Title: Stand by me

Author: Kitekat1

Pairing: Matt Sanders/Brian Haner

Rating: R

Disclaimer: This story is fiction and never happened. I don't own any of the characters.

Summary: Set months after the release of 'City of Evil', the lives of the Avenged members drastically change when one of their own has to deal with the consequences of a harsh stroke of faith. Nothing is the way it was before. Will things fall apart, or can something good come out of the new situation when unforeseen feelings evolve?

Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6



Chapter 7


“I got you some white bread and a tea for when you wake up. It’s on the nightstand,” Brian explained to his sleeping friend, back in his room, and watched the beads of sweat that were glistening on his forehead.

“I bet your fever has gone up,” Brian muttered quietly and shook his head in disdain.

The singer was very restless and shifted around in the large bed. He seemed to be caught in a feverish dream because he was turning his head from side to side while his facial expression was contorted in discomfort.

When a soft whine left Matt’s throat, Brian almost automatically, without thinking, reached out his hand again and ran his long slender fingers slowly through Matt’s hair. At first, the sick man flinched, but when Brian softly shushed him, he held his head still and visibly relaxed.

“That’s it, calm down.”

As he whispered quiet encouraging words, his gaze moved to Matt’s face and froze. As if he had only now realized that his fingers were entangled in Matt’s hair, he stopped the movement of his hand and uncertainly looked down on it.

What had he been doing there? Matt was his friend, he couldn’t just go and stroke his head. He should be glad that Matt had been asleep and didn’t register any of Brian’s actions. But what if he had? After all, there had been a visible reaction to Brian’s touch…

Brian shook his head. Where was this coming from all of a sudden? It wasn’t like him to be that touchy-feely, not just to Matt, but anyone. Of course, he had enjoyed a hug from a friend once in a while, but in general that kind of physical contact was something he could live without. His attitude concerning that topic had amplified after the accident happened; he just didn’t feel comfortable with being touched. He had found that he had been forced to make an exception with Matt or he’d be unable to use the shower, but this didn’t involve patting his hair. What confused him the most was the fact that he was aware of his whole situation, but yet his hand was still on top of Matt’s head.

Suddenly, the shrill ringing of a phone sounded through the room. It was a bit muffled, but still loud enough to startle both Brian and Matt. Brian jerked his hand back as if he was caught in the act, and Matt uttered a sound which was filled with something that couldn’t be described with anything other than sheer terror.

“No… Syn!”

Not knowing where his friend’s outburst was coming from, he tried to calm his rapidly beating heart by breathing in deeply and exhaling loudly, before he once again quieted down his friend by talking to him softly, not wanting him to wake up completely.

“Matt, it’s okay; it’s just your phone. Go back to sleep.”

Brian quickly wheeled himself to where the sound was coming from: The pants he had pulled off the singer earlier.

He got the phone out of the pocket quickly and checked the caller ID. It was Jimmy calling. He flipped it open and held it to his ear, not getting a chance to talk because the drummer started talking right away.

“Hey Matt, you never called me last night! How did it go yesterday? Was talking to Papa any good for Syn? How is he doing this morning?”

“I’m fine, Jimmy. How are you?”

“Eh… Brian? Uh… wow, I wasn’t expecting that. Usually around this time Matt calls me because he dropped you off at the therapist’s and we talk…” A nervous laugh could be heard. “I mean, not because of that…”

“Of course not,” Brian replied coldly.

“Ah come on. You don’t really think we’d go behind your back, right? You’re our friend, we’d never do that. Well, I don’t know why you’ve got Matt’s phone, but it would be cool if you gave it back right now because I gotta talk to him.”

Brian raised his eyebrows, not content that he didn’t know about what Matt and Jimmy were talking when he wasn’t there, and not knowing how to react to the comment.

“Sorry, but Matt’s asleep right now, he’s sick. He just got back to sleep again, I don’t wanna wake him up, you know? I can take a message if you like…”

“No, it’s okay… What’s wrong with him?” Jimmy asked concerned.

“It’s just a cold, but you know how bad Matt’s always coming down with it. I’m here to take care of him and I think once his fever goes down a bit he’ll be much better.”

“Do you need me, or Zacky or Johnny to come over?”

“No, I can handle it,” Brian answered decidedly.

“Are you sure? I mean, in your particular situation it certainly wouldn’t be a sign of weakness to have someone help you out…”

“Fuck, Jimmy, I told you I could handle it! It’s not that hard to take care of him and I’ve got it all under control.”

“Alright.”

Well… there is something you could help me with, but I don’t need you to come over for that. I was looking for it earlier, but I couldn’t find the bag all the meds are in. Can you tell me where you guys put it?”

Brian could hear Jimmy frown over the phone. “You were looking for it? What do you need them for?”

“Are you serious? I told you a minute ago that Matt was sick! I only want to give him a Tylenol and maybe something for his throat. Can’t you just fucking trust me for once?”

“Syn, it’s not about trust. How do I explain this…?”

“I don’t know how you’re gonna do it, but please tell me once you found a way. It’s obvious to me that there isn’t anyone who thinks I’m capable of being on my own for a day without fucking up. Thanks Jimmy, I really needed that kind of support from you,” he scoffed and continued. “And it’s Brian… So are you telling me now where it is, or what?”

“Man, you got it all wrong. But you can’t get them, I’m sorry –”

“This is a joke, right?” Brian nearly growled.

“No, I really mean it, you can’t get them. They’re on the top shelf of Matt’s wardrobe, hidden behind some clothes. It’s too high for you, we tested it out. I could get them for you, but you don’t want me to come over.”

“That’s right, I don’t!” Brian knew he was acting irrationally, but he didn’t care. This was his life, and he would be damned if he let Jimmy take over that easily.

“Syn – uh, sorry Brian, I understand that you don’t want us there right now. If I was in your position I’d probably react the same way. On the other hand, think about it: Matt’s not doing well, right? You said it yourself that you’d like to give him some meds. Just let me come over, get them for you, and then I’ll leave again. That way we’d all feel better. Come on, let’s be reasonable.”

“Considering the circumstances I like to think I’m acting pretty reasonable. You’re the second one to let me know he doesn’t trust me alone at home – and I know you just want to check up on me.”

“Damnit, can you resent me for wanting to? You never talk to me anymore, and when you do, you’re distant and stand-offish,” Jimmy snapped, took a breath and continued in a softer tone. “You’re my best friend, I can’t help but worry. God, I’m sorry.”

Brian sighed, hating how much his friends were affected by his misery and suffering because of him. He was still reluctant to enable Jimmy the chance to control him, but he couldn’t shake off the thought that not granting his friend’s wish would unsettle Jimmy even more.

“I assure you that I’m getting along just fine. Matt has been in bed all morning so far, and I took care of both of us. I took over a lot of things for him. I got him fresh clothes, I made sure he put them on; I basically put him to bed, I made him breakfast and I’ve been with him in case he needs anything. Personally, I think that this should be enough information to reassure you, but if you need more convincement, you may come over and see for yourself.”

“It sounds like you’ve been pretty busy this morning. But what about you? When did you get fresh clothes and something to eat? It’s great you cared so much for Matt, but don’t neglect yourself.”

“I won’t, don’t worry. I’m as alright as I can be,” Brian said and smiled sadly.

“Okay then… Take care, and tell Matt to call me back as soon as he can.”

“Sure thing... Bye Jimmy.”

“Bye!”

Brian flipped the phone shut and placed it on his lap, while he got himself back to the bed Matt laid in. He was satisfied to notice that Matt had settled down again and slept with a peaceful expression on his face.

“At least you can get some rest, huh?” he sighed and got as comfortable in the wheelchair as he could.


Not even a quarter of an hour later, a car driving up the driveway could be heard. The engine was turned off, and the sounds of a door being opened and shut followed shortly after.

Brian rolled his eyes and groaned. “You gotta be kidding me!”

He had already begun to wheel himself towards the door to his room, ready to make his way into the hallway and down the stairs to be able to open up the door, when features got hard and his eyes cold. A key was inserted into his front door and turned around. Through the now open door came in Jimmy, Zacky, and lastly Johnny.

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” Brian shouted angrily and wheeled himself to the banister.

His friends, who hadn’t seen him yet, spun around and looked up at Brian startled.

“Brian, what…?”

“How the hell did you get the key?” he yelled, knowing he never gave it to any of them.

Johnny only stared up at him with a blank stare, while Zacky nervously sucked his lip ring into his mouth, turned his head to the side so it was facing the open kitchen door and furrowed his brows seconds later. Jimmy paled at the tone of Brian’s voice and twisted the key in his fingers.

“I got it from Matt, just in case he had to go somewhere and you needed anyone to come over,” Jimmy admitted.

“What, am I so severely disabled that I cannot open the door anymore when it rings?” Brian spat.

Jimmy gulped, knowing he made a mistake. “It’s only if there is an emergency…”

“I see… And this is an emergency how?”

“I don’t know.” Jimmy looked to the ground in embarrassment. “I guess I wanted to save you the troubles of having to reach the door first.”

Maybe Jimmy had hoped to appease his agitated friend with this, but unfortunately for the three intruders he reached the exact contrary.

“Are you being serious? Excuse me, did I miss something here? On one hand you want me to go back the way I was, to be independent, and you throw a fit when I miss a therapy session; but on the other hand you don’t trust my word, you think I’m lying when I say I get along because now I have three people standing in my hallway. No one trusts me to do anything on my own, not even to open a door, and everyone is constantly checking up on me. On top of it all my best friends obviously went behind my back.”

“What? Look –”

“No! I won’t fucking ‘look’! You are in no position to talk when you just entered my house without my permission!” Brian growled and cut Johnny off, who now nervously shifted from foot to foot.

“Jim, you wanted to come over to make sure I was alright. I’m not dead, I’m not bleeding and I’m all good behaving in this fuck of a chair, to me that classifies as alright. Get out, get home safe, and don’t call me to ask if I’m okay.”

“But Brian…”

“What, Zack?” Brian hissed and gripped the banister with both hands tightly.

“Just…” Zacky turned his head to the side, looking into the kitchen again, and somehow Brian already knew what Zacky was about to ask. “What happened in the kitchen?”

If the thought of leaving had crossed Jimmy’s mind before, it certainly wasn’t existent anymore, now that everyone had turned their head and seen the telephone lying in the middle of the kitchen floor. Brian inwardly groaned, not wanting to tell anyone what had happened with his father.

“It just fell down and I didn’t bother picking it up. I was busy getting Matt something to eat…”

And there it came, the next question.

“So did you eat too? You said you’d take care of you, and I don’t really see any fresh clothes on you.”

“Jimmy, cut it!” Brian warned.

When Jimmy had stepped back before, he wasn’t about to do it now, not when it came to something so important in his mind. “No, you said you would. That’s the only condition I let you off the hook on the phone earlier. And now I’m here and see you didn’t really do anything.”

Brian’s breath hitched in his throat when the drummer started to get up the stairs.

“Man, I don’t know,” Zacky objected, not feeling comfortable how much his friend was taking action now. “He said he wanted us to go, I think we should listen.”

Johnny, who hadn’t even moved, nodded to Zacky. “Rev, come on…”

“We can leave in a minute; I just want to check up on Matt.”

“I told you to go and I want you to leave now,” Brian hissed, feeling intimidated by the tall man stomping up the stairs. He knew he only had his words to enforce his wants, and that Jimmy didn’t listen to him – in his own house – and ignored his will while coming closer and closer to him was a horrible experience, he felt so helpless and as though his privacy had been invaded.

Now, his friend had reached the top of the stairs and took two steps closer. Jimmy grabbed the wheels of the wheelchair and harshly spun it around, so Brian was suddenly inches away from his face.

“You listen to me, and you better listen good! I don’t care what you want . I know what you need , and if you can’t set your priorities, then I will! You’ve been my best friend for almost half of my life, and no matter how crazy you were acting, I never left you alone. I’m certainly not gonna do it now, so be an asshole as much as you like, you’re not gonna scare me away!”

Leaving Brian speechless and intimidated, Jimmy made his way to what he knew was the guest room Matt was living in now. He was surprised to find it empty and the bed untouched. He turned around in confusion, furrowed his brows and hesitantly approached the door to Brian’s room.

Opening the door, he peeked inside and was surprised to find Matt under the blankets of Brian’s double bed. He chose not to comment that it was obvious that Brian and Matt had slept in the same bed that night, seeing Matt’s bed hadn’t been used and Brian was never one to use the couch. Instead, he stepped into the room quietly to pick up the dirty pizza box that had been thrown onto the ground and not picked up.

Now satisfied, the drummer nodded and went back to the stairs where he had left his friend staring in awe at the sudden force he had used.

“Bye Brian.” As if nothing ever happened, Jimmy patted Brian on his shoulder, ignoring that Brian had flinched again.

Casually, Jimmy hopped down the stairs and motioned for Zacky and Johnny to follow him. With that, he had disappeared out of the front door, the dirty box in his hands.

Johnny coughed quietly and looked to the ground, not daring to look him in the eye. “We… uh, we bought Matt something to bring the fever down on our way to your house.” He pulled out a little case which he put on the table next to the door and shrugged. “Bye, Brian, you can give us a call.” And he went to the car.

“I’m sorry,” Zacky looked up at Brian guiltily, looking at him through the banister that was separating them. He wasn’t quite sure what he was sorry for, the lack of trust, for giving Brian the feeling he had been betrayed, or whether he was sorry for Jimmy’s attitude; but little did he know that their behavior, especially Jimmy’s, would be one of the reasons that were driving Brian closer and closer to his personal abyss. And Zacky left as well, leaving Brian alone, uncertain and more insecure than he had ever been.