HOW TO KILL YOURSELF

Chapters 30 - 40 (The final ten) will be MEMBERS ONLY. All those who request membership from 10/3 and on will be moderated, but no one's request to join will be denied. I just would like to monitor who is joining, is all.

IF you were watching before, and all of a sudden you can't see the new chapters, it may be because you are only watching the community and you haven't actually JOINED it yet. you have to join by clicking the link, "click HERE to join the community" at the top of the communities info page. that's it. then you can see it again.

thanks.

EDIT
click here to join

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CHAPTER 29: RETAIL HELL

[Sep. 28th, 2004|01:07 am]

( Maybe that’s what she’s doing now. She followed the road of feminism and got pissed when she realized how empty corporate greed and mindless careerism was. It’s not like men were hiding that fact. They went off and divorced their wives and dated girls in their late teens. They bought sports cars and dyed their hair when they realized that half of their life had passed and they had done NOTHING worthwhile. Maybe fellating young men on the internet is the new female mid-life crisis. )

I haven't proofread this completely. If you find something, please let me know.

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a better banner

[Sep. 13th, 2004|03:34 am]

And here is the code for you to copy/paste and help me promote:
<a href="http://www.livejournal.com/community/alien_suicide/"><img src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v164/jamintron/Misc/5989dc71.gif"></a>

CHAPTER 28: JUST ANOTHER SILLY CUNT PART 2

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[Aug. 29th, 2004|09:22 pm]

( It was so cold that leaving the car brought a sense of disorientation and split-second fright that one might encounter if they were to wake up underwater at not know which direction the surface is. Of course, I’m used to this feeling. I feel it every time I wake up. )

CHAPTER 27: JUST ANOTHER SILLY CUNT, PART 1

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[Aug. 26th, 2004|05:37 pm]

( Yes, she is quite the psycho bitch. She has fit in very well with us. )

CHAPTER 26: TRANSGENDER DRAMA QUEENS

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[Aug. 13th, 2004|06:57 am]

( If you tell a drama queen that you have cancer, she’ll turn into her problem. She knows so many people who have suffered with cancer and why-oh-why is she a cancer magnet? If she’s a smart one, she wouldn’t say that to you, or even to your close friends, but to everyone she can she’ll turn your trauma into her source for attention )

CHAPTER 25: TECHNO HEARTBEAT

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[Aug. 1st, 2004|01:58 am]

( Wheels of meat just whirl into my eyes. It hypnotizes me and I grow hungrier and hungrier. I am carnivorous. I want this blood. I want this meat. I become a vampire, hunting people in the stark night of cyberspace. )

CHAPTER 24: DARK WATER PERCEPTIONS

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[Jul. 30th, 2004|12:04 am]

( All of that power and radiance of atoms being split, and a couple of girls swimming in dark water see the clouds of the aftermath and think it’s pretty. Maybe it isn’t the clouds that are beautiful, maybe it’s the girls. )

CHAPTER 23: THE RIDE HOME

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[Jul. 21st, 2004|10:48 pm]

( Can you feel the walls closing in? Can you feel the pressure drop? Has your heart stopped? Do you know that luck has run out? )

CHAPTER 22: OUT COME THE WORMS

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[Jul. 19th, 2004|10:18 pm]

( Why can’t everything be as simple as this solitary moment? This moment of realization when the faces and motions and thoughts and vibrations of the world can be ingested in one singular form… and accepted… It’s not trumped by some ego that says that this moment is great or important or makes you special for having it. Everything simply is. And where I fall in the great game- my life, my death, and everything in between- is neither significant nor insignificant… it simply is. )

CHAPTER 21: PERPETUAL PANIC

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[Jun. 29th, 2004|01:55 am]

( There is a fear of loneliness buried so deep in my mind that my actions are almost involuntary. If my pupils dilate one more millimeter, I will be in a full blown panic. I think I’m more afraid of being alone than anything else in this world. )

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CHAPTER 20: SUTURE

[Jun. 18th, 2004|07:30 pm]

( The American Lie… You can be anything you want to be. You can do anything you want to do. The answer to any social situation is: Just Be Yourself. All men are created equal. Just Do it. Drugs are not the answer. We are one. Music Television. Women are not treated as second class citizens. Feed Your Craving. We’re not brainwashing you. Have a coke and a smile. You’ve got a friend in Pennsylvania. I wouldn’t lie to you. Have it your way. You’re in good hands. Lose 7 lbs in 7 days. I love you. Life cruises by with regular commercial breaks to mark the time. Every once in a while the sun comes up and goes down. There’s nothing I can do to stop it. )

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CHAPTER 19: ANTI - I

[Jun. 18th, 2004|12:43 am]

( Just say no? Fuck you, Nancy. Give me my mood stabilizers. Then I can be a good little girl… a smile on my face and dead to the world… a cock in my mouth and a Coke in my hand. )

CHAPTER 18: A CAT IN THE BRAIN

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[Jun. 17th, 2004|11:59 pm]

( Trying to love yourself the way the world tells you to… just doesn’t work. In fact, ‘try to love yourself’ is, in itself, misdirection. Most people who try to love themselves end up selfish and unfulfilled, and hating themselves instead. Don’t try to love yourself, just try to feel love. )

CHAPTER 17: A MELODRAMATIC DISTORTION OF REALITY IN HANOVER, PA

[Jun. 16th, 2004|10:53 pm]

( Your melodramatic distortion of reality is not a mood disorder. You’re just a bitch, that’s all. )

CHAPTER 16: PHUCK PHISH

[Jun. 16th, 2004|09:09 pm]

( It was never about love to begin with. It was always about power. I never gained the edge I thought I had when I broke up with him. He lost nothing. All he wants is to exert force on me. He did that before we broke up, and he still gets to do it. )

CHAPTER 15: REMEMBERING A HALLUCINATION OR HALLUCINATING A MEMORY?

[Jun. 9th, 2004|07:16 pm]

( Sometimes I feel like my dreams are a memory from the future, like I’ve flash forwarded to my death bed and I’m having a hallucination based on the memories of my life. )

CHAPTER 14: SOMETHING YOU BOYS WILL NEVER FIGURE OUT

[Jun. 9th, 2004|12:08 pm]

( I can tell you something about love. It’s convenient. It’s a great weapon when you want someone to feel worse than you do. All you have to do is take it away. )

CHAPTER 13: SNICKER SNACK

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[Jun. 8th, 2004|05:42 pm]

( A sickly yellowish green mist pours through the black trees and clouds and surrounds the hanging bodies. So that is the color of suicide, I think to myself. )

CHAPTER 12: THE TRUTH ABOUT MONSTERS

[Jun. 8th, 2004|02:39 pm]

( The monsters that exist today aren’t sleeping under beds or hiding in closets- they are mothers, fathers, uncles, neighbors, family, strangers… Selfish people, greedy workaholics, child molesters, alcoholic wife and child beaters… these are our monsters. We become our abusers. We inflict our own trauma. We become our monster... The true torture is that I may become my mother. )