Androgynes

Androgyne living as female...

Thu, 24 Jul 2008 22:15:39 GMT

Hello!

Yeah,i've already post something about this topic,but so...I really need to talk with people like myself...I'm mentally androgyne,feeling both male(and a bio male,by the way)and female,as well as a mixture of male and female.
But(there is always a "but")i don't really want to live as a guy...I want to dress full-time like a female,and kinda living as one too,without hormones and surgeries...So i'm a female presenting androgyne,if that makes sens...

Is there anybody like myself here?

Thanx.

:)

Wed, 23 Jul 2008 23:18:25 GMT

(mods, tell me if this isn't allowed)

I just made a community called heshethey. Its main focus is living genderqueer. There are awesome androgyny/genderqueer communities on LJ (like this one!), but I kind of was looking for one that's more about the day to day aspects of living between gender: names, pronouns, what to do with strangers, what happens when one friend says one thing and one says another...stuff like that. If anyone is interested, please join and post.

day-to-day

Wed, 02 Jul 2008 03:36:29 GMT

Hi. I'm new to this community. I don't really know what I am in terms of gender; it seems like no matter what I say, I'll have at least a week or so somewhere which contradicts that. For a while I thought (currently sort of think) I was/am an ftm. But then I'll have a run of a few days, weeks, whatever in which I don't feel male at all; either I feel female, or like something else.

But this post was mostly to ask how you typically live day-to-day with the rest of society without being male or female. How do you deal with people who ask you outright whether you're a girl or a guy? How do you pick which bathroom to use in public? How do you deal with co-workers and your employers? That sort of thing, I guess..

The thing is, I just don't think I can deal with being a girl or a guy full time. Could anyone give me some tips..?

oh hi

Sun, 29 Jun 2008 16:47:04 GMT

a friend of mine dragged me back to LJ and said i should join this community. i read the profile of it and yea i guess a lot of it makes sense. i really have no idea who i am and i guard my sex like it's precious gold for some odd reason. i'm always dressing neutral and get sir'd and maam'd many times throughout the day. most of the time it's sir? wait maam? sir? ...... maam?

i'm not really sure what the difference is between genderqueer and androgyne is though. i mean internally i bounce around with genders a bit but there's no definite place where anything falls. my utopia would be a place where there is no gender. i like to be seen more as a person than female or male and i feel my internal gender shifts are generally caused by external factors. externally i'm always the same though. jeans and a t-shirt. i've even trained my voice to be in between so people aren't quite sure if i'm a guy with a high voice or a girl with a low one.

i kinda enjoy being in between just to make people think "hey look there IS a gray area with gender" but i'm afraid people generally aren't that smart to think about it more than 5 seconds :( anywho i hope i'm not infiltrating on space i don't belong.

Mon, 16 Jun 2008 15:38:07 GMT

The Gender Public Advocacy Coalition is pleased to announce the release of its 2008 GENIUS Survey in partnership with Ernst & Young. GenderPAC works to ensure that classrooms, communities and workplaces are safe for everyone to learn, grow and succeed.

The Gender Equality National Index for Universities & Schools (GENIUS), GenderPAC’s most recent effort to end discrimination and promote awareness, encourages colleges and universities to recognize the benefits of a GenderSAFE campus - supportive equitable and protective for all students. Choosing to participate in GENUIS sends a strong public statement that bullying or discriminating based on the race, sex or gender of a student, faculty, or staff member is not tolerated at your institution

Fill out the survey at: www.gpac.org/GENIUS2008survey, and make sure that we have data for as many schools as possible. Your voice will help us continue to work towards a safe and welcoming environment for every student

Hail and well met!

Thu, 08 May 2008 12:36:09 GMT

Hi, just though I'd introduce myself.
My name is Fynn - I'm 16 years old, English and bisexual (leaning more towards the lesbian side at the moment)
I'm bio-female but tend to indentify as masculine/neutral: I wear masculine clothing styles (several centuries out of date, it must be said ^-^) and have short hair and a flattish chest, so am often mistaken for a boy (which I get quite pleased about).
So, yeah..um, pleased to meet you - nice to know there are other people like me out there. *is embarrassingly lost for anything else to say*

youtube vid

Tue, 06 May 2008 22:56:58 GMT

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sBCMKmCn0g4&feature=related

Sorry if this was posted before.. Just thought this could be interesting to some of you.

Just thought I'd share.

Mon, 05 May 2008 17:18:43 GMT

'Androgynous Pharaoh had feminine physique'

I thought this was pretty interesting!

Sexual Orientation

Sat, 03 May 2008 15:55:12 GMT

Hey, I am Avery.
In high school I came out as a lesbian. But hated that word, I felt it never fit. Now I realize it is because I am not a girl, so not really a lesbian. I love girls, I have been with lots of them. Dating, sex, fun...whatever the usual.
I am very androgynous physically. I am tall, lean, short hair, no chest, and wear men clothing all the time. I am told I can be femme in my actions, but its not like a girly femme. Its a gay boy flamboyant femme. But I am also very masculine, in a dykey way.
I have never had a boyfriend or kissed a boy up until this summer, when I was kissed by a gay boy.
The last year or so I have realized that what I thought was me admiring and adoring gay boys, is maybe something more. I think I like boys.... mostly gay boys. I have the biggest crush on a straight guy at work. He is a rugged farm boy, but he writes poety and loves art shows, and i do find him very attractive.
Emotionally i think i could have a relationship with a boy, but physically I am at a standstill I dont think it would work.
Because it gets even more complicated.
I look at myself as two halves that are balanced with each other. One is a girl who loves girls. The other is a boy...who loves boys. So I am just gay all around. My girl half does not like boys, but my boy half does.

So for me to be with a guy, it would have to be a gay relationship in my mind.
Just like when I'm with a girl it is a gay relationship.

I am so confused and lost, I feel like i did when i was trying to figure out who i was as a child and teen.
It would help me out tons if anyone can relate or shed some light on this. I just want to understand who i am again.

Hello!

Thu, 01 May 2008 23:08:45 GMT

My name is Renée, and I don't exactly fit inside the box of a typical androgyne. My gender identity is neither male nor female, and without makeup, I tend not to look like a female (I can even grow in a moustache due to weird hormones, which can be a plus at times). My gender presentation is, for the most part, female, but in mind and spirit, I am am completely androgynous. I hope that you'll accept me in your community as a non-typical androgyne. :-) Take care!

Bristol

Thu, 24 Apr 2008 15:59:43 GMT

Hello, anyone from Bristol, here? :)

Sat, 12 Apr 2008 20:48:41 GMT

I was reading an article about people who are like neutrons, who don't really have a "charge" either toward any particular position, who can see both sides of an argument, who stand outside the world, looking on, understanding the reasoning behind people's actions but not really having an opinion about its rightness or wrongness, good or bad. The article can be found here. There was one part I wanted to share that I thought some people here might be able to relate to. I kind of yelled when I read it, because, well... it describes my gender so well. If this post isn't appropriate, tell me and I'll take it down, no prob.

"The neutron itself seems to flip flop between having the properties of a male and having the properties of a female. Some days they appear to be quite feminine and the next day they appear to be quite masculine. I have been accused many times of acting gay and many times of being some stoic male who wants nothing more than sex. If you have a charge, you feel that you should be one way or the other and not really be both, because to have both qualities you are pretty much confusing everyone around you. They don’t understand you. You are intriguing, yet possibly off balance."

I haven't read all of it so there may be more gender-related stuff (it's a whole eBook, and so far I've only read the preview I got in my email), but that's all I found so far. But wow, I was just like...Hey, that's me! Again, sorry if this is inappropriate, but I thought since I was able to relate so much largely because of my admittedly out of the mainstream gender identity, others might also be able to relate.

X-posted to my journal, androgynes and genderqueer.

i'm just an actor

Sun, 02 Mar 2008 14:49:59 GMT

i consider myself bigendered, but it's got a lot more to do with image and aesthetic and role-playing and fantasy than what's underneath. i don't know what's underneath. my female body makes me uncomfortable but i'd also hate to have a penis (i had a dream where i had one once, it was horrifying). i feel out of touch with myself. i love clothing, i love dressing like a boy, i feel a lot more free and glamorous as a boy. i worked as a stripper once and i also loved that, i loved staring at my natural self in the mirror while i danced, dolled up in see-through dresses and makeup, the pinnacle of female eroticism. i like to make up names for myself, for my selves. i wish i was a skinny fourteen-year-old because it's the ambiguous teenage body that i aspire to -- before hips, before breasts, still changeable, malleable. i'm obsessed with iconically ambiguous stars such as bowie and marilyn manson.
thoughts?

i will cross-post this to bigendered, also.

Plastic Surgery?

Tue, 19 Feb 2008 18:39:58 GMT

This is my very first post to this community and to be honest I feel a little crazy about what I am going to ask. Today I was chatting to this person on IRC who was born female but identifies as non-gendered like me. She is very androgynous/slightly feminine looking.

I was wondering whether there are people (born male) who have plastic surgery on their face to look more feminine/androgynous, rather than the complete feminisation.

My gender feels kind of on the feminine side of androgynous with no masculine added (sounds like a cocktail).

intro and binding question

Thu, 14 Feb 2008 23:27:14 GMT

Hello everyone!

I've been on LJ for about 6 and a half years, but recently joined the community. I'm female biologically, but I've recently started labeling myself androgyne. Growing up I never liked dressing feminine, but I never really thought about something like that until recently.

I'm curious about binding. I've recently become interested in binding, and heard that cloth binding is better than some other methods. What's the best method for binding that's not going to hurt my bust too much? Where can I find good binders at a (fairly low price)? I'm a size 36D, so I'm kinda busty and would like something that works well enough at doing some flattening.

Question!...

Wed, 06 Feb 2008 21:55:45 GMT

So...
I was wondering if anybody here feel or want to be this way:Mentally androgynous,feeling like a girl sometimes or like a boy(but not that much,lol)and totally androgynous(not completely one or another)or feeling closer to the feminine gender without feeling totally like a female but wanting to live as one,not just androgynous but looking really like a women without beign totally a transsexual...Do i makes sens?Thanx you.

Thu, 31 Jan 2008 00:23:23 GMT

Hello. I'm Leigh. I'm here because I was born intersex and raised female, an identity which has never really worked well with me. I thought for a time that I might be transgendered, but eventually came to the conclusion that the most comfortable identity for me was a fluid one. I consider myself androgynous, but vaccilate between more masculine and more feminine forms of self-expression -- I am comfortable in both male and female social roles, even though people tend to get a bit confused by the pronouns. Hi!

Am i in the right place?

Wed, 30 Jan 2008 01:33:03 GMT

hi I am new to LJ, and i am a Girl, well its my sex. Growing up I have always been drawn to more masculine things, i hung out with the boys and i dressed like a boy until my mid teens when my parents decided that i should be more feminine, they even sent me to an all girl institution but it did not change the way i felt inside like you know that i should be a boy or something but then at the same time i love being a girl, i still dress like a boy sometimes, i will wear my father's clothes around the house when i'm at home by myself or when when i'm permitted i will go out in a T-shirt and baggy jeans, and whenever i go out like this people mistake me for a boy but when they do it i'm not offended and i dont think i should be.
but my main problem is the fact that even though i have been socialized as a girl I have this strong desire to assume a more masculine role which conflicts my conscience because i was raised as a christian but it's seems that all my desires/ thoughts stand in opposition to everything i have been taught.
I think i'm rambling now, i don't even know if i'm in the right place. could someone give me some advice of even point me in the right direction? please, i would appreciate it alot.

My Thoughts on Gender & "Me"

Tue, 29 Jan 2008 10:51:15 GMT

I have been having some interesting thoughts and feelings lately and wanted to share them. I wondered whether there were any other people who agree or disagree with my new stance on things.

In my opinion there really is no such thing as a finite man or a woman in a gender related sense. There are definitely many people who are physically male and female, but gender as a means to encapsulate these forms does not make so much sense. I believe that gender is mostly an artificial concept that has arisen from society’s need for order.

The binary gender concept has been used as a way to keep people who appeared in a certain role to perpetuate Western society (I speak of Western society because I was born and raised within it). This seems to be a pretty efficient way to create order on the surface. There must have been so much push and power behind making sure males were men and females were women. In these modern times, however, the ideas and feelings are changing. In relation to this it could be suggested that the binary gender system we know of now was never in born in us in the first place.

If the binary gender is an artificial concept created by eons of society then maybe any other genders that are expressed aren’t real either and just an act of expression. Binary gender is all around us wherever we go, and we can’t escape it. Gender has been perpetuated throughout generations. A little girl or a little boy is bombarded with gender since day one. Gender almost becomes something we accept without question.

This brings me to wonder whether Gender Dysphoria would exist if there were no such binary gender construct existing in Western society. Some Transvestites wear clothing associated with the female sex and feel they are expressing their femininity through this expression. They may sometimes adopt what they deem a female role. I believe this is another example of gender taking its hold on society and the trouble it causes. It is also suggested that Drag Queens create an illusion of being a woman. This is, however, only showing how much of an illusion and flawed gender really is.

If males display traits that are considered feminine, society believes these people deviate from the gender norm. The opposite could be said about females displaying traits that are considered masculine. There are too many examples in the world like this who are often feel comfortable as males or females to the point that they don’t want or need to change their sex or even their “gender”. For a start this suggests that there is no such thing as masculine and feminine traits. There is too much overlap to suggest gender is real.

Many years ago I believed someone was a man or woman because of certain personality traits. We can’t deny that behaviour must be due to nature due to sex hormones you have or the way your brain is configured. I have relinquished myself of the terms man and woman in my life now. There is not enough evidence for me to believe they naturally exist.

I believe I exist in a non-gendered state of mind today where I have found many advantages and disadvantages. One advantage is that I have freed myself from my own personal rules of the binary gender and am learning how to express myself in a more relaxed manner. It does feel quite difficult to expression ones freedom from gender in society where it exists all around. Freeing me from the male gender was a step I was partially subconsciously and consciously over Christmas 2007. There were many fears or the unknown and anxieties about my existence as I went along but now I am becoming calmer.

It is, however, slightly un-chartered territory and I am slowly working out how to express who I am and my appearance. My preference of appearance tends to fall on the feminine side and not the androgynous side of things. I do tend to feel more comfortable on the female side of society.

I am, however, in a slightly sheepish way trying to physically and mentally emphasise to people that I am not a man. This does seem to involve feminisation though I do not rule out creating a non male or female appearance. The latter does not really make much sense in my life at the moment. I am still working with ideas about changing my sex. I reiterate that I do not want to change genders for it is no sense.

Circumstances have allowed me to be a genderless person and that I will always be. I often wonder how I would have been as a person if I had been born female. It would be nice to think I would be genderless but I really think I would have fallen into a female gender role like the majority and not posed any questions towards it.

I feel sad that nature didn’t allow me to have a female body and instead gave me a body that doesn’t fit properly. My life journey is no longer about gender and is more about finding a comfortable place to exist. I like to think that one day I will find where I fit into the human race. If it be female then I will be one heck of a cool female, if it will be neutral then I will be one heck of a cool neutral person, if it be male then it will be one heck of a cool androgynous person. I look forward to the getting somewhere and am on my way as I speak.

Zane

Mon, 28 Jan 2008 21:01:49 GMT

Hi, the name that I go by is Zane. And like I just read on someone else's post, when Im called by my girl name it does feel like a slap in the face. So Zane is what I go with now. Well, for a long time, I thought that I was transgendered. Im biologically female. And wear mens clothes, and breast bind as well, but once I started to feel like I identified as an FTM , I felt vey repressed, and even that this wasn't entirely me. Then I read about androgyny. And I have come to realize that, Im an androgyne. I exhibit both female and male characteristics, and feelings. And if I act in strictly one manner of gender, or try to look like just one gender, it doesn't feel right at all. I feel like somethings missing. But now I understand. I would allways think to myself : "why can't you just figure out what gender you are allready?! Which one is it? Male or Female?" And when I would try and pin point it to either, I felt very uncomfortable.
I feel like a weight has been somewhat lifted off of me. And that I can ignore the pressure, and accept who I really am. But Im having trouble identifying my sexual orientation. I mean, Im very atracted to females, but does that make me straight, gay, or what? Anyone here have those questions too? I mean, its very confusing. I feel that I am only attracted to females, but am both sexes myself. I'd really like to talk to someone on here, :)

"men style" clothing for (small) women?

Wed, 02 Jan 2008 17:20:18 GMT

Hi there, my problem is as follows: I am a small (157 cm) biological female (from Europe) who hateshateshates the clothing industry for not providing the clothes I want. I hate 99,9% of what's offered in the women's section because the stuff is all too feminine for me. Yuck. Men's stuff looks cool but is waaaaaaaaay too big. Occasionally I find something I like in the boy's section, but very often the sleeves are too short for me. So I was wondering if there's a (online?) clothing line out there offering 'men style' clothing in small sizes. Has anyone here had similar problems? I'm mostly okay as far as casual clothes are concerned, most long-sleeve shirts in the H&M boys section are okay for me but I'm fucked when it comes to more elegant stuff (shirts, suits etc.). I've heard that tailoring in East-Asia is really cheap, if I ever manage to get there I'm gonna get my own tailored suit... :P

Binding?

Tue, 18 Dec 2007 15:40:23 GMT

Crap, I feel incredibly awkward and clueless for asking this, but… there’s really no one else I can ask without getting a weird look. Um… how do you bind your breasts? I’ve been using gauze, and it’s doing an OK job, but it comes apart a lot. Maybe I’m tying it wrong, or doing it wrong in its entirety? I’ve also heard of breast binders, but I have no idea where to get them, or even what the heck they are. So… anyone have any tips that I could utilize?

Sorry if I’m frustrating anyone with my ignorance, but I really would like to know….

Gender Crime

Mon, 03 Dec 2007 06:06:03 GMT

Hey! This is something I've worked on for a little while. After years of being told I should be what I am, I've had to push back to fight for who I am.

Little girl
Cut your hair
It's much too long
And they might call

Gender crime, gender crime!
The sirens ring
It seems you've done some unsightly thing
Gender crime, gender crime!
The sirens alarm
They're coming to get you
To change who you are

So pack up your skirts and binders and things
We're off to the land of the Androgynous King
Away from the normies who avoid where you tread
They'd rather farewell your devious trend

And so they call...

An existance defined
Behaviour demands
A certain stereotype
They can't understand
Afraid that human is human
Afraid of identity lost
Afraid of how much the social reconstructin would cost

And so they call, and so they call-

GENDER CRIME

If anyone has anything to share I'd like to see it. Besides, that's what communities are for XD Inputs also appreciated. I'd like this to be a positive place we can discuss all sorts of things in so I am also going to ask if anyone has any recommendations for songs, movies, or books.

I have just been introduced to the Dresden Dolls. A few of their songs deal with gender identity issues. Gorgeously irked music. Painfully mocking. I am a non-fiction reader. Currently I'm reading The End of Gender by Shari Thurer :D My favorite movie is Party Monster. I think it fits just by having people be who they want to be when they want to be it. Awesome. I'm not really good at this rec things so there you go!

Let's Get This Started

Wed, 28 Nov 2007 04:44:15 GMT

So we have a pronoun problem. I'm thinking, even if it's only in the community, do you want to decide on a medium? I was figuring:

He/She = E
Him/Her/His = Hoi

I thought a lot about it. If any of you have suggestions drop it in. I'd personally like to see it in use but I'd like to know the opinions on this. Thanks in advance for the feed back.

Hi, I'm Blake

Mon, 26 Nov 2007 01:43:33 GMT

So, hi, everybody. As I said, I'm Blake [that's not my real name, it's the name I choose to go by.... this may sound strange, but my female name feels like a slap in the face every time someone calls me it], and I'm bio female, but gender-wise... I'm thinking that I most likely am androgynous, but I have not ruled out the possibility that I am bi-gender. As for pronoun usage, I really don't like labels, but pronouns seem to be an unfortunate necessity in our society: so I prefer either gender-neutral pronouns, or 'he' and 'him'. I'm 17 years old, and I'm living a conservative part of town, in a conservative state. So, currently, I am only out to two of my closest friends. In fact, if I came out to anyone else, I doubt they'd believe me; I behave like a female in day-to-day life, because that's what I've been trained to do. Um... I don't know what else to say...
I'm still having trouble accepting the fact that I'm part of the trans community, but I feel that pursuing these feelings is the only way I'll ever achieve happiness in my life. I really despise gender roles. I mean, I really hate them: they're horrible and confining. I also wish to appear as androgynous, but I'm having some trouble in that regard.
So, yeah, that's me, and I look forward to connecting on here, and finding some answers for myself.
~ Blake W.