Current mood:

confused

Dear Advice,

The other day, my cousin tried to kill my boyfriend. I'm not joking -- my cousin is seriously psychotic, and he took a sawed-off shotgun and tried to shoot my boyfriend. In the head. Luckily, he was on speed, so he missed, so my boyfriend was able to wrestle the gun away from him, breaking his leg instead. So, Cuz went to Juvie and came out "reformed." (I'm 16, by the way). I've been visiting my boyfriend Lirick every day now. And every day now, my cousin's been harassing me sexually and threatening to finish the job. Part of me is really disgusted -- but... part of me kinda isn't... it's really messed up, I know, but the thing is, my cuz is really hot. He apologized for trying to end Lirick's life so savagely, but it seemed a little fake. And then he admitted that he was lying, and he came onto me. I was so off-balance that I couldn't resist him. I should mention now that I haven't had sex with my boyfriend yet. But now I've given my virginity to my cousin. It wasn't really my fault... I was just really horny, and Lirick couldn't give it to me when he's lying in bed with a broken leg. It's not like I don't love my boyfriend, it's more like I'm strangely attracted to my cousin, too. Oh great, I sound like a polyamorous, incestuous freak... I don't really want to stop what I'm doing with my cousin, but I don't want to lose Lirick, either, because I LOVE Lirick, while what I have with my cuz is pure sex. With monogamy kicking in, I feel like I have to choose... do I? Should I tell Lirick? (Please don't respond if you're just going to tell me that what I have with my cousin is sick and twisted, I KNOW it is, but I want it anyway.) Please respond quickly. And also, um, my ass kind of still hurts and I was wondering how long it would take before the pain went away.

Thanks,
Terrence