wonderfully. however, more often than not his feedings involve sitting upright on my lap (straddling me, if you will) and popping off, then back on, then back off, then screaming the place down if i DARE put the num nums away.  Lol, if he had it this way i would be hanging them out all day!!  sometimes i have to stop him because he is so rough with me. he will latch on, real hard, and shake his head from side to side, back and forth, blow raspberries etc.  The raspberies i can get on board with lol, its kinda funny, but its becoming increasingly difficult to feed in public.  plus the head shaking and pulling around.... well, it really, really hurts.

I have tried just taking him off and telling him that he has to be gentle with mummy but he just throws a fit.  if he does his on/off/on/off routine, i just put them away and tell him that he has had his chance to feed properly and now he has to wait - sometimes he will cry, other times he will wander off before coming back to poke them/slap them really hard until i get the "nnn nnn nnn" back out again. He does understand the concept of rough and gentle, like if he pinches me i tell him that i dont like to be pinched, and ask him to show me gentle, and he will stroke and kiss me all better lol. he understands, but not well enough to use that knowledge in this situation, if you know what i mean.

It is much easier to deal with this when at home, his tantrums are more easily managed there and if i feel like just giving in, i can without feeling judged. As im sure most of you will know, when your baby is screaming for booby your body just.... wont let you not feed, you know? I dont want to deprive him of any feeds, i have always fed on demand and i want to continue that, he just doesnt seem to understand yet what i am asking him to do (or not do).

So how did you teach your babies "nursing manners" with the minimum of aggravation? i had better go now, as said nursling is once again pinching and poking the num nums...... *sigh*

I have a 16-month-old whose only source of fluid, beyond anything found in the solids she eats, is breastmilk. She's had water before, but that happens rather occasionally, like if we're out for a walk and we offer her some water from our bottle. She used to have a bit of water with her meals, way back when she was being fed. But she's been feeding herself for quite a while now, and when asked if she'd like some water, she almost always shakes her head no. The very few times she's said yes, she's ended up dipping her fingers in the water and then very gleefully dumping the water all over her tray table (and after splashing her hands in the water, she tries to drink nothingness from her cup). She has no interest in a sippy cup beyond chewing on the soft spout. We tried offering her cow's milk but she kept shaking her head no. We don't want to force anything on her, but it'd probably be a good idea for her to drink something besides breastmilk (as you might imagine, she nurses a million times a day... or what feels like it sometimes!). Do you guys have any ideas as to how to get her to do so? Thanks in advance!

 I am new mom to an 11week old daughter. Since she has been born I have pretty much carried her (in my arms or a sling carrier) most of the time. I also had not planned to co-sleep but it has been what felt right since she came home from the hospital. Recently she wants nothing to do with anyone but myself. Family comes over and wants to hold her and they maybe get to hold her for 2 minutes before she starts hysterically crying! They try and calm her down by walking around the house and talking to her but she just keeps screaming uncontrollably. All I want to do when she cries like that is take her away from them because I know that once she is in my arms she will immediatly become calm again. I am just at a loss as to what to do? If I should just politely take her away from them and calm her down or should I really be allowing other people to try and calm her even though she cries so hard she almost gets sick!? It just breaks my heart to see her so upset and scared especially knowing that if I hold her she will stop crying. The worst part is she even does this to her dad now. He gets time with her in the evenings when they play and she is calm and happy but if she starts screaming she will not stop unless I take her in my arms. I have been trying to let him try and soothe her. He will try and talk with her and hold her but after like 10 or 15 minutes she has cried so hard she doesnt even have a voice left and she starts coughing and choking from her screams...so I then take her from him. He is starting to get really frustrated (understandable!). He told me last night he thought that she was too dependent on me and that maybe if I didnt carry her around all the time that she wouldnt act like she does when others hold her. He thinks she should be able to start self soothing a little bit. I just dont agree with that. I just dont know what to do? I feel like I am doing everything I can for my daughter right now but I am starting to question whether or not I am holding her back in some way from being close to other people, mainly her dad!? I have felt like the right thing to do is try and let her be with her dad as much as possible when she is calm and happy but when she starts to scream to take her back because I feel like maybe then she can become more comfortable around and not associate him with crying and screaming?! But I really do want him to be able to soothe her too! I would love some feedback or opinions!

Hi friends,

My daughter is 16 months old. She's never been a fantastic napper, but in the last few months we had gotten into a pretty good routine involving a morning nap about 3 hours after she wakes, and an afternoon nap 4 hours after awakening from the morning nap. Each nap was between an hour and 1.5 hrs.

In the last 2 weeks, her daytime napping is getting pretty bad again. She takes longer to settle down, and her morning nap is much shorter than it used to be (30 to 45 minutes, down from 1 hr - 1hr 15 min). Her afternoon nap is also getting kind of messed up, with more frequent wakings, and it's shorter, too. She wakes up sometimes chipper and ready to play, and sometimes whiny. In general, her sleep is kind of devolving and she's showing some of the signs that she's not resting really well overall (SIGH - working on this on all fronts).

(Is there a sleep regression I don't know about?)

I'm wondering if maybe she would do better with a single daytime nap after lunchtime, but I don't know how to make that call and then start pushing her to stay awake through the morning.

When do children typically switch from 2x/day to 1x/day? Should I wait and see, or try to help this transition along a little bit? What did you do? What do you think about my situation?

TIA!

My two year old is all of a sudden afraid to go to sleep. The past three nights have been a struggle for my husband and I. We have been cosleeping since birth. when she gets tired and we ask her if she wants to go to bed and she says 'YEAHHHHHH!' we assume that she does indeed want to go to bed. so off to be we go where she then starts like crying like she is terrified of something when we ask her to lay down. we have never seen her cry like that, unless she is hurt or something. my husband who does not like to hear crying wants to let her fall asleep in the living room while watching a movie, but that cant be a solution. naptimes are no problem. we dont want to let her cry herself to sleep, or anything like that. any advice or possible solutions or explanations?

Hi everyone. I just had my daughter a week ago. During my pregnancy, we procured a crib and set it up in our bedroom right next to our bed... I liked the idea of being in the same room with my baby, but didn't think I'd ever be able to actually sleep with her (I am the type of person who needs my OWN space).

Well, as with many "plans" made during pregnancy, that went out the window once she was born. I tried to get her to sleep in the crib a couple times but found that I didn't like being so far away from her... even though it's only a matter of two or three feet! So I brought her into bed with us. However... she sleeps best when she is on my chest. I've tried putting her next to me but she really prefers to be ON me. This actually works great for me... I sleep in a semi-reclined position and cuddle her on my chest, and I feel very attuned to her this way.

What I am wondering, though, is how safe this is. I know babies are supposed to sleep on their backs, but does this also count when they are actually sleeping ON you as opposed to next to you? I've tried to research this a little bit but haven't had much luck. In one of the Dr. Sears books it says that babies sleeping on the chests of parents is fine, but I don't know if that means just a short nap, or all night long.

So, what say you? Can I continue this sleeping arrangement (which I really LOVE, by the way), or should I curb it and try to get her to sleep along side me instead (I do plan on doing this anyway once she is older, but if it's a safety issue obviously I'll hasten it)?

We're currently setting up our nursery, and I'm sorry if this isn't the place to ask, but I'll give it a shot anyway. We're sidecarring our crib in the bedroom, so we aren't sure what bed to put up in the actual nursery. We have a bassinet and a pack n play. I have no idea if we'll use whichever bed we put in the nursery, so this might be for nothing. Anybody want to share how they set their nursery up while co-sleeping?