Alice's blue eyes scanned the casket. It was a lovely casket, really. Marecia had done a marvelous job of taking care of things.

Alice hugged herself. The room was very cold. The lights were dim, and Alice assumed that under normal circumstances, she would have been frightened to be standing in that room, just her and Em. Without realizing she was doing so, she suddenly reached out and gently laid her hand on top of the cherry-colored casket. She wanted to be able to reach out to Em.

"I'm sorry," she said softly, and then, slowly dragging her hand away, she turned around. She let out a gasp as she made out a figure of a person standing in the entry way.

Of course, as soon as the initial shock passed, she recognized the form to be Robin, his dim blue eyes staring at her, his face appearing as cold as the room felt. Alice hugged herself again, as goosebumps popped onto her bare arms.

"Robin," she said softly. "I-I thought you had left."

"I'm about to," Robin said slowly, and he took a step closer to Alice, closer to the only light. "I... I came to say goodbye."

Alice took in a breath. He had come to say goodbye to Em. Not to her.

"I'm sorry I didn't believe you," Alice said softly, as she moved aside to make room for Robin to pass her.

Robin didn't say anything. He walked up to the casket, and slowly lifted the lid, shocking Alice, who had assumed it to be locked.

"I don't want you to believe me," Robin said then, and he closed the lid. "That's not Em in there. Em never existed."

"Robin..." Alice said softly, slowly. She stopped, and shook her head. "Robin, that's Emmy. Your friend Emmy."

"A mistake," Robin simply said, and with that, he brushed past her, and out the door.

“I’m afraid to see him,” I whispered very softly. “I’m so frightened.”
Krista looked at the ground and said, “Just remember… it could all be in your head.”
I closed my eyes. She still didn’t believe me.
I managed to take a shaky breath. “Krista, we’ve been best friends for as long as I can remember. You know me. And you know I could never dream something like this up. He’s here, somewhere. I just know it.”
Krista looked up at me, and I was shocked to see tears in her blue eyes.
“Sammy, he’s dead,” she whispered softly. “You saw his grave. And even though you don’t remember, you went to his funeral. You were there. At one time, you knew he was dead.”
“Then why don’t I anymore?”

RULES:
Write what your character (any character, not just the main) would do in response to the situation presented in the above post. If the situation would not be possible in your story, imagine if. At the end of your post, present a new situation.

SITUATION#1: Your character walks into a rave. Strobe lights are flashing, bodies pressing close together, people yelling, music pounding.

Cain: Chances are, if Cain is at a rave, it's because he's somehow in charge of it. He's observing the people involved, and probably making a ton of money, be it from sales of water or other substances. He's interested in how people react to this kind of environment.

Ava: Ava is new to the environment, but curious as well. She approaches with cauton and is utterly shocked when people tried to grind with her.

Lester: Lester is appalled. Plain and simple. He's going to drag Ava out whether or not she wants to leave and stomp off like he owns the place.

SITUATION #2: Your character finds a wallet in the street with $100 in it, along with the ID of the owner...

Cain: Pockets the cash. As for the ID and the wallet... well, that's what the trash is for.

Ava: Ava would probably recognize the owner from the picture, or at least think she does. She'd manage to convince Cain and Lester to go on a whole voyage to track down the owner, and not because she wants to give the money back, but because she knows the person. Money means little to her compared to a person she knows.

Lester: Surprisingly, Lester acts similarly to Cain on this one. The only difference is that Lester keeps the wallet and the ID, and promises himself that if he ever stumbles upon the owner, he'll pay back the $100.

SITUATION #3: Your character tries to hail a taxi, but someone jumps in front of him and gets inside...

Cain: Cain grabs the guy by the back of his collar and shoves him backwards. "Can't you see I was here first?!"

Ava: Ava says nothing. She just watches as the person gets into the taxi and drives away.

Lester: Lester opens his mouth to say something, but nothing comes out. The guy looks at him, but Lester just looks back. Then, Lester even shuts the door for him, but crosses his arms and glares as the taxi leaves his sight.

SITUATION #4: Your character tries to go into the store, but is flagged down by someone taking donations for a charity. They...?

Cain: "Yeah, yeah, yeah..." reaches into his pocket, pulls out some coins, and shoves them into the person's hand, before marching off.

Ava: Apologizes over and over and over...and over about not having any cash to donate. Lester finally drags her away.

Lester: "Sorry, ma'am, but I have no cash on me" and without even looking at the person he's addressing, walks away.

SITUATION #5: Your character has someone holding a gun to his head and no clue who it is that's holding the gun let alone why they would do so. What do they do?

Cain: Cain actually panics momentarily while his head goes crazy searching for a way out of this mess. He'd finally BS some crap to try to figure out who it is, and look for his opportunity to grab his captor's hand and the gun.

Ava: She'd smile and say "Please, go ahead."

Lester: Lester would be silent, and pray. And wait.

SITUATION #6: your character wakes up on a life raft in the middle of an ocean and has no idea how they got there. what do they do?

Cain: Freeeeeeeeaaaaaaak out. And probably end up drowning in the process.

Ava: Ava would analyze the situation and figure out how she got there, why she's there, and the like, before simply laying on her back and staring at the beautiful blue sky.

Lester: Lester would look for an island or the like, all while remaining rational and calm.

SITUATION #7: Your Character can't get any sleep because the people next door are having a party... what do they do?

Cain: Cain would march right over the neighbors, and unplug CD players and whatnot, or steal the band's mic and shout at his neighbors to shut-up. Chances are though, he's the one having the party.

Ava: Ava would simply put a pillow over her head and do the best she can to go to bed.

Lester: Lester would groan, roll over, pick up the phone, and call the cops. There, problem solved.

SITUATION #8: Your character is presented with the opprotunity to travel through time. Where and when would your character go?

Cain: Cain would go to the 1990s or the first decade in the 2000's and live the present-day life... of a hockey player.

Ava: Ava would go back to the days just before the French Revolution and live life in the French court--the way she was meant to live life.

Lester: Lester would probably want to go back to something he knows, and would end up in WWI or WWII as a foot soldier.

SITUATION #9: Your character enters a bar. Do they wait for someone to notice them, go out an check someone out, or are they there for a completely different reason?

Cain: Cain isn't looking, but if someone presented themselves, he'd go ahead and indulge.

Ava: Ava would sit in the corner by herself, silent and half-hoping that no one would notice her.

Lester: Lester would be at the bar, talking to the bartender, and not looking at all.

SITUATION #10: If your character found a watch that could tell them the exact time and date of their death, what would they do with it? Throw it away instantly, keep it, or look up their date and time?

Cain: Cain would become obsessed with it. He would look at it always, and know the exact countdown of seconds, minutes, and hours he had until the time on that watch. He would prepare in advance and do incredibly crazy things before his death came.

Ava: Ava would wear it like an accessory and think nothing of it. Whenever anyone mentioned it, she'd just smile blankly and say "Isn't it a pretty watch?"

Lester: Lester wouldn't believe it, and he'd throw it away.

---

ANALYSIS:

Cain:
+ rash
+ in-charge
+ unable to think things through

Ava:
+ nice
+ simple
+ ...brain-dead

Lester:
+ rational
+ to-the-point
+ loyal

The more I think about this story, and the more I come up with it, the more messed up it gets. I think it has to do with the fact that I desperately want it to be different than my other two otherwise similar ideas, and because I've known since the very beginning that the main character--Cain--is extremely messed up.

And now, the more I think about it, the more I think that Ava, the main girl character, is also going to be extremely messed up. But not like Cain--Cain has psychological problems. Ava, on the other hand, has something wrong with her that messes with her brain. I'm thinking it'll be from some future chemical kind of like radiation from atomic bombs. But the main character doesn't know about this, although Lester does.

Anyway, Ava is going to hallucinate because of the chemical mess in her brain, thanks to an after-effect from a bombing near her hometown when she was younger. And she hallucinates very strange things.

So as far as POVs go, I'm pretty sure I'm going to go ahead and switch, kind of like Stephenie Meyer did in Breaking Dawn. I personally think the decision of Stephenie Meyer to switch POVs was a little ridiculous, but I can completely understand. Sometimes, the story would just go better and make more sense (ha, or in my case, make less sense) if the POV switches.

For the most part, I want there to be like three "Cain" chapters, and then a random "Ava" chapter, and then three more "Cain" chapters followed by another "Ava" chapter. A couple Cain, one Ava kind of thing, but with no specific pattern. And Ava's chapters are going to start out fairly normal, and then just get weird. And many of them will be flashbacks/hallucinations/reality. You won't know really until the end.

And Ava will die. I'm not sure if she will die from something related to the chemicals in her system or if she'll die some other way.

This novel is going to be so weird and hard to lay out, and at the same time, I can't help but think about how creepy it is. It is such a creepy story that it's not even funny. It really is frightening. I get chills when I think about how creepy it is.

I think the frightening thing is how much trust Cain puts into Ava. Throughout the novel, it seems as if it's Ava that's actually putting all of her trust into Cain, but in reality... *shivers*... it's definitely creepy that Cain trusts Ava, because...

she's not all there.

Heck, she's not there at all. And you think she is. You think she's Cain's dream girl and that it's adorable that she falls in love with him at first sight and that the two of them are meant to be together and all that jazz.

But she's NOT. ALL. THERE.

And she constantly hallucinates about dying. There's going to be one scene in particular... I'm thinking about giving Ava control of narrating two chapters. And they are going to be messed. up. This is when the readers will realize that there's something very weird going on.

Also, there's an underlying theme of a teddy bear whenever Ava talks. It's Ava's belief that her father left her when she was a young girl, after telling her he was going to give her a gift, and leaving her with a giant teddy bear. The "teddy bear", however, is actually nothing more than an allusion to the bomb. Ava looks at the teddy bear as what took her father's place, being that the bear came (her present from him) and he left. In reality, the big teddy bear is actually the bomb. The bomb came and her dad left. And, like the "teddy bear", the bomb stayed with Ava, infiltrating her brain and slowly killing her.

When Ava "dies", she hallucinates that Cain is going to be the one to kill her. She has this feeling that Cain is going to be the one to kill her, and she voices this earlier on in the novel. And toward the end, when her brain basically shuts down, she hallucinates that she and Cain are standing in a field, and that he is going to kill her. He puts his hand over her eyes and is going to shoot her.

But when the gunshot echoed into the air, I felt nothing but the pressure of Cain's hand lift off of my face. My eyes were still closed, but I opened them quickly, confusion making its way to the top of my brain. Laying there in front of me, with his head gushing blood and the pistol at his side, was Cain. He hadn't killed me. He had killed himself.

I felt a blood-curling scream erupt from my lungs, and the next thing I knew, I was toppling over backwards. My eyes closed again, and I knew without a doubt that they would never open again.

It's kind of frustrating starting a new novel. There's so much that has to be planned out before even starting.

You've got to determine the POV. First, second, or third. That one is so hard for me.

And then there's names. Names of the characters, and the title of the story.

Location. Place, setting... past, future, present.

And I keep having so many scenes flashing through my mind for this story. I'm pretty sure it's going to take place in the future. And as much as I hate to do it, I think I'm going to have it take place in Canada. The Eastern side of Canada, of course. But I don't like to do that, because I've never been there before. But since this is basically made up, I'm assuming it won't overly matter. I want my main character to be fluent in French and English.

And I'm pretty sure I want the U.S. to be a wasteland. Nothing left but ruins from an atomic bomb or something. And I want technology all but gone.

Anyway, I need to stop rambling and figure things out...

I swear I am meant to write a story about a revolution or a war or something, because for the second time, I've had a very detailed dream about two sides of a war.

But this story is interesting, because the main character has problems: he likes to kill people. He likes to walk right up to someone, put his gun right up to his target's head, and fire. He gets a complete and utter thrill from it--from literally shooting someone in the back of the head.

It's war though, so it's not like he's a psycho. But I think it's interesting. And yet, he's humane. When a dying man begs him not to shoot his "brother", the main character complies, and doesn't kill the "boy". The boy/brother ends up actually being the dying man's sister, disguised as a boy to fight in the war. And, maybe because she is a girl, the main character lets her go.

Or maybe it's because he falls in love with her at first sight. I'm not sure if I believe in that anymore, and I definitely have a hard time believing that guys fall in love at first sight... hmm... maybe the girl falls in love with him at first sight? Well, whatever, the guy and the girl obviously fall in love.

And there's another guy, too. Maybe he'll be there when the main character originally corners them. (Oh, and for the record, the main character doesn't kill the girl's brother. He was already injured, and the main character chases them into an alleyway.)

But anyway, before I continue, how about names? :)?

I'm thinking for now, it could be cool to name the boy Cain. I've always wanted to use that name, and I think for the first time, I can actually use it! So for now, it's going to be Cain. :)

As for the girl... her name's going to be Ava. After a cute little girl I taught in tennis lessons. Lolz.

The other guy's name is... well, I like the name Locke. But I also like the name Lester for him for some reason. I think it was Lester in the dream, honestly. So I'm thinking Lester.

Anyway, so Cain (very subject to change) and Ava will hook up, and it's going to become apparent that Lester has a thing for Ava too. Oh, and that's ignoring the fact that Cain has a fiance...

But yeah, that's all I'm going to write on this write now... :)

Currently, I'll refer to it as Hangin' With The Boys. :)

Basically, it's about a girl named Ronnie, who has just graduated from high school. Ronnie has two best friends, but she only hangs out with them in the summer.

They're the two guys on either side of her house: Cullen and OG (stands for "other guy" but I'm starting to actually like it for his name. XD;;).

Anyway, Cullen is the oldest, and he has just finished his first year of college and is back home for the summer. Ronnie and OG are ecstatic to be able to spend the summer w/ him, just like all the years before, but they're worried that he will have changed.

At first, things are totally normal, and just like any summer before.

The problem, though, is that Ronnie can't help but feel like things have changed, starting with feelings that she realizes she has for Cullen. She realized it before he returned: he has been her best friend forever, despite the fact that they didn't really hang out in school. They used to walk to school together and hold hands--you know, that kind of friendship. Every summer, they spent together.

OG moved just two years ago, so he's the new one to the group. I want him to have a dorky name (XD, like OG) because Cullen gives him crap about his "potential name of a dork." Cullen also gives Ronnie crap about hanging out w/ all guys all summer and calls her "Ronald".

The three of them live on a channel (of a lake), and are basically the only kids their age. Every other "kid" is either way older (Like Cullen's older brother) or way younger, like OG's little sister. Ronnie has a younger brother that is OG's sister's age... maybe. (XD, possible sequel?! HAHA)

Everyone knows the kids, so everyone knows that Ronnie and Cullen are like inseperable best friends, and that OG is their third member of their little gang. The three mostly mind their own business and just have fun, which incudes jetski races, wakeboarding, and playing inline hockey. They basically lounge around and just have fun.

Anyway, Ronnie decides to hide her feelings for Cullen, to keep things normal, but finds herself getting annoyed that Cullen and OG just think of her as "one of the guys". I'll have a scene where the three are out on jetskis, just idling and doing nothing, and talking about how "Ronald" doesn't wear makeup or anything. Then, two girls will come by, and OG & Cullen will proceed to check them out, while Ronnie feels some jealousy.

OG's dad meanwhile tells him that if he's going to be out and about all summer, he needs to get a job. (these kids are all rich) So, OG spends most of his daytimes working partime at Old Man Wally's boat shop, which leaves Cullen and Ronnie to themselves.

There are some jerks Cullen's age that live across the lake, in another channel, who also stir up some problems, and somewhere before the halfway mark of the novel, Cullen pretty much falls in love w/ one of the jerk's younger sisters, who is Ronnie's age, and who Ronnie knows from school and dislikes.

Upset and jealous, Ronnie goes a little overboard on complaining about her friend's sudden infatuation w/ girls, and OG kind of figures out that Ronnie has feelings for Cullen. Ronnie denies this, of course.

OG then tells Ronnie that he likes her, which surprises Ronnie, and Ronnie points out that if she and OG started dating, it would be awkward for Cullen, and if they broke up, it could potentially pull their whole group apart. OG says "Exaclty" and says that he was just kidding about liking Ronnie, but wanted to make sure that she understood the dangers in having feelings for her best friend.

...Ronnie doesn't know if this is the truth or not, and wonders if OG really likes her. To be honest, I'm not sure if he does or not. It depends on if I'm in the mood for a love quadrangle or not. Not to mention that it kind of ruins the point of the novel a little bit...

Cullen starts to date the girl, which basically leaves Ronnie to her own, since OG is working and stuff.

And so, Ronnie decides she has to become girlier if she's ever going to be a serious contendor for Cullen's feelings.

...And yeah, I don't know what happens after that.

Cullen of course sees the new Ronnie, maybe OG helps hook them up... who knows. The possibilities are almost endless. :)

But yeah, that's what I've got so far! :D

HAPPY GACKT'S B-DAY EVERYBODY!

I want to write fated the novel and it's going to be the most uberly tragic thing I have ever written in my life. :3 x 1,000,000.

I spent an entire 3.5 hours at work thinking about it. But right now, I can't decide the POV (my usual problem...).

The main character is also the only character that I don't have a name for. v_v I want a simple, one syllable name that starts with the letter C. So my first thought was Cain. But then I started to like the sound of Kael, but I don't want to spell it like that. But I don't like the name Kael unless it's spelled K-A-E-L. :( And Cael wouldn't work. I really, really, really want his name to start with a C.

Cade is kind of cute.

I love the name Channing (for many reasons. XD) but it's too long...

Chase is kind of cool.

Cullen for a first name is actually really sweet. (Um, yeah, I read Twilight and I'm totally thinking Edward Cullen right now. But it's even cooler as a first name! BUT, too many syllables...

You know, Cade is cute. I kind of like it. I'm tied between Cain and Cade.

...And I still like Kael. :(

Clay would be kind of cool too. I knew a kid named Clay once...

See, the thing about the name "Cain" is that I kind of want to tuck that away for another [not yet born] character. I love the whole "world's first murderer" connotation is has. You know, all that biblical reference stuff. Cade might cut it. But I don't like the way it looks...

Caid. No. Caed. No. Cade. I don't know, it looks unpleasant.

Clay is okay, but... Eh...

Hahaha, I could name him Cash. My brother and I used to play a game about brothers all named with -ash names. Cash was the older brother, and he was rich and drove a motorcycle. Haha! I wish I could remember what character I usually played... I know there was an Ash and a Dash. Ash might have been me, and I know Dash was fast... /randomness.

I've GOT IT.

Chael

But how do you pronoucne it? It's short for Michael, so do you pronounce it like MICHAEL? Almost like Cole?

I don't care. That's the name of my main character! Chael! :Dv

...This writing-notes stuff really works! :D

It's cute! :)

Now I just have to figure POV stuff out. Basically, I'm thinking about having a character tell the story, like she's telling it to Chael's son. But I don't know if that'll work, 'cause it's totally about Chael, and most of the story is about things that Chael does in secret. So how this character would know about it is beyond me. So that probably won't fly. :/

Anyway though, I want to start outlining soon! :D

I don't know why, but I like to jump to the extremes of things. For example, I don't like to swear. I think I've said the 'd-word' once. I don't think I've ever said the 's-word' or the 'b-word' or even the 'a-word'! I like to jump straight to that 'f-word'. The big ol' f-bomb. I don't know why, I don't know how, but I do. If something makes me really upset, like when I first called him, that word comes right out of my mouth.

It's the same with dating. I skip over the whole dating step in my mind, and I think "Hmm... could I marry this guy?" (And, just for the record, the answer to that question is usually the big "Um... no.") Therefore, I've never had a boyfriend.

But now that I've hugged him, now that I've felt my heart flutter like a trapped bug inside of my body, I know I could marry him.

And so, I skip straight to this question: Should I have children?

Seriously, there is something wrong with me! I skip ahead like five steps! I haven't even kissed him, and it doesn't matter, since he's miles and miles away from me! I may never ever ever see him again! It was just a simple, innocent hug. So why in the world am I thinking about having children with him? It's just wrong! Wrong, wrong, wrong! Horrendously wrong.

I have to stop thinking into that hug too much...

"Don't you know I love you?" my voice came out loudly, but weakly.

He turned around and looked at me, his eyes wide, unblinking. "How can that be?" he questioned. "You don't even know me."

"I don't need to know you," I said. "I know. I know I'm in love with you."

He gave me the look I had seen him give me many times. He furrowed his eyebrows and lifted the left side of him mouth, making an expression that was a mixture of disgust, shock, and confusion, but mostly it was of disgust.

I knew how to interpret that look, too. He wasn't disgusted with me. That I could see in his clear eyes. It was rather that he didn't know how to respond, and that was the look that he had trained his body to respond with.

...

I had more and stuff, but I kind of lost it...

I want to write a fantasy novel. I caught a glimpse of the movie "Stardust", and I want to write a completely random novel that is total fantasy. :)

So the other day it was raining, and I thought about this:

We hadn't seen each other for months. When he was finally back, we agreed to meet in the park, a place we had met so many times before. It was raining, but that didn't stop us. We stood under a tree, which offered at least a little perfection, and with my hands in his, we kissed.

The kiss was soft and tender, the type that was completely impossible to describe, but one that had to just be felt, experienced. And at the time, I was ever so happy to be experiencing it.

As I stand underneath that tree now, however, my lips aren't on his. Instead, they're quivering. The rain isn't majestic like it was that day either. Instead, it's miserable.

I also am toying around w/ a story that takes place in London during the "An Ideal Husband" days. (XD, that's my current favorite piece of literature... although it's technically a drama. XD) It's about a girl named Brigid Hunt, whose father was Irish and whose mother was English. Her father died when she was young, and her mother has just died, so she's sent off to live with her aunt and uncle, who were unable to conceive children.

Her aunt and uncle (I'm thinking the aunt will be named Laura and the husband Harry. (Harry was Brigid's mother's brother) are surprisingly happy to have her. They're super nice people who are very respected in British society.

And then there's Sebastian Smith, the dandy who loves to cause havoc throughout town with his friends...

Well, I don't want to get too into it, but... :)

Nellie = Julie. Perfect.

I had always expected a classy, sophisticated, almost old-fashioned romance that consisted of evening dresses, live classical music, gorgeous nights out, Parisian trips... but I was learning quickly that reality was indeed different. There was nothing classy, nothing sophisticated about the party I was at. It was dark, grungy, and trashy, and reeked of alcohol.

My stomach twisted uncomfortably. It wasn't what I had been expecting.

My house was empty when I finally got back to school, which was fine with me. I threw my backpack onto the floor and grabbed my laptop, which was conveniently sitting right next to the corner that I threw my backpack into, and I went into the kitchen.

I set my laptop on the breakfast buffet counter, and flipped it open and pushed the power button. I then padded across the kitchen to the refrigerator, and pulled out a coke, despite the fact that I was sure it probably belonged to my younger brother. It didn’t matter though, since he was on a band trip.

--

Something I'd written. Basically Leila goes to kitchen // her mom comes home // Leila is sitting there w/ dreamy look on her face // Mom asks why // Leila tells her // Mom says "Oh, doesn't he play for that junior hockey team? // there, now Leila knows who Blaise Adams is. <3

--

But I don't know if I'm going to use that or not yet... I think I'll skip it for now. She might stumble upon "who he is" in a different way.

I'm in love with my character, Blaise Adams, in my newest novel, the one that I'm currently working on.

The inspiration for Blaise Adams, as told by Utada Hikaru in her song "Beautiful World". (<--My current favorite song, in case you were wondering. :p)

It’s only love…
It’s only love…

If I could only have one desire fulfilled,
I would wish to be sleeping by your side, wherever that may be
In this beautiful world.
I gaze at your determined figure -
What a beautiful boy.
Yet, you are unable to see your own beauty.

It’s only love...

Eating, sleeping and breathing comics,*
I hated myself in that passing dream filled with those images.

I know that I don’t know what I want,
Nonetheless, I want it... As tepid tears stream down my cheeks.

I really have nothing I want to say to you,
But I still want to see you one more time.
The things that I want to say – I cannot say.
Perhaps I am a coward,
But it’s alright.

If I were to have only one wish fulfilled,
It would be to lie sleeping by your side, it doesn’t matter where that is
In this beautiful world.
I keep gazing at your determined figure -
What a beautiful boy.
Yet, you still can’t see the beauty within you.

It’s only love...

Trying my hand at almost anything,
It all seems at a loss... Perhaps besides gaining some experience.

I don’t see the need for newspapers,
The things that are most important to people are not even in there.
Have you been taking care of yourself recently?
So long as you are well,
I’ll be fine.

If I don’t get to see you even when my world disappears,
As long as I am resting beside you, any place is bearable
In this beautiful world.
In the midst of these fleeting days
There stands a beautiful boy.
My ever-shifting moods, nothing can be done to help them.

If I could only have one wish fulfilled,
It would be to be there lying by your side.

Beautiful world... Beautiful boy...
Beautiful world... Beautiful boy...
Beautiful world... Beautiful boy...

*Clears throat*

I love Leila Pillings' (my main character. :) description of Blaise Adams to death. If I had to pull out a segment of a novel that I really liked, this would be one of the sections I would deeply consider pulling out:

...I closed my eyes, and attempted to envision Blaise Adams’ perfect features into my mind. I didn’t want to forget what he looked like.

I started at the top: his hair. His hair was somewhat shaggy, and had a little natural curl right at his forehead and by his ears. My eyes immediately opened. I’d seen that cut before, and something told me that it had a name, and that it was affiliated with something. But what? I shook my head, and decided that I’d worry about it later. Again, I closed my eyes.

His hair color was honey-blonde, and perhaps in the right lighting, it might have a little bit of redness to it. His eyes were brown and warm, and large and round, and very innocent, like a puppy dog’s or a teddy bear’s or a little child’s. His nose was straight and firm, and literally of the perfect length—not too long, and not too small. His mouth was perhaps his only flaw, in the fact that it was a little disproportionate. Even so, it wasn’t odd, necessarily.

He was so tall, too. I was sure he was at least an inch over six feet, if not more. He was thin, too, I recalled, but strong. Oh so strong.

Blaise Adams is perfection in the eyes of our protagonist, but it can be assumed early on that our protagonist isn't exactly the most trustworthy character. She is a dreamer, and completely unable to fathom reality.

Blaise Adams isn't gorgeous, something that will be made clear sometime in the novel. (But not by Leila--oh no. She won't use the word 'gorgeous' or 'hot' or anything like that to explain him, but she will definitely never say that he "isn't gorgeous" because she is completely and utterly positive that he is perfect--she idealizes him from before she even meets him, after all.

Even so, Blaise Adams is entirely desirable. He isn't overly intelligent, and he is awfully clueless. His naiveness makes him cute though, and he is indeed nice and sweet. However, he also has a sassy side, something that he only shows once you get to know him. He's never had a girlfriend, and isn't exactly looking, despite the fact that many girls make it obvious that they'd love to be "the one".

As with the song "Beautiful World" though, Blaise Adams does have a very big flaw: His self-consciousness.

I keep gazing at your determined figure -
What a beautiful boy.
Yet, you still can’t see the beauty within you.

He's very determined and strong-willed, full of anticipation and dedication and hard-work. He's naively been around the block but still retains quite a bit of innocence. But he isn't very sure of himself, no matter how hard he tries or how hard he works. It's always "good luck" and he always feels he can do better. He worries about things not worth worrying about, but for the most part manages to keep a cool, outer shell.

Because of this self-doubt, Blaise manages to keep from getting a big head, and remains down-to-earth, but almost to a point that's below the normal level. He's thin, and part of it has to do with the fact that he doesn't eat much--he's never hungry.

In fact, part of the reason that he feels so repelled by Leila is because of the fact that she idealizes him and has made him higher on the pedestal than he feels he deserves to be. He's frightened by it, and doesn't know how to act around her. Leila, being the dreamer that she is, has self-doubt, but her confidence level is three times higher than Blaise's, despite the fact that she has no reason to be confident. She just naturally is, and she's an even better pretender at it than Blaise.

In short, she puts Blaise far too high up on her list, while Blaise himself puts himself far too low. A middle ground can't be formed, and this is part of the reason it doesn't work out.

Anyway, in conclusion, I know exactly how to write Blaise.

...

Gee, I wonder why that is? ;)

"What are you reading?"

His voice echoed through the room, and it felt as if it took hours to reach me. I froze immediately, and felt a wave of heat reach my cheeks. One word entered my mind: Busted.

I put the magazine down, and gave him a smile. He was standing in the doorway, with a very stern look plastered across his face. I knew without a doubt that I would not be getting a return smile from him.

"What is that?" he asked me, despite the fact that I already knew that he knew. Just the same, he walked over to me, and he bent down, and picked up the magazine. I just sat there, my smile now erased from my face, and my eyes on him, wanting to read his expression.

So I was reading a dirty magazine. What was the big deal? Girls my age read them all the time.

"Why are you reading this?" he questioned, his eyes on mine.

"Um..." I fought to come up with a good reason.

He knew too well, though. He always knew too well.

"Does this have to do with Blaise Adams?" he asked me, his voice almost soft, and surprisingly monotone.

"Y-Yes," I stammered. My first thought was to lie to him. I couldn't let him know that reading that dirty magazine was related to Blaise Adams! Of course, I couldn't lie. Bo knew me too well. At the same time though, a part of me was relieved. The truth came out much easier than a lie, after all.

Bo shook his head, his sandy curls brushing to the right, and then to the left.

"This isn't like you," he said, and with that, he dropped the magazine on the ground. The magazine landed loudly, for it was a thick magazine, loaded with advertisements for birth control and fragrances. He squinted at me, as if trying to figure something out, before repeating himself. "This isn't like you."

I swallowed loudly. I didn't need his sternness, his apparent fatherly-ness. I wanted to snap at him and tell him that I already had a father, and I didn't need his help, but I couldn't be harsh to him. Instead, I pleaded with him.

"Don't be harsh with me," I said, and although I'd vowed not to be harsh to him in return, my voice did come out in a rather snappy way.

"This just isn't like you," he said. He seemed to be in denial. He was still squinting at me, as if he couldn't figure something out. He looked confused, and a wrinkle in his forehead proved this.

My heart began to speed then, and I found myself having trouble breathing.

"It isn't like me," I said, softly, "because I'm not like him. Blaise Adams isn't like me!"

My newest project as of now.

...Not sure how it'll go though.

Here's the summary though:

Olivia/Brennan/Ellie/Leila/Karli Pillings is an indifferent, active girl who is blessed with a rather strange gift: she knows the name of the man that she's to end up with, a blessing that came to her in a dream on her eighth birthday. Now, nearly ten years later, she has met that guy, Blaise Adams. The problem? He doesn't seem the slightest bit interested in her.

So, girl meets guy. How they meet, I'm not sure yet. The girl feels an instant connection to the guy.

I want to work on this instead of going to class and tennis. :(

It doesn't mean he's taken. It just means that he's not currently available.

There's a difference between dreaming and hoping, as I've come to realize. I mean, I've always know that a difference exists, but I always thought it was a thin difference, and that the words could, and often did, blur together. Now though, I know that the difference is quite defined. A dream is something you want, but something that is impossible to get. A hope is something you want, something that is indeed obtainable, but something that will take a miracle to achieve.

I need a miracle to have him. And right now, watching him serenely kiss that girl, I don't believe in miracles.

I have to stop dreaming.

I know I've mentioned A Model Story a lot on and off, but I was reading a part I wrote a while ago, and it's just... kind of good.

I hate to admit it, but besides Robin, all I write is teen-fiction. Seriously. Splinter of Sadness isn't really all that teen-fictiony, and really neither is Victoria Plaza, but with all of my ideas and whatnot, they're mostly teen-fiction.

But I think A Model Story is really unique. I mean, really, it is.

Sadly, I think I need to rework the first one. And then I'm thinking about doing three. It'd be cool if it could be a series, but with the way I'm writing it... Hmm... I just don't think it would work out. But three would work out pretty good.

But I need outlines. Or something. You know, to organize my thoughts. Because there's a BIG love triangle. A big one.

And then there's also a murder story that gets cleaned up in the first one, but is then brought back in the third one.

And really, the main plot of it is Ami Hage finding love and happiness. Well, all of the characters need to find love and happiness, actually.

Since I've mostly written the first one, we're going to go on to Part II and Part III

( Plot Synopsis(es) )

I've been listening to a lot of OLIVIA's older works lately.

It's been fairly inspiring. But she's always seemed to speak of Alice's point of view for my Robin series. :)

+ if you only knew...
+ Space Halo

And when she's not speaking from Alice's point of view, she's speaking from my own...

+ Wish (Eng. Ver.)
+ Winter Sleep

:)