allthejellies

[ ff : within 1/2 ]

2009-07-17T03:12:47Z

Title: Within (1/2)
Author: Gomes
Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Pairing: Giles/Buffy
Rating: NC17
Warnings: Torture, violence, strong sexual themes
Tags: AU Adventure
Spoilers: General knowledge
Summary: “Sometimes, the person you trust the least proves to be your destined ally.”
Disclaimer: All known characters and premises belong to their respective owners. So there.
Notes: Written for the summer_of_giles event.

ChapterOne

xposted to buffy_giles

Fic: Sister, Sister (3/5)

2009-07-16T19:53:14Z

How much is Declan like his father?

Sister, Sister - Chapter Three

Fic : The Notebook

2009-07-16T06:48:33Z

Title: The Notebook
Author:theoreme
Pairing: B/G friendship (I hope it's alright to post this here)
Rating: FRT
Summary: A Watcher’s mind is like a cemetery
Warnings: none.
Length: 2601
Timeline : Season 7. Picks up at the end of LMPTM.
Disclaimer: I’m just playing with Joss’ shiny toys.
Note : No beta, alas. Don’t hesitate to tell me if I have butchered the English language.

Buffy was fuming. How did he dare disappear for an entire day when too much was at stake? It was dangerous outside and she didn’t have the time to worry about him. Nor the inclination, she realized. Due to his little stunt with Wood earlier, she was more than angry with the man. He spent his time acting all moral and righteous and when someone put him back in place, he went sulking outside.

He could come back or not, see if she cared. Right now, she had a job to do and a war to win. And more precisely, she needed to go on patrol. She sighed and went to prepare her supplies.

Couple of stakes, check. Small dagger, check. Cross around the neck, check. Holy water? Damn, her bottle was nearly empty. She was already using the Scoobies’ last stock and none of them had had time to go to the church to bring back some. But she was sure that Rupert "Cautious Man" Giles would have some left. Maybe he could still help – or at least his ammunitions could.

“Will, do you know where Giles keeps his holy water supply? Mine’s empty and I really don’t want to go patrolling without.”

“Uh, he has some in his emergency backpack, I think. Buff, I’m not sure that he’s going to like that- ”

“Don’t care, especially when he isn’t here.”

***

His old and battered backpack –the one he carried on his Potentials rescue missions- was near the camp bed he used when he was in Sunnydale. Buffy frowned. She has no idea how someone so tall could achieve a proper night of sleep on that small and lumpy thing. It certainly didn’t help to improve his mood.

She started to go through his backpack. Stakes, an emergency kit, a few granola bars, cigarettes, a small dagger… Wait! Since when did Giles smoke? Buffy’s frown intensified. She had hoped it was only a Ripper thing, but he seemed to have carried on. Well, whatever. She finally found one of his holy water flasks. She was putting the backpack away when she noticed a black notebook in one of its pockets. Curiosity won and she grabbed the small object.

It looked old, with a soft and creased leather cover. The lack of title added to the mystery. It was surprisingly heavy even though it couldn’t have been bigger than her hand. She opened to the first page and immediately recognized the writing.

Rupert Adrian Giles, Field Watcher (1979), Chosen Watcher (1981), Active Watcher (1997), Last Watcher (2002)

Buffy could see that the words hadn’t been all written at the same time and that he had been shivering while writing the last ones.

Obituarium

Observo atque custodio

Buffy recognized Latin but she didn’t have the faintest idea of what it meant. The pages of the notebook felt weird, thin and pale, like the ones of her Mum’s old Bible, but strangely strong and Giles’ fountain pen didn’t damage them. She turned the first page, stared, read a little and started to turn the pages quicker and quicker. Something in this book was making her uneasy and she didn’t relish the feeling. She closed the book and ran in her room, closing the door behind her.

Sitting on her bed, she opened the notebook once more. The pages were covered with an endless list of names and dates, with sometimes a few comments of Giles.

The very first entry, whose ink started to fade, read Lucy Emily Hopkins (06/14/1970 – 16), killed by an unknown vampire, Father’s Slayer. Childhood friend and the very last, still fresh, Amanda Thompson (03/25/2004 - 18), killed by the vampire nicknamed Spike. Below the last entry were a few dots, indicating that Giles had other names to add but hadn’t yet done it, maybe by lack of time or sufficient knowledge.

Something went very cold inside Buffy’s throat as she began to understand what she held in her hands. To confirm it, she searched a date that she knew as well as her birthday. Buffy Anne Summers (05/22/2001 - 20), sacrificed herself to save the fucking world, my Slayer, my beautiful Slayer.

She choked, moved both by the words –the only acknowledgment she had of Giles’ grief- and by the act in itself. The book only contained names of dead people. All the dead people Giles had once known. He kept this awful list with him all the time and, Buffy felt slightly nauseous at the thought, he updated it. Furthermore, the pages looked well-worn, as if someone kept turning them, and Buffy could only see too clearly Giles reading the names over and over. The whole thing was sick, but she couldn’t stop to look into it and started again at the beginning.

She had known that his father was also a Watcher, but not that he had been in charge of a Slayer. In the privacy of her bedroom, where she could let down her guard a little, she abandoned her general’s ruthless behavior and grieved for her fellow Slayer.

Randall’s name soon followed and for a long time after that, the young Giles only recorded Potentials’ deaths and victims of vampires and demons. A few Watchers too, killed in action. They were young and Giles’ lapidary epitaphs (such as Killed in exercise, Nice bloke or roommate) let her think that they had been in training together. She hadn’t realized that it had been so dangerous, even deadly. The Council had been ever crazier than she thought, sacrificing not only the Slayers but also their own recruits.

She soon arrived to Sunnydale’s inked memorial and decided to only take a few glances, not wishing to remember all the deaths that had occurred. God, she didn’t want to find Angel’s. She still blanched at Mrs. Calendar entry, killed by the vampire nicknamed Angelus, who had lost his soul. Giles had not been able to add a single comment.

However, there were more names that she could remember and she realized that she didn’t even recognize the majority of them. Had they been so many? She already felt so tired with all the ones she could remember, so why did Giles choose to carry them all with him?

And then she began to find comments she wished she hadn’t seen. She knew she would never forget them.

Killed in a brawl induced by a love spell. Alexander Harris’ fault.

Killed during an attack on my flat. Willow Rosenberg’s spell. Was a nice neighbor.

Tortured and left to starve by the U.S. military. My fault, couldn’t find him in time, should have realized, I’m so sorry, Ethan.

Died because Buffy could not see the demons. Spell cast by Tara Mclay.

Was burned alive because of a spell. Alexander Harris’s fault.

Died because Buffy didn’t know quickly how to defeat the demon. My failure as a Watcher, should have been there.

So many names were followed by one of their own. She hadn’t known, she hadn’t realized, she hadn’t tried to.

She slowly arrived to the last part of the notebook. And two terms filled the pages: Potential and Watcher. He hadn’t told her that so many girls couldn’t be saved (… Killed by a Harbinger. Killed by a Harbinger. Killed by a Harbinger. Killed by a Harbinger..), but she had at least thought about it. It had not been the case with the Watchers and suddenly pages contained only them, the majority killed by the explosion. She found Travers, whose second name was surprisingly Brian.

The worst came with a page devoted only to the Giles that had been killed that day and it seemed that the entire family had been working for the Council. Father, mother, a younger sister that Buffy never knew he had, an uncle, three cousins, a nephew and a great-aunt. Oh Giles. And he didn’t say anything, even when they had joked about Travers being blown up as well as the other “tweedy bastards”.

He should have told her. The burden of this list was too heavy for him alone and so many names weren’t his to carry.

***

“You already stripped me from my dignity. Could you at least respect my privacy?”

His voice was soft, as always, but held a blankness she had not heard in a long time. Buffy was startled. Engrossed in the notebook and her thoughts, she had not heard him coming. She closed the book and turned towards him.

She had heard his voice, so it had to be him. But he didn’t look like her Watcher. The posture was a classic Giles one: feet firmly on the ground, hands in his pockets, shoulders tensed in a certain way. However, something was amiss and she only discovered what when she reached his eyes. There was no warmth there, no emotion, as if Giles had carefully and methodically put away all his feelings before entering her room. He seemed not to care and it made him look like a stranger. She could do the same thing. Hell, she had been doing it for days.

“You’re in my bedroom, so I don’t think you can play the privacy-card right now.”

However, her voice wasn’t as hard as she would have liked it. The list, she thought, I’m still under the shock.

“I’m sorry to importune you while you are rifling through my private affairs. Most inconsiderate of me.”

Snarky Giles at his worst. She tried to regain the righteous anger she had at the beginning of the evening, but it seemed to far (Father. Mother, Mum oh Mum. Damian, my sweet nephew. My failure as a Watcher. It’s my fault. Wasn’t good enough. Killed by the vampire nicknamed Spike. Helena Pimley, we were intimate once. I’m so sorry, Ethan. Had lost his soul). Damn, how was Giles able to function with this on his mind all the time?

Finally, she managed to find her voice, but it wasn’t the cold rage she had hoped, only a shout that seemed too human and vulnerable for her taste.

“You should have told me! We should have known and maybe we would have made fewer mistakes.”

And Giles, because he was still her Watcher even though she had denied him earlier, noticed the difference in her tone. His eyes appeared a bit lighter and his voice was warmer when he spoke.

“You had the world on your shoulders, fighting the dead to keep the living safe and breathing. It already was an endless fight and you didn’t need that weight on your mind. It wasn’t your job; it was mine and still is.”

“How? Why?”

“It’s part of my duty. The Watcher observes, researches, trains and remembers. Remembers all that occurred, especially those who have fallen during his calling. Honoring their memory is one of the responsibilities he has to the world he has sworn to protect. Moreover, he is also the Guardian of the body, of the soul but also of the mind of his Slayer. As much as he can, of course, and this includes her peace of mind. You have no need to remember all the things that happened, because it would be useless and dangerous for your sanity. You sacrifice so much already. However, the Watcher must remember and provide you with remembrance of the past if the circumstances necessitate it. When it can help you to make a decision or to understand the ramifications of an act.”

Killed by the vampire nicknamed Spike. Had lost his soul. Buffy pushed the words at the back of her mind and concentrated on what Giles was telling her. He had used his "teacher" voice and had warmed to his subject during his speech. It was so much more interesting than his bogus lesson earlier in the cemetery and she suddenly realized how much she had missed speaking with Giles and sharpening her mind by doing so.

“It’s like research but with our past, then? It’s another part of the data.”

“Yes. Like the rest of the research, you don’t need to know or remember all of it, but you must know where to find it. And the… data of the consequences of past deeds, especially the deaths, is in this book. The Slayer must not be aware of it, because it can prevent her to make a decision, it can amputate her ability to react quickly and ruthlessly. So the Watcher tells her when he thinks she needs it.”

“And she’s supposed to considerate it and thinks about whatever thing she was going to do.”

“Err, yes”.

“Giles, you should have told me that before today, don’t you realize that? You know how I act, you know how you need to hammer facts into my head and it certainly is not the time for watcher-y subtlety. Because then, I would have explained how your stunt with Spike was a stupid idea even though I now understand why you thought it was necessary, but I would also have explained my own reasons!”

She had shouted the last sentences, losing what remained of her general’s posture. Giles had a bewildered expression on his face and his eyes were no longer cold, but a maelstrom of emotions.

“Giles, you have to tell me things. You have to tell me your thoughts, you have to tell me when the Scoobies intentionally caused the death of someone and not keep it to yourself and you certainly have to tell me when your entire family is killed and it becomes too much, not bury it inside you until you have no feeling left and it turns you into a fucking robot!”

After rambling, Buffy finally broke down and felt her eyes dampening. Giles came to her and in an uncharacteristic gesture –but the day had been anything but normal for both of them- took her in his arms.

She remembered when he had tended her wounds after her Cruciamentum, his silent apology and their tacit reconciliation. She felt that it might go the same way today. She could count their hugs on the fingers of one hand but maybe this rarity explained their power. When he began to speak, she felt it, pressed as she was against his chest.

“I’m sorry, Buffy, I should have talked to you about... about a lot of things. However, this particular burden is meant to be carried only by the Watcher, it is my duty and I would say my honor now, as I, I am the l, last Watcher. About Xander and Willow, be assured that they know the consequences for their actions and they had paid a heavy price for them those last years. Please, don’t take away whatever fire they have left, they are going to need it.”

Their embrace lasted in silence for a while. There was still much to discuss, shout and mend but it didn’t seem as broken as before.

***

Later, when they learned about this preacher man and Buffy was ready to rush into attack, a hand brushed against her shoulder. Eyes filled with sadness and hesitancy, Giles stood next to her and spoke, looking uncertain about the reception of his advice.

“I already wrote down so many names and I know I will write so many more before the end of this. But I don’t want to write them without a… unnecessarily. Please, wait and let us research first.”

Buffy thought about scrambled words and black ink. Every name in that notebook had a heavy weight; she didn’t want him to add one and know that it could have been easily avoided.

“Okay.”

Fic: Sister, Sister (2/5)

2009-07-15T19:42:10Z

Giles gets breakfast in bed and a visitor.

This chapter is rated FRT.

Sister, Sister - Chapter Two

Fic: Sister, Sister (1/5)

2009-07-14T19:44:27Z

Title: Sister, Sister
Author: Froxyn
Rating: FRAO
Pairing: Buffy/Giles
Timeline: Two months after The Fifth of Five.
Synopsis: The time has come for Buffy and Giles to talk to Haddie about the true relationships between her and Katie.
Author's Note: This is Part XXVII of the Giles Family Series.

Sister, Sister - Chapter One

Fic: Fascination (Drabbles)

2009-07-11T17:19:12Z

Title: Fascination
Author: Wyvernwolf
Rating: G
Characters/Pairing: Buffy, Giles with impressions of Buffy/Giles
Summary: A pair of drabbles from the viewpoint of Buffy and Giles.
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction and I claim no ownership of the Buffyverse.
Wordcount: 100 each

( Fascination )

Fic (and art - not mine): The Monster Inside

2009-07-06T10:22:59Z

Title: The Monster Inside
Author: Froxyn
Rating: FRM
Pairing: Buffy/Giles
Timeline: S6, AU. Giles never left.
Synopsis: After Willow loses Tara, she seeks revenge. Giles and the others try to stop her before she’s completely lost. But will there be a price to pay for their efforts?
Author’s Note: Special thanks to wyvernwolf, as usual.

I was lucky enough to receive two pieces of artwork for this fic.

Both are beautiful and wonderful...each with a different focus. Thank you katekat1010 and laurtew!

Click on either of the pics to go to the fic. :)

art by katekat1010

art by laurtew

Fic: Moving Forward

2009-07-05T07:20:07Z

Title: Moving Forward
Author: Froxyn
Rating: FRAO
Pairing: Buffy/Giles
Timeline: Not long after Standing Still.
Synopsis: Buffy and Giles are moving ahead in their relationship…and they have Jell-O to thank for it. And Willow…
Author’s Note: I had a very nice email from PhoenixLady that said she wanted to see a follow up to Standing Still…concerning Buffy and Giles’ first time along with Xander’s reaction to the new aspect of their relationship. I hope you enjoy this, Julia. Special thanks to wyvernwolf for being such a wonderful friend…and a tremendous beta. This was posted as my second offering for summer_of_giles 2009.

Moving Forward

Fic: You Choose part 117

2009-06-21T04:34:26Z

The next installment of You Choose has been posted. Please read and vote for how you want the next chapter to go!

You Choose 117

Fic: The Fifth of Five (5/5)

2009-06-19T09:48:43Z

Buffy does a bit of explaining.

This chapter is rated FRAO.

The Fifth of Five - Chapter Five

Fic: The Fifth of Five (4/5)

2009-06-18T09:31:54Z

A frustrated Buffy dredges up the past...

This chapter is rated FRAO (light).

The Fifth of Five - Chapter Four

Fic: The Fifth of Five (3/5)

2009-06-17T07:56:52Z

The younger Gileses are introduced to their baby brother.

This chapter is rated FRT.

The Fifth of Five - Chapter Three

Fic: The Fifth of Five (2/5)

2009-06-16T09:11:50Z

Discussions and doctors.

This chapter is rated FRT.

The Fifth of Five - Chapter Two

Fic: The Fifth of Five (1/5)

2009-06-15T07:42:08Z

Title: The Fifth of Five
Author: Froxyn
Rating: FRAO overall/This chapter FRM
Pairing: Buffy/Giles
Timeline: #26 in the Giles Family Series. Four weeks after A Week in the Life…
Synopsis: Declan makes his arrival.

The Fifth of Five - Chapter One

Fic: Hidden Truths (14/14)

2009-06-12T19:45:50Z

The final chapter.

And it's rated FRAO.

Hidden Truths - Chapter Fourteen

Fic: Hidden Truths (13/14)

2009-06-11T19:17:54Z

Reunions and names.

This chapter is rated FRT.

Hidden Truths - Chapter Thirteen

Fic: Hidden Truths (12/14)

2009-06-10T19:38:47Z

Buffy and Giles have some alone time. Dawn heads into the city to meet up with Xander.

This chapter is rated FRAO.

Hidden Truths - Chapter Twelve

Fic: Hidden Truths (11/14)

2009-06-09T19:31:47Z

Buffy and Dawn accompany Giles back to London.

This chapter is rated FRT.

Hidden Truths - Chapter Eleven

Fic: Hidden Truths (10/14)

2009-06-08T19:20:12Z

Buffy and Dawn talk. Dinner. Then, later...

This chapter is rated FRAO.

Hidden Truths - Chapter Ten

Fic: Hidden Truths (9/14)

2009-06-07T21:02:02Z

Buffy and Giles tell Dawn about the baby.

This chapter is rated FRAO.

Hidden Truths - Chapter Nine

Fic: Hidden Truths (8/14)

2009-06-06T20:26:27Z

Buffy has a truth to tell as well.

This chapter is rated FRAO.

Hidden Truths - Chapter Eight

Fic: Hidden Truths (7/14)

2009-06-05T19:23:10Z

Some truths can't hide forever.

This chapter is rated FRT.

Hidden Truths - Chapter Seven

Fic: Torjada

2009-06-05T10:30:26Z

Title: Torjada
Author: Froxyn
Rating: FRAO
Pairing: Buffy/Giles
Timeline: Directly after the end of Believe. If you haven’t read that one, this one’s probably not going to make much sense.
Synopsis: Buffy and Giles face the demon that she’s been having prophetic death dreams about.
Author’s Note: Special thanks to wyvernwolf as per usual! This was posted for summer_of_giles.

Torjada

Fic: Touch

2009-06-05T10:09:48Z

Title: Touch
Author: Froxyn
Rating: FRAO
Pairing: Buffy/Giles
Timeline: S5’ish, AU.
Synopsis: Buffy has a problem…that’s not really a problem.
Warnings: Bondage, sex toys – if that bothers you, please don’t read.
Author’s Note: This is in response to a Bunny given to me by freakandwack. Special thanks to laurtew for doing a wonderful beta job on this one! This was posted for summer_of_giles.

Touch

Fic: Hidden Truths (6/14)

2009-06-04T19:58:23Z

Giles heads to Rome.

This chapter is rated FRT.

Hidden Truths - Chapter Six